/cgl/ - Cosplay & EGL

>>8076138
So far I've kept it down to just impulse shopping on AliExpress. I spend hours a day looking at internet shopping I can't afford though.

Once I got a job I always blew my paychecks within two days. Now I am a bit better with spending but I think I am a shopoholic

I think I do have a problem when it comes to shopping. Whenever I feel upset or stressed, I shop. Whenever I'm happy or celebrating something, I shop. Pretty much any excuse to shop, I'll do it. I got myself into serious debt several times because of my problem. I've more or less got it under control now, but sometimes I just want to let loose and spend a ton of money. I think the thing that really set it off for me was online shopping. It's just so easy and you don't feel like you're spending actual money since you never see it. I control my problem a lot more by limiting my online purchases and only using cash when I'm out. Really seeing the money helps me to cut back. While I'm getting better now, there's still a ton of clothes and shoes in my wardrobe that have never been worn.

If I have had a really bad, and I mean coming home and wanting to cry bad, couple of days at work I'll buy myself something online. It's how I ended up with a Mr Yan pillow, Bodyline dresses, Loot Crates, Mirukuma lucky packs and Lolita Desu surprise packs. So now I have a room packed full of cheap crap like a hoarder. My reasoning is that these things are pretty cheap and need a little something to cheer me up and look forward to. Fast forward a couple of weeks when the stuff arrives and I have forgotten about it. I have also ended up with the same Bodyline wig but in several different shades because I have forgotten what I ordered and re-ordered it a week later.

I often look at online shops when I feel down but generally don't buy anything. I think my boyfriend grossly overestimates how much money I spend because he often sees me browsing online stores.

When I do get around to spending money it's an emotional rollercoaster for me. When I decide to buy something I get very excited and feel great, then an hour or two after paying I feel guilty. While waiting for the package to arrive I feel good and excited again, then when I see the customs fee I feel like shit. Then when the package arrives I feel great for the rest of the day. It's exhausting so I only go through this process once every few months.

>>8076138
No because I still feel really guilty spending any amount over $50. My family has never approved of spending anything over $50 on clothing and even though I'm on my own I still live with that in the back of my mind. This also means that I bargain hunt like crazy but sometimes I wish I could just let go and not worry about how much everything is costing me.

>>8076138
I was one of those anons in the feels thread (the suicide anon) and I've definitely never had a shopping addiction. With me it's just that at certain points in my life, lolita has literally been my only hobby and only creative outlet, since I wasn't that well off and I dropped every other hobby I had to spend money on. All that was left other than lolita was cheap, passive hobbies like watching TV and anime online, which don't help to calm my thoughts when I'm agitated because they don't engage the brain as much as hunting down pieces or whatever. So I was spending all my free cash on lolita, but that was because I had no other hobbies and no friends in the area, not because I was addicted or getting into debt over it. At the moment I'm trying to budget for spending on enjoyable activities other than lolita, and not allowing myself to use that money for lolita even if I don't spend it.

Online shopping certainly makes it easier to impulse buy, but with lolita everything takes so damn long to arrive in the mail that it doesn't really give me that feeling of instant satisfaction.

I love shopping but I'm so glad I don't have an addiction to it. I've also always been a huge money saver even though I don't have too.
Honestly for me lolita itself makes me super happy. Even when I just had one coord it made me happy so I feel like that's why I don't have a shopping addiction.
I appreciate what I already have and don't need to buy more to fill a hole because what I already have makes me super happy.

I'm guilty of shopping emotionally. I'm often feeling down or kind of sad, and buying new things makes me excited for a while. I think I also shop because I sometimes have nothing else to do, I have few friends so after school when I don't know what to do, I often go shopping on my way home since I live in the middle of the "antiques district" in my town, and there are very many vintage and antique shops. That kind of shopping relaxes me since the stores are so nice and comforting to be in, but even if I tell myself I'm only window shopping I always end up taking something home.
If I'm really upset and feeling bad about myself, I buy new dresses sometimes. It's probably not the best thing to do, but it makes me happy. I think I have a shopping problem, but it hasn't ever been big enough to land me in debt or anything. Still, I have a hard time saving my money even though I know I should be saving to move out of the country next year.

>>8076138

I'm not sure if this is normal or not but I feel really low when something comes up for sale when I can't afford it and lose out on it.
I don't have a creditcard so it's likely the item is sold out till the time I get more money.
Sometimes I even try to sell some of my things just so I can buy a specific item, but there's no guarantee someone will buy those things for you or by the time you get your money, the item you wanted has sold.
I do order a lot, and whenever I do it really boosts my mood. Unfortunately I live in a country where you need to pay a lot of customs tax so I always en up paying more than I should which sucks.
But the excitement of your new things arriving beats the suckiness of the tax, unless you end up regretting your purchace of course.

>>8076225
I do the thrift shop thing, but I don't usually end up buying anything. I actually have a specific shopping list of generic items I need (e.g. nice white work blouse) that would be cheaper to buy in charity shops than new, but it's hard to find most of them so I just browse for 20 minutes a day because it's warmer than standing outside waiting for a bus.

>>8076232
I get really upset/annoyed when items I had on my vague wishlist sell out, which happens fairly often because there are ~100 items on my Taobao wishlist. It's even worse when a sold-out item restocks and I don't have the money to buy the restock, like what happened with that Chess Story short coat (I really hope they restock it again, I liked it in two of the colours). I also get bothered for weeks or even months when I pass up a sale on an item because I thought it was overpriced, but then don't see the item again. That happens even with thrift shop stuff where I think "hmm, if I still want it tomorrow I'll buy it, but I won't buy it now because it's expensive for a thrift store", and then when I come back the next day it's sold out. It bothers me for ages, but I can't just do the opposite and impulse buy things because then I waste money on things I never use.

I have a shopping addiction, but thanks to having rich parents and a well paying job I've been able to feed it. Sux 2 b poorfag.

I hate admitting it, but I do have an addiction. I currently feel like something is missing in my life and buying things will fill that void for a short time, but not long. I'm currently just under a grand in debt and since buying anything makes me feel worse than before I'm hoping I can stop and pay off my credit cards.

I feel stupid saying that but overall I'm not an overly materialistic person. I do have several collections, but that's stuff I use (clothes, tea, fabrics etc). I cannot live in a place filled with things I don't really care about, and I feel like it's saving me from a possible shopping addiction. I always think twice about buying something and check my accounts as well as prioritize my hobbies, I keep all of that in check.

Wouldn't say I have an addiction but I can't argue being materialistic. I like stuff, especially Lolita clothes and accessories. Since I have a good paying job, no loans and my own apartment I feel like I can spend my money on stuff. Even though it was an eye opener for me when I sat down and counted how much money I spent on stuff directly from IW and ended up over 1 milj yen... I might need to email them again and ask for a special members card... I think I have earned one even if I don't live in Japan.

I'm taking a few months break from buying clothes, as I've recognised that I do it when I am sad or stressed. A new dress makes me feel happy, and distracts me for everyday life. Hopefully I can find something more productive to fill the gap while I'm on this ban.

I used to be frugal as fuck, but now I have disposable income I spend way too much on things I don't need.

Wouldn't say I have an addiction but I can't argue being materialistic. I like stuff, especially Lolita clothes and accessories. Since I have a good paying job, no loans and my own apartment I feel like I can spend my money on stuff. Even though it was an eye opener for me when I sat down and counted how much money I spent on stuff directly from IW in 2014 and ended up over 1 milj yen... I might need to email them again and ask for a special members card... I think I have earned one even if I don't live in Japan.

I started buying lolita in october, have 60 ish main pieces right now. I've filled one wardrobe full so starting to wind down on the shopping. Have 10 dresses coming from auctions and some basics from taobao, it has made me very happy as I have not cared about clothes in a long time. I used to dress 50's/vintage but nothing was quite there for me. I spent maybe 5,000 but it was from my savings. I will probably continue to browse auctions but that is to find matching items and the few elusive dream dresses

>>8076259
...Milkyfawn, is that you?

>>8076266
I feel the same anon. Can we be friends?

I earn enough money to be able to spend $500-$1000 per month on lolita and I am not in debt. I have thousands of dollars saved up too, but I'm also in the point in my life where I need to be saving up a $100k for family planning, house, etc.

I am older and just got into lolita and I don't really want to waste my youthful years saving money when I can wear lolita!

And lolita is also my only hobby so...

I spend every pay check on brand, sometimes skipping a phone bill in order to get desired burrando

I recently got a second job to combat the spending a bit but I just spend that check now too.

Someone help me
>I can't even help myself

>>8076439
Different anon, but I'm in the same boat. The industry I'm in is so unstable though, it feels like there is no point saving for a house. So why not spend most of my money on something that makes me happy?

I'm lucky enough to have been brought up in a richer family than the average person to fuel my shopping desires. I wasn't until after filling up my huge closet (pretty much the size of a room) that my parents confronted me about the problem.
After going to college and then moving out, I've reduced my wardrobe to maybe 30% of what it once was. It's still a lot, but manageable and not like I had more outfits than I could wear a year.

I spend under $100 a month (except when I get a $100+ dress, which is maybe every 2-4 months) so I don't think I am *too* addicted.

>>8076473
The reason why people invest in houses is that those have a practical value as you can still live in them no matter what so if you really are in the situation that you spend $1000 a month to buy fucking dresses try cutting that down a little to save up for some permanent burando storage space. And get a different hobby in the meantime like get a dog or make your own clothing or take proper pictures of your comm friends or become league of legend streamers.

I spend a lot of money, usually my paycheck within a week, but I've been doing way better to cut that down because I'm ending my contract job in a week and will only get my workman's comp type pension (military broke me permanently. 70% disabled thanks to them, and that's in one category for those of you who understand what that means)
I'm going to go to school soon, so its not as big a deal because I have grants to pay for it. I just need to stop buying stuff.

I have posted in these threads before, but my shopping addiction is really strong. I like collecting things so when I get into hobbies I mainly want to buy buy buy. With lolita, since it is mostly about buying, I go nuts. I used to think spending $100 on something was ridiculous. Now that is chump change.

I spend on average $500-$1000 a month on stuff, not only lolita but I would say about 60% it is. I mainly look for good deals as opposed to buying new, but that feeds into me overspending because I justify it as a good deal. If I am online, I shop browse 80% of the time. I go between shopping, tumblr, and youtube. I am not in debt because my family still gives me money which I take and spend with extreme guilt.

I know I have a lot of problems. I have been between jobs for a year and spend most of the day on the computer because I am doing temp editing jobs at the moment. It's too easy to tab to the internet.

I have had terrible self esteem and I want to say some kind of depression and anxiety for over a decade now. I looked for treatment when I was younger, used to pay for a therapist out of pocket, but it didn't help. My parents are both very sick and have a troubled marriage, my boyfriend has depression, my cat is sick, my friends all cosplay now so we don't interact much anymore because they are in cosplay mode 24/7, and nothing makes me happy except hunting for items on my wishlist. When I get them, I am happy opening the box, satisfied about my collection, but not happy overall.

I have been trying to discipline myself to only spend $200 a month each month on hobbies, but I blew over that mount in the first two weeks of Jan. I have been trying to do other hobbies, art, gaming, tennis, but I feel basically dead inside so they feel more like a pain than enjoyable.

I really need like, a lolita shopping addiction anonymous group or friend so we can support each other and get out of this rut.

I think as long as you're shopping for the item itself because using or wearing it gives you pleasure that's fine but some people just shop for the feeling of shopping and then dumb the items somewhere without even unpacking them. Either can kill your wallet but the latter is really fucked.

I'm trying to nip my problem in the bud, I just paid off my maxed credit card today and I'm not buying anything until my next con.

I definitely am addicted and I shop to fill a void. It feels great for a bit and then it goes away right as I get the item in my hands. On the bright side, at least I can bring myself to sell things I change my mind on so I won't be becoming a horder anytime soon.

>>8076590 is me.

In fact, does anyone want to be my anon shopping addiction friend? I can post my email so we can write to each other, and if you have gmail we can even IM each other when the temptation strikes. I'm especially keen on talking to someone who is depressed/anxious, spends close to what I do, or has any other similarities.

>>8076612
Lets be friends anon ;_;

>>8076621
Here's my email <3

>>8076651
Added you to chat on gmail <3

I've had a lot of disposable income for the past few years, so I've been able to get away with spending up to 500 a month on clothes, I'm just worried about how I'll manage when I can't spend so frivolously. There are some emotional elements to it (eg it's like a temporary 'quick fix' for my low self esteem) but it doesn't feel like an addiction at this point. I'm sure it would probably feel like it when I need to stop.

>>8076538
I get that it makes sense for some people, but lots of people in the same job as me don't buy a house for this reason. If I have to move across the country every now and then, a permanent place of residence is a mistake. Not planning on having a family either.

On average I spend about £150-£200 a month on hobbies. I'm giving it a rest for a bit because it's pretty addictive buying stuff online and I don't want to get bad habits.

>>8076522
That sounds pretty normal to me, anon.

>>8076596
This is pretty much how I feel about it too. People spending thousands of dollars a month on lolita is pretty crazy, even if they have high-paid jobs, but it's not that bad if they're at least wearing the stuff.

I would say it's somewhat of an addiction for me. The majority of my time spent online is browsing some variety of lolita sales page. However, since I'm married my husband can keep me in check for the most part. Not always. I did once unintentionally rack up a decent chunk of debt on Monster High dolls. Instead of actually buying things most of the time, I'll tally everything up and weep interally thinking that if I could spend $3000, I would own 15 new dresses and headbows, 5 blouses, 6 pairs of shoes, 10 accessories, and 8 novelty items. Winning the lotto is a big dream of mine.

>>8076651
Is it okay if I add you too? My throwaway is in the field.

I definitely have a shopping addiction. It was fine when I lived at home and had barely any bills, but when I moved out, I still spent $1k+ a month on lolita and didn't change my habits at all. I buy multiple items a week... It was okay for awhile but my savings are dwindling. I know it's an issue but I keep making excuses for it, like "Well it's such a good deal," "The resale value will be so great," or "Okay, this is is the last time." I'm starting a new budget this month but it's still really difficult for me.

I don't feel like my addiction is out of depression -- I don't shop when I'm sad. I's just that lolita is my biggest hobby, if not my only one. It's so easy for me to browse at work (an office job).

>>8076837
My parents would disagree, anon.

>>8076612
I have problems with a shopping addiction too anon and I have been diagnosed with anxiety and minor depression, can I add you too?

>>8077062
Well, if they give you grief about it, try to put it in perspective. My parents might think it was silly if they knew my lolita budget was $200/month, but they each spend at least that much on feeding their pets. Other people spend money on other things - my husband likes to get $40 dollar bottles of whiskey each week. At least lolita will earn me some money back in the end whenever I end up leaving the hobby - those other things are consumable and the money will never be returned.

>>8077172
Exactly. I used a similar argument with my parents when I was living at home and spending all my money on video games.
>at least it's not on drugs like those other kids

>>8077129
Definitely, please send me an email. <3 I'd be more than happy to talk with you!

There are times I become frightfully close to this but I am pretty good with my money, beyond a few slip ups. Since I graduated university and have almost entirely paid off my last loan I am getting a little lenient on saving, especially since Christmas and LP season. I am struggling to get back on the saving train. I keep finding excuses to spend money but as off last week I think I finally got on board and so far so good.

And this is me >>8076439
Would also like so anon support friends too if anyone's interested!

Not so much of an emotional buyer myself, but I honestly spend way too much time (all day) stalking LM, LSE, LSW, EGL comm sales, Closet Child, Lolita Desu, etc. trying to find clothes that I really want. Now that I have money from Christmas and my birthday, I'm pretty much just browsing those sites on my laptop or phone. I haven't bought anything on impulse yet, just searching for any highly wanted clothes/accessories/dream dresses.

But there were a few times where I feel really excited or happy for some reason and I was super close on buying a dress that wasn't on my wishlist, thinking, "omg this would look totes cute on me."

>be me
>student, still living at home so no bills
>earn ~$300 -$500 each month
>spend every single penny on Lolita, clothes, make up, books, eating out and other luxury items
>zero savings

I just can't. I am currently trying to save up for a vacation and several big conventions but already spend all my Christmas money during my christmas trip. Planned on saving everything that was left plus what I made from sales; already spent all of it on small Boyline/ebay orders, burando sales and at a swap meet up because "everything is so cheap!" I don't really regret what I bought but rather that I bought anything at all.

Anyone else doing this?

I don't have a shopping addiction, but I have no friends and I'm lonely and my quality of life right now ranges from "okay" to "poor" depending on things like health and stress, so shopping for cute stuff is the only thing that really makes me feel good and purposeful right now. Trying to make everything in my life cute and happy makes me feel good. I don't mindlessly blow my money away, in fact I rarely splurge, but I spend at least two to four hours every night either window shopping or looking up ideas on how to make my room cuter or whatever and I am having trouble breaking the habit because that's the only thing that I have to dream about right now.

>>8077955
>earn ~$300 -$500 each month
>spend every single penny on Lolita, clothes, make up, books, eating out and other luxury items
>zero savings
Are you me? I know in my final year I'm going to have to start saving for a deposit on a flat once I've left university (might not be able to get a job for 6 months so I need a cushion), but I'm only in my second year and it's just spend spend spend.

I'm afraid I might be developing a shopping addiction. I've bought seven main pieces and two taobao hauls in the past two months. I'm telling myself that after this most recent dress, this is it for a while, I'm not allowed to spend anything else until the summer and until I've worn everything I've bought so far. I'm only allowed to buy something if it's either ridiculously cheap and something I need OR a dream dress that you literally never see pop up second hand.

I usually have such awful buyer's remorse that I very rarely buy myself anything, but I've found that I've never regretted a single purchase when it comes to lolita. At first, I thought that was a good thing and really loved being able to just enjoy the clothes and spoiling myself a little, but now.... I'm going to do my best to abstain.

I'm starting to believe I may have a shopping addiction. I've been dropping money like crazy the last few months. I'll probably buy Meta's re-release of Vintage Cameo and then clamp down for a while. At least I have good tastes.

Luckily my net worth above $250,000 so I won't be going into debt anytime soon.

>>8076138
I'm a guy but I do have one.

I never spent all that much money on my gf since she didn't have any kind of expensive hobby, but ever since she got into lolita and cosplay I haven't been able to stop buying her dresses and shoes and shit. Kinda annoying how she sent a lot of stuff back to get me my money back, but she's starting to warm up to it.

>>8078283
I'm not you but I feel you, Anon. I need to save money for shit like renting a flat/finding a job/buying furniture/et cetera, yet I spend it all on frilly clothes and luxury stuff like fancy cocktails or eating out. I'm already at the point were my parents are really annoyed with me (obviously) but I can't help myself. Almost everyhting's shitty in my life right now, uni sucks, so do my grades, I failed several classes, tfw no bf, gained weight, deep into winter depression - buying some nice clothes and attending meet ups are some of the very few moments I actually look forward to.

At least I'm a Eurofag so I won't be in debt due to college but that's about the only positive thing regarding my financial situation...

>>8076266
yeah, I got like at least $2000 on my credit card bill that will accrue interest over time since I can't pay it off right away...

>>8077955
you are me

I was raised shopping for everything at thrift stores so I much prefer to wait a little longer for that great deal and know that $80 for a bolero with a little bit of ruffle is ridiculous. I know some things like dresses and skirts for lolita pretty much have to come from some kind of brand because few other places make that kind of silhouette. However the rest of my wardrobe is a lot of carefully selected thrift/consignment items like heeled oxfords, boleros and poofy sleeved blouses. I guess it helps that I stick with classical/goth and I live in a big city and know where the upper class drops off their stuff.

>>8078322
I don't spend on luxuries like eating out, at least. And I don't drink. But I spend way more than I should on online shopping.

I read somewhere that shopping reduces stress for some people, thereby preventing heart problems.

>I-I don't have a shopping addiction, I'm just combatting heart disease!

I'll never admit it in real life but I know deep down I can't stop.

I get overwhelming guilt whenever I buy anything for myself, so I don't think is a problem I will develop. The overwhelming guilt thing is a problem too, though.

>>8078474
I like how you think.

I have a terrible shopping addiction. I spend money as a coping mechanism. I've done it since I was young. my dad would always take me shopping or throw money at me if I felt the tiniest bit depressed. I spent all of the money I set aside for Christmas gifts last year on myself. The behavior is a really awful cycle, I get hung up on whatever is missing in my life, spend money on it, feel ok for a second, then move on to the next imagined hang up. I believe I need or I want things so bad I cry about them if I don't get them right away. I promised myself I would break the cycle this year. I'm doing okay so far, I haven't bought anything since late december. It hurts so bad though. with my birthday coming up I need to try extra hard to stay strong. And to not be hurt or resentful when I don't get anything I want for my birthday. It sounds so wrong and selfish but when people get me things I don't want or need, I wish they wouldn't get me anything at all. It just gives me another reason to shop, to make up for it. I'm considering asking everyone to donate to a charity if they feel they want to get me a gift--I don't have to feel upset or secondhand buyer's remorse and everyone else wins too.