Lolita Feels Thread

[Anonymous No.7502482]

Last feels thread is autosaging

>tfw spend ages putting coords together and still look shit-tier next to your lolifriends

[Anonymous No.7502507]

>tfw slowly building a wardrobe
>tfw never worn a piece of it in public
>tfw dude
>tfw no comm will ever want you

[Anonymous No.7502509]

>new to lolita
>tfw putting together first full polished coord
>tfw everything is purchased, waiting for arrival in mail
>never thought I'd drop so much money on a single outfit
>tfw start worrying about the white/offwhite/cream dilemma
>tfw shipping taking a while, losing interest
>tfw don't even get an opportunity to wear until half a year later
>tfw would have a chance to wear if everything arrives in the next two days
>tfw that's not gonna happen
It's a pretty safe coord, so I don't think the combination of it all when it arrives will really rekindle any excitement. I think this will be my first and last lolita coord; I'll probably get a couple of uses and then give up and sell off all of the burando since I'd rather spend on a lot of other J-fashion. Guess I'm just more quantity over quality.

[Anonymous No.7502515]

>>7502509
I feel the same way, anon. Lolita is so much money for only a few outfits.

[Anonymous No.7502540]

>>7502507
Are you me?

[Anonymous No.7502548]

>accidentally max out all $800 on my credit because I needed to afford food/bills and was too much of a chicken shit to ask my parents for money
>will take a couple months to pay off
>freak out thinking I won't be able to grab CDC
>tfw AP's CDC release isn't until June/July

[Anonymous No.7502554]

>>7502540
Atleast I'm not the only one in hell. Seriously tho, I don't know how I keep justifying to myself that the whole thing isn't a waste of money.

[Anonymous No.7502558]

>>7502507
>>7502540
>>7502554
Why do you guys need a comm? Just be lone brolitas, who the hell cares!

[Anonymous No.7502567]

>>7502558
...seriously though. What the fuck is wrong with people and why do they need stranger validation for EVERYTHING?

[Anonymous No.7502570]

>>7502554
Lolita is almost always a waste of money regardless, it's a very expensive hobby and as long as you're not swimming in debt and wearing dumb frilly shit makes you happy it doesn't really matter.

[Anonymous No.7502577]

>tfw 98 cm bust
>Impossible to find blouses that fit

[Anonymous No.7502581]

>>7502577
You're not trying.

[Anonymous No.7502583]

>>7502570
Every time I read about how much these girls are spending on clothing that doesn't even have a real value if you keeping wearing it, color runs, etc-- I cringe. It's not even worth it. You need a set of shoes and bags for every dress and I can't imagine living such a sad life of thousands of dollars on dresses that you can't justify wearing past a certain age. I can look at lolita fashion and see how pretty it is, but it just can't be worth it.

[Anonymous No.7502590]

>>7502583
This is why I only buy simple/non print items

[Anonymous No.7502595]

>>7502583
Bad b8, m8.

I will vaguely respond with something though a question. Why do you baiters always use the arguement that it's unjustifiable beyond a certain age? That would imply that lolitas care about conventional fashion rules, which they don't. It's just puzzling and I don't get why you would think that people would care about conventional fashion/social norms since they so obviously don't by wearing it in the first place.

[Anonymous No.7502605]

>>7502583
Lolita prices are pretty steep compared to normalfag stuff, but if you know where to buy and where to cut corners without looking like shit, building a decent wardrobe won't actually cost you thousands of dollars. The most I've spent on a single piece is about 180 and my wardrobe basically revolves around two pairs of shoes.

[Anonymous No.7502613]

>>7502605
I know girls who wear more expensive brands that cost about the same as lolita. Shit like $100 highlighter pink sweatpants, they look like shit to me but I don't care, I look like shit to them, but I'm happy so I'm going to buy what I like.

[Anonymous No.7502614]

>>7502558
>implying you don't enough weird looks by just wearing lolita in public non-lolita friendly places.

[Anonymous No.7502616]

>>7502583
>no real value
Lots of shit has "no real value."
lrn2economics
I'm sorry for you though, sounds like you really like lolita but can't afford it yourself.

[Anonymous No.7502615]

>>7502595
It's not even bait. Anon is just saying lolita is really damn expensive, which is it. I know a lot of people but second hand, but it's still a lot of money. Stop calling b8 when people differ in opinions. They didn't even mention age play.

[Anonymous No.7502618]

>>7502614
You can still wear it to cons though. I'm a lone loli and wear lolita to every con, and I have formally refused to join my local comm(I think they got mad at me though) I'm just not interested in socializing though. For you however, wearing it to a local con could help you meet the comm and hit it off.

[Anonymous No.7502620]

>>7502614
>implying you don't get enough weird looks by just wearing lolita in public non-lolita friendly places.

I'm just gonna go be an attention whore on Tumblr or something.

[Anonymous No.7502623]

>>7502615
There's a lot of bitter comments in there that people will jump on, why mention them? It seems like bait if you're going to try add in comments about things that you know piss people off.

I agree with >>7502616 anon sounds bitter as fuck about not being able to buy lolita.

[Anonymous No.7502624]

>>7502618
I've been meaning to wear it to a Con. I think I'll do just that.

[Anonymous No.7502632]

>good friend recently discovered lolita and fell instantly in love after (thankfully) some research
>slight chubs, massive jugs, self esteem issues
>loaded as hell
>buys metric shitton of AP and IW
>fits, but massive boobloaf
>even with binder
>friend either does not notice or pretends not to
>want to tell her that she needs to look into more boob-friendly brands because she looks like stringed ham
>but don't want to make her feel worse about herself

I don't even know man

[Anonymous No.7502633]

Girls spend thousands on ugly shit purses and sweatpants and lolitas get hated on for spending money to look like fucking fabulous princesses? Ok m8
I'm sure your cosplays aren't cheap either and you wear those about twice right

[Anonymous No.7502634]

>>7502595
I don't think it's bait. I mostly agree with them in all honesty

[Anonymous No.7502638]

>>7502634
Why would someone care what your opinion is about their hobby?

The same shit can be said about anything, brand name purses, cosplay, even stupid hobby shit like stamps or whatever. There's nothing with intrinsic value othet than food, water, shelter etc. I don't give a shit about anyone doing what makes them happy as long as they're not bitching about putting their hobby over other things. Like, I can understand that it's annoying to watch girls max out their CC and have to live off ramen for 3 months, but most people don't do that, so who cares?

[Anonymous No.7502639]

>tfw only had one friend that i could talk to about lolita and jfashion, she understood it and didnt think it was weird
>tfw she was my best friend and we knew each other for 7 years
>tfw we went through everything together, picked out outfits for each other
>tfw she killed herself last week because she suffered from bipolar disorder

[Anonymous No.7502644]

>>7502638
Judging by the replies I believe people do care, heh. No one's saying they shouldn't pursue their hobby, only that it personally doesn't seem worth it to me. Do whatever you like.

[Anonymous No.7502645]

>>7502639
I'm really sorry, anon.

[Anonymous No.7502646]

>>7502639
Oh... im so sorry to hear that anon.

[Anonymous No.7502648]

>>7502633
Not only do they spend thousands on them, they are scared to carry them in case someone steals them or they get dirty or wet. I bought a jacket from Ralph Lauren because my mum insisted that it means good quality, but the pockets are ripping apart inside and the seams on the collar are coming undone slowly. Basically you're just paying for brand name, don't let /fa/ hear though, they'll have an aneurysm.

I never had this problem with lolita, and I wear it toned down every day.

[Anonymous No.7502647]

>tfw the brand designers will die in your lifetime

[Anonymous No.7502651]

>>7502639
shit anon, that's heavy stuff. I'm sorry.

[Anonymous No.7502653]

>>7502632
does she have a tumblr? tell her anonymously

[Anonymous No.7502655]

>>7502647
I don't have anything against AP but sometimes I wonder what would happen to the brand if the designers died in a car accident or w/e and what all the AP girls would do

[Anonymous No.7502665]

>>7502605
>>7502613

>Lolita prices are pretty steep compared to normalfag stuff
I don't know. Maybe if you're looking at forever 21 or buy everything off of taobao, but compare secondhand to not-dirt-cheap normal fag clothes, it's not that far off. This is assuming you're getting the simpler dresses, not DDC or Sheep's Garden or something.
In Land's End there was this cute floral dress featured on a mannequin. It was $130. Same as a good deal on a simple JSK.
Abercrombie and Fitch sells really basic cutsew shirts for $40-$60
Banana Republic's and Coldwater Creek's tops are $60-$90, and their dresses only rarely touch below $100. Most are in the mid hundreds.

While you're going to see lolita dresses crest $200 more often than mid-tier regular clothes, if you're being smart with your purchases, your wardrobe shouldn't be much more than a women who shops at these stores. Heck, lolitas are very particular with their purchases and usually buy with coords in mind. A lolita's closet is going to be smaller and much more cohesive than an upper-middle-class woman's closet.

Lolita isn't for the lower class or for even the lower-middle class. But those who say that lolita is utterly frivolous is spending too much time looking at the Cat's Tea Party auction and disregarding the solid colored JSK sales.

[Anonymous No.7502670]

>poorfag
>can't lose weight
>would never be able to dress in lolita and feel ok with it anyway

[Anonymous No.7502672]

>>7502665
Wow. You know you can look good without spending hundreds of dollars on a single piece of clothing. For the most part, I would spend some money on shoes or another statement piece. The rest is inexpensive. Or I make my hair and neck accessories.

[Anonymous No.7502689]

>be me
>be into goth loli/aristocrat
>have amazing long-term boyfriend
>we live together
>boyfriend is short, skinny fits into and likes Japanee aristo brands
>buy a shit ton of BPN for him recently because it's $30 per item, just because
>don't tell him about it, want to surprise him with new spring clothing
>he seems stressy lately
>we have a fight
>breaks up with me for pretty much no reason and decides he's moving out suddenly

w-what will I do with all this boy burando? IT WON'T FILL THIS HOLE IN MY HEART!
>get drunk from sads
>looking on CC at lolita
>decides to buy a bunch of stuff in a depressed drunken stupor
>mfw it's all sweet lolita I've never wanted to wear

I'm hoping he's just super stressed out and needs some time apart or something...it was really out of the blue and I totally didn't see it coming. Also, prepare for a fairly large sweet lolita sales post in the near future. I might try to wear it but I'm not too into sweet...

[Anonymous No.7502699]

>>7502672
I don't think it should be about the price. Peoples' fashion sense isn't always determined by prices. With lolita specifically, it's niche and you can't get anything even similar to it for less than what it sells, for, even in mainstream fashion people will sometimes want something that they like the look of regardless of the price. It's just personal preference. You may look good to yourself in cheaper items but other people may not feel the same way about the clothing as you do. You just have to put it into perspective, we all have different tastes. Not everyone wants that burando title, and not everyone buys outfits they hate just to save money.

[Anonymous No.7502703]

a thread by the shirring came out on one of my jsks and its just making me feel terrible. It wasn't even that expensive but it just makes you feel bad,you know? i feel like i should just sell my stuff off.

[Anonymous No.7502742]

>>7502689
I feel you, anon, I feel you.

[Anonymous No.7502883]

>>7502689
(i just love boystyle in general, i am a grill but i only feel pretty when i'm like a boy...and still find myself to be really ugly because dysmorphia)
Maybe he really does need some time apart. If he was stressy there must be a reason. Just do not cling too much on the idea of him coming back,if he doesn't it'll only hurt more. But you'll surely find someone who will love you and maybe even be a cutie in boy burando. Please don't be sad anon
(sorry for my shitty english i'm french)

[Anonymous No.7502890]

>have a ugly horseface/manface with a large nose,dark circles and deep wrinkles under eyes
>can't get rid of wrinkles (nor my entiere face)
>feels ok in ouji/vk/... an boy cosplays
>sold all my feminine clothes
>dress like a boy,got a emo haircut and pastel blue hair
>people actually tell me i look super cute
>i actually feel a little better about it but can't stop drooling over natural simple colored wigs,old school lolita and feminine J fash' stuff
>mfw i'll never have the balls to dress in lolita or in cute clothes
>mfw the other girls will always be prettier than me in any girl fashion
>mfw i can't be comfortable in girl fashion and only feel comfortable in boy stuff
>ok.jpg

[Anonymous No.7502899]

>>7502890
That reminds me of inuashley who is pretty damn hot as a vk boy/ouji style but just gross and awkward as a Lolita. Sometimes you can't do both. I look better as a boy myself .

[Anonymous No.7502914]

>>7502890
You could try aristo or gothic lolita, case of manface/ sharp features can work with those styles.

[Anonymous No.7502922]

>>7502899
Woah,I never saw her in boystyle,googled it and she's pretty awesome. My face isn't like hers at all tho,I have a upturned nose,little but kinda large in front,big green eyes,a chin kinda long (size of my thumb),my face is narrow but i got baby cheeks. Also well,wrinkles/dark circles/...
But I feel way better as a boy,I don't even really worry about makeup like I used to when i tried lolita,fairy kei,...and i actually can look at myself and be like "i'm not so bad"

[Anonymous No.7502925]

>>7502914
I love aristo but oh dear i wish i could work cute styles

[Anonymous No.7502955]

>>7502632
>boobloaf
Tell her to wear a cardigan or a bolero.
Chances are if she has boobloaf she's got hamsteak arms anyway. I know the feeling, trust me, it works very well and it's extremely easy to shoop in pictures compares to straight blouses with boobloaf.

[Anonymous No.7502965]

>>7502925
Lovelylor dresses fairly well and she's not a moderate case of horse face.

[Anonymous No.7502979]

>Down to a 96cm bust
>was previously 110 when I started wearing lolita
>can fit in a lot more shit now by bust measurement
>waist completely disproportionate
>Most everything stops at 76-78cm, waist 82cm.
>So close, but so far.
>endless sea of full back shirring

[Anonymous No.7502982]

>>7502979
Have you considered corsets or shapewear?

[Anonymous No.7502984]

>>7502979
Invest in a good underbust corset if you're not planning on losing more weight or if your waist won't go any lower.

[Anonymous No.7502987]

>>7502689
If it doesn't work out, just wear the clothes yourself

[Anonymous No.7502989]

>>7502890
Do old school lolita but in a Mana way

[Anonymous No.7502992]

>>7502689

I love boystyle and aristo so if you need to sell the BPN I'd be interested.

[Anonymous No.7502995]

>>7502979
I'm sure you could stretch out the max by a few cms anon...

[Anonymous No.7503033]

>be 25, rest of comm is teens
>have several homemade pieces because very tall
>every time I wear one to a meet I get
>"anon if I give you $10 will you make me one too"

[Anonymous No.7503036]

>>7502984
I've got an underbust, but it's Timeless trends, so it does very little for cinching, and is better suited for shapewear. I'm still losing, but once I get to where I want to be, I'm considering getting a custom-made one that will actually bring my waist in further.

[Anonymous No.7503200]

>this new motherfucking captcha
Moots a jew and wants money.

[Anonymous No.7503204]

This new captcha is impossible on my mobile. I can't quote anyone and I'm going crazy. What the fuck is going on??

[Anonymous No.7503220]

>>7503204
moot wants everyone to buy a 4chan pass cause he's a jew

[Anonymous No.7503222]

>tfw friends are massive weebs but won't touch lolita
All these stories about people and their friends getting into lolita together or getting a friend into it and I can't even make a loli friend with a whole group of weebs. Why?
They'll wear comic book and anime shirts, mixtures of clothing from Walmart and the 1/2 off nerd stuff bin at Hot Topic. I've seen some in fedoras, my God, but no kawaii princessu friend for me.
I know they'd probably be ita at first, but they could learn and we'd both grow and be pretty together.

[Anonymous No.7503422]

I desperately need a job and it's killing me on the inside that I just can't get one. I'm now 21 and have never had a job and have only gotten one interview, where the employer never even planned to give me a chance since I had no experience.
I fill out every application I can on five different sites, even made a resume to show 'initiative', though I have no actual work experience, just volunteering. I even go to the places personally to ask for physical applications only to be told it's all done online, always ask to see the manager when turning in physical applications, dress nicely, am professional, polite, energetic to make a good impression, always call or even sometimes walk in days later to ask if my application has been looked at, only to be turned away and told 'no, not yet,' and then walking off feeling like an irritating insect on these people who actually contribute something to society. Never get that call back.
I'm currently living with my bf and he pays for everything, things I like, even lolita on occasion because he's nice. I feel gross and worthless for not being able to even just get an interview, while I just leech. I'm sick of the "oh, but you're still in school!" "The job markets are just totally saturated right now!" and "oh, but you have a loving bf who wants to take care of you!" asspat excuses. What am I supposed to do until I've graduated? What about WHEN I've graduated? Yeah, it's California, but other people seem to be getting jobs just fine; each "New job, yay!!!" post I come along is another burn to any optimism I have left. And no, my bf doesn't want to be supporting himself and his unemployed gf, it's not like he does it for fun.
I don't know what I'm doing wrong. I'm the jobless loser in my group of friends playing off of the "Oh yeahhh, I have a bf to take care of me, teehee!" bullshit so everyone else doesn't realize I feel like a lazy useless waste of space.

[Anonymous No.7503425]

>tfw i don't have a wide range knowledge about lolita

[Anonymous No.7503428]

>>7503222

Umm, anon...

>comic book and anime shirts
>Walmart
>nerd stuff bin at Hot Topic

>aka cheap weeby shit

what in all of this makes you think they would bother with expensive frilly dresses?

[Anonymous No.7503430]

>>7502665
fucking this

pic related my feels

[Anonymous No.7503439]

>>7503422
sounds really similar to a situation one of my friends is experiencing - what are you in school for, anon?

[Anonymous No.7503448]

>>7503422
What part/city in Cali do you live anon? Some places really do have job markets that are that saturated.
For comparison, the city I live in is quite big but not densely populated, and that pertains to business as well. Meaning a new business will open up every now and then, so I think it's super easy to find a job where I live as long as you're quick.
However, compared to a city like, let's say LA which also big but much more densely populated there won't be as many businesses opening so it's going to be tougher right?
I really do wish you the best of luck though anon. You sound like you try a lot harder and are more well put together compared to other people around your age (like me tbh). Be sure to ask your colleagues and friends around if they have heard of any possible job openings and such.

[Anonymous No.7503451]

>no job
>no money
>boyfriend left me
>family hates me
>can't afford apartment
>no where to go
>no one to turn to
I think it's time for me to put on my best coord, buy some opium and just disappear. It's been a good run guys. I'll leave muh burando to /cgl/ in my will.

[Anonymous No.7503463]

>>7503451
Just start camwhoring or get a sugar daddy. I think at least a half of /cgl/ does it

[Anonymous No.7503468]

>>7503422
I live in CA and had a hard time finding a job too. I applied to McDick's 7 times and I only got an interview when I put that I knew someone who worked there (put her name there).
I think the other thing that helped me was a ton of availability. Try to make all your classes on two or three days so you have at least some morning availability and have weekends open for work.
Like yeah, fast food sucks ass, but it's a job. That at least gives you experience.

[Anonymous No.7503469]

I'm addicted to Lolita window-shopping. I browse Y!J, mbok, LSE, Lolita Sales, egl_comm_sales and Lacemarket almost every day. (Closet Child and takoyaki_co when I receive the updates; I don't bother with Furunrun and the like because their websites are impossible to navigate)

Most of the time, I don't buy anything because I'm looking for very, very specific pieces. But when I find somebody's WTB and remember seeing the piece somewhere in particular, I take up a few minutes, find the link again, and sent it to him/her. I do that even for complete strangers.

When I find somebody's dream piece and message them about it, their answers always make me feel all fuzzy inside~

[Anonymous No.7503475]

>>7503463
Nia does.

[Anonymous No.7503479]

>>7503475
>>7503463
I don't think I can do that, how the hell could I even start something like that? I'm kind of a hikkikomori. I'm so lost without my darling...well not mine anymore. I'm so worried and scared.

[Anonymous No.7503480]

>>7502482
>Turning 20 tomorrow
>will never look cute enough for Sweet and still won't now as time goes
> Don't even like Gothic or Classic
>Making up for it with classic sweet
>i know there are 20+ sweets but muh genetics

[Anonymous No.7503481]

>>7503479
You sign up, set up a paypal account and then a slutty cosplay and have betas give you money.

[Anonymous No.7503482]

>>7503481
Sign up where exactly? Sorry...I'm a bit desperate and drunk.

[Anonymous No.7503483]

>>7503482
camwhore website

[Anonymous No.7503490]

>>7503036
Get the Josephine from Isabella Corsetry

[Anonymous No.7503574]

Fucking depression destroying my life

I'm such an underachiever. I have so many dreams I struggle to pursue because most of the time I'm feeling depressed as fuck because of how lonely and weird I am.
>26yo
>only had a job for a year and I quit because I just couldn't stand my boss being shit to me
>never had a bf or even kissed a guy
>have this idea that no one would like me because of how ugly I am and because no one would put up with someone inexperienced my age
>go to conventions always alone, have fun but in the end I feel depressed that not even with people like me I can find somewhere I belong
At least I'm finally graduating from college this year after fucking up really badly.

[Anonymous No.7503580]

I absolutely love AP's dresses, and I actually adore those baby-doll type (not sure if that's the right term) ones, but I'm 6 ft tall and I'll never be able to wear any of them. Stop getting shorter and shorter AP please.

also a not so much lolita related feel

> tfw Whitey Mc White
> tfw you tan with the speed of light

I don't even like warm weather or the sun, I can't stand it, but I end up spending a short while in the sun and bam tanned face and whatever else was in the sun. Is being able to only need one shade of foundation/bb cream really too much to ask?

[Anonymous No.7503584]

>>7503574
You sound like me in four years

[Anonymous No.7503586]

>>7503584
You should do everything you can to prevent that. I wish I was 22 again.

[Anonymous No.7503597]

I know there's two giant spiders in my closet and I need to get something from there.

I either gas my wardrobe and with it the spiders
or
Keep the door open so they can come out and hide somewhere else in the house.

It's Sophie's choice all over again.

[Anonymous No.7503715]

>>7503597
Anon do you realize what you are saying? You are a fucking God among spiders. You could capture them in glass jars and spray the insides with febreez and let them suffer a slow delicious smelling death. Do not fear them anon. That is YOUR closet and it is one of the most important places in your home base. Do not let a measely bug conquer it. You are the queen. Show them no mercy. Godspeed anon.

[Anonymous No.7503734]

>>7503597
Capture them and set them free

[Anonymous No.7503737]

>>7503574

Aw, anon I know this is easier said than done (depression is a fucking bitch, yo) but don't ever think nobody will ever care about you whether it's friendship or romantically because of those things. People probably avoid you because they may find you intimidating by your body language. Sometimes, especially with an incredibly pessimistic mindset (along with anxiety and whatnot) we don't really know how others see us even if we think we are trying to look and be approachable.

Sometimes people may be intimidated, some may just be in your shoes and don't want to bother you, you may not realize yourself actively avoiding people and social situations, the reasons are endless to as why you can't find a boyfriend or even friends.

You don't even seem like you're not even proud of graduating college, which that is a HUGE accomplishment and you should definitely be proud of yourself!

If you aren't already in therapy I'd really suggest that if you can afford it. Or perhaps maybe a free/cheap local support group. Learning to love yourself and being confident is the key to forming healthy relationships. You can do this anon, I believe in you!

[Anonymous No.7503741]

>>7503737
Also *You seem like you're not even proud of graduating college* sorry for the mistake.

[Anonymous No.7503773]

My best friend died last night. I don't even know how, she was fine when I saw her on Wednesday. I'm worried she killed herself, which would be (and I don't mean this in the tumblr "this bothers me" sense, but in the "I am really thrown into a dark place" sense) very triggering for me. I've had suicidal ideations and actions in the past and I've been barely holding them off with medication and therapy, and now I kind of feel so numb and empty.
>to make this lolita related
One of my reoccurring thoughts is "who should I leave my dresses to when I off myself?"

[Anonymous No.7503814]

>>7503468
I was having a bit of trouble finding work too(part of it was being really depressed for awhile and other junk) I actually ended up with a job at Disney. I'm in quick food services(which is like the equivilant of fast food anyway) but I actually don't mind it much since my leads are pretty nice and competent. Hours kind of suck ATM though bit every bit helps.

[Anonymous No.7503826]

>>7503422
You could always volunteer at a smaller food pantry? When I volunteered at one out of an inner city church basement, they ended up letting us take a bag of day old pastries or sweets home. Good experience and you get some food out of it!

[Anonymous No.7503831]

>>7503773
I am so sorry for your loss. Make sure to talk to someone you trust about how you are feeling. Love and light.

[Anonymous No.7503833]

>>7503574
If you really don't mind kissing anybody and you're not fat or at least have big boobs, go to a big rave, get drunk/high, dance, don't be picky and kiss whatever drunk guy who wants to get into your pants?

[Anonymous No.7503845]

>>7503833
I don't see the appeal of doing that.

[Anonymous No.7503848]

>>7503833
Yeah that doesn't sound worth it. It might even make her feel more useless

[Anonymous No.7503856]

>>7502689
Ill buy it off you if ya needs to unload.

[Anonymous No.7503867]

>>7502899
Yeah, she makes a pretty hot man! I always feel bad for her, because she has such lovely Lolita outfits, but they just don't look right on her. I wish she would stick to boystyle.

[Anonymous No.7503871]

>>7502965
I personally think she would look better in boystyle, too, but she does pretty well working with what she has, all things considered.

[Anonymous No.7503874]

Things have been looking up. I have been spending a lot of my time with a lolita friend for a little while for she chats with me often and complained about how her ex-bf did not spend a lot of time with her. Me being my dumbself, didnt pick up the multiple hints she gave me that indicated she was interested in me.

Well, she finally made things clear and made the first move. I am happy to be dating her and I hope im not just a rebound.

[Anonymous No.7503894]

>>7503833
Watch an episode of "what happens in Kavos" on YouTube and you'll see how much of a miserably shitty idea that is.
Besides, misery floats.

[Anonymous No.7503976]

>>7502655
...hire another designer....

[Anonymous No.7503991]

>>7503490
Thanks! I'll bookmark this for future reference!

[Anonymous No.7504008]

>>7503894
that was a hilarious watch, Thanks anon.

[Anonymous No.7504011]

>>7503469
I remember someone did that for my dream dress. they linked to an old rakuten page where it was sold weeks before. (I had noticed it too but was too late) It was disappointing.

[Anonymous No.7504190]

>>7503422
Don't worry. I live in California, and it took me two years to find a job after I was laid off. And the only jobs are part time. It's not just you, I have years of experience and solid work history, plus vocational training and I still had to downgrade to a shitty part time retail job.

[Anonymous No.7504217]

>>7502689
If you sell BPN I would be interested too!
And sorry to hear about your bf. hope things get sorted out.

[Anonymous No.7504245]

>>7503894
what have you done anon
this is disgusting but i cant turn away

[Anonymous No.7504255]

>>7504245
I know how you feel anon, it's like a traincrash that won't stop happening but I can't turn away from it

[Anonymous No.7504260]

>>7503422
I know that feeling
>Boyfriend works minimum wage and goes to college, while I just recently got foodstamps to help feed us.
>close friend keeps pushing college and getting a job on me whenever we chat.
>Tells me I shouldn't use foodstamps and to just get a job. Makes it sound like jobs grow on trees.
>her parents just bought her a car and have money for college when she graduates.
>I want to break the monitor when talking to her because I'm tired of hearing her "woe is me" shit
>feel worthless

[Anonymous No.7504342]

>>7503475
Ugh. She's not even cute.

[Anonymous No.7504346]

>>7503715
Just capture them and let them go outside. Don't torture them like a fucking sociopath. I hate people like you the most

[Anonymous No.7504350]

>>7503475
>shippou
omfg lol
is this before or after they broke up and he threatened to break into her house and murder her?

[Anonymous No.7504370]

>>7504245
"Every worker in Kavos has done at least one shot of piss"
wwwhaaaaattt

[Anonymous No.7504442]

>at a convention, first day
>wearing a maid outfit, typical weeb shit
>in a panel room, waiting for it to start
>volunteer who is badge checking the room stops me
>"I bet YOU are going to the lolita tea party sunday, right??"
>say yes
>"oh, well I wish I could go. I don't own any lolita!"
>"until I get my Celestia cosplay, that is!!"
>oh

[Anonymous No.7504454]

>>7502583
I look at it this way:

Normal clothing is cheap, but I find that I'm shopping more often for everyday clothing. During each shopping trip I can spend around 100-200 dollars on a few items, but these items get worn out fast or ruined because I'm not careful. I also shop more often and in bulk when purchasing regular clothing.

With lolita, since I already have my basics, I spend 100-300 dollars on a dress, blouse of bolero every so often. My dresses are in great condition because I value them more. I've also never felt self-conscious of how I look when I dress in lolita.

I kind of view it as a hobby as well. I know a few people who spend thousands of dollars on sports equipment. I'm all for doing what makes you happy as long as you aren't hurting other people in the process.

[Anonymous No.7504484]

>>7503586

Not that Anon, but got the same feeling as >>7503584

So, how do I prevent this?

[Anonymous No.7504617]

Tfw Friend expresses interest in cosplaying series together. Says I will look cute as main character, and she wants to cosplay one of two side characters. Bbbbut don't you want to go as other main character? Doesn't even matter though she will look awesome as either of them and I'm so happy right now!

[Anonymous No.7504632]

>>7504484
Oldfag here who has been there, done that.

Seriously, it's like that Bill Murray movie What About Bob. Baby Steps. You have to take baby steps and be happy with every little achievement however small. Success breeds more success which then leads to confidence that leads on to kicking ass.

Don't look at what you don't have or what is shit. Look at what is good and what you are good at. Set little goals for yourself each day, even if they are minor or silly. When you achieve them, stand back and go "yeah, I did that. What else can I do?". Then set another, then another, then another. If one fails then it failed, don't dwell in it and set another. It could be something as minor as "today I'm going to wash the dog".

After a while of little goal setting you will be in a different mindset and things will seem to happen on their own. The trick is not to fall into the blackness when something goes wrong.

[Anonymous No.7504642]

>tfw the only lolita you have, both regular skirts, are tea length
>tfw you have to hike up the petti to boobs
>tfw midget
>tfw you will never afford based short AP

[Anonymous No.7504653]

>>7504484
26yo here

There's no magical solution if you're depressed. I just say focus on your studies and try to get a job if you don't have one. Try to be more social as well.

I don't really know.

[Anonymous No.7504662]

>>7504653
seeing a doctor and getting pills can help.
sure as fuck did in my case

[Anonymous No.7504736]

>>7503574
>never had a bf or kissed a guy
>have this idea that no one would like me because of how ugly I am and because no one would put up with someone inexperienced my age

Those two hit me too hard, anon.

I'm going to be 23 in about a month and suddenly almost everyone but my very best friend are getting married, finding bfs and having children already. I know I should take it slow, but I wonder if I'm even competent enough to love someone at all. I get scared of it and feel that my main flaw is that I'm inexperienced with even mundane things like holding hands.

The one guy that was interested in me reached out to grab my hand to look at my nail polish the other day and I couldn't handle it. I just couldn't. My hands were just shaking afterward and I tried really hard not to scream at him for it. Now I can't even look him in the eye for more than three seconds. I'm warming up to him more, but I don't want to go out with him. Even after denying his first mention at dating not even a month after we met I just keep telling myself that I couldn't burden him with my shortcomings.

Not to say that I don't like being alone all the time, but I'm scared that if I get a bf I'll let him down because I'm incompetent in social interaction or things not Chemistry or vidya related, which is luckily what his life revolves around too, but he's a very popular person.

I'm just tired of tiptoeing around things, and really just want to get it off my chest before I do something.

Sage for not /cgl/. Sorry.

[Anonymous No.7504782]

Noticed a small run on the sleeve and dirt stains everywhere on my favourite blouse.
I didn't even get a chance to wear it out yet.

[Anonymous No.7504796]

There's a mlp con happening on the bay area (California) and they have an.actual guy doing tattoos there. What the fuck has happened to this generation of cons ?

[Anonymous No.7504798]

>>7504796
Oh crap. Misfire. I'm so sorry fellow Lolitas. How do I delete my post?

[Anonymous No.7504863]

>tfw you descide to try sewing tissue knit
> almost done with tank top
> can't judge stretch/slinky-ness for shit
> mess up royally

Why don't I just stick to cotton/woven/non slinky fabric? Why do I do this to myself?

[Anonymous No.7504873]

>>7504736
>friends married, having children at 23
>taken as a sign of personal inadequacy
Oh, my dear anon. You have things so very backwards and you don't even realize it.

[Anonymous No.7504883]

> want to be lolita so bad
> buy dress, thinking I sneak just under the measurements
> boobloaf
> oh I'll just start dieting while putting together an outfit
> never find anything that works, loose job, loose all money
> Think about selling the one thing I was really happy to save up for
> never going to get full price because I wore it once to a wedding

So yea who wants to buy Innocent Worlds faerietale jsk

[Anonymous No.7504886]

>>7504883
>> never going to get full price because I wore it once

[Anonymous No.7504887]

>>7504873
Maybe they aren't 23 but she is? I mean, it seems very likely.

[Anonymous No.7504890]

>>7504883
>>7504886
You wore it to a wedding?

I feel a little bad for you, anon, so I'll be generous and offer $80.

[Anonymous No.7504892]

>recurring subconscious feeling that i'll always be a sub-par lolita since i'm black

[Anonymous No.7504894]

>>7504873
Yeah, my friends are all getting married too, but they are all in their mid to late 20s. I'm getting married myself! I'm 25 and my fiancé will be 29. I know there's no way I'm having kids until I'm at least 30 and have done some sort of traveling. I know the same is true for most of my friends.

[Anonymous No.7504917]

>>7504736
Oh anon, everyone is insecure at first and feels that way. Hell, I'm married and I often ask myself if my husband will be let down if I do this instead of that, say this, wear that, if I try to sneak vegetables into his lunch since he won't eat them, etc. It's perfectly normal for people who aren't #yolo douchers.

Just don't feel rushed because of it. My mom had me at 35, and got married to my dad six years before and people STILL said how "early" it was. Everyone has their own time. You just concentrate on getting a nice career or whatever it is that you want out of life and be social, and boyfriends will come. Don't tiptoe around anyone either, it's better for someone to know what you're really like than to hold back and give them a surprise when you're already dating. Not because you're bad or anything but because you're more likely to find someone who likes you just the way you are that way, without any of you needing to pretend. And trust me, when you do it's the best feeling ever, you're not just boyfriend and girlfriend but also best friends. It's worth the wait and being potentially a little silly.

[Anonymous No.7504976]

>>7504886
Its more worriesome that she stretched out the dress when wearing it at said measurements with boobloaf.

[Anonymous No.7505165]

>>7504736
I wouldn't feel to bad. My oldest brother and I both didn't get married until after we hit 25. There's no point in feeling rushed to big life changes likes triage and kids. I'm 29 and just now pregnant with my first child. I think my brother was 27 or so when his wife got pregnant(he's 8 years older then me)

I'm glad I waited because it gave me more time to mellow out, mature, and get my life a little more together.

Just go at your own pace and don't feel the need to rush. I was actually the first of my friends to get married and my closer friends are in long term relationships. Everybody just has their own pace they go out. You'll eventually find your own.

Also, not really Lolita related, but a coworker saw me in the maturity uniform, and asked me if the baby's father is in the picture. I asked my friends and we all agreed that it was a pretty awkward question to ask. Especially since I was wearing my wedding ring. Apparently she thought I was in my early 20's and made an assumption that I was single or something.

[Anonymous No.7505171]

>>7505165
>triage
Duh fuck, I meant marriage.

[Anonymous No.7506601]

>tfw active in my city's music scene. Love metal.
>tfw trashy metal/rockabilly/goth chicks always give me shit.

On the upside, guys don't give a shit and I'm good friends with a lot of local bands. But.. I still just want a nice lady friend to go to gigs with.
>;~;

[Anonymous No.7506638]

>>7506601
Where do you live, anon? I know your pain.

[Anonymous No.7506649]

>>7506638
Brisbane, Australia.

You'd think that with the huge variations in alt clothing, people would be a bit more open-minded.

[Anonymous No.7506652]

>>7503574
I am thirty and in a similar position. Good job almost finishing college though. Do you have someone to talk to about this? Maybe they can help. Don't worry about troubling your friends, friends help each other.

I would be happy to have a friend to talk to. Everyone moved away years ago. someone to date would be a goal much higher than I expect for me myself though.

[Anonymous No.7506657]

>want to get into ouji
>large hips look ridiculous in pants

[Anonymous No.7506665]

A while ago I agreed to help this dude with his first lolita outfit, and I was excited for it at first, but now I'm just regretting it.
It's like this dude doesn't know how to use the internet at all or something.
>"Anon, can you link me the dress that I wanted to order?"
>"Anon can you find me a petticoat?"
>"Anon can a borrow a wig?"
>"Anon this is really urgent, I need to let you know that I need help with my makeup for this con that is more than a month away!!!!!"
JFC, how is this person so incompetent? I thought that I'd just need to help with general styling and give suggestions on what's ita and whatnot, not literally have to do EVERYTHING for this idiot.

Moral of the story: Don't be nice to clingy retards.

What's sad is that I know he's going to look like an aspie no matter how well I plan his coord. OH well

[Anonymous No.7506669]

>>7506665

>encouraging brolita ever.

There's your mistake right there.

[Anonymous No.7506693]

>>7504782
Op don't worrie at lest you didn't go to a convention and realize the moment you walk into the restroom that you have a huge ass stain right were everyone can obviously see it right on your new lolita.
and to make it worst trying to remove it while your surrounded buy a bunch of bitchie look girls and when it finally it removed as you walk out from the restroom you realize again that there is know a huge water spot on the dress and the first thing that the people look at is that damn water spot and coming out of the restroom this is not a good look.

[Anonymous No.7506701]

>>7506669
Yeah I know, I dun fucked up.
Maybe I'll secretly post him on here after it happens for all the pain he's made me go through

[Anonymous No.7506737]

>Logs onto FromJapan after a month and a half to place new order
> WTF - being charged 3000 yen in holding fees for waist ties to a skirt I got months ago
>seller forgot to send them for months or lost them and only just found them???
>didn't expect any items as I paid off all auctions I won 2 months ago hence not bothering to log in
>have to pay this dumb fee
>ask FJ what to do about it
>account gets blocked

Well now.

[Anonymous No.7506744]

I'm just feeling shitted off that I had to pay storage fees for something I had no way of expecting would ever arrive y'know?
And then not even replying to my inquiry and blocking me?
Jesus Christ. At least I don't have to pay a fee I guess. They still have my $7 though.

[Anonymous No.7506774]

>>7503574
You're a woman so you still have hope. Now if you were a 26yo virgin male then it'd be very different, in a bad way.

[Anonymous No.7506780]

>>7504632
Different anon. Thanks for this advice.

[Anonymous No.7506848]

>>7506737
Ooooo that's shitty

[Anonymous No.7506878]

>>7506848
It is. Got any services less autistic than FJ?

[Anonymous No.7506898]

>>7506878
Tenso or Japonica.

[Anonymous No.7506916]

>>7504883
Ill offer $100 plus shipping if theres no damage. and if its the mint colorway

[Anonymous No.7506957]

>work in retail
>see the store/con/comm theft thread
>have to stop someone from stealing over $100 worth of makeup last night
>can't stop thinking that all the people who posted about stealing cosmetics are like the scumbags I have to deal with

[Anonymous No.7506962]

>>7504011
Oh, that wasn't me then - I always triple-check the item is not sold out. I would be so disappointed myself if somebody sent a sold-out link

[Anonymous No.7507006]

>>7506957
Yeah, I know how you feel. As an ex retail worker I had to hide that thread. It pissed me off a tad.

[Anonymous No.7507010]

>>7507006
Why not read it to see how you can improve your security?

[Anonymous No.7507014]

I'm male version of those girls who say they love videogames but only watch their boyfriends play, but with cosplay.

>bought several cosplay for my girlfriend
>now I'm learning how to sew so I can make them myself

I don't like cosplaying myself because I'm not white or asian and I don't look like the male anime characters I like. It's much more fun helping my gf with her cosplay because she has the "generic white girl" look, which suits the vast majority of anime girls.

I just wish she could understand that I have more fun this way. She's always telling me to cosplay something.

Now I'm making her a Watashi cosplay.

[Anonymous No.7507106]

>>7504883
What colour, what style, what size? I want that dressssssssssss......

[Anonymous No.7507215]

>>7506898
>Tenso
does it work for mbok?

[Anonymous No.7508160]

>>7507006
I feel you, man. It's as if these people fail to realize that they screw over the people who are working. My boss yells at us whenever stuff goes missing. Every time someone steals I get closer to losing my job. Without my job I can't pay tuition, rent or other expenses.

[Anonymous No.7508189]

>>7506601
Why are metal/goth chicks always the worst? It's always the case in England too.

[Anonymous No.7508254]

>>7508160
It shits me how the thieves are "It's a face less crime! No one gets hurt! The store can wear it and if they don't want us stealing they should lower the prices!"
What these thieves don't realise it's not IF you get caught but WHEN. Most stores have CCTV installed. Once your image is on there stealing something it will be noted by management and in store plain clothes loss prevention officers. When someone recognises you and apprehends you, they go through all previous files and search your house and charge you with everything you have taken, ever. At my old job there were people who were caught stealing on the 4th/5th time that got done for thousands and successfully prosecuted. How's having that on your record?

Sorry for the rant. Stupid selfish wankers always get my goat.

[Anonymous No.7508343]

>>7508189

Pretty much universal to a lot of alt-trends/subcultures at some level unfortunately. There's always a component within them (though often not the majority) that get all caught up in 'authenticity' pissing matches and cliquey behavior.

[Anonymous No.7510036]

>be fatty
>getting nowhere with diet and exercise because of lack of motivation
>come to find out it's actually a medical reason I'm unmotivated
>meds they wanna put me on cause weight loss like mad
>quick Google search brought up various people saying that it stopped after a few months
>tfw I had hope to fit into more brand and cosplay a few more "sexy" characters

Fuck. Here's hoping it'll work for me.

[Anonymous No.7510069]

>>7507215
I don't think so, but I think Japonica does.

[Anonymous No.7513339]

>new to lolita
>want to put together a decent coord so I don't show up the fabulously dressed members of my comm
>Looking for the perfect socks to pull my coord together
>Found my dream socks(I never thought I would ever ever say that) for my coord on a sales page
>Instantly comment asking about price etc.
>Sorry anon I only ship to US
>wat.jpg
>Message them asking would they be willing to make an exception have the money ready to go etc.
>Sorry anon I don't post overseas, it's too much effort and its expensive
>Last I checked buyer paid the shipping fee and all that has to be done for posting is fill out a CN22 form
>End up getting replicas somewhere else
>mfw having to get replicas when I vowed never to purchase replicas

[Anonymous No.7513394]

>>7513339

From what I understand, there are a lot of chances for things to go wrong when you ship to certain areas overseas and sellers don't want to get negative feedback if something were to happen to the package. I've shipped out a few things to England and the Netherlands and as far as I know they arrived promptly and in one piece but others may give more fucks than me. I slapped that shit in a box, filled out the paperwork at the post office and sent it on its merry way. If I'll buy from places in Europe and the like then why should I be scared of selling to them?

[Anonymous No.7513498]

>>7513394
I understand the risks as I ship overseas myself, however if it was a high risk country I'd insist on a service that would cover my ass paypal wise. I'm based in Ireland and I can count on one hand the packages that have gone missing from overseas. I even asked for tracked shipping but nope. I wish there were more US sellers like you though anon as a lot of the US only sellers have no problems buying from EU sellers.

It also sucks because the $ to € exchange rate atm is awesome!

[Anonymous No.7513614]

>tfw no lolita gf
it always looks so nice

[Anonymous No.7513621]

Ha

[Anonymous No.7514122]

>tfw: have something so juicy cgl would die laughing. But cannot due to the situation I have put myself into. I must remain polite and professional.
>I am in over my head. This is going to either be hilarious, or a terrible trainwreck. I can't decide if I should get the popcorn cause dis gonna b guuud or just cry in a corner.

[Anonymous No.7514271]

I am a little frustrated. I am currently moving to a new location and tried to contact the mods of the lolita community on fb. I messaged both of the mods but haven't received a reply in 2-3 weeks. I thought my messages were polite and straightforward. I just want to go to my first tea party seagulls...

[Anonymous No.7514746]

>>7514122
whatever the outcome, once it crashes, be sure to take pictures. and tell us the story.

[Anonymous No.7514751]

>Auction on Mbok ending soon
>Sent deposit to Japonica over 24 hours ago
>Still haven't bid yet
>Their office closes in 1 hour

Hurry uppp

[Anonymous No.7515820]

>>7514746
I can't really elaborate more as nothing has been made 100% official yet, but I would much rather be Vic Mignogna's handler anyday than dealing with what I'm dealing with right now. All because I was trying to point my comm away from something potentially creepy and to something more public and enjoyable. /cgl/ would literally have a field day with the deets I've got. Maybe if someone catches me in person at Otakon I will dish it all out at the swap meet or something.

[Anonymous No.7515850]

>>7515820
Hang in there. I'll be with you along for the ride.

[Anonymous No.7515853]

>>7503422
>implying that's not the natural role of females

[Anonymous No.7515882]

>tfw you always get hype at conventions
>tfw you always compliment people on their cosplays
>tfw they always act like you are disgusting and hitting on them

I never hated women so much until I started going to cons

They think just because you want to take a picture and ask about their costume, you want to fuck them
Unwarranted self importance, every one of them

[Anonymous No.7515898]

>>7515882
>Imblying you don't want to fuck them.
All men want to fuck everything that moves, I learned this at cons. Unlimited sex drive, every one of them.

[Anonymous No.7515904]

>>7515898
I'm just a goofy dude
I enjoy being around people, and being around cosplayers/lolitas is really interesting

>tfw no qt lolita gf

[Anonymous No.7515914]

>>7515904
>>tfw no qt lolita gf
SEE I knew it you were trying to fuck me!

[Anonymous No.7515956]

>>7515882
We're not all like that, geez. Unless you actually are acting like a fuckwit.

[Anonymous No.7516078]

>>7515956
my mistake

the vast majority, I have met a few cosplayers that were excited about it and loved to talk about it, but it seem so many feel like they are above the chaff of the general con populace

>>7515914
>fuck
>not love tenderly

[Anonymous No.7516239]

>>7515898
That is so far from the truth that I can't believe that you actually believe that.

[Anonymous No.7516649]

>>7503422
get a volunteer position somewhere; most places don't care if you have 0 experience because it's free labor and then you can make connections there or at least use them as a professional reference. The animal shelters where I live take volunteers to just clean up and play with the animals, easy peasy. From there you can branch out or at least pretend that you're not a jobless loser of your friend group because you're busy volunteering.

[Anonymous No.7516662]

>>7514271
they probably banned you for some reason and didn't tell you
>tfw moved to small town
>instantly get banned from comm for some reason
>ask someone in the comm whats up, no one told me anything
apparently one of the mods banned me because I won her dream dress on the comm sales

other co-mod apologized for it, says they'd unban me soon and hope I'd forgive them

>months later
>never unbanned

sucks that mods are corrupted like this.
I wonder how many other people got banned for stupid reasons like this.

[Anonymous No.7516683]

>>7516662
>women
>senseless drama and catfighting

Oh yes, I'm sure its just out of the ordinary

[Anonymous No.7516694]

Is the Brisbane lolita comm really as bad as /cgl/ says it is?

I was just introduced, by a mutual friend, to a local loli. I'm pretty desperate for some ladyfriends right now, so I guess this is good because it gives us something in common right off the bat - But, in all honesty, they immediately strike me as a bunch of serious brandwhores.
>tfw I dress significantly better than any of them but can only afford Taobao.

;~; I just want frilly friends.

[Anonymous No.7516696]

>>7516694
There is barely anyone in Brisbane that actually wears brand anon... The drama is terrible at the moment though, lots of selfposting here as well, probably because there is nothing better to do and there's a lot of noobs.

[Anonymous No.7516705]

>>7516662
banned? I literally haven't ever met them. All I did was show an interest in lolita. This is so depressing.

[Anonymous No.7516706]

>>7516696
Hm. I was just skimming this girls' photos when I realized that I saw one of her coords posted here like a week ago. She has that huge AP bunny bonnet and perfect thick eyebrows.

So they're mostly replicas, then? I don't care how anybody else is dressed, I just want to find people who will return that sentiment.
>/cgl/ has left me with an awful impression, heh.

[Anonymous No.7516715]

>>7516706
>mfw she might actually see this.
H-hey! I see you like good music. W-want to come see Gloryhammer and Lagerstein next week? I'm friends with both so it'll be free.

>;~;

[Anonymous No.7516718]

>>7516705
yeah some people will ban/not accept you for
>not having any pictures of you in jfashion available
>being a dude (lots of creepy fetisists that think sissy=brolita)
>rubbing someone the wrong way, ever (bullshit reasons)
>if they think you might be sketchy or unhealthy for their comm in any way (also bullshit reasons if they havent met/talked to you)

[Anonymous No.7516731]

>>7516718
I just made a fb for the reason of looking at up this comm's page. Well, guess it wasn't worth it. Thanks for explaining it to me anon...

[Anonymous No.7516735]

>>7516731
They could just be really lazy with adding people too. Are your messages marked as seen? How big is the group?

[Anonymous No.7516737]

>>7516731
did they really ban you, and you were able to look them up?

I'm in the same boat. kinda sucks. maybe we can be friends instead!

[Anonymous No.7516758]

>>7516731
As a group admin myself, be aware that your request was ignored likely because your account was new. I have to deal with newly made Chinese spam bots a lot, and so might your group.

Change your profile pic and cover photo to jfash related, publicly post some stuff about you finally making a fb, and add some friends. Then message them and try to join again.

[Anonymous No.7516769]

>>7516758
Thank you for the advice anon, I did post a profile picture as j-fashion related but I didn't want to make my profile "real" because I dislike fb. I have never had a fb before and I've never really wanted one. If I do decide to do that I will take your advice.
>>7516737
I was still able to look at the groups page, I have no idea if that means I was banned or not. Where are you from anon? I'd love to talk lolita with someone.
>>7516735
They were not marked as seen but I had guessed I was being denied since it was nearly 3 weeks ago since I sent the messages. I don't think the group is that big, It looked small.

[Anonymous No.7516772]

>>7516769
Did you try adding the mods?
Maybe try a post on egl, someone from the comm might notice it.

[Anonymous No.7516784]

>>7516772
other anon that was in the same situation, I tried that. I just got side eyed and banned from a comm 2 hours away as well.
since I was asking about being banned, people were like "oh my goodness, she must be bad news"

I haven't even been to a meetup before..

[Anonymous No.7516793]

>>7516784
And this was because you bought a dress a mod wanted? How pathetic. I would call them out on it somewhere. What dress was it anyway?

[Anonymous No.7516805]

Well

I've become an escort.

[Anonymous No.7516824]

>>7516784
I hope someone excepts both of us soon. Goodluck to you anon
>>7516772
I did not. I actually got super nervous this morning and just deleted the fb account.

[Anonymous No.7516826]

>>7516824
accepts*

[Anonymous No.7516838]

This is kind of my fault for not being nearly as assertive. Here goes:
>made peace with a few people from ex circle of friends
>cut ties because they were always taking advantage of me or my stuff
>made me feel used
>never did anything for me in return
>well whatever, they won't change but I'm lonely and I can always say no
>apologize and let a couple back in

>be a few weeks ago
>friend contacts me asking if she can borrow one of my lolita dresses for a local con
>tumblr tier Homestucker ftm
>literally will get angry if you use female pronouns when addressing her even though she still looks female
>>"Pretty please anon? I have nothing to wear for this con and I want to loli."
>>"I guess you can borrow one of mine if you come over sometime."

>be that sometime
>she's eyeing my DDC
>>"Friendanon I'm sorry, but that's my prized possession and that is something I wouldn't let my own mother borrow."
>>"I understand anon."
>>"I do have this replica that I don't really wear, and it has only a couple damages."
>>"It's perfect anon, thank you. I will return it after the con!"

>2 weeks later and no skirt to be found
>message her politely asking what time I can be around my apartment for when she drops off the skirt
>conversation ends ambiguously because we can't really square a time due to schedules
>still no reason why she can't drop it off inside our bottom stoop, which is always unlocked and never invaded
>almost 4 weeks have passed, no skirt
>mfw
It's disappointing to me that some people have such a lack of respect for other peoples' stuff that they don't find it a compelling priority to return things ASAP regardless of the owner 'reminding' or 'asking' them for their items. I shouldn't have to do that, it should just be common courtesy.
Yeah I could minimize it and say 'well at least it was only a damaged replica' but it was still $90. I know a lot of people who would be pissed at me if I borrowed a $90 skirt and didn't return it promptly.

[Anonymous No.7516843]

>>7516793
no specifics were given to me. I buy a lot of dresses.
I wish I knew so I could sneak into a meet wearing it in the most Ita coord possible.
>>7516824
any idea as to why they would ban you?

[Anonymous No.7516852]

>>7516838
What replica skirt is worth $90...?

[Anonymous No.7516855]

>>7516843
Literally no idea.

[Anonymous No.7516856]

>>7516838
Oh god, you're better off getting new friends.

Or at the very least ask for a collateral trade like I do with my friends.

[Anonymous No.7516884]

>>7516852
I was plus size at the time so Oo Jia's comes to about $90 with the extra charge plus the stupid shipping.
>>7516856
Yeah, I'm just too numb to make noise about it I guess.

[Anonymous No.7516907]

>Make lighthearted joke to best friend about his dog in conversation
>he says his dog was put down
>when his dad moved out
>last year
>I never knew, he didn't say anything about either of those things
>At least, I think he didn't
>Feel like asshole and failure as a friend
>what do I even do all day
>watch anime and buy dumb amounts of dresses instead of spending time with people
>I'm doing it RIGHT NOW FUCK'S SAKE
>christ I'm a lousy person

[Anonymous No.7517045]

>>7516805
tell us your feels about that, anon

[Anonymous No.7517084]

>Be me in cicle of friends
>They always talk about Doctor Who, Buffy, Tolkien
>Never EVER talk about anything else
>One day get into a fight with them, as they were violent SJWs
>They start chastising me about being a rape apologist, eventually my other friend who has ACTUALLY BEEN RAPED joins in on the convo, defending me and saying they're loonies
>Later they talk shit behind my back and I find out
>"Yeah well it's your fault you are so immature!"
>Nobody to go to cons with anymore

[Anonymous No.7517093]

>>7516907
Use website blocking soft ware to block you from anime or 4chan for three hours of your evening, every evening (Mine can be made so that you're only allowed on whitelisted sites).

Use those hours to not be lousy.

[Anonymous No.7517096]

>>7517084
> Tolkien
do they at least go by the books?

[Anonymous No.7517108]

>>7517096
Yes, even the Silmarillion. I mean I know I'm gonna get shit for not reading Tolkien and going against the hivemind etc, but fantasy never really interested me and I used to always have to listen to them talking despite there being people who haven't read the books or seen the movies. It's just rude. Imagine if you had two friends who would invite you to hang out and then talk amongst themselves about Naruto or whatever, and you just sit there.

[Anonymous No.7517115]

>>7517108
I wish my comm talked about the silmarillion. I read it six times ;_;

[Anonymous No.7517130]

I still like star clips.
Do they have to die?

[Anonymous No.7517135]

>>7517130
I like them too, anon. But I've never bought them because I'm always trying to convince myself they're as awful as cgl makes them out to be, but I just don't see it. They'd go great with my Dream Sky. Maybe I'll just get over it an buy some already.

[Anonymous No.7517138]

>>7517130
Star clips aren't bad in coords that match i.e prints/coords with star/moon/ sky motifs in them. But people need to stop randomly using them just because they need gold/silver in their coords, since they are much better/original ways of doing that.

[Anonymous No.7517209]

>>7517130
No way anon I'm going to get them in every single color

[Anonymous No.7517224]

>>7517138
I used them to match my AP headbows that have star charms on them...

[Anonymous No.7517276]

>tfw waiting for packages

[Anonymous No.7517313]

>>7516838
God I've had lots of people take or break my shit whether it be intentional on their parts or not.

>Friend of flatmate comes over, needs jacket and jeans because it's cold outside and they're going out.
>Ask if they can borrow some of my clothes and I let them.
>A while passes and I ask about the clothes being returned. Promises to return them next time she is over... doesn't happen. She keeps conveniently forgetting.
>Girl comes round our place some other time while I'm out and flatmate allows her to borrow more of my clothes. What the fuck.
>Never see girl again. See facebook photos of her wearing my clothes.

Other story:
>Same flatmate as mentioned above.
>Borrows my nintendo DS
>I move out at end of lease
>Keep reminding him and other flatmate to return my DS. I never see it again.

Another friend:
>Borrows my iphone to check her messages
>Her sim card gets stuck inside because sim ejector is fucked.
>Let her use it until we can get figure out how to get the sim card out.
>She has it for weeks because I'm too timid to ask for it back.
>In that time she breaks the screen and probably drops it zillions of times. She doesn't tell me and replaces screen herself with a kit.
>Phone eventually returned and I pay for the fucking sim tray to be repaired.
>She offers nothing.
>Phone is fucked and slow as shit. Suffice to say that phone is long gone.
>Same friend has also "borrowed" clothes from me to never be returned.

Another flatmate:
>Allow him to borrow my dSLR for university
>One day he comes to me and tells me my prime lens is broken.
>Idiot must've been manually adjusting the lens when it was on an auto setting.
>Camera bag is also broken.
>Flatmate acts like it was all working fine when he last used it, even though he'd been the only person using it, and the last time I had used it my lens was fine.
>He doesn't offer to replace it.

I guess the moral of the story is to never lend anyone your shit.

[Anonymous No.7517364]

>>7517313

I am sorry Anon, but your friends sound shitty. Time to get new friends maybe?
Also, put your big girl pants on sometimes and just stop being nice. Don't ask for things, DEMAND them. Be harsh. Be brutally honest. Annoy people until they can no longer ignore you etc. Confront them. Do not ask for things, just take your stuff and leave those jerks behind.

>I guess the moral of the story is to never lend anyone your shit.

Yes, especially people you are not close with. Believe me, friends of a friend or friends of a room mate are most likely to never return your stuff.

[Anonymous No.7517384]

>>7502583

>if you keeping wearing it, color runs, etc
Most Lolitas take impeccable care of their clothing because it's so expensive and means so much to them, and those who wear it all the time arent going to wear their best pieces for daily life.

>You need a set of shoes and bags for every dress
If you do that you're a complete moron, just saying. Most Lolitas are smart enough to have these basics match the majority of their wardrobe or only need 2-3 of either to match everything. A wardrobe like the one you're talking about either doesn't exist or isn't very imaginative.

> I can't imagine living such a sad life of thousands of dollars on dresses
People spend thousands of dollars on lots of hobbies, at least we get to wear ours every day if we want.

>can't justify wearing past a certain age
Implying Lolita isn't worth anything on the second-hand market if someone mentally grows out of it? Not even going to touch the subject of being physically "too old"

>it just can't be worth it
Not to you, I suppose. You probably have other priorities and that's fine. I can't imagine spending thousands of dollars on cosplay or bjds either but I understand what it's like to have a hobby.

[Anonymous No.7517412]

One of my best friends and my boyfriend got into a facebook fight last night about the dumbest fucking political shit and now hate eachother.
I really liked that both of them were friends, and now thats gone because neither of them want to have any sort of legitimate debate and are just fucking ragging on eachother and its been making me sad all day.
My friend sent me a text that said that she never wants to hang out with us at cons if I bring him with me and I cried for about an hour.
I'm just really sad and want them to stop fighting and make up because I love them both so much.

[Anonymous No.7517417]

>>7517412
Tell them to work that shit out like adults. Unless one of them was being an offensive piece of shit, they need to learn to deal with people with opposing viewpoints.

[Anonymous No.7517421]

>>7517412
You should tell them that you live them both and it's unfair that you have to choose. They both need to grow up and learn how to have a healthy debate.

[Anonymous No.7517541]

>>7516884

Anon you've got some seriously shitty friends. You deserve better than that.

[Anonymous No.7517661]

>>7517412
Who the fuck publicly argues on facebook? Who publicly argues POLITICS on facebook? I can't believe neither of them took a moment to think, "Maybe I should stop arguing because this could damage my relationship with Anon, someone who is closer to me than nearly anyone I know. Hmmm, maybe she is more important than this argumen-NOPE WHO CARES! SOMEONE IS WRONG ON THE INTERNET!!!"
That's really inconsiderate of them. I would never be so harsh with my SO's best friend nor my best friend's SO. Your boyfriend and your friend really need to learn to control their anger. I hope they've never turned that anger on you.

[Anonymous No.7517991]

>>7516715
Which show- Sands Tavern or The tempo?

[Anonymous No.7518013]

>>7517991
Tempo's been shut down, it's been moved to The New Globe. But yeah, Brisbane.

Maybe Sands if I go up with them after the GC show.

[Anonymous No.7518303]

>>7518013
If you happen to go to Sands, emails in the field and if you don't go - feel free to email anyway

[Anonymous No.7518327]

>>7518303
Oh man, this is so weird.

[Anonymous No.7518336]

>>7516696
Since when? A majority of the girls wear brand actually and what drama?

[Anonymous No.7518339]

>>7518327
>>7518303
I agree especially since I know that anon who commented above.

Also original anon who wanted to go see Gloryhammer and Lagerstein, why don't you make a post on the comm page? Many of the girls like this kind of music.

[Anonymous No.7518341]

>>7518339
The frillbutts one? Isn't it closed?

I have absolutely no clue about online or offline comms at this point.

[Anonymous No.7518347]

>>7518341
A mod just has to accept you it should be all good aslong as you aren't a creeper.

[Anonymous No.7518353]

>>7518347
Oh. Right. That was easy.

>I feel terrible for derailing the thread now.

[Anonymous No.7518359]

>>7518353
It's alright anon no one was posting their feels anyway. I hope you make some friends in the comm.

[Anonymous No.7518361]

>>7518339
Hey friend!
I won't be adding it to the comm page because it's on the sunshine coast and many bris lolitas don't have cars and there's not enough public transport for people to get home safely after the bands closes (not to mention short notice of the event) .
There's a Brisbane show if people want to go and see the band, new location details are on the Gloryhammer FB page.

[Anonymous No.7518364]

>>7518327

[Anonymous No.7518365]

>On the tall side and average weight
>Coording improving
> At that stage when I realise
>Would be a much better lolita if I was prettier.
>Would be a much better lolita if I lost weight.
> Damn.

[Anonymous No.7518379]

>first ever meet tomorrow
>know no one there
>half the biscuits I made stuff up. I know have only 10 to take.
>still sewing part of my coord.
I feel so stressed out.

[Anonymous No.7518380]

>>7518365
I'm sure you look lovely, anon!

I recently came to terms with the fact that almost every normal-wasited JSK will sit a few inches above my waist and make me look dumpy.
>Skirts it is.

[Anonymous No.7518382]

>>7518380
Thank you kind anon.
That's sad to hear are you quite a tall anon too?

I have begun to embrace skirts also although long jsks and AATP jsks are good for me.

[Anonymous No.7518384]

>>7518382
I don't think so - 5'6". It's just the unfortunate combination of a low waist and high waist-bust ratio. Bleh!

Longer jsks look so elegant~

[Anonymous No.7518388]

>>7518384
5'6 is still taller than the average lolita. I'm 5'8 so I can understand to a degree. That's a shame anon.

I agree, although IW long jsks on me just reach over my knees sadly.

[Anonymous No.7518430]

I'm an aspie and I have a really rough time making friends with other females. It's really tough to pick up on the normal social queues of female friendships, I guess men tend to be more straight forward or something. All I want is just to find a female aspie friend who shares my love of lolita and understands my weird "quirks" sometimes, hypersensitivity, and sensory issues and stuff. Most lolitas I meet are really really nice, but I just never make it to the friendship level because I am just completely confused on how to even begin to get there. I've only ever had a very small amount of female friends growing up and they were when I was very young.

[Anonymous No.7518433]

>>7518430
Oh anon it's sad to hear that you've had trouble making female friends, my brother has aspergers and I have bap (I'm lucky as I don't have social issues, just other traits but my brother really struggles with it). Are you Australian anon? I will be your friend. I truly do hope that you will find someone to obsess over lolita with and understands you. I wish you all the best anon. With it being easier to make friends with males they are less social creatures and are more direct with what they say and emotions in general. Emotional intelligence is also lower in males (generally) hence the more directness at times.

[Anonymous No.7518440]

>>7517045
Having money to buy things is great. Fucking ugly old men is not.

[Anonymous No.7518443]

>>7518433
Ah sadly I am not Australian, I'm American. Thanks for the kind wishes though! I will say I have noticed that I definitely have more emotional intelligence than most male aspies I've met and maybe even some males in general, but definitely not on the same level as most females. It's definitely a lot harder because I notice in female friendships if you don't talk as often it's not really a "friendship", I guess, whereas I guess with males this doesn't happen as much. I tend to become really absorbed in other hobbies outside of lolita and forget a lot about friends and stuff so it's hard to keep up with talking to a friend every day and stuff. I'm also never really sure when exactly you are friends, so I either hold back too much or get way too excited about making a female friend and probably get a little weird, heh.

Thank you very much though!

[Anonymous No.7518524]

>>7518430
Maybe look for social groups?
I joined a local American Sewing Guild and it's nice to meet with people that like the same thing. I would call the ladies I meet acquaintances, but it's easier way to hone my social interactions.

[Anonymous No.7518552]

Swore off camming and got another job at home.
Promised myself and my parents I wouldn't cam and I would respect myself.
Money is getting tight.
I used to make 600 or so a week camming for like 4 hours every other day.

I want to cam, but I don't want to let myself down. The people there are gross and it makes me loathe humanity the more I cam.
But, fuuuuuuuuck, I need the money.
My parents have generously helped me out and gave money numerous times.
I don't want to ask for more.

Worry worry worry.

[Anonymous No.7518555]

>>7518552
I live on the poverty line, anon. I make $245 a fortnight. I was homeless for a short period before being given an emergency housing apartment to rent.

You can always make do. Nothing is worth your self-respect.

[Anonymous No.7518562]

>>7517313
Stop being such a doormat

[Anonymous No.7518733]

>>7518555
I know, but I have me a little one to take care of, besides myself, otherwise I'd be like "Fuck it!" and go live in a van down by the river.

That's why it's so difficult.
Ethics? Or buy my kid some clothes because he's growing out of his so quickly?

That's my feels.

[Anonymous No.7518738]

>>7518733
That seems like all the more reason not to do it, honestly.

Are you doing any sort of actual work? Do you have any abilities or hobbies that you can turn into profit, even if small? Are you on any sort of government funding?

[Anonymous No.7518823]

>>7518733
>>7518552
now imagine you were a guy and didnt have the option to whore yourself out on the internet

check your female privilege

[Anonymous No.7518877]

>>7518823
Oh yes.... I imagined it.
How could I have been so foolish? Thanks for putting it all in perspective.
Euphoric.

[Anonymous No.7519166]

>>7517412
I've learned that best friends hate boyfriends.
My friend has a stupid reason for hating my boyfriend.
>what'd he do to make you unfriend him?
>he posts statuses from tumblr and doesn't add quotations
everything comes from tumblr to her.
Whenever I bring up my boyfriend doing something funny as a joke she turns it shit.
She has snarky comments about everything he does wrong.
The best thing I can do is just not talk about my boyfriend with her and just keep them separate. (kinda hard tho because I live with him)

[Anonymous No.7519186]

>>7519166
Sage for off topic, but my friends are the same with my boyfriend in a way. They constantly call him ugly or that he looks like a serial killer (back when he had long hair). I don't understand why! My boyfriend always has super pretty girls falling for him, even in the past, and recently a model has shown him interest. I don't get why they don't see that he's attractive too.

[Anonymous No.7519365]

I swear to God, every time I plan to wear one of my dresses, the weather forecast is shit. For the week prior it looks like the weather will be okay, and then the day before, it changes to 'heavy rain'.
I'm probably just being silly, but I don't want to risk my print running/bleeding.

[Anonymous No.7519382]

>>7519186
Girls often tell themselves these things so they don't feel bad or jealous for not having an attractive boyfriend, too.

[Anonymous No.7519384]

>>7519166
>>7519186
What the fuck is wrong with your friends? Do they have any sort of decency, filter, or respect for you?

[Anonymous No.7519448]

So I realized I get really anxious around large groups/crowds. I've always kept to myself due to the fact it was way to hard to get into a large group, and talk about something everyone likes. Plus I'm really paranoid of how people perceive me, so I choose to be a wall flower. Now, this kinda sucks since I have a hobby that includes being around a large crowd.
I like to cosplay. Love actually. I enjoy it a lot. I'm rather new at it even though I've been interested in it for many years. I've got a bunch of costumes that have been sitting around, never finished.

Recently, my city had it's big anime convention. I couldn't make it because I didn't have the money to go, or to finish my costume. So I missed it. The con is really huge.. Now there are two more cons going on this year that my city has, but both are smaller. Smaller is good for me. But I started thinking about what it would be like to go there, wearing my costume, the people I'll meet, the photographers asking for photos, ect. I started to get a terrible stomach ache. I'm really.. really freaked out by people, and wearing a costume makes my feelings 10x worse..

tl:dr. I love cosplay. I'm get extremely anxious around large crowds. This is difficult for someone who loves cosplay. My imagination is over-reacting the whole situation that hasn't happened yet.

[Anonymous No.7519449]

>>7519384
We have all known each other since kindergarten. We don't really use a filter with one another. Like, they will brutally tease each other, and I'm an easy target since I'm the "nerdiest" one out of the bunch. Sometimes I enjoy how honest we can be with each other, but I wish they could see what I see.

Speaking of lolita feels, my coworkers found out about my addiction, and now they won't stop asking me when I'm getting a new dress in. I kind of enjoy educating them about lolita when it comes up. It's a nice change.

[Anonymous No.7519537]

>>7519448
Oh, poor anon!
Do you have someone to go with who is willing to stick with you and help you out throughout the day if you choose to attend a con? It's much more helpful than if you were to go alone.

[Anonymous No.7519597]

>went out in public in lolita for the first time
>good handful of compliments to my face and only one snarky lady
>she was mid - forties in sweatpants,crocs,and a nasty tank top with no bra so who cares
>everything went better than expected

[Anonymous No.7519618]

Not checking the comm sales for a few hours and missing Fragrant rose memories going up for sale...again
Fucking depressed.

[Anonymous No.7519630]

>>7519618

This was how I used to feel about Fantastic Dolly (even got flake for it) but I finally scored. Got the JSK from one girl and not even a week later the headbow popped up and I got that too. Felt good, man. Now I'm on the hunt for a red Fantastic Dolly set. Lets see how long this one takes.

[Anonymous No.7519684]

>>7518555
>$245 a fortnight

How? You are either working like 1 day a week or getting paid 37c an hour

[Anonymous No.7519691]

>>7519449
Ugh, I despise how people say mean things but then say, "Just teasing!" I've lost a lot of friends who disagree with me on that. I'm sorry that my feelings don't turn off and I that I don't think they're being cute when I quickly eat a burger and they say, "Aww, is the widdle piggly hungwry? Better hang on to your food, girls, she'll just eat it all up!!"
Now I feel like a greedy, ill-mannered hambeast. Excuse me as I go order a salad, take an hour to eat half of it and throw out the rest.

I don't get how people think this is okay. It means that when she saw me eating she equated me with a ravenous pig. How is that not insulting? I don't want to look like a greedy pig...

[Anonymous No.7519728]

>>7518430
Oh God, I feel you on that. Not aspie but I have pretty bad social anxiety. Most of my friends are guys that my boyfriend and I play video games with. I have one female friend in my life currently and she pretty much has the same problems too. I'm trying to join my lolita comm but I already feel like I skeeved them out or something, sigh. You can send me an email if you want to talk about things, I'd love to hear from you.

[Anonymous No.7519750]

>>7519691
People who think they are funny by making cruel comments to others are shit heads. It's like they have to put down others around them to deflect from how horrible they are. It's total bullshit and you do not have to take it on board. (Every time it happens, just say to yourself 'is what she said a valid representation of what is actually happening?' Chances are it won't be, so don't bother to pay attention to it. Fuck them.)
'

[Anonymous No.7519764]

>>7519630
Finding the bow to match my black FD is becoming a huge hassle.

>got the jsk overseas for an excellent deal
>$100 less than what I'd pay a western lolita for it
>no headbow though
>to this day still can't find it or a matchable headpiece to go with it
>mfw
It's a bitch. So in my closet it rests..

[Anonymous No.7519766]

>>7519684
... I make that much working 30 hours a week, anon.

[Anonymous No.7519769]

>>7519684
Minimum wage sure is a fucking bitch, isn't it?

[Anonymous No.7519812]

>>7518430
>>7518433
Anons, I feel for you.

To go on a slightly different tangent, I have a severely autistic sister and had wondered if I were on the autism spectrum as well. My family has a weird dynamic going on. I hadn't heard of BAP before so was just looking it up.

I've been tossing up whether I should ask a doctor about it but my mother seems to keep dissuading me from looking too deeply into it, saying I just have some social anxiety, but I don't know. I've always had a hard time connecting with others, making friends, socialising, sympathising, people tell me I'm aloof and/or weird, that I tend to take things literally (which can make me seem ditzy).

Maybe I am overanalysing things because when I've asked some of my friends if they feel the same way about things, they do - so maybe this is all just a common human experience. I don't know if it's worth finding out because I don't think it will change anything.

[Anonymous No.7519828]

>>7519812
If your parents have money (i.e. you're insured) I don't see the harm in checking it out with a shrink. Even if it's just social anxiety, why not try to conquer it a bit?

[Anonymous No.7519877]

>>7519812
It's good to be able to say you've never been diagnosed with a mental illness. Especially in the legal and professional sense. If it's not really hurting your quality of life or particularly pressing, and you think you might be able to solve it on your own, don't go.

[Anonymous No.7519892]

>>7519877
I don't know where you live, but in most countries a person is not required to disclose their medical history to a future employer, and autism and mild social anxiety don't have legal ramifications, that's insane. In most Western countries as may as a third of all adults have a diagnosed mental illness, it's not exactly AIDS.

[Anonymous No.7519901]

>>7519892
In the United States it's possible to be barred from owning a firearm or performing government jobs if you have been diagnosed with certain mental illnesses. In the forms I signed just last week in order to be hired for a job it asked if I have been diagnosed with any mental illness or if I am currently attending therapy.

I'm from /k/ and we're especially paranoid about the first thing in the United States. I supposed /cgl/ wouldn't necessarily mind.

[Anonymous No.7519947]

>>7519828
>>7519877
>>7519892
>>7519901
I'm not from the US and live in a country with free public healthcare so no need for insurance or going to my parents (I live in a different country to my family at the moment anyway). I wouldn't have to disclose that info with an employer either.

I didn't think Asperger's/autism spectrum was a mental illness, but more an intellectual disability?

I guess what I want to know is if those of you who have been clinically diagnosed have found it a helpful or beneficial experience? Did it change anything or not?

[Anonymous No.7519956]

>>7519947
Asperger's is actually being removed from the DSM-V, so you probably won't be diagnosed with that. But yes, autism is an learning disability, not a mental illness.

I've found talk therapy to be a very helpful experience, as well as CBT (which can be helpful for social anxiety). The diagnosis itself? For me it was kind of comforting. It felt easier to explain what was going on with me, and helped me see what to do moving forward. But I wouldn't say it inherently helped me in any way. (This was for ADHD and major depressive disorder, so similar on both fronts.)

[Anonymous No.7520086]

>tfw 19 year old male viewing this thread
I thought my night couldn't get any more depressing. Don't kill yourselves pls.

[Anonymous No.7520119]

>>7520086
Yeah, I get those painful empathy nights sometimes too. Hah, I'm kind of getting empathy pangs from your empathy. It's sweet that you care so much about us melancholy ma'ams.
This is a fairly low key feels thread. I hope you don't venture into some of the sadder boards out there. Comparatively, /cgl/ is sunshine and rainbows. Head on over to /c/ or something. I hope your night improves.

[Anonymous No.7520166]

>>7519186
I have/had a lolita friend like this too. He was always really nice and gave her lifts and stuff but she says she doesn't like him because she thinks I can do better. But heaps of girls liked him in the past and a few still did/have while we've been together.

[Anonymous No.7520169]

>>7502689
Omg are you me, Anon? It's been a year here. I was to marry that man, we lived together. He supported my lolita hobby, even bought me a lolita bag. We had a fight, we made up. And then out of sudden he left me, called me on phone to tell me he moved out. Fuck, it hurt me so much. He wasn't worth it, you know? I know I won't cheer you up. Only time can fix things. If he broke up with you because of stress, remember that future holds even more stressful situations, so if he broke up with you for no reason, when there's a reason he wouldn't have stayed anyway. Deep truths.
Captcha: other heimpast

[Anonymous No.7520175]

>>7502699
Yup. This exactly. I buy most of my clothes from H&M anyway, the quality is just a little bit lower than high fash brands anyway. Unless I like something, say Gucci or Chanel, I don't have problems wig wee paring that + H&M. But I never spent less than $100 on shoes. Actually price reflects shoes quality. Last pair of shoes costed me $350 but he'll, these are the most comfortable shoes ever.

[Anonymous No.7520181]

>>7520169
>Boyfriend is touring with friends right now.
>Briefly met up with a girl he knows. (While with everybody else.)
>Later said to her "In a different time, we would have had drinks and banged."

I don't know if this means that if he weren't together with me they'd have fucked, or if he weren't busy working and with the other guys they'd have fucked.

Eh.

[Anonymous No.7520182]

>>7503597
Or get a cat. I have two cats and I haven't seen a spider or a fly in ages. Spiders can be fast, but my cats are faster.

[Anonymous No.7520188]

>put coord together
>is well put together and colours balanced well
>30 notes
>friends post basic coords
>500 notes

I think I might stop posting outfit posts. I just feel like shit. It's probably because I have a derpy, ugly face. I'll either stop posting, post floordinates, or just start blanking out my face.

And to think, I was just starting to feel better about this ugly mug.

[Anonymous No.7520318]

After every meet, I worry that I've mad an ass of myself, and not in the quirky, fun way, but the annoying, everyone's going to hate me way.

[Anonymous No.7520329]

>>7519947
I got diagnosed with assburgers at 17 and while at first it gave me a bit of a relief as in 'I"m not crazy' not really much has changed...

Probably because I don't find myself that autistic..? If anything I feel like it's an overreaction, but oh well I got the label now anyway.

The thing is, I feel like when you get diagnosed and people know about the diagnose, everything or at least a lot will suddenly be attributed to it.

Talk a lot? it's the autism
Didn't get that one joke out of 10? so autistic
and other stuff like that

[Anonymous No.7520340]

>>7520188
I think you should try to not put so much emphasis on how many notes you do or don't have. Also, please don't give up!

Posting your outfits, or at least recording them, is a great way to reflect and grow within lolita. When I look back on my past outfits, I can see how far I've come and it makes me feel really proud. I can also look at where I'm at now and see where I need to improve.

As for tumblr notes, try to forget it as much as you can. I know it's hard because it can give you quite the rush, but the way you get tumblr notes is generally attributed to pure chance (eg, your post being re blogged by someone efamous) and to playing the system.

Generally, the later involves a few things such as; the time of day you post, the tags you use, the post content, and current trends. All of this is why you shouldn't take tumblr notes too personally.

As for your insecurities about your face, I know how you feel. I have a case of man face and when I first started posting outfits I insisted on blocking it out. I then started to study my lolita idols more and more in order to learn off of them, but I found that so much of their look was just magic tricks with angles and makeup.

What I suggest you do is play around with these things to try and find what works for you. Also, focus a bit more on the features of your body that you love, as opposed to the ones you don't like. I personally found that experimenting with these things really changed the way I looked.

You also have to understand that this fashion can really fuck with your mind. I've found that since I started wearing lolita, I've become rather critical of my weight and my size, even though I'm rather small by Western standards.

tl;dr
>take a step back and not take notes too personally
>realize that most of the fashion is an illusion
>focus on what you love

[Anonymous No.7520475]

>>7520188
I used to be in the same boat as you. I would only get 10-20 notes and most of them were pity likes from friends. Getting lots of notes requires lots of time and followers. It's taken me about two years to understand how to work tumblr in the best way. I still am not super popular because I don't have outfits with the latest prints and I'm not very good at hair and makeup. It's important to post often and eventually something will stick! Follow what >>7520340 says, it's very good advice.

[Anonymous No.7520484]

>>7520340
>>7520475
Thank you both. I guess I'm in a bit of a bad place right now so I'm being extremely critical of myself, which doesn't help.

[Anonymous No.7520636]

>>7520181
>Guy doesn't cheat when he had the option to
>Still somehow did something wrong

Women

[Anonymous No.7521014]

>>7520188
I notice that the outfit posts where I block out my face, or do floor coordinates tend to get more notes. I don't think it's because I'm ugly or anything, but because the outfit is disembodied from a person and easier for the viewer to imagine on themselves? I don't know. I probably need to learn how to pose better and look less wooden.

[Anonymous No.7521778]

Does anyone get like, post meet feels? afterwards I always feel like I could of dressed better or talked to more people or said the wrong things and so on.