/cgl/ - Cosplay & EGL

[Anonymous No.8191828]

How do you have sex with a cosplayer?

[Anonymous No.8191831]

>>8191828
put your dick in their "begina"

[Anonymous No.8191832]

>>8191828
Insert tab P into slot V, withdraw, repeat

[Anonymous No.8191845]

>>8191828
Hello /adv/!

[Anonymous No.8191850]

you get them drunk with fruity drinks

[Anonymous No.8191873]

Use the special third hole.

It's behind the knee, somewhere

[Anonymous No.8191877]

Pay them first.

[Anonymous No.8191880]

>>8191850
Fruiting drinks are so disgusting. I hate it when people get drunk off of 1% alcohol crap. Makes me think that they just want to pretend to be drunk rather than really be drunk.

[Anonymous No.8191900]

>>8191880
You've cracked the case, Watson.

[Anonymous No.8191909]

>>8191828
You become a photographer with a lot of likes on your facebook page. Then the women will come knocking.

[Anonymous No.8191911]

>>8191828
offer them a modelling contract and promise theyll be as famous as yaya or jnigz

[Anonymous No.8191914]

>>8191880
What the fuck is a fruity drink to you if it has 1%? Bunch of apple juice that's gone off?

[Anonymous No.8191920]

Pretty easy actually

Step 1 Be attractive
Step 2 Dont be Unattractive

Honestly its pretty easy, most of them are sick in the head narcissists that just want attention real bad and don't let anybody tell you any differently. "oh no I do it cause its fun and cute! not because I want other men seeing my tits hanging out and skirt hiked up in public!"

its all just an excuse to be a slut without feeling like a slut, or being accused of one. Just see through the bullshit and tell yourself they're all DTF because they are if you pursue it.

So the general nature of cons makes it easy for hookups. Probably won't see eachother in "real day to day", most of you are staying at hotels, the atmosphere is already charged and you have plenty of excuse to talk and hang out with them.

Now all of this experience is anecdotal but here's some basic Con game

>Enjoy the Con and take it in for a while
>Learn the area, This one's pretty important because its where you'll do most of your work as i'll explain
>Definitely learn the closest bar
>if you notice a cosplayer you like go talk to her
>Don't go for it if they're surrounded by guys already, you just become another face FOR THAT TIME
>Ask em about their cosplay and lightly tease them for a bit
>Eg. If they're Elsa talk about how original the cosplay is, or call her cosplay Frozen or Let it go the whole time
>Then keep the convo short and fun
>Now theres 2 paths from here, If the vibe is good suggest you both either grab Lunch, or a drink
>If not just say something like "hey I gtg cause friends etc. But we should exchange numbers to let us know if we hear about a party, grab food, etc."
>then hit up later that night all your prospect, you might get fake numbers and flakes but hey usually 2-3 bite if you were charming enough

Part 1 Will continue

[Anonymous No.8191924]

>>8191920
its amazing how a person can actually sound fat through the internet

[Anonymous No.8191931]

>>8191828
Have sex like a normal person? This is the worst question

[Anonymous No.8191939]

>>8191900
>>8191914
Even when I openly speak against pretending to be drunk instead of actually being drunk, girls blush and say otherwise.

I guess I'll always be a cringy autist who likes to try to call people out.

[Anonymous No.8191940]

>>8191920

Thread has found that one guy at every con that can be spotted crying all by himself in the main hall around 2-3:00am while all the couples head up to their rooms to fuck. Every time this anon sees a shirtless guy with rock hard abs with a pretty girl at his side anon tearily mumbles to himself 'th-th-that b-b-b-beta fuck will n-n-never l-l-l-love y-y-you'

[Anonymous No.8191941]

The same way you have sex with normal people you giant fucking retarded cocksucking mongoloid faggot.

[Anonymous No.8191949]

>>8191939
>>I guess I'll always be a cringy autist

op has come to the wrong place to ask about getting any action

[Anonymous No.8191959]

>>8191920

Cont.
(2/3)
>SO back to the instant date (dont ever call it a date or say that word out loud in front of a girl)
>If she does start leading her toward that AMAZING burrito truck/ Weird polish dude/ Bar
>As you LEAD HER ask her get to know her type questions, let her do the talking and just chime in every once in a while with a story of your own if you can relate
>Whenever she says something funny laugh and give her a light bump or tap on her arm like you would do to your friends
>Really just get her used to you touching her but dont start grabbing her ass and tits, Just a light tap here, high five, shoulder bump etc.
>Then at the food place sit NEXT TO HER NOT ACROSS and keep the whole thing going again.
>Eventually a sexual topic will come up, usually as a joke and it will happen naturally
>Get her to open up to you about something sexual
>Ex. Joke about how her outfit would look sexier on you if its skimpy
>Find a logistical reason to end up back at your hotel or hers
>Ex. "Btw we're having a party in my room you should swing by." "Wanna grab a drink and come back? I got some vodka in my hotel its really close"
>Then when youre alone you fuck you dummy

More General tips
>Be natural about all of this even if its not how you are day to day, THEY DONT KNOW THAT
>Isolating then Escalating (physically and emotionally) are Key
>Alcohol has been mankinds ally for centuries and has gotten your forefathers laid forever
>All Cute women want to fuck at a con, especially if theyre walking around in slut outfits (think Halloween an excuse to dress like a slut)
>Be a normie or seem like one
>Logistics is everything, Have a close hotel room, Know places to do stuff etc. Walking distance is golden and if you want the most success plan ahead of time to land a sweet room

I'll post my own experience in pt. 3

[Anonymous No.8191960]

Give Kelly Jean a call.

[Anonymous No.8191961]

>>8191959
spoiler alert: his own experience ends in three dead prostitutes buried under his basement

[Anonymous No.8191963]

>>8191959
I assume your tutorial aims for the low-hanging fruit?

[Anonymous No.8191969]

>>8191959
>>8191920
now i know what to look out for and turn down.

[Anonymous No.8191977]

Pretty easy task for cosfamous photogs.

[Anonymous No.8191981]

like you would normally..... are you retarded

[Anonymous No.8191992]

>>8191920
>>8191959
Holy fuck, this guy.

F5ing like the wind, let's read this faggots success stories. This is gonna be hilarious.

[Anonymous No.8192001]

>>8191828
With a 10ft pole

[Anonymous No.8192006]

>>8191959
>Be at random anime convention
>See a random Cosplayerbout 7.5-8/10 and start talking to her
>Basic shit like "hey What are you supposed to be?"
>She was supposed to be pinkie pie but looking a lot like a random party girl wearing pink
>"wow thats funny, how did you end up watching that when you're not even their intended audience, I mean you dont look like a 25 year old man at all"
>She seems receptive and laughing along
>its about 1pm and have seen a lot of stuff already suggest we grab food
>As we walk I keep the banter and convo going "where are you from? Oh i'm from this state etc."
>She mentions she likes this one EDM band and has a tattoo of em
>Ask to see it and she lifts up her skirt a bit and its right there on her upper thigh
>Touch it and she flinches a little
>"oh haha usually tattoos feel so rough sometimes but you'rs wasnt"
>"oh ya... it did at first but I just use some lotion and its fine"
>I thought i went a little far but she seemed fine
>Get to the food truck and mimic the guys European sounding accent while I order
>shes doing it too but its way shitty
>We sit down on the sidewalk and make of the people walking by together
>She is absolutely vicious btw when talking about the other female cosplayers as they walk by
>"ugh that is just so gross, nobody wants to see that"
>Mfw shes talking about another slutty costume while she is wearing a skirt thats shorter than my fucking pockets
>"haha omg she is not fooling anybody by covering her stomach with THAT" etc.
>She seems really receptive to me at this point, Returning shoulder bumps, punching my arm when I say something cheeky etc.
>Suggest we make the con a little more fun and grab a drink
>Her "ooo you know a bar anon?"
>Me "ya but the closest ones a Grill/bar so its packed right now with everyone grabbing lunch"
>Her "awww.."
>Me "BUT I do have a handle of vodka and whiskey in room, its right next to the convention center"
CONT. P4 HOLY SHIT WHY

[Enver !!52WOxLC+CKW No.8192014]

>>8192006
this is starting to sound like Exhibit: A

[Anonymous No.8192020]

>>8192006
If this doesn't end with her turning out to be a bear I'm going to be pissed

[Anonymous No.8192030]

>>8192006
What do you look like?
Tall? Good-looking? White?

[Anonymous No.8192031]

Google how to make chloroform
Works for me 9/10 times

[Anonymous No.8192035]

>>8192006
Pt 4 why

>Her "ionno, you're still a stranger and im only 20"
>me "haha werent you just down to grab a drink in a bar?
>her "mmm I don't know anon why dont we go see the show floor"
>me "nah well if you dont want to thats cool im gonna go"
>Start walking away and start texting my friend I fucking blew it and that he should have a pity shot with me
>A couple seconds later she catches up to me and says "wait... its been pretty fun so far why dont we keep having fun!"
>at this point I know its already over
>I start leading her towards the direction of my room but then says something like "ionno anon"
>I just say "I'm only gonna grab a shot and I already texted my friend to meet me there"
>she seems indecisive so I just stick out my hand and she takes it
>We get to my room and I open the door and let her in
>immediately text my friend to stay the fuck out
>"grats man hope shes fat!"
>Shes looking around the room and poking at our shit
>"hey dont touch my shit!"
> So we eventually start drinking and then I just make my move
>Throw her down on my bed and ask her if she likes music
>her "Ya sure what do you have?"
>"You like Huey Lewis and the News ?"
>"Um, they're okay. "
>MFW

BTW CHEK EM

[Anonymous No.8192052]

>>8192035
lame ass story. Also I forgot people still are treated and act like children at the age of 20 in the U.S.

[Anonymous No.8192056]

>>8191873
*4th hole

[Clockwork Loyalty !!AeVd1sjJ70p No.8192075]

>>8192035
Ending felt rushed.

Didn't even end in dubs

[Anonymous No.8192083]

>>8191924
i kek'd

[Anonymous No.8192163]

>>8191924
Anon, that's hilarious.

[Anonymous No.8192168]

>>8191828
>How do you have sex with a cosplayer?

1. You lock the target.
2. You bait the line.
3. You slowly spread the net.
4. You catch the man.

[Anonymous No.8192211]

>>8192035
>"grats man hope shes fat"

is your friend just a dick or?

[VICTIMIZER No.8192213]

Ask if she's hungry. If she says yes bend her over and feed her. If she says no move on

[Anonymous No.8192226]

Rubbing genitals together usually works

[Anonymous No.8192244]

Ah yeah, that's a difficult thing.
You see, there are some women with like 3 vaginas (also men probably).
I'm pretty sure there's one on the ribcage and another on like, the back of the knee.

If you have a bag of salty coins and milk handy you'll need to use it, otherwise it's not really sex.

[Enver !!52WOxLC+CKW No.8192261]

>>8192211
that's just bantz.

[Anonymous No.8192267]

>>8192261
well bantz is a fucking cunt

[Enver !!52WOxLC+CKW No.8192275]

>>8192267
looks like someone can't handle it

[Anonymous No.8192335]

>>8191828
I'll tell you how.
Find an average dude at an anime convention and ask him this question.
Proceed to then do the opposite of everything he says.

[Anonymous No.8192339]

rohypnol

[Anonymous No.8192351]

You finger their clitoris until the anime shoots out of their eyes.

[Anonymous No.8192421]

1. Don't be thirsty. Avoid caffinated drinks, high sodium food, LSD, MDMA and cocaine. You are going into this stone cold sober. And don't act desperate, bitches hate desperate.
2. Unclench your anus. This is a reaction that you're nervous/scared. You are not here to be sperg mcspaz, you are here to be cool. Seriously, relax that shit. Imagine trying to pass a giant turd, that's what you need to be like. Like seriously, imagine you shitting yourself in front of her. If you ain't got the confidence to shit yourself in front of her, you ain't got the confidence to bone her.
3. Ask her, So how you doing?/Are you having a good time? Be genuine, you actually do want to know how she's feeling. Avoid pick up lines, they're fucking fake and you're fucking awful if you think about using them.
4. She'll say something about how she's feeling, or respond "alright.'
5. This is the first lull. Just play chill and put the convo on her. This is the difficult part, just be chill. Your facial expressions are key here (key in general), you need to display that you're comfortable. If you're comfortable, she's comfortable. If you're giving the sperg stare, she'll want out as she should.
6. If you acted not awkward, she'll say "so uh..." and ask you a question to find out why you're there. If you acted awkward, you're the creeper.
7. Respond, ask her a question. In normal situations, you ask where she's from. In this situation, who's she cosplaying as.
8. She will leave hints on what to say with the convo, which you pick up on IF YOU'RE FUCKING PAYING ATTENTION LIKE YOU SHOULD BE. This is where creepers fail. You have to not act, but actually be genuinely interested in what she's saying. Yes, she will most likely not be interesting. You're not that interesting yourself. "But she has shit taste" You have just as shit taste, you're just more hipster than her.

TO BE CONTINUED

[Anonymous No.8192425]

>>8192421

9. When responding to her, make it seem like she's talking about the most important shit in the world. Like she's Stephen fucking Hawking of the cosplay world.
10. Eventually, the convo will get stale. You'll be bored, she'll be bored, either of you are hungry you have places to be, she has panels to go to, etc.
11 . Act like you have somewhere to be, tell her it was a wonderful conversation. "Yo, it was nice talking to you, but I gotta catch up with my buddies..." Make her feel like "damn, this guy isn't like the others this time, maybe there's something there"
12. If all went well, you got her number. If not, git gud.

Now all this assumes the girl you're talking to isn't social sperg herself. And assumes she ain't got shit to do herself, like panels, photoshoots, lunch or whatever. YOU WOULD BE AWARE OF THIS IF YOU WEREN'T A FUCKING SPERG, SHE AINT THERE JUST TO GET LAID. NEITHER SHOULD YOU, CONS AND HOTELS ARE FUCKING EXPENSIVE

tl;dr- Find out what a creeper is and be the opposite of it. And be fucking genuine you shits, we can all tell if you're phoning it in.

[Anonymous No.8192664]

>>8191828
Be Chad

[Anonymous No.8192693]

>>8192664

[Anonymous No.8192730]

>>8192244
anon i love you

[Anonymous No.8192783]

Just be attractive for fuck's sake how many times do we have to say this?

Girls throw themselves at attractive guys and everyone else gets left in the dust.

[Anonymous No.8192804]

>>8192056

8th, actually.

[Anonymous No.8192814]

>>8192804

Wait, no, I miscounted. Ninth hole. Nine.

Like golf. Tiger Woods, sex, golf, holes.

[Anonymous No.8192856]

>>8191909

God I hope this isn't true. Though I will say, in the general the cosplayers worth sleeping with are usually in relationships already.

[Anonymous No.8192937]

>>8192856
Come to Melbourne then, cosplayers here have a big fetish for cheating on their bf's as much as they can.

>>8192783
Lol good luck with that, that would a numbers game that girls can never win.

[Anonymous No.8193236]

>>8192421
Doesn't work.
>>8192425
Doesn't work.

This is as bad as the guy who gave group talks to men on basically how to rape women. This isn't how women work. Hardly even people. ESPECIALLY at a convention.

[Anonymous No.8193237]

>>8192937
What, you don't think women don't throw themselves at the most attractive guy they think they can get?

I've seen it happen first-hand multiple times.

[Anonymous No.8193264]

>>8192014
Aren't you that one cosplayer who got that Madoka Magica cosplayer laid?

[Anonymous No.8193270]

>>8192937
You mean like Kayla Erin?

[Anonymous No.8193370]

>>8191880
as a bartender I can factually tell you that many fruity drinks have an absolute fuckton of alcohol. most are primarily hard liquor creatively spiced up with some fruit juice, etc. some don't even have juice in them, they are just straight up hard liquor that has been flavored to hell and back. where the fuck are you getting your drinks mixed???

[Anonymous No.8193374]

>>8191828
Stand in front of them and press A

[Anonymous No.8193383]

>>8192020
>Kuma shock!

[Anonymous No.8193391]

Try to choose friendly dialogue options to rack up those affection points. If she responds poorly, don't sweat it! It means she's a tsundere/ (◕‿◕✿)

[Enver !!52WOxLC+CKW No.8193395]

>>8193264
I don't...think so?
My ex cosplayed Madoka but that was after we dated

[Anonymous No.8193412]

>>8193391

Meet n' Fuck /cgl/ con

[Anonymous No.8193556]

1. If you're a fat fuck, start losing weight. I am not saying this to be mean or fat shamming. First hand experience, ever since I started losing weight and slimming down a lot of chicks been talking to me where say maybe last year barelyvany women have when I was bigger.

1A. Trim/line up your facial hair or shave it. I personally get my shit either trim or lined up every two weeks.

2. Never be thirsty. Women know when men are thirsty especially good looking ones. It's like a sixth sense to them.
2A. Don't be a fucking creep who doesn't know personal space. Don't follow her or force yourself in her group of friends.

3. Talk to women like they were like your friends and have a casual chat. If you're cosplaying as somebody in your fandom or series
build a topic upon that and move forward.

4. Dress well. This doesn't mean go all out trying to upstage everyone but don't dress like a slob or if mommy and daddy still dresses you and pick out your clothes.
4A. Wash your clothes and cosplays at least two nights before the convention. Laundry boasters like those Tide pods and Purex crystals are God-Tier.

5. TAKE A GODDAMN BATH!!!!
5A. If you do shower, thank you! You're the chemo that is curing the cancer of the convention scene. Now for those who shower and take care of themselves, if you use cologne and other scented aids, don't go overboard with that shit.


BONUS 21+ TIP:
Learn to make (non)alcoholic cocktails, both fruity and non fruity. Trust me on this. Vodka, Rum, Whiskey, Tequila, and Brandy are your friends.

[Anonymous No.8193590]

>>8192211
You sound like one of those cunts who goes "Wow! I knew you could do it, I bet your one night stand is reeeallly handsome and has a huge dick! xoxoxo" and thinks that her friend's a fucking obnoxious slut.

[Anonymous No.8193615]

>>8191828
Ask if they want to have sex. If they say no, respect that and move on. If they say yes, then you will already be engulfed in tentacles.

[Anonymous No.8193753]

>>8191920
>>8191959

thats a pretty standard pick up, no reason why it wouldnt work

[Anonymous No.8193782]

>>8191880
>I pretend to like whiskey so boys will think I'm cool

[Anonymous No.8193846]

>>8192035
>>"You like Huey Lewis and the News ?"

10/10 you got me m8