Lonelita Thread

[Anonymous No.10460238]

It's been a while since I've seen a thread based around lonelita's. With the pandemic it's more important to socially distance than ever, but I find myself missing being out with other girls wearing the fashion and want to become more comfortable wearing it alone.

>What does a typical day look like for you when you're wearing lolita?
>Do you lean towards casual or more OTT?
>Now that many of us are working from home, do you enjoy your fashion choices more or less than when you had to go into a workplace?

[Anonymous No.10460327]

>>10460238

>What does a typical day look like for you when you're wearing lolita?
Visiting my grandma or aunt/ going to largest fabric and handicraft supplies market in our city/ meeting with friends/ walking alone.
>Do you lean towards casual or more OTT?
Exactly in the middle.
>Now that many of us are working from home, do you enjoy your fashion choices more or less than when you had to go into a workplace?
I spend all this time of lockdown separated from my lolita wardrobe T.T
On the other hand, sitting at home and flipping through lolita blogs, japanese shops, coords and CGL without my own wonderful clothes makes me more patient. Now I only look on what I really need.

[Anonymous No.10460330]

I wear it around the house about every other day. Neither casual nor OTT, just basic. Always cotton main piece and socks. I take one look at my poly dress and hosiery coord I prepared the previous evening and don't want to put them on because I know it will be so gross in 5 seconds. (I live in the US South). I don't wear a petti while I'm working - sitting 8 hrs in it is incomfortable, but I like to put it on after work to complete the look. I'm torn, because I want the look of matching shoes, but my feet thank me for wearing house slippers. Waiting eagerly on my Kumya ones.

Recently, I started thinking I've been pushing myself too hard to become a daily wearer, buying casual and toned-down stuff that doesn't actually spark joy and urging myself to go out for errands in it. I think my future is wearing full coords around the house only. I'm tapping more into my anti-social side in quarantine. Even compliments from fellow grocery shoppers make me uncomfortable, because to me it says "I have judged this part of you worthy this time," so whoop-dee-doo. I'm going to become a homelita, like the polar opposite of a conlita.

I need to get a cuter apron for protecting my dresses from dinner.

[Anonymous No.10460333]

>>10460238

>What does a typical day look like for you when you're wearing lolita?
Put on chill coordinate, maybe take some photos in my yard, take a walk or watch anime with my designated quarantine friend.

>Do you lean towards casual or more OTT?
Definitely casual. I own a few OTT pieces, but even in the before times I dressed the same. My wardrobe is almost all cotton solids and patterns, cardigans or simple chiffon blouses, comfy shoes, etc.

>Now that many of us are working from home, do you enjoy your fashion choices more or less than when you had to go into a workplace?
Unfortunately my work is shit and making me come in, despite the fact that I can do all my work from my couch.

[Anonymous No.10460334]

>>10460238
>>What does a typical day look like for you when you're wearing lolita?
Usually to work at my office job. Maybe to meet a friend on the weekend, but haven't been doing that lately.
>>Do you lean towards casual or more OTT?
Somewhere in the middle, depending on the weather. Hotter=more casual. I also tone down the headwear for work, even if it is slightly out of place with the coord.
>>Now that many of us are working from home, do you enjoy your fashion choices more or less than when you had to go into a workplace?
I don't wear lolita to hang out at home, and I still have to work in person some of the time. If I am going to have to do multiple delicate loads of laundry for each color, I'm going out in it!

[Anonymous No.10460371]

>>10460330
I can see people criticizing this, but I feel like wearing things for yourself and only yourself is the truest nature of this fashion. Homelitas unite!

[Anonymous No.10460379]

>>10460371
nayrt but I am also mostly a homelita. I will usually wear OTT sweet at home and sometimes I wear it out to class or whatever for short trips pre-rona but I just enjoy being cute alone in my home (plus I live in the Southern US too and it is murder here, like 103 degree average highs for hours for the last two or more months, no point in going outside a ton to sun damage and drench my burando with sweat)

[Anonymous No.10460519]

>>10460371
>tfw no robot butler

[Anonymous No.10460533]

>What does a typical day look like for you when you're wearing lolita?
Usually going antique shopping or to a craft store, sometimes to get dinner
>Do you lean towards casual or more OTT?
Depends on what dress I end up wearing that day
>Now that many of us are working from home, do you enjoy your fashion choices more or less than when you had to go into a workplace?
Im back at work so thats all normie clothes but being at home for so long and not being able to go anywhere has made me stop wearing the fashion. Dressing up at home just does not feel the same to me and I have a really fluffy dog so he always tried to get on my lap and would get fur on all my dresses.

[Anonymous No.10460558]

Do you guys wear lolita out by yourself? I don't, I need to have someone with me even if they're just a normie. I feel like I would get harassed otherwise.

[Anonymous No.10460562]

>>10460238
I mostly wear basic stuff in the house, and wear basic stuff with more effort and a face mask when going out to the grocery store.
Almost the same as usual.

...50% of the reason I started dressing in gothic lolita is concealing firearms under my poofy skirt. I used to wear rockabilly style dresses for that purpose before I got into lolita.
I moved to the south this month as and have sense felt 200% safer and 100% sweatier. I think I need to adjust to where I have humidity friendlier coords. I don't have money though because I quit my job and left everything and am pretty much a refugee I guess. I can't justify spending savings on clothes, and I found myself wearing non lolita tank tops and skirts last week.

At least I don't witness crimes on the way to kroger and I don't wake up at 1am to the sounds and smells of communists burning trash, drinking, and hitting drums outside my apartment -_-

[Anonymous No.10460564]

>>10460558
same, even if it's not negative, i don't want people starting conversations with me like
>wHaT iS tHaT StyLE caLLeD???
i have other shit to do

[Anonymous No.10460566]

>>10460558
I do because I don't have friends but even if I did, I would want to be strong enough to handle the pressure by myself.

[Anonymous No.10460574]

>>10460558
Yeah, but I have pretty thick skin. Sometimes I get comments but at least it’s not creepy catcalling like when I wear normal clothes.

[Anonymous No.10460576]

>>10460562
I used to but don't really anymore because >>10460564 . I don't feel like I should have to explain myself for liking dresses and, on top of that, I'm a shy person. 99% of the time I want to be left alone. I wear casual otome/MILK dresses daily and I still get some comments. It's annoying.

Mind you, I find its easier to just ignore them when I'm wearing a mask. Them not seeing my face makes it easy to pretend I didn't hear them. I'm not sure why. I'll probably continue wearing masks when its no longer necessary.

[Anonymous No.10460577]

>>10460574
>>10460558
Oh I forgot to add: probably the funniest thing that ever happened while wearing lolita out alone was watching someone get into a minor car accident because they rubbernecked to see my outfit and didn’t see a car stop in front of them. My coord wasn’t even that weird haha

[Anonymous No.10460579]

>>10460576

Meant to reply to >>10460558 not >>10460562

[Anonymous No.10460580]

>>10460238
>What does a typical day look like for you when you're wearing lolita?
Probably go pick up a few groceries, go to the craft store or check out the thrift shops, then get lunch. Nothing fancy.
>Do you lean towards casual or more OTT?
Middle lane, basic stuff.
>Now that many of us are working from home, do you enjoy your fashion choices more or less than when you had to go into a workplace?
I work from home on the regular, so if I want to go do something after work in lolita I feel like I have a little more time to get ready, but in general I don't go out much on weekdays anyway.

>>10460558
I wear it out alone plenty and I feel like I do get stopped more without someone with me. It's not bad, but sometimes they try to start a conversation and it's a little awkward.

[Anonymous No.10460597]

>>10460238
huechan here so there's no lolita comm in my state (or larger lolita community at all in Brazil) so I just wear lolita alone. I don't even have an instagram or something to post coords and connect with people because i'm autismo
>What does a typical day look like for you when you're wearing lolita?
Doing errands/ visiting my grandma/ going out in my yard to take photos/ going to a restaurant or ice cream shop
>Do you lean towards casual or more OTT?
Either one works, but I'll go more casual if I'm just going to the supermarket or if it's really hot out there. I'm dead scared of staining my blouses yellow.
>Now that many of us are working from home, do you enjoy your fashion choices more or less than when you had to go into a workplace?
My work has more of a business casual dress code, but I don't really see the fun in wearing the fashion alone at home. Maybe for taking photos and such, but I'd take them right off after. I don't like to encourage wear and tear on my clothing. I can still kinda see the appeal of being a homelita though, I think I just don't have the right routine for it.
>>10460558
Ideal is to be able to brunt wearing the fashion by myself, which I sometimes do, but it's kinda scary going alone. Even if a normie is with me I feel much safer from people just walking up and being rude. I just want to wear the fashion, don't talk to me or come at me about your unwarranted opinions on what I should and should not wear.

[Anonymous No.10460600]

>>10460597
> I don't even have an instagram or something to post coords and connect with people because i'm autismo
Mood

[Anonymous No.10460606]

>>10460597
>but it's kinda scary going alone
bruh you live in fucking brazil. i'd be more afraid of getting kidnapped or beheaded than rudeness if i were you.

[Anonymous No.10460608]

>>10460606
(You)

[Anonymous No.10460643]

>>10460564

Same, I hate talking to strangers and they think my clothes give them an excuse to waste my time and energy interacting with them.

[Anonymous No.10460679]

>>10460558
When i first started, yes. However, there are ways to wear the fashion in a toned down and comfortable way. it's a good idea to experiment with what makes you feel less anxious, and even breaking rules if you need to.

[Anonymous No.10460680]

>>10460600
I'm really really tempted to create an instagram but I know I'll burn out in a month or two. I've also been thinking of volunteering/selling designs for local lolita brands just so they'll have better prints to use. I'm a pretty competent drawfag and I have some ideas for prints of my own, but I have no idea how to even approach these businesses.
>>10460606
kek, I thankfully live in a good neighborhood. Most of the people that bother me are sour middle aged people or literal kids that want to be high school bullies outside of school lol

[Anonymous No.10460684]

>>10460558
Maybe the areas I lived in just has lots of other "weird" dressers so people were used to it (big cities, mostly), but I've never experienced harassment. About the strongest issue I faced were a few lingering glances. I don't wear subtle coords or casual either. I would suggest trying to go out in it and experiencing firsthand how rarely other people bother you. Equally it is clear from this thread, and other threads of horror stories dealing with normies, that my experience is not universal. Maybe it is a cultural thing in the UK not to talk to strangers in public.

[Anonymous No.10460697]

>>10460684
I live in a city and I think the issue is everyone here dresses incredibly casually. Athleisure is the norm and its rare to see people in bright colors. Even a dress with sneakers or pink coat have had comments. Nobody is malicious but I'm tired of comments like 'your're wearing a dress!' where they expect some kind of response. The comments only multiply when I wear full on lolita.

[Anonymous No.10460700]

>>10460697
Ah I get you, that sucks. The cities I have lived in are 100% full of students and have thriving alternative scenes, so I did think my perspective would be skewed. Other suggestion for you then is to try and work out where your nearest "alt friendly" town/ city is, and go there in something a bit more casual to try it out. It's really freeing to be able to walk around dressed how you want and to remain unbothered.

[Anonymous No.10460703]

>>10460697
You can say New England lol

[Anonymous No.10460779]

>>10460238
>What does a typical day look like for you when you're wearing lolita?
I will wear it on short walks, sometimes to local street fairs (before covid)

>Do you lean towards casual or more OTT?
More casual

>Now that many of us are working from home, do you enjoy your fashion choices more or less than when you had to go into a workplace?
I do not wear lolita or any fashion into my workplaces, because my work is very physical, and I do not work from home!

This year it's been hard for me to work up the courage to wear lolita out. I feel more alone as a lonelita, but I'm glad the pandemic and lockdown gave me a chance to connect more deeply with my comm online. I miss our almost nightly online meetups.

>>10460371
homelitas unite!

[Anonymous No.10460803]

>>10460597
There’s definitely a large lolita community in Brazil, just São Paulo by itself already has a lot of lolitas. Have you heard of meeting nacional? Maybe you are not interested in it, but it’s a pretty nice event where lolitas from all of Brazil get together.

[Anonymous No.10460812]

>>10460803
Really? Damn, I wasn't aware. I live in Brasilia and don't get the chance to travel often. I will absolutely look into it. I don't really have a facebook or things like that, so I hope I'll be able to find it.

[Anonymous No.10460816]

>>10460812
Most of the interactions are through fb so it might be hard without one. I know there are lolitas in Brasilia, but there’s probably not a comm since I never saw any of them going on meetups. Wishing you luck.

[Anonymous No.10460822]

>>10460816
I don't think there are any comms here, I've been trying pretty damn hard to find one. I'll create a facebook account with a fake name just to get in touch with other Brazilian lolitas, the only thing holding me back was that I'm not big on having my real name or face being out there. Being a lonelita is pain. Thanks for the advice anon

[Anonymous No.10460838]

>>10460558
I almost only wear lolita when I'm out by myself. I don't have friends who wear lolita, and don't really want to subject my normie friends of being stared at because I'm dressed weird.
But I'm from an area where people are pretty private and wouldn't normally bother strangers. They'd judge me silently instead lol

[Anonymous No.10460984]

>What does a typical day look like for you when you're wearing lolita?

usually going to someplace specific like a museum or restaurant or event.

>Do you lean towards casual or more OTT?

casual, don't think i've ever had the amount of accessories it takes to get to OTT.

>Now that many of us are working from home, do you enjoy your fashion choices more or less than when you had to go into a workplace?

god I enjoy it at home so much more. I didn't mind wearing it at work but I had a lech of a boss for a solid while which completely turned me off dressing nicely for work (very lax dress code) so not needing to deal with that now has made everything better.

>>10460558
I’m okay being out alone in lolita but dressing in casual classic just doesn't attract the sort of attention the other styles do.

[Anonymous No.10460989]

>>10460684
It definitely seems to be a cultural thing. I have never been stopped by people in the street who demand I answer stupid questions about what I’m wearing but this seems to happen all the time to others on the board. Is it an american thing to talk to strangers like that?

[Anonymous No.10460990]

>>10460989
Are you a lone lolita? Its common when you are in a group. It goes along with the are you in a play? comments

[Anonymous No.10461053]

>>10460989
Me neither, it has to be cultural. It always surprises me when i read about presumably american lolitas having those experiences. Who would just demand answers out of a stranger like that? I understand looking but asking dumb or invasive questions seems so obviously rude.

[Anonymous No.10461055]

>>10460558
i wore it out today, some kids laughed at me and then tripped, was worth it

[Anonymous No.10461059]

>>10460679
>there are ways to wear the fashion in a toned down and comfortable way
Yeah, but those ways don't do it for me. My favorite part of the fashion is lots of lace and sweet prints. I bought some Meta Frill Skirts to look casual, and I might as well be wearing jeans at that point. It's just not as fun as BtSSB Lace Frill JSK or Little Rabbit's Sparkly Rendezvous.

>>10460989
Yes. In America, it's a lot more common to for example say "Hello!" when you pass a stranger in a park, and in stores the clerks must pretend to be your friend, smiling and asking how your day was. Waiters get used to acting like your bff to earn tips. The overall culture is more chatty. Good luck smiling at a clerk in Russia. Maybe in a really huge city center like NYC people are less sociable because of the number of crazies, but the further towards the suburbs you get the more likely the person waiting in the checkout line with you is to tell you about their weekend plans and what roofing company they used.

[Anonymous No.10461061]

>>10460989
>Is it an american thing to talk to strangers like that?
Yes

[Anonymous No.10461085]

>>10461059
>>10461061
not in the fucking city, weirdos

[Anonymous No.10461185]

>>10460989
>Is it an american thing to talk to strangers like that?
Yes, and it's also a very american thing to think everyone should know your opinion. So not only will they talk to you but be openly rude as well. And then there's a lot of men who will be predators no matter what you're wearing.

[Anonymous No.10461210]

>>10460838
If it helps, most of my normie friends think it’s novel. They don’t really have to deal with it all the time so they think it’s fun to go out and have a bit of alt lifestyle attention for a day. YMMV though.

[Anonymous No.10461211]

>>10460989
>is it American
Yes, specifically midwestern and southern. Comments upthread like “people stare and might say something kinda odd” is more of an east and west coast thing.

People in the Midwest and South constantly talk to strangers about everything. It doesn’t need bother me since it’s typically kind and I grew up here, but I could see how it would be annoying.

[Anonymous No.10461213]

>>10461085
You’ve clearly never been to Chicago.

[Anonymous No.10461241]

>>10461211
South here. A family friend's Dutch niece came to visit and I took her around. She thought I knew EVERYONE by the end of it

[Anonymous No.10461273]

Does anyone from the US ever pretend they don't speak English when someone approaches them about their clothes? Asking for a friend.

(I have had a lot of Karens and men question me about my clothing over the years. It's rarely super negative but men approaching me makes me panic and I just want everyone to leave me alone and not have to constantly explain myself. I never wear it out anymore and while that may be the solution, I am wondering if anyone has any tricks.)

[Anonymous No.10461276]

>>10461273
Wear headphones.

[Anonymous No.10461278]

>>10461276
Normally that is a great idea for day to day, but when wearing lolita they still try to talk to me, wave at me, sometimes yell at me so I can hear them, or tap my shoulder which is awful. I try to ignore them but sometimes they don't let it go until I respond. It also happens if I am with a friend where we are both dressed up.

I was thinking of just learning a few phrases in french or something and hope that makes them go away?

[Anonymous No.10461279]

>>10461273
I feel like this won't work if we're white. If I were asian or latino, I'd totally do that.

[Anonymous No.10461288]

>>10461279
Why bring race into it? Whites have the most diverse set of languages, Russian, Slovak, Bosnian, Czech, German, Greek, Italian, Irish, French, and the list goes on. Or are you saying the majority of non-whites don't speak English as well? (You make a good point)

[Anonymous No.10461291]

>>10461288
There's little to no new white immigrants in the US who don't speak english. I live in the most diverse state and I've never met one in all my life. But there's tons of asian and latino people who don't speak english here, so I feel like that would be way more believable.

[Anonymous No.10461292]

>>10461288
>have the most diverse set of languages
No? I mean the other person was stupid but that doesn't mean you should be

[Anonymous No.10461293]

>>10461291
There are plenty of eastern european immigrants that don't speak english, but few are young in my experience. though, even then their english can be sketch depending on how rural their home town was.

>the most diverse state
I attempt to disbelieve

[Anonymous No.10461305]

>>10461293
where? i've met tons from russia and ukraine and they all spoke english before even immigrating here

>I attempt to disbelieve
37% white, 39% latino, 15% asian, 6% black. pretty much all other states are at least 50%+ white as far as i know.

[Anonymous No.10461308]

>>10461279
I'm >>10461273
I was mostly thinking of pretending to be a tourist. Sorry, didn't mean to spark a language debate.

I wish strangers just wouldn't feel entitled to bothering people. It's so frustrating.

[Anonymous No.10461330]

>>10461305
Those aren't Hawaii's demographics so try again

[Anonymous No.10461331]

>>10461305
A ton of Ukies don't speak English. Same with Polish, Lithuanian, Albanian, etc. pops. A lot depends on how old they are, where they lived and when they immigrated. When I lived in central Poland, young people all technically learned English but they were utter trash at it and would have been ESL tracks in school. Anyone over 30 didn't speak English at all.

[Anonymous No.10461339]

>>10461330
Hawaii has almost no black or latino people, so how is that diverse? California is by far the most diverse.

[Anonymous No.10461351]

>>10461308
I feel like if you pretend you're a tourist they'll be even more excited to show you around, educate you, be a friendly representative of the people. And there are voice translation apps now anyway.

[Anonymous No.10461353]

>>10461276
Sounds like you’ve never tried this. I wear headphones in public and still get bothered by strangers, they tap me on the shoulder until I smack them. People are persistent

[Anonymous No.10461360]

>>10461353
just say what over and over again.

[Anonymous No.10461361]

>>10461353
I have definitely tried this and the worst that happens is they talk louder sometimes and then I tell them to fuck off. Be mean.

[Anonymous No.10461362]

>>10461339
Less than 25% of Hawaii's population is white and they have a higher latino population than 41 other states.

[Anonymous No.10461369]

>>10461273
I do this just for fun. Depending on the language, Americans will either immediately stop talking to you, or they will progress into despair as they fail to communicate with what the perceive as a "foreigner". Not sharing the language I use, but Americans don't even try with me.

[Anonymous No.10461390]

>>10461085
Have you been to the south?

[Anonymous No.10461407]

>>10461273

I should do this next time.

Last time I had a nosy bitch shout at me basically why was I wearing weird clothes. Wasn't even wearing a mask. Thankfully we were in the park and not some closed space.

[Anonymous No.10461413]

>>10461362
And yet California is still the most diverse state with a fairly even spread across races, so what's your point?

[Anonymous No.10461419]

>>10460989
I’m in Western Europe and get approached by people all the time. When I visited North America (East Coast US and British Columbia) I noticed people screamed at me from across the street way more and actually seemed to expect a reply, though, which was pretty bizarre.
For reference I wear classic-sweet and regular toned down classic. I guess I look weird enough for people to take notice but approachable enough for them to ask me about what I’m wearing rather than just stare.

[Anonymous No.10461421]

I never realized it's just a fucked up American thing for people to yell at you and expect responses to their idiotic comments. I thought if I wanted to get away from that I would have to move to Japan.
Is Canada that way? I've traveled, I just never wore lolita while traveling.

[Anonymous No.10461422]

>>10461421
you just now realized that america is the rudest country? i thought the whole world knew that. our social climate is atrocious.

[Anonymous No.10461431]

>>10460238
Thoughts on black lolitas?

[Anonymous No.10461432]

>>10461431
Low hanging bait

[Anonymous No.10461442]

>>10461421
The amazing part is that you can be with other people, dressed normally, and assholes will still do this shit in a "liberal" city. One guy probably pulled a muscle with how hard he was screaming at my (male) friend and I out of his car window while we were walking down the street. Fuck the social culture here.

[Anonymous No.10461543]

i went out to run a few errands and went in a toned down gothic coord. i got a lot of people telling me that i looked nice or cute which is always a boost lol and only one or two stares. a worker started muttering to themselves about how ridiculous the store was becoming when I passed by him stocking lol. i wasnt even in his way or speaking to him.it is nice when people 'ignore' you for the most part lol

[Anonymous No.10461654]

>>10461413
Nayrt, but what is yours? Being the most diverse by your quoted percentages means you're worse off when comparing European languages and your "diversity" doesn't even categorize whites let alone what languages they speak.

[Anonymous No.10461671]

>>10461390
There are no cities in the south. People only live in California, the Pacific Northwest and New England /s

[Anonymous No.10461672]

>>10461413
What Eastern European population are you even interacting with in California? Most of us live in Chicago, New York and the Midwest

[Anonymous No.10461676]

>>10461672
Russians and post-soviets. Hell, we've even got a bunch of Russian immersion schools around here. Not nearly as many as the Spanish and Chinese ones of course.

[Anonymous No.10461677]

>>10461672
Nayrt but I live in the Central Valley and there’s a huge Eastern European and Russian population here. So much there was a giant coronavirus breakout linked to one of their churches here.

[Anonymous No.10461706]

>>10461442
Liberal cities are in a lot of ways worse. Mine is full of homeless wandering addicts that scream at you normally but go fucking nuts if you look a little different.
I'm not even exaggerating, I've been screamed at many times by these people, not just once or twice. But it's such a compassionate and tolerant city, apparently.

[Anonymous No.10461710]

>>10461361
Can confirm. Being mean works. However it means you might have a problem if you encounter this person in the future because they might remember you.

I'm a lonelita and I go out by myself usually once or twice a week. Ice cream parlors, cafe, bakeries, thrift shopping, getting groceries. P much anything but the gym or something messy. Being mean does get people off your back and often they won't approach you again. I reserve it for people who are super rude though. I wear gothic so i don't get a lot of people wondering what my deal is because america knows what goths are and i'm close enough in look to dodge questions.

[Anonymous No.10461726]

>>10461353
Yell at them for touching/yelling near you in the pandemic.

[Anonymous No.10461757]

>>10461726
having to yell at people is as undesirable as having to talk politely to them

[Anonymous No.10461763]

>>10460562
based af

[Anonymous No.10461795]

this might just be because i've dressed 'alt' all my life but i just don't understand people's reactions to clothing
Elderly ladies seem to LOVE lolita, i get nothing but compliments from most 50+ ladies, but people between 16-40 have to get all up in your shit and ask you dumb questions or, like I had the other say, whisper among themselves and keep looking back and forth at you like you can't see them doing it.
Why do they act like the've never seen someone wearing punk/goth/pastel fashion before

[Anonymous No.10461801]

>>10460562
Good for you for getting away from the bullshit, it's getting worse here and im thinking of following your lead and moving somewhere south but I HATE the heat and I feel like it would impede my ability to wear lolita

[Anonymous No.10461805]

>>10461801
Southerner here, it isn't as bad as you might think. OPs and short-sleaved boleros are you friend and don't wear anything you aren't prepared to wash well. Keep moving, find that breeze, and you'll survive the March to September hot box.

[Anonymous No.10461835]

>>10461801
Why would you feel safer in the south? I would feel much less safe if I lived there.

[Anonymous No.10461841]

>>10461835
Are you a coastfag or something?

[Anonymous No.10461843]

bbWxqNq

hmm

[Soup No.10461844]

>>10461835
You would think Southern boomers would be more likely to judge you on what you wear. That’s why I’m iffy on w/e I wanna move with my gf to OK.

[Anonymous No.10461866]

I have a question for discussion!
>Did you choose the lonelita life, or did it choose you?

I live in an area that has a decent comm that hosts meetups often, and I tried my best to be active within the comm. However after a few years of stuffy meetups with very little conversation other than “do you like my dress?” I decided to do leave and enjoy the fashion on my own. It’s been a much more fulfilling experience, and the only fake conversations I have now are with randos on the street who either want to compliment my attire or ask me questions.

[Anonymous No.10461867]

>>10461706
Idk why, but homeless have always being way more nice and polite about my clothes than most people. I’m scared when they try to talk to me, but have always been positively surprised which is honestly crazy.

[Anonymous No.10461870]

>>10461867
I've noticed this, too. Crazy-looking homeless people have actually given me the sweetest compliments. My bf says it's because they recognize that I'm crazy, too.

[Anonymous No.10461907]

>>10461835
Boomers here are chatty but they are way more likely to complement me on my cute outfit than other places I've been. I got a few amused comments joking about my outfit, but mostly complements.

Definitely feels much much safer here. I hope it still is in 20 years, but that's why I'm the gunita.

I moved in to a poorer neighboorhood with a friend who lives here and I told her that she forgot to lock her car and she was like "Why would I do that?". I thought she was just being weird but I noticed a bunch of people around here don't lock their cars.

Also we have not one, but two cool prepper neighboors! Not panic buyers, but one who has been prepping for 15 years, and another who is trying to maintain enough agriculture to feed themselves on their 1/2 acre lot. I found out that chickens are adorable and I want to take a cute picture with them somehow inbetween their poops now.

I think people here initially are wary when I first talk to them, but I think it's due to my accent more than my clothing or race. Once they realize I'm not moving here to vote liberal they relax immediately and I make instant friends.

I've never made so many friends in a new place so fast before. I think the quarantine turned some of them extra friendly though, because not as many people are socializing at church.

[Anonymous No.10461949]

>>10461907
this reads like larp. Even if you are a girl and dress well, you type like you're some osrt of realtor trying to advertise your backwater neighborhood as "rustic and charming" when momoko would call it "rice paddies, rice paddies, rice paddies"
>not here to vote liberal
go back to /pol/ we don't need more politics in this disaster of a thread

[Anonymous No.10461953]

>>10461907
Ohh so you're white and you have a gun.

[Anonymous No.10461955]

>>10461870
Guess they are in no position to judge and don’t conform to society way more than we do so what is left are pretty clothes to be complimented

[Anonymous No.10461957]

>>10461953
I know quite a few black people who feel safer in cities in the south like Atlanta over cities in the north because of the higher population density of black people, better integration, etc.

However this person is an idiot

[Anonymous No.10461994]

>>10461949
Agreed, >>10461907 is definitely a white male.

[Anonymous No.10462126]

>>10460238
>What does a typical day look like for you when you're wearing lolita?
I wear it a couple times a week, so I don't really know how to answer since it's just my daily life. I feel best in lolita when I'm in the city browsing thrift stores, but I haven't done that since March, so I have no recent lolita memories that really stand out.
>Do you lean towards casual or more OTT?
I wouldn't describe myself as either. I'm the standard cookie-cutter lolita. I prefer more iconic looks to overly decorative ones, I feel like I get buried in OTT.
>Now that many of us are working from home, do you enjoy your fashion choices more or less than when you had to go into a workplace?
I enjoy having more time to indulge in my interests, including fashion, but my choices haven't really changed since I'm an undergrad student and I turned up in full coordinates when I could be bothered to do so. My style isn't that alienating that I can do that without bringing much attention to myself.

>>10461866
>Did you choose the lonelita life, or did it choose you?
There's a small comm in my area that I've hung about with once, and one time only. I still talk to one of them, but I just don't fit in with the group at all. I followed them all on IG at the end of the meet and just started seething at what I saw. No common interests, ages are really spread out, and they just wouldn't shut up about things they know absolutely nothing about. Borderline misinforming people. During the meet, some of them were getting all wound up IRL by fake politics that only exist on social media. It literally had nothing to do with what we were doing, they just really felt the need to insert it, and I hear they're still at it. It's quite insufferable.

>>10461949
loneliness is inherently political

[Anonymous No.10462133]

>>10461866
Both in a sense- I live in an area that's really remote, but I choose to live here, I'm really blessed to be able to live here, and even though I'm three hours away from the nearest "big city," I have relatives and connections there and can always stay the night for any potential meet-ups. When the Covid situation gets under control, I'd love to be able to host more meet-ups myself.

But I hate cities. Loathe them. I can't spend more than two or three days in a city.

[Anonymous No.10462137]

>>10462133
people who hate cities are uneducated

[Anonymous No.10462143]

>>10462126
>loneliness is inherently political
cringe

[Anonymous No.10462150]

>>10460597
OK. GIRL. WE TOTALLY NEED TO BE FRIENDS. I need a cool brazilian lolita autismo girl like me to feel like the world can be better... i-if you want just add me at discord... sweetn#7388

[Anonymous No.10462153]

>>10461957
I'm not black, but I really wasn't thinking of cities because I would never choose to move to one in the south. I was thinking of the rural south where I still wouldn't feel safe.

>>10462133
I'm with you on the cities. I lived rural for most of my life and never had the worries I have now living in a bigger city. It sucks that it draws you for work, but I'm not even happy here. I don't understand why people choose this.

[Anonymous No.10462255]

>>10460822
Anon, we live in the same city
Wanna share contacts?

Please drop a throwaway email if you want so.

[Anonymous No.10462257]

>>10462255
Or a discord

[Anonymous No.10462259]

>>10460803
Anon are you from Sao Paulo? I'm meant to be going to work in USP for 3-4 months next year but at the Sao Carlos campus. I'm stressing about what to wear - I'm guessing it's cool enough to wear lolita?

I had to go work in Natal last year and it was the worst experience of my life so I'm hoping Sao Carlos is much nicer.

[Anonymous No.10462338]

>>10462137

[Anonymous No.10462358]

>>10462137
Not liking densely populated areas and high traffic at all times means im uneducated
Ok

[Soup No.10462379]

Commiefotrnia is paying me 16k in neetbux lmao. Sucks not to be a califag

[Anonymous No.10462540]

>>10460558
I do, thankfully I live in a city that’s pretty accepting. Bad interactions are rare, I mostly get compliments and I don’t really notice if people are staring anymore. If I lived in somewhere like bumfuck nowhere USA it’d probably be a different story, my sympathy goes out to people there.

[Anonymous No.10462544]

>>10462153
>I wasn’t thinking of where most people live in the south, just my own personal stereotype
Lol okay

[Anonymous No.10462546]

>>10462153
I’m trying to imagine what part of rural America you think is any safer than southern rural America and I’m drawing a huge blank. The rural Midwest, Northeast, Southwest and ESPECIALLY PNW is racist as fuck.

[Anonymous No.10462601]

>>10462544
That's because I'd feel even less safe in a city.

>>10462546
Yes, when you do see people in larger towns, they can be racist. But depending on your community, they can be avoided or restricted. I don't know of anywhere like that in the south, but there could be.

[Anonymous No.10462604]

>>10462601
I’ve read this eight times and I genuinely can’t understand what you are saying. The city is racist? But small towns aren’t? But small towns in the south somehow are?

Just admit you are sheltered and probably illiterate judging by this thread

[Anonymous No.10462638]

>>10462604
nayrt but maybe they're thinking small town in north = wealthy and small town in south= hicksville which would make sense for them to stereotype north to be not racist (at least not to their face) and south as turbo racist

[Anonymous No.10462640]

>>10462604
Most small towns in the north are literal sundown towns

[Anonymous No.10462656]

>>10462259
Are you asking about the temperature? It’s way cooler than Natal or any other north or northeast city. Most of the days are definitely cool enough to wear lolita.

[Anonymous No.10462661]

>>10462638
I'm saying judging by the South's past histories with communities like mine, I wouldn't feel safe living there. I never claimed places like that didn't exist in the larger context of the US elsewhere.

[Anonymous No.10462681]

>>10461957
You ever been to Atlanta? I’m black. I don’t feel safe there. If you mean Stone Mountain or other suburbs, now that a different story. Other predominantly black cities in the south such as Baton Rouge and New Orleans have year over year, been some of the top cities in the US for homicides. If you’re talking safe in terms of not being harassed by normies in the store or not worrying about racism in your face, sure. It’s “safer”. But not when you look at the crime stats.

[Anonymous No.10464486]

>>10460558
I never wear my Lolita in public. I am a brolita. I never stare or approach lolitas in public, but I do enjoy the fashion knowing that I have a beautiful wardrobe at home.

[Anonymous No.10472354]

Who here got nasty emails after posting their info?

[Anonymous No.10472356]

>>10462137
Found the Bitch

[Anonymous No.10472392]

I live in a major city with a lot of Lolitas, but they're known for already having their own circles and only hosting private meetings (which is fine) so I just wear lolita around the house during lockdown. Before I used to like going to museums and thrifting by myself, it felt magical desu

[Anonymous No.10472401]

I reemember someone was considering making a sort of business card about lolita that they could give to people on the street when they were asked "wHaT aRe YoU wEaRiNg?!?!?". Seems like a decent idea to me if the info about lolita on the card is solid. So you could just give them the card and get away from them, idk pretend you're gonna be late to somewhere so you don't have time to chat.

[Anonymous No.10472406]

>>10462681
You're only unsafe if you go to the ghetto. I don't feel unsafe in my middle class neighborhood.

[Anonymous No.10472413]

>>10461866
>Did you choose the lonelita life, or did it choose you?

I’d say it chose me because I had the opportunity to join comms and go to meets but felt too unpolished to do so. By the time I felt ready most of those comms had either vanished or developed into private friend groups. The only time I really want to be around a gang of lolitas is when I see the VM group posts in the classic thread just for the aesthetic result, but I have zero interest in mingling with other lolitas just to talk about the fashion face to face. Discord's more than good enough for that.

[Anonymous No.10472467]

>>10472413
I’m a lonelita myself after I moved countries and I keep seeing talk of these discord groups yet never actually SEE them! Can anyone possibly link me? I hate this lol

[Anonymous No.10472498]

If I'm out wearing lolita and I see another person also wearing it, is it rude to not acknowledge it? I Live in a big city with a big lolita community and lots of places that would attract lolita fashion (museums, tea house, Japanese markets, cute themed restaurants) so it's bound to happen.

example : If we were both wearing full coords.

[Anonymous No.10472510]

>>10472498
well, they're just clothes, so it's the same as if you're both normies wearing a spiderman t-shirt. you could be like cool tshirt bro, or you could ignore it.

[Anonymous No.10472539]

>>10472392
If you want to be a part of the community there’s a chance that if you interact enough with them on social media you will get invited to one of those private meetups. I’m not talking about forcing friendship, but showing you are interested in lolita, approachable and not a creep might be enough to get you in.

[Anonymous No.10472771]

>>10472498
I mean at least give the polite "we are passing each other on the sidewalk" nod

Is that an American thing? Does everyone else not acknowledge each other?

[Anonymous No.10472796]

>>10472771
Depending on where you are people might feel really uncomfortable if you just randomly approach them as a stranger suddenly putting them on the spot to socially engage with them

[Anonymous No.10472800]

>>10472771
see
>>10460989
>>10461185
>>10461211
>>10461059
americans will sttrike up a whole conversation instead of just nodding at you

[Anonymous No.10472809]

>>10472498
I met another lolita while at work once. She was dressed in normie clothes but had on AP jewelry and I struck up conversation with her. Ends up she didn’t know there was a local comm, had been a lonelita and was excited to join.

[Anonymous No.10472827]

>>10472809
Cute and wholesome as fuck

[Anonymous No.10472832]

I was the head of my local com until I met a lone lolita at a con in another state. She was nice and I asked her if she would like to join our com when she would eventually move here. Long story short she turned my com against me, made me hate my friends and I became a lone lolita in the aftermath. I want to post her into the ita thread but her coords are good so everyone would know it's just my stupid vendetta

[Anonymous No.10472842]

>>10472832
I want to know more so badly. This story sounds fucking crazy.

[Anonymous No.10472847]

>>10472832
tbf sounds like it might’ve been your fault? idk

[Anonymous No.10472854]

>>10472832
Spill

[Anonymous No.10472887]

>>10472847
anon literally didnt say shit about anything, shut your mouth

[Anonymous No.10473022]

>>10472539
I've considered it and even made an IG account where I'm mutuals with some people in the city, but I only check it every few weeks.

[Anonymous No.10473035]

>>10472832
Is that you, Kansas-chan?

[Anonymous No.10473043]

>>10473035
this was an absolute ride

[Anonymous No.10473093]

>>10472392
If you're in LA or NY you'll never break into those circles

[Anonymous No.10473261]

>>10473035
Nta but have you more of those old green text storys anon?

[Anonymous No.10473333]

>>10473261
I do. I don't want to be off topic so I made a thread if anyone is interested >>10473332

[Anonymous No.10473338]

>>10473333
Thank you anon will check it out!

[Anonymous No.10473435]

>>10473093
lol, it is one of those circles so that sucks actually. I'm way too chickenshit to host a meet as well. Thankfully I'm used to being a lonelita

[Anonymous No.10473939]

>>10473435
Host your own meet. That's what I do with my friends since the NYC comm hasn't done meets for who knows how long even before corona. It's just circles of friends doing their own thing

[Anonymous No.10473960]

>>10473939
Do you have any tips for hosting? I've never really been to a serious one and I'm awkward irl. Are card games ok to bring to keep things from being boring?

[Anonymous No.10474566]

>>10473960
You can bring cards or board games if you want. Doing a short introduction and asking a question at the beginning of the meet works as an ice breaker too. Most people end up chatting so don't feel obligated to plan extra things. As long as you pick a venue that has space and it isn't stupid expensive, people will come.

[Anonymous No.10474584]

>>10460558
I feel totally the opposite. I usually am very confident that I look nice and in my experience, granted I'm a little bit outgoing, most people that "poke fun" at first, after they get their comments out of the way generally are interested and end up being super cool about it once you tell them "it's just fun clothes I like" haha. Like >>10460558 I actually feel a bit guilty about making my friends or family the spotlight too, unless I 100% know the person I'm with is cool with it.

[Cunt gobbler No.10474601]

There was this one time a girl posted about how her bf said he didn't want her to wear lolita becsuse he had social anxiety and hated dealing with aggressive people every time they were out. Everybody basically said the guy was a huge pussy and she should dump him. I couldn't believe the double standard. If it was the other way around and the guy was dressing loudly I guarantee they would say that he needed to be more considerate of her feelings. Everyone on these groups is so heavily biased and it's unbearable to me.

[Anonymous No.10474614]

>in a comm for 5+ years now
>pretty sure no one likes me
>during introductions on zoom call meetups, after someone does an introduction there's usually friendly chatter among the group
>after I do my introduction, there's silence for 5 seconds and they move on to the next person
>this basically happens any time I talk or try to engage in conversation
>everything I say is met with silence or ignored, or subject is changed
>comm seems to wait to do the zoom call group photo when I leave to get a glass of water or go to the bathroom

I need to just stop trying and become a lonelita already

[Anonymous No.10474617]

>>10474614
Do you know why? Do you dress ita maybe?

[Anonymous No.10474621]

>>10474617
NTA
It's possible but some girls are super clique-y and rude to anybody who hasn't already been established in their "tribe" essentially. We like to act like people move away from this behavior when they get out of highschool but it often just happens in other settings.

[Anonymous No.10474623]

>>10474617
I wear head to toe AP and have been wearing lolita for like a decade so doubtful

>>10474621
I don't know why they're being like this for online meets, it's not like I'm a new member or they don't know me or anything...I guess I'm kinda ignored in IRL meets too though...

[Anonymous No.10474624]

>>10474623
Are you shy or introverted? I'm not super bubbly and social and I tend to get treated this way in any group setting.

[Anonymous No.10474625]

>>10474623
Do you wear makeup? Full brand doesnt automatically mean you look good.

[Anonymous No.10474626]

>>10474624
Yeah...but these are also not new people, I've known a majority of them for a few years now. And it's not like I don't say anything the entire call, just that when I do I'm usually ignored or the subject changes. At least I can post coords to Instagram and post here on /cgl/

[Anonymous No.10474684]

>>10474601
Okay "cunt gobbler". I'm sure you're not biased either. Of course there's loads of extremist views on here. You probably are a sensitive pussy since you made this post (even though I can see the point you're making).

You're assuming /cgl/ wouldn't side with the fashionable guy. Seagulls tend to jump down anyone's throat whatever the scenario so who's to say? You could have made that post yourself as an experiment instead of being a little pissbaby, kek

[Anonymous No.10474741]

>>10474623
maybe ask someone in private, like message the organizer and straight up ask them. though you may not like what you hear. you might have a bad personality and be unaware.

[Anonymous No.10474767]

>>10474741
>you might have a bad personality and be unaware.
why is it always this conclusion people jump to? if people are being shitty to someone else they are also shit, even if the other person is. it takes a good person to tell someone they aren't wanted, inviting someone out of pity or obligation and then ignoring them is the bad behavior. allowing someone in your comm and ignoring them is shitty. anon shouldn't have to ask people to be truthful with her.

[Anonymous No.10474782]

>>10474767
I brought up this specific theory because it's the one I have personal experience with. Also, the other participants are not being shitty towards her like making snide comments or calling her by a demeaning nickname. They are being neutral. She is not owed friendship. Friendship is earned. If she is possibly a conceited or rambly person, that is her own responsibility to recognize and improve. Hopefully that is not the case and there is just some misunderstanding.

[Anonymous No.10474791]

>>10474782
>not being shitty towards her like making snide comments or calling her by a demeaning nickname

If they have the gall to ignore them whenever they say anything and wait until she leaves to take group photos, do you really think they also aren't doing this in private when she's not around? Just because they aren't doing it to her face (yet) doesn't mean they aren't doing it at all

[Anonymous No.10474814]

>>10474791
It's possible to not be interested in someone without hating them. You are really riled up imagining the worst case scenario. They might not talk about her behind her back at all because they just don't care about her.

[Anonymous No.10474819]

>>10474814
there's malice in a group waiting for this person to leave to do a group shot, not once but multiple times. It takes max 2 minutes to get a glass of water, they couldn't wait for her to get back?

Something's definitely up. I'm sorry they're treating you so badly anon.

[Cunt Gobbler No.10474889]

>>10474684

Girl u ok? U need some fukk to relax?