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Old one is in autosage! >9628010
why can I never link threads aaaah. But anyway, how would everyone feel about a lifestyle lolita facebook group?I hosted a panel on lifestyle lolita and Rufflecon and suggested the idea, and there was definitely some interest.I wanted to post in Rufflechat asking for name suggestions, but the mod I messaged for permission never got back to me (it's been two and a half days haha. I should just message another mod, I think)But, yes, are you interested? Name suggestions? I almost wanted to do something with "quaintrelle", like the old livejournal group, but I think I want something fresh.
>>9695738i was going to suggest discord but i realize now that having identities connected to it would probably be for the best... that way there's no roleplayers or robots.sounds like an okay idea to me, i wanna talk about cute lifestyle stuff with other people! especially in regard to DIY and lifestyle-y handiwork. i don't enjoy facebook but for the sake of connecting with other lifestylers i'd make an exception.
>>9695744Same, I really dislike the Facebook interface but I would put up with it for nice lolita lifestyle discussion.
>>9695754Why not go back to LJ?
>>9695738Please not Facebook anon. I'd love to join, but I don't have an account there.
>>9695744I personally really dislike discord, so I'm unlikely to start anything there, haha. And most of the irl friends in my comm who were interested in joining don't use discord. >>9695756It would be next to impossible to get any sort of cohesive group together. It makes more sense to use a platform that people are already using.>>9695758What would you suggest, then? Other than discord, for the reasons stated above. I honestly don't know of any other platforms that would make sense to use, but I'm open to suggestions!Again, I'd love suggestions for a name, too, if anyone can think of anything. Even key words would be good.
>>9695756Livejournal is broken as fuck and has been for years.
>>9695756There’s just nobody left on livejournal. On Facebook it has a decent chance of taking off and staying active. Well, I hope so at least.
>>9695777As the future creator and admin, I have some plans in mind to keep it active as much as possible. I just hope there's enough members and interest to keep it going, but I will do my best!
>>9695762I just hate Facebook and have like no presence on social media because I tend to be pretty private as far as the internet goes- my one exception being the old EGL community back in the day. Mostly I just use Skype and Discord for keeping in touch with people now.
>>9695762>What would you suggest, then?I'm kind of thinking a forum that we could use something like Tapatalk, but I'm still researching what would really be the best option. Hold that thought...
>>9695821I don't know that it'd be the best option, but the idea of a subreddit crossed my mind.
>>9695825There was a subreddit for just cgl but I think it's pretty dead. It's definitely not the best method desu.
>>9695825I mean, everyone is free to piggyback off of my idea and make their own forums anywhere they want (like discord or reddit or whatever) but I personally am not going to use reddit because I find its interface hellish.>>9695821I've never heard of Tapatalk, and I feel like half of the point of making a community / group page is to get a lot of people gathered together. If we use a website / forum that people aren't already using, it'll be more inconvenient to use than it's worth for most people, and it'll die out quickly. I think it's important to use a website that people are already using.
>>9695842>it'll be more inconvenient to use than it's worth for most people, and it'll die out quickly. I think it's important to use a website that people are already using.I don't think so though. I think ease of use is what we're looking for. Most people hate that the online community is on Facebook and there is nothing else that people already use that's suited for such a thing. Tapatalk is only an app for making web forums easy to use on a mobile device.But I'm still brainstorming anon, it was merely my first thought.
>>9695842> I think it's important to use a website that people are already using.There have been a few people in this thread already that have said they don't use Facebook, though. I think at this point your best bet, OP, would either be to just say that since you're making the group that you want to use Facebook- which is your right, as you are making it- or just put up a poll once we aggregate a bunch of options to see what everyone's using or likes to get a feel for what's most popular if you like the idea of using what's most in use.
>>9695871The problem that you're not addressing is that, yes, several people have said they don't use facebook, but nobody has offered a suggestion that an equal amount of people DO use. So yeah, there's maybe 3 or 4 people who don't use facebook, but nobody can decide on a different form that can be used.Plus, I'm not just going off of the opinions of people on this thread - I'm also going off of the people I know IRL, and there's at least 10-15 people who said they would be interested in a facebook group, specifically.>>9695867I can tell you right now though that I'm not going to create / mod a group that is on a website that I don't find easy to use, which is what I meant when I said that people are free to piggyback and use discord or reddit or whatever it is that they prefer.Please do keep making suggestions, though. I realize it may come across like I'm shooting down every idea, but I really just want to find the best possible medium. I may make a poll like >>9695871 suggested, but honestly so far the poll would just have options of "facebook" and then "enter your own option" haha
>>9695898>I can tell you right now though that I'm not going to create / mod a group that is on a website that I don't find easy to use, which is what I meant when I said that people are free to piggyback and use discord or reddit or whatever it is that they prefer.Right, but in your post you keep saying to want something we already use, not something that's necessarily easy.What if it was easy to use, but not a website you already use?You seem stuck on the Facebook idea so do what you want op.
>>9695929If it was easy to use and wouldn't be a huge pain for people to go out of their way to check, then that would be good. My problem with using a website people aren't already using is simply that you would have to go out of your way to check it. I think in this day and age, most people aren't that committed to any single group or forum to the point where they'd go that much out of their way. The way I'm seeing it is as if somebody was using cgl JUST for the lifestyle lolita threads, they'd probably stop checking it after a while, right? I know I would. Maybe that's not the best example, but it just seems like nobody's been able to offer any viable alternatives yet, and in my eyes, there's still more "yeas" for facebook than there are "nays".
>>9695967nayrt but keywords are "most people"we're a group of weirdos dedicated to a specific lifestyle who want to talk to each other, not a bunch of bandwagon-hopping meetlitas who only know how to operate normiebook. just sayin', i think you're underestimating how willing we are to talk on another platform.
>>9695979That is very true. But again it also comes down to "how inconvenient is this going to be to mod / monitor", too.
>>9695838>>9695825Just gonna comment that /r/lolita exists for those who don't know. It's kind of borderline active-not active so I don't think anyone would mind a lifestyler post every now and again.Polite sage for slightly OT
>>9696075Thank you for mentioning it! What I'm looking to create is something much more lifestyle-centric, but this is still a good option for people who prefer reddit.
>>9696707Why do you want people to create your group for you but refuse to listen to any suggested ideas? OP, I see you, I feel what you're trying to do, but creating and running a group is not a direct democracy. You need to make some of your own decisions and figure out your shit on your own, otherwise you're going to be sitting here circlejerking about what you want to do eventually.
OP, I think a Facebook group is perfectly fine. Its a widely used platform, it has built in tools for moderating and managing groups. If that's what you find most comfortable, go for it.
>>9696717this. just do it and see if it takes off. try to get other groups to recommend it
>>9696711It's literally only been a day, friend. The main thing I need help with is a name, and I haven't been able to think of anything yet, nor has anyone given any suggestions. I'm 90% sure I'm going to go with facebook, again, unless someone suggests something that I consider better, but I don't want to create the group without having a name (or even a placeholder).It can't be something as simple as "lifestyle lolitas" because the word "lolita" tips of facebook's algorithm and makes the group not appear in searches.
So did anything actually come out of the penpal thing or was that a bust?
>>9696966yes, she gave her email towards the end of the thread >>9686063
>>9696931egl and quaintrelle kinda rhyme. ngl clever fb names are kind of annoying, anyone remember frilly free for all? yikes.
>>9695738I would prefer dreamwidth or livejournal. A lot of comms I liked moved to dreamwidth instead of Facebook when people were leaving livejournal.
>>9695771>>9695777How is it broken? There are still plenty of active livejournals, it's just more niche now.
>>9695986>how inconvenient is this going to be to mod / monitorAs a mod of another comm you seem lazy as fuck. You want all the power without any work. Dont do itWhile i agree for me fb would be easiest for me because im allready a mod of 2 lolita groups and the alert system makes it easy for me to check in on and quickly adress things. Id be interested in looking into tapatalk though. Im on the go a lot and something i can access from my phone would be a quick and easy way to check in on no matter where i am.
>>9695738>quaintrellePlease dont. It just reminds me of victoria stella alice unicorn glitter sprinkles suzanne
>>9697218>As a mod of another comm you seem lazy as fuckI'm not lazy at all? And I don't want "power", either. I just want to provide a place for people to gather and talk. Since most people I know agreed with a facebook group, and I already know how to mod facebook groups, it makes the most sense to use facebook unless a very significant (read: 40% or more, in my opinion) portion of people dissent. There'd be no learning curve involved, and I have at least one other person who volunteered to mod, if it's on facebook.>>9697112>ngl clever fb names are kind of annoyingGood to know. I'm not even looking for a clever name honestly, just any sort of name would be fine.>>9697160>I would prefer dreamwidth or livejournal.I'll look into dreamwidth!>>9697221>>quaintrelle>Please dont.Alright, thank you for your opinion!
>>9697275>>9697324I'd rather use LJ than have to create a new account on a useless site like Dreamwidth.
>>9697328Which is why I was intending on using Facebook in the first place. I said I was going to check out Dreamwidth, and I will, just to see if it's a viable alternative. But since it would mean probably 90% or more of interested group members would have to create new accounts.Also, to those complaining that I'm not taking their suggestions for platforms: please note, I never asked for advice for a platform. From my first post, I made it clear that I was planning on using facebook. I also made it clear that anyone else is free to start a community on discord, reddit, livejournal, etc if they would like to. It seems pretty silly to me to be complaining about someone not taking suggestions they didn't ask for. (I realize my original post was kind of an open ended "what do you think", but I will say I wasn't considering any other platform until people brought it up.)
>>9697328The problem is Livejournal is literally broken (and has been for years, they've never bothered to fix the issue where you have to be logged in or else random comments are missing) and you have to jump through hoops for it to work right.
Didn't Amino have a lifestyle group?
>>9697381Ah, did it? I know a lot of people have a bad taste in their mouth when it comes to amino, and I personally found it a bit confusing to use.
I was looking through the archives and there was an anon who said they had saved all of Skye's Princess Portal. Is that anon still around? You can't look at her blog through the wayback machine anymore
>>9697368If you're planning on using Facebook, then do it. We're still going to complain about Facebook because the lolita community still hates the fact that we have to use it along with normies.
>>9695738>>9697275I’m okay with FB and don’t really know any good alternative. And while I agree that clever FB names can be annoying, I’d really prefer if it’s not called anything as direct as “lolita lifestyle” because that will definitely attract the wrong kind of attention.
If we can get a small group up and running, would anyone be interested in creatively collaborating or participating in exchanges? I was thinking something like a small lookbook or zine, or maybe exchanging little craft goods.
>>9697386I saved a lot of it, but not *all* of it. Is it really not accessible through the wayback machine anymore? That sucks.>>9697387It's totally fine for you to complain about facebook in general, but the fact of the matter is that people are complaining that *I*, in particular, am not taking suggestions on other platforms, and I'm just clarifying that I wasn't looking for suggestions for that, anyway.>>9697452I'm definitely interested in that!>>9697427It can't have the word lolita in it anyway, since as I said above, that makes it so you can't search for it on facebook.General update: I'm planning on making the facebook group within the next 48 hours or so, and I will post it here when I do, but I'm still trying to figure out a name, even if it's just a placeholder.
>>9697464the name seriously doesn't matter and it can change later anyway, just throw in something generic like "EGL Lifestylers" and get it over with.
>>9697464"Lolitas" plural is the problematic word, not "lolita" singular. Just as a heads up.
>>9697452This makes the most sense as a Google group. I'd definitely join in if it was because it's really convenient.
>>9697468I know that the name can be changed later (up to a certain member number, which we probably won't reach anyway), but I'd prefer not to have something that will raise red flags.>>9697472Ah, is it? I'm going to avoid both just to be safe, but thank you for the tip.
>>9697530How would "EGL" raise red flags?
>>9697506I agree! A Google group would avoid FB but still give us a lot of tools and space to interact. Also most people already have a Google account
>>9697530>I'd prefer not to have something that will raise red flags.jesus christ, EGL is the commonly used abbreviation when we don't want to attract creeps or give off the wrong vibe. if you're this worried about normies knowing that you're a lifestyle lolita, i somehow doubt that you actually are one.
>>9697552I was referring to a previous anon's suggestion of just calling it "lifestyle lolita", not egl, but that's some unnecessary salt right there
>>9697594OP, I was one of the posters who really did not want the Lifestyler comm to be on Facebook, but I'm really sorry that it seems like you're being buried under a pile of salt now. >>9697547I do have a Google account (I mean yes, you're right, doesn't everyone?), but I've never been in a Google group before. How are they? I'm still kicking around the idea of like a Discord just for casual chatting purposes as a supplement to a more structured forum but not sure how I'd 'advertise' it. I'm not trying to be elitist or exclusive or that "but i thought lolitas were luvlies!" or anything, just a little paranoid about keeping out crossboarders and 'tourists' for comfort's sake.
>>9697640I'm not sure if that anon thought I meant the groups on G+ or the actual Google groups that you treat like a forum. It has its own page to view posts and it also sends directly to your email whenever someone posts. Either way, I prefer them both over Facebook.
It's that time of year again. Making nothing but tea trays for all of my lolita friends. I never wanna see another candlestick holder again.
>>9697162It's literally broken in that comments disappear and you sometimes have to log in, refresh, log out then log in, etc, to get them to show up again.
>>9697957Why do you feel the need to post this lame unrelated shit everywhere you go? Didn't your momma ever tell you not to shit where you eat?
>>9695898I don't use facebook either, what's the problem with staying on /cgl/? It's a convenient, accessible place that is easy to post and upload pictures to.What exactly are you missing that you would get on facebook?
>>9698423nayrt but Facebook has people who post often but the content is usually shit . Good if you just want new things to look at often though I wish people would post a little more often here
Maybe we could be nostalgiafags and call it "The Princess Portal" since mostly only lifestylers would know what the reference was to anyways.
>>9698428What would you want to see more of? People blogposting about anything related? Inspiration from instagram or wherever? Discussions about random subjects related to the lolita lifestyle?I can try and kick off a discussion by asking the following question. What is needed for you to considered someone a lifestyler and how important are the actual clothes to be a lolita lifestyler?
>>9698423Most of the people who expressed interest in the group don't use cgl. It's as simple as that, honestly. I'm not offering this as a replacement for our cgl lifestyle threads, but as a supplement.>>9698521oh gosh I have such a soft spot for The Princess Portal, so maybe I will do that, at least as a placeholder.
>>9698629this is my personal view and the criteria i hold myself to so hopefully nobody gets bothered:-wearing lolita either most days of the week or every time one leaves the house, excluding obviously inappropriate times like a job or a medical treatment.-incorporating the aesthetics of one's preferred lolita style into most aspects of daily life.-frequently participating in traditionally gentile hobbies and handicrafts.-achieving personal fulfillment and not relying on others for attention or happiness in regards to the lifestyle/fashion. i include this because i think it's important to dress for yourself. actually wearing lolita is integral to the lifestyle imo. it doesn't need to be 24/7, but i feel like once a week and less doesn't cut it. at least, i wouldn't call myself a lifestyle lolita if i wore it that infrequently.
>>9698648*oops, gentil/gentille. not gentile.
>>9698648>i feel like once a week and less doesn't cut it.Out of curiosity, what would you think about someone who either works at a lolita-inappropriate job 5+ days a week or works and has medical treatments so they can't wear it more than once or twice a week? That's not my situation currently, but I used to work retail 4-5 days a week and have medical appointments where lolita would be inappropriate once or twice a week, so I could only wear lolita once or twice a week. I still considered myself a lifestyle lolita because I wore it whenever possible, and because I engage in hobbies that suit the lifestyle.
>>9698700>excluding obviously inappropriate times like a job or a medical treatmentIf someone is medically or professionally unable to wear lolita often then it's hardly their personal choice.
>>9698714I agree with you, but the phrasing of "i feel like once a week and less doesn't cut it. at least, i wouldn't call myself a lifestyle lolita if i wore it that infrequently" makes it sound to me as though it doesn't matter whether or not it's their personal choice.
>>9698728I agree. Not everyone has a job that allows them to wear lolita, and it's not exactly like we can just quit.
>>9698728like the other anon pointed out, the one line in my post includes consideration for a situation like that as well. but i also wrote that post specifically in regards to myself and what's appropriate for my own situation, so it shouldn't really matter what i think about other people's. >tl;dr u do u
>>9698736I'm not quite saying it matters what you think about other people's situations, I was just curious as to what your opinion was, regardless of whether it's actually relevant or not.
>>9698754i'd prefer not to because i feel like i'm being baited into upsetting other people/acting "lolier than thou" when i was just answering a fun question.
>>9698758Oh, I'm sorry that you felt like I was baiting you. That wasn't my intention at all, it was more that I'm just curious about what other lifestyle lolita's opinions are. I ran a survey on exactly that recently, and I was just interested in your opinion, specifically, because it was slightly different than those I had seen expressed in my survey.I'm sorry that I made you feel uncomfortable, and of course you don't have to expand. I can definitely see where you're coming from. Sorry again!
>>9698793What were the results of the survey?
>>9698798Well, there was a lot of results because it was a pretty long survey that touched on various topics. Part of it was about how non-lifestyle lolitas view lifestyle lolitas, part of it was a little bit of demographics of lifestyle lolitas, and some of it was what lifestyle lolitas consider to be lifestyle hobbies / media.
>>9698798>>9698901Sorry, I realize I should have been more specific - with regards to what the other anon was saying, most of the lifestyle lolitas surveyed, I think around 85% or so iirc, said that "wearing lolita or other elegant / feminine fashions as often as possible" makes someone a lifestyle lolita, as opposed to the option that stated "wearing lolita as often as possible" or "wearing lolita or other J-fashion as often as possible". So it was interesting to me that the other anon's opinion, from what I could gather from their posts, was that wearing lolita specifically as often as possible was the most important thing.
>>9698920>other elegant / feminine fashionsLike what?
Please make the group a Facebook one, I would forget about anything that's not in my face all the time cause Im a lazy idiot.
>>9698920I find this so odd. The name is "lifestyle lolita" so I don't see how any other fashions would apply. Maybe I'm being salty, but I feel like a lot of people answered with that just so they could feel included under the term "lifestyle lolita"...
Have anyone had luck making clotted cream? I tried to make clotted cream this weekend via slow cooker, and somehow fucked up along the way.>heavy whipping cream had a "toasty" (?") buttery yellow top layer as it should>smelled really good and sweet - like crème brulée>12 more hrs later>whole thing was mostly solidified: no buttermilk and "whey" separation>has a gravy/pancake batter-like consistency It still didn't solidify after leaving them in the fridge in mason jars all day. I'm going to have to dump it out because it's starting to smell like sweet soft cheese. My only guesses is that my pint of cream didn't have enough fat content and some stabilizers, and my slow cooker wasn't wide enough. I almost want to try again, but with a double boiler method (and try for non-pasteurized cream - ugh, so pricey though), however, I don't want to leave my oven on for 12 hrs. I have a bad habit of leaving the stove on and this month's electricity bill is high (yay winter), so this method terrifies me. (sorry for no pics - I only took a snap of it and my phone's off to charge anyway)>>9697957I hate seeing this shit on pinterest and irl. I see a lot of this and people stacking tea cups into a tiered stand.
>>9697221Quaintrelle reminds me more of Vivcore. Anyone knows what happen with her?
>>9699102nayrt, but I figure this covers the kind of nitpicking you'd see gulls do in the casual lolita threads. I mean, sometimes it's hot and you need eggs so you quickly slap together a couple of AP pieces, the end result looks cute and girly, but also looks like the kind of thing cgl would argue over whether it's lolita or not if you're showing your shoulders and wearing open toe pink sandals.
>>9699102>>9699537Most of the respondents wear other J-fashion in addition to lolita, but the ones that come to mind during this answer are otome and vintage styles. For me personally, it's more of a "when you can't wear lolita, at least wear something nice still", like a casual dress and bolero, rather than defaulting to the "basic" shirt and pants or leggings that many people do. I don't think people said it just to be included, I think it has to do with continuing the aesthetic in all aspects of life, which was another important theme in the survey's answers.>>9699308Don't worry anon, it is going to be a facebook group!>>9699527I don't know, but I am interested to find out.Also, I plan on making the group today. I have a medical appointment in about an hour though, so I will have to make it after that. I'm also going to draft up some preliminary rules first.
>>9699376This video may help you. It's an easier method, in my opinion. https://youtube.com/watch?t=41s&v=LDyyAb6lB48
Hello everyone! I've created the group. Please feel free to join, and begin discussions as you will. There's a few rules in place now, and I may add more rules later on. I may also change the name, depending on what members think of it.(facebook dot com slash) groups/1648293041860085/
>>9699821>it's the fat cosplayer who kept samefagging in another threadColor me disappointed. From what I can tell, you hardly wear lolita and just recycle the same 3-4 main pieces over and over.
Not interested in joining the group but does anyone here needle felt? I just got into it and while I'm not that good it's a fun activity to do especially while commuting. I'm planning on making the little mascots and animals on some of my dresses.
>>9700169I've needle felted a bit and really enjoy it!I'm still a novice, though. So far I've only made a handful of small animals for friends. I want to work on a few mushrooms to turn into pins.
>>9700166Are you really surprised though? I'm not based on their responses in this and other threads.
>>9700191Not so much surprised, just sad that my suspicions were confirmed. I hate that any kind of lifestyle discussion is plagued with roleplayers like OP.
>>9700186I think little needle felt animals would make really great gifts! I have several Christmas cards I'm sending to friends/for the secret santa, and I'm probably going to needle felt a little animal for each of them. It works well because you can make them so small and it's better than sending food and risking it melting or getting seized during customs.
>>9700193I wear lolita 4-5 times a week, I just rarely take photos. You're right that I tend to rewear main pieces. I've been a lifestyle lolita for 8 years, so it's not like I'm inexperienced, and I'm also not a "roleplayer".Devolving to calling someone "the fat cosplayer" because you don't like them is a little ridiculous.I won't be posting about the group at any point any more, because I don't want to spam the discussion here.
>>9700265>4-5 times a week>literally 3-4 different main piecesso you rewear the same things over and over, week after week...? jesus
>>9700276I have way more main pieces than 3-4. I have a relatively small wardrobe, but it consists of 1 OP, 9 JSKs, and 7 skirts. What I meant when I said that I rewear pieces is that I rewear pieces to photo-taking events, because most of my wardrobe is pretty casual, and at events where I am going to take photos, I want to wear something less casual.
>>9700282>8 years in the fashion>17 main pieces>"relatively" small wardrobe>"lifestyle lolita"
>>9700282Anon... No offense but the coords you're wearing in your pictures already look quite casual/wearable to me (without the props). It really makes me wonder what you consider casual then.
>>9700288apparently this is what she considers lolita
>>9700293the headbow is from Baby so it's technically a la mode, r-right
>>9700286I think 17 is a fine size. I wear lolita 2-3 times a week, and I only have 12 main pieces. It helps that about half of them are very versatile pieces. People probably think my wardrobe is pathetic for someone who's been into it for ~5 years, but I don't have room for a massive wardrobe, so I prioritize versatile pieces.
>>9700293>>9700296bruh these photos are 4-5 years old. The second one isn't lolita at all, and I never called it such. If you're going to judge me, at least use recent pictures? check my insta if you're that obsessed with being salty.>>9700300This is my situation as well. I don't have the space for much more.
>>9700309>i've been a lifestyler for 8 years>photos from 4-5 years ago don't represent me!!!really makes you think
>>9700314>how dare people change and get better at thingsYes, one of those photos was what I considered casual lolita 5 or so years ago. I wouldn't consider it lolita now. The other one is just a casual outfit I posted on my personal facebook page.
>>9700309your insta is literally just cosplay and you wearing the same 2 main pieces over and overit's not doing you any favors lmao
>>9700318- 2 photos of me in loyal rosette (plus a selfie)- 1 photo of lady rose- 1 photo handmade woodland creatures skirt- 1 photo handmade gingham skirt- 2 photos wearing meta swan lake skirt- 1 photo (plus one selfie) wearing handmade JSK...?? It's not "wearing the same 2 main pieces over and over"
>>9700321translation: i have photos of myself in 3 main pieces and a bunch of shitty handmade
Man, considering OP ran a /cgl/ panel at Rufflecon she sure doesn't know how to act here
OP, just let it go. You are making it worse for yourself. Take a break, chill and get off CGL for the day.
What do you all do in Lolita?I wanna wearfrills everyday but I can’t figure out reasons to go out in my full pastel monster glory
>>9700321Can you really stop responding? How new are you that you haven't learned this about cgl? You've basically taken up the entire thread.
>>9700343What would you expect from someone who thought a /cgl/ panel is a good idea? People who want to mix 4chan and real life always baffle me.
>>9700364>reasons to go outexist? I wouldn't really call myself a lifestyler, but I wear jfashion near daily and lolita on the weekends and honestly any reason at all. doing errands, getting coffee, visiting friends, it's all good.if you are looking for more ~lifestyle~ things, tea, theater, and museums are always fun!
>>9700374I feel like there’s just a blockade in my mind of going out in something pastel border print and just casually grabbing coffee. What style do you wear and what other jfashions?
>>9700379nayrt but if that's the case, adapt your clothes to suit your lifestyle--not your lifestyle to suit your clothes.like, if i happen to be going to a cafe, i might want to wear something cute (and washable) in pink x brown. i often wear black and some other color when i'm going to the movies, because the contrast feels dramatic. if i'm doing nothing but errands that day, a skirt, blouse, and cardigan will do. you don't need to be all OTT all the time, unless you want to be. i enjoy matching the themes of my life.
>>9700379Usually otome kei (soft lolita, w/e you call it) and a fair bit of himekaji in spring/summer. Occasionally I'll wear normie clothes, but only because I'm in that awkward spot wear I have plenty of clothes for a normal jfash wardrobe but not quite enough to wear it every second of every day.There's really no reason why you need to be doing something special every time you wear lolita, and I'd imagine wearing it daily is going to be difficult if you'll /only/ allow yourself to do lifestyle things.
>>9699737I've seen this video, along with a bunch of others. Thanks though. >>9700286>>9700309same. I'm also not the same size as I was in high school and went through style changes, so I've been buying and selling pieces through the years. >>9700364Mostly hang out with other lolita friends on weekends, outside of official comm meets. Doing things like running errands and treating yourself at a cafe shouldn't be a huge hassle if you have a good amount of casual/versatile pieces and fillers. Save the OTT for special occasions.
Do you guys wear lolita when you visit the gynecologist? I feel like wearing RHS would help.
>>9700265Are u so fat because youre a lifestyle lolita and you only eat sweets
While I appreciate OP's effort, I kind of thought that we were just going to have a small private group... Posting it on RC has already attracted myriad lolitas at heart and the vibe is killed before it's even begun. A small group of (actual) lifestylers sounds much more comfy.
>>9701016Yeah, same. I'm not joining. I might work on a Google group forum or something in the next day or so.
>>9701026I'm glad someone feels similarly. Thank you for taking initiative, and I'll join when you do. Really any platform is fine with me, but I logged into the group today to see our favorite snowflake Sh***** St**** posting her typical nonsense and I know it's all downhill from here.
>>9701016I joined and left as soon as I scrolled down and saw a post by Shanice. It also would have been a good idea to establish an introduction thread instead of the current situation of letting everyone run amok clamoring for attention.
>>9701043>>9701038Please screencap it. How bad is it?
>>9701016Out of curiousity, what would your standards for "actual lifestylers" be?I'm actively working on transitioning from lolita-on-the-weekends to lolita-whenever-possible but I'm not there yet. However, I'm not there yet and don't want to be lolita at heart: lifestyler edition. Would it be okay to lurk, or would you rather I not?
>>9701038Personally, I'd like it off Facebook to help combat some of this. While Facebook might be easiest or most convenient for those of us ITT, it's also therefore the easiest for people to overrun. I'm so sick of people like ShaBad that I barely go on the FB groups.
>>9701045I can't since I already bounced, but she took a picture from some art book with "elemental Lolitas" and asked which one people identified as.
>>9701045It's bad. The rest of the group is being spammed with "hi i'm X and this is why i'm special" posts as well. A few of them mention being lifestyle lolitas despite not wearing lolita, which is interesting.>>9701048The definition clearly varies from person to person. I'm rigid in that I wouldn't consider myself a lifestyle lolita if I didn't wear lolita most days of the week. However, I know that isn't feasible for most people, and you at least sound reasonable, so you shouldn't be confined to lurking. It's really just the "i only wear lolita once in a blue moon and don't put any effort into the lifestyle but i'm totemo a lifestyle lolita :))())))))" kinds of people who bother me.
>>9701061Eh, I'll probably lurk until I get a feel for the group but thanks! It's just nice to get inspo from other people while I'm working my way there. Just didn't want to invade your space.
>>9701048I'd say wearing lolita at least 2-3x per week (more as schedule allows) and not dressing like a slob the other times, actively engaged in lifestyle hobbies (sewing, art, needle work, baking, music, ballet, etc.),and making an effort to lolify some aspects of your life (decor, taking time to pamper yourself) are my three main criteria. Obviously actually wearing lolita is the biggest one, but imo you're not a lifestyler unless you embody some of the lifestyle, even if you wear lolita every day. Or, you're not who I would see benefitting from a group like this
>>9701016Yeah that was by far the stupidest fucking thing she could have done. >what does lifestyle mean?>it means different things for different people! And there goes the group. It should have been announced here with a lengthy questionnaire to make sure you were actually letting in lifestyles instead of every fat deranged weeab within earshot.
>>9701075ha... it doesn't help that OP herself is a fat deranged weeb. pretty sure she was so wishywashy with the definition just so she could include herself.
This new group is already awful i am so dissapointed. Should i just make a new fb group and screen it so only people who actually wear lolita can join? I might have a screening process similar to the one my comm has. Try to make things a little more organized like a pintrist craft album/recipie album/ etc what would you think?
>>9701085Omfg I didn’t even realize it was HER that made the group. God fucking dammit.
>>9701089Please do. Make the process to get in a bit more difficult so we don’t get a flood of lolitas at heart.
>>9701089What's the screening process your comm has? Has it been effective?
>>9701089I have to agree, I think there needs to be more vetting. I am already not super pleased that so many posts state that they dont wear lolita often, etc
>>9701089People who actually wear lolita are a good start. However, are there any other criteria we can agree upon? There's a flood of lolitas within that group, but it's doubtful that the majority of them are lifestylers. Though, I think it'll be less of an issue if we keep it small.
>>9701091>>9701095>>9701106>>9701115In my comm we use to have a copy paste system with a bunch of questions (are you lolita, where are you from, do you plan to be active, etc etc) but potential lolita and noobs are let in since it is an area specific comm and people who dont quite cut it end up either flouncing or slowly improve at any rate. Creeps are promptly kicked out if they manage to get past the screening process. I would do screening a bit more strict since this would be a lifestyle lolita group, you would obviously have to already be a wearer of the fashion. Since fb only allows 2 questions when you request to join a comm perhaps ill just keep the old system of my comm and only admit members after a short interview through pm. So far i have rules for admittance being:>must have messages open for an afmin to contact you>provide at least 2 different coordinate photos of you in lolita>are you a lifestyle lolita and if so, why do you consider yourself one?>what are your "lifestyle" hobbies include>what do you plan to contribute to the community or what do you hope to gain from joining here?My comm is very organized and has an introduction album to post a photo and a little blurb about yourself and a sales album. For this group I would also like to include(as stated above) an album for maybe hair tutorials, craft diys and recipies, so everything is organized and easy to find. Monthly coord threads, haul threads, diy threads, etc.Any other suggestions?
>>9701201i like this, especially the bit about lifestyle hobbies because i think it's a point that's often neglected. i don't have anything to add except pls make this, and if you need help with anything at all i'm down (after being vetted myself of course). i just want to make this happen.
>>9701226Thanks! Im making it now, Ill post when I have things a little more organized and ready to use! Always open to suggestions after it goes live as well!
>>9701201Does everyone just want anon to make a new fb group then, or should I still go ahead and make a non-fb group/forum?
>>9701244Doing both would be fine, that way we could also appeal to those who dislike FB. There would be a crossover in the userbase but people will naturally float towards whichever one they like most, or even both!
>>9701244Please feel free to make a non fb group in addition to the one im working on! I just prefer fb because it is easy to access and moderate from my phone when im not at a pc or on my laptop.
>>9698235This has never happened to me nor have I heard of it happening to anyone else and I use lj on a daily basis
>>9697368You should want people to make new accounts. Otherwise any lolita at heart with facebook will join (unless nobody knows about it in which case only a few people from this thread will join).
>>9701270regarding the concern of only a few people joining, you'd be surprised how many people lurk the lifestyle thread. the main egl discord was discussing it, and this is a public board so word will inevitably spread. though a smaller group is just fine since it feels more genuine
>>9701201>provide pics>tfw uggo duckling Shit.
>>9701302Blank out ur face
>>9701048I think lolita has to be part of your identity in some way and not just clothing, even if you wear it 24/7. Lolita has a lot of different influences and interesting background, so there's bound to be things you can relate to.
Any good embroidery resources you guys would recommend?
>>9701201This all sounds really excellent and like the other anon said I can't even think of anything to add. Please do it this way because that other group is a god damned mess.
>>9701244A private subreddit might fit your needs.
>>9701323Needlenthread.com is my favourite resource, it's run by a lovely texan lady who both really loves embroidery and is really good at it. She has solid advice and easy to follow howto videos for specific stitches.
>>9701090just checked her tumblr and she posts her nudes>so lifestyle loli UwU pls give me paci daddy
>>9701523That's... I can only find the picture uploaded to a different source and I'm bad at recognizing faces, especially when half of them are shopped, so I'm not convinced without the actual tumblr.
>>9701477I second this! Needlenthread has been a great resource for me as a beginner embroiderer. >>9701523You can not like her or this as much as you like, but I still don't think it's cool to post this sort of thing in the lifestyle thread unwarranted. I love you, gulls, but this sort of thing makes me really wary of being the creator of a group. I don't personally like posting nudes and shit all over the internet, but we've all done things we're not necessarily proud of, and unfortunately a lot of those things are on the internet for our generation. God forbid one of you pull up the shitty Yugioh fanfic I wrote on Neopets.
>>9701523>>9701567Nvm, I started digging myself, I take back what I said.
>>9701523All that can be found on her tumblr is two posts like this and a lot of pastels and frills. I'd say it's no big deal. She does seem a bit like what you'd expect from a typical tumblrina though.
>>9701575I rather someone roast me on fanfic because at least that doesn’t change how I am with Lolita. If you post nudes online you can’t be surprised that it gets found out.
>>9701523Gross. This is not the kind of person who should be representing the lifestyle community, regardless of her public nudes.
>>9701647I don't think posting nudes necessarily changes how you are with lolita, unless you're doing it as a fetish, regularly, or professionally, imo I think this post is really unflattering, and I don't know what else she put on there, though.
>>9701717>I think this post is really unflatteringI think this is the one she said is her favorite picture of herself.Either way, it mostly just like any pastel themed tumblr. A bit more underwear than I'd expect and some talk about how she's handicapped and has knee pain. Nothing to get worked up about, but you can check the tumblr yourself. Google her facebook page name (the one in the url) and you'll find it.
Ok guys I just got off of work, but I think I've got the basic layout all finished up. Let me know if I should edit anything.facebook dot com slash groups slash 1724940834218062
>>9701817joined! i'm not sure how to make it so that anybody can message me, but hopefully that's just the default setting.
Probably should have known that this thread would veer off. Kind of hard to pick a new topic point that's not already mentioned in other threads (i.e. makeup thread, room spo). Anyone have any cute ideas for storing boring old tea bags in? I regret donating my roommate's jewelry box instead of keeping it for myself. And I guess since it's coming up, anyone baking anything cute or fancy for Thanksgiving or just sticking with the classics? I want to bake a pastry (not pie) with pumpkin filling or make an apple strudel, but everyone brings too much food in spite of being a big family, so I can't be bothered anymore. Hopefully the cousins will like some Mexican hot chocolate after dinner. >>9701061That's so sad, but also takes me back to my babby lolita days of thinking that CLAMP-like designs could ever translate well irl.
>>9701929I use old vintage cookie tins to store all my bagged tea.
literally what else did she expect from selfposting, samefagging, lying, and whiteknighting herself here
>>9702591>it has nothing to do with my leadership or organizing skills.But it does. You literally made a group, let it get flooded with hundreds of non lolitas and lolita enthusiasts, didnt have any real rules or organization at all, let the page get flooded with "hi i love lolita and even though i dont wear it..." and other unrelated posts, left them there, and when people told you they didnt want to be apart of your shit show you flounced. I dont care if you're fat or have shitty cosplays, you obviously dont have the experience or maturity to run any kind of group. Quit trying to make it the fault of everyone else.If i were her I'd just nuke that group honestly.
I want to start learning to bake, especially cakes because I think decorating them will be so fun, but I don’t actually want to eat them. Anyone have any ideas of what I can do with the cakes? I imagine my friends will gets sick of them quickly.
>>9702671Maybe see if there are any local soup kitchens you could give the cakes too?
>>9702671I have this problem too anon but I usually bring them to coworkers and people who aren't in my immediate circle. You could also probably donate them, but I know some food pantries have rules against homemade food items. Also, you could always make decoden shit with the acrylic frosting if you just want to make cute frosting designs.
>>9702671Coworkers always love free food, my work does potlucks now and then. I would also suggest freezing them and slowly going through it that way for things you may eat. But some food freeze better than others and don’t keep it in too long.
>>9702689Better to make them fresh for each event and just take any opportunity or excuse possible to bake. Holidays and birthdays are always good for cakes and other baked goods.
>>9702591Why would she post this?If she didn't want any more attention drawn to herself she would have just taken a break without the big announcement...
>>9702708Probably because she doesn't actually want to "take a break from the internet," she just wants asspats and to be told that she did nothing wrong.>>9702591While I do agree that mentioning her (unsavory) pictures here was a bit much, she really needs to buck up. All of these tears over literally nothing. At least, not anything that she hasn't brought upon herself by not taking suggestions and lacking common sense.
>>9702591All in a day's work.I honestly don't understand people who think it's a good idea to reveal their real identities on anonymous networks. If she made the the group without ever involvint /cgl/ I don't think it'd be a problem to be honest. Except maybe the nudes.
>>9702738I think outing herself wouldn't have been an issue if she wasn't such a cringefest. If somebody else created the same group (simultaneously revealing who they are), actually wore the fashion, and wasn't a literal lolcow, this wouldn't have escalated as far as it did. Basically it's all her fault for being an insufferable cunt desu
>>9702591>lists her height and weight>31.2 bmi>is literally obese>still won't call herself fat>got pissy when people said she was fatholy shit
>>9702746I mostly mean facebookers have different standards, and sometimes our standards can be a bit tricky. But I agree someone else could have made it work out with better organization and less of a background to pick apart.
>>9701817Thank you anon this is already a much better group.
>>9702785Seconding this, I hope we can accrue a few more members soon to really get the ball rolling!
>>9701817Will there be a Google group or G+ group too?
>>9701929Have you thought of decorating your own cute box? For tea storage or anything really.
>>9700169I do! I'm also still learning but I'd love to make accessories one day. Currently I'm still working on getting shapes and details right but eventually I want to learn how to felt longer hair to make more realistic animals. Unfortunately wool is rather expensive where I live unless I order in bulk (and I do mean BULK) from a neighbouring country. If I didn't have such a tiny apartment I'd fill a room with wool, but alas.
>>9699673>Don't worry anon, it is going to be a facebook groupEnjoy having all the normie itas from cof and rufflechat pretending to be lifestylers ya goose.
>>9700309You are the kind of average bitch I would expect to be posting here.
>>9700367She's a dumb normie from fb. Of course she's a newfag.
>>9700369Eh. I met my best friend on here.
>>9702591lol, all this B'AWWWWWing and she's still pretending she's a lifestyler and running her shitty group. i thought she wanted a break from the internet?
>>9703326This thread is fucking fantastic.
>>9701717Lolita is a fashion about modesty. If you consider yourself a lifestyle and do something as unsavory as posting nudes of yourself publicly then you most certainly aren't following through with being a lifestyle lolita.
>>9703320Nah, I think she's just stupid. It's funny because she used to namefag with her real name years ago. Found it in the archive.
I just would appreciate a true lifestyle Lolita group one that’s filtered out pretentiousness and edgelordness. I just want a group to discuss how to wash and maintain these clothes for more regular wear, what shoes to wear on a daily basis and hw to make them more comfortable, and ways to cut down on the time it costs to get ready then put things away. For me lifestyle Lolita is defined by the dominance of the wardrobe in her life.
So, I've been in the fashion for about two years now - my wardrobe is still not big enough for daily wear, but I'm headed towards that, definitely.Some questions:Do you just wear only lolita on the daily or do you consider wearing outside fashion as something ok? For example, if you wear mainly lolita but use things like larme or fairy kei as a 'lazy day coord', do you consider yourself a lifestyle lolita?How often do you repeat your coords? How many of you have wardrobes so big that you find yourself not wearing repeats, but still having dresses that you haven't worn in months/years? And finally, since the thread is mostly about the Facebook group:Would a lolita who is working her way towards becoming a lifestyler be welcomed into the group? Definitely not a newfag here, but like I said, I don't have big enough of a wardrobe to wear my stuff everyday without repeating after two/three weeks.
>>9702919oh yeah, no, I wanted to see other people's ideas and personal projects (and not so stealthily veer the conversation back on topic, somehow, even though I know better). /polite sage
>>9703506we have one that looks promising, apply and contribute this kind of stuff?
>>9703514I wear lolita or at least put effort to look cute on weekends. Lolita doesn't break the dress code since I work at a collections agency (boo), but I don't want to wear it there either. As for the other two questions: yes and maybe once a month. It's more like I repeat the same favorite main pieces and try to wear them differently. I have favorites that are easier to wear very often and older/fancier pieces that rarely get worn (like maybe ILDs or something). The older pieces are kind of a pain because I want to sell them to someone who'd would wear them, but they're not worth much and so have some sentimental value or ability to coord with my wardrobe - however, they're kind of unflattering too. I think the issue of repeating main pieces or even coords is a pretty common among lolitas once they get to a certain amount of items. I mean, I do it with my normie clothes and so long as I'm not sharing them via social media, I'm not so worried about this unspoken faux pas.
>>97035141) for me it's lolita 4 times a week, and the other 3 days are just cute pajamas (i don't leave the house if i don't need to) or the kind of twee fashion we see in the "girly fashion general" here. i consider myself a lifestyler though.2) i rarely repeat coords. i don't even have a huge wardrobe (a little under 40 main pieces) but i always make new combos with cardigans and blouses and stuff 3) not sure if i count in that category, but i have a few dresses that are so intricate i'd only wear them on a special date or for an event so they don't see the light of day oftenand lastly, i think you would fit in well with the group even if you're not a "fully fledged" lifestyler if you A) wear lolita fairly often and B) are pretty serious about pursuing the lifestyle. i don't run the group but i'd welcome you anyway. really, it's only roleplayers that bother me.
I wear lolita or at least put effort to look cute on weekends. Lolita doesn't break the dress code since I work at a collections agency (boo), but I don't want to wear it there either. As for the other two questions: yes and maybe once a month. It's more like I repeat the same favorite main pieces and try to wear them differently. I have favorites that are easier to wear very often and older/fancier pieces that rarely get worn (like maybe ILDs or something). The older pieces are kind of a pain because I want to sell them to someone who'd would wear them, but they're not worth much and some have some sentimental value or ability to coord with my wardrobe. Some are made with unflattering cuts too.I think the issue of repeating main pieces or even coords is a pretty common among lolitas once they get to a certain amount of items. I mean, I do it with my normie clothes and so long as I'm not sharing them via social media, I'm not too worried about this unspoken faux pas.
>>9703514I wear every other day due to my classes (labs are not good for wearing lolita, especially when using chemicals lol). Any other time, I do larme kei.I repeat my coords, both lolita and larme) maybe every month, because there's some coords that I just love (I'll admit I have repeated several larme coords once every week because I love them so much). As long as you're not constantly posting photos of the same coord with one accessory different, there's really no big deal.Like everyone else, I have a few lolita pieces that are just too dressy for everyday wear.I think the group should be opened to those pursuing being a lifestyler. As long as you're in the fashion, respectful, and try to contribute and learn, I don't see any issues with having you in it.
>>9703547I agree with your last sentiment, but I understand them being careful... Like, that Secret Garden group definitely has lolitas who WANT to be lifestylers, but it's a trainwreck. They have to draw the line in the sand somewhere, right?
>>9703549Then you kick them out after you realize that they’re heart isn’t in the right place. Easy peesy.
>>9703559Top dramu would ensue
>>9703506Anon, please read the thread. There is one here--> >>9701817
>>9703528>The older pieces are kind of a pain because I want to sell them to someone who'd would wear them, but they're not worth much and some have some sentimental value or ability to coord with my wardrobe. Some are made with unflattering cuts too.Sounds right up my alley anon. Id be interested depending on what they are. I have a large collection of older pieces i wear on the daily for school/work
>>9703487Facebook normies are stupid, anon.
>>9703346>lolita is about modestyNo, it isnt.
>>9703643Yes it is. It's about being ladylike and old-fashioned, which you can't do if you're a thot.
>>9703487holy fuck, looked at the archives and apparently she's been a delusional flake for at least 4 years. i think we've found a new cow.
>>9703733Who namefags with their real name? Good lord.
Hey, aspiring lifestyle lolita here, and I have a lot of questions for you ladies if you don't mind me asking! How do your daily coords compare with your meetup coords? How closely do you match colors, motifs, etc and how long did it take you to build up a wardrobe that could give you a new outfit daily that looked good? What would you say is a good number of main pieces to strive for? (and blouses and shoes and whatnot if you are feeling very generous) Do you ever cut corners (like wear black maryjanes in an outfit with no black?) and what are your opinions on those who do? Also, there are a lot of stories about total strangers reacting to lolita, but what about people you see on a semi-regular basis? What kind of comments do you get from them? I'm talking classmates, teachers, coworkers, bosses, acquaintances, the guy who works at the deli counter where you buy your daily sandwich, people like that.
>>9703759hi aspiring anon!1) i don't go to meetups, but my daily coords are "meetup-worthy" i think. a lot of my pieces are prints which add a little oomph, and i consider things like color balance/shape/small details in every coordinate. i think i overdress compared to what people typically imagine lifestylers to be.2) i match colors every time, and often motifs as well. it's only taken me about a year and a half to get to this point.3) i just counted and i have 40, which i feel is more than enough for regular wear. it's not really a numbers game though, and you should set your own wardrobe goals based on your own lifestyle.4) i never cut corners, the closest thing i can think of is pairing white shoes with things a lot but i typically balance it out with a white blouse or something. i don't judge people who do cut corners if they need to, especially people who manage to make it look alright.5) my classmates/teachers who i see on a regular basis either react extremely kindly or show no reaction at all. especially now that they've gotten to know me, they know that it's my norm so they don't feel the need to mention it (unless they really like the particular dress i'm wearing that day or something)wall of text but cute questions. good luck!
>>9703682Lol, maybe to someone new, but no, it's never been about being old-fashioned. Old-fashioned is you become a respectable housewife, and have plenty of kids to make your parents proud, not spend all your money on alt fashion. It's like you don't even know why the fashion exists at all.
>>9704940There is no contradiction between those two ideas. Young women can spend all they want on clothing before they get married, as long as they don't mooch off of others and earn the money themselves.
>>9703682Catch me wearing lolita on the weekdays and being a slut on weekends because a fashion shouldn’t take over every single aspect of your identity every hour of the day, you moron.
>>9705134>a fashion shouldn’t take over every single aspect of your identity every hour of the dayDid you notice what thread you're posting in or
>>9705134then you're not a lifestyler lol
So like... wouldn't a lolita in a full time DDlg relationship be the perfect lifestyler? Convince me that I'm wrong or I'm gonna assume I'm right on target.
>>9705161what does DDLG have to do with anything though? you're already wrong because degeneracy isn't cute or ladylike.
>>9705188So a girl who stays home all day doing what her man tells her to do isn't cute or ladylike? If you get right down to it, the only thing more traditional and ladylike would be doing all of those things, except not calling your husband "Daddy," and just popping out as many kids as possible so that they can call him "Daddy" instead of you.Littles tend to act cute and ladylike more often than any other women/girls. Ideally, they're completely loyal and devoted to their partner/Daddy. But yeah, it's so degenerate when you add in some unconventional pet names to the mix.
>>9705194"Doing what her man tells her" isn't and wasn't lolita. It's pretty much the opposite. If you read anything about the origins of the culture, you'd know that japanese women dressed like that to fight against the typical model of "get married and do what your husband says".
>>9705194are you the same anon who was shit-stirring in the other thread about sweet lolita being ageplayget a hobby
>>9705203Not the same anon and I don't think sweet lolita is inherently ageplay. Nor am I a proponent of overt ageplaying of any sort in public. I'm simply saying that a lolita in a full time (overtly only in private, of course) DDlg relationship is the epitome of a lifestyler.>>9705202you're bringing up a point that's been shot down a bunch already in this thread though?
>>9705208imo the whole point of being a lifestyle lolita is relying only on yourself, your clothes, and your personal hobbies for happiness. that's the "lolita spirit." a kink like that means relying entirely on somebody else for care and happiness, which isn't lolita-like at all. maybe my opinion is unpopular but a certain level of solitude/independence is needed in order to be a lifestyle lolita. you can't do that if you're needing somebody else to take care of you all of the time, and constantly begging for their approval or attention.
>>9705208>shot down a bunch already in this threadWhere? It was mostly about facebook group drama, disscusion about how often you have to wear lolita to be considered a lifestyler and few posts about embroidery and baking.>>9705213This so much. While it's nice to have some sort of community, lolita is about being a social reject in a good way.
Isn't there a bit of a younger aspect though? While having a significant other called "daddy" may not be your cup of tea, but dressing in such a way to push against mainstream, much like how woman originally did against their husbands, is to gather attention to yourself, and promote self confidence? Why would it not be important to have someone in your life to also help promote your confidence, and one of their sole jobs is to raise your self esteem up, and help you get out of a shell you may be in? Daddies often are there to show love, kindness, and care, while allowing you to become more independent, and feel safer being yourself.
>>9705231short answer: nolong answer: read >>9705213 again. the whole point is to NOT need somebody else to do that for you.
>>9705234Well I understand that, but am I wrong about my other points, going out to build your own self esteem? Pushing against mainstream? You ignored half of my argument, which supports the second half
>>9705235i didn't ignore half of your argument, i didn't address it because you were reaching. you're contradicting yourself: "going out to build your own self-esteem" is something that a lifestyle lolita would do for herself. it's possible to have a typical healthy relationship without adding the sick kink layer that you're trying to shoehorn in. go jerk off somewhere else please.
>>9705237What I was saying is that trying to build ones self esteem is good for a person, while having someone who also does it on top of that, is also beneficial, and its not a sick kink, as its more then just sex, but its the relationship between two people. There is more love and care in it, rather then just sex. I was not pushing the sex portion at all, if thats your views of it, thats fine, but its not everyones view, and you should understand and respect that
>>9705240>roleplaying child rape isn't a sick kinki don't need to respect that. anyway, you're either a) a little who is desperately trying to convince herself that she's a lifestyle lolita (you're not and never will be) or b) an abusive fuck who's trying to push his kinks onto other people. either way, you can kindly fuck off. ageplayers are the scum of the earth.
I don't understand why lifestyle lolita = having a lolita personality or mindset. Isn't the most integral part of it wearing the clothes frequently?For example, if somebody wears the clothing 7 days a week, but they don't have any stereotypical lolita interests such as tea, embroidery, etc. Would they be more or less of a lifestyle lolita than somebody who wears only 2 days a week and engages in those hobbies? Correct me if I'm wrong, but the vibe I'm getting from the recent posts in this thread are very fake, for lack of a better word. You have to change your personality and your interests and make yourself into a different person. Why would you give up things you already enjoy to be a lifestyle lolita? There's enjoying the stereotypical lifestyle lolita hobbies, and then there's replacing those hobbies with all of your other interests entirely. Why wouldn't >>9705134 be considered a lifestyler? I'd agree that going out to get plastered every weekend isn't very lifestyler-like, but she already wears lolita very frequently and say she already participates in those lolita related hobbies too. Do you have to give up everything that doesn't fit the guidelines to be considered one?
>>9705245>Why would you give up things you already enjoy to be a lifestyle lolita?the point is that a lifestyle lolita already enjoys those things. i'm not replacing my hobbies with other interests-- these were already my interests before i started wearing lolita. assuming somebody is fake just because they like traditionally feminine things is silly.
>>9705246well in this case I'm talking more about thot-anon here >>9705134She wears lolita very often. If she participated in those lolita hobbies, but still went out and partied on the weekends, would she be considered a lifestyler or not?
>>9705248imo "catch me wearing lolita on the weekdays" isn't enough information. if you just wear the fashion without embracing the lifestyle, then you're a daily lolita.
>>9705244Who said anything about child rape or age play? Why does a DD/LG have to include either of those things? And I am not trying to push any lifestyle onto anyone, rather defend the choice I have made. What do you do as a lifestyler? Do you go to Japanese restaurants everyday? Drink tea? Do embroidery? Do you wear you coord every single day? Have a coord for going to bed? What defines a life styler? Someone who lives in a mindset and cannot be swayed? Or someone who participates in an online community and goes to events, and likes to go shopping and enjoy their time and showing off a part of their personality and their self image? Lets compare this to something like emos, to be a lifestyler emo do you need to cut yourself? Where do you draw the line to say "this is someone who lives the lifestyle" vs "this is a hobbiest" or even "this is a poser"
>>9705250I think having all these terms is kind of silly but that does make more sense then. Thanks anon
>>9705251lurk moar instead of being overly defensive because this thread (and the last one) is already full of answers to your myriad questions
>>9705253I am not being defensive at all, I was asking questions, which seems to be what this thread is about. You have decided to tell me to go away, rather then have a conversation about different aspects of the lifestyle, and what defines it
>>9705244You okay over there?
>>9705255alright then, you ready to be spoonfed?>what do you do as a lifestyler?wear lolita most days of the week and feminine fashion/PJs the other days of the week if i'm not leaving the house. i actually do have "coords" for going to bed--they're called cutsew OPs. i drink tea, do embroidery, knit, read, and study music from the 18th and 19th century.>what defines a lifestyler?this mindset: >>9705213as well as wearing lolita most days of the week/whenever they leave the house. embracing traditionally feminine hobbies and living for yourself.>where do you draw the line?somebody who treats lolita as only clothing is a "daily lolita." somebody who doesn't wear lolita but invests in the "mindset" or "lifestyle" behind lifestyle lolita is a poser. somebody who reaches all of the criteria (wearing the fashion, having the mindset, and having the hobbies) is a lifestyler in my eyes.all of these are my personal opinions that are bound to trigger people who don't fit within those confines, but i remain steadfast.>>9705257no, kinksters like the person i'm spoonfeeding deserve hell.
>>9705259So whose your favorite composer from the 18th or 19th century? Do you play any classical instruments? Also what do you do for a living to afford to be a lifestyler? Or do you have someone in your life sponsoring it?
>>9705262liszt, piano/cello/flute, well-off family and working from home. sage because OT and this is my last response to your weird interrogation.
>>9705272Alright so you work at home, likely running some kind of online shop, or taking phone calls, which in the standards you are talking about, are both not feminine or fancy. As for having someone sponsor your lifestyle, doesn't that defeat the whole point you are trying to make? If you are all about individuality, and pro woman, shouldn't you be off on your own? I am just saying there is different kinds of lifestyles out there, and just because you don't do something a specific way, doesn't mean you should be exclude, but rather encouraged to gain self confidence in the way that may be the most fit for them?
>>9705275>being this autistic
>>9705278>>>9705275>>being this autisticNotice that I am not attacking you, yet you feel the need to attack me, you have no response because I am right. Lolita is about escapism, and so are many other lifestyles, and you can combine them nicely, if you want to live the lifestyle truly, move to Japan, and live it completely correctly.
>>9705282>you can only be a lifestyler in Japanthe kinkster has gone full retard
Being a lifestyler:>as well as wearing lolita most days of the week/whenever they leave the house. embracing traditionally feminine hobbies and living for yourself.>>>where do you draw the line?>somebody who treats lolita as only clothing is a "daily lolita." somebody who doesn't wear lolita but invests in the "mindset" or "lifestyle" behind lifestyle lolita is a poser. somebody who reaches all of the criteria (wearing the fashion, having the mindset, and having the hobbies) is a lifestyler in my eyes.>
>>9705275Nayrt, but what are you trying to say? She should go live in a forest, hunting for her own food? There always be some sort of dependance on another person if you live in normal society. Work, for most people, is just a mean of living. You say about excluding because someone has different lifestyle, but why should we not? If you only wear sweatpants and don't have any interest in hobbies why should we say they are as much of a lifestyler as that anon? There is a spectrum of lifestyle lolitas, but we should be able to cut the line somewhere.
>>9705287That's exactly what I'm saying, there are tons of versions of a lifestyler, whether it be DD/LG or some one who works from home, why does it have to be looked down upon for one lifestyle, that promotes self growth, while the other person who promotes a specific style, and puts down others on some of their choices. What looks better for a community, empowerment, or belittling others to feel superior?
>>9705289You're fucking retarded. GTFO with your kink.
>>9705289Your kink isn't welcome anywhere, be it "just" lolita, or lifestyle lolita. We don't care what you do in your bedroom, no one cares. But if you try to openly force it on others, saying it's the "perfect" way to be a lifestyler, it's harmful and if you think it's not, you are in major denial.
>>9705289>whether it be DD/LG or...No. There's a reason "littles" are almost as hated as sissies, and that's because you keep trying to make your fetish a lifestyle and broadcasting it for everyone to know when nobody cares and almost everyone is disgusted by it. Go away, that shit ain't lolita.
>>9701942I just got the cutest one at the local thrift store and I'm so excited!!
>>9705290>>9705293>>9705294Who said anything about bedroom stuff? I never even mentioned anything about sex, actually.. You keep bringing it up - do you need to get some? And where was I promoting my lifestyle? I was just asking to be proven wrong that a little isn't a version of a perfect lifestyle lolita. I don't think I have said anything to encourage others to join the DDLG lifestyle, while you have done nothing but promote your version of the lifestyle, while insulting myself, and many others.I am being an adult about this conversations, while you are showing the traits of a bratty little. Which is a bit ironic. >>9705296That's awesome! It's hard to find stuff like that in thrift stores around here.
>>9705304DD/LG is a kink. You're the one who keeps mentioning it.
>>9705305And a lifestyle, its more then sex, its a different level of care, love, and affection. The sex is just a bonus. There are many DD/LG relationships that are strictly non-sexual. These people are in it for the three things I listed above. My relationship started off that way, where we just cared for each other, but it grew, and became something more than that.
>>9705315no1curr. go blogpost about your degeneracy somewhere else.
>>9705315you're disgusting, get your kink out of this damn fashion.
>>9705315A BDSM power exchange relationship has nothing at all to do with Lolita fashion or the lifestyle, at all. Why are you SOOOO insistant to be a lifestyle Lolita when you simply are not? Like if I wore jeans every single day and my hobbies were idk hiking and surfing exclusively I couldn't say "No guys I'm still a Lifestyle Lolita just because I say I am!!" I do not agree however that you have to be independent to be a lifestyle Lolita I think that's a bit retarded, I don't want to be a hikikomori with no friends. My Lolita lifestyle is sponsored by my boyfriend who is I guess an Ouji lifestyler? So.
>>9705353nayrt but I took the independence thing to mean less about being an absolute loner and more about dressing for yourself not requiring external validation and the approval of others. This completely clashes with the dd/lg lifestyle which is codependent and a big part of it dressing/acting/living a certain way for someone else. You don't have a lonelita like Momoko to be a 'real lifestyler' or anything, but you have to be self assured and most importantly you should be dressing for yourself. Having some of the related hobbies is a part of it too, but the core of the 'lolita spirit' and lifestyle is dressing and living for yourself in my opinion. Having said that, if being a 'lifestyle lolita' required you to be a hikikomori with no friends, then there would be no such thing as lolita comms.If financial independence was what you're referring to, I don't think that really matters as everyone's situation is different. Who cares if your ouji boyfriend funds your lolita lifestyle? As long as you are wearing the fashion for yourself because you love it, rather than wearing it solely because it's what he likes and you're desperate for validation from him or anything, you're fine.
Js, this thread, and all the posters deserved this.
>>9705415>t. someone bitter that they're not a lifestyler
>>9705398>mfw somebody understands my concept of the lolita spirit entirelythat makes me so happy>>9705353i typed that up in a hurry, so the way i communicated it may have sounded like you need to be a hikki or whatever. but that's not what i meant--i just meant self-fulfillment and really doing what you love for yourself.
>>9705353Except that hiking and surfing and jeans have nothing to do with lolita fashion/lifestyle. Being independent, going against mainstream society, rebelling against what is expected of adult women (which is for women to be conventionally sexy rather than cute), being dainty and polite, etc are all things that characterize lolita fashion/lifestyle. They are also all things that an ideal little would be. So you're missing the point. Sorry littles who happen to wear lolita are better at living the lolita lifestyle than your prudish self. Crai moar
>>9705456you're not a lifestyle lolita and you never will be. you're just a shameful kinkster aspiring for something that you will never have. it must feel bad for you, sorry : ^ (
>>9705456Having some gross fuccboi “caring” for you doesn’t make you a better lolita, it makes you a sick fuck wanting to role play a child that gets fucked
>>9705456Except lolita grew out of the Japanese punk movement as a complete rejection of male control. You're a bad lolita.
>>9705456What does being a little have at all to do with Victorian/Edwardian/Rococo. Drinking out of a sippy cup, eatind dinosaur chicken nuggets and generally behaving like a child while someone babies you has nothing at all to do with Lolita fashion or the lifestyle. I don't understand why you're so upset. You just are not a lifestyle Lolita, you simply are not anymore than a surfing, jeans-wearing hiker is. Nothing about being a little has shit to do with being a Lolita. It's quite embarrassing how upset you are. Didn't your daddy teach you that you can't always get what you want? Also I literally mentioned my boyfriend in that post I'm far from a prude, but what kink related shit we do is not anyones business but ours. It is not a "lifestyle". Even power exchange details of our relationship define our relationship exclusively, and have nothing to do with either of our lifestyles. You're being dumb.
>>9705456Lolita lifestyle hobbies are mature things like embroidery or playing instruments, being a little is about immature baby shit. So how is there any correlation.
>>9705456>>Being independent By being codependent on your daddy/carer ? >>rebelling against what is expected of adult women Expected by whom, because these days a lot of men quite like infantilized women, just look at women who need male validation like shoeonhead, who does the little girl thing because thats what they want. >>being dainty and polite I thought we got rid of the "Lolitas are supposed to be lovelies" thing like a decade ago.
This thread is like a rollercoaster ride
>>9705492>>9705493>sippy cup>tendies>immature baby shitNot all littles are Melanie Martinez clones. Or are you thinking of like, adult babies? Because that's out there even among DDLG relationships. Let me put it this way. Were you guys eating tendies, drinking out of sippy cups, and into immature baby shit when you were 13/14/15? Lots of littles only regress to that sort of mindset at most. And many of them act it out on a day to day basis, with nobody even knowing, because teenagers can have a childlike/carefree mindset while remaining mature.
>>9705516this has nothing to do with being a lifestyle lolitayou are not a lifestyle lolitayou will never be a lifestyle lolitastop bringing your filthy kink into everything because you'll never be accepted by our community
>>9705449I find that your concept of the lolita spirit aligns very closely with my own views on the fashion. I think all alternative fashion to an extent should be driven by self assurance and self expression, but I feel this way about lolita especially since it's derived from Japanese punk. There's nothing punk about dressing for the approval of others. Now that I think about it that's probably why I get so pissed at people who solely wear lolita for efame and recognition. They never truly love the fashion and drop it as soon as they get criticism or something trendier comes along. People who do that piss me the fuck off because they're so transparent and clearly are only wearing the fashion for instagram likes and external validation. That totally contradicts the roots of the fashion which I interpret as rebellion and self expression. The attitude of dressing and living for yourself and wearing the fashion as often as you possibly can is what makes a lifestyle lolita to me. 'Lolita hobbies' such as sewing, embroidery, victorian decor etc. are a part of it too but again you should never be doing them for others(unless it's your job), they should be self fulfilling and you should be doing them because you like them, not for anyone else or to be considered a 'real lifestyler' or anything (For example I fucking hate tea and I'm not about to start drinking it because it's apparently a 'lolita' thing to do) That's my own personal philosophy of the fashion I guess.
>>9703769Thanks for taking the time to answer all my questions! Reading about your cute life has made me even more excited to achieve my goals of being a lifestyle Lolita! Keep being awesome anon!
DD/LG Anon - isn’t the whole relationship between a “Daddy” (or Mommy) and Little Girl/Boy supposed to be one of, say, benevolent, caring authority? Isnt the “caretaker” supposed to be more “in charge” in a relationship, because you are modeling it partially after the relationship between a parent and child?
Someone please explain why were indulging the robot larper
>>9705533>I fucking hate tea and I'm not about to start drinking it because it's apparently a 'lolita' thing to doThis so much. I enjoy the tea parties, but hate the tea. Yet I still have to pay for it and have nothing to drink except water. Maybe I should pretend it's a dietary restriction so I can get something else.
>>9705853Can’t you just order a la carte? Lots of girls in my comm dislike tea so whenever we have a high tea meetup they mention to the organizers that they don’t want to participate in the high tea and will instead order separately. Paying for things you don’t want is just dumb.
>>9705533yup, this is a much more eloquent way of expressing what i meant! at its core, i will always view lolita as a form of rebellion. it's the perfect manifestation of self-expression, self-indulgence, and self-fulfillment. so, tying into how you mentioned your unwillingness to change your likes/dislikes for the sake of being more "lolita"--that's it, that's part of the spirit. that's being true to yourself.some people ask me why i have the weird "cottage industry" hobbies that i do because they're outdated, take a lot of time, and aren't profitable at all. but i do them because i love them, and i'd never let them go for anybody. that's my tiny rebellion.this brings about a kind of contradiction, because people might argue that "rebelling against all of the norms of being a lifestyle lolita" (e.g. not partaking in any "lifestyle" hobbies, not wearing the clothes often, being an overt kinkster like our friend in this thread) is the same kind of rebellion that we're talking about. but the line needs to be drawn somewhere--and i guess i'll continue to draw it at my 3 basic tenets, which were actively wearing the clothes, having the lifestyle lolita mindset, and partaking in at least some of the hobbies that are associated with the lifestyle.sage for blogpost, but it makes me happy to talk about this a little bit. lifestyle discussion has been uneventful until the last couple of months.
>>9705856They have a set menu, so I don't think so. It's usually smaller tea places so they have to prep for ahead of time for all of the people at our meet.
>>9705104Ew, are you ok with moms in lolita?
>>9705250It's so mind numbing to have all these useless categories for the sake of grouping people together in a niche fashion.
>>9705533>>9705969This kind of posts is why I love the lifestyle thread in the first place. Thank you for sharing your thoughts, anons.
>>9705272>weird interrogationit's a discussion/image board. you're anon. calm down, no one is actually interested in you.better to admit who you are than to live in fear of being the reason we're right and you're wrong.
>>9705492>What does being a little have at all to do with Victorian/Edwardian/Rococo.Wasn't it like.. more acceptable to rape back then?the only thing nice are the clothes. Get out of here.
>>9706036Of course not, that's why I said >before they get married.
>>9706041"All these categories"It's literally two. If that's hard for you to remember, I'm worried for you.
>>9706045It was a weird interrogation from a kinkster who was trying to prove a point. Read the thread before hopping on somebody.
>>9705969I think I draw the line at a similar point that you do. Personally, I wear the clothes several times a week and participate in discussions about the fashion, I sew some of my own lolita clothes and accessories. I spend a lot of time studying the fashion reading magazines etc. I also have a lot of 'lolita like' home decor. So overall I consider myself a lifestyler. I don't participate in all the hobbies, I don't go to meetups and again, I fucking hate tea, but I'm not going to force myself to do things I don't like or are uncomfortable with to seem 'more lolita'. I'm not going to put on a fake high pitched voice and pretend to be all lovely and sugary sweet either. It's just not me and I feel like if I was pretending to be all those things (like the girl in your pic) then I'd just be roleplaying instead of wearing a fashion and being myself, doing the things I enjoy.With kinks I think the lines get a bit blurry, I don't think lolitas all need to be prudes and never have sex but I don't think it's good to associate kinks with the fashion. Maybe I'm a prude but I think the people who publicly try and tie in their little lifestyle or their diaper fetish or whatever into lolita need to fuck off. You can wear the fashion and enjoy your other shit in private, but don't broadcast your sex life and then call yourself a lifestyler. Also if someone's kink is their lifestyle the way that anons clearly is, there's no way they can be a lifestyle lolita. DD/LG contradicts the lolita mindset because it revolves around codependency and dressing and acting a certain way for someone else. Lolita is about dressing and living for yourself. Being into kinky sex can be rebellious, but codependency and age regression isn't by design. People already think the fashion is a weird sex thing so associating that kind of stuff with the 'lolita lifestyle' is probably quite harmful too.
Why do the few of you hate tea? I find it to be among the least offensive of drinks.
>>9706076i like tea, but if we really think about it... it's leaf water. i can see how some people would be averse. the people i know who dislike it also just hate hot beverages.kind of like how i don't like coffee. it's bean juice!
>>9706099oops, misfired >>9706104
Do you sew your own nightgowns, or buy them?
>>9706210I buy them, I don't like ordering fabric online and we don't have any good enough in stores here that are nice enough
>>9706099I love tea, but I noticed that the few people who don't tend to have terrible eating habits - like preferring soda over water (and have a terrible time cutting soda out of their diet). I've had meet ups with those kinds of people and they can only drink sweetened tea or fruit tea, or will order something else (like lemonade) even though it's more expensive because it's off the service menu. I'll admit that tea is an acquired taste, especially if it's loose leaf blends, but it secretly annoys me yet makes me sad when grown adults aren't open-minded to try new things.
>>9706223I agree about your last point. My tea hating friends tell me they don't like how bitter it is, so I tell them to steep for shorter amounts of time and they refuse and tell me they like it strong. It's very bothersome.
>>9706210buy them, mostly vintage ones. i was also lucky enough to inherit some from my grandparents.(also, cutsew OPs make great nightgowns. i like being extra and wearing brand to bed sometimes.)
>>9706063I did and I think you're just a prude. I don't have any kinks or fetishes myself, but where I live, they are a dime a dozen and no one bats an eye.Go back to clutching your pearls, moron. You're on a site known for kiddie porn.
>>9706210I have both purchased and sewn my own. For someone who doesn't sew too much, it kind of wasn't worth the effort for me. If you sew a lot, then go ahead, but for me it's just better to buy. Like >>9706241 said, I sometimes wear cutsew dresses to bed. I also have a couple nightshirts from Swimmer, and the brand Gelato Pique
>>9706061Who said anything about remembering anything? There's way more than two, btw. What about the coslita/meetlita debacle?
>>9706255>this site has kiddie porn, therefore you must accept somebody else's child rape fetishnope, i'll gladly continue clutching my pearls. what's up with all of the triggered degenerates in this thread? sad you'll never be lifestylers?
>>9706099I dislike the bitter taste even though it is quite weak. I also dislike water, so tea tastes like a watered down version of bitter leaves. Altogether unpleasant, but I don't care if you drink it. I'll order the fruit teas, but even those are pretty bad because it only tastes like watered down fruit juice. Maybe I just like more in-your-face flavors.>>9706223>adults aren't open-minded to try new things.That's assuming we haven't tried it? This just makes me think of beer. It's an acquired taste, but why do I have to acquire it when I could save money by not drinking it? But for tea and beer alike, I don't like drinks that can affect my mental state.
>>9706268No, I'm saying, what are you even doing here if that is the case? If you don't like degenerates, you should probably go elsewhere. This idea that you can be moral and on 4chan is goofy as fuck.
>>9706279Hope you don't take sugar then. Or carbs, or fat, or protein, because all of those effectively affect your mental state.Besides herbal teas don't even have caffeine in them. I get you don't like it but try to think before you type.
>>9706293I never said all tea did anon. But sure. Here's your (you).
>>9706295>using a meme as an argument Lol all I'm saying is that you have plenty of reasons without jumping to the "mind altering" bandwagon. Also you didn't specify you liked certain types of tea and even specified non caffeinated fruit tea as being too watery for you. What's a person to do with that sort of info?
>>9706210I have a really cute vintage 2 piece set I was lucky enough to find in an antique shop. I also ordered this cute nightgown during 11/11 from Little Dipper. Maybe once I get my tax return in february I'll order one of their nightshirt/bloomer sets as well.
>>9706310I also have these cite as fuck btssb slippers. Bought many years ago, they are kind of grey now. Id love to get my hands on a new pair of burando slippers honestly. Id kill for burando nightgownds too honestly. But slippers will due for now since im cursed with american piggu cow tits
>>9706322Fuck dropped my image
>>9706309I said I disliked tea and why. I'll drink fruit teas, but again I still dislike it. Anon was asking as they didn't understand why. Caffeine isn't the single reason why I hate tea. That would be the taste. As is usually the reason for why any person dislikes a food or drink.
>>9706365>Caffeine isn't the single reason why I hate tea>But for tea and beer alike, I don't like drinks that can affect my mental state.But... You literally said differently...
>>9706323anon these are so cute I'm super jealous
>>9706365So do you only drink water?
>>9706650What is everyone doing for Christmas decorations and do you gulls have any change in habits when winter comes around?