/ck/ - Food & Cooking

>>16100235
PEE PEE POO POO PEE PEE POO POO

>>14109034

>>14107478
What kind of pehnotype is this?

Is anyone else here a disgusting fat fuck who eats and drinks their feelings away instead of dealing with their problems?

What do you stick in your mouth to keep a gun/dick out of it?

Personally my go to is 2 or 3 packages of ramen noodles stirfryed in vegetable oil with spicy peppers, whatever meat I have in the fridge or a big fat fucking grilled cheese sandwhich on white bread with like 6 or 7 slices of terrible American cheese on there

>>12709049
I weigh quite a bit my friend. Still mobile on two legs though. If I were to get too fat it would compromise my ability to go be gluttonous in restaurants so I don't let it get that far.

>>12250681
>NEET of proper stature

Who /disgusting fat fucking retard/ here? Just order 5 little caesar's hot n ready, planning to eat it all tonight with a handle of vodka.

>have a taco bell challenge with my frat brothers
>win by eating 17 hard supreme tacos
>wake up this morning
>entire dorm room smells like rancid farts
>text from roommate said it was so bad he had to leave the dorm
>go take a pee
>wipe my ass as a precaution
>sharted myself a bit while I slept

I love taco bell bros

For me? It's going to buffets and only eating the steaks,crab, and lobsters to get my moneys worth.

> when you can hear AND feel your stomach gurgling

I have 3 mcchickens and 2 large fries with a large strawberry shake to dip the frys with

grab the food on your plate and mash it in your hands. then smear the food on the wall while screaming "NO TEXAS PETE" over and over again.

>be me
>be hungry
>go to chinese buffet
>grab a plate and load it with the usual greasy buffet items
>eat it all and go for another plate
>intestines start to gurgle
>let out a small shart then clinch my butthole
>presure builds, can't move
>panicing, i burn my hands grabbing a tray of beef and brocoli
>put it on the ground and squatted over it, hoping it will catch my poo
>immediatly blasted brown buckshot, missing the makeshift toilet, spraying the buffet
>people look on in horror as i use a napkin to wipe
>the putrid smell causes them to gag
>clean up is impossible as liquid shit leaks from my anus
>I beg the people not to call the cops
>a woman puked into a tray of chicken in garlic sauce
>my knees gave out, and i fell into my poo
>i ran out of there, probably leaving muddy foot prints
>went home, feeling hungry again
>had a hot pocket while in the shower

>be me
>be hungry
>go to chinese buffet
>grab a plate and load it with the usual greasy buffet items
>eat it all and go for another plate
>intestines start to gurgle
>let out a small shart then clinch my butthole
>presure builds, can't move
>panicing, i burn my hands grabbing a tray of beef and brocoli
>put it on the ground and squatted over it, hoping it will catch my poo
>immediatly blasted brown buckshot, missing the makeshift toilet, spraying the buffet
>people look on in horror as i use a napkin to wipe
>the putrid smell causes them to gag
>clean up is impossible as liquid shit leaks from my anus
>I beg the people not to call the cops
>a woman puked into a tray of chicken in garlic sauce
>my knees gave out, and i fell into my poo
>i ran out of there, probably leaving muddy foot prints
>went home, feeling hungry again
>had a hot pocket while in the shower

Why do people get mad over putting pineapple on pizza

>>9677758
>manager calls you in to show you surveillance footage of you opening packets in your car and you bribe him with $50 to erase the footage
>it works