/ck/ - Food & Cooking

>>18330602

I think he likes burgers so I would make him one of my burgers. I always get compliments on them. Lots of onion powder is the secret.

If I really wanted to impress him I would do a Thai or Viet dish, some kind of noodle/salad or curry slop. Those get the best reviews when I make them.

Oh and my gf went sex crazy on me once when I made her a German spread of schnitzel, stroganoff and potato salad so if I want him to make me cum like 6 times in 24 hours I'd make that again.

>>18186311

I don't know why but that picture makes me really sad. She looks so sweet and nice but just kinda goofy and something sad and lonely about her at the same time.

Anyway, to answer your question, it obviously depends on the girl. Some girls would love a hot dog and an ice cream with a walk through the park, and some girls (stuck up rich cunts) would be very offended by something like that.

Some mid-level sushi would probably be decent for most women, since it gives them a chic and cool vibe and they don't have to worry about looking like a sloppy fucking pig in front of you. Or Mexican, I have yet to meet a female that doesn't love shitty queso.

>>18153963

That's one of my favorite things to cook for my fiancee, she goes bonkers on my dick when ever I make it for her. It's not super hard either.

I've had a couple curries that were pretty mindblowing. A big TX bbq platter is something special too. Oh and a seafood place in Tulum had the best seafood I've ever had in my life.

>>18072633

My very first gf was a black chick whose family were all from the swamps in LA. She couldn;t cook at all, but her mom made incredible soul food (gumbo, pork chops and shit). I got invited to her family reunion, and being a male, I had to help with the pig slaughter for the boudin. One of the weirder and most intense things I've ever done.

My ex was a Jew, and her family were all retards when it came to cooking. The first time she tried cooking for me, she wanted to make healthy fried chicken, so she breaded some shitty Walmart breast tenders with corn flakes and oatmeal and baked them. Fucking inedible. It was at least nice because I could make something super simple, but new to her, and she thought I was a culinary wizard and would get some milktruck sex afterwards.

>>18042859

I have something wrong with me when it comes to seafood. Like my brain/stomach connection just shuts down and I will uncontrollably gorge myself. I'm not even a fat fuck or anything, I just stop feeling full when I get around seafood and only seafood.

Back in the day, IHOP had a weird promo where they offered bottomless popcorn shrimp. My friend knew about my relationship with seafood and offered to take me to IHOP and pay for my meal just so he could witness what I was going to do.

I think it was around basket number 8 or 9 where the waiter started nervously chuckling when he brought the shrimp out to me. He would come by and say things like "Hahaha, man you really like your shrimp, doncha pal hahaha." I think he told the manager about me cause he would walk by and kinda look at the table and pretend like he wasn't.

I once ate so much crawfish once that I started getting tunnel vision and horrible diarrhea but I kept eating them. I was dating a nurse at the time and she finally convinced me to stop because she realized I was probably giving myself iodine or salt poisoning or some shit. I could hardly walk lol

Anyway, back to your question. If they're just boiled, cold shrimp with some cocktail sauce, I could do several pounds. A little less if they're fried or cooked in butter or whatever. So probably 80-120 extra jumbo as a low number.

>>18017499

There's only a handful of people in the world that I genuinely want to die

Like there's tons of people I know and tons I don't actually know that I really hate, but I don't want them to die or anything. I just want to banish them away to an island or something.

But I really want that piece of shit to die

Everything about him...his smug, pseudo-intellectual, gotcha brand of "humor". His whole "I'm African so I'm worldly and cosmopolitan" shtick. His angle of blacks being the forever victims because of evil white people but somehow blacks are the superior race too?

>>17994897

My gf went to culinary school and almost everyone in her class had next to zero real kitchen experience.

Some kids picked it up quickly but some kids were full on retarded and even by the end were nothing more than a hazard in a restaurant.

Of course the more background you have in cooking, the more of a leg up you'll have in school, but most programs assume you're starting from the ground floor.

That being said, if you're curious about working in a kitchen, I'd suggest finding a busboy or dishwasher job. You'll literally be able to start that day, and you'll find out real fucking fast if you like it or not. Most kitchens are very fast, crowded, and hot, and are full of the most reprehensible and emotionally unstable people around. My gf thrives in that shit, but I could never do it. I just sit at my computer and look at building plans all day.

>>16972708

Just gave myself a good burn on my hand pulling a chicken out the oven cause my gf bought shitty oven mitts, but it's far from the worst

I've had some pretty gnarly slices and chopped off chunks of fingers, and the usual culprit is a bread knife for some reason.

I've got some belly scars from drunkenly frying shit and dropping things in the wrong way and it splashed toward me.

It's not really cooking related but I was doing some plumbing work for a friend in their kitchen and the shitty old copper water line sheared off while I was tightening it and my hand slipped into the jagged exposed end of the pipe. Have a huge scar running down my thumb and wrist from that one.

>>16783231

I think the first thing I think of when figuring out what to cook is what ingredients do I actually have on hand. Gotta have noodles in the pantry if I want to do noodles. Always looking for what's on sale too.

I think the next thing is what kind of style food I'm in the mood for. Asian, Mexican, American, whatever, and then specific type of food, salad, soup, whatever. I'm always looking for new ideas, and I always make mental notes on how I think things are made when I'm eating out.

Finally I try to think about how much effort I actually feel like putting into it. Sometimes I get really fucking depressed for whatever reason and I'll just eat like 6 ham sandwiches for dinner. Like right now I don't feel like doing much so I cut up a tomato, onion and a cucumber and drenched it wit cesear dressing for lunch

I think they're made up of a bunch of pinko faggot hipsters but my gf turned me on to Bon Apetit recipes. Everything I've made from them has been really good, or at least a solid launching point for me to come up with something else.

>>11470822

For breakfast, some sliced ham and a pear and some shit coffee from work

For lunch, cold roasted chicken from the grocery store and another pear. I also was trying to avoid this weird lady at my job so I ducked into the breakroom, and figured I should buy something so I got a Coke Zero

For dinner, my gf had a really shitty day, and cheap fast food cheers her up, so I got us burgers and shakes from Braum's.

I might eat some more chicken or potato salad in a bit.

>>10663714

Quick marinade the steak in apple juice, soy sauce, garlic, pepper, and cumin

Fast sous vide. Sear, rest, slice thinly against the grain

Grill the onions and eggplant. Make some kind of light and crisp salsa/topping with the apple juice and veggies.

Serve with cilantro and simple black beans, and warm flour tortillas.

Get in front of judges. Explain dish. Get asked why I got into cooking. Tell cute story about being my dad's little helper while he cooked. I would run and grab what he needed from the fridge. He even got me a little apron with my initials on it. He taught me the basics, and I just went from there. But what do I know. My dad owns this factory downtown, and it's just a big empty building with a big hole in the middle of the floor, and my dad pays a bunch of homeless guys to jack off into the hole 24 hours a day, and there's a special pipe that runs from the factory to our house and my dad just sits around in his recliner and chugs all that cum pretty much every day.

>>10218075

>teaching middle school
>on lunchroom duty one day
>group of little shit mexican dudes always doing dumb shit
>can see them whispering and looking around and digging in a backpack
>totally not about to do some retarded shit
>walk away so they can go ahead and start whatever theyre trying to get into
>30 seconds later
>smell smoke
>spin around
>theyre all gone
>run over
>theyre huddled underneath the cafeteria table passing around a newport
>they thought they were gonna get some street cred or something
>every single kind in the school thinks theyre retarded and glad they end up suspended

fuck you juan and chris and other juan

It's all subjective on your tastes, bro. I love the taste of meat so much, I really don't even need any sauce or spices to enjoy it, but there's so many different flavor profiles that you can choose from. I had a Korean style pork butt the other day that was out of this world.

I wish people would stop fighting over different regional BBQ styles/sauces. Just like what you like and be done with it.

Then again, this is 4chan.

This is on every table in Costa Rica...it has a kind of tangy and sweet, but rich vegetable flavor. Goes great with everything.

Well...considering I don't give a shit anymore...

I had a 6 pack of Natty Light and a few Marb Reds for breakfast, then managed to scarf down some cold ribs I cooked a few days ago. I went for a walk and puked everything up, so I came home and made a tuna sandwich (a can of tuna dumped onto a piece of bread), and some pretty good garlic pickles I bought. I chased that with a few shots of vodka and passed out.

After waking, I then tried to eat some more ribs, but couldn't do it, so I drove to the bar. I time it just right so I can maximize my drinking before the shift change, so the second shift bartender has no idea that I've had 11 Guinesses, and I can keep pounding away. I then drove around drunk, praying I would crash and die and make it look like an accident, until I drove past Sonic and decided I wanted a Texas Toast burger with some tots, so I got that. I then ate it while sitting on the toilet, shitting my brains out and smoking some more Reds.

I'll probably have Subway tomorrow, if I don't feel like eating the rest of my ribs.

>>6391564

pura vida mudda fuckas

I spent a good chunk of time in Costa Rica a while back. I fell in love with everything there, but especially the food. The best meal I've ever had was at a little shack in the town I was in. I was in an area with a huge Caribbean influence. I had this massive bowl of seafood coconut curry with fish, shrimp, clams, and crab, and a ton of fresh veggies. I was almost brought to tears by how good it was. Oh, and it helps that it cost like 2.00, and was made by a super sweet old lady.

Also, they put pic related on everything. It's a rich, tangy, sweet, cumin-y sauce. It's like crack.