/cgl/ - Cosplay & EGL

Let's get started with a survey!
>when's your next meet up?
>how long has it been since your last meet?
>what's your average turn out?
>does your comm do any larger events like OTTea Party?
>have you ever hosted a meet? Would you be interested in hosting one in the future?
>Do you feel like you fit in with your comm?
>what's one thing you like about your comm?
>what's one thing you would change about your comm?
>what's your dream meet up?

>when's your next meet up?
This Wednesday
>how long has it been since your last meet?
Two weeks Ago
>what's your average turn out?
10-15
>does your comm do any larger events like OTTea Party?
Yea, only at cons.
>have you ever hosted a meet? Would you be interested in hosting one in the future?
I haven't at all and I couldn't, too nervous; I'd leave it to the ones that know what they are doing.
>Do you feel like you fit in with your comm?
Yea
>what's one thing you like about your comm?
Drama-free and personal
>what's one thing you would change about your comm?
To have a few meetups that are not prone to one city/area (I'm a loner)
>what's your dream meet up?
I don't know per say, I appreciate all the meetups that I'm able to attend and they run/host

>>9189211
>>when's your next meet up?
the 24th
>>how long has it been since your last meet?
personally, 10 months. comm wise, about a week and a half
>>what's your average turn out?
5-10
>>does your comm do any larger events like OTTea Party?
yes, usually for ILD
>>have you ever hosted a meet? Would you be interested in hosting one in the future?
yes, and I'm thinking of planning another soon
>>Do you feel like you fit in with your comm?
not really since I'm not a local
>>what's one thing you like about your comm?
large enough to do lots of meets, but still small enough that it feels kinda close
>>what's one thing you would change about your comm?
the fact that we can only ever have meets in the city since almost everyone whines about travel
>>what's your dream meet up?
a mega meet between my 2 closest comms that happens in my city since it's about an hour from both.

>>9189211
>>when's your next meet up?
The 30th
>>how long has it been since your last meet?
about 2 months
>>what's your average turn out?
no idea, I recently switched comms and the turnout to their stuff seems... not so good
>>does your comm do any larger events like OTTea Party?
I assume so
>>have you ever hosted a meet? Would you be interested in hosting one in the future?
I have hosted a meet, it went really well :) I would definitely do one again
>>Do you feel like you fit in with your comm?
Ive never met my new comm, but I felt pretty comfy at my old one
>>what's one thing you like about your comm?
old comm was very accepting
>>what's one thing you would change about your comm?
dont know
>>what's your dream meet up?
dont have one really, I love seeing what new things people host.

I think some of the links and names of comms have changed in the google doc since the hello lace purge.

> when's your next meet up?
I think there's meets being planned but none set in stone for now.
> how long has it been since your last meet?
One week
> what's your average turn out?
10 for casual meets, upwards of 20 for tea parties.
> does your comm do any larger events like OTTea Party?
Minimum twice a year
> have you ever hosted a meet? Would you be interested in hosting one in the future?
I have not. I would just be worried about the logistics and turn out.
> Do you feel like you fit in with your comm?
Yes. It's very welcoming.
> what's one thing you like about your comm?
The weekly discussions.
> what's one thing you would change about your comm?
Less cliquey.
> what's your dream meet up?
I have so many ideas but no definitive dream meet up yet.

>when's your next meet up?
Next Sunday! Tea-tasting and spoopy movie night.
>how long has it been since your last meet?
Had one today. A meet-planning meet!
>what's your average turn out?
About 5 girls at smaller events, 20-ish at larger ones like ILD and Christmas.
>does your comm do any larger events like OTTea Party?
See above.
>have you ever hosted a meet? Would you be interested in hosting one in the future?
Haven't hosted one yet, but hope to in October.
>Do you feel like you fit in with your comm?
Slowly, but surely.
>what's one thing you like about your comm?
Everyone is friendly.
>what's one thing you would change about your comm?
Not sure.
>what's your dream meet up?
I'm planning a meet-up where we rent out a space and watch The Grand Budapest Hotel and enjoy some Courtesan Au Chocolats catered by them since they have pastry chefs. I'll be making little Boy With Apple portrait brooches for everyone who attends, too.

>>9189207
Is it average for more than half of a comm to be made up of age 30+ women that try to hand make everything? I thought most were a mix of 20 somethings that buy their shit and younger newbies. Not saying one is worse than the other, just wondering.

>>9189863

Your situation doesn't sound normal at all, bro.

>>9189724
I want to be in your comm!

>>9189863
No that doesn't sound normal at all.
I'm 32 and mainly buys brand, indie and taobao brands, everyone else I know over 30 does too.
I'd love to learn to sew and make a few pieces but honestly I care more for brand.
Are they all poorfag or something?

>>9190129
Same. 34. I buy brand and a bit of indie. I handmake accessories and headpieces for myself sometimes. I'd like to try my hand at designing and sewing something at some point.

Most of my comm is 20-something. Most are college aged and new. Since I've been around, the older members have been moving on because of life. We have some younger, but they're doing pretty well and have nice coordinates.

>>9189863
Definitely out of the norm. There are very few 30+ people in my comm and those we do have, have a nice income and prefer to buy brand. There are a few of us 20somethings who like to sew but it's mostly for fun and in addition to buying stuff, not because we can't afford or fit anything else. Are a lot of your comm members overweight?

>>9189863
I feel like my comm has a good amount of both. It's a fairly large comm, but most girls are pretty old whether they buy or diy. Handmaking stuff isn't all that cheap when it comes to lolita so everyone is on the same page for having a job that let's you into this hobby however you approach it.

>>9190129
>>9190191
>poorfag?
Yep.
>overweight?
A good portion of them are, but not everyone from the camp I mentioned.

>when's your next meet up?
Next month
>how long has it been since your last meet?
1 day
>what's your average turn out?
4
>does your comm do any larger events like OTTea Party?
Lol no
>have you ever hosted a meet? Would you be interested in hosting one in the future?
Lately I host all the meets
>Do you feel like you fit in with your comm?
Sure
>what's one thing you like about your comm?
I've made a few friends
>what's one thing you would change about your comm?
It'd be nice if people would show the fuck up
>what's your dream meet up?
One where people show up like they say they will

I'm becoming so discouraged with my comm.

>>9189863
if your comm is also obese and bring children to meets, we have the same comm

>when's your next meet up?
Next Saturday
>how long has it been since your last meet?
Last Sunday
>what's your average turn out?
I want to say 10 or more
>does your comm do any larger events like OTTea Party?
My comm made OTTea
>have you ever hosted a meet?
Yes, a very small casual meet
Would you be interested in hosting one in the future?
Of course. Maybe co-host because planning and cat herding is a bit stressful for me.
>Do you feel like you fit in with your comm?
Well enough. I've made many new friends and frequently hang out with members outside of official meets
>what's one thing you like about your comm?
A majority of the comm is really friendly and welcoming. It helps that we have two brand stores in the city.
>what's one thing you would change about your comm?
Not much, I wish it was easier to make friends with people who already have their sort of "clique" and the Bay Area is so huge I can go several months without seeing someone at the same meet.
>what's your dream meet up?
desu I wish I lived in a nice enough house or in a complex that had a community area so I could just have loads of people over to have tea, play games, and watch lolita aesthetic movies.
But ALSO OTTea is my dream meet since I couldn't make it last year. I am really excited.

>when's your next meet up?
The 24th techinically.
>how long has it been since your last meet?
I think there was one a couple of weeks ago but not entirely sure because it was a solid 5 hour drive from me.
>what's your average turn out?
It varies. Larger events can get around 20-30 people but I'd say most meets get like 5.
>does your comm do any larger events like OTTea Party?
We try but this doesn't happen often especially since we rarely seem to have normal meet ups.
>have you ever hosted a meet?
Would you be interested in hosting one in the future?
I'm hosting one for the first time in a little bit.
>Do you feel like you fit in with your comm?
Not really. I don't know anyone that well because a lot of people are pretty distant. I still have yet to find someone I really click with.
>what's one thing you like about your comm?
There's appreciation for a lot of j-fashions, not just lolita.
>what's one thing you would change about your comm?
Make it less spread out. We're spread over a very big regional zone. Like I said, the last meet was 5 hours one way from me and I just don't have time for that every month. It would also help with the frequency and turn out of meets.
>what's your dream meet up?
Art gallery hopping meet or something at one of the nicer restaurants around here. The bar is pretty low because we don't have a lot.

>>9189880
Move to the Texas of Canada. We're also going to see the ballet production of Dracula.

Thank you OP for sharing this spreadsheet!

>>9190275
At least a fourth are overweight and it seems some members involve their children/husbands etc. more often than they should. This is probably just an unfortunate coincidence between our comms, though.

I was really excited about a meet up but now all the itas and their babies coming up and the girls I know are now maybes...

One of the comms in my state is so extra. They have 30 members in their FB group (it's a small town), yet you have to answer a 9 question survey with some questions having multiple parts to join the group. And you have to answer any followup questions from mods, and you have to post an introduction shortly after being accepted... Is all this fucking fuss necessary?

What does your comm do to vet who joins?

>>9190224
Idaho really does need to do something about our abysmal attendance. As much as I enjoy the small meets, I'd love to be able to do something that requires an RSVP.

>>9190819
Sounds like a good way to filter cosplayers and sissies.

Do any of your comm members bring a plushie to every meet up? We have someone who takes it out for every group meet up photo. I feel like it gives our comm more of the age player drag rep it already has in our city
>occasionally others hold it and it's getting on the dirty side. Can't say shit but really disgusted whenever I see it's dirty face

>when's your next meet up?
5 weeks from now
>how long has it been since your last meet?
More than a month ago
>what's your average turn out?
Around 20 people
>does your comm do any larger events like OTTea Party?
I've never heard of OTTea Party, it doesn't sound like it'd be popular with my comm
>have you ever hosted a meet? Would you be interested in hosting one in the future?
I want to host a meet but I dont have any friends in the comm and I'm scared no one will show up
>Do you feel like you fit in with your comm?
No
>what's one thing you like about your comm?
Everyone I've met so far is friendly and pretty normal
>what's one thing you would change about your comm?
Cosplay wigs are really popular, I want to burn them.
>what's your dream meet up?
Alice in wonderland themed tea party in someone's garden

>>9190897
plushies have been around in lolita since forever ago. I really don't get people who are so worried about looking more age playerish, you already look ridiculous to normies anyway, especially at meet-ups

>>9190897
Maybe bring it up and ask what brand it is, how much it holds, and why she's using a second purse and what happened to the straps. Implying you thought it was an Usakumya or something. Look a bit disgusted when she says its just a stuffed animal.

>>9190910
It's clearly a stuffed animal. I didnt want to be too specific but it's been happening for more than a year and it would be weird to say something after this long. She's also friends with our mods and in the main circle.
I know Sanrio makes bags but this one clearly isn't because it started when Sanrio tried their hand at the dressable plushies.

>when's your next meet up?
this weekend
>how long has it been since your last meet?
about 2 weeks.
>what's your average turn out?
around 10 - 20 people
>does your comm do any larger events like OTTea Party?
yes
>have you ever hosted a meet? Would you be interested in hosting one in the future?
yup and yes
>Do you feel like you fit in with your comm?
for the most part, yes
>what's one thing you like about your comm?
everyone is so welcoming and it's pretty drama free and we're lacking in itas.
>what's one thing you would change about your comm?
can't think of anything at the moment
>what's your dream meet up?
like some sort of Lolita ball.

>>9190897
Oh god I hate that shit. Unless it's a brand bag don't bring your fucking 'stuffie' to meets. It's so embarrassing.

>when's your next meet up?
This upcoming weekend but I won't be able to attend
>how long has it been since your last meet?
Just a week
>what's your average turn out?
All the meets I've been to have had about 5-10ish people?
>does your comm do any larger events like OTTea Party?
Not that I've seen, but haven't been here very long.
>have you ever hosted a meet? Would you be interested in hosting one in the future?
I haven't, but I would really like to. I love party/event planning.
>Do you feel like you fit in with your comm?
Yes!!! I got along with everyone so quickly and easily, which doesn't usually happen for me.
>what's one thing you like about your comm?
No one is stuck up
>what's one thing you would change about your comm?
Less talk about korean crap lol. Maybe I'm the stuck up one...
>what's your dream meet up?
I'm trash and would love to just hang and get drunk at a dive bar with my frilly friends. Or maybe wine tasting if I want to be more classy about it.

>when's your next meet up?
Not scheduled yet, but it'll be in October going to a haunted house
>how long has it been since your last meet?
Last weekend
>what's your average turn out?
10-12
>does your comm do any larger events like OTTea Party?
Not at all, our largest tea parties are around 20 people
>have you ever hosted a meet? Would you be interested in hosting one in the future?
I frequently host meets. My new goal is to host a mega meet with a few other small comms within a reasonable distance (3 hours of the location)
>Do you feel like you fit in with your comm?
Kind of, there are different factions. I fit in well with the regulars who are really into lolita. Not so much with the younger girls who are big into cosplay, or the normalfags who try to handmake stuff and don't respond well to concrit
>what's one thing you like about your comm?
Lots of diverse styles
>what's one thing you would change about your comm?
I wish there were fewer cosplayers and convention-only lolitas
>what's your dream meet up?
I hate to sound like a weeb, but my favorite meetups are just going out for sushi and then watching anime at someone's house. The ones I host are much fancier and it's tiring going out for tea or to a gallery and being on my best behavior and taking tons of photos

im relatively new to lolita and im really scared to join my local comm
i follow a few of them on instagram/youtube since they're kinda popular and i met a girl who was vlogging a while ago (we were on the same train), so now it just feels a little stalkerish? but im not a fucking weirdo or anything ive just seen them around on the interwebs and irl a few times

>>9190903
>Alice in wonderland themed tea party in someone's garden
Can someone explain the $10 admission for a meet at someone's house? It's $5 even if you bring food and supplies yourself. Someone with past experiences with the host's events please tell me that it's worth it and I'm just being a dick about the price.

>when's your next meet up?
october
>how long has it been since your last meet?
i don't know, the comm is dead, and it was just now that i finally got the courage to join.
>does your comm do any larger events like OTTea Party?
no, i'm probably going to plan it, though.
>have you ever hosted a meet? Would you be interested in hosting one in the future?
no. i've hosted meets for plenty of other groups, and am currently planning one for my comm since everyone waffles on planning and hosting meets.
>Do you feel like you fit in with your comm?
definitely not. we don't click interest-wise or style-wise, i think; they seem friendly enough, though.
>what's one thing you like about your comm?
it's small, so it's easier to root out drama.
>what's one thing you would change about your comm?
the fact that they're mostly ita or dumb as rocks.
>what's your dream meet up?
punking out at a show desu but that's not happening, haha!

>>9191126
Its probably to cover food and supplies, then a little extra for them hosting at their house (rather than paying more to rent a place) and to cover any accidentals?

>>9191126
Ugh I hate that, someone in my comm does meets like that, and charges $15 for it. When 25 people show up, that's a ton of money for maybe $30 total worth of shitty flavored tea and homemade sweets.

>when's your next meet up?
The 22nd for National Ice Cream Cone Day
>how long has it been since your last meet?
Last month
>what's your average turn out?
4 to 8 who show up in Lolita proper.
>does your comm do any larger events like OTTea Party?
We sometimes host tea parties at the parlor of a historic building but it has a cap of 15 people. But we do try for holidays.
>have you ever hosted a meet? Would you be interested in hosting one in the future?
Countless. I'm a mod and some months there just isn't very much initiative, but I do love coming up with meet ideas and look forward to more to come in the future.
>Do you feel like you fit in with your comm?
Oh yes they are lovely people though lulls in conversation make me anxious and in wanting to keep it rolling,I worry I come across as erratic or commandeering.
>what's one thing you like about your comm?
That we get along.
>what's one thing you would change about your comm?
That more people would properly commit to an RSVP.
>what's your dream meet up?
One with so so many people as if we were a sea of frills, going about downtown boutiquing and antiquing.

>>9190980
>hang and get drunk at a dive bar with my frilly friends
My comm is having a meet at a vintage themed bar where they serve the alcohol in teacups. Maybe you have something like that locally? Or make a tipsy tea party yourself!

>>9191040
Go for it anon!
The longer this lets on the harder it will be. They're just people with common interests. Ask them about their next video or their creative process etc. Good luck!

Can you do anything if a member won't stop bringing their significant other? They're so annoying!

>>9191371
You must sneak your way into their home and fake evidence of cheating.

>>9191371
Stop being such a little bitch and say it to their face maybe??

Let's get started with a survey!
>when's your next meet up?
No idea, my comm rarely has meetups unless it's ILD...
>how long has it been since your last meet?
Little over 3 months (June ILD)
>what's your average turn out?
5-6 ish?
>does your comm do any larger events like OTTea Party?
Nope, just hang out at small cafe's or walk around in the heat/humidity trying to find somewhere to take selfies/outfit shots
>have you ever hosted a meet? Would you be interested in hosting one in the future?
No, not with my current comm.
>Do you feel like you fit in with your comm?
Not at all, I'm one of the oldest members in our tiny community (25 y/o) that's run by a bunch of high school kids. But they're nice, so I guess it's okay.
>what's one thing you like about your comm?
They're nice and fun to hang out with whenever we actually do have a meetup.
>what's one thing you would change about your comm?
Just more meetups or something, we only have meetups maybe once to three times a year.
>what's your dream meet up?
High tea in a fancy restaurant setting with lots of lolitas around my age to talk to... I feel like I'm a lone lolita right now.

>>9189207
>when's your next meet up?
A small one this weekend.
>how long has it been since your last meet?
Two weeks.
>what's your average turn out?
Average? 10ish. Bigger tea parties/ILD can hit 30+. Our December tea party regularly sells out within hours.
>does your comm do any larger events like OTTea Party?
For ILD, and usually a big picnic in summer.
>have you ever hosted a meet? Would you be interested in hosting one in the future?
No. And kind of.
>Do you feel like you fit in with your comm?
We're quite diverse in age, ethnicity, and income. So yeah.
>what's one thing you like about your comm?
The above, and the core group is very chill.
>what's one thing you would change about your comm?
I can't really think of anything of the top of my head, I feel unironically #blessed.
>what's your dream meet up?
I'd like to do some historical stuff!

>>9191371
You could get over being jealous and single. Though perhaps that's too difficult. Must suck to be you.

>>9191371
I don't usually mind when someone brings their SO but it can get annoying sometimes. There's one girl in my comm who always brings her fat manchild to every single meetup and it's really starting to get on my nerves. He has no interest in the fashion and if there aren't any other boyfriends for him to interact with, he will just sit around playing on his DS and whining to his girlfriend that he's bored and wants to go home. Then fuck off and go, dude! It's not like she needs him to drive, they always arrive on public transport.

>>9191378
kek

>>9191407
This isn't necessarily it, though. I'm happily married and it still annoys me to see people drag their SO to meets for no reason. One time we had a boyfriend who actually sat around calling us weird and making fun of us to our faces while his girlfriend was off talking to her friends and ignoring her asshole boyfriend. Why was he there? Why even bring him if he thinks lolita is 'retarded'?

>>when's your next meet up?
Late October
>>how long has it been since your last meet?
About 2 weeks
>>what's your average turn out?
About 5 people
>>does your comm do any larger events like OTTea Party?
Barely ever, because of the poor turn out. When we do, we get about 10 people tops
>>have you ever hosted a meet? Would you be interested in hosting one in the future?
I host most of my comms meetings. It feels disappointing the least to say.
>>Do you feel like you fit in with your comm?
Yep, I am the queen bee (but the queen bee among mostly itas hardly ever means anything)
>>what's one thing you like about your comm?
I've met a couple of interesting people.
>>what's one thing you would change about your comm?
I'd like twice as much people, or at least twice as dedicated people.
>>what's your dream meet up?
Fancy tea party at some nice venue. Will never happen because everyone is a disorganized poorfag or an ita

Yes I am super salty

I have some more survey questions!

>How long have you been with your current comm?
>Do you do things with any lolitas from your comm outside of meets?
>Have you ever considered becoming/been a lone lolita? Why/why not?

>>9191597
>How long have you been with your current comm?
2 years
>Do you do things with any lolitas from your comm outside of meets?
No, I'm too much of a shut in and everyone's busy.
>Have you ever considered becoming/been a lone lolita? Why/why not?
I'm pretty much a lone lolita because my comm never has any meets.

>>9191407
I don't mind one or two people bringing their SO along occasionally, especially if the person is fun to talk to. But nearly half of my active comm brings their boyfriends/husbands to a meetup every chance they get. They don't all care about the fashion, so what are they here for? Support? Do you need moral support for every meet you go to? Call me crazy, but I don't think they really wanted to come.

>>9191613
I honestly don't get bringing your SO to a meet unless they are interested enough that they would have considered going by themselves? They have no business being there, otherwise and I can't imagine them having fun. Like, maybe if it's your first meet and you're anxious about it, but every meet? Nah, bro.

>>9190819
>>9190885

I just moved and joined a local comm who does a similar long survey (the comm itself is a lot larger though). I thought it was a nice idea, and they were the type of questions that would be really easy for actual lolitas/newbies who actually know the fashion but difficult for creeps and randos

>>9191371
I'm curious if this is normally a problem, because my wife is into Lolita fashion and I would like to go to a meet with her. I can see why it could create awkwardness and upset the harmony of a community, but she's pretty shy around new people and wants me to come along.

>>9191481
I would not be act like this at all though. I love Lolita fashion, and know the brands and prints. I understand color coordinates and substyles fairly well. I don't bring my phone to social meetups and activities where it's considered rude. I'm not interested in flirting with other girls but have no issues with conversation and genuine compliments.

I like the look of ouji, but I don't think I could pull it off honestly. I really want to be there for her when she goes but I don't want to make the other girls have a bad impression because she brought me along. I don't think I could pull off anything oTT but I was thinking about dressing nice in fitted slacks, dress shirt, and vest with a pocket watch, cravat and cuff links for a bit of flair. I think it would be cute to compliment her coord as well.

Would this be acceptable? Could I even expect a warm welcome? Or would it still be awkward?

>>9191613
Why not organize a meet-up yourself that requires EVERYONE who attends to wear lolita.

>>9191645
My husband occasionally attends meetups, and is basically what you're describing--he doesn't come to meetups he's uninterested in, wears nice clothes but not J-fashion, and has a good basic knowledge of the fashion and brands.

As long as you are engaged, interested, and socially aware, most comms don't have a problem. It's the guys that don't put in any effort or act like it's a chore to tag along that most people dislike.

>>9191645
Your personality is more relevant than what you wear. Just treat it like a regular gathering, be friendly and act normally. There may be points in the conversation when you can't follow because you will not be aware of a lolita current event. This can make a lot of brodudes uncomfortable because they have to be Master of All Situations. If you're interested in a topic you don't know much about, ask questions and get involved. If you're not interested just wait for the topic to change. If you have normal social skills this shouldn't be a problem.

>>9191645
you seem like you would be fine and not get on anyone's nerves. depending on your wife's style you could check out something like EGA (elegant gothic aristocrat) to wear along with your wife. it might look a bit odd with sweet, but can coord nicely with classic & goth

>>9191652
>>9191680
Thank you both for the replies. It helps to know what to expect.
I'm sure it will be fine no matter what, I'm one of those people that loves socializing with all walks of life and really enjoy when people are passionate about hobbies. I will be engaged and curious about any conversations. But at the same time I don't want to make any girls feel less inclined to act and speak unrestrained, in an effort to be sensitive to my presence.

Im more excited to go to a meet up than worried, If it seems like I'm over-analyzing, it's only because I care enough to research how to make the experience the best for everyone involved. Especially my girl. So thank you again for any opinions or stories.

>>9191652
>>9191704
2nding
My boyfriend is good friends with many members of my comm, he does not wear jfashion at all but he is friendly and thinks the subculture is really interesting. He likes hearing about brands and drama.
Every once in awhile I will notice girls being restrained saying something around him, but that's rare, and if its girl chat time someone will say something but thats not common either

>>9191697
She mainly wears classic, in darker colors. Deep reds and blacks. So EGA could work with couple coords.

Don't get me wrong I love EGA, but m main problem is have pretty average measurements (5'9" 160lbs) and I think a lot of the fashion looks so much better on tall slender guys.
I'm okay with my body, but I gotta dress for it. Definitely will steal some inspo from EGA though. Thank you.

>>9191713
Oh, that's really cool to hear that. I would hope to at least be acquainted well with the comm so I'm not the tag along. It's nice to know good comms accept that.

We would have to travel to the nearest big city for a meetup, as noone else in this area is into any form of j-fashion so that's one of the main reasons I would need to at least go with her to the city. But if she gets comfortable enough to go by herself, that's fine too, because I can kill hours at a skatepark or arcade.

>>9190357
I would recommend against this entirely. Alberta has shit comms.

>>9191806
I'm liking it more than the comm in B.C. I was a part of, but other than that, no real basis of comparison. No moms bringing kids which would be my only real peeve that a lot of other comms seem to struggle with.

On the topic of boyfriends at meetups, I've been thinking my bf would get on really well with another lolita's bf but can't figure out a way to get them to meet, since mine is shy about coming to meetups and hers doesn't attend regularly either. I know trying to set up a play date for your SO is weird as hell but they have a lot of interests in common and seem like they'd get along swimmingly. My boyfriend has grown apart from his (male) friends since he started his job and I sometimes worry about him being lonely. The idea of helping him make a friend through lolita sounds so nice...

>Join new comm and interact with some of the members. They're nice, and I'm pretty happy.
>Message from one of them "Oh anon there's a group much closer to you!"
>Check out other group's page and the cover pic is ita as shit.
>MFW

>tfw you want to attend your first meetup
>Tfw local rarely does anything
Would it be worth driving 3 hours to go to a DC meetup? I hear they're pretty active

>>9191865
Both of you coordinate on a meetup to bring them too and just tell them "So and so is bringing their boyfriend, I think you guys would get along!"

>>9189724
I'm laughing at the current event attendance and crying that I won't be around to attend myself.

Do you notice that your comm has a problem with people who habitually list themselves as a maybe and never show up to anything?
The other Alberta comm has at least three people who do this and I feel like I should post about it but I'm not sure what to say.

>>9191040
It's not creepy at all. No one would assume you're following them around if you join the local comm unless they're a huge narcissist.

>>9192081
In our meet-planning meet Saturday, we actually talked about that and want to update the rules so that maybes aren't allowed, and won't count as a yes. It's especially an issue for events that require reservations.
In any case, no one's really gotten back to me on the whole Dracula ballet thing, and the available seats are dwindling. I'm not sure if it's because people are hesitant about the ticket price or just don't want to attend with me, lol. I'll make some sort of update tonight. Also, it's going to be at the northern Jubilee auditorium too, so maybe the other comm will get to enjoy it.

Does Maine not have a community anymore?

>when's your next meet up?
This weekend at the Expo
>how long has it been since your last meet?
A day
>what's your average turn out?
About 8-10
>does your comm do any larger events like OTTea Party?
High tea semi-annually
>have you ever hosted a meet? Would you be interested in hosting one in the future?
I hosted yesterday's, and I host a good amount of casual cafe meets
>Do you feel like you fit in with your comm?
I feel well-liked, and I'm living with another girl from the comm, so I'd say so
>what's one thing you like about your comm?
We meet very frequently
>what's one thing you would change about your comm?
Fewer chronic 'maybes' - People who list themselves as a maybe for everything and never change status or show up
>what's your dream meet up?
I adore scavenger hunts, a well-organized scavenger hunt downtown after tea would be divine

>>9192090
Ahhh I already reserved tickets for the operas, but I might be able to get the girls to go to Dracula too haha.
Do you know if anyone else is going to the LoZ orchestra in your comm this week??

>>9191865
Maybe try hanging out outside of lolita if neither guy is that interested in the fashion.
A casual coffee/boardgame hang out would be an easy way to get the ball rolling.

>>9192103
Not that I know of. Tickets are probably long gone too. Would've loved that. But there's a Disney one in November that I'm sure we could girls excited for.

>>9189207
>when's your next meet up?
A casual lunch meet-up, but the next "big" one is a Halloween meet at an apple picking orchard.
>how long has it been since your last meet?
Just a couple weeks, we had one earlier this month.
>what's your average turn out?
I would say about 10-15.
>does your comm do any larger events like OTTea Party?
Our comm is regularly active, and we have a fuckton of people in the FB group, but I don't think we have enough regular attendees to have a big event like that. The biggest events we have are our ILD events, and those tend to bring out the most people anyways.
>have you ever hosted a meet? Would you be interested in hosting one in the future?
I've hosted a handful. I enjoy helping my comm stay active, but it can be a bit stressful sometimes. Even something as simple as just making reservations for lunch or dinner can get annoying if people don't tell you if they're coming or not. However, my comm is pretty decent with that for the most part, so it's not too bad. I think the key to hosting meets is just being able to know when to put your foot down and knowing how to take control. I find most people are looking for the host to just take charge (which is what you should do IMO) so don't host meets if you feel like you can't handle the responsibility/being an active or dominant voice.
>Do you feel like you fit in with your comm?
Def. There's some people I'm closer to than others of course, but for the most part I've made acquaintances with maybe 30 people and am good friends with like, 10, then my smaller core group.
>what's one thing you like about your comm?
Everyone is chill and drama free and we all want to keep it that way.
>what's one thing you would change about your comm?
Maybe wish we had a few more people, but I think our "low" numbers is what helps keep drama out so maybe not.
>what's your dream meet up?
I would love to go somewhere nice like on the coast or to an island and stay in a cute inn and just do fun stuff.

Any word on St. L Missouri comm?
My family lives about an hour away and I plan to visit them soon I just don't have dates yet. Should I wait until I have dates before requesting to join and is the comm active? My current comm took 2 months to respond to me to let me in. It's obvious I'm a Lolita by my Facebook but my location isn't.

>>9191407
Yeah I'm also married and get really tired of the same 2 girls bringing their SO to meets I organize, like put on your big girl panties and leave him at home for 2 hours. Be brave. It grosses me out seeing girls who are that insecure and clingy.

>>9191648
because then you get this scenario

>weh girl brings her bf AGAIN
>dresses him in the shittiest outfit imaginable
>"oh we coordinated to match!!"
>mfw
>sticking a mini top hat and pastel high water jeans on your bf is not coording together

>>9191613
I don't understand why girls do this. I love my boyfriend and I love being around him but I know he has zero interest in lolita. He'd be bored to tears at a meet up unless it was something that'd he'd enjoy.

So if it's something like you're going to see a play or movie and your s/o wants to come along I usually don't mind but if your s/o is just going to come along and play their 3DS awkwardly then perhaps it's best that they stay home.

Chanel keeps stinking up the SoCal comms with her Queen Mary meet and nobody's responding except for a couple clueless itas. Go away.

>>9190897
My comm just introduced a new rule, that no plushies, BJDs or toys are to be taken out to meets. If a member does so they will be asked to put it away or leave. It's a pretty small comm so it should be easy to see who adheres to the rules.
Obviously usakumyas and bags are allowed, but just not actual toys.

>>9193642
This. There's s difference between your SO wanting to go along to meets and enjoys himself and you not being able to go out on your own and dragging them along.

>>9194169
Excellent idea. Adults carrying plush toys around is plain old creepy.

>How long have you been with your current comm?
1 year

>Do you do things with any lolitas from your comm outside of meets?
Yes

>Have you ever considered becoming/been a lone lolita? Why/why not?
I have been a lone lolita in the past.

>>9189211
>when's your next meet up?
About a week away.

>how long has it been since your last meet?
Over a month.

>what's your average turn out?
Anywhere between 3 and 12 outside of ILDs, I feel like it's usually about 7 people.

>does your comm do any larger events like OTTea Party?
No, my country's national comm does but we just do smaller events for the two ILDs.

>have you ever hosted a meet? Would you be interested in hosting one in the future?
I've hosted mini-meets, I'd like to host a larger meet as there aren't that many meetups in this comm and I know one of the main girls that hosts has got busier now.

>Do you feel like you fit in with your comm?
Not as well as with my last comm. I can make polite small talk but it's a mixture of girls I can chat to on a casual level or even have stuff in common with but don't really gel with, and girls who actually slightly annoy me. I still come to meets for the social occasion but spending so much on food and travel feels like a waste sometimes.

>what's one thing you like about your comm?
We have some nice locations for meets here.

>what's one thing you would change about your comm?
More frequent meets and a different mod team.

>what's your dream meet up?
Don't know.

>>9192095
Added the Maine comm to the list? (they must've gotten deleted in the hellolace purge) I hope that's them, but either way, the comm must be super small (I have a feeling that a majority travel to Boston for bigger meetups).

>when's your next meet up?
Nothing planned
>how long has it been since your last meet?
6 weeks
>what's your average turn out?
3-6 people with the occasional boyfriend
>does your comm do any larger events like OTTea Party?
No never enough interest
>have you ever hosted a meet? Would you be interested in hosting one in the future?
Yes to both
>Do you feel like you fit in with your comm?
Not really but I don't mind.
>what's one thing you like about your comm?
There is a small group of dedicated girls who attend meetups and are drama free
>what's one thing you would change about your comm?
More dedicated people and an overall improvement in quality of coords
>what's your dream meet up?
A themed tea with at least 10 people showing up

I just joined a comm in my area and it appears to be inactive. There were two meets in 2015, and the only meet this year was a New Year's meet back in January. There's another, much larger & more active comm about an hour and a half from where I live, but I'm not sure if I'd be able to be as active as I'd like because of the distance. I was thinking of trying to revive my local comm, starting with a Halloween meet, but I'm afraid of hosting a meet since I'm super new and know absolutely no one. Is it worth trying to host a meet and revive my local comm, or is a new girl hosting a meet just too weird?

>>9194698
Also, I've never been in a comm before, but I do have experience hosting non-lolita related meets.

>>9194698
>>9194704
If the other comm is much more active, chances are that any active lolitas still living in your area go to that one. I'd suggest going to a couple of meets of the other comm first to meet more people before proposing or organising a local meet in a dead comm - for all you know, the members in the FB group/whatever for your local comm could have all moved on,

>>9189211
>what's your dream meet up?
I'd love a meet with no itas and no bitching. I've been to maybe two meets ever where I felt like the entire comm looked fabulous and it felt amazing. It's nice walking around thinking that your whole group is slaying, rather than that one loud ita is making you look weird. A historical location like a stately home would be great, especially if it's a meet with people I don't know that well, but a smaller meet chilling and shopping in town with a group of girls I really get on with would be amazing too.

I really wish I could make some close friends in my comm so we could just hang out together. I moved out of area before I got that close to anyone in my last comm, and this new one is fairly dead and I don't have that much in common with most of the girls.

>>9194366
There was a time when big and adult and watching cartoons was unacceptable.
I wonder when the stupid toy shit will end.

>>9194851
Being an adult**

Moving to atlanta in a couple of months, what should i expect?

Just how bad of an idea would it be to try to promote membership to my local comm by plugging on local anime and cosplay groups? I'd imagine we'd get some looky loo weebs but I still feel its worth it if among them there turns out to be a diamond in the rough or a unawares lone Lolita.

>>9195028
How badly do you need new members? It doesn't sound worth it to me.

>>9194851
But for example, I know plenty of adults who have stuffed toys etc. It doesn't mean they'd walk around in public cuddling them.

>>9195028
If you want to be over run by itas and 'cosplay lolitas' then sure.

I have to stop going to meets for awhile because usually it's just going out to eat with large groups of people almost every meet. I have a blast every time I go to one and I've made a couple of friends but it costs so much and a lot of places just start adding up the gratuity costs because of such large groups.
So it's pretty much just going out to eat all the time but double the cost it'd usually be.

I have to save up $1500 by next year so winter is gonna be me hibernating at home and work for awhile. I feel like I've only started making friends with in my comm which is great but sucks because we're not really good friends yet and I'm not going to see them again, for quite some time.

Does anyone else feel like lolita is kind of a hobby where you pay for friends? That's what it feels like to me. Like oh if only I could just spend all my money on this, I'd be able to hang out with them all the time..

>>9195103
>It doesn't mean they'd walk around in public cuddling them.
This is exactly what I was talking about. There was a time when reading comic books meant you were a nerd. Now it pretty much makes you a normie.
People are starting to lose the whole "only children can do this" mentality and thank god, because I'm really sick of certain behaviors being called immature just because "that's what kids do". It's not like people are trying to get you to accept that they're picking their nose or not washing their hands after eating.

Get out of here with your made up rules that you only know of because you were taught them.

>>9195418
That's whyi like to plan meetups that don't cost as much! If you have any nice parks in your area you can always plan picnics or even arts and crafts meetups (where everyone brings their own supplies). hell, we've even had a Pokemon go meetup! despite living Lolita and putting serious bank into it, I'm actually really cheap. A good time with friends doesn't have to cost a lot, you just have to get creative!

>>9195443
My comm is huge. There's a meet up almost every weekend, not even exaggerating.
Also it rains A LOT. There are parks but picnic season is pretty much over where I live. It's also gonna start getting -1 C here outside. I live in a crazy weather place where most people want to be inside most of the time, hence going out to eat all the time. They also go to hotels, but usually to eat. (heh.)

Also most girls in my comm aren't comfortable with hanging out at each other's houses unless they've already been friends for years on end.

I've been a lonelita for a looong time but I've only known these people for like, 6 months ish? And only off and on as when I started going to meets, my schedule didn't exactly allow for me to go every weekend.

So yeah, I don't know. I wanted to plan a Kamikaze Girls meet up at a local theater, but that costs an arm and a leg so I can't do that until AFTER next year.

>>9195449
Ah dang. Sorry man. I don't live in a place with weather. Like. At all. So it's really easy to forget most places can't host picnics year round. We've also gone to quaint little cafes to do drawing meetups before, if that helps at all! Hopefully your movie meet goes well when you plan it!

I'm about to host my first meet up, and would it be weird if I go all Girl Scout? I mean, bring needle and thread, safety pins, bobby pins, blotting paper, ibuprofen, maybe some paper and markers to play Pictionary to break the ice, etc... I won't make everyone sing Princess Pat, I just want to be ready if someone needs help with their coord or anything.

>>9194169
>no BJDs
Why?

>>9195494
Because the whole "we're so afraid of being mistaken for ageplayers" mentality that's happening now. Dolls are only for children apparently.

I was thinking of hosting a meet in my hometown since another cafe opened up and I thought it would be kinda fun to have a cafe and antique store meetup where we just bounce around to all the different stores and cafes. The downtown area is so convenient to walk around and I think it would be a lot of fun, but last time I hosted a meet only one person rsvp'd and I felt really horrible about myself and had to cancel. Why does the cbus group in the Ohio comm never do anything ugh.

>>9195449
Ah, that sucks anon. I'm in a similar situation - we only have meets once a month, but with travel and food I always end up having to spend $30-50 minimum. Even a "free" meet will cost me about $15 in travel. Back when I was a poorfag highschooler I basically had to choose between going to meets and being able to buy lolita - nowadays I can do both, but the expense still irks me when it's not super nice food or super nice girls going. I know people say you can always just order a side or w/e but when I'm spending an hour and a half travelling each way and six hours on my feet at a meet, I need some proper food to keep me going.

It's hard to host more than one meet a month as well, because a lot of girls only budget for one meet a month. Even if you host something like a picnic in my comm, you'll get people saying they can't afford the travel costs because they've already paid for one meet that month.

>>9195490
This sounds like a good plan if you can fit it all in your bag. Don't forget band-aids for blisters as well, and tampons/pads in case that's relevant.

>>9195028
This is a terrible idea.

>>9195490
Not weird at all imo, it's always good to be prepared. Just don't overload yourself, remember you're there to have fun.

>>9195497
Aw. I'm sorry famalam. I love Columbus, Ohio. I'd visit more if I weren't 6 hr away (and who wants to drive through Indiana?). I envy your downtown and riverfront area, German Village is adorable, and I like that there are decent Japanese shops in spite of being in the Midwest. I wish my city was on that level, but shit goes downhill when they take manufacturing jobs away.

>>9195070
It's more that we don't have all that many members that actually attend meets. But yea you are probably right. I just needed to hear it from the outside.

>>9195497
That sounds like a nice idea. To be honest, with meets like that you cause less disruption to the cafes and stores if you're not in a group of more than six or so anyway, so it can be a really nice experience for getting to know people even if only like three girls come.

>>9191597
>How long have you been with your current comm?
A year but it feels like less because there aren't many events.
>Do you do things with any lolitas from your comm outside of meets?
I'm just starting to do this. We average less than one meet a month, and if I can't make that date or time I end up going ages without a chance to frill up. Plus I don't have much in common with 90% of the comm, so I'd like to hang out more with the couple of girls I do have stuff in common with.
>Have you ever considered becoming/been a lone lolita? Why/why not?
I was a lone lolita for a year when I first started buying lolita because I lived in a town without a comm and didn't know there was another comm one city over. I'm quite glad desu because it meant no evidence of me being ita ended up online.

For me to be a lone lolita again, I would have to be living in a city/area nice enough for me to wear lolita alone, maybe have some lolita friends to chat about the fashion with online. Right now I don't feel comfortable wearing lolita alone near my house, and lolita meets are one of my only social outlets.

>>9195497
Ohio lolita here! please host something in cbus!!! even though it's a hike, I love that city. (esp if it's at that tea room in the short north... I think that would be lovely for a meet up)

>>9192095
It looks like the main FB comm page got deleted, probably because of a hellolace link somewhere.
Most of our active members either moved away or left lolita over the past couple years - it's been a while since we've had any meetups.

>>9192541
Message an admin explaining your situation.

>>9195499
For me the issue is that I lose a day's wages whenever I go to meets, since I'm a student and work weekends. I can request a day off, but that means I'm covering the expense of a meetup and losing my Saturday pay. I still think a good meet is worth it but I get bitter over shitty meets and cancelled noshows.

>>9195499
Oh yeah, I have to deal with paying out the ass for travel because I drink at most meet ups and don't want to take public transit in lolita (though sometimes I will). So I usually take at least one uber every time there's a meet. That's like an extra $20.

>>9195544
>For me the issue is that I lose a day's wages whenever I go to meets
Same. I have a better schedule but I pretty much had to trade to have Saturdays off for getting paid slightly less.

>>9194613
If they do I've never seen them ever

>>9195500
Oh, band-aids are a good one. Thanks! (Side note: there's this stuff called moleskin which is supposed to be the best for blisters.)

>>9195501
I'll try not to rattle like the walking-pharmacy I'm prone to be and relax.

>>9194613
>>9195775
>>9195530
I just moved to the area from the Boston Comm actually.. I think we had a couple NH people come down occasionally but.. I'll just have to make the trek down to visit my favorite frillies for ILDs and such at least!

>>9195028
ugh someone in my comm does shit like this and a bunch of maid cafe itas joined
>please dont fucking do this. please.

>>9195792
We'd be happy to have you still!

>>9195495
I'm guessing it's more why would you want to bring a doll (a very expensive one) to meets that it has nothing to do with? Why do you want to bring a doll to a meet anyway? I really don't get it.

>>9195427
Are you suggesting it should be socially acceptable to walk around, like in a grocery store, headed to the bar, going to WORK with stuffed animals?
Look, I have a box of stuffed toys, I sleep with one under my pillow, when I was younger I had a tiny bear in my hoodie pocket constantly, but you can't change people's perceptions just because you want to.

I don't even know what country you're from, but there really are some things you should just keep to yourself and not throw into other's faces.

>>9196236
There used to be posts in cringe threads and stuff about people who would bring dolls to meets and demand they be treated like people and have their own seats and stuff.

>>9195495
One bad egg ruins it for the rest of you little girls.

>>9195494
>>9195495
Not >>9194169 but everyone who's ever brought a BJD to a lolita meetup in my comm has been a nuisance at best and a cringefest at worst. Even if they're not straight up crazy and treat the thing like it's a tiny human with feelings, they're still dragging around something very expensive and fragile that could easily end up damaged somehow, especially if the owner is distracted by eating/chatting/taking photos. And just like people who bring actual babies to meets, they either drop the responsibility of taking care if it on the entire comm or treat everyone around like they are deranged pedo doll thieves. It's just an unnecessary bother and hardly worth the risk.

>>9193667
This. I would never make my SO go to something with me if he would be bored or disinterested. I honestly think it is super inconsiderate to them to be so selfish.

My SO asked if he could come to one of our casual meets (essentially a couple of us going to the pub) and since those members regularly come to our house to hangout they don't mind cause he is friends with them.
Really co-dependent relationships weird me out.

>>9194169
I really like the idea of this! I am wondering how to add that to the group rules tactfully right this minute

>>9194698
You never know anon they might be more active than you think. At least in my comm quite a few meets are organised more socially instead of formally. I.e someone will post "hey who wants to do X on the weekend with me?" Then they will create a group chat and talk about it amoung those interested. The best way to combat newness when organising meets is to be ABOVE AND BEYOND organised and almost professional about it. Have every single detail planned so people can see you are legit and get then get excited about your idea. Get people excited!

>>9195490
Do it anon, it is a quirk that people will find endearing. I am also like this desu. Once it started raining while I was out with a small group, I had a bunch of those clear rain ponchos in my bag for just such an eventuality. everyone was very grateful, it broke the ice with new members and all good friends since

Does anyone else find the Sacramento comm annoying?
They produced a ton of attention whores (WF, soccer mom), keep trying to take over SF, and there's that one girl whose Facebook initials are L. Hw who tries so hard to sound smart in all of her posts/comments but just comes of as super bitchy and like a know-it-all.

>>9196240
I used to work at a stuffed animal company so 1. did go to work with stuffed animals 2. you'd be surprised at the amount of people that DO carry around stuffed animals...they would tell us about it...a lot. They bring them to grocery stores, to work, etc. And not all of them were weird about it, it was a comfort and security thing for them. I know a lot of people do it to combat anxiety.

Of course, there are age players out there who are just gross, but you're getting way too mad about people having toys.

>>9196241
These people, however, should probably get a grip.

>>9196443
I have pretty bad anxiety but going to the grocery store as an adult while clutching onto some raggedy stuffy like a toddler would, would make it 10x worse. I can't even imagine how far into mental illness someone has to be to do that.

>>9196464
I'm guessing a good portion of them put their stuffed animal in a bag or pocket and only take it out when they need it instead of having it out all the time.

>>9195028
Just plug your comm in Lolita 101 panels whenever there's a local anime con, you end up getting tons of newbies then!

>>9196338
As a BJD owner, I have no idea why you would bring one to a lolita meet. aside from the above issues, it's a meetup for lolita... why the fuck would you expect anyone to care about your doll? wait till there's a bjd meet up in your area (or at worst, take it to a con where the goal is connecting people with like interests). basically, keep your dolls at home... please.

>>9196414
I'm guessing you're from SF?

>>9196443
1. You're not comprehending my tone at all.
2. Just keep it to yourself, nothing else is required. The girls bringing shit to meets are no exception.

>when's your next meet up?
Next weekend? There's one I think this weekend but it looks more like a hangout.
>how long has it been since your last meet?
2 weeks.
>what's your average turn out?
Normally between 10-20 people.
>does your comm do any larger events like OTTea Party?
Yep, new years had a huge gathering and there's normally a Christmas meet
>have you ever hosted a meet? Would you be interested in hosting one in the future?
Yes and yes, I'm hosting one later in the fall.
>Do you feel like you fit in with your comm?
Yes and no. I've had a falling out with some girls and we're on good terms now but we're not friends anymore. But for everyone else, things are fine. My comm is pretty nice.
>what's one thing you like about your comm?
Everyone's pretty welcoming and we have so many meets it's almost impossible to not find one to go to.
>what's one thing you would change about your comm?
We have a few people who habitually complain about everything. I'd kick them out, and also some of our whining newbies and the people who keep showing up in jeans or don't show up at all.
>what's your dream meet up?
I don't even think I have one. Maybe a proper ILD one? No one celebrates at ours because summer falls on a con and winter is cold.

>>9196240
>there really are some things you should just keep to yourself and not throw into other's faces.
I don't carry them around but I know someone who does. She's a fucking tech expert and may very well have autism but no one in my friends group acknowledges it. She carries around various stuffed animals and often has some attached to her purse as well. I also used to attach little alpacaso's and what not to my purse until I lost one.

It's perfectly fine and no one in my friends group has a problem with it. Also she makes a ton of money which means she can collect as many stuffed animals as she wishes. She legit always has a new one.

I'm from America btw. I just live in a part of the country that is very accepting of others socially. I don't see the difference between having one as accessory and just carrying one around. It's not like she fucking plays with them, and even if she did, I'd see her as creative. Not retarded.

Not only that but she deserves to be treated well as her ex was abusive towards the fact that she had stuffed animals and would only let her have a certain number and she finally wised up and left his dumb ass and now she gets to have a million.

Good for her.

/co/ would be livid at this conversation.

>>9196494
Good idea anon! Thanks for the hope

>>9191879
I had to join the "city" comm because the local town ones are just... Sad. Sad's a nice word. They're inactive, self righteous itas that have never seen a color wheel. Most coords have a lucky pack main piece and everything else is bodyline or thrifted and I just feel like cringing til my face turns into a black hole and swallows them and their sins into nonexistance.

>>9197124
You poor thing.

>>9197124
Sorry anon.

Though, there's nothing wrong with lucky pack main pieces, they can be worn well. It's not what you wear but how you wear it. There's some nice stuff that was released as lucky packs or special sets. But if they can't color coordinate, or coordinate them at all, that's a different story entirely.

My comm has a lot of people who are like this or were like this, and eventually they improved. Sounds like a lot of beginners, and probably beginners that never evolved out of the beginner stage. I find this happens a lot when people are more isolated and don't really see good examples much themselves in person. Nobody to really inspire them outside places like COF or tumblr which is a mixed bag.

>>9196338
I wouldn't even say meetup. I have some weebs in my city that carry that damned doll around everywhere. one girl even brings a little chair and table set for it to "eat" when she does and talks to it like its a real person. I have seen them at conventions, meet ups and even at MTG nights. I do not understand the compulsion to bring those things everywhere like a security blanket. They are pretty and can be really fun as I own three. But I keep mine at home and set up on a shelf like a collector typically would.

>>9196414
>keep trying to take over SF
lolwhere

Do you mean that they're showing up to SF meets or...? If they're making an effort to compete with SF Comm I don't think anyone's noticed.

>>9197301
It's either b8 or a newfag whose only perception of SanFran and Sac come from what cgl says. Ignore them.

>>9194169
>no plushies
But AP is always putting out kitty, pony, and now duckling plush purses and literally even plush toys that relate to their prints. Not to mention BtSSB and their hordes of Usakumyas.
>BJDs
Again, there's brand collabs with BJD companies. Matching your BJD is pretty amazing and BJDs are by no means children toys. It's almost offensive with those price tags.

Why the fuck is your comm policing you this hard? Is there a story to this you need to explain?

>>9196694
But having a plush toy as something hanging off your bag as a cute accessory is pretty normal. Having a full size teddy that you're carrying around all day is really not.

>>9197328
Like you say, they're purses. Not actual toys.

>>9197299
Jfc that's terrifying. Why are people so damn weird?

>>9197351
As if it's going to look any different to someone who isn't into lolita fashion. I understand that you make the distinction and it makes sense, but even if it's a purse, you're an adult carrying around a plush toy to any onlooker.

>>9197355
Oh I completely agree, I think the plush toy bag thing looks strange and I'd never get one. But I guess it feels less strange than a actual toy within Lolita circles? Are the plush toy bags very popular with Japanese lolitas?

>>9197328
Owning something =/= dragging it around with you in public. Certain brands also release tea sets but that doesn't mean it's normal to walk around with a burando tea pot at every meet.

>>9197159
Don't get me wrong some lucky packs have cute main pieces.
But it's more like they can't afford anything else? Like they get that one lucky pack and that's their brand piece for the year. So all of their purchases are from bodyline and cosmates.
>introduced myself a while back and said my wardrobe is mostly taobao and AP
>girl from "town" comm messaged me "be careful anon. Taobao is from China. You should shop from bodyline. It's actually from Japan! They're reliable. "
>mfw I have no face.

Jfc hlc needs to calm their shit on btb. I don't care what's real or not, but don't post it all over the internet for everyone to see. That's so embarrassing..

>>9198302

Sort of unrelated but I enjoy when people try to come on /cgl/ to say 'ohhh we're not dramatic AT ALL. Nope, not at all! Those rumours you heard weren't true! Also Sally you backstabbing ita you're just jelly of us huehuehue.'

Pretty sure that last sentence was drama.

Josie from Dublin

James is going to declare his undying love for you

he also doesn't drink coffee don't be fooled

>>9197349
And like I said, that's your ideology that isn't going to stick. There are already lots of good examples of people defying what you're saying and I think it's no different than watching cartoons as an adult.
You can carry around a stuffed animal and not be retarded.

>>9194169
Was this really such a big problem that you needed to put rules into place to avoid it? Wow. I can't even imagine. Besides plush bags no one's ever brought toys out, and while some of our comm members have an interest in collecting bjds no one's tried bringing one to a meet.

>>9198707
Didn't it used to be a thing to drag BJDs around back in the lj days? I remember seeing pictures of people putting them in baby carriages?

>>9195005
i got kind of a weird SJW vibe from the comm and I'd recommend looking them up on Rebecca Black Tech. Personally, after the shitstorm that I read about on there (something about 'hazing' a newcomer to the comm for nearly four months) I'd say show up to a meet-up, make some contacts for outings, but spare yourself the headache of trying to play nice with the moderators.

>>9197328
if its matches thats fine plus its a bag. but literally baby plushies like the baby pooh or those ugly TY big eyed plushies dont match and shouldnt be "our comms mascot hehehe"

>>9198710
That was always seen as weird

>>9198712
What did the hazing involve?

>>9191932
....lol girl I hate to break it to you but we're not active at all.

>>9199435
>I...guess I'll just wait a few months...6 months... Until next ILD

>>9199420
Slashing a girl's tires, allegedly

>>9199525
Wtf, isn't that like, the sort of thing you can call the police for damages for?

>>9199554
Yeah, but it's not always likely they'll find out who did it, you know? How do you prove they did it unless someone saw them?

>>9198706
Yeah sure whatever you say.

What's it like to join a new comm if you have a not so shiny reputation in your old one? I have never posted anyone from my comm on here, made secrets on btb, or anything like that.

Should I just hold my breath, own up to my mistakes, and pray for the best?

>>9200815
wot u do

>>9200815
Like the other anon said, it depends on what you did and if there's a trail or someone that can spread your reputation.

>>9199629
Don't you watch anime or something anon? Why is this so hard for you to understand?

Or do you shame people for enjoying adventure time and wearing the shirts?

>>9197301
Pretty sure they just have a personal beef with L, whoever that is, and wanted validation.

>>9199345
And no potatoes.

>>9200846
Watching anime/cartoons is not the same as carrying around a stuffed toy.
When I look at someone on the street, and they're wearing a fur suit, I automatically identify them as heretic scum and burn. If they are not dressed like one, I only know if they are furries by the quiet sounds of yiffing.
They could almost pass, if not for that.

If you carry a stuffed toy, you are obviously deranged, you're literally carrying the evidence. watching anime isn't a smell that sticks to you or Mr. Woogie you take to public toilets with.

>>9200957

>>9200957
>When I look at someone on the street, and they're wearing a fur suit
Where did you see this happen? Unless you live in Vegas or something, but this doubtful unless you were at a convention.
Or maybe you live near Orlando?
I'm pretty skeptical.

I've already explained the similarity. Before you existed, back in like the 70s early 80s, you'd get shunned for being over 18 and enjoying cartoons. He'll sometimes as a teenager I got shit for still watching kids shows. It was considered unacceptable for a period of time.
Now a days? Most adults I know do this. No one has any issues NOW.
Sure, you don't think it's acceptable to carry around a stuffed animal now a days. You may never find it acceptable because you seem pretty set in your ways about your opinions. Has your opinion on anything ever changed?
Regardless, the world goes on with or without you and your opinions and where I live people are okay with adults carrying around stuffed animals as long as they don't act like children when they do it.
You automatically assume that if someone is doing that, that is the act that makes them childish. It's only considered that by some people and as time goes on stuff like this will become more acceptable.

>>9201283
Not that anon, but I used to work at a Joann's and I've had a person in a partial fur suit come in just to shop. They were obviously a teenager but damn it made me cringe. Coworker asked for a photo with them...

>>9200815
What did you do?

>>9201283
not that anon you replied to, but there was a furry that went to my high school and would often wear partial fur suits to school. it didn't break the dress code so the school didn't say anything. even if the school did say something, her parents are both very rich lawyers and would've sued the school just cuz.
i've seen her walking her dog around town with a fur suit or partial fur suit on as well.

Thinking about leaving my comm for a couple of years to focus on school. Could use some advice!
>Will things be weird when I come back?
>Is it okay to only go to the big meetups (ILD, Christmas)
>Should I make a post or announcement on the Facebook page?

>>9202487
I was active in my comm until I moved 6 hours south for college. It's not worth announcing, it's pretty understandable to focus on school, and people will respect that. It's not like you're flouncing or something.
When I moved back, things were a bit different but overall I reconnected with my friends and now we're closer than before. Totally a non-issue.

>>9202498
Cool, thanks for the advice!

>>9202487
Nah, don't announce it, that's kinda spergy. I wasn't able to make meets either because of school, but if I was able to make big meets people would ask how I was and I'd say, "oh, I'm in school and there's a lot going on," and it was fine. And after that, if I was ever able to make it to the meet it was accepted and people ask how school was going and such. No big deal. I guess if you're really active in your comm it might be weird to see people less, but it's very understandable to not go to some meets, and if you only make big ones it's okay. People will understand.

>>9202487
I don't think people would think less of you for leaving for school. Announcing it is up to you but most won't really care. At worse you may be accused of wanting attention but that's pretty much it. Just leave your comm without announcing it. Only those you are close with will notice and know that it's because of education you left if you let them know. I don't know how your comm works, but mine pretty much plans meets for comm members only. But I'm sure they won't think less if you go to the big meets.

I left my comm because I was traveling a lot for work. Once I was more regular at home, I joined back up and it was just as accepting as ever. But the comm kinda fell out of touch even before I left. Been mostly just little cliques of friends using the group to post their "look what I got" photos. Except now has significantly more itas due to con season being in full bloom.

What's the Adelaide comm like?
I'm going interstate for a few days, and I'm not sure of it's worth packing some pieces to meet the comm, or just to explore the town on a casual basis.

>>9194169
>No BJDs

You already look fucking ridiculous in public. Some person carrying an ornate, oftentimes hand-painted doll isn't going to make you look any less stupid to strangers. And no, using the argument "its a bag!!" isn't going to make your giant bunny or pony purse any less ageplay looking than a plush doll. What's the logic here? Do all of your mods just have sticks up their asses?

>>9203419
Read the other replies to that post. I love BJDs myself but people who carry them around in public are insane 99% of the time so banning them from meetups is a way to keep their cringe in check.

I was at a meet up recently where a girl pretty much ran away from us. She made some excuse and then later one of our group saw her eating lunch in a bar by herself. It was pretty weird. It was a small meet up, so it was really obvious she just bounced.

>>9203544
Maybe she just got anxious or something? I sometimes start to feel extremely uncomfortable for some reason and leave a bit early. Usually I only want to go home after that and get a hug but who knows how she felt.

>when's your next meet up?
I think Halloween?
>how long has it been since your last meet?
A few weeks.
>what's your average turn out?
10-15, we have a very small comm.
>does your comm do any larger events like OTTea Party?
Haha no we have maybe 50 members and only 20 active members.
>have you ever hosted a meet? Would you be interested in hosting one in the future?
I tried to last year, hopefully soon I can!
>Do you feel like you fit in with your comm?
Kind of? My comm is small and a lot of our members are young and don't really understand lolita. there's a few girls that I get along with really well though.
>what's one thing you like about your comm?
I love how tight knit we are, it's kind of clique-y but I'm personally okay with that.
>what's one thing you would change about your comm?
How butthurt new members get about concrit.
>what's your dream meet up?
Oh boy I don't know, I'd be really happy if not every meet up turned into a stupid photoshoot.

>>9203544
She might have had to meet someone at short notice and then not known where you guys were, I had that happen to me once but I had the phone number of the organiser to text when I wanted to meet back up again.

My comm is having a meet up at a brewery, god bless I love my comm so much.

Has this been posted yet? Another awful article about lolita, this time by Vice

http://www.vice.com/en_ca/read/inside-the-magical-world-of-lolitas

>>9203890
Better than most I've read. The whole bit about cyberbullying was weird though.

>>9203890
>Milky Swan, a 28-year-old lolita and teacher's aide by day, invited me into her apartment in London to see her impressive collection of 14 dresses
>impressive collection of 14 dresses
>mysides.jpg

Can we collectively agree to shitlist people who agree to do interviews with outside media? This entire thing is stupid. Also why does everyone look like doughy pieces of lard in the photos?

>>9203917
Isn't this the girl who wore a hijab for a hot second until cgl jumped on her for wearing it as a trend?

>>9203920
This is her, right?

>>9203922
Lol yes

>>9203922
Then this is her wardrobe?
>impressive
>kek

>>9203927
This photo depresses me

>>9203917
Did she tell them the name of her dress and they thought it was her actual name?

>Hi I'm Milky Swan and I'm wearing Milky Swan while hold my friend Milky, the swan

>>9203936
that thing looks like a duck, and she probably didn't want to use her real name or something.

>>9203927
It's not great but it could be worse.

>>9203917
Her fucking chin

>>9203927
>those bags all smashed together
>wig just thown up on the top shelf, on top of a baby sceptre
>munchkin

....yeesh

>>9203922
The fuck is her face?

>>9203917
>>9203922
This woman has annoyed the fuck out of me ever since she started posting. She's so thirsty for attention it's giving me second hand embarrassment. At least her makeup has improved and she no longer looks like a nightmare clown, I guess?

>>9203419
BJD fans are such cringelords, ugh. Please stop carrying around your dumb doll to a fashion meet.

>>9203922
the forehead. jesus. She couldn't have placed that hijab any farther back could she?

>>9203917
I agree on shitlisting. A girl did an interview in my city for a local culture publcation, but she was interviewed alongside all these cringey cosplayers and asserted that lolita is like cosplay because we're dressing up to pretend to be someone else. and that we're all doing it for attention and asspats. I was really disappointed when I saw it, it's such an attention get and makes us all look bad.

>>9205184
Don't insult anon's husband like that! You just don't understand their beautiful love!

Who do you hate more: BJD owners or littles?

sorry for the newbie question, I live in France and I'd like to meet lolita or to talk with a lolita who live near my town before really starting to wear the fashion . I was searching on google " lolita france " and the first result was a site where french lolitas where making really strange rant post (it was a little creepy, but I just go on the wrong website ) , and the other was more about talking and selling stuff, but not a one about comms. If someone can give me a link to a site or a facebook it would be really nice.

>>9206017
I shouldn't be replying to shitty b8, but no one here implied we hate BJD owners. we just hate the crazy ones who take their dolls to meets

>/bjd convo

>>9206017
Littles, how is that even a contest? My comm has plenty BJD owners and none have brought any to meet ups. Littles are fucking creepy.

>>9206017
Littles, definitely. BJD owners are mostly fine aside from a few cringey bad apples who think their dolls are real people and lug them around, but littles are always gross.

>>9206563
Try to search your next biggest city's name + lolita on facebook, that often does the trick.

>>9206676
Do ageplayers really come out to comm meets? I live far from my nearest comm so i haven't had a chance to go. Wtf do they do, half ass it and act like a baby?

>>9206905
There's a girl in my comm who admitted to being in a ddlg relationship. She never raised any flags. Her coords aren't bad, she doesn't act fake-cute, and she talks about normal stuff with the rest of us.

I feel bad for being prejudiced but I do see her in a different light. It's not like everyone has a car, but her bf would drop her off and pick her up from meets--now I can't help but be reminded of a parent picking up/dropping off their kid at a playdate.

>>9206905
I've never personally witnessed anyone being overtly fetishy at a meetup, but there is one girl in my comm who will take selfies during meetups and then post them to social media with "I love making daddy hard with my cuteness"- type comments. Like one selfie will be all #ddlg #cummies and the next, taken and posted seconds later, will be a pic of her and other lolitas at the meetup tagged with our comm name. It grosses me out but the mods say she can do what she want as long as she doesn't involve us (more than she's already involving us I guess?) and I can easily just not check her social media.
We also have a woman who drags her SO to every meet and talks like a baby but I think she's just an annoying weeb who thinks that makes her kawaii rather than a fetishist.

>>9206953
does she work in the sex industry? I don't get how you could post that shit on social media that your friends can see, wtf

>>9206951
Meh, as long as she acts normal about it. Diff strokes for diff folks, and I'd be lying if I said I never roleplayed weird shit in the bedroom.

>>9206563
Have you seen this spreadsheet? It looks like French comms are based in Strasbourg and Paris:
https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1evXegSoFbfEXn8o0joeA-KFvolNKPKllgvaYqNgvOiw/htmlview#gid=1

>>9206905
One in my comm does, and always talks about her pedophile boyfriend buying dresses for her (bodyline shit too, acting like 50$ is a lot for a dress), and how hes "a great caregiver"

shes also like 17 dating a 25 yr old so theres nothing but red flags here.

>>9206859
ok thank you

>>9206859
>>9207981
fuck I forgot lolita was a fucking name in France

>>9206959
Nope, she's a student and works retail part time afaik. Some people are really trying to push for making public sex talk socially acceptable and I guess she's one of them. Call me a kink-shaming prude but ew.

There is a woman in my comm who creepily brings her husband to every meet, she went abroad to Disneyland recently and seems to have dumped her husband for some faketanned guy she met there. Hope that means she stops bringing him.

>>9206563
C'est un peu bizarre comme question. Dans quel coin de la France es-tu ?

>>9206563
There's a large country-wide fb group called "lolita garden". I suggest you join, and then ask in the group if there's anyone in your area, or a local comm.

>>9207989
that's not kinkshaming. I'm a freak in the bedroom but I keep that shit off social media because nonconsensually exposing it to other people is rude. Plus I'm a professional with actual goals in my career and I wouldn't want people in my field to see that shit.

>>9209307

Seriously, people who are all like "no everyone has to know explicit details about my ageplay-BDSM-scat fantasies" are clearly disregarding an important facet of BDSM, which is consent, particularly that of third parties.

Not to mention I also have a professional career. Freaky shit stays with my boyfriend, in the bedroom.

>>9209168
What about it makes bringing her husband creepy?

What do you guys think about shopping meets? My comm is in one of the cities with a BtSSB store and I really want to have a shopping meet there, but some other comm members I talked to said that could make some people uncomfortable or jealous if they can only afford a pair of socks and other girls are buying multiple dresses. Personally, I think it's one of those "don't like it, don't come" type of things, but I wanted some more opinions.

>>9206953
I'm surprised that the mods don't make her have separate accounts if she's gonna do that shit. I would never be in a photo with her.

>>9209374
maybe frame it less as an official "meetup" and more of a casual shopping trip. it would effectively be the same but present it as "hey I'm going to btssb on ____. does anyone want to join me on a shopping trip?" that would make it seem less like people are missing out on something official if they can afford to go

>>9209395
cant*

>>9209395
>>9209374
No, just phrase it like an official meetup. Even if you *can* afford to go, sometimes you just don't want to buy anything in the moment. It's not crazy to go to a store and look around and leave without buying anything. If people don't want to go, then they won't.

SoCal comm here: Is anyone going to this event in LA? Seems pretty chill but I don't really know if I should shell out $30 for it.

>>9209546
Zippercut used to throw awesome events a few years back, I think it's awesome that they're back and have been encouraging everyone to go. Obviously it's been a while since the last thing they hosted, but if it's anything like the ones in the past it will be a good time.

>>9209374
SF? Because if it is, every girl I know in the comm has /some/ disposable income that's available pretty much all the time. Even the college kids have part times.

There's nothing wrong with window shopping too, like the other anon said.

Is it worth it to join the Atlanta comm if you don't live super close to it? My comm is still a bit away from me and it doesn't have many meets very often and they're usually super small so I was thinking maybe if the Atlanta comm had some big meets it would be worth it to attend. I've heard about all the shitty drama and stuff but I don't really care too much I'm sure there's girls who aren't crazy in the comm who would still be fun to meet.

>>9209796
Not in ATL but I'd say it's probably worth it. If you join you can at least check out their events and decide if any of them are worth traveling for.

>>9203927
But why does she have two pairs of identical yellow teaparties?

>>9209546
>nun themed event
5000 nameless poems

>>9209773
what is the SF comm like? Been thinking about joining.

>>9209840
Big, but strangely personal because the attendance at meetups usually varies due to peoples' availability and general region. Fairly easy to make friends. There are definitely "cliques," but they're mostly because some people have just known each other for longer so they're more comfortable with each other and will show up to each others' meetups.

Meetups are generally very chill, usually have to do with food because everyone loves to eat and the Bay Area is an ideal location for that. The monthly meetups vary-- sometimes there's a lot of people, sometimes there's just a handful.

Not a ton of itas or cringey people, and of course the ones who are actually a problem have been banned. All in all, a very active and pleasant comm with a wide variety of events to attend.

Anyone know if the Tokyo comm is accepting of brolitas? I don't want to creep on anyone (I'm married). I just want to hang out and talk about frilly clothes.

Mostly I need someone to go with me to the Baby tea party. Guys can't go alone.

>>9209810
She's got two identical reds as well.

>>9209796
>>9209803
ATL is batshit. Save yourself.

>>9210168
Why wouldn't they?

>>9197355
its not about what normies will think it is more about if its reasonable or not. pro tip, carrying toys around is NOT reasonable

>>9209840
Basically what the other anon said but they didn't mention that there are "cliques" that form based on what region you're in and what meetups you tend to attend. If you're new, show up at a monthly meet or two because those are easy to get to and are more laid back than a more structured event like a tea party.
Not sure how old you are but pretty much all of the members are in their mid-late 20's. There are some younger members but you won't get literal children running around at meets. Afaik everyone is at least 18.
Everyone is really friendly and sweet and easy to chat with even if they're awkward at first. (I'm one of the awk ones. I accidentally spill my spaghetti sometimes and then get really embarrassed about it.) It's really easy to make friends imo.

>>9209830
This is actually a good halloween tea party name. "Night of 5000 Nameless Poems"

Seattle/pdx gulls, how do you like your comm?

>>9209546
I'll be going. I really want to meet RinRin so the price tag wasn't a issue for me. It seems like it'll be a medium sized event since a good number of people RSVPed on Facebook.

>>9209546
$30 is on the cheaper/normal side in my comm. When we have guests ours is generally $50-60. Our rinrin event was around $60 and not 6 hours long. It was about 2 and a half but we were fed.
Is this just to bring her, rent the church and have the photobooks?

>>9210805
Pdx gull here. Our comm is alright, pretty laid back and friendly for the most part. We haven't had a lot of meets lately, but I think it's because everyone's busy getting ready for Kumoricon.

>>9210768
>>9209865
okay, sweet! I'm definitely not young, and that was actually something I was afraid of. Good to know! Thanks you guys.

>>9211907
Oh cool good to know! I might be moving there soonish.

>>9209193
>>9209244
ok thanks anons, I live in Rennes .

Are the nebraska cons dead? I tried joining on facebook but no response. I'll probably message the admins later but was wondering if there was anyone here that I could talk to? I'm visiting the area and going to Nebraskon so I'd like to see if there would be any lolita events going on.

Honestly, the worst part about being in a community full of flakes, is that after giving them the opportunity to speak up about what they would like for the meet-up, they are now finally complaining because they don't want it to land near Halloween.

>>9214215
passive aggressive much...

>>9214335
I don't feel as though anyone owes me anything for planning and hosting, but it just bugs me that despite given the ample opportunity to make sure things were alright for the majority, instead of discussing it where they were supposed to, they started threads where they openly bitched about things that had been set through polls, because none of them had bothered to post. Now that the event is set, they have ~concerns, and want to be able to make changes. It's about the courtesy aspect, since I gave them more than a month's notice to discuss it.

>>9209840
It's big, and somewhat chill. It gets policed so that anyone who doesn't fit gets banned.

>>9214357
"Doesn't fit" meaning people who threaten violence or jerk off in burando fitting rooms.

This bitch.

>>9214541

>>9214543

>>9214545
I saw this go down, here's the dress she posted.

>>9214553
The "mean" comment, the bitch is in her 30s too.

>>9209546
>>9211868

$30 is pretty much venue and food cost, and that is a much fairer price than their original $60-$90. All the photographers, brand owners of goodie bags, and even RinRin herself are personal friends of the hosts and costs them next to nothing to get them for a small event.

>>9214556
the internet is riddled with piss babies this evening

>>9214545
Cool, she's making a containment group. Can we send all the special coord it's there? I'm for it.

>>9214622
I'm pretty excited to not have to put up with her. She's throwing a massive tantrum now on the local cosplay community saying lolitas are meanies.

>>9214697
Caps?

>>9214700
This was posted in the local cosplay community and of course she had to share it from her cosplay page for maximum attention

>>9214704
The replies. Someone from the comm who is also a cosplayer replied too.

>>9214706
Blue is clearing things up.

>>9214553
this might be the ugliest thing i've seen in a while. that takes talent

>>9214753
There's another 5 or so pages of screen caps of her arguing with blue. I'm glad I just kept my mouth shut. Girl won't understand logic at all.

Is the "SoCal Lolitas" comm listed in the spreadsheet still active? Facebook gives me an error message when I try to open the link.

>>9214781
Most of SoCal's lolita groups were renamed because of the Hello Lace purge. Replace the word "lolita" with EGL and you'll be able to find the groups.

>>9214706
>>9214707
You go, Blue.
Whiny girl is a lost cause but I still (naively) hope that other communities don't think we're all evil puppy-stabbing cuntbags.

>>9214704
If anyone can just ignore the rules and call themselves a lolita, then how would the fashion even be defined? Where do you draw the line? If someone wore a t-shirt and jeans and called themselves a lolita who was just ~bending all the rules~ would this person consider them a lolita? What's the point of the label "lolita" in that case? I can't wrap my head around this kind of mindset no matter how hard I try.

>>9214697
Well to be fair many Lolita's ARE meanies but that still doesn't change the fact that her cosplay is not good Lolita. Why do people want everything under the sun to somehow magically be lolita instead of just making an actual lolita coord. It's not that hard, she's just a whiner. At that age, it's a little embarrassing.

>>9214935
Eventually Blue gave up because this bitch won't see logic. Highlights of the argument are: Whiner asking Blue why she made it public and Blue telling her she replied to a comment crossposted to every local community, and Blue finally giving up and leaving.

>how long has it been since your last meet?
A couple months
>what's your average turn out?
About 10
>does your comm do any larger events like OTTea Party?
Nope
>have you ever hosted a meet? Would you be interested in hosting one in the future?
I'm interested but I dont know my comm that well. I'm kind of new.
>Do you feel like you fit in with your comm?
A little bit. They're all pretty friendly.
>what's one thing you like about your comm?
How friendly everyone seems.
>what's one thing you would change about your comm?
More meet ups. Meet ups in different parts of the state. More varied locations.
>what's your dream meet up?
A historic house tour, an aquarium, on a boat, a tea party, a garden party, bowling. Pretty much all the fun meet up ideas I hear about on here.

>>9214381
These didn't happen.

>post joke about thetans on personal fb page
>people from my comm start responding
So. I just found out there are some girls in my comm who are scientologists? They didn't find it funny.

>>9214553
>that thick, contrasting overlocking
??????
what is even going on

A girl in my comm is gonna be doing a cringy newspaper article and a student documentary that'll be released online. How can I best distance myself from this?

>>9223804
Say you're uncomfortable with exposure in media and would prefer to not participate, that should be enough.

>>9223812
They probably aren't and the person doing the article might be aware of their online presence.

>>9223812
>>9223879
Unfortunately the girl in question is an attention whore, I believe the interview/ filming is only taking place at her house though. I'm thinking more along the lines of damage control in the comm and the inevitable cringe fest that'll show up on cgl/ btb.

How would you gals feel about someone vlogging during your meet? I might go to a meet with a friend but one of their comm wants to vlog during.

>>9223961
I'd rather have people enjoy the socializing aspects over being a digital witness during the duration of the meet. I think I'd be ok with it if the participants were well dressed, but that's hard to predict unfortunately.

imo, anyone who wants to vlog should at least inform meetup participants that they're going to take videos and see if everyone's ok with (being in) it, see who wants to stay out of shoots, or is fine with face blurring.

Additionally, some places might not allow video shooting, so that's something the vlogger should be aware of.

>>9223580
That's so creepy. Which area are you in?

>>9223961
I think the meet attendees need to be ok with it unless she is just filming a couple of quick short takes of herself only and maybe the venue. Even then, it would be polite to clear it with the meet host too.

I can understand wanting to vlog a nice normal meet in order to show new girls that it's not so scary but that would have to be something like a project that everyone did together.

>>9189211
>when's your next meet up?
this thursday, but I can't go...
>how long has it been since your last meet?
damn, a couple months
>what's your average turn out?
pretty large, considering my comm is big
>does your comm do any larger events like OTTea Party?
yep
>have you ever hosted a meet? Would you be interested in hosting one in the future?
naaahh
>Do you feel like you fit in with your comm?
not very well, I usually dont end up talking to many people... some people get more confident in lolita but i turn into a blubbering mess
>what's one thing you like about your comm?
so many friendly people!!!
>what's one thing you would change about your comm?
ban nasty boyfriends from meet ups holy hell
>what's your dream meet up?
lolita 10 KM mountain trail hike

>>9223961
I really hate it. Someone in my comm does it a lot and I just stopped going to meets because sometimes you would turn around in the middle of a convo with someone else and there would just be this camera on you. She has got better at asking people to opt out of being in her final videos since someone else complained but its still really uncomfortable to have to.

>>9224342
>lolita 10 KM mountain trail hike
ngl I'd love to do a nature hike with my comm, even a short one. There's a bunch of girls who are also into mori and keep saying how much they love nature but the most they ever do is dress up in AliExpress clothing and take pictures in their backyard. Let's go climb a mountain, bitches!

>>9224355
I'm glad the girl in my comm who vlogged moved to Canada. She never asked if people wanted to be in her videos.

>when's your next meet up?
Halloween meetup at the end of October
>how long has it been since your last meet?
Only a couple days - I went to DLD this past weekend
>what's your average turn out?
~10-20
>does your comm do any larger events like OTTea Party?
Besides ILD, nothing that's made people from other comms want to attend
>have you ever hosted a meet? Would you be interested in hosting one in the future?
I've hosted several, but at this point, I feel like I've already hosted all the meetuls I wanted to host
>Do you feel like you fit in with your comm?
I recently moved a couple months ago, so I still kinda feel out of place even though I do have a couple friends already
>what's one thing you like about your comm?
It used to be drama-filled, but all those people left from what I heard. Now, the people are nice.
>what's one thing you would change about your comm?
Some people just don't know how to dress in lolita at all.
>what's your dream meet up?
I'd love to have a group see Phantom Of The Opera on Broadway!

>>9223961
>>9224013
I think it's interesting to see how lolita meets have changed, back in the lj days meetup pics & video were really popular. My first meets had everyone taking pics on their cameras, and I remember video wasn't unheard of either. I got excited seeing pictures of myself in a meet up post on egl.
I also think people have the right to not be filmed or photographed without knowing. It's interesting how the mindset has shifted.

>>9225351
I used to really like seeing photos from other people's comm meets on lj, too. Maybe because there were fewer meets and comms at the time, now it seems completely impossible to post about every meet.

>>9225351
My comm usually still takes lots of pictures at meets but instead of posting them publicly they just get shared in the comm group after the meet. I'm sure thats the same way for a lot of comms. Not everyone likes to have their picture shared out to the wider community but inside the comm is pretty safe.

>>9225351
I think it's more cgl's stigma against e-fame hungry camwhores that seperates filming at meets back in the day from doing it now. When people did it back in the old days it was mostly just for fun. Now 7/10 people are just trying to create content for their YT channel.

>>9225511
Why does cgl hate that so much?
Or is it just the general hatred for fame hungry people? But if that's the case, why do some people get a pass?

>>9225511
Yeah, this is it. Consenting to video of you being shared on a small, niche fashion group is very different from agreeing to be broadcast to sometimes tens of thousands of randoms on Youtube, which is usually where those videos are ending up now.

>>9225511
People did it for e-fame back then too.

Some girl in my comm keeps trying to be some kind of lolita hipster by shitting on anything popular from popular dresses to asking why people even bother to spend money on Automatic Honey jewelry. It's annoying as fuck.

>>9226784
You can unfriend her and get over it.

>>9227523
Are you her? Kek.

Just came back from hosting my very first meet! I think it went well, and I hope everyone had as good of a time as I did. They were all so nice. Feels good gulls.