/cgl/ - Cosplay & EGL

I'm almost 35 (started cosplaying at 18) and starting to feel it at cons.
I still enjoy making stuff and talking to people but some of the polish is taken off the joy when cosplay has become such a numbers game.

I really do wish people looked up to accomplished costume makers like they did when I was 20 something.
Now it seems all anyone cares about now are photoshoots and being the prettiest.

I sometimes think I think that reading things on here is making me sour. On the one hand it can be refreshing to see what people really think about things, but on the other, reading the shitty type of posts gets me down. I try to avoid them but enough of get mixed in that it's not easy.

I made a confession in a previous thread and I'm following up on it: my closet is huge. It no longer fits in the space I have put aside for it and has basically started to take over the room. I rarely wear lolita however, and have begun to realise that I should sell things. Originally, I said I'd get a friend to help me cull, but I've ended up doing it myself.

I started with:
>90+ JSKs and OPs
>30+ skirts
>30+ blouses
>30+ cutsews/boleros/cardigans/etc.
>15+ vests, corsets and bustiers
>15+ jackets, coats and capes
>More bags/accessories/hats/shoes/socks/tights than I want to count

I do not have a lot of sought after prints or pieces, and every time I tried to bring myself to sell something before this, I would chicken out. But I'm making progress. I've sold three JSKs and four blouses in the last month, and have listed two more dresses and a skirt for sale. I've also sold a few pairs of shoes that I never wore to local girls. I also haven't bought anything new since December.

I don't feel the horrible regret that I was scared I would feel in selling things off, but I'm also not paring down as quickly as I had anticipated. Right now, I'm trying not to analyse how I attained so many items without wearing them, or why for that matter.

I know I've made the right decision.

>>7465315
>90+
>90+
>90+
...i...how

>>7465315
That's good news, Anon. I still want to come shopping in your closet. Listing and selling your pieces slowly may be the best idea.

>>7465319
I've been buying lolita for over eight years and in that time had only previously sold a handful of items. Like I said, I don't have a lot of sought after prints or anything.

I really hope I can find a job soon.

Being busy really helps me feel no so suicidal. I know life will pick up and there's still much I'd like to do and see but right now it's definitely a low month.

More of a pet peeve/ranting/seller anxiety

>Buy a very high on wishlist dress on payment plan with half down payment
>Sell a dress to make up for cost.
>Goes smoothly.
>MFW seller never notifies if received, if everything is okay, if I left fucking bobbypins in the pocket and washed the dress and forgot about them and rusted the pockets after hand washing (paranoia), somehow got a big ass stain on it that I never knew about.
>I just want my new dress man.
>Feedback on lacemarket as a seller would be really fucking nice guys. JFC. 3 dresses sold, 2 bags, no seller feedback. Miniscule feedback on egl.

More of a pet peeve/ranting/seller anxiety

>Buy a very high on wishlist dress on payment plan with half down payment
>Sell a dress to make up for cost.
>Goes smoothly.
>MFW seller never notifies if received, if everything is okay.
>Did I remember to clean the pockets out? Oh shit. Did I leave in bobbypins or something when I handwashed it? Did it rust the pockets? Oh fuck.
>I just want my new dress man.
>Feedback on lacemarket as a seller would be really fucking nice guys. JFC. 3 dresses sold, 2 bags, no seller feedback. Miniscule feedback on egl.

>>7465315
I remember you, good job with starting. I know if I had that much I'd be overwhelmed but you shouldn't feel like it's going too slow at least it's happening now and you aren't just wishing it was gone and not doing anything about it. Good luck with your sells

>>7465366
Just remember that no news is usually good news. You can keep the tracking number and check it every so often to make sure it at least reached them. I feel ya on the no feedback thing, ugh... it seems like most buyers on Lace Market aren't very communicative in general in my experience

>>7465315
First off, congratulations. You're doing your best to help yourself. That's way more than a lot of folks out there.

Personally I'm a brolita whose female (aka: Lolita) wardrobe is starting to physically outweigh my male wardrobe. Because of my work I don't really have the time to join the local comm and I'll admit that I'm not sure if I belong.

So really I'm building up a ton of expensive frilly dresses and outfits which I can't use anywhere except for the occasional nightclub outing. Makes me wonder if I have my priorities in order.

>>7465315
I know what it's like to step back and realize, "Woah. How did it get this bad?" It's overwhelming. It made me feel so small. I'm glad that you're taking control and feeling good about your results.

I kind of want to buy from you. But I have my own spending habits to watch, hah

>>7465604
Yep. I also want to stay anonymous about this, because. Well. It's kind of embarrassing. I don't want to be known as "that hoarder" or anything, you know what I mean?

I'm sure people would figure it out if I said what I've sold recently, or what I plan to sell. It's not hard to track sales since selling platforms are rather limited for lolita. Hell, just based on the numbers of what I've sold recently, a local lolita could figure it out.

>>7465785
I was glad to read that you are clearing out and I didn't think you were a hoarder. I didn't think you'd come off Anon for reasons stated plus the jelly that you have so much but damn, I'll be looking for the good condition older things if you are listing them. I am not really after sought-after prints save 2, just good used basics. Good luck.

>>7465285
I agree. This place can change you. I came here for information and to get and give advice when I can, but I find myself more and more thinking negative thoughts. I can't look through coord posts anymore without thinking things like "that belongs in the ita thread!" and "how did that landwhale fit into burando" and the other day I caught myself actually saving a file with the intention of posting it here (but I didn't).

I've never been that kind of person and I don't want to be. What's worse is when I look at myself and have these kinds of thoughts, and then I feel like shit. I had actually gotten to a place where I was happy with myself before I came here and realized how others would see me.

>>7465797
It's insidious because it's the first place lolita news breaks so who doesn't want to hear it first? But I can do without the negativity and temptation to post catty things. Even though it's kind of fascinating to read, it makes me think badly of myself that I sometimes want to post them. I think I'm going to limit my time on here and stick to the general thread, the shopping threads and other mostly ok ones and just hide the other ones and refrain from commenting anything but information.

>>7465797
Maybe take a break then? When I feel like I'm on 4chan too much I just use the "self control" app to block it for a while.

I definitely notice that, because of lolita and 4chan, I now enjoy gossip (I used to hate gossip and didn't particularly like those who engaged in it), and I enjoy it when dramatic confrontations or other events happen. I never used to care about that kind of thing.

>>7465315
I've been doing a similarly thing with my lolita closet, although it's not as bad as yours. At one point I realized I had something like 45 skirts but only wore lolita maybe 5 times a year... and I realized I had to cut down. It's really hard to let go of things at first, but once you start letting go and selling things it will get easier and easier. Start with a little, and pretty soon you might find yourself excited to sell things (especially if you have other financial goals, like building up to a certain savings amount or saving for a vacation).

>>7465315
Also I know a lot of girls on here have probably dealt with minor to severe "shopping addiction"/dependency/whatever you want to call it. Have any of you found any books or resources that helped you? I read this book and it was pretty helpful, but it seemed more focused on those that are in debt than those who just accrue far more possessions than they can possibly use but are otherwise financially unstable (my situation).

I like this skirt a lot. Enough said.

I was really upset at first to find out that someone was complaining about me in a thread but I don't feel so bad now. It was a misunderstanding anyway. I have quite a few friends in the comm who I am really close to and speak to a lot/hang outside of lolita. I really like to please people and help others so I was very surprised to find myself in a thread. I just think it's a bit silly now.

>>7465839
>>7465834
I'm not sure if you can call it a shopping addiction, really. I mean. I suppose it is to a degree, but it's closer to hoarding over time. I think. If you spread everything out over the eight years I've been buying, it comes down to about one dress and two to three other items per month in the end.

I'm actually considering using the money gained from selling to buy into a friend's business. He needs a small infusion of cash to develop an app and if I sell everything I've got up right now, it'd be enough to get him started.

As far as staving off the urge to buy things, I just go look at the pile of clothes that has accrued on my ironing board and that kills it. I don't have enough hangers/enough space in the closet to put things away.

I also have figured out that if I bookmark something and don't look at it for a few days, by the time I go back to it, I no longer want it as much and can close the tab without regrets.

Guro is my favorite style of Lolita but aside from just slipping in an element here or there, I'm afraid no one will take me seriously if I make full guro coordinates. Even if I minimize the costume-like elements and stick to subdued styling.

- I currently have 3 dresses that do not fit me; I convinced myself I'd just lose weight. I am trying (not very hard), but still not sure if I ever fit them. I just bought them for the person I would like to be (thin, almost not boobs - not chubby, lazy and busty).

- I love Lolita, but I rarely really wear it. I always feel like an attention whore; after 19 years of being normalfag/invisible, I am just not used to anyone paying attention to me. Sometimes the fear of comments/rude stared and the stress I put on myself because I feel like everyone's judging me (and think I am a crazy attention whore) stops me from wearing Lolita. Again, I feel like bought the clothes for someone I would like to be (brave, give no fucks, always confident about herself - not insecure and constantly worried about nothing).

- Uni is starting next week, and I am so afraid. It will be my second semester, and afterwards I have my first exams. I have not studied the whole semester break, and I hate myself for that, but I just cannot bring myself to do anything. Also, I am not sure if I get into the classes that I want to; I do not have n aprovement for 3 classes, which means I need to talk/beg the prof to let me in.
Also, I have not really made friends; and the 2 people I at least talked to do not share any classes with me (exept one), so I will be alone, and I am afraid. I do not want to spend a semester alone again. I am the only person who has not made friends, unlike all the other people I know. I think I will deny myself to wear Lolita/anything too "weird" to Uni for a while, so that I at least look more approchable.

-On the other hand, I constantly feel tired, and want to be left alone. I cannot bring myself to do anything, be it sudying or cleaning my room; I just lay around feeling sorry for myself, but I cannot get up to DO anything to change my situation. Pic related is how I feel most of the time; which also makes me feel guilty even more, than I get more sad- Endless cycle.

Even though I caused shitstorms and my confidence was hit hard, I miss being a tripfag on here sometimes. I felt like I made many friends and was more motivated to start cosplaying. I most likely will not do it again but, I don't regret doing it in the first place. I wouldn't want to bring back any old drama here. Oh well, consequences.

>>7463816
This so much, anon. I'm almost 32 and have been in the scene since 1999. I miss COSP and the early days of coscom and that amazing sense of community that has disappeared. I still cosplay because I live for sewing, but I feel so old and out of touch. You are not alone, fellow veteran!

>>7463816
>>7468778
I love to see accomplished cosplayers in this age range! You DO inspire, I bet you just don't know it or hear about it. Everyone who thinks they can't, was afraid they are too old, is thinking they should stop at a 'certain age'...when they see you, you are proof that they don't have to stop, or that they can even take it up at an older-than-20 age.
I get it if you just aren't feeling it but rest assured, you are affecting people in a positive way as long as you continue.

>>7468424
There's a good tip I've read on minimalism/frugality blogs. Don't buy clothes, hobby materials, or anything else for your "ideal" self. Don't buy for the super-slim party girl you think you want to be, buy for the average girl that likes sitting inside and watching Netflix. It's inevitably wasted money you get no joy out of, only disappointment. Buy for the person you ARE, be realistic, and you will be way happier and get far more use out of your purchases.
I think it's a decent idea in theory to have a "goal dress" or two, but three or more and a ton of clothes you don't wear is just wasting space, money, and making you feel worse about yourself.
Also I would look into antidepressants, or at least some St John's Wort, that shit is amazing

>>7468778
Same here. I still love going to cons, cosplaying and all of that. I just turn a blind eye to the beauty pageant side of it all and do what I do for myself and friends.

>>7468803

Thanks anon! i am currently trying to follow what you suggested. This year I got rid of most clothes that did not fit me, and vowed not to buy more dresses from which I knew they would not fit me. Progress is slow, but I managed to do better than last year. Now I have to look to build up coords, because I tend to spend all my money on main pieces, and darin to wear the style more often.

I have considered seeing a therapist, but I am just not sure. My life is not really that bad; I study what I dreamed to study (even though I do ot think I chose the right University), I do not have any financial problems, a secure job, a loving family, friends (even though not at Uni), no disability or anything... I just feel ungrateful that I cannot enjoy these things like I should. I fell like al I can do is lay around drowning in self pity, being unable to do anything. If I am not pitying myself, I feel afraid of the most basic tasks (going to Uni, talking to people, motivate myself to do anything)- I dont't know what's up with me anymore.

I love cosplaying but I really don't care for making shit at all. I'm happy to just wear something and take pictures, the only crafting I really enjoy is styling wigs. It's kind of sad because I would love to cosplay from Fire Emblem but I obviously can't because I can't make armour or robes, but even the thought to trying to learn is really intimidating. I've had a sewing machine gathering dust under my desk since October and I know I'll never use it. I'm just too scared of hurting myself trying to use it. So I'll never get to cosplay my favourite characters because I'm too much of a pleb, and it really sucks. I wish I had a friend to show me around a sewing machine, then I could at least cosplay Soren like I've been wanting to for years. Forever a pleb.

>>7468853
Hurting yourself? Even when I was a noob 10 year old I never hurt myself with a sewing machine, it's almost impossible. Infact it's more likely you'd hurt yourself hand sewing.

>>7468858
It's a bigass needle hammering up and down! And I've heard all kinds of stories on here about people getting the needle jammed under their nail, or it snapping off and nearly piercing their eye.

>>7468909
Yeah and everytime you walk outside there are 100 things that could happen to you but the chances are so slim.

>>7468909
The chances that you hurting yourself using a sewing machine is really slim. I know I was scared of the hammering needle at first, but it's really hard to get your finger stuck under there. I had needles break and go flying, but I go hurt more times hand-sewing...

>>7468853
I also used to fear the needle and also to end up fucking up the fabrics, anon.

However, I must tell you that it's not easy as you think to hurt yourself with the needle. I know that it looks like your finger will end up down there, but with care and patience you'll see that, in fact, it's nearly impossible to end up like that if you are careful.

I suggest you to start little by little. Maybe not with a cosplay, but with little things. Also, for your first cosplay do not rush and take your time. You'll see that that fear is a silly thing.

Good luck, anon!

I'm a sewing noob. I can hand sew okay but I don't know what any of the stitches are for/ are called (except basting, blanket and zig zag I guess) and it looks incredibly sloppy.
But yesterday I handmade my first buttonhole, and it fit the button so well. It looked wonky and I know it's a shit thing to be proud of, but I'm so proud.

>>7468424
I understand this feel anon, I'm just a bit further down the road than you I think. I bought a few dresses that I feared wouldn't fit me, and have sold off most of them (thinking I could fit an unshirred Chinese small was the highlight of my bad decisions). Having the money for more realistic dresses for me, like ones with roomier bust areas, has given me a lot of confidence actually.
Besides that, I've started seeing a psychiatrist now and am currently searching for the antidepressant right for me. I was just prescribed Wellbutrin today after both Prozac and Seratonin failing miserably, so I'm excited. Hoping to get a good result.
I've also been going to my uni's gym at LEAST twice a week. It was tough at first, and embarrassing, but I'm happy I started making the effort. I lost 10 lbs in a month once I started (and started eating healthier too, ngl) and I wasn't even a fatty-chan, just skimming the edges of overweight for my height. Now I'm back to a healthy weight, and not gonna stop till I reach my goals.
I guess the only negative confession I have at this point is I'm still terrified to wear lolita out in public. Whenever I wear anything unusual around a lot of people, whether it be elegant, or, like, a low-cut top, I get insanely nervous and anxious. I constantly fiddle with my clothes, thinking they look funny or I'm showing too much skin or everyone's staring at me. I know it's ridiculous and not true in the back of my head, but I can't help it. And the end of the day I end up exhausted and a nervous wreck. I'm hoping it's just anxiety caused by depression because it never used to be this bad, and that once I find a good antidepressant it will stop happening and I can be more confident.

This girl I knew back in the day is now, according to Facebook, getting paid to be a plus size model and just shared some shots from her first shoot. They're baaaaaaad. Like, she has no clue how to make herself look good in front of the camera, the photos are poorly composed/edited, and the makeup was horrible.

It made me realize that cosplay has a) made me appreciate how talented other cosplayers/cosplay photographers are in so many arenas and b) turned me into a hugely judgy bitch. But, like, I know so many cosplayers who would blow her out of the water...

>>7468847
Anon, I think it's important for you to realize that depression is an illness. It's not caused by a bad family situation, or dead end jobs, or money problems. It's caused by a lack of chemicals in the brain that keep you healthy and happy. Though all of the things I mentioned could CONTRIBUTE to that chemical imbalance, they aren't the only cause of it, y'know? Anyone from any situation could have depression, just like anyone could catch a common cold. You're letting yourself live an incomplete life by not recognizing an illness!
What finally got me to go to a doctor about my depression was actually a discussion on cgl. Anons were talking about it, and one said something along the lines of antidepressants being a stepping stone to being a normal and healthy person. That stuck with me, I wanted that normalcy. So I called my (regular) doctor and told them that I was worried I may have depression. Doctors will take that seriously. After the appointment, he gave me the info of a licensed psychiatrist, and it's just continued from there. I feel so much better knowing I'm on the road to being happy again, even if it may still be a ways off. Don't let hesitation get in the way of you getting back that normalcy sooner, anon - I know I waited too long and I regret it.

>>7469066
>Having the money for more realistic dresses for me, like ones with roomier bust areas, has given me a lot of confidence actually.

Yep, this is what I discovered too.

>I've also been going to my uni's gym at LEAST twice a week. It was tough at first, and embarrassing, but I'm happy I started making the effort.

Nah, nothing's going to get me to a gym, ever. I use my mother's hometrainer 3x a week, and do some exercises from recommended youtube videos. Also planning on going swimmong more often.
Unfortunately, I have a hard time resisting food, especially junk food like chips or snacks in general...

>Whenever I wear anything unusual around a lot of people, whether it be elegant, or, like, a low-cut top, I get insanely nervous and anxious. I constantly fiddle with my clothes, thinking they look funny or I'm showing too much skin or everyone's staring at me. I know it's ridiculous and not true in the back of my head, but I can't help it. And the end of the day I end up exhausted and a nervous wreck.

Yes, this is how I feel too. i have god dys where I can easily deal with that, and bad days were I hate myself for wearing something that might attract attention and feel nervous all the time.
I guess this is something that just needs time. I don't know about you, but I have dressed like a normalfag for 19 years, and I was not very attractive, loud or otherwise attention-grabbing; so I am just not used to anyone paying attention to me.

Being the regular hormone bag that a 20 year old is I sometimes get horny while I'm wearing lolita and I can't masturbate because goddamnit I got all dressed up and my hair's nice and undoing it all would take so long, and I can't just do a partial undress to do it because sweating into these clothes is really not what I want to do

but damn

>>7468727
I feel you there. /cgl/ bludgeoned my trip off me and I have mixed feelings about using it again.

>>7469083

Thank you, anon for sharing your story!
I know it is an illness that might be just caused by chemical imbalance, but it is still so hard to acept - y'know, as most people I was raised to think dpressions are for people with "actual problems"; and everyone else having depressions was just a self centered whiny snob who just needs an excuse not to work hard and not get stuff done.
Also, I am really afraid I might not have depressions, and that the doctor will be like "Well, turned you are just an ungrateful lazy bitch. Get yourself together and stop waisting everyone's time."
Also afraid of what my family might think . that I am a special unique snowflake annoying everyone with this.

I do not want to call my regular doctor, tbh. We do have a therapist(or somethin similar) at our Uni; I thought about going there first.

>>7469097
Not that anon but there is a difference between having depression and being depressed.

Sometimes I wish I could just get a sugar daddy behind my SO's back and get lolita. But I'm too fat for it. It hurts a lot.

>>7469105
It's not as fun as you think.

>>7469111
It's not the fun I'm looking for. I feel worthless everyday. I'm trying to look for a job. I'm 21 with no previous experience and no car (overprotective mother). I thought living with my SO would help me, but its so demeaning when he has to buy my fucking tampons cause I have no money.

>>7469097
>Also, I am really afraid I might not have depressions, and that the doctor will be like "Well, turned you are just an ungrateful lazy bitch. Get yourself together and stop waisting everyone's time."
>Also afraid of what my family might think . that I am a special unique snowflake annoying everyone with this.

These sorts of thoughts are all too common in depressed people. Even if you don't necessarily need medication, therapy can do wonders. I honestly think pretty much anyone could benefit from therapy. You deserve to feel better, and you deserve to treat yourself well. No doctor worth their salt will say those things to you. Go get the help you need.

>>7469121
no one is going to tell you that. if anything they will be thrilled to write another script and collect that sweet big pharma paycheck

>>7469119
Actually I think you should go for it then but be careful. That's why I'm doing it, so I understand your feelings. Just make sure to use a fake name, and meet them in a public place sort of far from wherever you live.

>like lolita since the early 2000s at least
> now 2014
> buys first 2 dresses
> try on
> oh thats nice
> never wear again
it just sucks that i spent this long admiring from afar, sometimes longingly, never diving in, and then finally, so many years later, realizing its not for me. i still like looking at it but it's just not for me...

>>7469133
You sound almost like me.
>like lolita since highschool(early 2000s)
>start getting enough money to put into it and styles I loved before start going out of style
>trying to get used to new styles but still love older items

>>7469138
Some reason you can't just wear classic?

>>7469133
ugh terrified this will be me. just bought my first jsk and brand skirt...i hope i feel as good in it as looking at it makes me feel.

>>7468803
>St John's Wort
Is it really that good? I've been feeling down for a long time due to money problems and it's wearing on me. I wanted to leave the country and get a job outside, but with no way to save money I can't see any way out.

My family has a history of depression, and I'm fucking scared because I know the symptoms when I see them and I don't want to end up like that. I feel like I need a little extra help just to be able to look forward and still think there's a future for me.

>>7469160
I wouldn't use it if you're on hormonal birth control or any medication. It reacts with quite many drugs too. Same with grapefruit.

>>7469160

Don't know about efficacy, but it will interfere with certain medications, including OCP.

>>7469125
Med student here, and, yeah...no, that is not how that works. Most places won't even let pharmaceutical companies buy you lunch.

>>7469166
>>7469169
I'm not taking anything besides some occasional pills for allergy. I'll make sure not to mix them just in case. Thanks for the advice.

I'm leaving lolita because I'm so fucking tired of people staring and asking stupid questions. After 7 years I finally had enough. I told people that I just grew out of it. But I love it and I'm still going to look at it online. But I just can't deal with annoying strangers anymore. I AM WEAK.

>>7469125

Unless you're in China, that shit is illegal most everywhere in the Western world.

>>7469181
Hiiiii fellow med student!

>>7469073
Post em.
Then post your photos.
>>7469160
>>St John's Wort
Yeah I've never noticed a huge difference after taking this for a few weeks. If anything I think people just get a giant placebo effect from it.
tl;dr the fuckery that can happen when you take it outweighs the slight benefits
>>http://www.nlm.nih.gov/medlineplus/druginfo/natural/329.html

>>7469189
Haha hello! Gotta love how everyone thinks we're in it for the money. Bruh if I were, I'd be getting an MBA instead.

>>7469160
For me personally, when I used it instead of depression medication, I noticed a small difference but I was still pretty heavily depressed. My husband doesn't have chemical depression like I do, he just gets regular old "somethings not going my way" depression once in a while, and it helps him much more.

>>7469196
>>7469196
Damn, that's a long list of side effects. Not so sure about taking it now, but I guess it won't hurt much to try a small dose for a few days. I think my mother has some lying around. It can't be worse than wasting time staring at the ceiling and thinking how useless I am.

>>7469219
Meant to reply to >>7469218 too.

I'd rather stop hijacking the thread now.

>>7469190
Do you go out mostly alone in lolita?

I remember going to a thrift store once, and I found this adorable skirt. Turned out that the skirt was made for a two-three year old. I ended up buying it and added a zipper plus a tiny bit more of the fluff on the bottom and I wear it regularly for Fairy Kei. No one has noticed yet and I've even gotten commissions from people asking me to make similar skirts.

>>7469190

That is sad to hear anon!
After 7 years, are you not just used to it? Where are you from - do people bother you that much? Will you be selling your wardobe? Or why not try toned down coords?
Sorry, I just have so many questions...

>>7469226
I buy my natural/fairy kei skirts from a stoner store. They look wonderful and they are quite reasonable.

>>7469196
Ha, I didn't say I was any better (I'm probably not), but I'm saying that there are cosplayers who do this for a hobby who are way better than this girl, who is doing it for money. I'm not gonna subject this girl to being posted on 4chan but I'll at least show you her makeup artist's inability to draw within the lines.

>>7469190
Same here. Ignored it never bothered me much but a week ago I snapped. I ran out of patience after 10 years. Not leaving lolita but I feel ya man. :/

>>7469250
Looks more like a photographer and editor problem to me. Shitty edits, no modeling direction, uninspired pictures; symptoms of a problem that has little to do with the unfortunate model in question.

I hate what cosplay has become and I really should quit, but for some reason I keep coming back. I am disgusted by the scene and the 'professional' cosplayers, kickstarters and the people who make both of those things possible. Every convention booklet I see there's some new 'hot' chick doing guest panels and selling prints with only a handful of shoddy costumes and a couple thousand Facebook likes to her name.

I remember when people used to be praised for making good costumes, does anyone even care anymore? I see people who slave over making beautiful, accurate costumes ignored for a chick with too much makeup on in a barely altered Ebay outfit.

I try to just ignore these things and focus on my own fun, but it's getting harder and harder to keep inside of my own little bubble. All of my friends and acquaintances are making fanpages and forming 'geek girl' groups and the photographers I know are talking about inviting all the 'best' local cosplayers for their super secret project they want to crowd fund, and all the people they asked are moderately attractive looking girls in mediocre costumes. Not people I would consider the 'best' or anywhere near it.

Cosplay just feels dirty and cheap to me now. There used to be a separation between cosplayers and booth babes, but right now it feels like the mark of a good cosplayer is being a booth babe.

It's frustrating knowing no matter what I do or how much time I spend on my costume, I won't get the photos or even the positive response that one of my friends throwing on something from a popular series and posting a bunch of shooped webcam shots on Tumblr will.

I don't care about being internet famous, but it would be nice to know that if I spend 300 hours embroidering something because I truly love the character and want to do my best to represent them that at least someone out there would appreciate it. I remember being so excited and motivated to post progress and chat with other fans, and now I just feel nothing.

>>7469225
Yes

>>7469227
I am used to it but I just want people to leave me alone, for some reason I find it incredibly stressing. My outfits ended up being so toned down that I wouldn't even call it lolita anymore. So yeah, I'm selling almost everything, keeping a couple of blouses for casual wear and I'm trying to dress more kfashion-y

>>7469231
Mind dropping the name of the store? I've been really looking for some new clothing that's Fairy kei wise, and my thrift shopping days are usually very short, if at all

>>7469335
I'm not even sure if they are around anywhere but where I live. Its called Nirvana. They show up in malls and sell body jewelry, incense, and bongs. Sometimes they have nice skirts (that feel like reclaimed yukata and kimono fabric) and the other times they have cheesecloth.

>>7469160
Social Justice Warrior is a mild SSRI not proven to work. The mentality of 'I'll drink a lot of this tea and maybe I'll help!' is nice and tends to lend to placebo effect. But just keep in mind that even if it does work it's still simply an SSRI. SSRIs are not prescribed to everyone and I have friends who deliberately avoid them for their weird side effects, though it's not like they're benzos or anything.

>>7469363
Well, what works for one person may not work for another. A lot of people curse xanax to fiery depths of hell but it works for me without any side-effects or more importantly, addiction. Only side effect was my stoner friend trying to nick it from the bathroom.

On the other hand, Tolvon, which a lot of my group therapy buddies praise, gets me behaving like I've been pissing on hot coals, and I have a tendency to get into pointless arguments.

It might be different meds for people with depression (I have panic disorder) but the first thing I said still goes.

>>7469363
Can't tell if autocorrect or awkwardly constructed joke...

>>7469160
I've been taking rhodiola instead of St John's Wort and from what I understand, it's the same effect, just a different herb. Might be worth looking into that instead?

>>7469467
My dad swears by rhodiola, and he is a medical professional. I guess it has a lot of positive benefits for people not suffering from mood problems, too.

>>7469059
good job anon! just keep practicing and you'll get to where you want to be.

I was helping a friend try to get into the artist alleys for a couple local cons. She showed me a couple great looking drawings and I was confident that she would do well. She keeps saying that she's applying and hasn't heard back from any con even though they do send rejection emails. Things are starting to sound a bit fishy. Lately, she has been posting very complex looking drawings on Facebook more frequently with captions saying how it was done in watercolor or acrylic. I started reverse image searching her drawings and it's just as I suspected. Art theft.

Now I don't know if I should confront said friend or not.

>>7469772
Just call her out directly on fb like a bitch. It sounds rough but it's the only way they'll learn, if you just confront them privately she'll get really mad.

>>7469775
Agree with this anon. Also, since it's her photo can she delete your comment and block you? I'm worried that that will happen.

>>7469809
You should post the actual photo and tag her in it on your own page as well, as well as cap it. It's better she learns now from being called out than later from getting in trouble stealing.

>>7469775
>>7469809
I'm honestly on the fence about this because she is a great friend that helped me out multiple times in the past. I now feel bad because I think I just created a stupid and unnecessary rift between us.

>>7469822
She did it herself and if she's not above art theft for attention there's something wrong. If you really want to be nice, stage an intervention? Give some proof to a few of both of your closest friends and get them rallying behind you trying to help her. If she's lying about wanting in the AA and stealing art she's got something weird going on.

>>7465839
I don't consider mine severe or really an addition, I just tend to be too impulsive about shopping sometimes and it's left me with clothes I won't wear and wasted money. I've taken to selling things on ebay recently and it feels good to do that instead of wastefully shop as much. Idk if this is any help at all but good luck anon

>>7469089
As someone who went from constantly drinking beer and snacking on junk food to struggling to eat 1000 calories a day, I have some tips for you. You only need a week of disciplined eating to get used to it mentally. If you can just stick to it rigidly for one week, the next week will be much, much easier for you. Also consider going to bed earlier. I've been going to bed at 7pm so I can wake up at 3am and talk to my long-distance boyfriend before work, and that makes it a lot easier to eat less, because I'm still full from a late lunch by bedtime and I have to make myself have a snack to make sure I hit 1000 calories. Good luck!

>>7470155
If you don't mind me asking, what did you eat? I only eat one or two meals a day with only 1 or 2 snacks, and it usually comprises of salads, fish, soup, and not much else. I eat this naturally, it's not a self imposed diet and I still have trouble loosing weight. I'm 5'4" and 135 lbs, slightly chubby in the mid section is where I carry all my extra weight. I grew up in a health conscious family so I consider myself a healthy eater...I don't eat much and I dislike junk food. I'm fairly active so I'm not sure what else to do. My metabolism seemed to stop at 18 and I'm 24 now :/

>>7470250
So 1000 calories for me is normally 300 calories for breakfast, 500 for late lunch/dinner, and then one snack at work and one before bed. Recipes I like are baked sweet potatoes with low-calorie, high-protein toppings, egg mayonnaise, tuna melts, salads obviously. My meals are basically low-calorie vegetables with enough meat added to meet my protein needs. Snacks are usually fruit or vegetables, and I only drink tea, water and diet drinks. It's not the most exciting diet but it does the job, I've lost 25lbs since January and that was with about three weeks of bad eating in March. I have a cheat day at the weekend so I don't go insane.

>>7470265
Oh and by the way, this is the egg mayonnaise recipe I use and it is a GODSEND, so tasty and filling. I don't use the mustard and use salad cream instead of mayonnaise (tastier and half the calorie content), so my version is probably a bit lower in calories than theirs, but I count it at their count to be on the safe side. http://www.skinnykitchen.com/recipes/simple-tasty-and-skinny-egg-salad-sandwich/

Another tip is shirataki noodles, I personally don't like them but they're very filling and hardly contain any calories at all. What do you do for exercise?

>>7470269
I'm a pre school teacher. So if a kid is bad I run after them (because the naughty ones never come when they are called), I run up and down the jungle gym doing the slides with everyone, I have to rush to the side of any crying child just incase they actually are hurt and not just doing it for attention, and I live in an apartment, so it's not much but I walk around the block in the morning and night so my dog doesn't shit in my carpet. So nothing super rigorous, but enough that my legs are hurting even after 5 hours. Not that it does my legs any good because I allready have pretty nice legs, like I said its my belly that carries most of the extra weight. I've tried sit-ups/crunches, but it absolutely kills my back! Sometimes I do jump role with the few kids who CAN jump rope at that age. Maybe I should take up hola-hooping again on the weekends?

Potatoes are super filling though so I will try that starting tomorrow! And I do eat more on the weekends. I wonder if its because I'm not as busy or what. But again, it's nothing bad. "Bad" for me is like subway. I get my bread fix on Saturdays but that's about it.

>>7470290
Honestly, I think your activity probably isn't burning as many calories as you think it is, and the fish you eat may be high in calories too, fish can be a sneaky one because we're told it's all low-calorie but not all of it is. I would try to get in an hour of medium to intense cardio twice a week on top of what you already do. I walk about four hours a week and go to the gym twice a week for 75 minutes cardio and 30 minutes weightlifting. You may also just have a really low BMR, it can vary hugely between people of the same weight. If you do, that really sucks, but unfortunately all you can do is work harder.

>>7469467
>>7469479
Different Anon but thank you for posting about this. I can't take SJW because I take birth control. I ordered some of rhodiola today after I read a bit about it!

>>7469092
I don't know if it's worth the trouble to do it again. I don't know how some of the trips here still do it after all this time.

>>7468778
>This so much, anon. I'm almost 32 and have been in the scene since 1999. I miss COSP and the early days of coscom and that amazing sense of community that has disappeared. I still cosplay because I live for sewing, but I feel so old and out of touch. You are not alone, fellow veteran!

Oh thank goodness! I hardly ever run into people from those days. The scant few that I do see seem to have turned the hobby into some kinda super serious job so because I didn't go that route I'm not important enough to socialize with anymore.
I wonder if we know each other?

I was on COSP too. Boy do I miss that. I remember the only big drama we had was the Sailor Jamboree and Cosplay closet debacle. Back then since everything was so 'love of a show/character driven' everyone gave side eye to the two groups for even daring to be so unfriendly. It was so fun and games that it was foreign to everyone to actually be mean or do something purely for attention. Wow were we innocent.

I love creating things so much so I just enjoy that and willfully ignore everything else if I can. It's darn near impossible though with FB telling me to like everyone's cosplay page and kickstarters to fund people's trips to cons.

Hugs to you fellow vet.

>>7469428
It was legitimate advice about st johns wort with a silly joke thrown in...

>>7469276

I'm sorry Anon. I really am.
I've been around the hobby for a while and I've watched it become what you described.

I feel the same way and it's frustrating as hell. I tell myself that "You do this cause you love the show, it doesn't matter if no one gives a fuck." But in the end if the new flavor of the month is touted as the best thing ever while I see someone in amazing corsertry with meters of fabric that had to be hand dyed and beaded to within an inch of its life get totally ignored you feel like it's not worth it anymore.
It's just human nature.

I keep hoping the fad will pass and everything will calm down but then someone hits a new low of self promotion that makes my head spin.

Just know that I care. If I see something really well made/really spot on I will say so. I make it a point to praise the clear work someone did because someone needs to be out there doing that. Someone has to counter the people who spackle on the make up and photoshop with their boothbabe costume.

>>7468424
Are you me?

I gave up making friends at uni, I don't really care anymore.
But I feel really guilty not studying for my exams. Like now. Browsing 4chan an mbok...

I make and sell fursuits to pay for my lolita clothes.

500$ minimum per head/mask? I thought to myself, "shit, why the hell not?"

I don't mix the two.

I've begun a 400 calorie a day diet.

One banana in the afternoon and very small bowl of cereal in the afternoon.

What should I expect other than weight loss? What kind of dangerous effects will this have on my body?

>>7472555
tbh I think it's tumblr that made cosplay this way. go in a popular tumblr cosplayer's ask box and ask them that same question, "Why do you think you deserve so much fame and popularity over cosplayers who put hours of effort into their work, like *insert name here*?"

>>7474230

What doesnt kill you , makes you stronger, right?

>>7474230
Can I ask why, anon?
Some effects you can expect are fatigue and your metabolism slowing way down, and hair loss/irregular menstruation if you do it for long stretches of time.
The lowest amount of calories you should consume in a day is 500 beneath our reccomended amount, or 1200 at the least.
And, if that isn't enough to persuade you not to, at least drink unsweetened green tea throughout the day to stave off hunger and help our metabolism.
I'd also recommend getting some sort of protein if you don't want to start passing out at random. Instead of a bowl of cereal, eat fish or chicken, unless you're a vegetarian.

>>7474230
your hair will thin, your immune system will be lowered, you'll suffer from fatigue, your bones will thin, irregular periods, and develop dryer, rougher skin.

I am beginning to understand the feelings of those otaku you see/read about who say that they can only get off to 2D girls.
I can only masturbate to yuri and bl anymore, and this is an awful feel.

>>7474248
I tried on some clothes the other day and all I saw was the fat on my gigantic thighs and love handles spilling out all over the place.

I want to be cute and small and not have to suck in my stomach all the time. I hate not being able to wear cute clothes in a cute way. I was looking at a pro ana website that gave a calculator that estimated 400 cals a day would help me lose weight very quickly.

>>7474268

Could I have the link to that site anon?

>>7474268
It will work for the first few weeks/maybe a month or two and then level out, from experience.
I cringe at the fact that people want to will themselves into having EDs. They're terrible and ravage your body. The weight loss is really not worth it, anon. Start exercising and eating a healthy, slightly higher calorie diet (as in 1000-1200 calories of vitamin and nutrient-dense food). You'll feel a lot better about yourself and look better as well.

>>7474272
I can't post the link because 4chan thinks it's spam. It's the third link or so that comes up after searching "Pro ana" and it's called "Thin Intentions".
And here's the calculator that I used:
http://www.losertown.org/eats/cal.php

>>7474248
I'd like to avoid eating animals as much as possible.

I bumped up what I ate today to 535 calories just now after reading about side effects and deciding that I don't feel like fucking up my menstruation cycle or having my hair fall out.

>>7474276
Alright, I'll take your advice. I want to be tiny, graceful, and cute someday, not gigantic and towering and clumsy like I am right now.

>>7474268
post pics?

>>7474272
>>7474282
You could literally find a calculator to help figure out the right intake for you anywhere else. Pro-ana is fucking disgusting and makes it really hard to diagnose eating disorders. Nevermind that it's this endless vapid "a moment on the lips a LIFETIME ON THE HIPS" motivations with pictures of skinny thighs. Those places literally haven't changed since the baby internet. I must have been in deep back then, like fucking starved so much my brain accepted those as "inspiring" things.

And there's literally everything the previous anon mentioned. You're setting yourself up for long-term failure and a lot of illness.

>>7474314
Anon I completely feel you. I wish I could cut off my fat, it's so aggravating. When I barely ate or threw up, I felt like I was in control of something that would get rid of this awful fat and finally be the person that I want to be.

But it doesn't work for long, and it isn't the right way. Your body needs fuel, or you're going to feel awful and look awful. Try to eat clean and exercise a few times a week. You'll feel so much better.

>>7474324
I guess I'm looking at this as an option because I'm so lazy. I want to lose weight without moving around so much. But you're right, it's a horrible idea and it will give me bad results.

If I can motivate myself to not eat, I can motivate myself to exercise. I'll start researching other ways to go about this. Thank you, anons.

>>7474329
Thank you. I'm glad that you're all so understanding.

God, the worst feeling ever was picking up those stupid shorts with the frills on them and thinking "Hey, if I wear these, I can look just as cute as Dakota!" and then going to the dressing rooms to see my gigantic, hamtastic legs squeezing out of them like patte out of a tube. Fuck fashion when you're fat, man...

But now I know that there's better, healthier ways to go about this and that I'm just being lazy. I'll take your advice, anons. Thank you very much.

>>7474336
I was in your same situation, anon! It's definitely not easy, but once you get started and see the results it's so worth it. I still have cravings pretty bad and sometimes when I have cheat days I feel like shiiiiit, but I know it's for the best because that means I know I have to work hard to get what I want.
If you have a smartphone I reccomend downloading the myfitnesspal app to help track calories and exercise. It also keeps track of how much weight you've lost over time.
Good luck! <3

>>7474350
Thanks, I'll do my best! I might even post progress pics here. You guys have given me hope and have inspired me just now. I think I'll eat another banana to make sure I don't drop and go for a run. Thanks for everything, guys.

>>7474357
you can also try doing more exercise to build your muscles - if you eat well (like anon above said, 1200 a day is low but you won't starve) and exercise, you'll look more fit as you lose weight, too. the /fit/ sticky is so helpful, honestly, i read it when i want to get motivated to work out again. i do, however, ignore the rest of /fit/ completely

>>7474380
I'll see about joining my gym or buying some weights then. Thank you so much.

I keep forgetting we have a fitness board on here. I should have gone there first, haha.

>>7474347
I've had moments like that, too. I once bought some super cute ruffly pink bloomers because I saw cute thin girls wearing them in fairy kei outfits on tumblr. I could barely get them up over my thighs. I felt awful.

But most of the time I accept and work with my body. I manage to dress well for how my body already is and not how I wish it was. If you want to change your body and/or your lifestyle, take baby steps. Don't give up everything all at once.

I've started introducing more veggies into my diet, but in ways that still taste good to me and aren't so jarring a change, like putting them in omelettes (still gotta slowly cut down on the cheese though)! I used to drink a can of soda or two a day just because it was there. I've weened myself off it, and I drink water almost exclusively. I don't eat snacks nearly as much anymore. Less mindless, constant eating. Though I've heard snacking is good if you pick healthy snacks like fruit/veggies (???). Another thing I've started doing is telling someone close to me who's actively supporting me the things I eat/drink everyday. My feeling is, if I'd be too ashamed to tell them about it (e.g. "I just had 2 milkshakes!!"), perhaps I shouldn't eat/drink it. But occasional "cheat days" are okay, of course! On the fitness side of things, I've enrolled in a personal fitness class for next semester at uni.
Anyway, I'm kind of going on and on about myself. My point is it's a painfully slow process, but it has to be. Be patient with yourself.

>>7474336
I understand! When I hit that point where starving felt like the only way, it was because I felt...cursed, like I was a monstrosity meant to be fat forever. I needed to know, absolutely, that it wasn't true. Because I'd been dieting since middle school. So I just stopped.

And I lost weight. And I felt...relieved? Vindicated? Something close to crying. And I needed it more and more and more.

The way you talk about how you see yourself is worrying. I think that's partially why I responded vehemently against pro-ana sites. I was already in a bad place when I started and in no way did I 'benefit' from that community (I don't know how to describe that sick, hungry, envious community except ugly. And it's a completely different group than a of eating disordered people) but it's where I found all my extremely unhealthy 'tricks'.

The work, the actual eating and exercise seems really hard now, but once you have a habit down it'll feel like nothing and you'll feel BETTER, I promise. The way you talk, starving yourself is only going to feed into some horrible thoughs

>>7474412
It's good that you're taking steps to eat more healthily. I myself will do the same.

>>7474426
Thank you for talking me out of pro-ana before I went down that path, then. That experience sounds horrible, anon. Thank you for sharing it with me. I will make sure to learn from it and take your advice to heart. Thank you. Really.

>>7474350
Hey, that app you recommended wants access to my contact info. Should I be wary?

>>7474465
I've been using the app for a year now and I haven't had any trouble, it just gave me the option to link to Facebook. If you really don't want to put in your real info, I bet you could get away with faking it

>>7474445
Passerby here to say that I'm glad some kind anons were here to talk to you about this. I only started working out in November and I feel like I've already come a long way. Regular exercise helps your self-esteem and mood a lot, and you'll definitely see results in a lot of ways. Good luck, anon!

>>7474518
Thanks!

>>7474426
This is the same thing I did. Before my ed I was 180 5'2" and felt like I would never, ever find balance; I had been restricting/binging day/night since middle school. When I stopped eating properly, I finally lost weight. But it was never enough. Eventually it got to the point where I was trying to fast consecutive days whilst walking to and from work. A total nightmare but I felt 'strong'.

A couple months of this and I became a total emotional wreck, binging on food at work and puking it up to rid myself of the guilt. Enemas. Cutting. Running before breakfast and then not eating altogether. Lying and hiding and hoarding food. Puking into grocery bags and hiding them in my room. Staying up all night because you burned more calories that way.

It's not worth it anon. It consumes you body and soul, and takes years to rid yourself of. I'm lucky in that I got help; most don't.

>>7474347
If you don't mind me asking, anon, what's your height and weight?

>>7474567
I'm either 5'8" or 5'9" (I really should check) and am 142 pounds. I wanted to get to 125 pounds.

>>7474575
To me, sounds like you're no where near as massive as you think you are.
You've probably heard it from tons of people before, but exercise is so important. Not just running, but actually trying to build some lean muscle.
Seriously, 142 of lean muscle looks completely different that 142 of skin/fat.
I went from about 107 lb of absolutely no muscle to about 105 lbs in lean muscle, and I look 2-3 pant sizes smaller. Shit's crazy. And I know it's he most cliche thing, but once you start exercising regularly, it does make you feel a whole lot better in general. I'm not talking like running a dozen miles a day, just making sure to stretch and lift some weights every day, and like going out of my way to walk some places I know I could easily drive or get a ride to.

>>7474675
Good idea, anon. Thank you. Man, /cgl/ is so kind sometimes. I love you guys.

>>7474575
142lbs isn't bad at all for your height anon, maybe a little bit chubby but certainly not fat. You should bear in mind that because you're TALL and heavy, you probably have a higher basal metabolic rate than average, so you actually don't have to restrict your intake so much to lose weight as some people. I think you would probably be absolutely fine on 1000cal/day and regular walking. Try looking up a BMR calculator and seeing what it gives you. I'm on 1000/day and I'm not as tall as you, and I'm losing 2lbs/week, which is the fastest you can lose weight without it having bad side-effects apparently.

>>7474268
just as a side note to anyone here still considering the pro-ana way of losing weight:
if you lose a lot of weight very quickly without exercise, you're bound to get saggy tits and worse, loose skin. that takes surgery to remove. It's not worth it, I promise.
happy to see everyone being supportive though! the slow way will always yield the best results.

>>7465349
Try volunteering or crafting! I hope it can take things off your mind, and good luck finding a job!

>>7465797
Yeah its changed me. I really hate how it's made me all "ew fatties" especially since my girlfriend is dealing with eating disorders and I would hate to slip something hurtful...

>>7465821
Yeah, I've been more gosspy. I just had a falling out with a friend (it was more one sided) and I had a bit of satisfaction with the drama, and I hate myself for that.

Sometimes I really wanna dress up my normalfag friends in lolita.

Shopping is my way of dealing with stress and depression. It's better than cutting, which I stopped doing, but my money's going away. I've gotten better at managing my cash, but it sucks just browsing auctions with an empty spending account.

>>7476085

I feel you. I know this guy in my group tried to cheat on his gf with someone else. It's been really hard to keep it in because I'm kind of at the edges of the group already, so no one would believe me even if I said so. Still, it'd be so much fun to watch the drama unfold. I literally have no feelings lost for those two but I'm managing to convince myself not to do that because ti'd probably shatter the epicentre of the group.

inb4 why not tell the girl. I can't give two shits about her well being, but I can't give two shits about the dude's either. I'm waiting for the moment she finds out, but it isn't going to be from me because she refuses to talk to me for some reason.

>>7474412
>I saw cute thin girls wearing them in fairy kei outfits on tumblr.
>I could barely get them up over my thighs.
> I felt awful.

This post is dripping with pain. I'm sorry anon. I'm glad you started adopting healthy eating habits instead of starving yourself, your body will thank you for it. And about fruit/veggies being healthy snacks- some veggies like celery are so low calorie that they're almost negative calories to process...but celery doesn't taste very good without peanut butter, hehe!

And if it matters at all: petite, thigh-gappy asian girl legs are not the only type of beautiful legs. In fact, large swathes of humanity prefer other types...

>>7476114
It's not necessarily what others prefer, it more what we want out of ourselves and what we admire.

But that doesn't take away from your point that thigh-gap legs are not the only beautiful legs. Thank you.

>hey look timeline thread
>lol let's do a timeline
>make timeline all pretty
>look at it
>incredibly lackluster compared to other anons
>feel like crap

Looking it at it, it looks like I can't into nice makeup and good coords. I look so damn plain in all of them.

I've requested that if I die, all of my dresses go towards children. my wardrobe is mainly brand.

The lolita community is fucking awful. sell for a profit so some fat cunt will wear it?
fuck no.
give that shit to little girls to feel like princesses.

only little girls. or put them in thrift stores.

even now, I don't sell any of my dresses because the community is so horrible.

"b-but it would be a waste"

dying wish. wish I was trolling. I really loathe the lolita community. that's why I'm a lone lolita.

>>7476279
Just curious, but why not have them sold and have your beneficiary put the funds towards a foundation for terminally ill children instead? You can have them put on ebay without lolita keywords, so only "normal" people have a chance to buy them. And there are groups that specifically aim at providing kids with dress up/role playing game type toys.

Not saying you shouldn't hate the comm, I don't know your history, but the dresses are adult sized. They're not going to fit a kid the way the tacky, sparkly Disney dresses those groups provide would.

>>7476322
well, I've thought about that. I really dont want my family/boyfriend having to deal with these dresses.

it isn't really "for children"
its just more like
"I hope these dresses aren't touched by any horrible seagull/staminarose/tumblrtard ever"

I'd actually want for them to be tailored.
actually, fuck that, I'd probably give them all to a sissy fetisist or something

>>7476412
Do you mind if I ask what happened since you absolutely don't want another lolita to have/buy your dresses?

>>7476422
Well I'm relatively infamous in the community, but its 70% rumors. the 20% that are true, are stretched beyond belief. and 10% is actually gossip worthy (but happened in the past mainly, people are treating it like its recent, I'm talking 7 years ago)
no lolita will talk to me, and those who do find out who I am and cut off contact completely (even though they did talk to me)

I hate people that blindly follow rumors. and lets face it, seagulls tend to do that a lot.

if a seagull takes the time to talk to me and get to know me, and turn out NOT to be a catty bitch-sure thing. they can have all my dresses if I suddenly die.

but if people are going to keep side-eying me, and treating me, and others like me, poorly. I'm going to wish that my dresses never touch their hands.

>>7476443
I meant to say
>those who talked to me, even if they did enjoy our talks, would cut off contact because they believe I'm some sort of monster.

>>7476443
Ah, sorry to hear that. It really sucks when other people just refuse to forget the past

>>7476443

The timeline of this really fits somebody I know... State?

>>7476443
simply26 nobody wants your shitty wardrobe.

Not having an actual bear to console me. Feels.

>>7476279
It's okay, anon. I have a similar feel. I know that by the time I can actually afford my hobbies, I'll probably be too old for them anyways, so I'm going to buy them with my children in mind. If I can't be the beautiful, popular teenager with insurmountable amounts of brand that I always wanted to be when I was younger, then my daughter/grandchild/grandchild's child will.

I don't know if this is a confession, but I need to vent, so here it is. Local photographers are slowly starting to stop shooting with me. I don't know if I'm too bored to shoot, or if I did something that pissed them off , but it feels awful. One flat-out told me that I was the only person he wouldn't be shooting with at an event and then walked away. Shit sucks.

>>7476443
>people are going to keep side-eying me, and treating me, and others like me, poorly

wait...are you saying this stuff happened to you IRL or is it just a figurative way to describe the tone of text/image posts?

>>7477062
Oh god. That sounds awful. I'm imagining the feel is a bit like this:

>was it me?
>is it them?
>what's wrong with me?
>what's wrong with them?
>is it both of us?

So which one is it, in your opinion?

>>7477080
That's exactly what it feels like. I know I kind of pissed off one, but he wasn't the first to stop shooting with me, and he was kind of being a huge baby about it. He feels like I bailed on him, but we never set up a shoot, we just bumped into each-other and were like, "Yeah let's shoot after this thing I gotta go to!" and I said I'd text him. During the aforementioned thing, I got sick and ended up in the bathroom puking instead and forgot to text him. I tried to explain a couple of days later, but he get really passive-aggressive, both in private messages and on some public facebook statuses. For some reason, I agreed to shoot with him at a different event, and I did, but he's still really cold toward me when we talk, and he didn't used to be.

I think that one's on him, but the others, I have no clue. Like I said, he wasn't the first to stop shooting with me, so I know that it wasn't like that incident spread rumors or anything, or if it did, it at least wasn't the start of it. There's still photographers that will shoot with me, but I'm worried they'll stop soon too, and there's nothing I can do about it because I don't know what's going on.

>>7477101
What would you lose by asking the most reasonable one why they stopped shooting with you?

>>7477115
You make a good point, I probably wouldn't lose anything. I guess I'm afraid they'd brush me off with something like, "Oh no I was just too busy!", make me feel silly for asking, and then shoot with me out of pity.

>>7477118
Yeah, maybe you can find something out. Also, do you have any friends who are involved with the local fandom scene? Did you have some issues with them around the time you stopped being invited to shoots?

>>7477135
I haven't had issues with other people in years, in or out of any fandoms, and even years ago, I was only tangentially involved in some drama. I get along well with everyone as far as I know, unless there's something about me that's really grating and no one wants to tell me, but I doubt it since I seem to be good at keeping friends. Nothing happened recently before photogs stopped shooting with me. So unless it's drama from the past rearing its ugly head again, which I seriously doubt, I can't think of anything. I'm more worried that I did something like forgetting to credit a photog somewhere and it getting blown out of proportion, but I'm always so good about that, and no one's said anything. It's not an issue of having boring costumes either, since I get a good amount of random shoots at cons from strangers. It's just the photogs that I've shot with before that aren't shooting with me, and it's making it hard to schedule shoots and network.

>>7477146
possiblities
1. unknown drama
2. your cosplay isnt worth shooting
3. youre not aesthetic enough to be worth their time

>>7477155
Like I said, I get shoots from strangers at events, it's only the ones I know beforehand that are being weird, so my moneys on unknown drama.

>>7477159
gotcha, well if they wont tell you directly and nobody else in the same friend circle says anything then good luck figuring out what the drama is? How often are you late to things or are they not getting paid/etc or are they getting more busy. Don't worry about it too much if its just going to end up being something silly!

>>7477165
Thanks, it probably is something dumb, but it'd still be nice to know. I'm never late to scheduled shoots, and they are free shoots, so I can only complain so much. I haven't noticed them getting busier, but what do I know? I wouldn't think so much of it if they didn't all stop shooting with me at once, or if the one hadn't flat-out told me I was literally the only one he wouldn't shoot with. I thought he was kidding or something, but then he walked away and actually didn't end up shooting with me after that.

My depression is getting worse and worse. It's a bunch of things that have been eating away at me for a long time, plus a few somewhat recent things. I had a trip to go to Europe after a breakdown I had at a con so I figured that that would help. Turns out it only made it worse after coming back.

Ended up drinking pretty much a whole bottle of vodka last weekend and crying about how my life sucks, I guess.

I don't know-- I'm not really good at therapy and I'm stubborn and haven't gotten around to going to the doctor. I just wanted to state how aggravated I am with the whole situation, not really looking for help, I guess.

>>7477174

How does your life suck in what context?

>>7477174
See, I don't think my life is particularly bad. It has bad aspects, but I guess after a bottle of vodka, I think my life sucks. At least, so I hear. Basically all sorts of fun things like childhood trauma and a bad parent.

Basically I just want to be able to do shit with my life again. Haven't made a new cosplay in like a year, but fuck if I have the motivation to do it now.

>>7477191

Quit drinking and get motivated again.

Start working out, that helped me a lot.

>>7469190
after 6 years I stopped too. told everyone the same thing, that I grew out if it but still find it pretty to look at. But I always get reactions like 'I told you so' or 'you young people with your phases'.
I was sick of people judging my because of the way I dresses and now they still judge me because I don't dress like that anymore.

Since this is like a confessional? I have always wanted to tell someone about my life but I have never had anyone.

I am going to keep this REALLY short but, just so some of you guys who are depressed/gone through the same shit know your not alone.

>Age 13 - Father(Literally my best friend), Uncle, and grandfather dies
> Age 14 - Lose virginity to rape by 'Friends'. Try to kill myself end up in ward for 3 weeks.
>Age 16 - Mother loses house and goes batshit crazy on pills, I get kicked out, start living with boyfriend (Who I am still with THANKFULLY)
> Age 17 - Graduates high school early due to never showing up and teachers feeling bad for me, they give me my last credits needed. Boyfreinds friends Father ( confusing I know) Rapes me while I sleep. Whole other issue follows with that.
> Age 18 - Finally gets a car, license, and a good job. Gets fired from said job for yelling at boss who felt the need to slap my ass.
> Age 19 - Depression is still really really bad, but my boyfriend really helps me and makes me feel like I am worth a shit.

All in all I do feel sour towards my life. Many more bad things have happened, but the ones listed are the main life altering ones. Just needed to rant that I guess.

>>7469190
The next person to ask me where my sheep are gets scolded.

Like... we could've been friends, man. But then you went and treated me like this.

It's so minor, but you know what, after having so many people keep telling me to get over it, I think people should start take their own advice. It's just as easy to get over something as it is to apologize for it. They can deal wid it.

If someone I know refers me to someone I don't like, I intentionally make their props faulty so they break.

>>7477242
I like you.

>>7476823
Ikr? Everything would be better if I just had a bear.

For the most part I stay out of shit talking and drama on /cgl. I do however lurk and post a lot in coord and mail threads and sometimes the things that I post make it possible to identify me (coords, outfit shots, shopping hauls, etc.)

So when people come and shit talk my comm on here, I can't help but believe that others might think it's me doing it.

I love /cgl and I love posting here because you guys have taught me a lot and are often really helpful but this is really starting to weigh on me.

>>7468804
>You DO inspire
>you are affecting people in a positive way as long as you continue.


That's SUPER nice of you to say Anon.
I mean really. Thank you for taking a little time out of your day to even say this. I really appreciate it.

It is so easy to think you just don't matter anymore now and hearing this puts a smile on my face and hope in my head that somewhere someone appreciates us older cosplayers.

My first piece of brand is in the mail and I've lost all interest in my bodyline and fanplusfriend shit. I want to sell it all. Is it a good idea to sell off all my crap which is like 14+ dresses and skirts? Or should I just hold onto them until my wardrobe gets more brand in it?

Why are we here? How did we make it here? What the hell is it about these damned silly puffy japanese dresses that has so many girls - and it is not many in the grand scheme of things, but it is enough that it keeps going - locked into this weird little society with all the drama and the scammers and the money exchanging hands? Just what is the deal with lolita? Why am I so into this? Why does it all make me so happy? Is it really making me happy or am I just getting hits off dresses? What would happen if all the dresses turned to ash and that was the end of it? How much would I cry? What's going on? Why do I spend so much time here??

>>7477075
it leaked into irl treatment. have to be vague

>>7479118
I started selling my bodyline after 3 or 4 brand dresses, still some bodyline stuck in my closet but I never wear it... Hard to sell when the shipping is more expensive than the dress

>>7479118
If you sold your shitty dresses you could get money for brand. So I think you should sell

>>7479118
Unless you can buy more brand quickly or don't wear Lolita much, I'd keep at least something to wear until you can build up your brand wardrobe more, at least 2 full coordinates. One burando piece isn't even a coordinate to wear yet. But you could start selling off your most recognizable cheap pieces as a start. Keep the plain things and the things you look best in.

>>7479129
shhhh, anon. let the burando carry you away...

I'm very bad at making friend, and even worse at keeping them.
I had this really good lolita friend, we were from the same comm and we got along really great.
I moved out last year, and since then she became quite e-famous. I know for fact that she is really well-headed and down to earth, but I think she took it a little bit too seriously. We doesn't talk that much anymore, because I'm not good at keeping contacts, but she recently asked me a great favor. As we are friend, I accepted. Later on, I found out she was to travel up to my city for some reasons. I expected her to message me and set up something, but she never did. She hanged out with a few persons, spending all her money and stuff, and when I finally asked her after a week if we could see each other, she said she as no money left to come (in my city transportation is free on week ends). I explained her that I felt a little bit hurt because it was not the first time she didn't think about me while coming over here, but then she acted as if I was the one in fault, because she had so many things to do and I should have asked before.
I really feel offended because thanks to me she can basically have a job she likes, yet she didn't even had the idea of hanging out with me for a coffee or something. She just went out with all her new friends and a few of her 'fans', and didn't even think about just message me so I could tag along or anything.
I must not be that good as a friend apparently. She is really straight forward and sometimes don't really measure her words, so I figured out I could just tell her if I was bothered by her behaviour, but she took it aparently pretty badly, saying that she didn't want to see me that much anymore after that.
It's been at least two or three years we are friend, why do you just put me aside like that ? I guided you into lolita, I introduced you with the comm, I was your friend when you didn't know anybody else, and know I am just this acquaintance two hours away. It hurts.

I haven't done a cosplay in over a year because whenever I have extra money I buy new video games/consoles/rare old games.

>>7479228
My newest buy was LSD dream simulator for 15000yen.

I gave up loli to help pay for my wedding. I feel bad for leaving but i'd feel worse not getting everything right.
Did I do the right thing? :c

>>7479202
awwwww, anon, this is make me so sad!! :c

>>7479345
It depends what makes you happiest. If it were me, I'd hate to say it but I don't think so.
Wedding = 1 day event, then memories.
Lolita = something of an ongoing lifestyle, even if only done occasionally.
You can just start over in Lolita if you miss it though, right?

>>7476443
sorry to tell you this, but you don't exactly sound like you're going to win Miss Personality, yourself. It's really easy to make yourself feel victimized by ~THE INTERNET~, esp. when everyone's anonymous, but your reaction (a mass of anonymous folk blindly judges me over old drama? I'LL DO THE SAME TO THEM ALL, FUCKING TUMBLRTARDS/ SEAGULL CUNTS) kind of makes me question your personality, it sounds a little autistmode. Maybe there are other reasons that people stop talking to you, especially if this victim-complex thing is the side of your personality that you show them.

tbh if it was seven years ago the internet's most likely forgotten about it, we're not *that* starved for new drama.
unless you keep on bringing it up like ITT.

>>7477191
alcohol is a depressant.
that's why after drinking a whole bottle of it, you become a weepy drunk.
if you're not depressed when you're sober, just cut back on the booze.

>>7468424
Wow, anon, you sound like you're me. I'm experiencing everything you've written. I'm talking to a therapist now though, because I'm struggling a lot with depression/anxiety, maybe that's something to look into?

I've been thinking about leaving lolita for a while, but it's mostly because I'm too nervous to wear it anywhere but cons. I live out in the middle of nowhere. I've tried wearing it a couple of times, and there's a lot of hostility here about things. It makes me sad, but it feels stupid to sit on hundreds of dollars of pretty dresses that I barely wear. Especially when I have more fun cosplaying at cons anyway.

>>7479459
Okay, just finished reading the thread and someone already suggested that. If you have a therapist at uni, give it a shot, that's what I did. I'm still struggling, but it's good to have someone to talk to who can tell you you're not just a lazy slob.

Personally, I'm terrified to wear lolita out. I spend a lot of time looking up dresses and picking out things to purchase, I love putting it on and admiring myself, but I feel sick to my stomach thinking about leaving the house. Being noticed by people causes terrible anxiety for me, I feel self-conscious even in slightly "out there" clothes or wearing wigs...I want to wear my frills out so bad, but I just can't, and it just feels like a huge waste of money at this point.

Every time I come to cgl, I feel irritated at the vast number of same lolita threads in comparison to actual cosplay threads. I see so many "request worn", and ita, and Lolita general, and plus size lolita, new dress, etc etc. why are there so many lolita threads? There's a DIY Lolita thread right now. Really? Cosplay and Lolita should be equal here, but all I see are lolita and jfashion threads. Cgl is getting boring and predictable. It's not as fun if you don't care to pay hundreds of dollars for japanese dresses.

>>7479498
Then make cosplay threads yourself?

>>7479498
Right now on the front page I counted:
>8 Cosplay-specific threads
>5 neutral threads (ie makeup, cons, customs)
>1 lolita-specific thread (although Bodyline sells cosplays too so that really should be neutral)
Cry more you big fucking baby.
Or, as the other anon suggested, make your own threads.

>>7479541
What is having an opinion.

>>7479498
Stop complaining. You have convention general and threads for every shitty con, etc. I just counted there are only 34 lolita specific threads

>>7479546
Saying that there are more lolita threads than cosplay is not an opinion, it is factually incorrect. If you said just "I don't like seeing lolita threads, I wish there were more cosplay threads" that'd be an opinion.
Here let me help. http://pbskids.org/arthur/games/factsopinions/

>>7479551
Aww, you can go back to your overpriced fetish and little girl clothing now

>>7479557
It's cute that you think your cartoon character costumes are any less ridiculous than a street fashion. We're all in the same "buncha weirdos" boat as far as 99% of the population is concerned, and I know you are spending (or should be, if you're making anything worth looking at - which you probably aren't) at least as much if not more on your cosplays as I am on dresses.

>>7479557
annnd whatever credibility we were once willing to give you as anonymous goes out the window.

>>7479557
You're just as weird as we are with your roleplaying fetish. Why the hell do you think we have to share board?

>>7479498
Hide the Lolita threads, make and post more in Cosplay threads? That's not terribly difficult. I hide quite a few threads I don't have interest in.

>>7479570
That's actually a good idea. Thank you

A dude friend recently asked me to help him with his first lolita outfit and I'm so fucking ecstatic. I've always wanted to play dress up/stylist for someone, not even necessarily for a guy, though the challenge makes it even more fun. I feel like I'm even more excited for this than the person I'm actually dressing up.

On the other hand, I'm despairing over that fact that it's so freaking hard to find shit that actually fits this guy. I kinda want to tell him to work out so it'll be easier to find stuff but I can also tell he's just a really big-boned person so it would still require plus-sized dresses. Not to mention boleros and cardigans that fit in the shoulders are going to be nearly impossible find. I'm resorting to F+F because it's only place with decent looking stuff with our time/money restraints. I'm pretty determined to make this bro look his best in frills though!!!!

>>7465315
I am sorry to ask such a question but how do you afford so much? Wow.
Also sell some pieces slowly?

>>7479653
How do you think people get money to buy stuff?

>>7479650
There's a couple of nice BL dresses that go quite large, though they're the non print pieces. I've never seen F+F dresses that didn't look off in some way, especially for the price

>>7479662
I checked through them and the few that actually fit him (his chest is 110cm) are out of stock or don't come in his preferred color. I'm personally keeping track of all his options so we may have to go for it if some things don't work out. I mean it still is his money that he's spending so I can't stop him if he doesn't want to go the cheaper route. I can only make sure he doesn't look like a disaster.
Pic related in a custom color is what we're considering, which I'm 98% sure is a design replica of SOMETHING but eh.

>>7479660
I think what they mean is that's at least close to if not more than $20k worth of clothing assuming most/all of it was bought on the average secondhand price

$20k is a lot of fucking money to spend on just clothes
so anon must have a really well paying job or a rich sugar daddy considering most Lolitas are around 17-24 and most people in this age range would be students or just getting out of school, and so the average income for these age groups would be about $10-$40k a yeardepending on if they're working part or full time

>>7479677
Maybe try a direct order with a TB shop like Infanta? I just ordered a dress from them and it should be here sometime next week. So 2 weeks total

>>7479685
>chest is 110
Checked there too, their stuff only goes up to 100cm. I don't think there's any TB shop that does direct order AND custom sizing right?

I feel awful because a friend of mine started a cosplay page full of just wearing underwear and a wig for fan service sake . I want to be nice and support her but in realty I only watch her to laugh at how desperate and whorey she and her group come across. I also tell her ex everything about it and we both laugh because she used to be the type that would never do such things. Meanwhile any of my friends that actually do amazing work get completely ignored. This whole community is so fucked up. I can't tell who is in this as a fan and who is in this because "daddy didn't love her but these neckbeards do"

>>7479679
All you need is to live at home and not have a lot of bills. You don't need a crazy job or a sugar daddy(eye roll). If you live at home and only make say, 500 bucks a paycheck, that's 500 that can mostly go to brand. Acquiring a big closet is a lot more boring than people think.

>>7472591
>Are you me?
>I gave up making friends at uni, I don't really care anymore.

It is a mixture of not caring anymore, being stressed out by even the slightest social interaction/generally being tired, want to be left alone and actiong like a huge bitch towards anyone, and the feeling of being alone and missing out all the awesome stuff my friends experience...

>But I feel really guilty not studying for my exams. Like now. Browsing 4chan an mbok...

Yep, hours and hours upon wasted time. I also missed the opportunity to get into my classes, now I have to beg the professors to accept me; the mere thought of it makes me cry and vomit and hide in a corner. I feel like a failure who cannot even do the simplest Uni stuff.
>How did I even get accepted

>>7479486
>If you have a therapist at uni, give it a shot, that's what I did. I'm still struggling, but it's good to have someone to talk to who can tell you you're not just a lazy slob.

Maybe I will do so next semester. Just need to build up the courage, haha.

>Personally, I'm terrified to wear lolita out.[...] Being noticed by people causes terrible anxiety for me, I feel self-conscious even in slightly "out there" clothes or wearing wigs...

I feel you, Anon, so, so bad. Last time I went out in casual Lolita my mom felt uncomfrotable because of all the stares we got, and asked me how I could stand all this attention. Made me even more nervous... And the thought of going through Uni alone again being a weirdly dressed lonely freak makes me so anxious! Not to mention my mom constantly tells me it is my fault that I am alone because I am dressed in silly clothes; and she has a point.
>Feeling of guilt intensifies x 1000

>I want to wear my frills out so bad, but I just can't, and it just feels like a huge waste of money at this point.

Same here. But I just cannot stop to buy more.

I love the clothes, I just do not love me enough.

I am very fucking mad.
Today was my dad's 60th bday, and my mom wanted to do something so I agreed and such. I mean why not?

She told me it would be a nice lunch at her place, fallowed by cake. Sounded nice.
It was not nice. The part about it being at her place was a lie. It was at the "Yacht Club" that my dad is the commodore off.

This "Yacht Club" is really a private bar, with a shitty dinning room. Whatever I am adult, I don't care about going to a bar.

It does happen to be the only club in the fucking state that allows smoking inside, and I am very, very allergic to cigarette smoke.

And my parents know this, I can't inhale second hand smoke without having an asthma attack.

I should have fucking known, they have been going on and on recently about how it is "SO MUCH BETTER" now that you can't smoke in the dining room! They have a better kitchen now!

Ya no, I go down to my moms house and she goes "OH WE HAVE TO PICK UP THE CAKE" and we all go help her pick it up, and shes like "NO SURPRISE ITS AT THIS SHIT HOLE"

Walking in to the club is hell, everything there smells like smoke, everything, and it does not matter that you can't smoke in the dining room when there is nothing but a non-sealed door between the dining room and the bar with 20 drunks sitting in it smoking at 12pm.

So I did not bring my inhaler.

>>7480076
I somehow sat through lunch, I could not taste anything it just tasted like smoke. I kept having to excuse myself and go outside to have coughing fits.

My parents and my sister just sat there making fun of my for all of lunch, "Its not so bad why are you coughing, stop it" made fun of me for being lactose intolerant "You should just eat it and then take a big shit!" Nice food conversation, also yes that will fix the bloating and rashes I get from lactose, perfect.

BUT WHATEVER, it is my dad's birthday I will fucking sit through this for cake and then we are leaving right?

My dad fucking hates surprises and no one told him about the cake part?
I go for a walk outside after eating, I can barley talk and feel like utter shit, my dad comes with me to 'show me around'... My dad sees my aunt and other people coming and goes to me "Tell me what the fuck is going on or I am going to beat you" I am 23 years old. I play dumb and go back inside.

They decide to have cake and sing happy birthday in the bar. I say I am not going into the bar I can barley stand being in the dining room for 5 min.
"Oh just hold your breath" they say as they fucking drag my ass up there by the arm.

I called a taxi and got the fuck out of there as soon as they let me go. Had an attack waiting for the taxi, one of the bar fucks was nice enough to let me use there inhaler so I made it out of it, Took a train home.

I stink and I am so fucking sick, and suddenly reminded of why I moved out at 19.

Through all of my teen years years I was a massive tomboy, and dressed pretty much exclusively in black, refused to wear dresses or skirts, etc. Now that I'm getting more comfortable with my body and how I look, I want to start dressing on the cute side, like with skirts, over sized sweaters, and OTKs. Pastelbat's (the attached pic is her) style is kind of what I would love to wear. But whenever I put on anything cutesy, I feel really ugly and "man-ish," and I don't feel pretty enough to wear things like skirts and tights. And when I finally got enough courage to wear an extremely casual mori outfit (almost normal-fag) to one of my university classes, my friends thought I was crazy, even my friend that likes mori style clothing.

I just want to be a cute girl, /cgl/.

>>7479653
Basically, what this anon said. >>7479794
Though I no longer live with my family, even after paying my bills and setting aside money each month, I have about $500 of disposable income to play with. Some months more, some less.

I've also been buying lolita for a fairly long time. Even when I was just working part time, if I saved up checks, I could get a few items a month on auctions for cheap. Then, when I graduated and got a full-time job, I was able to buy a few more pieces a month and so on. I also don't really buy 'normal' clothes all that often (the last time I bought new jeans was over three years ago, for example), because the people I work for require a strict dress code. Black slacks and shoes, plain colour button down or top. Then on weekends, since I don't go out much any more, jeans and t-shirt if I'm not in lolita.

To keep on topic with the original confession, I haven't made that many new sales since my last post in this thread, but I've picked a few more pieces that are going into the sell pile. A couple of JSKs and an ancient skirt that hasn't fit me in a couple of years.

>>7474248
>>7474253
These only manifest after a long ass period of time. Unless anon develops an ED, it's very unlikely that she'd keep that diet for long enough for that to happen. Hell, I was put into treatment for anorexia at a BMI of ~14 before I started losing hair or periods.

>>7474230
>>7474268
The fatigue part is real, though. And the stress. Oh, anon, the stress. AND the cravings? Your body starts to crave all sorts of random shit because you're not getting enough nutrients.
Then you'll binge like a bitch because your body will shut your mind up so it can eat and feed itself. Then you might go into bulimic habits that will destroy your teeth, knuckles, stomach... might also cause acid reflux etc.

Don't put yourself through an starvation diet, it doesn't work and, to be honest (because if you're browsing pro-ana you don't have a lot of love for yourself, and this might be the only thing that'll keep you from going into this hole): you may even put yourself through hell and still not lose any weight.

>>7480210
I kno that feel so bad
I managed to start wearing tights but only because I feel too uncomfortable wearing pants. Not I dress only in oversize black men's shirts, shorts, tights (usually ripped because I don't care enough) and docs. I get approached by all sorts of "rock" bros and it's annoying.

I somehow wound up in ageplay and I keep having this creeping feeling of awkward when I see Lolita and some of the things (OTT Sweet and such) really gets me in a young frame of mind suddenly. Like, I love Sweet. I hated the 'sweet is ageplay' shit that ran around.
But I can almost see it in some parts when I squint. And I feel horrible.

>>7480210
I get that same feeling. I never wore a drop of makeup, so putting even colored lipbalm on makes me feel like a drag queen. Wearing cute shit is hard.

Just try wearing little things as first. A cute hairpin or necklace, then nice blouses, and keep moving up to incorporate more things into your daily wardrobe. Gradual transitions help.

>>7479826
> Not to mention my mom constantly tells me it is my fault that I am alone because I am dressed in silly clothes; and she has a point.

Don't let her get to you, anon! You can dress crazy and still make friends, it's probably more anxiety getting in the way than anything else.

> the thought of going through Uni alone again being a weirdly dressed lonely freak makes me so anxious!

Definitely feel this - I study in a field that's full of dudes in Jeans and T-Shirt, Lolita would make me stand out like crazy. Maybe it'll be easier depending on how your classmates are dressed?

> I love the clothes, I just do not love me enough.
This, so much.

>>7479444

That's because it's Nia.
She has been on this same train for years pretending to be innocent and constantly whining about no one liking her. People would stop caring if she would drop her constant self victimizing to try to stay relevant. I can't block her now that she dropped trip unfortunately.

>>7480076
>>7480088

Thanks to people overblowing their little run ins with being uncomfortable for 10 mins I can never take post like this serious.

The entire time I'm thinking:
>nope your mom told you and you forgot or she didn't tell you cause you'd be a bad person and skip out on your father's birthday instead of suggesting other venues like a grown adult.
>your dad has a boat? Now nice for you.
>Only club in the state the allows smoking inside? Haha no, probably not
>You're not allergic and need an inhaler. Smoke just makes your nose go a little haywire like it does to most people
>Borrowed an inhaler...someone else's medicine. Ew.


I wish I believed this stuff but people shouting their self diagnoses as excuses, blowing a little doctor visit into something life threatening, and talking about their special medications within 10 mins of meeting you have ruined it.

>>7480076
>>7480088
How is this relevant to the thread topic of cosplay and lolita confessions?

This is just a general free form rant.

>>7480799
>>7476660
wrong. cute try though.
>>7479444
so, sissy fetishist it is then.
Brolita Jenny Still around? It'll make his life.

>>7480088
Yeah your family is shit, but you say there and put your own health at risk, so what the fuck. You should of just left. Who cares of they are your family. They obviously don't care about you or life threatening health issues . Wow

>>7480867
Nono. Donate the dresses to the costuming department of a local high school or youth theatre troupe or something. Brolita Jenny is just as much of a fucking nutjob as the lolitas he harasses.

I'm doing a payment plan for a girl who added me on Facebook. Except she keeps tagging me and liking and commenting on ALL of my fucking photos, some from almost one year ago. It's creeping me out and I'm close to just refunding her.

>>7479444
Yea. This person sounds incredibly self-important but in a really awkward vaguely autismal way reminds me of the girl who made that dumbshit "famous friend" poem on youtube

>>7476279
>go towards children
What in the fuck? They aren't going to FIT children. Hilarious mental imagery right now of 6yo girls swimming around in burando down to their ankles...
I feel like you haven't thought this through and are trolling.

>>7480884
Untag yourself and delete comments on older photos. She'll get the hint. Facebook adds like this are awkward. I set them as 'aquaintaince' since my posting privacy is set to 'friends except acquaintances' and I manually approve anything I'm tagged in. The likes, not so much you can do but she won't see most future things if you do the acquaintance thing.

>>7476279
1 wardrobe of a lone lolita.
No one's going to give 2 shits where your stuff goes if you die.
Yet you feel the need to tell us (the horrible community) about it here. If you loathe us so much stfu and gtfo and go make some tea or something.
That's funny. And pathetic.

>>7480867

You literally always have the same stories so it's painfully obvious.
Let it go sis.

>>7480881
I did donate a couple to costuming departments actually, my innocent world that didn't fit.
I was swimming in the long versions of the JSks, they made a cute production with them.

>>7477202
My response to people who "hur hur where's your sheep lol hurrrr" is always:

"I LEFT THEM AT HOME BECAUSE I WAS WORRIED SOME JERK LIKE YOU WOULD WANT TO FUCK THEM."

It's childish of me, I know, but I like to see the looks on their faces when I do it.

>>7481136
wow, some IW would definitely make great costumes

that's awesome, anon!

>>7479650
If he's already a big boned dude, better make double sure his wig, makeup, shoes and a custom fit dress are all 200% within the limits of good taste. Otherwise you'll just turn him unto another cross-dresser that looks like a frilly sissy.
The fashion certainly doesn't need any more of those!

>>7479650
Neat. I told a female friend of mine that I wanted to cosplay Rui and she's bending over backwards to help me do it.

I'm going to look horrible (I'm small but I have an awful face) but damn, she seems to be having a lot of fun with it.

My confession: I really don't like or ever want to associate with brolitas. Where I live, as in many places, public MTF cross dressing is still very much a taboo and I resent working very hard on my fashion only to be judged by the stubbly-faced boys in badly styled wigs that make up the majority of brolitas. There are one or 2 good brolitas who are trans and become Lolitas (that I know of) and they already pass and the funny ones who do it as a prank or to film are humorous and it isn't so bad. But the majority of others that I've seen so far can GTFO as far as I'm concerned because they are either creepy cross dressers, sissies, fetishists or boys just doing it for the 'look at me 3edgy5you' attention. No. I don't accept that.

I've completely stopped believing anything my lolita pal says.

>>7481713
why is that?

>>7481205
But mtf trans aren't actually brolitas , right?

>>7481720

Long story short; her guy has this paranoid notion that she's going to cheat on him with us, us being my girlfriend and myself, so he tells her to lie about not feeling well so that she'll stay at home. The only reason I know this is because last time it happened, she told him to knock it off because she was tired of being stuck at home.

>>7481825
>>7481166
Pride and Prejudice in innocent world. I'll never forget it.
at first I felt bad, but I've always had enough money where I never needed to re-sell things. (too lazy anyway, just seem to buy and hoard)

but a classic lolita pride and predjudice in a couple of innocent world's long jsks was pretty cool to see.

you're pretty cool anon, I need to get over my hatred of the community, or at least move to some place where people wont recognize me-we do have a newer generation of girls who don't know or care

to be honest, I couldn't really donate them to a brolita, they sicken me, that was just me being bitter.
and just being accused of being other people (who are undoubtedly going through the same thing)
made me even more upset, because this still happens.

>>7480867
you're just proving my point, man.
if you've managed to accumulate any kind of worthwhile wardrobe at all, you're hopefully mature/capable enough to work and support yourself as well as your hobbies.
but aimlessly vindictive behavior like what you're describing doesn't support that theory at all.
you're not 'getting back' at the people who wronged you. no1curr, except for, 'wow what a lot of money you've wasted' and whatever theater department/brolita you toss your old dresses at. you just sound mad (and way too invested in these supposed slights from people you don't even know and will probably never meet. how does some troll on an online forum affect your life? it doesn't. why are you taking it out on everyone that's associated with that forum? do you ask yourself these questions? you seriously think that any summerfag who stumbles onto /cgl/ is going to the trouble to dredge up shit that happened in 2007? I would hate to be in your head.)

>>7481825
>polyamorous
>mad at girl with abusive boyfriend who makes her lie
Everything about this is gross

>>7482219

Where did I say I was polyamorous? I don't fuck people I'm not attracted to, and I'm not attracted to her. It's that fucking simple.

I also never said I was mad at her, just that I can't believe what she says anymore. I think it's a natural fucking reaction to be disappointed in someone who can't tell someone across the country to get over his paranoia.

3/10 for making me reply.

>>7481732
I don't consider them to be brolitas, as long as they actually live as female and aren't just saying it or treating it like a fetish.

I fighting the horrible urge to just cut myself up in places to make myself thinner. I want to wear lolita and cute clothes without thinking how horribly fat my legs/arms are.

>>7482697
Same anon, same. I just try to tell myself the slow route of exercise and diet will look far better.

Sometimes, I wear my bloomers backwards.

My dresses will kind of pumpkin out in the back (unless it's a heavier dress and I'm wearing multiple petticoats, then it hardly makes any difference at all) I guess from my butt + the ruffles on the back of my bloomers pushing too much on the petticoat. I used to gather more organza to the front of the waist band, but then you always have to wear your petti the same exact direction or redo it again. So I just wear my bloomers backwards sometimes to even it out, and it does the trick. I just feel weird doing it...

>>7483199
that's pretty smart anon. I get the problem of my skirt looking flat in the front and my petti trying to go in between my legs sometimes, I should probably vest in some bloomers and do what you do.

>>7481732
Right, they are in transition, just Lolitas. If men transition & take hormones young enough, they will become more feminine but older ones may not, so even if post-op trans, may still look like cross-dressing men. Still, there are very few actually transitioning people that I know of and most are just cross-dressing for whatever reason. Some like or tolerate brolitas, others do not.

>>7483199
That's pretty smart, I think I'm actually gonna try that. No shame anon! Not like anyone's gonna see it.

Lolita has changed how I handle my appearance.
I used to never care about makeup or anything like that, but now, I take care of my skin, put on makeup, etc. I want to be as pretty as the dresses I buy.

>>7463816
I'm almost 33 but started really getting into cosplay around 2009. Getting more responsibilities with work and relationships start to pull on either your finances or/and your time.

>>7484527
That really sucks. You missed out big time on the earlier times in the late 90s

>>7484010
you and me both anon

>>7484010

Same here.

I used to shit on my skin, but now i try to take care of it. I know it's one of my best assets so I want to preserve it as much as possible. Weirdly enough, this has caused me to actually wear no makeup when I go to work and save the makeup for outings, because I'm superstitious like that.

But I try to moisturise my skin as much as possible now and keep it clean. Luckily it's low maintenance, but I also need to get into the habit of wearing sunblock so it lasts longer.

>>7484560

Also, I had the weirdest dream that I tried the tape you use for monolids, and ended up getting something like really saggy and ugly triple lids. I tried so many creams to make it go back to what it originally was, but it kept getting worse and worse until it looked like I had craggy creases both over and under my eye.

Shit was weird. I think I was reading the skin care thread too much.

I went through a bad breakup when I was younger, and lost all of my friends do to it.
I never cheated, I just made all of my friends through him.

so when I had the time, I would draw tons of pictures of guro lolitas, and write stories of how shiro lolitas would murder my ex's new crushes and try to destroy his life so he'd be forced to come back to me, coming out as lovely guro lolitas, who kept their guro dresses as trophies.

It was yandere as fuck.
I still like those stories/drawings because it was a cool concept, a shiro/guro lolita murder crew.

I begged my family to get me help and they never did. it took me three years to get over it.

Ever since I'm been wearing jfash and lolita, guys have actually started noticing me, but I don't know how to feel about it. I've never been asked out before or even have anyone express interest in me before this year, so I'm pretty sure it was due to my clothing choice change.

>Be in high school, dressed like a complete loser/weeb
>started to get better during college
>A year and a half or so ago cut my hair boy short and started dressing a lot more fashionable, albeit really tomboyish
>looking better gave me confidence
>/feels good man
>end of last year, decide i can dress myself well enough to get into lolita/jfash and decided to start growing out hair again
>new semester, decide to wear mori or otome-esque outfits
>Couple weeks ago got asked out by friend who I really don't find attractive
>Awkwardly declines with nervous laughter and practically runs away

On one hand, it's nice to know I may not die forever alone after all, but on the other I forget that you tend to attract the people that you don't want to attract when you start actually looking attractive. It doesn't really help that I have abnormally high standards for looks someone that's literally never dated before. Also most males make me anxious.

This might sound kinda stupid but I got the idea from a friend to set up a "fake boyfriend" to drive away people that I meet who I don't want liking me. Essentially her name on my phone is a male's and she may periodically send selcas of a specific guy and talk to me if I ever need it.

>captcha: Butterfly onSome
not so much on others

not cgl related but I currently have my phone turned off so a friend of mine can't reach me
because when we ran into each other by accident the other day, we made plans to go grab coffee today because we haven't seen each other in ages
but the truth is I don't actually like her enough to want to hang out with her, but I'm too much of a pussy to say it to her when she seems to like my company so much
so instead I make excuses and turn my phone off and lie about my new address etc
I'm a horrible person, but girl, honestly, it was nice being your classmate and I have nothing personal against you but I just don't really like hanging out with you that much

>>7485932
>I'm a horrible person, but girl, honestly, it was nice being your classmate and I have nothing personal against you but I just don't really like hanging out with you that much


why can't you say that? it might hurt a little but it probably hurts her more to feel strung along by you. plus you said you didn't want to hang out with her anymore, so there doesn't even have to awk interaction after that.

>>7484573
Yeah, he was definitely the issue. Not you

I have the worst body image. I think I'm unattractive, and I see myself as fat even though I know in my head I'm not ("recovered" anorexic), and I absolutely loathe photos of myself. This makes cosplaying so hard. I love dressing up and meeting people, but looking at photos of myself in costume really depresses me. I don't want to be cosplay "famous" or anything, but I'd like to be able to show off what I've done without hating myself more. I wish I could afford heaps of plastic surgery; I would change literally everything about myself if I could.

Less cgl-related, but it's ruining my relationship. I hate that my boyfriend is stuck with such an ugly girl and want to leave so he can be with someone he's actually really attracted to physically. I can't even have sex with him with the lights on anymore, I feel so guilty that he has to look at me.

>>7485588
You sound really mature

>>7486003
can you recognize negative patterns reforming? it doesn't matter if you're "recovered", this sort of thing never goes away forever without a trace. if you're not talking to somebody about what you're feeling, please do - your boyfriend at least, if not a therapist or counselor. Don't let things get worse and worse, okay? Get some help now.

>>7486009
I'm seeing a counselor at a clinic for people without insurance, but it really hasn't done me much good, or at least it doesn't feel like it. She wants me to get on anti-depressants, so I'm trying to find a cheap psychiatrist to help me there. I just feel like I'm never going to be happy with myself. But thanks, I am seeing people about it and will keep trying for a while.

>>7486040
i'm so glad to hear that anon, i was really worried for you. just keep with it, maybe anti-depressants might help. i hate those low income clinics though, ugh, we had to go into them for the past few years.

i keep wanting to give advice but you've been through this before and i doubt i could say anything new. hang in there anon, people care about you.

I'm 5'2" and 115-120 pounds. I get a lot of flak in cosplay from some people for being fat. I know I'm not, but it still really gets to me.
I used to weigh close to 100 before I started cosplaying. Being surrounded by new awesome cosplay friends pulled me out of depression and my hermit lifestyle so I put on weight. My mother is a doctor and she always assures me my weight is ideal and much better than how thin I used to be.
It's hard to feel proud of this accomplishment when people say I look fat, even if I was called too thin beforehand. I feel like there's no middle ground.
I know I should be happy about my accomplishment getting to a healthy weight, but I'm just not with how many times I hear that I'm fat. I've started straying from bikinis and stuff now too. I want to do cosplays that show belly or more arm but I'm too scared of fat comments.

>>7486085
You need more muscle mass. You're what is known as skinny fat. You look small in clothing but big(ger) out of it.
There's a reason why you'll see fit women who are say 5'5 and 160lbs but look like a size 4 .

>>7486094
Well, I was a swimmer for years, and I eat fine and exercise. I have birthing hips though haha, and muscular upper arms, but a small chest.
I guess it's that I look disporportionate? Because of my thighs, I suppose. But that's hereditary and I'm not sure I can fix that. :/
When I did work out more regularly, I just started looking more bulky. Maybe I was doing something wrong. I just wanna be skinny skinny but I think that might be unachievable for my body type...

>>7486085
anon above is a little harsh, but right - working out will help you look fit. your weight is probably really good for you! but if you feel uncomfortable and want to be more fit-looking instead of just a fit-size, i'd say to go for some exercise (lifting weights is the best way to get looking good) and you'll probably notice a difference (any weight you gain will be muscle mass, but it'll look good on you so don't look at the scale). check out the /fit/ sticky if you want some good tips to start with.
by the way, being scared of fat comments is so sad to hear. it's being scared that other people can't be polite and decent human beings, even to your face.

>>7486102
aww, i commented too soon and didn't see this, lol ignore me above.

work with your body and not against it - if skinny skinny isn't for you, it just isn't. i noticed the other day that my hips are actually really wide and i probably would have thigh gap if i lost weight - but, i also carry my weight mostly in my bust, hips, and thighs. even if i was skinny, my weight would probably be there to prevent thigh gap. that's not on me! that's my body. and if someone else has a problem with that ugh, who cares.
btw, maybe it was your perception that made you feel bulky? was it before you gained some weight? the muscle might've looked odd on a more underweight frame...

>>7486120
It was before I gauned weightn I thought I looked good, but my mother told me I looked sick because my ribs and collar bone showed.
Now they don't (or at least not nearly as much. They're still visible if I turn my torso or something) but now most of the mostly is in my legs since I like to go for runs on the weekends.
Is it possible to work out to tone and lean muscle without gaining more on top of it? I'm bad at this. x3
I'll check the pther forum though!
Thanks for all the advice anons.

>>7486127
Muscle* not mostly. Omg my typing sucks today. :(

>>7486127
>Is it possible to work out to tone and lean muscle without gaining more on top of it?
Nope. "Toning" isn't an actual thing, it's just a way of marketing building muscle to women without actually using the word muscle since it's seen as too masculine. If you're already lean, which you sound like you are, muscle will look good on you; you won't look bulky or anything. Be sure to read the sticky on /fit/. http://liamrosen.com/fitness.html

"Are you just trying to "tone up"? Lift weights. "Toning" is kind of a nonsense term, because you don't actually "tone" anything. You can only lose fat and gain muscle, and lifting weights helps you do both, by burning calories and promoting muscle growth. Like I said before, you get huge by eating huge, not lifting weights; lifting just determines how much of your weight is muscle vs. fat."

>>7486141
shout out to that sticky, helped me learn more about exercise. and made me super pissed off at exercise that's marketed to women.

>>7486085
I can't imagine someone your weight being fat.

These people sound like fucking asswipes.

>>7486006
I've been a sheltered shut-in for nearly two decades, it tends to stunt your maturity level.
But seriously, I know I'm immature, I just don't really know how to deal when it comes to certain things. I panic and get anxious really easily so I tend to avoid shit in the first place. I try to tell myself that avoidance isn't really a great way to deal with things, but I just keep doing it and don't know how to fix it???? The actual practice is is a lot harder than the concept for me.

>>7486001
not sure if that was sarcasm, because I know It was my fault, I was just too envious of his accomplishments.
I took it horribly, because sudden lost contact to your entire social network, really, really sucks.
I just wish didn't lose all my friends. I wish I had at least one.

>>7483199
going to do this from now on
hate a huge butt bump

>>7486159
She's the healthy weight for someone 3" taller than her.

I can see her being maybe a little chubby, but definitely not fat.

But you know cosplay snobs, if you're not ana-chan, you're not thin enough.

I haven't done any real cosplay for close to a year now because of reasons (tldr depression, not taking care of myself, meds, yadda yadda 4chan is not my blog nobody cares). Last weekend I wore my Black Widow for the first time in over a year and I feel like a fucking stuffed sausage with all the weight I've gained.

I can't seem to motivate myself to do anything about it. Help me, /cgl/. Tear me a new one so I'll get my ass to the gym.

>>7486862
You could stand to tone up a little if that's what you want, but you're being entirely too hard on yourself. Your figure looks cute the way it is.

>>7486823

Pic related, body stuff. My tummy and sides are my problems areas more than my thighs are, I think.
I just want to look okay in bodysuits and stuff because I want to do more comic book cosplays. I'm not proud of a 28 inch waist at all.

I have a fabulous coordinate all worked out for AATP Midsummer Night's Dream.
Only problem is -- my only JSK of the print is a replica. Not a good one either. On close inspection you can tell the print's magenta layer is pretty off and the bows looked terribad, but I sewed some new ones.
I'm really scared of being 'judged' for wearing it to a meetup or a convention. But at the same time, I have what I think are some really great accessories lined up to complement it and there's nothing else in my wardrobe that would complement them like this replica.
I bought it a couple years back when print re-releases were totally unheard of. If I had known that the brand would make it available again in the future, I would have just saved up my money...

>>7486875
Thank you, I appreciate that. I'm just kind of shellshocked because I just remeasured myself for the first time in a while and my measurements are 36-31-41 when they used to be 35-27-38...and I'm only 5'7." I've gained close to twenty pounds over the past year and a half and I'm just horrified at myself.

Part of me is being rational and saying that I'm still at a healthy-ish weight, that now that I have my brain chemicals balanced again I can work it off, that I can always reread the /fit/ sticky and get myself to a gym, etc...but the rest of me is too busy going "I'M ON MY WAY TO WHALEDOM WHY EVEN TRY" I need a goddamn slap to the face.

when I wore brand for the first time out, I was so nervous I ended up puking.
I scraped together the money to buy a dress, and coorded it the best I could. I felt really great, first brand. I hoped this would help me fit in with the girls of my comm, because they've scolded me publicly for owning a replica (got it secondhand for $30, not that bad)
photos of me that were taken at the meetup, and put on the groups facebook page.
and I was put into an ita thread.
a couple minutes later, other people were like "oh my god, I remember her, her outfit was so boring, lrn2coord"
my comm is small.. I don't think they knew I used /cgl/
my outfit was dull, but not Ita..
they tore my outfit apart, from everything to my leggings, hair accessories, and said "I caked on the blush so much I looked like a whore"
In reality, I was actually really anxious, and my face was bright red the entire day because I was so nervous.

I haven't gone to a meetup since. Its just one of those things where I don't care about fitting in if all they'll do is ridicule me regardless. at least give me constructive concrit.

I've begun to think all lolita communities are like this.

My standards are way too low apparently, and people from my comm started to think I'm just putting on a "nice girl" act, when in reality I genuinely don't give a shit.

I've seen it on /cgl/ too a lot. Everything always has to be made extreme with them. When someone has a few zits they go "eeeewwww what a pizzaface", an okayish coord becomes an ita disaster, a slightly chubby girl is a "massive fug landwhale", a girl is called Nose (her name's Rose) even if her nose is perfectly average, and if you dare say that you like something about yourself or merely accept it the way it is, they'll unleash the rage at you because HOW DARE YOU BRAG LIKE THAT YOU ARE SOOOO STUCK UP.

I thought it was only 4chin but no, it's like the world collectively forgot about the concept of moderation and being average. They always seem to go to extremes for the sake of argument, on purpose.

>>7486925
I have got to say, it was probably ita. If there is just a generally boring or unimpressive coord, its usually posted in nitpick threads. If you were legitimately posted in an ita thread and nobody disagreed - you looked ita.

Girls nowadays seem to have forgotten what 'moderation', 'different strokes' and 'average' are. To them, if you're not 100% absolutely perfect they nitpick the shit out of you, and if you say you don't care they tell you that you're an asshole for not caring about [insert tiny flaw here]. It's like if you're not looking at your body under the microscope and pointing what's ugly about you, you're wrong and stuck up and "have to be taught your place".

Girls in my comm started saying I am just "putting on a nice girl act" when in reality I don't give a shit about their crazy standards. I'm there to talk about lolita, not how I forgot to paint my nails and feel "sooo ugly" because of it. I've seen it on /cgl/ too a lot. Everything always has to be made extreme with them. When someone has a few zits they go "eeeewwww what a pizzaface", an okayish coord becomes an ita disaster, a slightly chubby girl is a "massive fug landwhale", a girl is called Nose (her name's Rose) even if her nose is perfectly average, and if you dare say that you like something about yourself or merely accept it the way it is, they'll unleash the rage at you because YOU ARE SOOOO STUCK UP.

I thought it was only 4chin but no, it's like the world collectively forgot about the concept of moderation. They always seem to go to extremes on purpose to pick a fight. Once I completely accidentally said I have a slim nose (we were talking about plastic surgery and I said I didn't want any) and they started nitpicking: "Ummmm, I wouldn't say slim? More like... A weirdly high nose bridge? You would really benefit from some shaving off I think?" (Valley girl intonation and all). Another girl once said she had long legs (which she) and they went: "I think you should wear poofier skirts to hide the bowlegs". She doesn't even have bowlegs.

It's just annoying as fuck.

>>7486952
>(which she)
which she did*

>>7486947
this was before the ita threads had rules.
you sound new.
a while back ita threads where just plain or oldschool coords, until people got tired of it.

my leggings were solid color (white) they complained how plain they were. thats all they could do. my outfit wasn't ita.

>>7486952
This.
/cgl/ destroyed my self-esteem and made me feel like an ugly landwhale, when I know in reality I'm average. Nothing more, nothing less. Just average. But apparently average is horribad and must be condemned.

>>7486952
The girls in your comm sound like complete dickheads, holy shit. How do you stand being around them?

But seriously, /cgl/ got me to the point where I evaluate myself based on "what would /cgl/ say if I got posted there?" It's awful.

>>7487412
Only reason I can stand being around them is because I'm older, hang out with the normal lolis from the comm and know that they're doing it because they feel like shit about themselves. They aren't kicked out because they're all creators of the comm, but I've been in it for years and have had fucking enough of their charade.

>>7474230
You won't lose weight, love. Your body will go into starvation mode and store all calories as fat to keep you alive. If it gets bad, (and, it will) your body might start to eat itself. You will not be active. You will want to sleep all the time. You will pass out. You might get a concussion from passing out, as I did. Youll be in the hospital all the time, and theyll pump fluids into you. They might stick a tube into your stomach. Im not saying this to scare you, these are all facts. Dont fuck with eating disorders. They arent fun. They wont make you gorgeous and thin or interesting, they wont make you lovely. Theyll make you have no friends, a wrecked body and fuck up your mind and concepts of food, weight, and life in general. I hope you read this. Good luck.

>>7486952
but why do you think they're like that, anon? do you think girls spontaneously decided to do this all of a sudden? or do you think that the way that girls are increasingly marketed to by judging their flaws might be hurting them? do you think the amount of attention the world has decided to pay to women's looks and bodies might make them feel self-conscious in increasingly negative and destructive ways?

if you're called fat, or someone laughed at your teeth or if you are self conscious about your bad skin, what are you going to do? use skincare products, whiten your teeth, watch your diet & exercise. guess what? those things cost money. those things are marketed to women, and in a damaging way. those things are advertised by telling you that you're not worthy of being the person you want to be, but you will be if you do and buy one more thing to supplement your appearance. girls can't feel empowered about themselves if there's constantly something to be doing to "improve" their appearance. and it's all just appearance! you know, not accomplishments, not things to be proud of. if you think that this extreme self-consciousness, that is undeniable in modern culture the way it has never been in the past, isn't affecting the way girls think about themselves and treat each other, you're blantantly ignoring any chance to reverse the trend.

>>7486918
different anon here. that's how I felt sometime last year, not bothering to try (I was already depressed). now I've put on an extra 50 lbs because of stress-eating due to school. I feel terrible every day and every time I start eating better and working out, I binge again and completely give up. I don't go anywhere but class and I don't wear anything but jeans and baggy tshirts.
Really, you should start now. It'll be so much easier. Last week I started working out again and I've been doing okay, but I really really wish I'd started this after I'd gained just 20 lbs.

Less of a confession and more of an opinion but:

I think non-prints with nice details and materials, or simple/prints only on the skirt(or at most sweet/classic floral type) are best in terms of aging well.
As in a lot of prints(particularily a lot of what AP produces, and sometimes baby as well) while not looking ageplay, look juvinille on girls mid twenties+ though the less sugary sweet the print, the better it is. Also helps if the girl looks really young.(like that one 30 yr old ott sweet chick, though outside of photos it would be kind of weird)

It's sort of on par with normalfag older women who are wearing hotopic "Kiss it if u like it" or booty shorts and make up they wore as a teen except less cringey and better quality.
It's not ageplay, but it doesn't look good.