/cgl/ - Cosplay & EGL

[Anonymous No.10036752]

Who else here have to deal with accusations of fetishes in order to just enjoy Lolita? I know theres some fellow true bloods out there who just follow the board for intricate cosplays and beautiful coords regardless of the haughty thot that may be wearing it.

[Anonymous No.10036754]

>>10036752
Who is accusing you of being a fetishist and why?

[Anonymous No.10036755]

Why can't you enjoy it for both of those things? Pretty or arousing or maybe both of those? Why does it matter and why are you bothered, gull?

[Anonymous No.10036766]

>>10036755
Im not aroused by it, and its people who are that are tainting the entire thing.
>>10036754
Seems like everyone is. You mention it and its like REEE PERVERT GET OUT and I have to undergo some kind of examination every time.

[Anonymous No.10036769]

>>10036766
It feels like you're intentionally avoiding giving any context. Why is that?

[Anonymous No.10036772]

>>10036769
Ntayrt but the only people I have ever met who actually slut shame are on 4chan.

[Anonymous No.10036773]

>>10036769
Context as to?

[Anonymous No.10036775]

>>10036773
Are you male?

[Anonymous No.10036778]

>>10036766
Are you one of the random guys that feels the need to say "I'm male and enjoy looking at lolita, im not a fetishist!" The thing is, once you announce that, gremlins on this board will take pot shots at you. You're perfectly allowed and welcome to like lolita and cosplay for the aesthetics, plenty of people do that. You're valid, no need to try and get validity here, you'll be shot down if you invite yourself to be shot down, lolitas aren't just "haughty thots" lmao

[Anonymous No.10036779]

>>10036766
So what you're saying is, that on this cosplay and EGL board, whenever you post that you enjoy lolita, you are met with responses from pretty much everyone accusing you of being a fetishist? Is this what you're saying?

[Anonymous No.10036782]

>>10036773
Specifically, who is 'everyone'? Get out of where? What is prompting these accusations?

[Anonymous No.10036784]

>>10036775
Probably is, and he's probably a legit creeper too.
>>10036752
>haughty thot
yikes

Take notes, op, if you're called out for being a fetishist or a creeper, you probably say shit that makes you come across that way and need to cut that shit out. If lolitas are put off by you, just leave them alone and appreciate the fashion from your own corner of the internet.

[Anonymous No.10036791]

I think this is the guy I yelled at in /k/ for trying to get a lolita girlfriend. Dudes a creeper, ignore em


>t. The /k/ommando drawfag

[Anonymous No.10036798]

>>10036784
To be frank, there be a few haughty thotties.

[Anonymous No.10036811]

>>10036752
Are you the retard from the discord thread that wanted to creep a lolita discord but couldn't because you don't actually wear the fashion?

[Anonymous No.10036816]

>>10036811
Theres a discord?

[Anonymous No.10036821]

>>10036816
You're either lying or don't browse the board frequently. Either way no one wants you or your dumbass thread here.

[Anonymous No.10036824]

>>10036752
>haughty thot
yeah, I wonder why you get called a creepy fetishist

[Anonymous No.10036826]

>>10036766
>its people who are that are tainting the entire thing.

[Anonymous No.10036828]

>>10036821
Im not that Anon. Honestly didnt know there was a cgl discord

[Anonymous No.10036893]

>>10036824
Says the t h o t

[Anonymous No.10036908]

>>10036893
>tells you to stop calling everyone a thot bc that's probably your issue
>"T-Thot!!!"

[Anonymous No.10037001]

Nowadays if you are a girl and dare do anything that The Men™ dislike you are a thot. And even if you are a "pure virgin" they'll find something else to hate.
Just men being garbage in general. Nothing new.
>inb4 weh weh sjw/manhating feminist
You don't need to be one to realize that it's mainly the truth. Girls are also guilty of it but mainly because they internalized that nasty behavior

[Anonymous No.10037006]

>>10036893
Says the ghost you can fuck every night, get out of here and take your disgusting ectoplasm with you

[Anonymous No.10037057]

>>10036784
This post OP.
I know plenty of other men that are fans of the culture and none of us have been called out on some creeper shit. What are you doing m8

[Anonymous No.10037058]

>>10037001

[Anonymous No.10037077]

>>10037057
my boyfriend (who isn’t a lolita) admires everything about it but doesn’t join discords to do “research” or join our safe spaces looking for attention like OP. My bf thinks it’s cute but understands that unless he wears lolita and makes a concentrated effort to pass as female, he needs to stay far away from any community. Like is it that hard for anon to admire shit from afar? Unless you wear lolita and are not a fucking sissy, men need to stay the fuck away.

[Anonymous No.10037292]

A lot of the confusion comes from the name. It's really just unfortunate that the street fash and the book/connotation had to have the same name.

[Anonymous No.10037588]

>>10037001
Anon, I'm guessing you don't actually know many men irl? No one is going to see you as a "thot" unless you are openly promiscuous, bringing up your sex life in casual conversation, posting risque pictures of yourself online, or other trashy, undignified behaviors. I've had male friends since high school, and none of them have called me a thot or criticized me over petty things. The majority of men aren't the bitter incels you see on /r9k/.

[Anonymous No.10037593]

>>10036754
>>10036766
>>10036772
Some guy started messaging me on facebook and told me that it's obvious to everyone that I dress in lolita because I wanted to be fucked wearing it. Fucking degenerates are everywhere.

[Anonymous No.10037596]

>>10037593
That is shitpost material. How can people actually say things like that without anonymity?

[Anonymous No.10037600]

>>10037596
because in his mind, I am a sick degenerate that gets off on dressing like an "innocent child" . So by saying things like that he is shaming be by pointing out my sick fetish. So he's the normal one in his mind.

[Anonymous No.10037607]

>>10037588
>not realizing by now that /cgl/ is /r9k/ with frills

[Anonymous No.10037609]

>>10037607
Seagulls cannot be robots, the water and sea salt would make them rusty. They wouldn’t stand a chance :(

[Anonymous No.10037676]

>>10037609
Plus robots cannot enjoy a salty French fry

[Anonymous No.10037688]

>>10037676
The best reason to be a gull rather than a robot

[Anonymous No.10037695]

>>10037688
true dat.... true dat

[Anonymous No.10037727]

>>10036752
If you're a man/m2f, you deserve it. If you're a woman, hang out with better people.

[Anonymous No.10037837]

>>10037588
I think you're part of the problem since you pretty much have that mentality.

[Anonymous No.10037872]

>>10037837
Is it really that difficult to at least pretend to have self respect? You can't expect people to see you as anything better than what you portray yourself as.

[Anonymous No.10037882]

Since it's related, I know a guy who owns tons of dresses, but never really wears them because he's afraid of getting bullied by both men & women.

[Anonymous No.10037889]

>>10037882
Thing is, if you dress unconventionally, you will likely get remarks, especially when you're not cute/pretty in some way. It's okay, if someone thinks lolita looks stupid, fine.
But I do have a problem with guys saying "you dress this way because you want to be fucked" and when you deny it tell you to stop denying it because "it's obvious" and "they know" . Now, when you are wearing very revealing clothes it's still wrong, but I can kinda see where they're coming from. But lolita fashion is very modest so it's even crazier.

[Anonymous No.10037891]

>>10037889
I think you're taking some rando's bullshit opinion way too seriously and personally. So some guy "accused" you of wearing lolita because you're into some fetish, and? It's baseless but not a new thing that normies say to us. I understand that you're upset but that retard has no power over you.
Besides, this thread was started by a guy who's sad because he has no qt lolita gf so your experience isn't what's being discussed here.

[Anonymous No.10037893]

just stop bringing up that you are a man constantly, no one cares, and no one needs to know. Why is it on any other board, if you say you're a girl, the guys there shit on you, but here men always bring it up even when it's irrelevant and throw shit fits when they're called out? Fuck offfff

[Anonymous No.10037895]

>>10037891
It's just shocking to me that there is a guy out there who thinks like that. I checked his profile and it seems he has a little daughter/niece. So a guy who's first association with lolita is "you dress as a little girl because you want to be fucked" is concerning. "She asked for it" is rapist lingo. Yet, he perceives this to be totally normal and thinks that basically the rest of the world would agree with him.
So yeah, he doesn't bother me personally, it's just unsettling that this is a thing.

[Feels Thread: 4chan is dying e(...) No.10037898]

>>10037893
Bc obviously how dare he, a man, not be acknowledged for being, in fact, a man

[Anonymous No.10037902]

>>10037895
Yeah, some normies are disturbing this way, especially the ones who have children themselves. I recall some online magazine featured lolita fashion for halloween way back when, and described us as "Victorian baby prostitutes", which further goes to show that nornies come up with the worst degenerate shit and they don't even realize it.

[Anonymous No.10037914]

>>10037902
Oh wow, that's really one of the worst description I have ever read. And the scary part is, like you said, they don"t even realize it.

[Anonymous No.10037919]

>>10037889
men are obsessed with sex. They also think that women only dress for their pleasure, so that must mean that women wear lolita for their pleasure. therefore it must be a weird sex thing for them.
obviously not all men, but most men think this way.

[Anonymous No.10037926]

>>10037891
I do realize that random people's opinions shouldn't have power over anyone, but I completely understand why someone would be bothered by strangers thinking that their fashion choice is a fetish, and be deterred from getting into lolita because of it. I can deal with people thinking my clothes are weird, but for me it would be too humiliating for people to think that:
1. My clothes are part of some kind of ageplay kink
and
2. I'm debased enough to act out said kink in public
Sweet isn't really my style to begin with, but even if it were, I'd be afraid to wear it in public because of the associations with ddlg or "little girl clothes".

[Anonymous No.10037962]

>>10037872
I'd love to know what you define "self respect" as. So many people attempt to throw this phrase around without an actual meaning behind it. Sleeping with a high number of people doesn't mean you don't respect yourself.

[Anonymous No.10038035]

>>10037962
>Sleeping with a high number of people doesn't mean you don't respect yourself.
whew

[Anonymous No.10038095]

>>10037962
Self-respect means valuing yourself and not letting other people take advantage of you. "Sleeping with a high number of people" implies that you are letting people who you barely know (met at a party, bar, or tinder), and have no significant connection with, use you to fulfill their desires. For the most part these people don't care about you, won't remember anything about you besides the shape of your body, and see you as just another thing to provide them with momentary pleasure. If you respected yourself you would only give your body to someone deserving: a person who you've known long enough to develop mutual care and trust for. You can't value yourself very highly if you give people you don't know or trust intimate access to your body. It's inherently degrading.

[Anonymous No.10038215]

>>10038095
>Self-respect means valuing yourself and not letting other people take advantage of you
Having sex with someone is not being taken advantage of? What you're describing sounds like rape.

[Anonymous No.10038228]

>>10038095
>For the most part these people don't care about you, won't remember anything about you besides the shape of your body, and see you as just another thing to provide them with momentary pleasure.

I've only slept with one person (and have been continuing to do so for the past two years in a loving relationship) but who's to say someone who sleeps with a shitton of people doesn't have this same mentality? It's not like it's one-sided, both parties get something they want out of it.

[Anonymous No.10038249]

>>10038095
What if you're using their dick to fulfill your desires? If I want to ride some bearded bear dude until my clit goes numb, im pretty sure thats MY desire

[Anonymous No.10038804]

>>10038249
b-b-but sex is soooo degrading!!!

>>10038095
sounds like such a typical fucking r9k retard.

[Anonymous No.10039052]

>>10038804
>b-b-but sex is soooo degrading!!!
This but unironically.

[Anonymous No.10039080]

>>10039052
it's not though you fucking asexual retard.

[Anonymous No.10039126]

>>10038249
ew

[Anonymous No.10039141]

>>10038249
That's not "sleeping with a high number of people".

[Anonymous No.10039214]

>>10039141
So what if I do? What if I put on my prettiest socks, hunt me down about 2 to 3 burly men a week to either pound my burando loving ass or suck their balls to dust? Its all for my benefit.

[Anonymous No.10039228]

>>10039214
>suck their balls to dust
>until my clit goes numb

Not the retard who's been baiting you, nor do I even particularly agree with him, but I think the idea is that the people you sleep with in those circumstances probably do not respect you. That isn't necessarily true I think- there are some chill liberal dudes who can pump and respect. But there are certainly a lot of dudes who would not respect you in this encounter.

And regardless of whether you get something out of the deal, you are being disrespected, and appear to think this is ok. Most people, when disrespected, have an instinctual need to retaliate, because if you let yourself be disrespected enough you end up bullied and a social reject. So I think it confuses retard anon that you can suffer disrespect and not care.

This is retarded, because retard anon is saying this on 4chan of all places.

[Anonymous No.10039234]

>>10039228
>Im being disrespected for having mutual sexual contact for the gratification of both parties

You're talking like a fat ita.

[Anonymous No.10039238]

>>10039234
Come on now. You know there are dudebros who basically just see you as a high status fleshlight. Ironically trying to validate their own self worth through sexual conquest. But they actively disrespect you to their fellow dudebros, and probably during the encounter too if you let them.

I think its probably perfectly dignified to not care what insecure dudebros think. But you *are* being disrespected by them.

[Anonymous No.10039242]

>>10039238
i am a dudebro who makes it a point to fuck a lot of women (and girly men) and i can tell you i do not ever disrespect my partners behind their back(s)

i do disrespect them to their face in the bedroom though, because that's hot, but i recognize that they're my equals outside of it

stop projecting you little whore, come squat on my dick instead

[Anonymous No.10039244]

>>10039234
Not that anon but it's more like being disrespected because you're treated like an object rather than a human, and nothing more.

[Anonymous No.10039259]

>>10039242
Not all dudebros, senpai. But you know there are dudebros who do this. You're being dense.

[Anonymous No.10039268]

>>10039259
has a dudebro done it to you before, babe

is that what happened, did you get disrespected

[Anonymous No.10039270]

>>10039238
There are dudebros who I basically sees as body temperature dildos. Whats your point? I aint being disrespected. We both go in for a goal, we both get off, and then we have waffles. Sounding more and more like a puritanical virgin, gull.

[Anonymous No.10039278]

>>10039270
My point is
1) You are in fact being disrespected
2)
>Most people, when disrespected, have an instinctual need to retaliate, because if you let yourself be disrespected enough you end up bullied and a social reject. So I think it confuses retard anon that you can suffer disrespect and not care.

and as a counter to my own point
3)
>I think its probably perfectly dignified to not care what insecure dudebros think.

But do you see how your activity runs counter to the social intuitions people have about respect? Most people are doing social stuff intuitively without thinking about it.

[Anonymous No.10039286]

>>10039278
Im still not being disrespected. I find the men. I fuck them. I leave.

[Anonymous No.10039300]

>>10039286
If a guy says, about you, to other people- that he thinks you're pathetic trash and a joke- how is that not disrespecting you? I'm pretty sure that's disrespect with an underline.

Now let me be clear- I don't think you are any of that for sleeping with him! I think he's a miserable shitlord for acting this way. And you should be treated with respect.

I'm just saying there are toxic dudebros (not all dudebros) who do this behind your back. And plenty of salty bitches who would spread the gossip. So you are, occasionally, being disrespected by some people sometimes as a result of your promiscuous behavior.

The correct response- the self-respecting response- is "fuck the haters". But to deny the *existence* of haters is kind of dense, don't you think?

[Anonymous No.10039306]

>>10039300
None of these guys talk like that though and I rotate through them depending on my mood. They know full well I use them for sex. Honestly the shit you're spouting sounds like feminist garbage.

[Anonymous No.10039314]

>>10039306
If it wasn't for feminism you wouldn't have the freedom to fuck around in the first place.

[Anonymous No.10039327]

>>10039306
>None of these guys talk like that though
maaaybe you're right, but prooobably you're naive. I say that because I attended and remain active in a co-ed fraternity, and have listened to the sexual conquest of dudebros quite a bit.

At any rate it doesn't matter. You're still right and well within your rights. I'm just trying to puzzle out the psychology of your critics.

[Anonymous No.10039562]

>>10039278
>You are in fact being disrespected
How the fuck do you know when someone is literally telling you how they feel and you are saying they don't feel that way? You're fucking stupid.

[Anonymous No.10039946]

>>10039286
For men, this is normal behavior. Evolutionary psychology. Men want their offspring to be spread far and wide because they don"t necessarily have to care for them and a few might die anyway. For women this behavior is strange.
Women use their sexuality for different reasons, they want healthy offspring, but also she wants men to take care of her and her offspring. So she would sleep with men who were either likely to produce healthy offspring, men who were some kind of authority to protect her and her offspring and men who would provide for her and her offspring.
Women who were considered desireable by men had the chance to chose wisely.
Women who were less diserable had to take every chance they got so they stood a chance to not only be impregnated but also for at least one man to stick around.

[Anonymous No.10039949]

>>10039946
Birth control exists so this is pretty irrelevant.

[Anonymous No.10039955]

>>10039949
Birth control being around for like 80 years does not mean that thousands of years of evolution are erased from your genes.
Of course we're not conciously thinking about this and making these descisions.
Still, women sleeping around a lot is not the healthiest behaviour. It might be a phase though.

[Anonymous No.10039960]

>>10039955
>women sleeping around a lot is not the healthiest behaviour.
According to who exactly?
Also I can not buy into this fucking tired ass evolution argument that I used to see on /adv/ all the time. Sorry but evolution doesn't influence my decisions sexually what so ever. I make my own decisions as I'm a coherent individual and I can assure you there is no small evolutionary voice in the back of my head that is being disrespected because I'm female. Good fucking lord.

[Anonymous No.10039962]

>>10039960
If you really think this doesn't influence you, you're beyond hope. You might think you're on top of everything, but in the end, humans are also animals and have instincts. Also, mus descisions and behaviours are conducted by your subconcious without you even knowing, and that's scientific fact. So yeah, you're in denial. Go read a book.

[Anonymous No.10039963]

>>10039962
>scientific fact
According to who?
Pretty sure I'm better off not having kids and sleeping with who ever I want when ever I want. I'm in a completely monogamous relationship as of 2 years by choice and am not the other amusing anon who I completely back in opinion because once upon a time I was young and single.

[Anonymous No.10039998]

>>10039962
>that's scientific fact
anyone who feels the need to state this can generally be disregarded.

Evo Psych isn't science dipshit. There's no experimental method applied to it whatsoever. No control group. No null hypothesis. No meta-analysis. No pre-registered studies. And tons of publicaiton bias. Seriously, show me a fucking p-value about "thousands of years of human evolution". Can't do it? Fuck off.

>>10039562
I see the confusion. You're interpreting "disrespect" as an emotion you feel. I'm interpreting "disrespect" as a social thing that happens to your reputation whether you are even aware of it or not. Literally, an event in which one person communicates to another person that they think you are not deserving of respect.

I completely understand you are not offended by your trysts. I also understand if you give absolutely not fucks what people say behind your back- I admire that really. I'm just saying- as a matter of fact- some nasty people are probably saying shit behind your back. And it baffles some people that this does not concern you.

[Anonymous No.10040032]

>>10039998
>some nasty people are probably saying shit behind your back. And it baffles some people that this does not concern you.
This. And people are less likely to take you seriously in general, especially if you get sexually assaulted.

[Anonymous No.10040332]

>>10039998
>some nasty people are probably saying shit behind your back. And it baffles some people that this does not concern you.
Oh because that's been happening since high school. My dad molested me and people I went to school with called me a whore behind my back and a girl who claimed to be my friend didn't even stand up for me.

People will always talk behind your back, even if you're completely innocent. I don't think people just generally being shitty has anything to do with respect. I grew up and now I'm a well respected woman at my job. Sleeping with people has never lost me respect in social groups. This is definitely something that comes from this board. The whole "girls need to be pure uwu" shit.
Sorry but people are always going to be shitty one way or another. That is a fact of life. You can be a pure innocent virgin and people will still talk shit about you. I seriously don't think it has anything to do with "respect".

[Anonymous No.10040555]

>>10040332
I think we come from different communities anon. That, and I don't think high school is representative of adult life. I'm pretty sure I'd lose respect in my social groups if I slept around.

>My dad molested me
I'm really sorry that happened anon. More than that though, I'm sorry that by you even saying this, my first instinct is to dismiss you as "oh, that explains it". It takes a real conscious effort to call myself out on that bullshit. And the only reason I'm saying it aloud is because I'm sure other people are thinking it too.

The whole idea that all your judgement and reasoning are tainted by a traumatic event is really stupid. But nobody ever says out loud that is what they're doing, so it never gets addressed.

The point you were making is perfectly valid. In your genuine experience, your actions had no effect on what people said, so why bother caring what they say? I'm glad you found a community that respects you and your lifestyle.

[Anonymous No.10040585]

>>10040555
Trips!!

Damn anon. That's really nice of you. I don't need the apology though because even though it was rough as hell, I learned a lot about people. I'm very over it now because like I said - it didn't hold me back. I guess it made me more skeptical and now I have really strong opinions about pedophiles but eh, nothing that halted my life to the point of not being able to function. Which actually does happen to people.

I've gone through a bit of therapy too and was never told that I was hypersexual because I was molested either. In fact I was told it was normal to sleep around in your early 20s and most women I've met did exactly that in their early 20s.

I hope you find a place where people won't judge you for normal behavior, anon.

[Anonymous No.10040628]

Sluts lol this whole board nothing but worthless thots the only thing women are good at holding is cum in there holes

[Anonymous No.10040639]

I wish all sluts could just get their clits cut off or something. All your doing is giving unworthy men the privlege of sex.

[Anonymous No.10040641]

No, really, sluts like you weaken the human race. Why bother to better yourself when there's plenty of dumb, emotionally unstable, battered and easily manipulated girls turning 18 every day?

[Anonymous No.10040642]

>>10039306
How do you know they arent laughing about what a dumb slut you are behind your back? They probably are and they arent wrong. Fuckboys are perceptive like that.

[Anonymous No.10040646]

>>10040555
It is common for people who have been molested at an young age to be uninhibited and have lots of sex, though (source: a psychiatrist I know). Not saying it is okay to automatically assume someone who was molested is like this. Not saying the majority of molested people are like this either. Just sharing my two cents. Don't feel bad about thinking that.

[Anonymous No.10040647]

>>10040585
>In fact I was told it was normal to sleep around in your early 20s and most women I've met did exactly that in their early 20s.
Depends on the culture desu. In Japan for example, it's the opposite. Even in the U.S. it wasn't common until recently.

[Anonymous No.10040662]

>>10040639
>>10040641
That is some weak ass bait

[Anonymous No.10040665]

>>10040646
Its also common for people who've been molested to go the complete opposite and become celibate. Regardless of what they choose, its kinda stupid and shitty for society to completely disregard their decisions as just "they're broken now". That stigma can be really damaging, and I should feel bad about perpetuating it. Which is why I called myself out on it.

>>10040641
This is mean. But I am sympathetic to it a little. Its basically impossible to find a guy who is willing to wait more than a month to have sex. Because there are an abundance of people willing to have sex, it means you have to decide before you're ready or comfortable whether to break up or just sleep with him. And maybe the first 6 or 7 times you do just break up. But eventually, you just want something to work so you give in even though you weren't comfortable with it and its just really awful.

And none of this is sex-positive anon's problem. Its like you want more episodes of Firefly but everyone likes Transformers instead so they make Transformers and you just sit at home and cry and eventually you see Transformers and it was exactly as awful as you thought it would be. I just want different things, but there aren't enough of me and too many of sex-pos anon, so I'm shit out of luck.