/ck/ - Food & Cooking

>>19133256

>be me
>fall for the rice and beans cheap food meme
>go to Walmart and buy bags of rice and beans, beans are not even cheap by the way
>go home
>decide to make a pot of beans
>add beans to pot and cover with water, add onion garlic and salt
>pot of beans constantly needs more water and beans increase in volume exponentially
>end up with pot full to the brim with beans, about 75% cooked through since they're still grainy
>bean liquid nowhere to be seen
>decide to try beans
>actually pretty good, end up eating 1/4 of the pot in one sitting for dinner
>go to sleep, can't stop brapping bean odors, I can't even tolerate my own braps
>go to school
>tried to cropdust the lab as usual but instead of being harmless and quiet braps, my 75% cooked bean powered braps make audible sounds despite me clenching my ass and the smell is unmistakably bean related
>people start to complain about the odor, kinda funny
>Eventually the girls next to me start to figure I'm the one gassing up the lab
>forever known as that guy who farts in class and stinks
>mfw I won't get a gf this year either

Fuck you /ck/

>see all the ebin mcdonald maymays on /ck/
>fuck it, i'll do it live
>order what are two seemingly innocuous sausage egg mcgriddles or whatever the fuck theyre called
>taste alright i guess, nothing special
>fast forward a few hours
>stomach starts to hurt and feel like shit
>drink a bunch of water to counter the food but to no avail
>feel this way for the next couple of days
>even when i workout i still fill like shit from having eaten said food a few days ago

How do people unironically eat this garbage?

>>11144576

>>11130814
>And what kind of monster wants to turn on an oven in August, anyway? That wheezing window air-conditioner can only do so much.

This. I invariably sweat my ass off whenever I cook something. What I wouldn't give for central air conditioning.