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/cgl/ - Cosplay & EGL

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9918900 No.9918900 [Reply] [Original] [rbt]

Feels thread: "how do I get all the other girls at the Lolita convention to scream: NO BOARDERS. NO WALLS. NO USA AT ALL."-edition >Disregard bait >post /cgl/ feels

>> No.9918939
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Hey Anzu-anon, just tell your girlfriend that even though she'll never be as pretty and cute as Anzu, if she works hard enough she can become a good substitute for you!
I'm sure that will cheer her up!

>> No.9918940

I like anzu because she looks like my girlfriend. Not the other way around.

>> No.9918941

>immediately replying to a shitpost to defend yourself again
So you do have autism, right?

>> No.9918942


>> No.9918943

So why do you only have hundreds of Anzu's pictures saved if you've gone through thousands of them?
What criteria do they have to meet to be added to your collection?

>> No.9918944

Don't know. I generally save the ones where she's closer looking to my girlfriend. I couldn't give you an objective list.

>> No.9918965

Daily reminder to stop replying to the Anzu-obsessed autist

>> No.9918967

>gained 20+lbs because working in food service, poor/lazy (so only ate at work) and was generally in a rough spot
>brand OPS started getting tight and my bust was always on the large side which didnt help
>gave myself NYR to start going to the gym
>lost 30lbs, back to my lowest weight in high school but not skinny fat this time
>still hate cardio, but into lifting heavy sticks with weights on them in various positions.
>look so much better in lolita
>boobs got two sizes smaller but can now fit into any brand easy
>cant decide if want to lose another 10 lbs to make my high school self proud or not or try to get to wheyfu mode
>good feels for the first time in years
>still self conscious about wearing sleeveless or anything showing my stomach even if its "flat"
>might even be able to pull off gyaru now

>losing weight is 80-90% diet, you cant outrun your fork.

>> No.9918977 [DELETED] 
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>tfw no gf

>> No.9918995
File: 123 KB, 1400x1400, in the feels.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>sharing hotel room
>really nervous about making a fool of myself

>> No.9918998
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>got my new bear mask
>I now feel 100x more attractive

I wish burqas were acceptable male clothing, I would literally just wear that whenever I have to go in public.

>> No.9919056

Man I just really love lolita

>> No.9919059
File: 700 KB, 1020x1391, image.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>no borders, no wall, no USA at all
BIG THINK. I do like your taste in anthro gun girls tho

>> No.9919061

This board really got me in the habit of calling my fat ass cat fatty-chan and every time I see you guys say itit just reenforces my idea that a fatty-chan is a chubby qt, and it's pretty funny. I love my cat

>> No.9919062



>> No.9919064

Congrats, anon, you're doing good!

>> No.9919066

Man, I just really hate sweet lolita

>> No.9919067
File: 34 KB, 480x480, 1490746987607.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

My BF and I are downsizing into a one-bedroom and as a result I'm probably going to be putting all my cosplays in storage. I also am getting prepared to start my clinical years for nursing school so all my attention has to go towards studying so I'm probably going to be stopping cosplay for the time being, if not for good. On one hand, I won't miss the drama, the money spent, and the constant need to look perfect, but on the other I have so many friends I've met through cosplay, including my s/o. How does one make friends in their mid-20's that doesn't involve cosplay and having free time?

>> No.9919072

And fucktards like this make being trans harder thanks. It's not like I don't understand people's concerns when people like this are running around, I just want to be able to pee sometimes.

>> No.9919073
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This is so adorable

>> No.9919075

when i see a guy coord with a number of JSKs, i often believe the guy is trans. i keep this thought inside my mind and do not gossip on it with other lolitas.

my impression is often confirmed. they began wearing lolita as a male and later on come out as trans. does anyone else see that way too?

>> No.9919077

Why just JSKs and not OPs?

>> No.9919083

Yeah might be a form of them testing out a different form of gender expression than their norm.

>> No.9919087

Too short sleeves and too narrow shoulders. Most of the guys are taller and they have wider shoulders, so it's rather risky to buy an OP in such case.
With JSKs you don't have to worry about that.

>> No.9919092

Man I just really love cosplay

>> No.9919093

I don’t see how wearing jsk makes you trans? Buying what fits you better just means you understand how to dress yourself.

>> No.9919096
File: 205 KB, 720x1178, 1529415133359.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

4chan's favorite pornstar just had a baby and it's making me hyper aware that I'm 31 and still single

>> No.9919102

You should let me impregnate you

>> No.9919104

that’s a photo of the porn star, baka

>> No.9919105


>> No.9919106

Honestly, as long as you’re not a fatty chan, I’ll do it

>> No.9919108
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I'm ugly and I'm proud
I'm Ugly And I'm Proud

>> No.9919112

Sure is summer in here

>> No.9919113

Hi ugly and proud, I’m dad

>> No.9919119

That's Ms. Ugly A. Proud to you.

>> No.9919136

If i had to guess that half Nip half bong lady, married and made very pregnant from some guy from Dubai.

>> No.9919194

>tfw life is boring and this board doesn’t move fast enough

>> No.9919197
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>tfw iktf

>> No.9919199

Go crossboardinb

>> No.9919200
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>tfw no visual kei bf
>tfw I’ll never get one because visual kei is dying

>> No.9919223

I went crossboarding once. next thing I knew I was spending $500/month on frilly Japanese dresses.

>> No.9919228

Tfw no $500 a month to spend on frilly dresses.

>> No.9919239

If you're hot enough you could always go to japan and go after a bandoman

>> No.9919244
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>tfw just a poorfag

>> No.9919263
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>listening to more vocaloid again
>suddenly want to cosplay all those 9+ year old song versions again
>tfw the hype is dead compared to how it used to be and friends not interested in it anymore
>tfw these gloriously cringy but fun years will never happen again
It's true gulls, the ride never ends, it only pauses. Once a weeb, always a weeb.

>> No.9919266

Vocaloid is forever anon, follow your dreams.

>> No.9919268

Do it anon! Vocaloid will always be around, during a con early this year there was a guy dressed as secret police Miku and that song is old

>> No.9919270

I'm not even a weeb and I love Vocaloid. There is some really good music made with it. Go for it anon. There is always at least 5 miku's at even each game con anyways, can't imagine animecons are better.

>> No.9919279

I know that feel anon.
If it makes you feel better, some of the 9+ year old songs are still the most popular Vocaloid songs (Magnet, Romeo and Cinderella, Daughter of Evil, Meltdown, etc)
>or I’m wrong and I’m an oldfag too

>> No.9919284
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Yeah someone please shitpost with me, feels thread interactions is one of the few things that lets me forget about my crippling loneliness and depression

>> No.9919286

I gotchu babygull, I'm here

>> No.9919292
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Thank you mate

>> No.9919293
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>Con season
>People I met through cons saying on IG that it was nice meeting me and that I’m a sweet, funny person
>I’m an actual autist with a shitty personality
>I can’t let them find out
>Better delete all social media, change my name, and maybe get plastic surgery so they don’t recognize me at future cons

>> No.9919299

Good job anon

Kinda same except I'm rich enough to fill my sadness with material possessions

This means you're passing though

>> No.9919301
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We're in this shit together

>> No.9919309
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Material possessions haven't been able to fill the void anymore for a while now for me

Thank you anon, it's good to know there are people like you hanging out here at least

>> No.9919310
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>tfw no lolita gf to operate with

You probably already know who I am anyway

>> No.9919313

>tfw no seagull gf

>> No.9919316
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>tfw no dandy bf to operate with

>> No.9919318
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>tfw no one at all because you've been banished to a flyover state

>> No.9919325
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>tfw no lolita gf to get shitfaced with

>> No.9919327
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>tfw you understand you will never be happy and will ruin anyone who attempts to date you
Please stop trying to fix me. It doesn't work, Im just a shitty person. Im not magically going to become a good person if we date. Ill probably just seem shittier.
I know I said I would cosplay with you because you can't sew for shit and I can. I just want to fuck in costumes. I don't feel emotion for you.
Sorry. Get better taste

>> No.9919340
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>tfw no lolita gf to have big family with
>tfw no dressing up the whole family"
>tfw no growing old together and seeing which one dies sadly first, in a senior home

>> No.9919341
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can we stop about this please, we know his gf deserves better

>> No.9919342

in your line of work, lots of your friends will either be fellow students or future coworkers

the money will be worth it, keep watching anime

>> No.9919345

>nobody has responded to or acknowledged him all day

>> No.9919359
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>Embroidering flowers
>Simple design
>Four rounded petals
>Supposed to be easy
>Keep stressing out over symmetry and shape
>Want the petals to be identical
>Keeps redoing stitches
>Once backpedaled two whole petals
>Finish flower
>Still not happy with it
>Got like nine more to go

God fucking damnit the larp is in like two weeks!

Worst part:
>Oh Anon it will look fine!
>Omg that's so pretty

>> No.9919388

There should be a con specifically for oldfags. Anything that came out post-2014 is banned. Anyone born 2000 or later isn’t allowed. None of this sjw safe space uwu that today’s cons have. None of these costhots and fuckboys who are just there to party and don’t even know who Inuyasha or Goku are.

2007-2013 were peak times to be a weeb and I miss it.

>> No.9919398

>I'll just ruin anyone who attempts to fix me
You seriously underestimate my mental fortitude.
That being said, I am a pretty boring person beyond my skillsets and the fact I shitpost on 4chin

>> No.9919403
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>realize that most of my favorite Vocaloid songs are 9+ years old
When did I get this fucking old?

>> No.9919405
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Have you considered that while having higher standards for yourself than others can be annoying, it's a really great trait to have because it pushes you to improve?
I'm sure you're doing well anon, as long as you're doing better than yourself from yesterday you're doing good!

>> No.9919408

>cosplaying for the first time in july at a con

what to expect, gulls. i'm a grill so maybe more pictures than guys i'd assume, but do i do my normal con routine just in cosplay? or try to attend a shoot or make myself more seen at panels and such?

>> No.9919411

Friend just sent me this. I told her not to bully Lolitas. Which one of you was this though?

>> No.9919413
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Reeeeeeeeee forgot image

>> No.9919426

lol that lady staring in the background.

>> No.9919427

are you a lolita? kinda weird of your friend to be weird about it if you are? she doesn't even look ita or anything as far as I can tell.

>> No.9919429

I was actually a different poster but I do hope things go better for you regardless.

>> No.9919431

Neither of us are but I browses cgl

>> No.9919443

>be in better shape than cosplay friends
>no question about it, thinner and fitter
>still end up looking huge in photos

It's probably an unfortunate combination of being shit at posing, having a good four inches on most of my cosplay friends that make me look Bigger even if I'm not fatter, and "recovered" ED brain that still often adds 10+ pounds in my eyes when I look at myself in photos, but it sucks ass. Gonna practice the hell out of poses before my next shoot/con.

>> No.9919444

She looks cute

>> No.9919445


>> No.9919462
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Oy vey, that's a pretty big accusation goy.

>> No.9919485

Shit posting and skill sets is all I am.
Its literally just costuming, lifting, and table tops for me.
Im on team boring as well

>> No.9919489

>tfw tell gf about my knife play fetish
>I want her to cut me and I want to cut her
>Then lick each other's wounds whilst fucking or in foreplay
>She's 100% freaked the fuck out
>It's now day 4 and refuses to have sex with me

Girls are such pussies.

>> No.9919491

>tfw I am the lolita who gets shitfaced, but no bf

>> No.9919492

she looks adorable and well dressed.
clarissa xue, you're a bitch. don't take pics of people you don't know, you rude asshole.

>> No.9919496

Where you been all my life?

>> No.9919506

She looks super cute. Clarissa is a dumb bitch.

>> No.9919509

>tfw no gf to do this with me

My gf won't do this to me anymore, because I got an infection. I just wanna live out my edgy guro/ero-lolita dreams

>> No.9919517

gtfo crossboarder

>> No.9919526

Ah, so this is what normies do with their photos.

>> No.9919541

Guys she's actually really nice IRL I swear.
All she did was take a picture of something she didn't understand and thought was funny. My response was literally "Don't bully lolitas their self esteem is low enough as it is"

>> No.9919544

Other anons already said I could stay because I wasn't too loud

>> No.9919546


>> No.9919548

Fuck off. Both she and you are massive cunts

>> No.9919549

You're being too loud. You need to go.

>> No.9919551

Fuck off you daft cunt

>> No.9919554
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I thought we talked about not accepting bait gulls

>> No.9919566

Please inform me what you think the correct thing to do in that situation was. I already said "don't bully lolitas"

You're actually the first person that had a problem with me being a xboarder since I came here.

I was actually legitimately curious if any of you were that person, I was wondering what percentage of lolitas browsed cgl.

>> No.9919609

I do what I want

>> No.9919622
File: 95 KB, 720x720, 1528737149930.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>haven't heard anything about Ani-comix (local con) in a while
>generally, they try to hold one event per month
>this month, they were supposed to have an anniversary event
>some latin american voice actors for Star vs The Forces of Evil were supposed to come
>the event got cancelled, just two days before it was supposed to take place
>not a peep from Ani-comix since the cancellation message

>and this is the second time they cancelled an event this year
They're fucking dead, aren't they?

>> No.9919630

>cosplayed for the very first time as a touhou
>meet another touhou girl and we exchange contacts to share the pictures to one another
>we have been talking for almost a month now and she's super flirty and cute to me
>she's not straight either and goes out of her way to call me pretty, cute, and to remind me of how she's more attracted to girls than the rest
I can't say my first experience wasn't eventful. Does this usually happen, starting relationships with someone you don't know on an event? For dykes and gays at least. I'm not a fat turbo dyke and have really long hair so people can't usually tell, so I thought I'd never meet someone through cosplaying. I saw so many cute girls I nearly died.

Next event I hope I meet another person with similar interests, it felt so nice. It feels refreshing to make friends and maybe more, I thought it was just a dream.

>> No.9919632
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I just found out I am pregnant and I have many, many /cgl/ feels.

I remember seeing a thread on pregnant lolita months ago and thought to myself "wtf, just wear it if you like it, I'm sure pettis can cover belly for the majority of pregnancy" and now I'm kicking myself because I'm so embarrassed. I feel silly even researching what kinds of dresses I should wear in a few months. Someone told me, "why are you even worried about these dresses when you have a baby coming?" and I have to consider it. All my funds are going to what's coming, but until I can't afford things I can't bring myself to just up and sell my clothes and quit lolita all together. Am I being selfish? I'm almost certain that as long as it doesn't cause problems it shouldn't be a big deal what I wear, but I get judged left and right for it regularly (whether quietly or otherwise) and now that I'm having a kid, it seems like people frown upon me wearing lolita. Why is that? Am I wrong for wanting to dress up still?

I'll probably be back with many more things to whine about, I apologize in advance

>> No.9919636

>buy a stupid mug with my favourite cosplayers name on it for giggles
>I send it to her thinking she'll get a laugh
>she liked it enough to post it on her main page

Can't say I was expecting this but I'm glad I made her happy.

>> No.9919670

That's really cute anon
Best of luck being a mom

>> No.9919671

It's pretty obvious she wants you anon, give it to her.

>> No.9919674

I am actually not that anon, I'm just being cgl mom rn :V

>> No.9919677

Sounds like the standard middle-aged people thing. Once you have kids the world expects you to throw everything you once enjoyed out the window for them.

Sometimes I'm glad I accidentally made myself sterile so I don't have to make the choice whether or not to have kids anymore.

>> No.9919678
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I think so, but I'm too incredulous to believe it still!
>I'd love to go out just the two of us
>can I hug you when I meet you
>you're so precious anon, you were the best thing about the event
Holy shit. Why aren't more girls gay like this?

>> No.9919680

You could totally wear sack dresses anon and it would be adorable as heck desu <3 congrats and don't sell your wardrobe! You can always get back into it

>> No.9919682

Why isn't everyone more like this?

>> No.9919696

Because she's 17 and I'm like 23 and very anxious around girls. Also dubious humor (which she surprisingly has too) and desensitized to politically incorrect shit, which causes normies to get the wrong idea, despite not being an edgelord or anything like that. I'm way too chill, when I think about it.

Also, most people aren't gay. Most of us are pussies, though.

>> No.9919712

oh my god everyone wake up i'm bored (which is a feel) entertain me.

>> No.9919713

If you're the older partner, take a step up. She probably admires you a lot, do your best.

Hello, anon. What would you like to talk about?

>> No.9919719

Is anyone surprised? Rarely there might be someone who wants to take a picture because they legitimately like how we look and want to show a friend or family member, but the majority of pictures are taken by people who think we’re freaks to be made fun of. When I’m out with my comm we’ve had guys come right up to us with their phone in our faces, clearly filming us while laughing. I’m sure we’re on IG and Snapchat and various FB groups many times over.

>> No.9919722

You will probably get an update near august. But yeah, the silence is not a good look.

>> No.9919723

I'll do my best. Thank you!

>> No.9919729

I always want to talk to lolitas when I see them, because I really like the fashion, but I never do because I figure they'll think I'm one of those guys. That or some creepy ageplay fetishist, which is probably even worse.

>> No.9919730

Thats awesome, congratulations! You can still do what you love and care about your children, your priorities will just switch up a little bit. You're not selfish, and I don't think you should sell your dresses, and I bet people care less than you think they do about lolita and motherhood.

>> No.9919732

Sounds like we just gotta lift the boring away then anon

>> No.9919734

eh idk there is nothing good to talk about.

>> No.9919747

I keep getting occasional feelings of wanting to dress up like a cute girl. Not even as a sexual thing or a dysphoria thing it's just because I want to be cute and it looks like a bunch of fun.

>tfw manly fucking face, no soft features at all except lips
>really deep manly voice
>athletic body type from playing football and gym

Why is life so damn fucking cruel anon? Do girls ever get the same thing of just wanting to be a rough boy every now and then?

>> No.9919750

I have the same thing. I crossplayed when I was younger and really skinny and I pulled it off pretty well, too. I could never do it now that I'm into my 30s, age hasn't treated me badly but it's made me much more masculine.

>> No.9919751

Idk I'm a tranny and it sucks. I'm not super overtly masculine but my face is too long. I probably look horrible but I can't even really tell because all my friends are too nice.

>> No.9919754

how did you make yourself accidentally sterile?

>> No.9919756

If you get kicked hard enough in the nards they stop working

>> No.9919760

How hard? Enough to get hospitalized when you got kicked?

>> No.9919761

most times i post an outfit shot i either a) have people speculate that i'm anorexic b) get messages about my body or c) am reposted to thinspo/ED blogs. it messes me up because i feel like i'm a healthy weight and that there isn't any issue. i keep worrying that other people are seeing some issue that i don't see, but either way it makes me really self conscious.

the eating disorder blogs mess me up the most though because i eat my 2-3 meals a day and the idea of somebody thinking they have to starve to achieve my average body type makes me feel guilty and sick. i'm thinking of sticking to floordinates for a while because i'm unreasonably sad about this.

>> No.9919764

>Once you have kids the world expects you to throw everything you once enjoyed out the window for them.

It's not this, so much as babies are a lot of fucking work and you really won't have the time or energy for a life outside of them, at least for the first couple years. Eventually you get your life back, but don't have kids if you aren't ready to forego conventions in favor of wiping their ass and warming up formula.

>> No.9919765

Steroid abuse. It's unlikely to happen to anyone but I just got unlucky. Oh well. I hate kids anyway.

>> No.9919767

I think I could have pulled off crossplay a few years ago but once I hit 21 I had sort of a second puberty with my face. I used to get confused for a girl as a teenager because I had an androgynous emo haircut and was deathly thin.

I know I'm not trans for sure. I know I'm a boy and don't think I'm anything else. Just sometimes I really want to be a girl. Do my makeup, put my hair in a ponytail with a scrunchie and wear some nice clothes sounds like a lot of fun.

I wish you the best tranny anon.

>> No.9919770

You could reach out to those people and tell them you got that from eating regularly and exercising. It might make them see that you don't have to starve yourself in order to be thin. Be the good you would like to see, I'm sure those girls will be thankful at least in the future for it

>> No.9919776

I feel you. I used to get comments all the time about how thin I was but I was properly thin and I ran a fashion IG at the time. I was within an anorexic BMI category but wasn't anorexic. Just only ate one meal a day because that's really all I could stomach plus like 5-6 cups of black coffee and I had girls and guys asking me if they should do what I do which was the dumbest shit in the world and made me feel bad that I shut down my IG because I felt like I was just perpetuating a really, really unhealthy way of life.

I regret shutting in down because I realise I got so many more positive comments rather than these negative ones.

Don't let it distract you from what you love. If that's how your body is, don't let other people make you feel guilty for just being you and how you naturally are. It's not your fault that they idealise you, it's their own fault. It's not your responsibility. You are not them, you do not control them and you are not their mother.

>> No.9919783

Aww, I see. Sorry to ask, I was just wondering what happened. I am also sterile but because of body chemistry just not working correctly.

>> No.9919785

Don't be sorry. It was my fault. I knew the risks of what I was doing. It's actually incredibly rare to become permanently infertile from steroid use if you can believe that, I just got unlucky.

I feel sorry for someone like yourself who never did anything wrong. Life is wrong.

>> No.9919802

Maybe she doesn't want your HIV.

>> No.9919813

Sometimes it sucks but I don't know. Perhaps it's a blessing. I worry more about guys not wanting me because I'm "useless". Oh well.

To keep it somewhat cgl related, I got a brand new piece of brand 2nd hand today for so cheap, which is great because I ALMOST purchased it new from Baby but it sold out the day I went to order it... saved over 200 bucks through sheer luck.

>> No.9919815

Thank you! I have no idea how I'm gonna do it, but I'm trying my best!

Damn, from someone carrying a child that stings to read but in all reality I know my life would probably be fine whether I chose to have children or not. I was happy without, and now that I'm with, it feels almost like it was meant to be this way. Probably primitive shit fucking with me. But I don't think I'd feel like anything was missing, so I'm sure you can live just as full a life as someone with kids. I don't know why I'm saying this, I guess it just makes me sad to imagine a gull being sad about that even though you didn't say you were.

I agree with the middle-aged thing. I'm pretty young, and I've noticed it is my older friends saying things like this. It's just hard to outright reject ANY advice on this, if someone told me rubbing my belly 36 times a day would make a healthy baby I'd probably do it. No risks, man.

I have one single sack dress and it's on my top shelf along with two ugly maternity dresses. I consider it a maternity dress at this point, good to know I won't look like a complete clown, pfff!

I appreciate it!

I used to be an ana-chan in this thread and on lots of ED forums. It never occurred to me until just now that some of the selfies might not be by members of those places and that makes me feel so guilty. I can't imagine how this feels - but if you know that you don't view food or your weight in any skewed way, you probably don't have an ED. If you don't plan your meals hours or days in advance you're most likely not the same as them, so I would not question yourself too much. As for the photos, maybe periodically posting that you don't want your images reposted and messaging those blogs might make people at LEAST slow down. What the other anon said about telling the ana-chans that you don't have to starve to have your figure, that does sound sweet also, but remember that you don't owe it to them.

>> No.9919816

Post pics. We are never too nice here.

Also did you have HRT or SRS yet? That makes a big difference.

>> No.9919818

They probably think you should mature and grow out of lolita. When you are a mom you are expected to be the adult, no fun allowed.

>> No.9919819

I'm excited to turn 21 so that I can go to con parties and drink with friends and stuff, but in hindsight I've heard all these stories about people getting drugged or assaulted when drinking at cons and I'm kind of the type of person to get tired at 8 pm or even earlier at cons so. I don't know. I guess if I just use common sense then I'll be fine?

>> No.9919822

Don't feel useless. There's a lot of people who just opt out of having kids. There's a lot more men out there who want a child-free life than women. At least in my experience. So don't fret gull. You're not useless or broken, you're going to make someone very very happy one day with your companionship and that's what matters.

Sometimes it's difficult to accept. I haven't told my family or anyone really. So they'll expect kids in the next 10 years.

I've come to terms with no children, I'm not entirely happy but people have done it before. I don't think I'd be a good dad anyway. I just think it's just going to break my heart when I'll meet a girl, fall in love with her and have to tell her we can never have our own children. That's going to break me; having to hurt the person I love.

But in any case, I'm really happy for you being a mommy and I hope you and your baby are happy and healthy.

>> No.9919831

Neither me nor my kin will be the adult. We will both wear frilly dresses. (I've found a good amount of lolita for children, but ouji is a different story - I'm slightly panicked at the thought of being given a prince and no clothes to dress him up in.)

I'm at an age where my family is just asking "Why aren't you in college? Do you plan to go to college? Collegecollegecollegecollege" so it's foreign to me if family "expects" children, but I suppose it makes sense... sucks though. Maybe when you meet a girl and get close enough to be sleeping with her, throw in a joke about your infertility, but early on enough that she wouldn't blame you for not mentioning it. Adoption is a thing if you do want to start a family!

>> No.9919834

thanks anon. Your reply literally made me tear up a bit (i'm the other sterile here), it feel the same as You when it comes to having to hurt someone I love because I can't give them children. Some days it's haunts me, but like you said, not everyone wants children. Sucks because I like masculine men and it's usually the more masculine types that do want kids in my experience. Plus, I'm a pretty traditional girl... maybe I will meet a man who's wife passed and he has children who would accept me as their mom. Or you know, maybe not having kids is something I can live with. I have all my time and resources for myself and any partner I may or may not have.

>> No.9919839

Lolitas shouldn’t breed

>> No.9919840

They're not begging me for children but they kind of just assume a baby will be on the way by the time I'm in my late 20's early 30's. I was never that keen on kids but I always thought, "Maybe it'll be different if they're mine?" But in a way, it's relieving knowing that I won't have to make that leap of faith anymore.

Adoption is always out there if you really want that motherly role.

To me, to meet girl who would be sterile as well would be such a blessing despite how cruel that sounds. We could just focus on growing together and being in love. If ever the time came we decided we do want children, we wouldn't have to have the debate of a sperm donor (which I personally would feel deeply uncomfortable with) or anything, we could just adopt instead.

>> No.9919841

Just tone it down. I personally think moms in full lolita are cringy, because it's one thing to draw attention to yourself that may be negative without giving a fuck and another thing to drag your vulnerable child into it. But that doesn't mean you have to sell your wardrobe and never have fun again.

>> No.9919844

I like the way you think anon. Maybe it is relieving knowing I will never even have to worry about having children. To be honest, I have never really been sold on the idea. It's a huge change, and a huge chance. But because I don't even have the ability to have any children, then it shouldn't matter and I should instead see all of the opportunities I have now, instead of being sad and longing for what cannot be. Like I said before, I worry more about someone I love not wanting me for being "worthless", but maybe I shouldn't care about someone who loves me for what I can give them/do for them instead. It's going to sound dumb but I knew that already... it just... sometimes it helps to hear it from another perspective somehow. Thanks so much. You really helped a lot tonight.

>> No.9919845

Also wtf anon
>All my funds are going to what's coming
You're supposed to have those funds and a good savings account BEFORE getting pregnant.

>> No.9919851

I'm glad I could help you. The feelings are mutual. I've never talked to another sterile person before.

I think that if someone truly loved me, they will love for what I am and what I can do for them and won't hate me for what I am not and what I can't do. I can't give her motherhood but I can give her all that I am. If that's not enough for her, then even if I could give her children I wouldn't want to be together.

This has been really nice to talk to you.

>> No.9919857

Yes, same, this is how I feel about it too. I would love my partner for them, not what they could or could not do for me/give to me, but somehow it is so unbelievable to my mind that anyone would do/feel the same towards me. I now that I have a lot of love to give, and am very loyal and caring, so despite not being able to give a man children I have so much more. I think it's just hard sometimes, especially since it seems like a lot of people I know see women who don't want children as worthless, and by extension I feel that same sense of unworthiness at times. But you are right, and there is so much more to life that what we can or cannot provide.

Again, thank you so much.

>> No.9919862

If you ever need someone to talk to, I'm usually hanging around in these threads so just make a call out.

>> No.9919865

Savings? That anon hasn’t even been to college. You’re expecting too much.

>> No.9919872

Post email

>> No.9919876

I'm just giggling because if she thought the cutting was too much, boy she is in for a fucking wild ride with the other things I want to do to her.

>> No.9919877

[email protected]

>> No.9919880

My ideal partner would be sterile. As someone who likes sex, doesn't want kids, hates condoms and has seen her friends go through all the bad side effects of hormonal contraception, being with a sterile partner sounds like my idea of heaven.

>> No.9919887

I'm glad there's people out there who like it and would find it ideal.

I think the other sterile anon can definitely agree with me in saying that it makes you feel like less of a human being when you lose that function that is so innately part of living and what you're meant to complete in life. Almost sub-human compared to everyone else. You feel like you're incomplete and broken because everybody has this thing that you don't. It was the one thing you were put on this earth to do and you can't do it. I definitely at times feel like less of a man knowing I can never be a father. I'll never cheer my son on at his sports day carnival, I'll never get to kiss my daughter on the cheek for getting a perfect A on her test, I'll never be able to make my son unbearably uncomfortable giving him a sex talk and I won't be able to scare my daughter's teenage boyfriends to death.

It's also such a stupid boyish type of pride to have a girl panic that she might be pregnant from you and then you freak out with her.

But then I go to the supermarket where there's four kids pulling everything off the shelf, screaming and crying at some poor, ragged, sleep-deprived father and I feel a bit better that the romanticised idea of children I sometimes have in my head isn't the reality.

>> No.9919914

I dislike children but instinctively you become attached to your own? That's what it feels like, but I'm no doctor.

This sterile romance that's come up is so heartwarming. I honestly live for feels thread ships, as strange as it sounds to say.

I don't see where I said I didn't, I do have a savings, one that I'm going to be building it up for the next 18 years - I haven't made enough money to fund two lifetimes just yet, sorry to disappoint. If I didn't have a savings I wouldn't be pregnant, and I wouldn't be a lolita.

>> No.9919924
File: 63 KB, 640x853, 1528327295990.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>Time to iron my blouses
>Inspect iron before use
>Dirtied with spots of red glitter
>Sister is working on one of those Houseki No Kuni gems
>Has opted to use nail polish for more shine
>Somehow ended up on our flatiron
>Tell her about it
>She's in the middle of doing her huge sword
>Fuck it, I'll clean it
>Confirm its nail polish with her
>Clean it thoroughly
>Ironing goes well afterwards

I never thought there'd be a day when I'm rubbing acetone on my flatiron. Even if I love my cosplaying sister to bits I really look forward to moving out.

>> No.9919927


Reading this thread was hard for me as someone who has made a conscious decision to make himself infertile. I never really realized how hard it must be for people who didn't get to make their fertility a choice. At the very least I want to say that guys without a child wish are probably more common than you'd think. I hope so much that you can all find the happiness you want in life. Maybe in the near future there will be a technique to allow you to have a child.

Obviously I don't experience the feeling of worthlessness or being subhuman. And while I understand how you can get the feeling, I wanted to say that as someone who is not expecting children out of a relationship, simply being yourself and being the light of your partner's life is more valuable than anything. I don't think it's my function to procreate in life, but to simply bring happiness to the people I love. Also, poopy diapers are icky so there's that. But I still hope you can all eventually find a way to choose rather than it being decided for you.

>> No.9920001
File: 29 KB, 417x480, 1519715748104.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>pergert gull
>worried she'll have a boy because it makes lolita dress up harder

>> No.9920045
File: 20 KB, 450x635, 1514669022481.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>meets girl at con as a teen, I'm a lolita, was a cosplayer, she's a cosplayer
>she dislikes lolita, doesn't think it suits me, finds it weirdly expensive etc
>relationship only holds a couple of months, finds out afterwards she was cheating
>friend digging around fetlife to see if any comm members are using brand for ddlg
>"hey anon do you know this girl"
>there she is, wearing jfash, posing like... "cutesy but sexy" in front of a clothing rack with brand with captions about ddlg, kittenplay etc
>brand as in not replicas and I can name those prints
>no pink, no jfash, no anything close to the aesthetic anywhere on her other social media, where she's in jeans and hoodies only and sometimes goes under male pronouns
>realizes she only posts jfash on kink sites
>this girl who brought me down for wearing lolita now uses it as kink wear

>> No.9920082

Srs doesn't change how you look. I've been on hrt for a few months. Ffs is face surgery haven't gotten that, would at least wait for hrt to run its course before considering.

>> No.9920093

Yeah, feel similar. But I'm just bored to death because my videocard broke and I have no life outside of my PC. Well I do, but my other hobbies cost money and I have none left.

>> No.9920094

I know this feeling. I always wonder of people have low standards or mine are so high?

>> No.9920096

Learn to tie proper bows on your back after putting the dress on. It's not even that hard...

I will never understand why people do thousands of weird "tricks" to tie their bows, just to end up with a not perfectly shaped one when it's not really harder than tying shoelaces without looking. Just try it a few times, you get a hang of it and will be able to adjust it to perfection as much as you wish to, and it will be perfectly fitted on your body while wearing the dress.

>I fucking hate loose hanging bows because people can't tie them properly after putting things on
>Same hate for badly tied bows in general, or unsymmetrical ones, or whatever problems you can think off

>> No.9920098

It's not a girls or guys things. Many people don't want this. I'm a girl and my BF is the one not wanting it. It's kinda against nature to be masochistic, let alone a specific type of it (in this case knife cuts).

But if you tell her and she freaks out and won't fuck at all, you're either have been telling her the wrong way (coming over too demanding in wanting it now or like a psycho who might hurt her without care), or your girlfriend and you isn't gonna work because this will stay a point of freaking out for her.

Like, my BF doesn't like the idea, but he's not thinking any less of me because of a fetish. Perhaps in the future, perhaps now. We'll see. But if you're not acting different then when she did have sex with you and she can't handle your thoughts (which is not something you can change really, and shouldn't have to keep secret in a long term relationship), it's bound to go wrong sooner or later.

Anyways, consider you end with "girls are such a pussies" you sound like you're a jerk about her feelings. Wouldn't trust you with a knife either to be honest. And trust matters the most.

>> No.9920106

>has seen her friends go through all the bad side effects of hormonal contraception
It can also be opposite. I went from tall, thin plank who can't hold fat anywhere to tall, thin curved woman who can only get fat on breast and butt. I looks a thousands times better, and can still eat whatever I want.

>> No.9920122
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>tfw no cosplay bf to sing musical duets with

>> No.9920177
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>tfw no cosplay gf that makes me play vidya or watch anime we her to choose our next cosplay

>> No.9920180

Hey at least nobody would know you're male if you do wear that burqa.

>> No.9920288

I could follow you around with an accordion while you do all the singing.

>> No.9920335

Ease up there partner. I'm being cynical for the sake of comedy.

>> No.9920372
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>tfw sperglord of a human being born with a decent/good looking face (depending on your preference)
>Have zero real friends because always anxious about social situations
>Zero friends causes depression
>Develop BPD in the last two years and become a proper psycho
>Because of face, get girls approaching me and asking to go on dates
>Reject them always
>Avoid relationships because I don't want to put another human being through my fucking wreck of mental state and I think they have this imaginary 'cool guy' built up in their heads with cool hobbies and cool interests which I'm not
>Only 'friends' I have are internet friends because we share interests in games and anime
>Whenever they see me on camera they always say they're bewildered because I do not look like the type of anime sperglord who has wall scrolls, figurines and bodypillows of his waifus and sits inside all day in the dark playing VNs.
>One friend is really pushing me to go anime conventions which I've always been terrified of because I won't know how to act and I'll just end up as one of the 'convention creeps'
>He says it's the perfect environment for me, especially to meet girls because everyone is at least a little cringy and autistic so it's okay if I'm a little odd
>Warming up to the idea but still freak and back out just before buying the tickets

I'm still a little worried. I want to verify with you gulls, are these places really autism safe spaces? I know obviously that social norms like personal space etc are to be respected but I'm more just extremely shy and really awkward but I really want to make friends. Are people willing to accept that sort of behaviour and take me under their wing if it's obvious I just want to meet people with similar interests? My friend is a habitual congoer and does cosplay with his girlfriend and he builds up cons like they're a gift from God for people like me. I really want to grow into my face and use it to my advantage, I'm just completely retarded.

>> No.9920383

They are indeed tism safe spaces
Who knows anon, maybe you'll meet a really pretty but mental gull and you'll deserve each other

>> No.9920390
File: 53 KB, 933x922, 1527710984430.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

You probably have SAD (social anxiety).
You should try finding a kind-hearted and normal person that will understand you have very poor social skills and anxiety.
Two crazy people means a bad end and bad times.

>figurines and bodypillows of his waifus and sits inside all day in the dark playing VNs
You are using your waifus as a surrogate for your lack of emotional intimacy. You will likely fall back on these once you have a problem in a relationship and end up back in square one since you don't understand how to properly confront them. You should try to ditch this "escapism" sooner rather than later if you want to have a real partner.

>they have this imaginary 'cool guy' built up in their heads with cool hobbies and cool interests which I'm not
"Cool" is relative, although you should probably find something you're passionate about to pursue instead of just passive activities.

>builds up cons like they're a gift from God for people like me
They are. If you're even modestly attractive you have good chances of being approached by somebody.

>> No.9920396

Saying something like 'Hey, I really like your coordinate!" is a good icebreaker, it's benign and demonstrates that you know something about the fashion.

>> No.9920398

I don't want to drag an innocent girl through my clusterfuck of a head. I mean, if it's by her own volition that she finds nutcases attractive that's fine but I don't want someone who's attracted to me because they only want to fix me because I will bleed them dry. I feel because I am incredibly shy and scared when I first meet people they underestimate just how much of a psycho I can be and they might be attracted to me under false ideas.

I think the waifu stuff is definitely a surrogate but it's also kind of funny to me. It's half ironic, half unironic. I couldn't ditch anime though. That's such a huge part of my life that I love. But I think you are right. A kind-hearted and normal person who's just very understanding would be very nice, but I don't feel like I'd be giving her anything back. It'd just be me taking and taking until there's nothing left. That wouldn't be fair.

But I'm glad I'm getting confirmation that cons might be my saving grace.

Thank you for your words though, I really appreciate it.

>> No.9920401

Just be up front and honest with any girls you meet (potentially at a con). My boyfriend has BPD and I appreciate that he's never tried to hide it from me, is honest about when he's changing meds or in weird mood. That way you won't feel guilty about pretending to be something you're not, and if you and a girl hit it off you'll feel better knowing that she knows what she's getting into.

I know it sounds cliche but, give it a shot at a con and just be yourself.

>> No.9920404

Like, tell her straight away I have BPD and severe anxiety? Is that normal? I'd be moderately freaked out if someone opened with "I have anorexia." or something similar and just think this person is a bit weird.

Don't you feel drained from dating someone with BPD? I don't know how your boyfriend is but I'm insanely jealous and obsessive and will go to extremes to make sure my love isn't being threatened. I'm attention seeking and manipulative. Whenever I'm in love I get very clingy, dependent and don't want to ever be separated. Among others things which I won't specify out of decency. Of course I'm not like that all the time but it's certainly a rollercoaster.

I don't know how someone could ever tolerate let alone love a person like that. Especially not a man who's meant to be the more emotionally stable one. How do you do it?

>> No.9920406

Not right away but maybe within a few weeks.

>> No.9920409

>I don't want to drag an innocent girl through my clusterfuck of a head
I wish I didn't have so much firsthand experience of being in your position, but when you are completely socially inept, and have some degree of psychopathy relationships are very difficult. You will most likely end up being an abuser, or being abused yourself. If one single person controls the entirety of their partners social and emotional life, it will be difficult to have a balanced relationship where compromises can be made. You should really try making friends before finding an intimate partner, and be cautious of people who try to prevent you from doing that.

>Like, tell her straight away I have BPD and severe anxiety?
No. Don't do this. They have to be somewhat committed to helping you (emotionally attached) before they will attempt to work around your issues. It might work for girls to be upfront about it, but it will most likely not work for you. Anyone with even basic social skills will know soon enough if you're spending time with them. Let them confront you about it.

>> No.9920410

How the fuck do people make lasting friendships at cons, especially as adults? I'm good at chit chatting and even sharing social media and sending little follow ups after the con, but real friendships never seem to come from this, and I'm so envious of people who can make more than con friends at cons.

>> No.9920413

>Like, tell her straight away I have BPD and severe anxiety?

Like, after a few date and you realize you're clicking and could potentially pursue a relationship.

And I'm AYRT - jealously and manipulative doesn't really come into play because I'm a loner weeb with no friends. I guess I'm perfect for an obsessive guy since there is literally no one around me to be jealous about.

>> No.9920425

I'm not specifically looking for a girlfriend, I want to make that clear. I just want to make some sort of real life social connections.

>You will most likely end up being an abuser, or being abused yourself
I hope not. I don't think I'm capable of being abusive with how I am, maybe just very manipulative and confusing. I get very large mood swings where sometimes I just want to be a baby, be taken care of, have my hair stroked and told everything is okay and then I get the opposite end where I want to be in control, guide the person totally and have them admire me. It's really a coin-toss on the day on which one it'll be, sometimes I'll get both.

I'm sure you can understand when I say it really screws with your own self-identity.

>Let them confront you about it.
So eventually they'll notice somethings not quite right with me and they'll ask?

>I'm perfect for an obsessive guy since there is literally no one around me to be jealous about.
Ahh, be careful what you wish for. I've only sworn off dating for a year but in the year before that I the symptoms really started to hit and I wasn't entirely sure what was happening I would tell girls I just want to around them 24/7 and always be with them. The idea of a yandere boyfriend sounds really nice until the reality hits.

For example this is something fairly tame: I really, really like any sort of physically affection and I get quite upset if I can't touch my partner in some way if I'm with them so I would always be within arms reach and have my hand resting on them in some way. I would get pretty emotional if for whatever reason we had to be separated. It just made me feel more secure and calmed my anxiety to touch them but it really, really annoys people after a while. They feel suffocated. Like with my previous girlfriend I would follow her into changing rooms when we go shopping and would be on the verge of crying and panic if she had to go to the bathroom and I wasn't allowed to be there.

>> No.9920427

>I don't think I'm capable of being abusive with how I am
> I get quite upset if I can't touch my partner in some way if I'm with them so I would always be within arms reach and have my hand resting on them in some way. I would get pretty emotional if for whatever reason we had to be separated.
>with my previous girlfriend I would follow her into changing rooms when we go shopping and would be on the verge of crying and panic
Anon you are exactly the type of person that will end up as an abuser or abused.
You just might not realize it until you've already crossed the line for what's acceptable. Once they start crying you've already fucked up anon.

>> No.9920429

Maybe we just have different definitions of abuse. I'm definitely obsessive but abusive is something I'm not comfortable with. I would absolutely hate for someone else, especially my partner, to feel abused or hurt by me. I know I'm exhausting and I suffocate others but I would hate myself if someone felt abused by me.

I'm not sure if it's a misinterpretation but in that situation I'm the one who's crying and panicking. Not her.

>> No.9920437

emotional manipulation is abuse, and sadly a lot of BPD people are pretty manipulative emotionally because of their issues. Which is probably what the other anon means.

>> No.9920438

Obsessive is part of it sure, but the abuse comes from that whole "manipulation" thing.
Don't worry anon, you're probably better than you think you are. Self awareness goes a long way.

>> No.9920444

You don't seem to understand that showing your discomfort and obsession over trivial matters is easily turned into manipulation. It's also that you say things like
>then I get the opposite end where I want to be in control
Intense and unhinged feelings can make you do some pretty awful things in the heat of the moment, especially when you also don't even think you're capable of abusing someone. Your intentions are not as easily conveyed as your actions, and it's clear you have difficulty understanding what's acceptable or appropriate. Put the two together and you won't even realize when you're genuinely hurting someone.

>> No.9920452

Mmm, that's true. I'm not happy about what I do that's why I've stopped dating. The manipulation just comes from an extreme fear that they're going to leave me. I don't degrade them or humiliate them. I just try to engineer their feelings and the surrounding circumstances to make her spend more time with me.

For example, if I knew she was going to go out with friends the few days leading up the event I would purposefully be incredibly sweet, make her favourite foods, clean the house, buy flowers, get her favourite coffee, be very, very affectionate (which I didn't mind at all, it made me really happy to do all these nice things for her) and I would talk about her exams and how much work she has to do and how stressful it all is and how she should just get it out of the way and done. All to just to convince her that her doubts about going out are correct and she shouldn't go. I don't know if that's abuse or just a affectionate and playful but clingy partner. I know in a previous relationship beforeall of this and I was the one going out my partner would get pouty and coax me with cuddles and sex to stay home. Which I thought was cute and endearing.

What's that point where it crosses into emotional manipulation leading to abuse?

I really have issues with this. Just because someone is emotionally unstable doesn't mean that they can't differentiate an act which is totally wrong from one that is not. I'm able to tell what is real and what is not. I am able to tell what is wrong and what is not. I'm not retarded. I would never do something in the heat of the moment which could be abusive. I would never do something with the intention of malice or to cause fear in someone to get what I wanted. I hate the idea of hurting others.

>> No.9920462

>Just because someone is emotionally unstable doesn't mean that they can't differentiate an act which is totally wrong from one that is not.
That's what I'm also saying anon, your emotional swings have no relevance to how your partner feels. The intentions of your actions do not matter, and what you think is right or wrong does not matter. You can feel like you are doing the right thing, all the while you are hurting someone. It is your social ineptitude, your feelings of dependence, and obsession for them that puts you at risk of abusing. Your continued denial of even the possibility that you could be abusive is even more concerning. You are not a helpless puppy without the means to harm someone mentally or physically. You are a grown man who is self confessing their status as a "fucking wreck of a mental state" to strangers on the internet. You do not have to want to hurt someone in order to hurt them. If you felt like you were as completely in control of your intense emotions, you wouldn't think to mention them like you have. I'm not telling you that you will always hurt someone, just that it is a real possibility you need to be aware of.

>> No.9920466

That would go for absolutely everybody though? We can't read other people's mind but we still do our best to act in a way that is mutually beneficial. Sometimes that decision to act was wrong and you end up hurting people. Sometimes it's right. Simply because someone is mentally ill doesn't make them stop being human or thinking like one. I'm still a real person with a real personality, I'm not just a walking ball of mental issues, I still feel empathy, guilt and embarrassment.

>If you felt like you were as completely in control of your intense emotions, you wouldn't think to mention them like you have
I just mention them because it's a pertinent part of what I am and why I am this way. You're the one who stepped outside of the scope of the discussion and mentioned I could become an abuser or become abused.

Look. I apologise for becoming so emotional. I just feel strongly about people placing labels onto people with mental illness, especially unsavoury labels like abuser or victim, as if that's all that person is like they don't have their own personality and moral compass. Like they're just a rabid animal who only operates on lower order thinking to achieve primal goals.

>> No.9920471

>That would go for absolutely everybody though?
You have difficulty understanding other people, don't you?
How can you be so socially reclusive, call yourself autistic, and then attempt to argue that you clearly understand the best way to act towards someone close to you?
It doesn't make sense, and I'm telling you this is a problem you need to address.
It's like Breivik, a guy who went and massacred an island full of children, and when brought to a courtroom he asked when the ceremony for saving the country would be.
You have a problem, and just repeating "Well I guess I'll just do my best!" is not the solution.

>> No.9920475

You've refused to acknowledge the steps I've taken to avoid hurting others, kept calling me abusive and now you're comparing me to a mass murderer of children.

Fuck off.

>> No.9920476

As someone with BPD I can confirm that we have the potential to manipulate people. I used to be a crazy overly jealous and possessive bitch but after being diagnosed and properly medicated those thoughts went away and I became a better partner.

>> No.9920478
File: 394 KB, 598x564, 1528287065378.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>S-s-shut up anon! I already told you I could never ever hurt anyone uwu...

>> No.9920485

It's time to stop responding to bait BPD anon.

>> No.9920505

Ive gone to some local events but do people here unironically buy a plane ticket and stay in a hotel just for a con? Why?
How could one justify doing that? I can only assume that anyone who does that either has rich parents or is 30+

>> No.9920521

Not sure if this should be in feels but here’s some salt. So my comms old mod is moving and had to choose someone else to be mod for our comm. someone literally bribed her to be a mod and now she’s the mod. I didn’t think mod status was that important.. We aren’t even a big comm

>> No.9920533

I'm sorta similar in that I'm a fucking weirdo, but people seem to like my personality more than I do and girls find me attractive. As I was reading your post it dawned on me that since finally facing the consequences of not consenting to my first time I'd been using it as reason to allow myself to give up, roll over, and die. I'll be discussing this with my therapist come sunday.
Your misery was my pick me up; I hope you feel better soon.

>> No.9920544

If you really like going to cons and you have money to spend, why not?

>> No.9920552

I mean that just seems so expencive, both in money and time prohibitively so if you are anything other than wealthy with flexible hours, or leeching off someone.

>> No.9920553

>flexible hours
Cons are usually on weekends though... and taking off one or two extra days for travel/Friday isn't a big deal.

>> No.9920564

>tfw eternal wagecuck who will only get to "have fun" at retirement age and resent teens at conventions for getting to have carefree excitement just because they actually had friends who could go with them
Life is suffering.

>> No.9920567

California comm?

>> No.9920571
File: 7 KB, 216x146, crievertim.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>make plans to go on a cute fun date in lolita with SO
>really looking forward to it
>night before the date
>we have a minor disagreement
>SO gets really mad
>starts yelling, telling me that i'm going nowhere, that i'm not trying hard enough, and that all of my goals are meaningless and stupid (despite me working and going to school and having normal life goals like everybody else)
>start crying
>yells more
>tfw i realize this isn't the first time something like this has happened with him
>tfw i realize he's projecting his insecurities onto me
>tfw heart is broken, probably need to part ways with SO, and no lolita date with bonus handholding

i called my sister crying and she said she'll take me out instead, which means a lot but my heart still hurts

>> No.9920572

sterile-fem-anon-from-up-above here, thanks for this message. it's hard sometimes, but I do agree with you in that bringing happiness to people is most important to me. I just hope someday I find a partner who won't see me as being worthless and broken.

>> No.9920573

Yep! I'm the anon you replied to, and I have been diagnosed with BPD. It's been hard for me to get past my impulsive manipulative stuff, but with work it can happen. The worst is people who use their BPD (or any mental illness/personality disorder/trauma) as an excuse to be a manipulative, horrid piece of shit to another human. As long as we're aware and work to overcome it and take control of our actions and be responsible, it's possible to be a decent human being despite our issues.

>> No.9920574

I'm sorry anon. I don't know what your partner is going through but it must be rough for both of you... either way, he shouldn't be treating you like shit because he's insecure about his own life. don't let people treat you like shit. i know it sucks, but if this keeps happening, you really should probably move on.

>> No.9920577

NAYRT but I have a friend who was diagnosed with BDP when he was a teenager. Loves telling us he has BDP but does sweet fuck all to try to work through those issues. It's infuriating.

>> No.9920578

guy here
> lost weight a long time a go.
> recently got gf
> really love her
> she cosplays and is really good at it
> do a lot of cons together
might sound like an asshole, but she a little overweight. while nog bad, she has like kankles and it annoys the shit out of me.
seems like she is not eating healthy or working out.
and other girls seems to become more and more attractive.
I am just broken?

>> No.9920581

humblebragging showoff. kys

>> No.9920582

sorry you're fat

>> No.9920586

yeah people like that are horrible. we all have issues, but they are not excuses to treat other people like shit. I can't stand people that use their issues as excuses for not taking responsibility for their actions.

>> No.9920588

can you work out with her? like, encourage her to work out with you? People grow and change and no matter how much you love someone sometimes the distance between you becomes so much that there isn't a bridge to close the gap. People need to grow together (or be stagnant together, if that's the case) but if not, then no amount of love will close the gap. If she refuses to work on herself, even out of love and health, and that is important to you, then maybe you guys should look elsewhere. Please try to fix it before it's too late though.

>> No.9920589

It bugs me so much. If you're self aware enough to know your behaviour is being caused by a mental disorder, you're self aware enough to fix your goddamn self.

>> No.9920590

>tfw you spend 90% of your money on drinking and can't afford cons anymore

>> No.9920593

sorry you're an ana-chan in denial

>> No.9920617


It's kind of classic BPD behaviour. Mental illness gets you a lot of sympathy these days and BPD people are attention seekers. So there's no surprises.

>> No.9920621

Cool story bro

>> No.9920634
File: 681 KB, 1000x1000, 1360302119068.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

You're right.
>tfw just got VIP tickets for Miku Expo

I hope they are. When I typed vocaloid into youtube I didn't know 60% of the songs that appeared.

>tfw same
Let's start the "hello, fellow kids" club.
But there is some amazing new stuff out there too. I checked some of my favorite producers (that didn't stop or died) and they only got better.

>> No.9920642

Hell no anon. Keep dressing how you love and do your thing. From my perspective, as the child of a mom who is really not traditional and does the things she enjoys, it makes me happy and proud of her. Be good to yourself and good to your child, not one of those lame "I gave up all the things that made my life fun and cool when I had you" moms. Be a brave mom and raise a brave child. Best of luck to you anon <3.

>> No.9920646

Nayrt, I think you have codependency issues that you should get taken care of asap talk to your therapist about it. You're describing me to a t and I lost all of my friends because i spiraled and tried killing myself. The long term abandonment sucks more if you don't get the codepency taken care of

>> No.9920678

To be fair the behaviors caused by personality disorders like BPD can take years of therapy to treat even if the person in question is aware that they have a problem and they seek help and try to prevent aforementioned behaviors

>> No.9920679

But he doesn't seek help. It only ever comes up in context as 'but muh BPD' when he wants to be a special snowflake and show people how messed up he is, and to excuse his behaviours when he's acting like a twat.

>> No.9920680

>female friends get excited about stuff or ask me deep questions about my life or give me hugs
>aww that's so sweet, i love them
>guy friends do the same thing
>jesus h christ, calm down, this is scary
i wish i could be less scared of men in general and stop assuming the worst of them. one of the reasons all my friends are lolitas is because it keeps me away from men. i know most men are decent people but i'm so irrationally scared of them.

>> No.9920681

It's like any vacation. Just budget accordingly.

If you're going solo it might be expensive. But the cost of a room across 4-6 people makes it easier on the wallet. You might spend more on food, but again, it's just like any vacation.

>> No.9920685

This makes me sad because I'm on the opposite end of this. I adore hugs but I always feel like I might be overstepping boundaries and get reported for sexual assault if I initiate a hug and I think asking for a hug is just even weirder.

Why do you think you're scared?

>> No.9920688

I've been cosplaying for 7 years, but I'm barely above the level I started at. Meanwhile, the friend I started going to cons with has entered competitions and won best in shows. I'm not trying to invalidate her
hard work, but it's frustrating that I haven't improved.

Last con we attended, we cosplayed from the same series (kinda by accident), and I thought it would be fun to walk around. Twice she told me to go on ahead or not wait for her, and I couldn't help but think it was because I would shame her by being around.

>> No.9920690

i don't know, i've never actually been hurt by a guy but i'm scared that they'll get angry and do something weird. not like sexual assault but like something weird and unpredictable. i think it's also because they're so much bigger and stronger and i don't trust what they want from me like being near a big animal like a horse

>> No.9920700

In a way that's sort of cute, I guess? I understand why you might be afraid but 99.99% of guys would rather protect you than hurt you.

I do this without noticing but I soften my voice and change my body language when I'm talking to a girl since I don't know, there's no need for me to be in some psuedo-dick measuring competition with a girl like guys do to each other I guess.

Have you ever just been alone with a guy before and seen them soften up? I think that'd change your perspective a lot. A lot of guys find it exhausting to keep up their masculinity in public and it's really nice to just settle down into a girls lap when you're alone and let her lightly touch traces your face with her tiny hands and take care of you as she lightly hums. I think maybe you could benefit from that, seeing a guy being vulnerable and totally at ease.

Are you attracted to men sexually? Maybe you just find what most girls see as attractive, manly qualities as scary because you're not attracted to them. Or you just like feminine guys perhaps?

>> No.9920984

How do I get people to travel and board with me?

>> No.9920993

NAYRT, but were you the anon who was afraid of overstepping boundaries and being weird by asking for hugs? Because this post comes off as pretty creepy just fyi.

>> No.9920997

Ask your friends, hey I wanna go to a con
would you be interested.

You can also try to room with people that need more bodies (to lessen room costs), but then you open yourself to the possibility of a horror story.

>> No.9920998
File: 301 KB, 1680x1050, 93DAA1BF-045A-47D5-BAA2-4E9ABE792771.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>Cosplay magical girl from a newer anime
>Disregard all of my previous cosplays, this is my new favorite cosplay
>Fiercly protective of this character
>As the show gets more popular, more people start cosplaying the same character
>Seeing other people do the same character makes my blood fucking boil. Especially when their cosplays are better than mine in ways that I can’t control (they have more attractive faces, they’re closer to an accurate character height)
>Earlier today a friend shared an article about the show, and I secretly got really mad because the article featured a cosplayer that wasn’t me.

Fuuuck, I don’t like this side of myself at all. I usually don’t care when people cosplay the same character as me. Is there some phenomenon about cosplaying main character magical girls that brings out the inner raging bitch in people?

>> No.9921010

Nah, you're just a jealous person.

>> No.9921011

>Using fetlife to out people
Fuck you, seriously.

>> No.9921013


>> No.9921017

NAYRT but of course it's creepy, it's well within the accepted bounds for a question on 4chan though I think

>> No.9921019

Yeah more or less
This is the equivalent of watching someone newer than you in a competitive game getting a higher rank

>> No.9921030

I don't have friends.
How do I find people looking to split costs for con hotels?

>> No.9921040
File: 22 KB, 236x471, 7898.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

thanks for weighing in anon! i'm lucky to have great friends as a support system and after talking about it with a few of them the consensus is that i leave his ass. i don't think very highly of myself so his words really stung, but i'll believe my friends over that guy any day.

also the lolita "date" with my sister was fun and i'm glad i hung out with her instead

>> No.9921042

Get wrecked, thot.

>> No.9921046

I haven't had to do it personally, but if you go to the forum of the con you might be able to find people that are looking for someone in the room.

Again, not something I've done, but maybe someone here can share their experience.

>> No.9921056

I'm that anon.
Ever had a long term partner?

>> No.9921057

Good! I'm glad! and I'm happy to have randomly seen this just now as well. Be strong and remember that you deserve someone who isn't going to turn on you every time they have some stress in their life, someone who will turn to you for love and support and comfort instead. Stay strong anon!

>> No.9921195
File: 759 KB, 965x965, 7b1310a0-a345-4fba-ba76-95b9c4acf178.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

tfw trap cosplayers look more feminine than you and you already have hardcore body dysphoria

>> No.9921658


If you have body dysphoria as a girl don't you want to look less feminine?

>> No.9921669
File: 312 KB, 1920x1080, wheyfus.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

wheyfu is the patrician choice
I'm happy you're doing well anon

>> No.9922082

I also have an account there though and haven't outed her - unless complaining in the feels thread counts as outing, while my friend just wanted to know who to not buy stained items from

>> No.9922091

it's dysmorphia you retarded larper

>> No.9922093
File: 89 KB, 569x675, 1527013942559.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

I was so excited when Wowaka came back to do an anniversary song for Miku. Hachi as well, and it was even better to hear him do a cover of Sand Planet on his newest album. I've actually noticed a lot of my favorite old Vocaloid artists and cover singers have grown out into singing their own songs. I'm happy for them, actually. I've been following Hachi for so long, it was amazing seeing him gradually gain more and more popularity to the point where "Lemon" is being covered by every normie Japanese youtuber and their grandmothers.

>> No.9922096

Get a streamer, Anon. I don't know why they aren't more commonplace in households. They're so much better than irons.
>Harder to burn your clothes because you're not pressing hot metal against them
>Harder to "sear in" creases from not properly flattening out because your garment is hanging
>Easier to iron clothes with lots of pleats, ruffles, and small details because you're just hovering steam over it rather than trying to press down on it
>Has the benefit of slightly deodorizing, just in case anything weird latched onto it that you don't notice yourself

You can get a cheap one for the same price as an iron.

>> No.9922510

Just don't if you don't want to. You're an adult, not a high schooler anymore.

>> No.9922563

I'm also BPD, and it's a VERY common trait for us to be abusive - the obsessive nature you mentioned is definitely abusive. Whether intentional or not, you're suffocating your partner with pressure to be your emotional power supply and if they don't divert 100% of their attention to you, you will be unconsciously punishing them. I think for most BPD girls specifically, it's usually subconscious, but I think you're definitely in a position where you should be cautious. It can still work but only once you accept what you have to work with. Consciously stop doing the manipulative tactics that come to you naturally.

This is probably the realest advice I've ever given on /cgl/, this took me years to realize.

>> No.9922583

AYRT I was in a downward spiral before medication. I’m of Mexican descent so my parents didn’t believe in the idea of mental illness. It wasn’t until I was hospitalized a second time for a suicide attempt for them to realize that their daughter was crying out for help. I look back at all the times I was flat out batshit insane and emotionally manipulative and am thoroughly embarrassed. I never want to see that side of me ever again.

>> No.9922965
File: 154 KB, 1000x650, south.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>Moved from the NJ to VA
>Only thing I miss is all the cons

What cons are worth going to if you're in Virginia? Preferably south of Virginia since I've already been to the ones north of it.

>> No.9923010

I've come to realize that so many people I thought I was at least friendly acquaintances with don't care about me at all. One guy I have known for four years did not only know my name but was vaguely offended I even expected him to know it. I feel like outside of a few people I see at meet ups I have no real friends.

>> No.9923037

Don't worry you're just overly empathetic, it happens.
Be glad that you have a few people you can really count on as friends, and that you discovered that those other people weren't your true friends before you actually needed to rely on them for something.

>> No.9923070

>if you know you're sad because of depression, you're self aware enough to fix it

>> No.9923073

I have 5 weeks to lose 12lbs and be 8% ish bodyfat, i dont think I can survive living off of 1400 calories a day, at least not when working.

>> No.9923080

Unironically do fasting
You stop feeling hungry on day 2

>> No.9923900

Keep your electrolytes up though

Check /fit/

>> No.9924190

nayrt but lately I've been feeling this a lot

>> No.9924194
File: 256 KB, 1000x1502, 1451938093016.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

Ever took a step back and felt like you don't even know what you're going with your hobby anymore? Like you tried so hard, and gone so far, but in the end it doesn't even matter.

>> No.9924773

It's the same thing then. You'll be ok Anon

>> No.9925148

I lost all but one of my friends today.
All because of myself.

Just going to toss the group costume in the trash, then join it in there.

>> No.9925159
File: 110 KB, 245x368, glamscure-chaos.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

You will never get one if you genuinely think visual kei is dying.

>> No.9925206

Do you want to rant?

If you worked hard on the costume you shouldn't toss it. Put it away until the emotions aren't so raw.

>> No.9925238

I just made the naive assumption that my friends and I had an understanding.
That they understood my humor and how I acted.
It had been brought up in the past that there was an issue with a specific joke, that I had intentionally attempted to avoid. Not to say I didn't pushed the envelope around it, but I avoid the heart. It hadn't been brought up for a while, so I thought it was fine.
It came down to a giant ultimatum that amounted to I'm a monster and I'm causing the head of the joke non-stop undue stress. She organized us at the start (and the birth of the friendship). Most of the group were her friends to start and became mine after. So everyone sides with her as I'm delivered an ultimatum to "make changes".
I just don't see a point. Its literally be yourself or be around us. In advance, I realize Im being a child. I should just adjust and move on.

Im not going to trash the costume. I sunk way too much time into it. Might just try to sell it after.

>> No.9925243

>your friends avoid bringing up an issue despite you being an autist
they're the ones at fault. not communicating your problems and gossiping instead is an extremely childish thing to do

>> No.9925262

Thanks anon
Better to be right and alone then just alone.

>> No.9926060

I put in extra pounds after a con and now I'm stressing. Most of the face went to my face. I went back to working out again. Is there a reason why? How do I get rid of it ASAP?

>> No.9926063

count calories

>> No.9926066

Fast every other day and cut out sodium

>> No.9926068

Thanks. It's so weird having everything looking skinny but my face.

>> No.9926200

>at a con
>cute girl approaches me and we hit it off
>she says she needs to get something from her hotel room but she doesn't want to walk alone
>I know this is code for "We're fucking."
>Get to her hotel room
>Get to the fucking
>She's on top of me
>Pyscho bitch pulls out a knife (I have no idea where she got it from, we were both naked on an empty bed)
>She cuts my fucking leg
>She looks at me
>Perplexed that I'm not freaking out "Doesn't that hurt?"
>Jokes on her because I'm into being cut
>Take the knife and cut her leg for her
>Proceed to have the best fucking sex of my life because the kink cards are already on the table
>Tell her she has to clean up the mess she made with her mouth
>Licks up my blood
>I lick up hers

I fucking love conventions. Hopefully I don't get aids.

>> No.9926214

I hate cons because of degenerates like you.

>> No.9926222

t. ugly

>> No.9926284

t. HIV positive

>> No.9926295

Enjoy your AIDS from fucking that conslut

>> No.9926297

I fucked up my budgeting for this week and so now I have to cancel a commitment with a friend and I'm having massive anxiety over which friend I cancel with - an old friend I haven't seen in ages or a new friend. I'm not sure which will make me look worse or be more awkward....

>> No.9926299

Cancel with new friend, you haven't seen old friend in a long time. But make sure you reschedule with new friend

>> No.9926415

With pleasure.

>> No.9926433

that happened.
What kind of psycho would do weird bloodplay shit without asking first jesus.

>> No.9926468

I was pleasantly surprised. I fucking love psycho girls. We've been messaging each other for a bit after and I'm in love with this girl.

>> No.9926561

Another guy here... NO. Physical attraction is important. It's not everything but honestly if you don't feel like you want to straight up die for this girl you can probably do better. Don't stick with a relationship that is half-assed because you don't find her attractive.

I was in a relationship with a girl like that for a while. I was open about things. She later ended up kinda out of nowhere leaving me, which is fine because we were FWB at that point.

Christ, just bring a friend and pay attention to your drink.

>> No.9926653

Fair enough dude, be careful

>> No.9926795

ok kind of late for a reply but how about you just tell her you are into sexual denial and your masterplan worked out gloriously?
hey if you have luck she just goes against anything you say and then lead to a more favorable position than before, eh?

>> No.9927025

that feel when all cosplay/weeb girls are whores

>> No.9927050

Finally gonna kill myself tonight gulls

>> No.9927056

please don;t

>> No.9927063

post results

>> No.9927069 [DELETED] 

tfw gropey is ur secret celebrity crush

>> No.9927146

Wrong thread, pal

>> No.9927163

I want her to fucking kick me in the face and I'll punch her in the stomach.

>> No.9927165
File: 493 KB, 496x279, 1391203998831.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>Lady Sloth's second bat dress reservation is out
>size s is 92cm
>be 5ft tall

How does it even translate with poor? I don't buy lolita often because I'm poor.

>> No.9927166

Fuck, I mean *poof.

>> No.9927196

If you feel like the relationship is worth saving, you don’t have to part ways. Check into some therapy sessions together or even by yourselves and see how that goes for a while. If nothing improves, then fuck it, at least you did what you could.

>> No.9927205
File: 16 KB, 205x223, IMG_6165.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

Tfw no rich hottie weeb to sweep me off my feet and spoil me in constant attention, figs, and burando

>> No.9927225

>Dream dress shows up in auction
>Really good condition, decent price
>Money is not a problem since I have a really well paying job anyway
>But currently too big for the dress measurements

Gulls, what would you do if you were me? Should I wait until I lose weight to buy the dress? Or should I just get it now because there's no guarantee it'll show up again for a while and use it as motivation to lose weight?

>> No.9927238

Motivation as fuck, if you don't think you'll see it again but it and lose the weight for it. Unless it's an unreasonable goal (ie 50+ lbs, especially if most of your wardrobe fits your current weight)

>> No.9927243

I'm about 128~130 now and I'm hoping to get down to like 110-115 or so. I have a job that requires me to basically sit all day so I haven't been exercising properly for years now. I'm a little terrified of buying the dress and never being able to lose the weight/keep it off though.

>> No.9927250

Get it and if you slack on it sell it. I don't see any harm in buying it at all c:

>> No.9927339
File: 716 KB, 572x576, 1506136383508.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>anon gets his bloodplay girl
>I still haven't been punched in the face and ribs by a qt

>> No.9927544

You can get a custom size.

>> No.9927592
File: 41 KB, 480x369, IMG_3271.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

Fuck u, I want a boy to cut up and order me around

>> No.9928046
File: 201 KB, 1186x791, messi.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]


>live in a latino country
>and in a small city
>cosplay wasn't a thing during my teens
>too chicken to wear a costume
>too ashamed because I'm fat
>now cosplay is finally common and thus acceptable
>and I'm no longer fat
>tfw I'm fucking 30 and they'll think I'm a weirdo at best and a pedo at worst

>> No.9928079

I thought this kind of stuff happens all the time with underaged people at cons? Sort of infamously? What exactly is changing? You can still just not drink.

>> No.9928087

>you HAVE to get pressured into doing things you don't want if you are a highschooler

>> No.9929995

Do it anyway.

>> No.9930025

>>she says she needs to get something from her hotel room but she doesn't want to walk alone
>>I know this is code for "We're fucking."

It is? How come no one's ever told me this before? To think on all the times I've missed out.

What else is code for "let's fuck"?

>> No.9930478

If you live near me I'll let you cut me and tell you you're worthless and you dress like a cheap whore, provided we can exchange hitting each other in the face and ribs.

Then we can get milkshakes after and I'll want to brush your hair.

>> No.9931973

>tfw not enough time to put together anything decent for AX

>tfw I'm fucking 30 and they'll think I'm a weirdo at best and a pedo at worst

also this. I've got more weight to cut weight though, still can't see abs.

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