/ck/ - Food & Cooking

>*sips your coffee*
>*spits it all over your face*
>WHAT LE FUCKIN HECK!!!?!????
>WHAT LE FUCK IS THIS HECKIN SWILLERINO YOUVE PRESENTED ME?!?!??
>IS THIS *wretches violently* IS THIS A ROBUSTA??!!?!?
>AND ITS NOT EVEN HECKIN’ SINGLE ORIGIN?!?!???????
>YOU KNOW I ONLY DRINK SPECIALTY GRADE ARABICA THAT HAS BEEN RATED AT LEAST A 94 OR HIGHER BY THE SPECIALTY COFFEE CUPPING GRADING INSTITUTION!!!!
>WHAT ELEVATION WAS IT BREWED AT?????
>DID YOU AT LEAST ROAST IT YOURSELF????
>OH MY SCIENCE YOU DIDNT ROASTT IT?!?!?
>BUT YOU KNOW THE LOCAL ROASTER WHO MADE IT AND ONLY CHOSE TO BUY IT FROM HIM BECAUSE HE DONATED 20% OF HIS PROCEEDS TO HELPING UNDERPRIVILEGED INNER-CITY SCHOOL CHILDREN RIGHT!?!??!
>WHAT?!?!? ITS FROM THAT CHUDCEL CENTRAL HECKIN WALMARTARINO???
>AND YOU USED A CONIC BURR INSTEAD OF A FLAT ONE???
>OH MY GOD I CANT HANDLE THIS I NEED TO VENT TO MY WIFE BUT SHES ON HER SEMI-DAILY VISIT TO TYRONES HOUSE TO HAVE BEAUTIFUL HALF BLACK MULATTO CHILDREN BRED INTO HER!
>OH WHAT A WORLD WHAT A WORLD!
>AND TO THINK! I WAS READY TO INVITE YOU AS THE NEWEST MEMBER OF OUR D&D ENTHUSIAST/ POLYCULE COMMUNE BUT THEN I FOUND OUT YOU BREW AT 212 DEGREES INSTEAD OF THE SPECIALTY COFFEE BREWER ASSOCIATION RECCOMENDATION OF 195-205 DEGREES!!
>THIS IS THE WORST THING TO HAPPEN EVER SINCE THAT FASCIST WHO SHALL NOT BE NAMED #45 TRIED TO OVERTHROW THE ELECTION ON JANUARY 6TH!