/ck/ - Food & Cooking

Quick rundown on this guy?

What's the greatest fast-food mascot of all time?

>I was only 9 years old
>I loved McDonald's so much, I had all the merchandise and toys
>I pray to Ronald McDonald every night before bed, thanking him for the life I’ve been given
>"Mcdonald's is love" I say; “McDonald's is life”
>My dad hears me and calls me a faggot
>I know he was just jealous of my devotion for McDonald's
>I called him a Dairy Queen
>He slaps me and sends me to go to sleep
>I’m crying now, and my face hurts
>I lay in bed and it’s really cold
>Suddenly, a warmth is moving towards me
>It’s Ronald
>I am so happy
>He whispers into my ear “This is my playpen.”
>He grabs me with his powerful clown hands and puts me down onto my hands and knees
>I’m ready
>I spread my ass-cheeks for Ronald
>He penetrates my butt-hole
>It hurts so much but I do it for Ronald
>I can feel my butt tearing as my eyes start to water
>I push against his force
>I want to please Don
>He roars in a mighty roar as he fills my butt with his love
>My dad walks in
>Ronald looks him straight in the eyes and says “It’s all McDone now.”
>Ronald leaves through my window
>McDonald's is love. McDonald's is life.