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2023-11: Warosu is now out of extended maintenance.

/cgl/ - Cosplay & EGL

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10209225 No.10209225 [Reply] [Original]

Old thread is gone.

Time to talk about your lolita comms and events coming up in the future.

>> No.10209296

How is the SF commity? I'm a little bummed that it's the only bay area comm, because I'm in the south bay and will have drive an hour just to go to any meets.

>> No.10209379

>>10209296
There are meets in San Jose. There is a laser tag one in SJ at the beginning of August.

>> No.10209384

>>10209379
Where are you seeing that? I usually only see posts about the monthly meets in SF, and I can't host my own since I'm a newbie lolita. SJ ones would be great.

>> No.10209393

>>10209384
If you check the events calendar, it's publicly listed for the entire group. Lots of people live in SJ, so there are a good number of meets held there. Also, if you happen to see a meet you want to go to in SF, plenty of people drive up so you can usually find a carpool.

>> No.10209394

>>10209393
Thanks anon!

>> No.10209404

My local comm recently split into two different groups. All the nice people went into the new group and only the shitty mean clique and newbies stayed in the old one. I'm feeling sad because the new group is focused on a different region and it's pretty far from where I live now. I think I'll still drive out to see my friends because the old comm is only having really overpriced meets now and there's a bitchy girl that talks over everyone.

>> No.10209478

i haven't been able to go to any meets since october, but my comm is having a meetup for a pop up bakery this month and i'm honestly so excited! i really love my comm and have been really bummed i haven't been able to make it up to see them recently. how far do other people travel for events? it'll be about a 4 hour trip from home for this meet, but i don't see it as a hassle since i get to see some really wonderful people.

>> No.10210216

Our comm bitches about there not being meets ever but when there are no one ever comes to them.

>> No.10210218

>>10209478
ooh pop up bakery sounds delicious and fun!

>> No.10210254

I need some advice. My comm is tiny, like so tiny I'm not even sure it can be called a comm, we're talking >5 people. Last year we got a new member who claimed to just be getting into lolita but hadn't bought anything yet. Despite all the help we've been trying to give her; telling her where to buy, informing her of sales, how to get her measurements ect she still doesn't own anything. There's so few of us we don't really want to turn anyone away but like we're a community for people in lolita fashion. Has anyone else managed to successfully convert a lolita at heart to an actual lolita? Or should we cut her off until she actually buys something?

>> No.10210259

>>10210254
Normally I'd say don't bother, but you sound pretty desperate, have you thought about dressing her up? She might have a mental block against it but feel more encouraged when she actually sees herself in the clothes.

>> No.10210264

>>10210254
Did you recommend her affordable lolita like taobao, or just brand? Let her know she can get everything for cheap and she may be more willing to invest.

>> No.10210307

>>10210264
She wasn't willing to spend $30 on a dress from Aliexpress that I could personally vouch for the quality of (Brand; no. Baby's first; decent) Like you can't even get a regular dress for that price around here.

>> No.10210330

>>10210254
>>10210307

I'm not the mod of my comm so this is secondhand stories.

We have a few that won't spend money like this, but generally they'll go in the handmade route, or drop out by themselves.

And then there was that one girl, doesn't sew so no handmade, doesn't own lolita so it was hard for the rest of us to figure out what to talk to her about. nbd, our comm somehow has a lot of transient members, students who are just here for a few months, people who come to one meet in cosplay and never return, whatever. So people just don't really immediately cling to each other like like besties since people are always coming and going, and nobody really connects with her despite her being in the comm for a few months, which apparently made her mad. Finally she flips her shit, calls us all elitists and flounced to start her own comm. Ironically she started buying lolita after that, I guess to prove that she is a real lolita...

Sorry, I'm not sure that it helps your case. imo if she's not willing to spend $30 and doesn't sew it's pretty much downhill from there, to get into lolita you have to be willing to spend way more than that.

I did know another girl that didn't buy anything for 6 months because she was losing weight before she started buying, maybe check that's not the case with your girl before you cut her off?

>> No.10210404

>>10210254
based on your stories, literally don't bother. even if she does eventually come around to wearing the fashion, the fact that she's resistant to help and encouragement, and the fact that she's so miserly despite claiming to want to get into a fashion that requires disposable income, doesn't bode well on the personality front. If she wears the clothes, that won't stop her from doing things like complaining about the price if inexpensive meetups, waxing and waning about how the fashion is too much work, etc. Plus, a bad egg like this can make a bigger impact on a small comm than if she was just a drop in the ocean in a bigger comm. Cut the bitch loose.

>> No.10210499

How're the Taiwan, Korea and Singapore comms?
I've been trying to narrow down a place to visit this year, and it seems like it'll be fun to meet with some of the local lolitas too.

>> No.10210508

My comm only wants to go to cheap/free places for meetups. It is so annoying especially for high teas. We only go to the same cheap places and it is not like they serve great food or anything. Also when we have potluck, most try to just buy something for like $2 at the place we meet.

>> No.10210657

What is it about loita that attracts the most aggressive, actively hateful, type of person?

I initially thought the community would have more calm, reserved members but so far all ive seen are girls who act like if they don't talk shit every hour on the hour they might die.

>> No.10210662

>>10210657
Are you talking about 4chan? The majority of girls in my local comm are really chill and genuinely kind people. Same with most that I've met at bigger events.

>> No.10210666

>>10210657
The shittiest people in my comm are all very spoiled and think they’re the center of the universe, which probably played a part in attracted them to such a princessy fashion as lolita in the first place.

Though like >>10210662 most girls are really chill and the spoiled princesses are just a small, annoying minority.

>> No.10210846

I’m worried about my local comm, the main person that hosts meets has decided to stop and all the mods seem to be hosting are high teas.

I hope some more casual meets come up soon, I like the comm when I can make meets but I don’t like high tea.

>> No.10210852

>>10210666
Get thee behind me

>> No.10210854

>>10210846
you the captain now

>> No.10210907

>>10210854
I would but I work a lot of weekends and have to travel into where the comm is.

>> No.10211053

>>10210907
Then you can schedule it at a time when you're free from work AND schedule it in the city where the comm is. What's the issue?

>> No.10211206
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10211206

I really don't have any business being anyone's mentor, but I'm trying to coach a new lolita in my comm. A part of me really wants to do my best to steer her away from wa but I just can't bring myself to criticize her lolita dreams.

>> No.10211212

>>10211206
There are more examples of good wa nowadays, show her examples of good and bad examples and explain what the difference is. Maybe encourage her to get a good grip on regular lolita first before branching out, or choosing easier methods of coording wa before getting experimental (like using a printed wa dress coorded a normal way)

>> No.10211297

>>10211206
It's also good to mention to her that wa has less wearability. You can't really wear wa in a normal everyday setting, whereas other styles can be. So if she spends her money on a wa coord, she'll only be able to wear it once or twice a year at most versus several times a month for a normal outfit.

>> No.10211300

>>10210508
Host a fancy tp yourself then
>>10211206
That dead girl did good wa lolita. I dont have the pic soz

>> No.10211330

>>10210508
i have the same problem ive decided that if i want to have a fancy event i'll have to host it and ask everyone for $5 so i i'll prepare all the food and not worry about people bringing dumb things.its a little hard when you don't have a large place to host but i think its doable!

>> No.10211365

>>10211300
I have tried to host a few fancy tea-parties, but everytime people complain that the prices are too high and we don’t reach the minimum amount of people needed to make the meet possible. (It takes at least 15-20 people to rent a private rooms for High-teas.) And it is not like those were all super expensive High-teas, they were between 30-50$ and had three or more rounds of food. The budget ones often only have one round, sometimes two, so you also get more food. It is not like they have to pay more for the same quality/quantity.

>>10211330
My comm already wouldn’t pay $5 for that unfortunately. They rather say “I will bring my own food.” and then eat all the stuff you have made for free.

>> No.10211368

>>10209404
You’re talking about SoCal, aren’t you?

>> No.10211468

>>10211365
ditch them then, you'll be better off having your own fun then trying to work around people who won't even spend $5

>> No.10212152
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10212152

>Comm member wants to host a meet this weekend and puts up a poll to pick the day
>other gal votes on poll
>other gal makes a themed meet on the next weekend
>other gal changes mind and fully aware of the meet this weekend, decides to switch her themed meet to the leading day on the poll
>Bonus: not only do you have only 3 days to prepare a coord, but actually less than that because she has to contact you for which color you get to wear.
I'm not sure if her decision was deliberately spiteful and cunty, or a matter of her availability changing and poor judgment. All I know is that we have too few meets as is. There was really no need to schedule that on the same day.

>> No.10212171

>>10212152
>she has to contact you for which color you get to wear.
What kind of event entails that you don't get to pick what color you want to wear? I'm not in a comm and I get that themed events have dress codes or specific brands and themes they want to follow, even specific prints or series (in the case of those giant VM meetups in Japan) but I've never heard of the organiser choosing the color coord that attendees get to wear. That sounds like a disaster waiting to happen. Or am I just retarded and this is a common thing?

>> No.10212310

>>10211053
Theoretically I could but I haven’t got much knowledge about what places are good or not.

Chill, dude, I’m just saying that I’m sad she’s not going to be in the comm as much.

>> No.10212785

>>10211368
I stopped going to meets because of that girl. She has to criticize every word out of everyone's mouths

>> No.10212801

>>10212171
I move a lot and have been part of 4 different comms. Unless you're doing some sort of rainbow photoshoot, it's really weird imo.

>> No.10212802

>>10212171
Someone in my comm hosted a Pride meet where every attendee wore a different colour of the rainbow. I... did not go.

>> No.10212809

>>10212802
who cares if you went

>> No.10212817

>>10212802
But did the organiser pick which color everyone wore? That’s what I thought was weird about other anon’s post.

Pride meets sound ok in theory but I’m not into rainbows, even though I’m gay. If the idea is to have a meet at pride and provided a lot of the comm is actually LGBT it could be cute. But as far as colors go, what did the goths do? Wear moitie blue?

>> No.10212818

>>10212817
As a bi moitiefag I'd put my goth soul on ice temporarily for pride. But red works well too.

>> No.10212820

>>10212171
>>10212801
>>10212802
>>10212817
Yeah, the meet in question is a pride rainbow meet.

>> No.10212823

>>10212818
True there a lot of red and dark green moitie pieces out there. I just seem to associate moitie with black, white and occasionally the famous blue. For the record I’m a lesbian classicfag so once that plaid VM release is out it’s gonna be over for all you guys.

>> No.10212862

>>10212823
>plaid VM release
Godly taste. Please sweep me off my feet

>> No.10212869

>>10212818
juju pls

>> No.10212879

>>10212869
Nah I'm a total nobody. Did you just out her though?

>> No.10212883

>>10212879
she outs herself on a daily basis that beautiful bitch <3

>> No.10212889

>>10212883
Never met her but I love her coords, I have so many saved in my inspo folder. Good to hear someone I admire is as fun as she seems, thanks anon

>> No.10212893

>>10211206
My personal tip for good wa is to have at least a semi-decent knowledge of kitsuke. The lolita mentioned by >>10211300 wore kimono as well and knew how to coord it quite nicely, so it gave her a step up in making good wa coords. Good wa is not impossible even for a newbie to lolita, but you can't be going for those bodyline yukata sets lol

>>10211365
Just set it up like "tickets". Don't have a ticket, you're not allowed to come to the meet. Might weed out a lot of people but hey at least you'll have a pretty nice meet you're not paying completely out of pocket for.

>> No.10212902

>>10212883
I'm engaged but Juju could wife me anyday

>> No.10212906

>>10212902
I'm engaged and unworthy but I'd wife her too

>> No.10212914

>>10212906
>>10212902

>that feel when you will never have a cute gay goth gf >;

>> No.10212973

>>10212906
I hope your fiance leaves you. You'd going to be married and talking about wanting other people. Shame anon.

>> No.10212988

>>10212973
To be fair my SO thinks she's beautiful too and we joke about which friends we'd have threesomes with. It's all harmless fun and just appreciation of their aesthetic.

>> No.10213000

>>10212973
jealousy isn't a good look anon

>> No.10213684
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10213684

our next meetup is at Cracker Barrel. at first i was laughing, but then i realized it was observing the lolita meetup thread. what coord theme i should go with?

>> No.10213709

>>10213684
Cuntry. Ofc.

>> No.10213716

>>10213709
Thanks Hamlet.

>> No.10213718

>>10213684
country

>> No.10213900

>>10212785
You and a lot of other people as well. Shame how one person can ruin everyone’s fun like that.

>> No.10214023

>>10213684
Strawberries and wicker.

>> No.10214024

>>10213900
Why are you guys so closed off?
You'd have a lot more members to work with if it wasn't so hard to get first interactions.

>> No.10214051

>>10214024
What even is your rebuttal, you more high than me, bitch?

>> No.10214318

>>10214024
I don't think anyone was closed off when loud mouth girl joined us. She just constantly one-ups everyone and acts like she's joking when she's really just being an asshole.

>> No.10214388

>>10214051
I might be.
>>10214318
I tried to get involved with the group when I can down to visit but your fb is a ghost town and the girls I met were really skittish. 2 + 2 = wtf

>> No.10215143

Inb4 "we're sick of hearing x comm"

I visited another comm outside of mine and after a few hours, I ended up hearing again how my comm is bad and cliquey. During cons, I visit other comms and with the most recent one, I was embarrassed. My comm is one way or another always the talk of how shitty it is. How unwelcoming it is or cliquey they can be and referencing "Mean Girls" a lot. I'm tired of it but I know if I address it to my comm out loud they'll just completely deny it and say how every other comm is against them. I'm finally seeing what others are saying.
You guys can figure out my comm. It's the most infamous one of Texas.

You think after the drama that we've endured, we would be better people, to each other, to new people, and be more welcoming but we just became the worst, with fake smiles for the camera.

I'm so sorry for everyone dealing with how shitty my comm can be. But I doubt my comm will ever change. They're good holding vendettas but no so good taking feedback at their flaws to change for the better.

>> No.10215174

>>10215143
I'm sorry you're dealing with this first hand anon. Sucks.

>> No.10215223

>>10215174
I wish everyone would have the balls and call them out already. I know it's another drama in the comm but I'm hoping it'll get them to change

>> No.10215294

>>10214388
No one wants to host meets because she'll join, of course. She feels obligated to be a part of every conversation, even if no one is talking to her and she'll yell across the table if she has to. Then she'll remind you that she's the best at whatever you're talking about and your opinions are trash.

You really seem out of the loop, anon. You must not have had the pleasure of meeting her. That or you're her or some roleplayer.

>> No.10216723

I have a question for those who are in or mod large comms, or have comms that are in very large areas where not everyone in the comm can travel to regions for a 2-4 hour meet.

My comm is now too big for facebook to auto-send invites. So mods have to manually invite everyone.

Do you usually break you comm into smaller groups for the purposes of smaller meets? Do you keep a main comm for everyone?

Culling doesn't seem to be resolving the issue.

What works for you, and what hasn't?

>> No.10216750

>>10216723
1. Friend ppl so it’s easier to make events. Annoying but it works.

2. Make events in bigger towns so the most can go

3. Have a variety of big and small meets for diversity, same with cheap and expensive. It’s fine that some ppl show up to some not others.