/cgl/ - Cosplay & EGL

What was >>7872003 all about?

Idk how relevant this is, but I'm looking to find the Dallas/Ft Worth lolitas if there are any active? google gave me ancient LJ links when I looked for a comm, but I'm going to be visiting the area between the 31st and 4th and wanted to meet some out of state lolitas!

Idk how relevant this is, but I'm looking to find the Dallas/Ft Worth lolitas if there are any active? google gave me ancient LJ links when I looked for a comm, but I'm going to be visiting the area between the 31st and 4th and wanted to meet some out of state lolitas!

>>7871634→ #
To be fair, she is said to be a chronic liar

>>7872222
John is rumored to have molested some girls before, it's also said that this is why baby and Aatp won't come back. Just what I heard from other HLC girlsat meets but yeah, john doesn't seem like a good guy

>>7872269
Why is he still allowed to go if there are allegstions against him?

>>7872273
He...owns AM?

>>7872265
What?

>>7872279
An anime convention. Nothing to do with lolita.

So the LA comm is having a Halloween party, but it's sweet themed. I was hoping to go, but alas, there isn't a single sweet piece in my closet, it's all mainly gothic and classic. While the girls I met were super encouraging and said only the staff had to be in sweet, I'm a little scared of being that one shmo ruining everyone's carefully sweet coordinated photos with my dark colors. Should I wait until the next FB meet in LA and check out the San Diego Halloween meet instead? Again, the comm has been nothing but encouraging, I just wouldn't want to be a party pooper by clashing against the theme and aesthetic they've set up. And I have scoured my closet, but there are no prints save for florals and the errant IW themed florals, and everything I have is in solid jewel tones. Should I just wait until the next meet?

>>7872286
You might want to catch up on HLC drama from the past two months anon

>>7872301
Where? I never saw anything about her.

>>7872299
If money isn't an option buy a coordinate really quick? Otherwise post on the event wall to see if your outfit is ok with host and everyone else.

>>7872269
Figured Baby/Aatp isn't coming back because AM wanted Angelic Pretty? We all know those two won't work together because competition.

>>7872301
She wasn't involved? She's been in Sweden or something.

>>7872459
>72459▶
>>>7872301
I think anon meant John drama

>>7872373
Nah, they def wanted baby. John just fucked up

>>7872235
The Metroplex Lolitas have a facebook group, you can find it real easily on there.

>>7872501
thank you, I'll message one of the mods now!

>>7872469
Who wanted a baby?

>>7872657
I'm not sure if sarcasm or real confusion

>>7872299
Nobody cares what you're gonna wear I assure you, I myself won't be in sweet lolita. Plus a lot of girls like to pull out their gothier coords for halloween and a particular member never wears anything BUT gothic and she'll be there. Don't stress about it man. Dress in whatever you had planned

>>7872660
Who had John's baby? Lauren? Lilith?

>>>7872860
wtf...

>>7872877
What is hard to understand about their post? He's a fucking menace and I would 100% sign the petition. He can go circlejerk with his sissy friends about it

>>7872884
I am going to make a petition. Thinking of paraphrasing >>7872860 and adding in testimonials from BtB. Anyone want to help write the description or add anything to this?

>>7872914
Just add this image.

>>7872921
> 4. We fight
lolitaslaughing.jpg

How is he this delusional? Holy shit.

>>7872914
Anon, if you make a petition, I will totally sign it.

Melissa sounds like another brolitajenny minus the creepy videos. How can anyone be ok with that? How can you just tip toe around that and dismiss it because ~oh, I'm not transphobic~?

>>7872950
This. Why was the entire community online vehemently against brolitajenny but with Melissa it's a "oh you're a transphobic asshole"? Melissa is exposed as a sissy and people are all "so what everyone has kinks!"

SJW have gone too far.

>>7872955
*online community

>>7872235

Speaking of that com, I haven't attended a meet in 9 months (mostly work schedule, but also because it was awful). Are they any less shitty? 'Cause I'm kinda done with the whole "it's my birthday let's have a lolita meet" idea, malls, and general "we came here for culture, but really, let's just talk lolita and then get pissed when people want to take pictures" museum/culture event meets.

While there may be a few good outfits here and there, this com dresses terribly. Idk if it's just because the anime community in DFW is shitty and that spilled over, but why can't this city get it together?! I don't know if the girls who ran the lolita panel at A-kon are actually in the Metroplex group, but they had no idea what they were talking about either.

My comm's two local catty bitches are trying to bitch out our local comm leaders again. They finally left the comm a few months ago and it looks like they feel like starting shit again. I wish they would just ban them and get it over with.

Did anon find the deets about Phil from San Francisco?

Has anyone else noticed that some major drama llamas in the AZ comm have gotten really fucking quiet since all the BTB and cgl smears have started in full force? Like Sandra, Divina, Samantha, Kat... makes you wonder if at least a couple of them aren't just trying to lay low to deflect attention from themselves while they shit on other girls.

>>7872977
You haven't been active in the comm in nine months yet you're already ragging on them? There are a good 50 who circle about attending meets and maybe 10 are new or ita. Prove you dress nice and show up to another meet then.

I think September was the only real time the comm had a ton of birthday meets, but if you have a problem with the meets propose a different one? There's been a ton of variety in them outside of mall meets and museum meets, like the tea party events, cafe get-togethers, and I thought the boat tour was a pretty neat event even with it being a birthday event. I really don't see the shittiness in the comm tbf, they just get creative and don't stick to cookie-cutter traditions and I actually admire that variety.

I didn't go to a-kon though, were the panels that bad?

>>7872269
Like he seems like a piece of shit, but how many situations would you be in with him alone, or is he molesting girls in front of a group of people? Only reason there is disbelief.

http://www.petitions24.com/kick_melissa

You may want to sign this if you support it.

>>7873105
Might be a better idea to change all the "she/her/s" to "he/his/him" since he's not transgender and all.

On the topic of the SF comm, this girl is such a wreck. "Wahh cater to my needs!!!!!"
Her face scares me.

>>7873105
Yes I have realised this, thanks for reminding me :).
>>7873034
No I did not. I have gone through the first 35 secrets posts and the secret was not there. It is a picture of a bread roll shaped like a bunny rabbit. If you would continue that would be awesome!

>>7873209
How cringeworthy, somebodies priorities need help, not to mention she pretty much says she's being intentionally left out.

>>7873241
Phil is often associated with bunnies and rabbits because he has a fetish for them iirc

>>7873209
Esp since the girl she is namedropping is amazingly friendly and sweet.

>>7873046
If you could ever even consider Sandra apart of the comm. She went to what, 3 meets? 1 con? She shit talked everyone including her "friends" and flounced because no one gave a shit about her rare and elusive pieces that she could only hold on to for a week at a time because she couldn't pay her bills, and no one kissed her ass, and her "friends" finally started to see through her bullshit and stopped caring.

Divina is a fucking ita. Always has been, always will be. Her and Kat are really fucking irrelevant because they never show their faces without each other because nobody likes them except for themselves, which like Sandra, is hilarious, because they talk mad shit about each other to anybody who will listen.

Samantha is pretty fucking irrelevant as well for all the above reasons. She never participates in the comm, and when she does, its under anon, otherwise nobody would give a shit if they knew it was coming from her. She's rubbed so many people the wrong way or fucked them over, that everyone just ignores her anyways. The most recent lolita drama i even know about is her attending the cgl meet at sabo, and just fucking standing there with her buds like a fucking loser. And bumping somebody off of her panel group without saying anything just so she could get her uggo boyfriend into the con for free. I guess there was all that shit with Arizona Pretty, but that's too much to even get into.

>>7873105
Signed. I hope he sees this and quits.

>>7873034
I didn't find it, sorry.

>>7873008
Are you talking about Stevie and Colleen?

>>7872299
Gothic would be totally fine, the themes for FB meets aren't strict, and no one will give you a hard time about it.

SD group is pretty chill, though, so if you want to check out a smaller meet, I'd do theirs. Or both?

there's a girl in my comm who has this incredibly hot and nice boyfriend that she brought to the last meet and he is sooo out of her league. like it's gross almost that she's this fat fuck with like a 4/10 face and he is easily a 9/10 i seriously dont get it. im pretty sure she goes on cgl too so i'm not going to name my comm just in case i just dont even know whats going on there at all

>>7873448
Don't pretend we don't know who you are just because you dropped your trip to post this. Be happy with what you have and stop being so thirsty.

>>7872921
I'm not even part of this comm, but this is definitely not OK. This is a grown man threatening physical violence toward a young woman. How is he still even allowed near your meets?

>>7873209
dat 5 o'clock shadow...

>>7873209
She's probably going to whiteknight Melissa too, since she urged the hostess to include Melissa in the RSVP list without paying first.

>>7873465
Its SFs "lets accept everyone" attitude that let this go on for as long as it has. So long as he's done nothing YET they wont do anything about it. Its unfortunate. All these red flags.

>>7873470

>>7873494
I feel ill.

>>7873470
She's cute otherwise, though. She isn't trans, as far as I know. She sometimes posts pictures of herself as a kid on Facebook. I think she just has unfortunate genes.

>>7873470
Honestly? She looks cute, if shes latina she might have slightly more prominent facial she chooses to shave or its her make up. Ive had a foundation that gave me a strangely grayish upperlip. Who knows. Doesn't excuse her behavior though.

>>7873209
Which group is this in? I can't seem to find the post.

>>7872673
Agreeing with this anon. No sweet necessary at all, and in fact the theme is "spooky sweet" anyway! Wear whatever the hell you want. I already know about 4 girls who will be "witchy" in some way, and I assure you they won't be in pastels.

>>7873494

>>7873034
http://behind-the-bows.livejournal.com/24874.html
Secret #2. I did it! Will upload the story right now.

Hey Everyone,

I've decided it is time to speak out about Phil and clear up all these rumors going around. If you don't know me my name is Fabienne and I worked at BABY SF for the last two years. Now that I am no longer a shop staff I feel even more of a need to get this out to everyone in the Lolita Community. Please keep in mind that I no longer work at the shop, All of the opinions are my own, not the shops. I'm just stating the facts as a member from the community.

When I first started at BABY SF in 2010 Phil was a pretty good customer. He would buy things for a girl he had met several years prior at a convention who lived in the Netherlands. I remember him bringing a picture of her in and we would help him pick out accessories that would match or something that would suit her well. After shopping he usually would talk to us about his day etc. before leaving. Like many people in the Lolita community, we thought Phil was just a lonely man and was completely harmless.

As thank you for helping him pick out clothes for the girl in the Netherlands, Phil would sometimes stop by and give us small gifts. It was always some cute candy, or Asian sweet, like the bunny cake in his profile picture, and the shop staff would share it amongst us. Because Baby is a Japanese company, Phil is Japanese, and in the Japanese shops the stores receive small gifts quite often from loyal customers, we were ok with these gifts.

We would also let Phil take pictures of what we were wearing, outside of the shop just like we do for anyone who asks. He would always ask us first and would never bother us if a customer was in the store or we were busy with something. I friend all the Lolitas and customers who seek me out of Facebook and since Phil would upload the pictures he took of us and other Lolitas would tag me in it, Phil found me on Facebook and I accepted his Friends request so I could get those pictures.

>>7873549
When convention season started in about Spring 2011, Phil would attend cons to take pictures. The shop staff always couldn't go because of work. He started bringing us all souvenirs from the cons he went to. Usually we got cupcake necklaces or small handmade hair accessories. This we again didn't mind because the Japanese stores also receive gifts like this from customers, all of us where receiving one, they where small cheap things, and he was buying from local artists who where in the Lolita community. However, at this time he had stopped buying items for the girl in the Netherlands. All of his money was going to attending conventions.

But at the Elevenses tea party, he managed to scrounge up the money to get an item and a ticket. He was very awkward at this party. Usually he would ask for pictures so people could pose. At Elevenses he didn't. There are lots of pictures floating around to girls in the middle of eating or texting on their phones.

After con season Phil would stop by the store more frequently. He would come in and tell us about his lousy day and would say "But the girls at Baby always brighten my day." One week she showed up all 7 days, and he didn't buy anything.

I exercise a lot. I have an app on my phone that posts to FB about how much I ran that day and how many calories I burned. One day I posted my workout and mentioned that "My feet hurt really badly after a few minutes of running. Does anyone else have this problem? Should I get new shoes?" A few seconds later Phil responds with a huge chuck of text. Apparently Phil used to be a Podiatrist, a foot doctor. He sent me several pictures of a foot in a matter of seconds, asking be what part of my foot hurts and explaining what it could be. I didn't respond as fast as he was operating. Then he said, "I'll just come into the store tomorrow." I still don't know how he knew I had work the next day.

>>7873550
The next day I am the only one working in the shop. Phil comes in, says hi, and before I can say hi back or even know what has happened, he has gotten down to his knee and has grabbed a hold of my foot. Now Phil walks with a cane and because of all his camera gear and whatever his injury is he moves very slowly. This was the fastest I have ever seen Phil move. He proceeds to touch my foot (I still had my shoe and sock on. He get his fingers between my shoe) and lets go and says my foot isn't broken. He trys to touch it again and I move myself behind the store counter very obviously uncomfortable and say "Thank you. But I'm ok. I just need new running shoes." He says that it is just because I have high arches and if he could properly examine my foot he could tell me what kind of insoles I need. I say “No. That’s ok. Thank you but I'll go look for some before I go running again." The next day I work he brings me insoles.

I was very uncomfortable by this event and so was my coworker. I decide to block Phil from seeing my status updates to prevent a situation like this from happening again. I did not completely block him because even though he hasn't purchased items as much as he used to he is still a customer and I didn't want an awkward situation in the shop of him asking me why I wasn't his FB friend anymore.

>>7873552
In October 2011 Phil had come into the shop almost every day, talking to us about how bad his health is, problems at home, and how people who he thought where friends weren't talking to him anymore. Now if you are friends with me on FB I always post about really cool accessories and clothes that come out. Its not always Lolita, some times its normal stuff. And since I blocked Phil from seeing my posts I was more chill with posting stuff. I posted a Betsy Johnson ring and not long after I post it Phil has written "Well that is what I'm getting you for Christmas." I found out that even though I have blocked Phil from seeing my status, If anyone who is mutual friends with Phil and Likes or comments on my post, Phil can see that they like it and then view and comment on my status. I replied "I am very flattered but I can't not except that gift. It is inappropriate to buy me jewelry. I will have to ask that you do not buy me anymore gifts." The next day he replied saying " Its to late. I already bought it and I can't return it. I'll just have to give it to you." After that I removed Phil more my friends list and blocked him from seeing my FB page.

>>7873553
Soon after on a day I wasn't working Phil came in to talk and stayed a lot longer then usual. After Phil had been in the store for a few hours a Lolita comes in on her own. Before the shop staff on duty could greet her Phil has approached her. Phil knew her name so the shop staff thought they where acquainted with each other. The girl doesn't get the chance to shop because Phil was talking to her. He said that because of a status update on her facebook he knew she was sick and brought her cold medicine. He also saw that her birthday was that day and asked her for her phone number so he could meet up with her and give her a birthday gift. She gave it to him, very freely like it was ok. When Phil left the girl approached the shop staff very distraught and uncomfortable. The girl said she had never meet Phil before. That she only friended him because they had many mutual friends, gave him her number because she was frightened and didn't know what else to do, and that she was a minor.

costumers and staff (for the girls safety we did not name her) he could no longer attend BABY events and could only come in the store if he was going to purchase something, and could not linger in the store for much after.

Phil seemed to have ignored the email entirely. The next day he came in. I wasn't working, but from what I was told, He came up to the counter and started talking to the shop staff, they asked him if he needed help finding anything. He said no. Then my coworker informed him about the email and its contents.

However this still didn't stop Phil. The next week he came in with someone that is a good customer at the store. He talked about buying a simple dress for himself. He said he wasn't allowed to go to the AP Anniversary party because you have to wear the clothes. He said that also must be why he wasn't allowed to Baby events either and wanted to find something to wear so he wont miss any chances to take pictures.

The next day he came in one of my coworkers was helping out a customer with larger items and explaining the sizing. Phil interrupts the conversation correcting my coworker saying that was not how the sizing works. That she was wrong and was a poor sales person because of it and scared the customer out of the store. At that point Phil was banned from the shop.

After finding out about Phil being banned, someone had a background check done on him. That is when it was discovered that he had 2 restraining orders filled against him. The restraining orders were from 2 female patients of his, both filed around the same time. Because of the restraining orders he had his doctorate taken from him and is no longer allowed to practice Podiatry.

I must admit, I wish I was more aggressive with telling Phil and Baby how uncomfortable I was and I feel that this whole thing escalated so high because I didn't act quicker and more aggressively. Along with many of the girls in the community I thought Phil was harmless and just a lonely sad old man. And my view of him was slow to changed even when he was being so aggressive with giving me the ring, telling him I didn't want it and insisting he gives it to me. Not to mention the physical harassment of him touching me. I was very scared for myself, my coworkers and customers in the store.

I know there are people in the community who are friends with him. I am not trying to convince you not be or pick a side. I just want the whole story out, I want everyone to be safe, and not have something escalate so you are in fear of a person. Phil was the first person they have banned from the store and I feel that Baby has learned to respond more aggressively toward these situations. Baby has banned other people from the store for harassing its employees and customers, If you ever are having an Issue with someone harassing you, remember Baby and the New People building is a safe place and they do not tolerate harassment or stalking of any kind.

>>7873549
>>7873550
>>7873552
>>7873553
>>7873555
>>7873556

All done! Sorry some were so short, I hit the word limit and didn't want to break up any paragraphs.

>>7873556
Just finished reading.
Holy shit. I met him at a meet and I didn't think he was that creepy at all. Just acted like a normalish dude. I'll be sure to beware of him. I know that he's friends with Lynda so there's no way he's going to get banned from the AP store, unfortunately. I wonder if he goes in there and creeps girls out, too?

Wowie, I didn't know all this about Phil and reading about Melissa in the secrets and other threads. This feels like a bad time to join the SF comm, is there an FB comm? I'm constantly traveling between nor and socal.

>>7873573
It's called San Francisco Bay Area Gothic and Lolita EGL

>>7873556
Holy fuck

If you still here I was wondering if you ever heard of the staff at Baby's being mean to bigger costumers. If you know any of the current staff and have they ever been mean or outright calling them fat.

I'm just doubting the story told here a few days ago about a bigger would be Lolita.

>>7872871
Wtf.

>>7873617
I am not the store worker, I just copied from BtB what she said. I have never known brand staff. I have definetely heard that the BTSSB SF staff are quite snobby, but I feel like often people are more conscious of their own size than others, so if someone makes an offhand comment it can seem like a personal insult. In >>7873556 you can see That they do help larger girls with sizing.
I do not know if the girls story is exaggerated, but it may not be and this is just how she interpreted it. They may have actually been trying to help her and prevent her from wasting her time. However if someone told you you were too large to fit into their clothing items I feel like you would be offended, not thankful that they stopped you from wasting time looking at clothes that wouldn't fit. So it needs to be taken from multiple opinionated perspectives to really understand what happened.

anyone knows if the london/england community is very active? do they go by a fb page or a livejournal community? i'm thinking of going to the MCM expo so i don't know if there will be any meets there but i was curious.

>>7872218
what if cgl had jackets like that

>>7873076
No one has ever seen him do it.

>>7873717
he did tho

>>7873722
The main word to focus on is "seen".
Not saying he hasn't or has, just pointing out that no one has 2nd party witness, or proof

>>7873549
Maybe a bit random, but does anyone know who this girl in the Netherlands was?

>>7873723
>he harassed girls
>but have you seen him do it
>a couple girls have brought it to attention
>but have you seen it
It's obvious it's been seen, but coming forward on it can be nerve wracking.

>>7873728
I'm really curious too as a Dutch lolita

>>7873758

Me too, super curious.

>>7873758
>>7873774

Another very curious Dutch anon. I heardthe story before but never found out which Dutch lolita it was

>>7873733
Trying not to blame the possible victims, but if no one won't speak up not on anon or in secret, can anything really be done?

>>7873809
Exactly. All this accusing people of being liars and crazy is ridiculous. Sorry if criticizing John will mean that he wont pick you for his special meets.

>>7873809
This is the first time I'm hearing this rumor and I've been keeping up with HLC drama. John sounds like a scumbag, but not a molester.

>>7872977
LOL you have a sandy vagina just because nobody gave you the attention you wanted...

Go complain somewhere else

>>7873650
I don't know what the staff was like a few years ago, but they are helpful if you ask for help. They don't hover around customers or try to act kawaii or anything, but they're not rude.

>>7873809
>>7873870
Sounds like a typical crazy hlc member buttmad because John didn't pick her to be a model or something.

>>7873008
Is this about Colleen and Stevie? Stay as far away from them as possible...
They still won't leave ATL Comm alone. They are in an ATL side comm, still. I feel so bad for her ex... still having to put up with them.
>Not to mention the AWA drama

>>7872977

What exactly is there to do in DFW aside from museums and culture events? Tearooms become tiresome imo.
I'm curious, what is your idea of a "non-shitty" meet?

I find the birthday meets really cute, there's nothing wrong with wanting to celebrate with your comm.

>>7873982
in my experience, only one of the shop girls is useful and has good customer service skills. there's also a white girl who always has a weird face on and acts awkward as fuck, but seems nice online? it just seems like some of them lack the skills necessary for retail

>>7874232
I wonder how hard or easy it is to get a job there if you're a decent lolita, actually? Do they require experience?

>>7874233
i'm not sure.. three of the girls i'd say are pretty decent lolitas, one of the girls is sort of ita. she just slaps brand sets on her. some of the girls just dont know how to properly socialize with their customers. sometimes you dont even get greeted in. i've gotten weird looks from asking questions such as if a certain item is in stock..

How2 get hired at btssb
Do you just stroll in and ask for a application like normal or what?

>>7873477

>>7874206
What happened at AWA?

>>7873549
>>7873550
>>7873552
>>7873553
>>7873555
>>7873556
This is honestly really frightening.
Fuck I wonder why comms are so passive about this. People like him and Melissa should definitely be banned.

>>7874143
Sounds like HLC don't want to speak out/be seen to support victims in case they don't get picked as models.

>>7874214
I want another laser tag meet. I didn't join the comm until after and I know it would be tricky in pastels but it sounds fun!

>>7874413
Well there's a petition to get Melissa banned. I doubt it'll do much, but it's a start.

>>7874515
It seems from >>7873970 that there is some progress on Melissa's banning so it's highly probable to get Phil banned too.

>>7874381
Colleen proposed to Stevie... and she dressed Stevie up as her ex-fiancée, who was at the con. The one Colleen is obsessed with from ATL, Holly.

>Same hair color and length, which is a rare color to find in a wig
>Same glasses shape
>Both wearing crowns
>Both have scepters/canes (Holly is disabled)
>Same dress that Colleen had once bought for Holly.
>Both wearing same pink x gold x white color scheme.
>Holly is known as the "unicorn girl", as most of her co-ords are known for incorporating unicorns.
>Stevie's co-ord was a direct copy of Holly's style.

I thought Stevie was Holly, until she turned around. Freaked me out. They also both bad-mouthed Holly and Atl to anyone who would listen... and to the Atl comm themselves, she tried to recruit members for their fashion show.

Deets on the fashion show?

>>7873209
Ah god. This girl. I don't have a very good feeling about her. Don't let the pictures fool you, she's REALLY not that cute IRL.


She's trying to plan a Japan trip with the other lolitas here in 2016, but I really don't want it to happen. She wants to go solely for Harajuku and she idolizes the lolita culture. I don't know about you, but I am not flying 12 hours to look for Rinrin Doll or Misako, thanks.

>>7874536
Ha, Harajuku's boring as hell now and the only thing there are tourists trying to get a glimpse of that elusive "gothic lolita" Lonely Planet said they'll see.

>>7874536
Now she's white knighting Melissa as the previous anon predicted...is she really that dense?

>>7874431
Everyone involved in AM or want to be involved are just enabling his fucked up behavior. I'm not even from Houston and I can see that.

>>7872218
Holy shit I thought the one with the red hair was Traci Hines

>>7874793
That's Frenchie, you pleb.

>>7874693
Tell me about it. "So. . .basically you want to ban Melissa because they wore casual clothes to AP?" No you stupid cunt, do you not see all the other fucking reasons as to why? I am super mad, the admin and dense cunts like her are the reason why Melissa isnt banned and makes others uncomfortable to speak up.

>>7873982
I know this is about BTSSB SF but since Paris was mentioned in the previous thread I'll mention my experience. I'm quite plus sized and was a bit larger still when I visited the Paris store. (About a US size 20, clearly too large to fit anything but the fully shirred dresses.) While I was there I found a blouse with shirring and asked to try it on. The staff was very friendly and had no problem with me doing so. (It was a bit too small but as I was losing weight I bought it anyway to use as thinspiration - I've since lost enough weight to wear it even though I could stand to lose more for it to really fit properly.) I was wearing normalfag clothes too though since I was explaining some of the stuff in the store to my equally normalfag companion, maybe they could tell I wasn't some pleb off the street.

>>7873704
Check the tea party club on facebook.

The Tumblr is strong in my comm. every time I turn around there's some new girl claiming herself as some new and exotic sexuality.

>>7874891
I've always wondered what motivates this discussion of sexualities in a group, particularly if you're not all really good friends. We have a handful of girls who are known to be lesbians, and the comm only knows of it because two are dating one another, and the third dresses her girlfriend up for meets sometimes.

Everyone else, who knows. Unless someone is living with their boyfriend/partner and brings them to meets, it rarely comes up in discussion. I didn't even know one of the girls has a boyfriend until he dropped something off at a picnic earlier this year, and I've known her for two years now.

For all I know, half of the comm could be having bisexual orgies once a month, because it's just not discussed.

>>7874900
That sounds nice, my comm make sexuality-based jokes every five minutes and whilst I'd probably support people that were strictly into dinosaurs (of a consenting age and sentience) I'm just too old fashioned to want to hear about it every single meet.
>I'm sorry why is your dildo as relevant in this discussion as DDC?

>>7874950
Did someone really bring up their dildo into a conversation? If so, that's just crazy. And I thought it was weird when I met one of the new members of my comm and he told me he was transgender before he said what his name was.

>>7875082
We bring up sex and dicks and all sorts of things during meet ups but it's only when it's a group of us who will laugh our asses off over it. And never around minors.

I think some people are just super delicate flowers who don't want their brand to overhear dirty words.

>not posting snaps

Is Melissa taking this well.

>>7875082
How does that work out
>walks up
>holds out hand
>I'm transgendered
>...that's swell?

>>7875096
God I wish I could laugh my ass off about dildos and shit. But it feels like I'm the only girl in my comm who has a healthy relationship with the d.

>>7875104
Exactly like you said. Also he apparently didn't know how to un-bunch a petticoat or to not wear a dark blue sports bra underneath a light colored Bodyline cutsew.

>>7874534
>what the absolute fuck

why

>>7874534
>reading through this again, that's really terrible harassment
>seriously, what the fuck

can't they be banned from cons or something for pulling shit like this? isn't that borderline stalking/emotional abuse, in a way?

WE DID IT!

>>7875159
I just saw this!!

>>7875159
Holy shit, you guys actually got rid of Melissa?? Good job!

>>7875159
Sweet sweet victory.

>>7875159
Holy shit, this is great.

jpop summit incident from involved party. Bless this ban.

>>7875159
It says the member is banned for now which means the member will be able to come back soon.

I want to see his tears! And those of his accomplices.

>>7875184
it says from now, probably meaning from now on they are banned.

>>7875126
The FGAS is strong in this one

>>7875159
It seems like a few SF lolitas are here soo... I guess we can anonymously vent about this situation?

I'm really glad Melissa was banned but a couple responese really irked me and makes me think twice about some of the lolitas.

This girl went to tell the OP of the post that Melissa just said empty words. I felt it was like she was victim blaming here... And then with the new pinned notice she quickly changes her mind and says "oh yes this person has a history of violence we need to be very very careful"

idk maybe I'm just on edge because of how long it's taken and I'm slightly bitter that I had to feel safe in my own community for so long

Now we can just ban Phil and the comm will be golden.

>>7875196
andd here is the OP post. I'm really really happy he's gone because of this

Wtf this is wrong. How is she a mod now.

>>7875196
I sort of have to agree. Melissa's ban was unjust especially since that statue of limitations concerning the incident had passed over a year ago.

>>7875183
Shaf should have said something to the mods immediately after what had transpired, not a year after.

>>7875217
>If you were not comfortable in any situation, please protect and remove yourself from the scene. This Facebook group and admins have no control, not involve and do not provide solution of all kinds of issue or drama happened in this group or during events.

If it wasn't for this post Shaf would never come forward.

>>7875224
would have never*

>>7875183
you should block out shaf's name

I scared of what he'll do now.

>>7875213
Agreed. /cgl/ is full of transphobia and fat shaming. I mean boys who dress up in JSKs and tea parties aren't really appreciated here. They are mocked and insulted from Devon to Manasamatemple.

>>7875225
>says block out name
> Uses persons name

>>7875227
Melissa isn't trans. He's a sissy.

>>7875226
Yeah, especially knowing now that he's a gun nut and could be carrying a gun around.

>>7875229
sorry if i was unclear. you should block out shaf's last name*

I thought it was common courtesy to not use people's full names on here? especially since she is the one who was the target of the threat?

just blocked out the whole name.

>>7875232
WHAT? Seriously?!

jfc SF we need new mods.

>>7875226
Does he have any true friends in the SF Comm?

>>7875232
Good lord, that would be bad. :(

>>7875232
Now I am frightened.

>>7875213
Not saying that mods should be at the front of the battle during a war, but don't put authority on yourself and then say you don't want to take responsibility when the threat is focused away from the original victim onto yourself. What a fucking hypocrite.

>Melissa threatens to beat up someone in the comm
>"Guys, it's because she was bullied."
>Melissa could now threaten to beat you up because you told him he's banned
>"Guys, I'm afraid of being targeted."

>>7875159
Congrats, SF ladies! I hope you have more fun at meet-ups and that anyone who was hesitant about attending isn't anymore.

I think it will communicate a strong message if suddenly a lot of people show up to the coming meet-ups, and hopefully it will assure the admins/mods that they made the right decision. I'd hate for them to go back on their word because of a few people crying "transphobia!/gender discrimination!" and "bullying!" or whatever silly thing that could reverse this glorious turn of events.

Melissa could still go to the Sacramento Comm for events now. I would be concerned if I was from Sacramento.

So wait. Did the mods just, remove and ban Melissa without sending him some kind of message letting him know about the actions that caused him to be banned?

>>7875249
I remember him going to Santa Rosa Lolita meets in the past, so I'm hopefully he'll go back there.

>>7875227
I've never seen anyone post anything bad about Manasamatemple, she looks great.

>>7875244
Definitely agree. Suddenly now that he's banned everyone has gone wishy washy? Like what the actual fuck. He definitely needed to be banned! This went way beyond the superficial "he can't dress himself" "awful makeup" "ugh so ita".

>>7875250
>>7875244
THIS. I've been active in the SF community for almost 4 years and I have never met or seen these so called mods or even knew they were our moderators. While we did make a move in the right direction, I feel like were also taking two steps backwards with how the final verdict was presented. I am infuriated that Shaf and Chen had to deal with this in silence and I am angry that the mods belittled their horrifying encounter with Melissa. The pinned post was very underwhelming and their responses to being fearful of their own lives just makes me laugh. If you wanted to take the reign of the Ban Melissa petition and refuse to let the entire community decide for you (sounds a little power hungry to me) then fucking man up and stand by your decision to your entire community. Them saying theyre scared now (what, and Shaf and Chen shouldn't have been?) only makes the other lolitas regret what they have said on a public forum.

What the fuck.

>>7875246
We could see some fallout and drama from this. There might be people who will be upset by this ban and take some rage on the mods.

>>7875249
>>7875253
These Comms need to heed the recent ban by the SF Comm and do that same too. I would be worried about the Sacramento Comm.

>>7875262
If the mods don't stand by their decision that's not only shitty but sets a bad example and will lead others like Melissa to believe they don't truly have consequences to being an ass.

>>7875213
"gender orientation" isn't even a fucking real term. gender and sexuality are very different things.

>>7875250
The more I'm reading the pinned post, the more I'm thinking this is true. They just removed Melissa from the group without further explanation.

>>7875234
Thank you. I remember this incident from BtB and I'm sad it didn't get as much attention as it should have - it would have removed Melissa early and prevented a lot of drama.

>>7872235

i saw your post! :( i'm afraid i'm busy then, though. good luck though!

>>7875286
The mods just read this thread, and said that they sent a message to MB about the ban.

>>7875315
You mean this one?

>>7875159
Can we talk about how hard it was to not tell this girl how fucking stupid she is?

>>7875335
No, it was a picture of Melissa walking around at JPop. Let me see if I can find it

>>7875344
She comes off as one of those "lolitas are supposed to be lovelies" newbs. We're not going to keep coddling someone who threatens and hurls abuse at comm members for the sake of being inclusive and nice just because that person didn't actually punch someone in the face like they threatened to. Maybe if Melissa actually admitted they were wrong and apologized, but that is clearly not the case.

>>7875261
Well, one person got made a mod just today, and she has been in the comm for a long time but not very active. I feel like we should appoint some more anyway, because there are definitely some other members who are a little more active, and I think it would make things fairer, as well.

>>7875353

>>7875235
>>7875243
Well to be make things clear, someone had mentioned in the discussion talking about how Melissa had gotten angry at her for supporting gun control laws and said she was the reason he was pro-gun or something.

Which of course, doesn't make me less frightened, but yeah

>>7875261
Personally, I don't really think they "belittled" their situation, though I do agree they should've been more decisive and straightforward/clear with their actions. I guess since the comm has never really had an actual admin or mod other than ones to serve as a human filtering system for the fb group and we've been just kind of been self-organizing, they didn't really know what to do when an actual situation arose.
I am side-eyeing their post about being scared for themselves though, since afaik they don't go to a majority of the member-organized meets.

As for banning Melissa without much warning, there's a possibility that they privately notified him but....eh.

To be honest, I feel like a lot of the people in our comm really lenient/just don't like conflict, which is why this situation has gone on for so long. the fact that our reputation is said to be "drama-free" is kind of double edged sword don't you think?

>>7872977
>>7873065
>>7874214
traveling anon here, I would like plan a meet so that we could have somewhere to gether instead of just expecting someone to throw a meet together, my friend I'm visiting knows some places.

I was just thinking of doing lunch at a sushi place and seeing who showed up, no one replied to the fb post so I'm like nervous no one wants to hang out

>>7875356
She's also the person who kicked up a fit because she wanted someone to hold a spot for her at a tea party without putting down a deposit first. And then she made a post accusing that host of leaving her out intentionally. I think she's pretty new, but I'm already so sick of her shit.

I really don't know why this didn't spark red flags with the comm earlier

>>7875359
Yep that's the one! Someone made a secret with the faces cut out and there was a brief explanation in the comments about the vulgar shit he was spewing

>>7875238
Maybe Gwen, but I was under the impression they hung out during meets because they both dress just as badly. Gwen's got some drama, too, what with threatening and harassing people, so that's not surprising, I guess

>>7875360
I really do feel like we could use, like, two more mods.

>>7875365
Christ I feel sorry for anyone that had to witness that.

>>7875365
Jesus SF comm, why you a creep magnet. Is it the radiation in the bay?

>>7875365
erp reloaded with names blocked but yeah

>>7875386
>>7875380
According to the admin, the person in question had already been blocked due to complaints, and hopefully now that MB is gone, the door will not be open to similar creeps.

>>7875391
Hopefully more comms get their shit together when dealing with creeps.

Can we work on banning Phil now?

>>7872218
>>7873711
>/cgl/ Grease group
you have no fucking idea how down I would be for that

>>7875413
Is he still going to public meets? I was under the impression that he only goes to AP meets, and the comm doesn't really have jurisdiction over that, esp since he's friends with the owner of HH

Honestly you guys should work on banning that Kiri chick, if I have to fucking hear about her gluten allergy one more time...

>>7875425
She's annoying as fuck, but that's the most she is. She's not a creep.

>>7875427
This, she's not threatening and she doesn't detract from fun at events

>>7875430
Well, she does detract from fun a little bit, but that' just because she grinds my personal gears. At least she's not a violent threat to the community.

>>7875423
Yeah he's going to this Halloween High Tea. I was on the fence about going in the first place (for completely unrelated reasons), but now that all of this shit is happening, I probably won't go.

>>7875423
I think he's gone to a few public meets here and there recently, but unless the BtSSB staff in the comm that have been harassed by him come forward with their incidents, I think it'd be more difficult to get him banned than Melissa. Someone correct me if I'm wrong though.

So any fallout from Melissa yet or is no one on his personal friend's list

>>7875437
>>7875436
Uhg. Gross. Yeah, I feel like getting him banned would be harder, too. He seems to have made more friends in the community than Melissa did, and people tend to stand up for him even when people point out that he stalked underage girls and has restraining orders. Maybe if the Baby girls spoke up, it might happen (and Kelly also got made an admin, and she has first-hand experience with dealing with him, since she's Baby staff.... maybe it would be good to appeal to her about it). But for some reason he has a lot of white knights. Mostly because he doesn't seem harmful at first, I think.

>>7875227
>Transphobia
Not transphobic in the least. No one here has made fun of trans people or has targetted them barring a few sandy cunts who are all "wah wah this fashun isn't for u" and even so, that's targeted at brolitas, who are MEN dressed in lolita clothes. For the most part, this board is accepting of that shit.

>Fat shaming
Except for a few ana-chans, this doesn't apply either. We've had plenty of "marshmallow" girls threads in here, so this leads me to believe you've never been on /cgl/ before or if you have, you're just cherry picking what's convenient for you.

No one would be against Melissa being in the comm if it wasn't because he's literally threatened someone with physical violence, plus other things that have been mentioned itt and others. Brolitas should be welcomed into the fashion if they have a genuine interest for it, but people like him, Phil and other creepers should be kept away from comms because they're a threat to their safety.

And it's honestly insulting for someone like him and his friends to be using transphobia as a shield for all the shit he's pulled so far, especially because he's not trans, and being trans is not an excuse for being an asshole.

>>7875250
It's probably because they're still afraid of him. I wouldn't be surprised if they were trying to be sneaky about all of this to try to avoid confrontation.

>>7875441
I'm on his friends list but I'm apparently blocked from seeing some of his statuses. Someone posted a recent screencap of his status on here the other day, and then I went to his profile and I couldn't see it. I'll screencap and post if there's any fallout that I can see, though.

You guys told the mods he had a gun. They handled it like shit but come on now

>>7875449
I never saw that, someone posted on the comm he had a gun?

>>7875452
Isn't he a gun nut like Lynda?

>>7875232
I'm not defending him, but this is a stupid, hyperbolic thing to say. Just because you're into guns, doesn't mean you OWN one. He seems like he has mental health issues, he might not even be allowed to get a license.

>>7875452

>>7875452
Apparently he anti-gun control. But he's just banned from that comm. California has a shitton of comm for him to go too.

>>7875452
There's a post by someone on there who alluded to the fact that he packs regularly. I don't blame the mods for being scared, who wants to risk being shot as retaliation?

>>7875457
>america
>implying you need a license to carry a gun in america of all places.

>>7875462
But... you do?

>>7875465
In my state, at least. Maybe not in Cali?

>>7875462
Please educate yourself before making stupid posts such as this one.

>>7875465
Open carry does not require a permit or license in states where it is legal. Concealed carry requires a permit. CA does not allow open carry as far as I know however.

>>7875249
>>7875262
Some of the Sacramento mods were notified, and are also members in the SF group too. MB has been removed from the Sacramento comm's fb. So hopefully word gets to Santa Rosa too.

>>7875457
I dunno, even if he doesn't own one, it sounds like he was implying that he does in >>7875458 so that's pretty threatening.

>>7875458
this just gets more and more frightening.

I'm honestly concerned about how they removed Melissa. A few months ago in Atlanta, there was a bunch of drama about removing a member without warning. It turned the whole comm upside down and resulted in there being new mods, new rules, etc. It was crazy. I want to make it clear that I'm not sticking up for Melissa, but honestly, they should have sent him a message or something, saying that they're banning him and outlining why. Otherwise, he has grounds to make a case that he was banned unfairly and without warning, and that can definitely garner sympathy from some of the newbies like Chanel who are all about "~forigiveness~<3" and stuff like that. I HOPE that the mods didn't just ban him and make a post and I HOPE that MB isn't going to just randomly find out that he was banned through word of mouth or something like that. That would make this situation even more fucked up than it already is.

>>7875472
I'm not the one who needs to be educated you retard.
>>7875474

>>7875485
Can you read? It literally says California does NOT allow open carry.

>>7875484
Its already been stated that he's been notified.

>>7875485
You can't read at all, can you?

They messaged Melissa about the ban, and it is permanent.

>>7875489
What did I say in my original post?
>>7875462
Yeah I think you should be applying your own arguments to yourself, sweet cheeks.

>>7875490
Alright, good.
I wonder why he hasn't said anything on his FB page yet.

>>7875484
The mods read the concerns that we've posted in this thread and have messaged him about his ban and why. Now, people are deliberating about how to handle events he has already RSVP'd to, but I can only hope the hosts just let him know he is no longer welcome and give deposits back where it's applicable.

>>7875444
To be honest I though he was quite friendly and sociable when I first met him, and I still would have thought so if someone hadn't brought up this information.
I guess he just doesn't give off as much obvious creeper vibes as Melissa especially since he's not quite as manipulative or have an anger problem as the latter.

>>7875503
He was friendly and sociable when I met him, too. Didn't talk about his medical conditions, didn't do anything to my feet or mention them, just talked about photography and whatnot. Completely normal guy. The evidence against him is overwhelming, though. Just because he was nice to me doesn't mean that he should be in the comm, where he intimidates other girls.

>>7875503
He is friendly and sociable, however, his interactions with the baby shop girls and others escalated a bit slowly. More gifts, more attentions, obsessive visiting. He may not be a violent offender in any of these cases but he certainly makes the girls uncomfortable. Afterall, don't you feel obligated to a person when they buy you things? Phil does need to be banned, though we should move slowly (not 1 year slowly) only because its a bit much, I don't think the mods or the community want to come off as ban happy after Melissa.

>>7875515
>stalked underage girls
>has 2 other restraining orders against him
>doesn't need to be banned
Anon, you're either extremely lenient or you don't have all of the information. Imo he definitely needs to be banned.

>>7875508
He had 2 restraining orders at the time he was stalking the btssb shop girl

>>7875515
One of the new mods does have personal experience with him, so I'm sure she'll make sure that it won't be overlooked

>>7875518
I didn't say he shouldn't be banned.

>>7875518
I don't think that's what the anon meant. It's either we ban Phil immediately after Melissa and look like we're on a ban-hammer trigger, or we wait to ban Phil at the appropriate time when Melissa is out of the spotlight but that means still keeping him in.

TBH the safety of the community comes before reputation, but a bad reputation could also cause the community to feel unsafe (ie what if they ban me next?)

>>7875525
Fair enough.

>>7875523
My bad, I read your post wrong.

>>7875503
That's how most creeps start off, anon.
I've had very unfortunate encounters with people just like him and at first they seem kind and sociable but they slowly evolve into their true nature.
He might not be prone to have violent outbursts like Melissa, but he does seem to have a bit of an obsessive behavior and fixation toward girls, plus no respect for personal space.

>>7875515
Regardless I'm very pleased with the SF comm for handling this and not making it a gender issue. Melissa should not be given special treatment because they're assumed to be a transgender woman... which btw, nobody can admit to hearing it from Melissa's mouth that they are a woman. The community is really great and positive so I hope to see more faces at meet ups now.

>>7875527
Its cool. I'm definitely not saying we wait until something DOES happen to a comm member, I just think we let this Melissa situation blow over a little bit.

>>7875525
I dunno, I feel like it's a pretty good time to address long-standing issues that people have been aware of in the community. Kind of like, hey guys, we have new mods, getting rid of creeper, everyone is safe are we cool?

>>7875508
Yeah, I agree. But like I said, unless people come forward with their incidents and/or he does something that qualifies him to go over the implemented three strike rule, we can't do much I suppose?

>>7875535
If people want Phil banned, I think now is a great time to start. Since Kelly has first hand experience someone should PM her so it's not a huge public issue (I think dealing with Melissa for now was enough for one day), and then maybe the mods can make a PSA about Phil and as to why he is banned. Him having the restraining orders and then stalking the shop girl should not be overlooked

>>7875344
>"I can forgive someone for something that didn't even happen to me and so should the victim!"
JFC what a sanctimonious cunt.

>>7875534
Yeah, fair enough. We don't want it to look like we're on a banning spree.

>>7875541
Yeah, but I think that people will be more willing to come forward with their experiences now. At least, I hope so.
Unfortunately, Phil's mere presence will continue to make girls feel uncomfortable, whether he starts to do shit or not. Getting him banned will be difficult, because now that rules have been put in place that will allow him to be banned, he'll probably straighten up his behavior and less people will have anything to complain about. But still, girls will be intimidated by his reputation and past incidents with him, so he'd still be negatively affecting the comm, even if he does begin to behave, finally.

>>7875543
I guess I'll PM her if no one else will.

>>7875119
>>7875128
It is really bad. I think that Holly is afraid of trying to fight Colleen. Either that, or she just wants it to go away. Since Colleen is in TX, not GA, I don't think there is anything to be done. I think the admins of the comms they have in common don't want to do anything as long as there isn't a public problem... I'm not sure though, as Holly won't talk about it, except for the following: She thought Colleen was banned from ATL because Colleen accused her of forcing her out with her "connections". Holly apologized for the confusion/accidental rumor spread. Idk what her "connections" are, exactly, maybe someone can explain that?? Colleen and Stevie threw a bitchfit and left Atl.

Colleen is still obsessed with Holly, I think, especially with having Stevie dress just like her. Honestly, I don't think Stevie noticed she was a copy of Holly until they saw each other at AWA.

>They are currently spreading their cancer in the cosplay community...
>Forever bashing other Cosplayers behind their backs
>Have a Facebook page... Stevie was a stripper and Colleen did some porn, I think.

Please keep these 2 away from society.

>>7875554
Since when is Colleen still obsessed with Holly? It seems like she's moved on. I haven't heard anything about her being obsessed and I'm pretty good friends with Holly.
As for Stevie dressing up as Holly... that's a bit reaching, isn't it? And Stevie and Colleen being in the sex industry has nothing to do with it so I don't know why you're bringing it up.

>>7875563
Someone asked what was going on with them, and this is what I've seen going on. I hope I'm wrong about Colleen being obsessive.
As for the co-ordinates... Idk man, look up their Sunday co-ords and judge for yourself. It was eerie in person.
As far as the sex industry goes, I guess it isn't relevant...; just interesting to see if they go the same way some others are going for e-fame.

>>7875575
I talk to Holly a fair bit and she hasn't mentioned Colleen being obsessive lately, so I'm not sure that's true. And yeah, I guess you could say something about their coordinates? They both had unicorns on them, but if I remember correctly, Stevie has had that dress for awhile. Idk, I guess I just think it's reaching, but then again I wasn't at AWA this year.

>>7875227

Are you new? They're welcome as fuck, as long as they look good and aren't using their fellow lolitas as fetish fuel.

>>7875494
I can't wait to see evidence of his bitchfit.

Melissa once called me a chinky bitch. I'm glad it is banned.

>>7875776
I will be so disappointed if there isn't one

>>7875106
>>7875096
I like a good giggle, but talking about sex all the time makes you sound like the desperate one from The Inbetweeners.

>>7875936
I JUST WANT SOME CLUNGE

Congratz on getting your local creep banned SF. I hope we can get rid of ours too.

>>7875779
Wow what. I'd only ever heard of his violence and fetish issues, but all the evidence of racism, too, was new to me. There was like 10000x reasons to ban him, can't believe it took so long. But I'm so relieved now!

Just saw Melissa's status. She claims the SF Comm is transphobic and is planning to attend the meetups even though she is banned. Also Phil is standing up for Melissa.

>>7876097
Oh boy, I hope somebody has the balls to call the cops on his ass if he tries to show up

>>7876097
Cap?

>>7876097
Can you screenshot that?

>>7876097
And that dumb Chanel bitch. I swear to god if she wants to hang out with him she can fucking do it by herself

>>7876101
>>7876103
>>7876106
>>7876108
Here you go. The names are censored.

>>7876103
>>7876106
You can find it on Facebook: /story.php?story_fbid=640263512759286&id=100003269288335

If that's deleted, here's a shitty iPhone grab of the original post.

>>7876115
Shit, I just realized that that fucking bitch might just tell him about meets. I mean, a ban's not gonna be effective until we can actually keep him out

>>7876115
This is such bullshit. There are plenty of people in the SF comm that don't fit the "ideal lolita type" but are still welcomed at meetups. The difference is they have basic human decency.

>>7876122
It will be, because you can, at this point, file a harassment claim. If you have screenshots and records of him being awful then you all are within your rights to go to the police for a claim. Maybe he'll take it seriously then.

>>7876132
And the weird specifications of 20 and female is so wrong it hurts

>>7876132
>There are plenty of people in the SF comm that don't fit the "ideal lolita type" but are still welcomed at meetups.

Like ElleJay for example.

>>7876115
Jesus Christ, is that dumb bitch actually giving names and details out so that if Melissa goes on full rage quit, they'll know who to target. FUCK this dumb cunt.

>>7876137
Yeah. I don't want to talk about specific people, but we do have members of all ages, genders, ethnicities, sexual orientations, etc. and none of them are discriminated against based on it. Some people have disabilities, food allergies, or are vegan (as Melissa claims to be) and it has never been a big deal. We have members who are into kink too but don't mix it with meetups and there has been absolutely no trouble with anyone but Melissa or his creepy friend James.

What's the Minnesotan comm like? Do they dress well or are they average? How are the events? And is there anyone that should be avoided? I'm hoping there's none that are Melissa-tier.

Comm feels/advice post?

Some girl in a comm I just joined was 'funposting' some rumors about someone else (who isn't in the comm) in the comm group-- that someone else is my significant other. I literally JUST JOINED and I feel like I can't say anything but what they said was really out of line and hurt my feelings and are really untrue. I almost don't want to go to meets out of fear of meeting her because I don't know how to peacefully resolve the conflict or if it should even be brought up at all... But I'm pretty upset what they said about him.

The group's rules say not to talk about the comm on /cgl/ so I'm trying to stay as anon as possible here but I am upset and wondering what to do about this? Do I do nothing since I'm the new kid on the block? Or should I speak up? The thread is like 2 weeks old in the comm anyway, so I feel like responding would just kick up a fuss especially since I'm new and the post is oldish. The rumors she put out were just really offensive and a little damaging to him and I'm also wondering if they'll feel the same way about me when they learn I'm his wife.

Maybe I'm overthinking it but I already feel threatened.

Good lord.

After seeing the drama coming out of the ATL Comm and the HLC this year, the SF Comm seems to be making a mad dash at warp speed and wants to get in. Ladies, this is gonna be a ugly hot mess for the next few months. I can still see Melissa going to the tea parties brands host, the J-Pop Summit, Sakura Festival and local Cons, and whenever Misako arrives to have a SF meet.

>>7876158
Oh, well, obviously there's nothing we can do about public events and brand events, but as long as we can keep him out of private events that's fine. For example, the last swap meet was super awkward because it was at someone's house. No one wants this creep in their house.

>>7876146
Well, the thing at Jpop was already known, and MB has had bad blood with the person in question. Thankfully, MB also doesn't stand a chance against this person, so there's nothing they can do there. I'm just concerned that Chanel is going to tell MB about future meets. Not sure if I should go to a mod about this.

>>7876156
Message that person privately, let her know you were uncomfortable and that what she had said was untrue. If you speak up now and they act threatening, it's not worth it to be part of this group.

>>7876115
I really wonder about these people. Do they just ignore all the complaints about these creeps?

>>7876190
The first and second comment are this dumb bitch right here >>7875344
And then another is Phil, who is just as bad a creep

>>7876180
I know that the lolita in question is hella fit and strong, but did you forget that Melissa is a pro-gun nutso? I might message a mod about this too, but I wonder how much they can do? I bet that idiot Chanel will try to make it a "boohoohoo SF lolitas are so meeaaaan now they're attacking me for being friends with people they bully! Ugh, who is she and why is she here??

>>7876206
She's really new, but has already done some really stupid shit already. See >>7873209 >>7875364

>>7876207
Wait, wasn't this the girl who wanted to invite everyone along to her super special tea party vacay in glorious Nippon where she's gonna host at Laudree (or was it qpot?) in the holy land of harajuku? Made me lol good

>>7876206
I think she should get a warning like "You are welcome to hang out with banned persons in your own free time, but please do not invite or encourage them to come to private meets, doing so will result in strikes".

Man, good luck SF sisters! Don't hesitate to call the cops/ ambulance if he threatens suicide or violence. Someone might also post on the comm that telling Melissa about comm events would be considered a strike against them, or something.
Just to cover all the bases. I feel like all these creeps should go make their own comm somewhere.

>>7876206
I dunno. She appeared after jpop summit so I guess she's been lurking. Last meet she brought her poor cousins over who just hovered around and looked bored. I have a feeling she's going to be an....interesting addition to the comm.

I just. I just can't.

>I AM JUST STATING MY FACTS AND OPINIONS

>MY APOLOGIES TO PEOPLE WHO SAID I WAS IGNORANT AND NAIVE

This is the most stupidly worded, backhanded apology I've heard

>>7876115
Just now from CH. jfc how in this issue can she she still make out about her?! She better be under 21 because this is some immature, special snowflake bullshit.

I can see so much drama from her starting even after this incident.

>>7876223
>>7876220
Please let her leave soon

>>7876220
What a horrid apology. I never expected one from her in the first place but I'm really tempted to call her out on her bullshit. She really doesn't seem to understand *what* this MB fuss is all about.

>>7876237
I think everyone needs to collectively ignore her

>>7876223
She is over 21 sadly.

>>7876237
Good thing she has a really weird looking face so I can remember to stay the fuck away from her at meets

>>7876196
Phil, YOU'RE NEXT.

>>7876239
I think shunning would be best.

>>7876241
Can't believe she's over 21.

Man this MB person... Why still bother wanting to go to meets when most never want you there? What does it serve MB for besides the already obvious issues. MB and others who are still friends with each other should just arrange their own meets instead of piggy backing other people's who don't want them there.

>>7876297
Because he's a sissy.

>>7876185

Thanks anon, I'll give it a shot and see what happens. I don't know why I'm so nervous about this.

>>7872218
I'm so glad to come back to cgl and see what has unfolded. SF, I'm very glad that your mod(s) stepped up and I hope that this makes you all feel a little safer at events.

>>7876330
If they're any sort of reasonable person, they'll definitely see that it's not courteous at all to make unsolicited rumors up about someone's significant other.

>>7876297
Because that's what their kink is. They get off on making people uncomfortable.

>>7876115
Wtf so he IS transgendered? Do I need to change the petition again? I'm so confused...

>>7876354
He might just be saying that. I mean, he also says he's not violent.

>>7876355
Heh. Well as I've said before if he says he is trans (even if he isn't) we should respect that because otherwise we will be seen as trans phobic.
I'm fine with calling people whatever he/she pronouns they prefer. But he isn't being clear about it and people who are his "friends" have called him a he before.

>>7876354
I honestly think he's saying that to gain sympathy and to play the oppression olympics. It's something you see all over the Internet these days. People without dysphoria who claim to be trans/gender fluid/WHATEVER to gain sympathy and act oppressed. It's embarrassing and insulting to people who are trans. If SF gets a rep for being transphobic after this, I'm going to be pissed.

>>7876354
MB claims to be transgendered but there's a lot of evidence which shows MB's an autogynepheliac (someone sexually aroused by crossdressing/the idea of themselves as the opposite sex). Also, MB got banned, so you don't need the petition anymore.

>>7876354
He's trying to appeal to others by painting himself as a victim. Can't say I wasn't surprised he tried this. People can be pretty easy to predict psychologically and behaviorally once given enough background information.

Either way, stay steadfast anon!

Some girl joined my comm, and literally every other statement out of her mouth is something about her life as an A-sexual. I mean, even stuff that's totally unrelated.
>Oh, anon, your shopping trip must have been so great. That's why I love dating myself! I treat myself instead of a boyfriend. You know, because I'm A-sexual.
>>Rinse and repeat
She's fucking obnoxious.

Some girl joined my comm, and literally every other statement out of her mouth is something about her life as an asexual. I mean, even stuff that's totally unrelated.
>Oh, anon, your shopping trip must have been so great. That's why I love dating myself! I treat myself instead of a boyfriend. You know, because I'm asexual.
>>Rinse and repeat
She's fucking obnoxious.

>>7876373
Classic abuser tactic is to act like a victim as soon as you've been cornered for your shitty behavior haha.

Good luck, SF. You have some people from all over the community behind you, no matter what.

>>7876378
Lol that's not even what asexual means. It's an aversion/revulsion to sex, not being anti-dating. She doesn't sound like she's actually very happy being by herself--if she was, she wouldn't feel the need to bring it up all the time.

>>7876220
I think she may have an actual mental disability which would explain why her comments are so off-base. It's seemed that way when I met her in person.

>>7876137
What about ElleJay? Always seemed normal and nice to me? Not in the comm just curious to know what makes her "different"

>>7876297
>Why still bother wanting to go to meets when most never want you there?

THIS. Why would you want to hang out around people that don't like you? Forcing them to be around you isn't going to make them like you. It's just going to make them hate you more and cause everyone to have a bad time.

I'm in a totally different comm but there is this one girl who is a total drama instigator and no one likes her but for some reason she can't seem to take a hint. I wish she would just move on and leave us in peace. Everyone would be happier (including her) if she just found a different group of friends.

>>7876389
Very true. And then blaming their victim for things is the other part.

>was going to sage for OT but realized it's already autosaging

>>7876406
Perhaps they want to make the people around them angry as a sort of revenge for not accepting them?

Good luck with that girl in your comm too.

>>7876393
I just took it as classic attention seeking behavior. She seems like the type.

>>7875128
There aint nothing border about it. 100% fucked up

>>7876400
She is normal and nice. She has a physical disability that requires her to use a wheelchair, so that needs to be accommodated for, but it's never been a big deal.

>>7875500
So far I know his rsvp has been removed and replaced from a tea party we're having later this month.

>>7875495
The comment you implied proved you right proved you wrong jfc learn to conprehend what you are reading. How do people like you live?

>>7876115
"I'm male but I'm a girl" fakes dont even try holy shit

>>7876214
yep that's her. But I think the time she went to AP behind her mom's back takes the cake.

>>7876488
....was she using her mom's card?

>>7876488
Christ I had a bad feeling about this girl but I didn't expect it to be like this. What a goddamn victim complex.

>>7876488
She gave the store a bad review because her mom wouldn't let her buy stuff?

>>7876488
What a joy. I'm so glad she's a part of our community, I can barely contain myself.

>>7876497
Probably? How would they even know her moms phone number? Is that thing you can get from a persons card or

>>7876566
Maybe her mom called the store or something

>>7876561
Speaking of undesired people in the comm, what's the deal with Tiferet besides the fact that she's a hambeast and has a gluten allergy that's annoying to deal with?

>>7876620
Now that I think about it, aside from being a hambeast and doesn't know when to stfu Tiferet is an angel in comparison to Sissybro, Phil, and that idiot Chanel.

>>7876693
I can't agree more. Dare I say I was actually impressed with her posts during the last 24 hours? It makes her arrogantly talking about how she only drinks imported special snowflake tea while using stupidly her tea strainer to sift sugar into her tea cup seem downright charming.

>>7876693
Ah I see. She does seem overly talkative but she was also quite helpful in the discussion about Melissa. Her outfits seem pretty decent too (other than the fit) so I was just wondering why there seemed to be quite a few people on here that really didn't like her. Never met her so I was just curious.

>>7874536
What time in 2016 is she planning the trip?

>tfw my comm is planning a similar journey
>not sure if want to be in same place at same time

>>7876354
>I'm male (but identify as female)
No. He's not. Because if he were trans* he wouldn't phrase it that way. At all.

>>7876406
He's a sissy. Sissification is about humiliation, emasculation, and so on, presented with frilly dresses. It often has an element of belittlement between the sissy and whomever is "forcing" him into the clothes. In his case, he has no one forcing him, so he turns it around and uses the comm as his "oppressor".

TL;DR: MB's hatred for women and their (perceived) disdain for him "as a man" is how he gets his rocks off.

I'm surprised that this all hasn't happened sooner, purely because it's all tied into behaviours associated with the fetish. Didn't another comm (Houston? Or Austin? I know it was in TX) have the same exact issue with Brolita Jenny?

>>7876750
Oh god, same here... My group of friends are thinking spring or fall, when the weather is better.

>>7876566
My guess would be that they've had issues with this chick doing something like this before, so her mom had them put her number down in the event that her daughter tried it again. They're a small company, I wouldn't be surprised if they have a list of customers who have done questionable things in past that they keep an eye on.

>>7876620
If you don't like hearing about people's gluten allergies but live in the bayarea, you're going to have a bad time, even if you stay away from Berkeley.

>>7873046
Hi Dom.

>>7876879
Hey I said I never met her, so I just taking words out of anions' mouths. Saw a few complaining about how she keeps stating it so I just mentioned it.

>>7873046
I just saw this and I honestly don't understand, why are you so obsessed with dragging this up? I don't get it at all, there's been no drama, let's keep it that way, thank god bitches aren't present, jesus christ. Your thirst is ridiculous.

>>7876366
That actually is still trans. Its weird but if they decide to actually transition it is just as valid as mtf who dont have a fetish.

>>7876978
Curious anon here, but care to explain more? I thought that people who were trans felt that the sex of their body was at odds with their gender. That seems pretty different from someone who is ok with their sex but get off on dressing like the opposite gender.

>>7876423
Yeah. It is fucked up. Colleen's ex put up a status on FB about how she's not doing too well... I wonder if it had to do with the harassment, or if someone told her about this thread. I know the poor girl is sick of Colleen, Stevie, and the people that keep them around.
I feel so bad for her. She already went through so much crap while Colleen dated her. It's just sad that she's still not left in peace.

Who is in high school?

The irony.

>kicked out of comm for threatening violence against others
>friend offers to help you commit violence against others
>you thank them

... way to be even more of a dick than we already knew you were.

>>7876978
It's not trans. Being a crossdresser doesn't mean that person is trans.

>>7877110
This much Denial.

>>7877110
Except I'm pretty sure Phil was sneakily removed, too. Can't find him when I search the group

>>7877130
Maybe he left of his own will?

>>7877130
Phil wasn't in the actual group in the first place to my knowledge

>>7877134
Wait, what? How is he getting into some of the meets then?

>>7877134
Oh, weird. I guess he was just getting into meets through seeing events through friends, then? I mean, he can't exactly be "banned" I guess, if he's not in the group, but it's something that people should be aware of.

>>7877144
That makes things a lot harder since he's wormed his way into being friendly with a lot of lolitas. And here I thought with Melissa gone, we'd finally catch a break and be able to get rid of all the creepers.

>>7877141
He is friends with Lynda and has other friends in the comm

>>7877141
Many people are unaware of Phil's past and invited him to meets.

>>7877059
>>7877117
There is a difference between just wanting to dress like a female for whatever reason and wanting to BE a female. I dont know how the trans community itself views these people, but in psychology they see it has 2 different ways to view trans people who come in to therapy. There is the typical way, in which the person desires to be this gender to the point of wanting hormones and surgery and all that, which is really the whole point of it in psych. It isnt trying to label who is trans or not, just have in place rules to make sure no one abuses those medications.

For mtf, there is also a secondary track, which is what >>7876366 has pointed out is rooted in the fetish of being a female. This is not the same as someone who crossdresses, as you can have someone who dresses up in 'feminine' clothing without the fetish behind it, and many guys who would say they are sissies for example would not go as far as transitioning. But there are some who will. Their want to transition is rooted in the fetish, but it is the same thing, they feel like they should be a woman and so make the steps to be so. It is important to note that this is not saying that all mtf trans people are doing it for fetish reason or anything, just that there is a minority in this minority that do.

I dont think Melissa is trans, mostly because of the presentation. Saying they is a man that identifies as female isnt something you say about yourself as trans, that is how you talk about someone who is trans that you arent so accepting of, it comes off rude to most actual trans people. A trans female would say just that, they are a trans female.

>>7877110

friends suggesting to punch people
not the wisest thing to say given the ban reason

>>7877309
The kinds of people who would stand by him don't surprise me.

>>7877309
why does he keep on repeating over and over about not being in his 20s, and being single. his age (unless it was about inapropriate behavior with a minor) and his relationship status has literally never been mentioned.
Fuck, i'm 24, and i'm really careful what i say and do in front of the 17 and 18 y/o members of our comm.

>>7877332
This. I expected it, but the amount of mutual friends I have still have with Melissa sickens me.

>>7877309
Phil's response: "You treat everyone else with civility and respect. You deserve civility and respect in return. Not this kind of mistreatment."

Melissa has done the exact fucking opposite of treating others with civility and respect.

>>7877110
How much do you wanna bet it was Chanel H. That sent MB a message that she's being bullied into not being friends anymore.

>>7877539
It probably was, yeah.

>>7876115
if you were a transwoman you wouldn't call yourself male, nice try.

>>7877629
I REALLY wanted to say that on his status.

>>7876978
Fuck off, you have no idea what you're talking about.

>>7877400
I'm pretty sure a lot of people haven't deleted him because they want to see the drama first hand. That's why I'm still his friend.

>>7876241
Nope. she is not over 21.

>>7876206
They are not facebook friends, I just checked. It may be relevant to M's latest status.


I don't contribute often to online discussions.
But...I think C misread the reason for the ban. Perhaps she skimmed the posts, her reasoning suggested that.

She could be less passionate online, but that does not reflect her in person behavior.

She is pleasant in person.

>>7876122
......wow.
I'm pretty sure that she knows not to associate, judging by her actions of unfriending.

>>7877658
To add on to my above post, I think it's a bit of naivete.
C wants to be inclusive, but as she was defending M she didn't comprehend all of what went down.

It sucks that there's so much discord from how she acts in person, because I've talked to her and she's chill.

A is super duper sweet and her hosting that one event shouldn't have been posted about online- so yes....I agree C can improve her online behavior, but she's new...so with some gentle advice I think it'll be ok!

>>7877663
New thread

>>7876400
I think they confused her with her girlfriend, who is trans.

Why is the new thread gone?

>>7882202
No clue, but maybe we all shold go to a different board without delete-happy janitors.