/cgl/ - Cosplay & EGL

I wish there was a way to effectively ban all fatties and itas without stirring shit up.

I really wish some lolita meets could be camera free.

I don't like having my photo taken and it's getting to the point were I don't want to go to meets when I know particular girls will be going as they're camera nazi's who don't understands the word 'No'.

I just don't feel the need to document everything I do.

>>7409648
Maybe there's some way to get the cameras banned until the very end of the meet so people can leave if they don't want pics taken of them? You can't be the only person there that dislikes photos.

On topic, I need to figure out some way to subtly transition into wearing more mori and ouji on a regular basis. I'm so shy just suddenly wearing j-fashion all the time really intimidates me. I'm in a conservative small town too, so the only out of the ordinary people are emo/scene teenagers.

>>7409648
I relate. I accept the occasional cute phone picture, but are full photoshoots really necesary just because you finally got out of your cave and did something remotely social?

>>7409648
I love taking meet photos but it's always more than ok if someone just doesn't want their photo taken, either that day or ever. Why does it have to be a thing, can't they just skip you for photos if you don't want to be in any?

I've been struggling with my gender for years now, and I'm thinking of just shoving it to the side and being an unhappy cis-woman. I just don't feel "wrong" enough in my own body to warrant transitioning, but I don't feel "right" either. I guess tumblr would define me as gender fluid? I'm not sure, but it's a bunch of extra stress that drives me crazy. Thanks for listening, /cgl/, I needed somewhere to rant.

>>7409849
What about it are you struggling with? It could just be that you're unhappy with it due to the perception of gender based on cultural norms. That's pretty normal if so, gender isn't defined by cultural norms so chances are you just feel like you're different when you just don't want to feel different than how you think you should be.

The tumblr definition of that sort of thing is vague and biased, they consider cultural norms the defining point of gender and it's just ignorant.

>>7409849
Honestly? Change the things that you are unhappy with and stick to what you love. If you're uncomfortable being female, you don't have to become 100% Schwarzenegger to be "legit" trans. You'll get shit from people who think you should stick to the binary and be ultra femme or ultra masc with no in-between, but if you're happier being a mismatched jumble of different gendered elements, then go for it. YOU'RE the one that has to live in your body for the rest of your life. You might as well enjoy it. Try not placing as much importance on what others expect you to be and concentrate on what you want out of life.

>>7409870
You're full of shit. I hate you people who think that trans people don't have to be dismorphic. This is the reason all these transtrenders exist, if you define gender by just fucking slapping on boy outfit you can fuck right off. Also, there are only gender binaries.

>>7409873
Nice try. I'm trans, taking hormones and saving for surgery. I stick to the binary because it suits me, but I understand that other people have different comfort levels. If somebody doesn't feel the need to chemically or surgically alter their body to feel comfortable in it, more power to them. I'm not going to shit on somebody's gender identity because they haven't got surgery or hormones or they keep some elements of their birth sex. I am eternally grateful to the people who respected me and my pronouns when I was pre-everything and had nothing to show for my identity, and I think the same treatment should be extended to others. I'm emotionally ravaged by not having the correct parts and need to cut my body to pieces to feel better and it sucks ass, I wouldn't wish gender dysphoria on anyone and I don't think it's a requirement to be ~*~TRUE LEGIT TRANS FUCK ALL Y'ALL FAKERS STEP OUTTA MY WAY~*~.

>>7409908
>nice try. i'm trans
That doesn't mean your not wrong. This whole gender thing is getting way out of hand. The west is being taught too much bullshit about what gender is and means, they look at it based on social norms rather than body or desired body traits and make up all this shit about how gender isn't one thing or the other and it's ~fluid~ no it's fucking not. You're an idiot for thinking that, and even more of an idiot for thinking that and being trans, you should know better. But maybe you were taught wrong by some ignorant fuck, the same kind of ignorant fuck that things terms like 'third-gender' mean some magical gender that doesn't exist, rather than what it really means which is just trans. Trans is a legitimate issue, dysmorphia only though. If you are uncomfortable being called a girl if you don't want a dick then you've simply given in to a cultural stereotype like a fucking moron.

>be bald

"Oh just cosplay Agent 47/Sundowner/other bald dude"

>be 5'8 manlet

"Awww, aren't you cute? When will you ever learn?"

A bunch of cosplay friends I just made are trying to put together a KPOP "Host Club" dance/event after the school year ends. I don't mind not being a part of it, I would've declined if they asked (I don't find the appeal in those type of events), but it just feels shitty to be the only one in the "group" who didn't even know/wasn't asked about it.

I'm thinking of just blocking all these people from my newsfeed. I tried hard to befriend all of them and just keep getting shut down and ignored. Seeing them all converse with each other and make plans to hang out doesn't make things better.

>>7409857
>>7409870
Part of the reason I'm so hesitant to consider transitioning is because I'm not sure how much of what I'm feeling is true disphoria, and how much of it is due to cultural gender norms. For instance, I can't stand my breasts, to have them feels wrong, but on the other hand I love to dress up, put on make up and feel pretty. And then I'm in a field with next to no women workers (mech engineering) and I constantly hear women congratulating me on getting into a "male field," and I feel I would be betraying them if I ended up being trans.

>>7410079
That's what I mean - you should try to cut back on worrying about what others expect of you. People will always feel "betrayed" when you defy their expectations, no matter who you are and what you're doing. Listen to yourself and concentrate on what you think and feel. Everybody likes being dressed up and feeling attractive, that's not inherently female. I mean look at how many cis brolitas and trapfriends frequent this board. You're the only one who can decide what to do in this situation, but being afraid to transition because you won't fit into a 100% masculine ideal, or being afraid to "betray" feminist friends won't help make you any happier with yourself, and will only drive you away from exploring your own thoughts/feelings as legitimate.

>>7410117
Thank you for the encouragement anon, it's super nice to be able to just spill out my feelings somewhere.

>>7410079
Do you have large or small breasts? It sort of seems like you could just hate your breasts, which can be fixed with a reduction. Are you unhappy with your entire female body? Do you want to have a male body instead? If so then by all means go for it and continue being you. If you want to be a man you'll be a man whether you dress pretty or not, but if you don't want to be a man you could just feel uncomfortable with how your woman body looks, large breasts could be the issue. Everyone has problems with how they look, but not all of them boil down to switching genders, and not all of them have a solution. Some people aren't happy in their own skin and won't be happy in it ever.

>>7410135
No, they're actually quite small, it's just that they're there at all, and not flat. If I could suddenly grow a penis I would be very happy as well. My ideal situation (you know, if you could go back and change the past) would be to be born as an androgynous boy. Maybe what's holding me back is all the "masculinity" bullshit that's attached to being a guy. Logically I know it's bullshit, but I feel like if I transitioned that's how it would be.

>Dat feel when the cringe thread gets taken down
>Dat feel when it was on my list of favorite thread
I feel like we should have a funeral, and then maybe try to resurrect it

>>7410149
Then I understand you. I used to think I was trans but it turns out I really just wanted to stop caring about gender roles. It seems to me you actually want to be a guy. I'm not a typical girl, but then there is no typical girl, there shouldn't be a typical guy for you either. People might give you shit, but they would even if you were just being yourself, and you have to just remember that you're happy because you're being yourself. Happiness comes from within not from others' justifications of what you could or should be. For the most part people are just doing as they are taught and it's hard to unlearn. Don't take things too personally and don't let other people define who you are.

>>7410127

Don't transition, you'll regret it down the line (like 5 to 10 years from now.) Look up the suicide rate of trannys, its like 15x the normal levels. You see, trannys think cutting off their balls or breasts will somehow make them feel better and it probably will for a few years. But after that, the same feelings will come up, what else can you do then? You'll come to the slow realization that you mutilated yourself and there's nothing to show for it.

I wish I was a little taller, smarter, more charismatic etc, but I'll never be able to change these things. But, you know what? That's perfectly okay, learn to accept yourself as you born, learn to love yourself. Someone born as woman. Superficial treatments will not cure anything, what if you cut your breasts off and still feel bad? There's no going back on certain things.

>>7410160
Thank you for talking through this with me, I think it's helped a lot. I've got more confidence that about possibly being trans. I think I'm going to see if there's any good therapists in the area I can go talk to.

>>7410186
I actually kind of agree here. People's brains don't always register the sex change. The brain sometimes will see the body as something it's not or it won't see any change happen when something does, this is seen in things like anorexia and other body disorders. Many cases of anorexics don't actually see their bodies as skinny, in many cases with trans people they will end up not actually being able to process the changes made to their bodies.

>>7410184
Good on ya! And if you do want surgery go to thailand, bitches know what's up. The west is just not as good with body tinkering.

>>7410208
Or korea. My korean friend says that chinese literally come in busloads just for surgery. She got her eyes done and they look great.

>>7409681
>taking a selfie during class

>>7410154
I just started a new cringe thread.
No fucks given.
>>>7410273

>At a first week uni lecture for this year around half an hour before it even begins
>Topic of what we've been doing over the holidays comes up in our little line of friends
>One of my friends turns out to be the volunteer coordinator for a convention I recently applied to volunteer for
>The girl next to him reads tons of good manga
>Mfw going out to lunch with the coordinator after the lecture and meeting even more volunteers who have applied, or are in the process of
>Mfw they're not even weaboos

Today was such a good day. I can't stop smiling.

I'm terrified that I fucked up.

>Meet my ideal guy
>Trying to be open with him about everything so that if there's something about me he can't stand, it's out of the way before we get too serious
>He came into the relationship with the same mindset due to his past
>Finally get serious enough to let him know about my dad's physical and sexual abuse
>Never told anyone the details I gave him
>He tries to comfort me about it at first
>Hasn't talked to me since

I'm terrified he sees me as damaged goods now.

Deciding between living with boyfriend (Closer to work, more money since we'd be sharing rent AKA more burando, a lot quieter but he's not very ambitious and sometimes I feel like I have to mom him) or living with my mom (Bitchy, blasts shitty music 24/7, can't afford to feed me, smokes, is always pressuring me but when I'm gone for a few days she gets all clingy like "Oh I missed you and I cried when you were gone" and stuff)
Plus she hates my bf even though I've lived with him before.
I know it's not a really serious problem, but it still stresses me out.

>>7411669
It sounds a lot more stressful to live with your mom than your boyfriend. Mothering him > worrying about food and being pressured.

Good luck in whatever you choose, anon.

>>7411643
This feel. I occasionally feel this way since I have terrible self esteem and don't want my boyfriend to get smacked with my issues... But we're still together for quite a long time, so I got that going for me.

>comfort him too
>remember that this isn't an everyday occurrence to him
>say that it isn't a big deal
>while also saying that it is a big deal
>point is you have to let him know that you're not affected or defined by it now
>ask for his support, but don't let him be your crutch

You have to take charge, anon, and do some damage control.

>>7411669
Sounds like living with the bf would be a lot less stressful. You can always invite him out more, try to get him to be more active, etc. Give him a lifestyle change and maybe he will change?

I posted in a previous thread, and I got one response, which I think actually put it well: I feel like my mind sometimes goes to "Fight or Flight" situations even when I'm just trying to relax or enjoy or have fun. I usually end up enjoying and having fun, but not without the constant thoughts of, "But what about this? Remember these regrets? Oh, but what about these unfulfilled things?". Where I basically cannot stop thinking sometimes, and it has affected my sleeping, where I've gone a few nights without a wink of sleep because of this. The anon suggested I seek professional help since professionals would probably be able to help me out with this more, and I appreciated the advice.

All I want to know right now is... does anyone else feel the way I do? Where your mind constantly bothers your conscious thoughts with irrelevant and often intrusive thoughts?

>>7411675
God damn, was it really that big of a mistake to tell him? Right after he tried comforting me, I told him I know he's nothing like my dad and that I feel comfortable with him. I changed the subject to something else that we're more comfortable with. After a couple hours, we told each other we love one another and went our way.
It's just right after that he hasn't said a single word to me since and it's been a couple days. I'm going to take your advice and take charge. Thank you, anon.

>>7411643
Oh God I know that feel
>Asked out guy I really liked. He rejects me by saying he's a bit "fucked up" (Not as in emotionally unestable or unhealthy, he just has weird fetishes)
>Think I still have a chance thanks to this
>One day, my friends just say in front of him how I am very fucked up, egotistical, self destructive, toxic, irresponsible and damaged goods.
>AHAHAH NO CHANCES BY NOW

>>7411684
I've been trying for a bit. I mean, he has changed. And he does listen and that's why I love him, I just wish he'd clue in a bit more when I say "Hey, let's do this thing! Oh, you're tired? OK" and "Instead of playing league all day, maybe you could wash the dishes once in a
while". He's getting better though.
>>7411672
The thing I'm more stressed about is telling my mom. She gets really angry.

Thanks guys! <3

>>7411643
If he isn't talking to you because of that, he's an asshole who isn't worth it.

>>7411689

Are you me, anon?

I know it's one of the trendy things nowadays to claim but that's generalized anxiety disorder to a T. I did a lot of reading about cognitive-behavioral therapies to help me get through the day.... Still trying to work up to calling a therapist.... Can't talk myself out of stupid hypothetical where the therapists laughs at me / thinks I'm a loser.... Great Catch-52 here.

Recently searched google images for a reaction picture using the term "landwhale laugh".

Scrolled down, oh look who it is?

>>7411725
Not entirely true. Some people have trouble dealing with that kind of stuff if they've been sheltered all their life or aren't used to those issues, and are afraid of handling it wrongly. He may be just scared to hurt you or preparing to deal with it. Not knowing how to instantly deal with this type of thing doesn't make you an horrible person.

If he, however, takes TOO long to talk to you again you should probably give up because yeah, he's an asshole. Being shocked temporarily by that kind of revelation is one thing, deciding to cut off a person from their life for it is another.

>>7411691
It was not. If someone can't deal with your emotional baggage then they're not worth it anon-chan. Imagine having to keep that from him for the rest of your life. Imagine dating him for years and finally telling him only to find out he can't handle it.

A very long story made very short... I have a very young friend who is suicidal, and I've ended up EMS on him twice. The second time he ended up in a long-care facility for over a year. I thought he'd improved, but he's spiraled down several times since.

He flew across the country to Katsucon to see me, and I tried to give as much encouragement as I could when he suddenly dumped suicidal feelings on me at 4AM (literally when I was dragging myself to my room to crash...) , and I thought it helped- but less than a month later and he sends me a cutesy suicide message on Googles on Tumblr.

I am exhausted. I have tried every way to encourage and help him, but this is beyond me. I have expressed to him many times that I don't know his situation well enough to offer advice, and I am not professionally equipped to help him. I'm 25, he's 17, and I've very clearly marked my boundaries, but he idolizes me as "senpai."

When he's well, he's witty and charming and so funny. But when he goes on these jaunts he makes no sense at all, and is ridiculously dramatic. At this stage, his suicide attempts seem to be more cries for attention, and I am beyond tired, and worn, and begging him to seek help because all of my walls of text and even speaking to him seems to sail right over him, and then he's fine and relaxed the next day.

I'd call bullshit or fakeout- but the second time EMS came in, when they gave me the followup phonecall, they said he had been on the floor unconscious when they broke the door down.

I feel emotionally manipulated, taken advantage of, and frustrated. But who can say that to someone who wants to kill themselves? I can't bear the thought of him finally succeeding and having been able to stop it. He still has so much potential, but I just can't fight his fight for him anymore.

>>7412697
CALLING EMS, god, I read this over so many times, how did I miss that.

>>7412697
Let the faggot die.

>>7412697

You are in no way responsible for anything that happens to him. If anything, you should probably start distancing yourself from too many "young" friends. It deters possible boyfriend/husbando material away from you.

>>7412725
Been trying to for a while. I wrote him a big letter recently essentially telling him he needs friends his own age who can commiserate better with him. He seemed to take it well and understand, but then this. I mainly hang with people my age or older. But for whatever reason this kid has just glommed on hardcore.

Thankfully he lives on the other side of the country.

>>7412697
Is this person in a state that has Baker Acts?

Where the fk are his parental units for support?

And you feeding him attention is only making things worse. Cut away from him. You are not a licensed therapist, you are only making his attention addictions worse. He needs actual help and you are not the one who can provide that.

Lolita feel:
>Out shopping
>Spy light purple lace-style pantyhose
>Oh, this will lool great with that skirt I bought with purple on it!
>Come home
>My skirt has pink-purple.
>The tights are blue-purple.
Stupid, stupid, stupid. I must have been standing under rosy lights or something.
I'll probably try coording them anyway, but I wouldn't post it anywhere. I'm embarassed, but I don't know if I'm being too picky.

>>7412883
Pretty much me and every color mint/green possible. 3 of my AP items mints are differnt and ive been trying forever to get the right colored stockings to match

I feel like I'm slipping into compulsive shopping again. I spent many hours today looking for more stuff to buy, I've spent so much money this month. I've paid my bills but I want to keep some money in savings and I don't want my boyfriend to worry about me again.

>>7412883
only one way to know. POST PICS

>>7412959
As soon as you catch yourself browsing, stop immediately and go outside for a walk or do something else. Hope you won't let yourself down!

>>7412959
I would try downloading the "self control" app. Obviously you can't block everything, but you can either block all of the sites that are problematic for you, or a create a "white list" of sites that you are allowed to visit. It's been very useful for me.

When I was young, I was a bit weeb. I took some pretty raunchy pictures when I was like, 14, of me in school uniforms and shit. It was stupid, I know, but I was pretty stupid at that age. Anyhow, this thirty something year old married man then starts messaging me, and we start talking. He slowly starts to get on my nerves and creep me out a little. He lived in my area, and he keeps asking me to a "photo shoot" with him. I went to his DA page, and all his pictures were really sexual. I turned him down, but he wouldn't stop pestering me about it. He then starts sending me these page long messages about how amazing I am, and he would get all touchy if I didn't respond right away. He would also get online as soon as I went on, no matter what time, and he would open the chat thing and send me a bunch of messages. He was really annoying, and I wanted him to just fuck off and leave me alone, but I knew he had those sexy pictures of me, and I was worried he would send them to the people on my friends list if I was rude. I told him that I was banned from the internet and deleted my account. Now, six years latter, I thought I should try making a new facebook. Right away, he's the first person to friend request me, and he sent me a long ass message about how he missed me. What the fuck. He also found my OkCupid profile and my DA, which I don't know how he did, because I used a different email, name and everything. I don't understand how he could have possible found me after all this time and with all the different information, and I don't know how he did it so fast. Oh, and he also has a baby now. And he's still with his wife. I'm scared for that baby, her dad's a fucking creep. I'm ignoring him for now. His facebook is also filled with a bunch of immature friend drama, so that's funny.

>>7412959
Along with what >>7413051 said, Leechblock for when you're online is good. Blacklist the bad sites so even when you find yourself just casually opening another tab without even really thinking about it, it won't allow you to even see the Homepage.

>>7413172
what the fuck

>>7413172
So, he has a bunch of what basically amounts to child porn of you saved and you think he has the upper hand on you? You're a fucking moron and you deserve what is happening for your stupidity.

>tfw selling my first lolita dress
It's a bit more sentimental because I got it during a Christmas trip with my family. I'm sad that I have to sell it, but I also never wear it.

>>7413248
She was fucking fourteen, anon, she clearly doesn't think that anymore. Regardless, that is terrifying.

>>7413172
>He then starts sending me these page long messages about how amazing I am, and he would get all touchy if I didn't respond right away. He would also get online as soon as I went on, no matter what time, and he would open the chat thing and send me a bunch of messages. He was really annoying, and I wanted him to just fuck off and leave me alone
I'm glad I'm not the only person who deals with this bullshit.
>I've even spelled it out for these thick skulled idiots that they annoy me and they still won't fuck off
They're mentally imbalanced. Fuck if I ever felt I was making someone uncomfortable I'd be too embarrassed to show my face.

>tfw I wanna convince my SO to let me take the virginity of this weeb I know

>>7413172
And here is an example of shit parenting versus a parent who raises their kid not to touch nudes of themselves and send to strange old men online. Wow. You're amazing, anon

>>7413341
Take nude photos. Lol phone ^

>>7413172
What a fucktard you were....

Captcha : roducum plebeian

>>7413172
You should message his wife. This guy sounds like a predator and a stalker among other things. You could also threaten him, but that likely wouldn't fix things.

>>7413359
>>7413341
>look at what morally superior snowflakes we are~*~
I don't give a fuck if someone takes nude pictures of themselves, nudity doesn't merit fucking harassment you psychopath-enabling uncle fuckers.

>>7413172
you understand you can go to prison right?

You understand you will be labeled as a sexual predator right?
even if it was you who took them as yourself
the law still says you took and even distributed child porn

>>7413405
This. Doing something dumb doesn't mean you deserve to have your entire life ruined forever jfc.

>>7413366
this is a bad idea, because he could easily strike back by exposing you.

Yes he could go to prison, but so would you.
you are the one who took them and distributed the child pornography

>>7413413
>>7413421
Does it count as child porn distribution at all if she distributed them when she was 14? This doesn't sound right, we'd have dumb kids on tumblr getting arrested all the time if it were.

>>7413420
the law isnt this black and white
the law is the law

ex:distribute/create child porn=jail time
no ands ifs or butts

whether your old as shit and took them of a kidnapped under age girl or took them yourself in front of the mirror back when you were 14...you will get prison time and then after be labled as a sex offender

Im not saying its fair, im just pointing out this is how it works

>>7413431
are you really this ignorant?

wow /cgl/ sure is underage now a days...or is it spring break already in high school?

>>7413437
Or maybe i'm not american fuckcunt

>>7413431
it matters how the court determines the photo

it has to be obviously sexual
ive seen kids/adults get jail time for distributing kids with just bathing suits, but the poses with REALLY sexual/pornographic
the law is confusing but they cant keep changing it so they try to stay at pace by throwing anyone in jail who does it.

as for tumblr, I think you just have to wait for someone to hate/be annoyed by you enough to call the police on you

>>7413172
>>7413413
>>7413420
>pretty raunchy pictures
Guys this doesn't have to mean nudes, it could even just be sucking on a lollipop and looking seductively at the camera.
I haven't seen stalked-anon confirm either way. We should be asking this before saying she'll go to jail.

On topic:
>Going to Sakuracon
>It's on 4/20
There are going to be so many annoying stoners screaming about this. Especially since it's (sort of) legal now. I don't get the appeal of hollering in public, but there are always people who do this at conventions.

>>7413444
God damn it, I didn't realize the dates. I have about zero tolerance for annoying stoners, let alone if they're screaming... Blech.

>post outfit in Lolita thread in forum
>suddelny, newbies come in spamming with "Oh, I would never buy one of those $300 brand dresses!!" "OMG is it safe to order from qutieland??", "I cannot wait for my bodyline luckypack!!"
>Why
>Get no attention, feel like an attention whore for wanting attention

>>7413501
Gurrrrrrrl, just sit back and laugh. It sounds like you triggered that avalanche, from what you say, so obviously they're paying attention to you. They don't want to acknowledge you, because that would be giving in to your superiority.

>>7410079

(idk if you're even still here but hey I already put the effort in and typed this out. Maybe someone else will find it useful)

Don't worry m8 I get you. I love dressing up and all that feminine guff and I'm on the NHS getting therapists and shit for my GID and I'm expecting to go on 'mones this year, maybe even in a few months. It's completely possible to be feminine and a transman, same as it's possible to be a butch transwoman. Dysphoria doesn't always mean "oh my god i fucking despise myself" and wanting to hack at your skin with a dull meat cleaver, often for me it's just a weird disconnect, or like someone humming in my ear. It's always there, but sometimes I can ignore it a great deal, and others I'm hyperaware of it and I just want it to go away. When it comes to being feminine, it's the same. some days I can't deal with it because it's reminding me that there's something wrong, others I'm sat there thinking "I am a bloke that likes eyeliner and leopard print shoes and that's okay." It IS 100% based around my body though.

I'll dump you some links that might help:

helpfultransinfo.tumblr.com/post/74678476639
helpfultransinfo.tumblr.com/post/63547190474
helpfultransinfo.tumblr.com/post/58401803728

(tbh this whole blog and especially this tag [http://helpfultransinfo.tumblr.com/tagged/s] are really useful. It's fun by the evil truscum so you know it's good info)

tm-tan.tumblr.com/post/78638235543/
theotheropinion.tumblr.com/post/30927573864/
theotheropinion.tumblr.com/post/30974789782/
theotheropinion.tumblr.com/post/35241845063/
theotheropinion.tumblr.com/post/31912885902/

Related:

>anon why do you like that pink shirt you're supposed to be turning into a boy
>anon why have you got BEH BEH cream foundation you're supposed to be turning into a boy
>anon why are you looking at dresses you're supposed to be turning into a boy

bonus:

>anon you never talk to us anymore why is that

>>7409849
See if you can find local/online LGBT or trans specific groups, they're usually free and chatting with like minded people can help.

>>7410079
Anon, i have a really similar story to you. I hated my body for the longest time and was on the verge of transitioning. I was really conflicted because I was in a male dominated field and felt like I would be betraying all the people who congratulated me for that by transitioning. I ended up deciding to try to be more comfortable with being a girl, and I'm so glad I did. I'm really happy now, and have way more money set aside for my hobbies and therapy because I didn't spend it all on transitioning. My advice is not to rush into anything you might regret.

I'm the person at >>7413172

I'm not going to try getting him arrested, he might not even still have the pictures of me, and I don't want to stir shit up. The guy seems like he could potentially be malicious, so I'm just going to ignore him. I don't want to cross him, in case he really is as crazy as he seems. I don't know a lot about his wife, but his facebook is filled with a bunch of fights with people and he generally makes an ass out of himself a lot. She's probably an idiot herself if she hasn't realized this by now, so I'm just going to stand back. Also, the pictures were nudes. I am very aware of how stupid this was, but they've already been taken and there's nothing that can be done about it.

I wish we could effectively make a white com without niggers and jews bitching about it.

>>7413871
You just need one transwhitey, and you're set. There's a whole nation of them in south america.

>>7413845
Its okay anon. Its child porn, it wont see the light of day. If anything, itll stay underground between pedophile p2p. No worries.

>>7413845
Hey, you know what? You're taking all this shit and not taking bleach. Remember, we'll be shtting all over your facebook memorial page. So good on you.

>>7413753
>>7413767
>>7413796
Thank you for even more replies. The links are really handy to look through, and they're helping to clear up some misinformation. I'm happy to see I'm not the only person who still loves pretty things, even if they are trans.

I'm definitely not going to rush into anything though, I'm going to find a good therapist that can help me sort through everything. I really don't want to fuck myself up any worse, since that's the opposite direction I'm trying to go with all of this.

>>7412819
>parental units
Do...I know you? Sorry if this is weird, but I have a friend who says the same thing, and I very rarely hear it anywhere else..

>>7413951
Not likely, I would have given you a stern talking-to already if we did. If you can't get in contact with their family, then leave them be and let them feed off someone else or finally end up in therapy.

>>7413951
It's not an uncommon expression. Tweens use it.

>>7414013
Fucking where? San Francisco? Portland? Sweden?

>>7414019
Not the anon you were talking to, but I used to say it when I was a tween/young teenager; I used to live down in St. Louis.

>>7413951

My friend says this, and he's a (slightly intentionally) awkward dude so I always thought it fit.

For some reason I always assumed he got it from somewhere else though. I guess this just reinforces the idea.

>>7411709
wow with 'friends like those anon you don't need enemies...

>>7412697
honestly I'm sure it hurts to hear this but you should cut him out of your life. I used to have a friend like this who was my neighbor and went to my high school and I was finally able to cut her out of my life after going out of state for college and it was definitely for the better.

>Be me
>Wear classic and toned down sweet to conventions and meetups, however wear jeans and hoodies to uni, sometimes post photos of co-ords on Facebook
>Most people don't care, one girl on my uni course though
>"Anon you should wear your lolita/circle lenses/wigs to lectures that would be so cool and quirky!!
>I point out that I don't want to distract others or attract unnecessary attention when I'm trying to learn, our classrooms are usually very warm and I don't want to overheat and I wouldn't be comfortable wearing lolita through three hour lectures.
>You don't have to be ashamed of your hobbies anon!

Seriously how do I deal with this girl, she won't drop the damn subject and she seems obsessed with my clothes?

>>7414191
Just ignore her? It's super annoying to try to deal with people that won't leave a subject alone, especially when you list your reasons for not doing something. I hope she backs off eventually.

Well, I have a tiny victory, but I can't really share it with people I know.
I got on new antidepressants after years of nothing really working. I've been on it for a while now.
I realized that death isn't as big of a pull than before. It used to be a knot in my chest, a longing, a desperation that would trap me in bed at its worst. I used to heavily resent the people who would mourn for me, since my death would be cruel to them. I wished that they weren't there, so I wouldn't have anything tying me down.
But I've realized that I don't feel quite so resentful of these people. I even feel grateful for some of them.
The pull has dulled from "I have no personal reason to live, I don't deserve to live" down to "I guess death would be nice. I'm going to do some of these other things in the meantime"

I'm wearing my lolita more often, I'm wearing makeup more often, I'm showering at least weekly, I've been keeping up with my laundry. Though my meds reduce my appetite, which I've unfortunately been taking advantage of.
Of course I've still got a ways to go. I should be showering daily, eat three square meals, and not want to die at all.
I still feel just as lonely, but at least now it doesn't make me sick when I think about it.
I've made recognizable improvement. It makes me kind of proud, even though no one else knows how bad it got.

>>7414259
Stay strong anon-chan

>>7414276
Thanks, anon. It feels better to share it with someone.

>>7413911
It doesn't matter, blacks people would still bitch.

>>7412959
Wishlist/watchlist/bookmark everything. I find that clicking that button gives me that immediate satisfaction, then I say to myself "I'll buy that later" and then I never do unless I really need it. Or I don't want it anymore.

>>7411643
Update: he dumped me this morning. Man.

>>7414524

Jesus christ, I feel bad for you anon. You'll definitely meet someone who will understand you and that you don't have to hide anything from, I promise.

Internet hugs. I know it sucks now, but just know it's not your fault at all.

>>7414524
I'm so sorry, anon... But it turns out he wasn't worth it, though, so it's better to not be together now than to be miserable with him later. Here's a gif to cheer you up!

>>7414524
Nobody wants to hear about how your daddy made you cum for the first time. Keep those things to yourself next time.

>>7414524
Oh man I'm sorry anon

>>7414530
>>7414545
>>7414570
Thank you, anons. Sorry for the dramatic whining, but it just sucks that I finally grew close enough to someone to tell them my darkest secret and he dumps me over it. He was the type of guy I dreamed of. I just really wish I kept it from him. Some things are better left unsaid. I'm pissed at myself and him.

>>7414577
No, anon. Don't be pissed at yourself, if the abuse is still something that affects you and hurts you (which it clearly is), then your partner not only has every right to know about it, but you also deserve to have a partner who is understanding and who will be there to help you heal. You eventually want to be able to move past it, don't you? Because if you have to bottle up something like this for the sake of the relationship, then the relationship isn't very strong and there's a really good chance it would crumble under something else equally stressful (and you can't expect to be able to build a life around a weak relationship like that). You'll never have closure if you have to endure it alone, anon. Trust me.
Take care of yourself and don't beat yourself up about this, at least you found out he couldn't be there for you before you had two kids and a mortgage.

>>7414524
>>7414577
It's better than you find he's a disgusting piece of shit earlier than late, anon. You dodged that bullet.

>tfw I have a lot of cosplays to sew for 3 upcoming events
>tfw everything I touch goes great even if it's the first time doing it
>tfw people get stuck at sewing the easiest things

>£30 bodyline order
>£80 customs fee

what in flying fuck.

>>7414972
Holy crap. Are you from Germany by any chance?

I've been with my boyfriend for about a year and we haven't had sex in 4 or 5 months. I really really want to have sex but he's put on a lot of weight lately and has been super clingy and moody. I don't feel attracted to him anymore and I don't know if it's a passing thing or not. Even when we did have sex, it was really bad. He has a tiny penis but that wouldn't be so bad if he knew how to use it/how to do anything when we have sex. I prefer to just masturbate than to have sex with him but I'm really unhappy about it. He knows but things haven't gotten any better.

>>7414999
>he knows
Have you just said, "You're fat and bad at sex also you have a tiny dick" or did you say, "We should try out this position" "I like it when you do this when you finger me" "I've always wanted to try this kinky thing" "Let's try mutual masturbation" "It's really hot when you do this"
"I'm starting this workout regimine and I'd love it if you joined me on my runs!" "I'm doing this thing with food, it's really great. You should try it." "I think you'd enjoy playing this sport. There's a club through parks and rec"

Do you like him in other aspects? What is it specifically that you like about him? If you can identify that, it'll give you motivation to put the effort in jumpstarting your sexlife and save your relationship.
If you have a hard time thinking of anything, maybe you need to rethink this.

>>7414999
>he's been super moody and clingy
maybe cause you haven't had sex for half your relationship and he can tell you're thinking about leaving him

>>7414993
Nope, UK. On second inspection it looks like it's for a package from IW, but still, eugh.

>>7415018
I was never that blunt and we tried lots of positions and things but just never felt good. It's not only small but thin and it kept falling out. I just felt so upset that I don't really want to try anymore. When he would finger me he would hurt me and he'd say gross things trying to be sexy and it was just a huge turnoff. He can't even spank me properly so I don't have much hope to be honest.

He's been eating better now and lost a bit of weight but he doesn't take much pride in his appearance anyway. Today we went out and he wore bright red trackpants with yellow stripes, a dark green hoody, bright green and white sneakers and a long sleeve t-shirt with some weird print and holes all over it. He doesn't get that it's embarrassing.

I do really like him, but the spark is no longer there. I don't know if it's because we live together now and we see each other too much or what. But I definitely have never felt as strongly about him as I did about my previous boyfriend. The things that I like about him though are qualities that you can like in a friend though so I'm not sure how to relate that to sex.

>>7415027
I've tried to break up with him before and I just couldn't go through with it as he broke down and I do really love him, I'm just not sure what way it is in. He's always had a bit of a temper though and can be a bit of a man-child. I'm just so bad at confrontation and I don't like hurting people's feelings. It would probably be better if he dumped me but I don't know if I even want that. We have a lease together too so it's a bit complicated.

>>7415033
And while I do love him, he definitely loves me a lot more than I love him. I feel selfish but he seems to prefer being with me in a okay relationship to breaking up ever.

>>7415033
Hoooo, he sounds exactly like the first two guys I dated. If you can't make him see that it's worth putting some effort in (sex-wise or just in general) then you'll slowly end up resenting him for it and that shit's not healthy.

Also, if it's not too embarrassing for him, you can actually get hollow strap-ons for dudes. Might be worth looking into! With the other stuff it can help if you literally take his hand and show him exactly what to do. I've had plenty of shitty sex and it only gets better once you throw in all the communication you possibly can.

>>7415041
Sometimes he wants to try and other days he gets angry and thinks I'm shallow. But my dream is for him to just wear normal t-shirts and jeans which isn't that much to ask for.

I'd probably want to cry if we had to resort to that. The worst thing is probably that I've had really good sex before. And I didn't appreciate it until now.

He's also just a really nice guy and would do pretty much anything for me. I don't know why he likes me so much as I'm in such a bad mood so often these days.

>>7415041
Also, how did the relationships with your exes end? Did you choose to break up with them and were these things a part of it? Thanks for your advice.

Incoherent feels oncoming:

> moving out of newbie lolita stage
> coordination skills improved a shit tonne
> hair skills + makeup skills slightly improved
> face is pretty ugly

> see pictures of me from con
> coord looks great, hair is alright, makeup alrightish, face is fugly
> also, shitty pose + facial expression (I look angry because of my hand placement and because of my face)

I have so many mixed emotions about it all. On one level I'm really proud of how far I've come with my coordination skills and sense of style but I still get a little overwhelmed by my weaknesses.
Poses, hair and makeup can all be fixed to a certain degree but I know that there's not a huge amount I can do about my face unless I really nail makeup and angles, and even then I'm not guaranteed success.

I just want to be the best I can be, it's actually the main thing driving me atm but all these little things are adding up and pulling me back.

>>7415033
I've been in the same situation, in a relationship with a fat fuck with a small dick.

Not knowing what to do in bed isn't that bad, people can be trained, but there's no solution for the size problem. My currect boyfriend was a virgin but he payed a lot of attention to what I told him about sex. Also he has a big dick which I love.

>tfw finally taking a nice dick after dealing with that gross baby dick for ages

>>7415047
Honestly, not too fantastically. I hadn't gotten to the point where I could just talk about the stuff that was bothering me and it just got worse and worse and ended up being too much, which is why I'd say it's best to be as honest as possible while it still could be manageable. Just try to be gentle with it and that's really all you can do.

>>7415051
Are you me? Sometimes I wish I could pull off guro just to have an excuse to wear a mask and not have my face on show.

>>7415051
What is it specifically about your face you don't like? I'm pretty average looking but I get a major case of bitch face in photos

>>7415033
Honestly, do you not see where things are going while you're writing this out? You need to talk about it - PROPERLY talk about it, rather than beating around the bush. It's obviously something that you have huge issues with and are both ignoring. If you can't talk to him about what's bugging you, and also work out a way to sort things out together, then at some point your relationship is either gonna blow up big time and/or destroy both of you. And if you can't work it out, you need to break it off because it's not fair to either of you. I don't care how fucking "nice" he is or how much it would hurt his feelings, an unhealthy relationship is ultimately worse for both of you than actually sorting your shit out. Easier, but worse for you.

>>7415051
Don't sweat it much, just keep improving. Anyone who criticizes you for 'ugly face' is a twat, the rest you can just keep practicing.
Be proud of your accomplishment!

>>7414060
Kind of an update on this whole mess.
Two nights ago after his cutesy "goodbye senpai, sorry kohai has to go away" etc, I more or less sent him a "kiddo, I care about you, but I have told you before I can't help with this, please get in touch with your doctors, or a professional, they can help you and I don't want to undo any good they're doing because I'm not trained for this."

He sent me a longass email that was a real suicide letter, including instructions on what to do with his ashes(?) But honestly? I'll believe this shit when I see it, which makes me feel like a terrible person to even think. This kid HAS tried before and was caught in the act, has hurt himself before. But it never seemed... Intentionally life-ending. It was more 'just enough to hurt and worry people' acts.

I've been trying to saw him out of my life for a while, but online, he seems to find me anyway. I thought his dependence on me would wean off.

Anyway, since the whole GOODBYE EMAIL (which I didn't respond to), I haven't heard anything from him, or tearfilled parents, so my guess is he's pulling an internet flounce. Or, I hope, he was caught and is going back into care, he really needs it.

He's a funny, good kid, but god, he's got so many issues and needs professional care.

>>7412819
Yes, Baker Act got him last time, he was in a facility for a year and a half or so.

And his parents... I met his mother. She seemed very nice, but I got the feeling they're completely overwhelmed with this kid and don't know what to do. They're rich, and he's clearly spoiled (they flew him all the way from West Coast to Katsucon with VIP passes.) I think they're just being clueless or helpless at this point.

>>7415271
Do you have any advice for this in an outsider looking in perspective?
A friend of mine has been complaining about her little sister,12, faking suicide threats. Apparently her parents are just as harsh with their eye-rolling. I can't imagine the damage this message is making: "You want to kill yourself? Who cares! Finish your goddamn chores."
As you've seen with your case, a person has to be pretty damn messed up to make these sort of threats, whether they're manipulative or actually suicidal. It needs to be addressed further than a "Knock it off."
I know the girl, I've talked to her, and I like her. But I'm not close enough to really talk to her one-on-one with this stuff. We've discussed briefly depression (which I have), and hope, and the times where everything seems pointless. However, her sister, my friend, had always been there too.
From the things she's said, I think she might be a cutter.

I'll admit, the girl kind of wigs me out sometimes. If she turns out to not have emotions or empathy, I wouldn't be dreadfully surprised. But that would definitely need therapy too.

What can I do in this position?

>>7415323
That's tough. She's young, and yeah, language like that is hella damaging. I mean, rushing to take baby to the doctor every time she has a bad day is one thing, but saying "who cares" is bad, too.

It'd make more sense coming from her sister, But maybe she can talk to other adults in her life, teachers or counselors. Usually guidance counselors can try to intervene and get the kid into therapy, depending on how they handle their job. If my experience has taught me anything, it's GET PROFESSIONALS INVOLVED. People who are trained to actually know what to look for, either actual suicidal tendencies or narcissism and depression or whatever it is she needs help with. Who can see past unhappy, angry preteen "I'm gonna kill myself!!" to see what she needs.

Speaking of my case, my kid just sent me a picture in a hospital bed saying, "Yeah, never mind." Of course. I am pretty sure he's letting himself be caught at this point. According to him, he's attempted 19 times, which is not someone actually trying to end it. I told him very frankly, "I'm glad you're safe, take care of yourself and listen to the doctors." 800% done. Pretty sure at this point he's trying to guilt and manipulate me into giving him pity.

>>7415336
How do I get professionals involved beyond calling CPS? What if I'm taking everything too seriously? I'm working off of hearsay. My friend didn't give me much information after I was siding with her sister (I assumed she was asking me how to help her suicidal sister, but she just wanted to complain.)
I suggested getting her in long term care, but my friend never responded to that. Though I did say 'institutionalize', so with the negative connotations with that, I could have phrased it better.
I don't know her history, if she has seen therapists or tried medication. I don't know if the family is being negligent, or if they have gotten her help and are in the same exasperation that you're in.

I'm guessing not, due to what her mother has said about my depression. We asked for some space, since I needed to work through my depression. She said, "But Anon, you're beautiful! What have you got to be depressed about?"
So she doesn't seem to get the connection that depression is a chemical imbalance, nor understand the concept that we can feel emotions that aren't a reaction to an event and that we have little control over that fact.
I wonder if she's the type to go, "Daughter, you're depressed? But look at all the wonderful things we have given you! How ungrateful."
Though she might have interpreted 'working through my depression' as 'working through an event that upset me', but it's still concerning that her knee jerk reaction on self worth is appearance.

>>7415336
Also that sounds like a good way to respond to your situation. You seem to be handling this very well. Hopefully he'll stop looking for you to be his crutch.

>>7415367
Yeesh, that's messy.

Since you're pretty far removed from the situation, calling CPS is sort of overkill and really unwarranted. I'd say that her family not being worried about it is a good indicator she's not serious, but the other things make me think they don't really get mental illness.

As much as it sucks, I'd distance a bit. See things from a bit of further perspective. Maybe kid's going through an unhappy tween phase. Which is entirely possible. I'd hate for this girl to get slapped with a "mentally ill" label and all of that awful stigma and fed pills if she's just dealing with tween angst and it too will pass.

But seriously, fuck people who say "oh, you're depressed? Why, look at all this stuff you have." Chemicals, motherfucker, that's why.

>>7415372
I just wish I'd pulled back sooner.

>>7415336
That definitely sounds like a good way to deal with it. It sounds like he's more borderline-y than truly suicidal, however those sorts of kids often end up accidentally killing themselves. The worst thing to do is to get too involved with them because you end up being chucked up on a pedestal and then when you do something that doesn't conform with their idealised version with you you're suddenly public enemy number one and their reason to no longer keep on living.

>>7415367
It sounds like the parents really, really don't understand what's going on. Even if the threats aren't going to be carried through, there's obviously something seriously wrong with the family dynamics that the sister feels she has to threaten suicide to get attention and the mother seems to have no fucking clue.

>>7415367
A kid who cries suicide doesn't need to be institutionalized. They need a professional, but they don't need to be taken out of home

>>7414259
what meds are you on? I can't seem to find any that work..

>>7415473
Not that same anon but you're going to have to persevere and keep trying different ones, give them 2-4 weeks to work their way into your system and get past the side effects before deciding they aren't working. Everyone's brain chemistry is a little different, and every drug works in a slightly different way. Think of your depression like a puzzle missing a piece. You keep trying different pieces until you find the one that fits.

Also, you could try asking your doctor for Abilify, it's a little pricey but it did wonders for me. I was unable to find antidepressants that did much for me until I started combining them with Abilify, and now I haven't had a problem since. I'm on Welbutrin currently.

>>7415478
I know. I've been tried 3 over the last 5 years (Zoloft, Prozac, Abilify combined with each). the only thing that really helps is weed but that's not something I can do every day.

>>7415271
>>7415336
As someone who's been a suicidal and depressed teenager, I might have some insight. From what I've read this far, however, I know the basics of what he probably feels.

During the times I've really been suicidal, I never told anyone. I stayed quiet about it, cried a lot, and forced myself to stay alive because me killing myself would ruin my sisters life, and I love her more than anything. I had a particularly bad night once and almost jumped off a cliff - but decided against it since it wasn't that high and I didn't know if I'd die or not.

At other times, I was just scared and lonely and tired - and that's when I would tell people I wanted to kill myself, when I'd make "attempts". Usually, this is (consciously or not) a "help me" cry, or a "I don't want to live like this and I don't know what to do".
It's difficult to ask for help when you don't know what would help you. You look around for options, but you can't really find any. I mostly just wanted some magical boy to come into my life and kiss my scars and fix me and all my problems and then live happily ever after.

Usually people who make "attempts" or tell you that they want to die, it doesn't actually mean that. It just means that they don't wanna be miserable but can't see any way out but they don't want to die but it's the only option. It's a really difficult thing to explain, and a lot of backwards and twisted thinking.

He sounds a lot like me when I was younger. Everyone thought I had BPD too, but I calmed down a bit since. Hopefully, he will too.

>>7415484
Totally different anon, but I'd suggest seeing if you can try Wellbutrin. It's a totally different, unique class of antidepressants, so it's often something to try if nothing else works.
But both Prozac and Zoloft are SSRIs, so you might want to try an SNRI as well (Effexor, Cymbalta, etc.) if you haven't yet. SNRIs made me suicidal, but some people do really, really well on them.

>>7415534
He had told me he had schizophrenia among other things, I know he said he had been taking anti-psychotics. (Which he decided to go off of for a while. I kind of tore him a new one for that.)

I should also mention he is transmale, so there's all the things that go with that, as well. Though his family supported his transition and used correct pronouns and so on.

Regardless, whatever he's struggling with is really deep-set, not likely to go away if he's been to the hospital several times, removed from school, etc.

>>7415033
ew sorry, but he sounds fucking gross, why were you going out with such a guy in the first place?

>>7415748
Because she's fucking ugly and can't get a /fit/zen alpha male.

>>7415045
well, it's not gonna help anyone if you just stay with him out of sympathy

>>7415717
I'm not saying it goes away, but he will probably calm down a little once puberty is over. I've been in the hospital more times than I can count, and I expect to return there. But I'm calmer and a bit more rational than I used to be. And it really does help, a lot, to get to that point.

>two weeks ago
>con I used to go to in high school falls right on the first weekend of my college spring break
>friend goes to said college
>plan cosplay group together
>a lot of old friends are coming to the con
>get really excited, makes a lot of stuff for friend who can't sew and even style his wig
>still learning to sew myself
>things seem to be coming together after making his stuff
>can't start on mine till the night before (tonight) due to a lot of midterms/driving back to my hometown
>spend a stupid amount of time trying to figure out what I'm doing
>nearly 2AM and everything I've done tonight looks like shit
>tfw when I have to text him and let him know I won't be coming to the con tomorrow
>tfw I'll probably just sulk sadly around the house tomorrow

I'm so disappointed in myself. It's very frustrating learning to sew/teaching yourself when you want to cosplay/have to set deadlines especially while going to school and working, which I know a lot of you guys can relate to. So displeased - I spent a decent amount of money and time on all this only to come up with nothing. I'm glad I was able to get his things done and make him happy but I wish I could've done the same for mine. I hate having to back out on a plan - it's so embarrassing and depressing.

I know it's always practice practice practice but I feel so defeated that trying again doesn't sound like it's going to happen for me soon. At least tomorrow night I may get drinks with my old friends who will be there but I just want to sleep forever right now.

>>7415033
This was how things were with my ex - I wasn't physically attracted to him, but we had tons in common, and I loved spending time with him.
In the end, we broke up mutually (although I suggested it first) and against all odds, we're still best friends (my fiance thinks he's a really cool guy, so it's all good there too). I realize now he was basically the guy version of myself and not at all what I needed in that kind of relationship.

>>7416284
just go anyway even if you can't cosplay. it beats moping at home all day depressed.
I know it's hard to spend a lot of effort and money and have subpar results but practice and experience are valuable even if it doesn't end up producing anything wearable. Next time you go to cosplay you'll have sewing experience to step up on and know the importance of budgeting your time better. Also next time don't do someone's stuff before yours if it's not a commission. Your time and happiness are valuable too anon.

>>7409681
Simply put don't be shy about it. You look really pretty, I would be the one shy about trying to ask you for your number.

>>7414524

I c-could be your bf for a while? I'm good at emotional support ._.

>have always wanted someone to push me get into cosplay more
>finally get someone who wants to do a duo cosplay
>we start planning to go to comic con and drive there
>mfw he bailed yesterday
>mfw no one to go with anymore

>>7415098
God, that would make things so much easier!

>>7415099
I'm really unphotogenic, I get bitch face plus my eyes are really sunk in and my nose is pretty bad imho.

>>7415106
It's just something that I've always been criticised for so it's hard to forget about it.

Angelic Pretty's Fairy Marine OP. It just came out today, 9am was when Chinese SSs first saw it. 2pm released and instantly sold out, international site sold out too. I got up at 2pm, checked weibo at 3, and cried for the next 3 hours. It's so fucking cute and I was on a goddamned emotional rollercoaster. It's such a simple yet adorable and universal piece, everyone speculated it'd be replica'd when it showed up, and lo and behold it already is. I hate replicas. I hate dress and print replicas. Bags and shoes I can stand, but not dresses (call me a hypocrite whatever). I bought the damn replica of this dress. It's too cute for words. My dream SM coord is in this dress. I really hate myself for buying it, but it's fucking cheap (like 1/10th of the price of the original) and I comfort myself by saying I'll buy it at the eventual rerelease. Then I'll have a nice throwaway cheap dress to wear.

I hate myself so much for buying the replica, but I must must must have it.

>>7416483
The Satsuki colorway. Fuck I need this too, even though I look terrible in whites. My Junketsu coord goes doki doki.

>>7416483
>>7416484
I want to like it as I love sailor themed items and floaty fabrics like organdy and chiffon, but I feel like the two just don't go together (theme and fabric).

>>7416483
The name cracks me up hardcore. It reminds me of DADT.

>>7416484
HOLYSHIT NO I WAS OUT ALL DAY YESTERDAY AND I JUST NOW SAW THIS FOR THE FIRST TIME NO HOW COULD I MISS THIS
Im feels-ing with you OP

>>7416483
what the fuck. how is there a fucking replica already.

>>7416505
Because Chinks.

My shoes for my cosplay don't fit. The calves of the shoe are way too wide. And it makes me sad. Taking out the zipper isn't an option because there's a lot of crap going on with the shoe, and neither is buying new shoes.

I was just going to use velco or something... And hope no one picks on me for the back of my shoes looking derp.

>tfw first cosplay problems and having no idea what you're doing

>>7416517
Hey now, don't get hasty.

It's because of Chicom copyright laws.

>>7416483
FUCK YEAH CHINA!!!!!!

>>7416464
well it doesn't sound like anything that proper make up and contouring wouldn't be able to fix.
i'm sure you don't look as bad as you say.

also... pics please?

>suffer from depression because of family issues
>never had many friends
>never had a relationship
>get into cosplay and end up making a few friends and becoming more social
>met this guy and start dating me
>one day I tell him I never had a bf before him and that I'm a virgin
>later he tells me he's never met a virgin over 21 and that he doesn't want the responsibility and break up me
>still feeling horrible about it

>finally make up with friend
>Go to her house
>See stuff that i know is mine that she intends on keeping
>mfw dont know how to tell her i want it back

>>7416483
Link to the replica? I hate replicas so much but in this case I don't give a fuck. AP needs to produce more items.

>>7416483
What is up with releases like this? I feel like it was never even announced/discussed before the release.

>>7416706
Solid pieces don't get announced. You snooze, you lose.

>>7416715
So I should be checking AP's website 24/7, 365?

>>7416716
You're not? Wow.

>>7416483
>>7416684
> "oh I hate replicas!"
>"yes! me too!"
>misses release of a dress
>boom! Instant replica-chans
>Hypocrites...

>>7416725
to be fair it's not a print replica, it's a design replica. nobody's artwork is being stolen.

>>7416668
"Oh wow! I was wondering where those went! I must have left them here, huh? Haha, aren't they cute, friend? I've been totally missing them."
Pick it up, look at it a bit. If she has any sort of politeness in her, she'll let you walk away with it. If she protests, that's your call.

Sincerely,
-Someone who would often 'borrow' her friends' clothes
I don't even know what's mine anymore.

>>7416658
Anyone who looks down on female virgins is a degenerate.

>>7416684
>>7416483
Seconding replica details

>>7416484
>>7416483
completely agree with >>7416490
these look so cheap

>>7415562
>>7415484
>>7415473
>>7414259

Late to party, but I was that first anon.
Honestly, the greatest thing I did was realize that I had ADD. I always thought that my difficulties focusing and finishing things were due to depression lethargy or just straight character flaws. I hated myself a lot for thinking I was lazy.
I'm on Concerta, and my antidepressant is Welbutrin. The first time I tried Welbutrin, I didn't go through the whole 4-6 week trial. It gave me really high highs and really low lows. It was pretty exhausting. I was only on it for 3 weeks though, so I wonder if it would have evened out if I gave it time.
I came back to it because the high highs were amazing (as opposed to when I was on Prozac, which took out lows and highs), I gave it time, and mixed with the Concerta, I can finally live again.

>>7416779
Agreed, it almost looks like something from PEA. The shortness + poof of this dress really throws me off, too. I'm an AP fangirl, but the shape of this dress feels a tad too "little girl" to me.

I got a new bag, one of those blue school ones, to carry my tablet and odds and ends around in. I want to cover it with K-ON and Touhou pins and some keychains but I feel like I'd look more infantile than I already do. I don't really know the norm. Do grown women ever use keychains and buttons or is this a tacky/preteen thing to do?

I-I just want to have cute things on my bag, but everything I do gives me that imagined audience feeling, like people will judge me as gross weeaboo and not talk to me because I have pins on my bag. My head hurts. Please advise me.

>>7416801
No they don't.

Stop being a creepy womanchild.

Fuck, this is going to sound vain. I'm relatively attractive with a thin hourglass shape. I'm thankful for my good looks, however I feel as though I'm not taken seriously.
When I'm single, it feels like every straight guy I talk to is only interested in getting in my pants. The moment I get into a relationship, all my male "friends" from conventions immediately cut me off and act shitty towards my SO.
I don't want to be seen as a sexual object and so I don't cosplay anything even slightly revealing anymore and in my every day life I wear baggy clothes and no make up. This is so stupid, but I wish I were more average.

>>7416804
Try working on your personality.

If people only care about your looks then that's all you have to offer.

>>7416802
On a board where people dress up like cartoon characters and wear OTT jfashion, I don't think I understand how it would be creepy.

>>7416811
For normal people it would.

But then again you're a woman so you can get away with this sort of thing.

>>7416807
I have. It's not like I've been attractive my whole life. I've been the ugliest duckling throughout middle school and early high school teased constantly, too tall, acne ridden, glasses, braces, and no fashion sense whatsoever and I spent that time studying, doing my best to socialize with my weeby friends, etc. I received no attention from the opposite gender until I started taking care of myself and dressing better and then suddenly attention exploded. It's like people are only interested enough to look at me and be acquaintances and aren't interested in my personality.

>>7416819
I apologize, I sound quite self-centered in that response. I love people and making friends and I certainly don't expect my friendships to be all about me me me. I prefer the opposite because of all the casual attention paid to me. My close friends are very important and I like to make them happy more than anything.

>>7416819
You have been attractive for the times it mattered, pre-teen days don't matter because people aren't focused on that as they are now.

You can't force guys to be your friends just like they can't force you to date them.

Guys will give special attention to girls they wanna date, if they can't date you then they'll treat you like anybody else. You have to learn how to be interested without relying on this special attention.

>>7416830
Learn how to be interesting*

>>7416830
I see. It just seems as though when they realize I'm taken/not interested romantically they treat me like not worthy of their time as a friend, not just as everyone else. I certainly can't force anyone into being friends but this feels like it happens so often.

>>7416778
yes pls

>>7416837
I understand, what about focusing on your female friends?

>>7416830
Stop being such a raging boner, anon. You sound like a butthurt neckbeard. She's clearly not the problem, it's the company she's keeping. I have a similar problem and once I began weeding out guys who clearly only want to bone I have a lot of good friends, girls and guys. Saying that she clearly just has a shit personality has nothing to do with what guys are wanting from her, you even saidi yourself that she can't make people feel a certain way about her. You just seem bitter.

>>7414999
>for about a year and we haven't had sex in 4 or 5 months.
Yo. That's not healthy. The short time you were together doesn't make it worth it. Break up and move on.

>>7416830
I should specify that this is appears to be a convention only problem. I've been able to make a few casual friendships with males at school where I don't dress up or wear makeup.

>>7416490
mte.

>>7416843
I'm just trying to help. Thinking she'd be better off ugly is crazy.

>>7416807
>>7416830
Worst advice ive ever seen. A great personality might just make the problem worse, are you stupid?

>>7416804
You're going through something most people don't understand. Honestly, when guys I don't like hit on me, I say " You're so cute and funny! You remind me of my little brother." Its the easiest and fastest way to reject somebody.

You shouldn't have to change the way you look so others will like you the way you want them to. I don't think you should have a "better" personality, but maybe a "stronger" personality, so that your true colors are hard to avoid. If they still like you with your true colors, then that's fine!

Im very good friends with 5 male friends, as I was a tomboy in high school. 1 of them is gay, and all other 4 confessed to me. I'm dating one now but my relationships with the other guys haven't changed and they're not butthurt that I rejected them, if anything they've friendzoned me too! And it's great! I can really be my ugly and pretty self around them and they treat me like a friend.

>>7416843
>>7416868
No, no, I understand. It's important to examine both sides of the issue, even if the advice regarding my personality is pretty harsh. Perhaps I should leave this social circle and perhaps I do need to work a bit on my personality. If I'm not appealing as a friend to guys, it is problematic either way because I enjoy the type of friendship men have to offer.

>>7416804
I have a friend like you. I know where you're coming from because I constantly see it happening, and I'm guilty of it myself.
It goes for men and women, when they see attractive women there are all these assumptions that are made about them. I thought my friend was going to be self-centered and vapid. She isn't, she's actually kind of a dork. She has a lot of insightful things to say, but not a lot of people really stick around long enough to hear them.
It's sad seeing all the men who come up, hang out with us, and I start thinking, "Hey, this guy seems nice. He seems to really care about my friend platonically." But then he realizes the situation, and high tails out or just starts tons of childish drama. My friend is rather sexual and polyamorus, and she absolutely hates commitment. Sounds like a guy's wet dream, and when my friend warns them of this fact, they usually get really excited.
Problem is, at least the guys around here, don't really get the 'no commitment polyamory" thing. They all turn into giant fucking drama queens once they realize she's messing around with other people too. Hello? Were you even listening, dude? They all think she's their property. They don't really get that polyamory=/=monogamy.

Now that she has this reputation of being easy (even though she chooses her partners very carefully), nobody takes her seriously. They get their first assumptions of her from her T&A, and once they find out her rep, everyone goes cold. Girls look at her as a threat or as a bicuriousity toy, men either turn into wolves or look down on her. Not a lot of people really look at her as a friend and nothing more. It's disappointing, really.
Everyone thinks a pretty woman can get everything she wants. While she might be able to use it to get a free drink or a rich husband, looks won't help her solve her loneliness.

Anon, I hope that you can find a nice circle of friends who treat you with the respect that you deserve.

I was proposed to by my boyfriend today, and I said yes. But I'm really scared that it won't work out, it brings me to tears.

Here's the story: my parents split after 15 years of being married because my dad cheated. This is the first serious relationship I've ever had and I really REALLY want it to work out. Like, together forever kind of thing, that's the only thing I ever wanted in life.

Some things that are making it harder:
1) I have anxiety and have had since my parents divorced. I'm terrified of being left alone and dying alone. I'm scared of divorce now because I read that it's more likely for people with divorced parents to divorce themselves. My fiance's parents are happily married, however, even though his dad's parents had a rough divorce and they've been married for a long time which makes me feel a little better about it all.
2) We're young and so far everyone has been prognosing divorce to us. Everywhere I go I hear sneers and "yeah that's TOTALLY gonna work out" because we're 24.
3)I'm scared of falling out of love or making a mistake. I'm also scared of being cheated on (even though I am certain that he would never in his life do it, he already proved it a million times when we went through some tough situations), and cheating myself (even though I would never do it either, nor have I before. I'm terrified of it, it's disgusting and I know I'd feel terrible). Basically, I'm scared of either ending up like my mom or my dad.

All I want is to be happy with him and die after living a happy life with the man of my dreams. I don't care if I live for only another year if it means being with him forever. But all I keep hearing is stories of divorce, people being pessimistic and saying "yeah everyone divorces eventually", stories about how rare it is to be happy together, prognoses of my own marriage ending like that etc.

I'm sorry that this isn't too cosplay related or anything, just needed to vent. I'm scared.

>>7416935
lol what, 24 is like the perfect age TO get married. You're most likely out of/done with schooling and have gotten your first real well paying job.

>>7416939
Sure, but I still don't want to divorce.

>>7416935
Never forget: There are lies, damn lies, and statistics.
Statistics are NOT fate, they do NOT rule you, and there are ALWAYS factors that people don't consider with them.
Shark attacks are more common when someone has eaten icecream in the weeks prior. Does that mean that icecream attracts shark attacks? NO! Icecream is most commonly eaten in the summer, which is the season which is most common for people to be near beaches and water

Think of divorce and children of it. People divorce because they are unhappy with their relationship. Kids often get caught up in this because people think they have to stay together 'for the children'. When you get angry people bottled up together, bad things happen. Like abuse.
Now think of children of abuse. Some abused children are so broken down that they don't believe they deserve a good partner. So they turn towards people who mirror what they've seen a marriage to be like. They turn towards abusers, and now they're in an abusive relationship. What eventually happens in an abusive, unhappy relationship? Divorce

Do NOT think that statistics always apply to you. There are way too many factors to calculate in.
You sound happy with your fiancee. He sounds loyal to you

The pessimists around you sound like they've given up on life. They don't believe that people can actually be happy. They're probably this way because they've settled. They don't believe they can be happy, so they never try for things that could make them happy. They stay in relationships they're unhappy with because they don't believe they can get better. And what have we learned about unhappy relationships?

You sound excited and nervous. You sound like you care about this man, and the mere thought of hurting him makes your heart ache. You sound like all these pessimists are getting to you and making you doubt yourself

It is terribly, disgustingly inappropriate what these people have said to you. It's been a DAY. Can't they stand to see someone happy?

>tfw people assume you're a fucking fat ass because you said you can't fit in something

I don't even care my jimmies are rustled

>>7416797
I was on Concerta for 5 years all throughout those antidepressants I tried. Maybe that's why they weren't effective for me?
Concerta did for me what you say Welbutrin did for you. I hated it. I'll have to go back and start it again because I'm going back to school but I think I'll look into that combination w my psych.

Isn't ADD a bitch, though? My mom knew I had it since I was 4 but luckily didn't medicate until about 10 years later.

>>7416801
Do what you want. Anime buttons and keychains are better than Lilly Pulitzer scarves and blood drive stickers on a cheap handbag from F21.

>>7416972
THIIISSS.
According to statistics, Caracas, Venezuela is an expensive city, more expensive than London or NYC. I'm not even kidding, here's a link:
https://blog.internations.org/index.php/2014/03/06/false-economy-the-eiu-cost-of-living-index-2014/
Within the same link, it's explained why the statistics show it even though in reality Tokyo would be way above Caracas, for example.
Same happens with marriage.
Even with the shitty statistics, the amount of marriages that work is quite a bit over half, so everyone most certainly does NOT divorce as easily as people say.
Now count in all the marriages made out of convenience, shotgun weddings (marriages that happen only and solely for the fact that the bride got knocked up), Russian mail order brides, serial divorcees and gold diggers (the upper class women who stay upper class thanks to divorce settlements, even though they were born in a trailer park in Chattanooga). People who divorce due to the husband or wife being abusive, etc etc.
There's also the fact that no one ever manages to mention and interview couples who have been happily married for 50 years because "cheating lying manwhore of a husband" makes for better gossip. There's lots of people, in other words, that have been happy together until their death. It's just that their names are Bob and Mary and they run a small optics shop down the street that nobody cares about. They're not as influential as Donald Trump and his harem of exes, so they rarely get mentioned.

>>7417005
Lilly Pulitzer is ugly as hell. I never got the appeal of the clothes.

>>7416935
My parents were together for 18 years and my dad was with another woman for 16 of those years.
I always figured that if my husband wanted to fuck someone else, I'd ask him to come let me know first. All I hear about married men is that they get tired of the same woman, and tbh, I might get tired of the same man. Imo it's better to have commitment and trust rather than love, because those two things cultivate love.

I'm not telling you to do that, I'm younger than you and in no way ready for marriage, but I wish the best of luck to you!

>>7417001
Maybe try something other than Concerta? My doc started me out on Ritalin before Concerta, which you take 3 times a day. Sometimes it'd make me jittery though, but I could control how much or how little I took. Concerta is easy, though, since it's just once a day.
I've heard good things about Strattera, which I'm pretty sure isn't a stimulant. Welbutrin is actually sometimes prescribed for ADD too (Welbutrin's list seems like a snake oil with how many things it treats: nicotine addiction, depression, ADD, I think it's used for weight loss sometimes too.) so maybe the combination is going above and beyond where you should be at.
Though there's a lot of types of welbutrin: The short acting, sustained release, and extended release. They all feel a little different. And the dosage too.
You might be on too high of a dosage with your Concerta. I'm on a rather low dose with mine. What are you taking? If you hate what you're doing, definitely experiment around a bit. Might even save some money with a cheaper med.

ADD is such a bitch! It's amazing seeing what I've been missing out on. Jesus, all those failed grades that could have been saved... It's also goddamn annoying how it's a controlled substance, makes it a bitch to go through the process to get it into my hands.
It was definitely bizarre when I was on ADD meds and no antidepressants. I still felt dead inside, but I could get up and do things. It was weird. It definitely made me feel better about myself to be accomplishing things.

>>7417015
Not that anon, >>7417008 here, but wouldn't have it just been easier to go be with the other woman if he had an affair for 16 fucking years?
You also gotta realize not everyone can let it go like that and that married men and women aren't arr same so you can't just say that they get tired of the same woman/man as my parents, for example, certainly didn't. Nor did many others. For me, that would be a breach of trust, first and foremost, and betrayal. If you really wanna fuck someone, come tell me, we'll do the paperwork and go our merry ways, then you can fuck them all you like. It's demeaning to me as a woman that a man would treat me like a piece of shit when he gets tired and get a shiny new toy. But that's just me.

>>7417022
>but wouldn't have it just been easier to go be with the other woman if he had an affair for 16 fucking years?
When you have kids at home, it isn't that easy. Cheaters get caught in a position where they don't feel like they can break it off with anyone. I don't personally agree with this line of thinking, so I can't debate it.
It's interesting hearing the true stories from the cheater's side, where they talk about what was/wasn't going through their head. I bet you could find some articles. Pretty sure there's been a bunch of askreddits on the subjec, if you're ok with going there.

>>7417022
Things are more complicated than you think, I have an open relationship with my boyfriend where he can sleep with other women. We agree that he gets some alone time for that and he has to make sure they're clean.

It's a sacrifice I make because he's really great and had countless women before me. I know he won't be satisfied with just me.

>>7417047
That's nice you guys worked out a situation that works for you. You don't sound too happy about it though?
I'm also curious, how often do both of you get tested for stds?

>>7417064
Growing up I realized things can't be perfect. I'm not living a fairy tale.

I'm ok with this situation, that's all. It's something I do for love.

I don't get tested. When we discussed the subject he told me he'd make sure the other women were clear.

>>7417047
I seriously don't understand this. Why do you want to be with somebody who can't dedicate themselves to you? My boyfriend always tells me he doesn't even look at other women and he only faps to my pictures. I never told him to do that or expressed that I wanted it that way. Why do you settle for somebody who doesn't think you're perfect?

>>7417070
>he told me he'd make sure the other women were clear
Yeah, you should see the test results for yourself and make sure he gets tested and you see those results, too.

>>7417070
>I'm ok with this situation, that's all. It's something I do for love.
That's not love. That's hopelessness and desperation.

>>7417077
yep. This.

>>7417070

You don't sound completely okay. You sound like you'd prefer it if he settled down with you.

Make things clear with him. He sounds especially dodgy regarding the tests. If a guy dodged the question of testing, I would be very doubtful about his claims of being clean.

>>7417075
He's worth it.

He's everything a woman wants, that's why he's so successful with women, I didn't want to be with some awkward virgin guy. When I met him and we first started dated and talked about past relationships he told me he had been with over 50 women and that he wouldn't stop, then he told me if I wanted him I had to be ok with him being with other women sexually.

To be honest I don't care that much about the sex part, it'd hurt if he told me he loved one of them.

>>7417077
>>7417084
I never asked for tests, I just trust him. Maybe I will in the future, you guys are right.

>>7417086
oh my GOD you poor thing, you sound like a little manipulated girl who puts her boyfriend on a pedestal. Everything a girl wants? How bout no, because what I want is dedication.

How will it feel when you're both 60 and he wants to fuck more 20 year olds, and lay in bed with them? When he starts exclusively seeing one young girl who was just like you before you got old? And hell "love" her the way he loves you, because he can do whatever the fuck he wants as long as you're his wife who cleans the dishes. And there's no way you can tell him to stop fucking around when you're old and need company, because guess what? When you take your rule away, that's when he'll cheat on you.

This is so painfully pathetic. Reminds me of those guys on r9k who worship their girlfriends.

>>7417086
>He's worth it.
laughinggirls.jpg

What's it like not being an equal to your "soulmate"?

>>7417093
>>7417094
I'm sorry if I look pathetic, but that's between us as a couple.

>>7417086
That entire story says you just decided to put up for it [after he told you, and you didn't know beforehand what you were getting into]. #

Keep trying to justify your sad existence, doe.

>>7416767
Pretty sure he just wanted to fuck around and not settle at that point.

>>7417098
>between us
>tells people

haha, truly deluded.

>>7417098
please break up for your own good

>>7417097
>>7417093
By the way he's already over 30 so I don't think this is gonna last forever.

>>7417107
unless he balds, men age like wine, women like milk.

>>7417086
Do you really think my boyfriend is worse than yours?

Mine is a virgin nerd, but I don't see how that's bad. He doesn't cheat on me, I don't have to worry about std's and I don't have to share him with other women. The best part is that he actually loves me.

Your boyfriend on the other hand is a piece of shit.

>>7417118
Well when I take my boyfriend to conventions there's always countless girls checking him out, girls with boyfriends probably like you.

>>7416935
how about just stop being such a fucking needy possessive prick?

>>7417121
different anon but oh boy. Everyone sees right through your insecurities.

Your need to compare boyfriends as if that makes you a better girl is truly pitiful.

>>7417098
I don't really understand what's wrong with this situation. Anon is the one he comes home to at the end of the day, and she's the one that he's chosen to spend the rest of his life with. Granted, I don't actually know the situation, but as an asexual, I know that I'd never be able to satisfy my partner, so I'd be okay if they had a mistress, as long as they were open about it.

>>7417130
Finally someone with an open mind.

>>7417130

From what I understand she
>wants the D
> has been so trusting of her boyfriend she didn't even pursue the issue of getting him tested
>in general, seems like the situation is not exactly equal. Why is she waiting at home for him and his D while he's fucking fifty other girls?

Not going to comment on the last response because that might be a troll, but the situation just seems really off.

>>7417130
>she's the one that he's chosen to spend the rest of his life with.
HAH
Yeah about that...
Shes the only one who will let him use her like a ragdoll.

>>7417130
But you're asexual, aren't you just looking for a reason to attentionwhore and splerg out "im asexual!!!"?

>>7417130
>asexual
>clearly unable to satisfy sexual urges

>think you're like someone who can clearly satisfy sexual urges

Okay? Clearly she's not in the same situation as you? I don't even know why you brought it up, when its completely different.

>>7417133
>might be a troll
No, just someone very apathetic (and probably naive) about sex and relationships, so I guess I'll never fully understand why it's a problem.

>>7409921

>This whole gender thing is getting way out of hand

Finally someone says it. There's this girl I know who says she's asexual and wants to be called a guy and if you use female pronouns on her she rants.
She recently got a boyfriend she met at a con and now says she a girl again...

>>7417133
Maybe she's a whore, and he's paying for all her stuff.

>>7417147
>>7417144
There's plenty of relationships like that out there. You guys are just too brainwashed by disney movies.

Many of older Dom men have relationships with multiple young women and they're all happy with it.

>>7417150
[citation needed]

Yeah, thats why divorce rates are through the roof.

>>7417139
Nawh, if I wanted to do that, I'd do it on Tumblr.

>>7417143
Okay, I guess it might not be completely related, just thought I'd attempt to understand her situation. If I'm wrong, I'm wrong, but as >>7417150 said, there's perfectly healthy relationships like OP's.

>>7417144

Ah no, I didn't mean your comment, I meant the one where she goes

>Well when I take my boyfriend to conventions there's always countless girls checking him out, girls with boyfriends probably like you.

I should have quoted. I was lazy, but then I got misinterpreted.

>>7417153
People wouldn't be going onto cgl and talking anonymously whilst vehemently defending myself about it if it was "perfectly healthy". Just seems like outright denial specifically for her(this means I acknowledge that there are relationships like that and they work fine, but HERS doesn't due to her actions, in case you're gonna throw a bitchfit about being opan minded xDDD).

>>7417160
Oh, haha, sorry, I guess I didn't understand your intention, my mistake then.

>>7417161
I think understand what everyone's problem is, now, you're saying that he forced her to be okay with him sleeping around, thus "settling" for him, instead of finding someone more devoted?

>I feel really slow today

>>7417175
No, he never forced her, she just settled with it. But then she's saying "ohhhh its fine its great" when clearly it isnt.

>>7417192
I said it's a sacrifice I have to make for the man I love.

>>7417197
What sacrifice is he making for you?

OooooOOOooooOOOoooooh, he doesn't love you, shitttttt!

>>7417224
He supports me in many ways.

>>7417232
Thats absolutely normal in a relationship, don't you know? Its hardly a "sacrifice", I'm kind of appalled you'd even consider it a sacrifice to support your supposed partner. Keep trying, doe.

>>7415478
Oh wow, I'm on wellbutrin too! It's working so great for me. I haven't been this happy since early elementary school. It helped with my ADD too.

>>7416819
Are you me anon?
I'm a little bit of an aspie, so I didn't have any friends through middle and elementary school, and now I have trouble telling whether guys actually want to be friends or just want to get in my pants. I don't even have a horrible personality, other girls usually like me. Now I just constantly talk about my made up boyfriend to weed the dicks out.

>>7417118
wow this sounds so pathetic, is that what you tell yourself to justify the shitty sex you're having?

you just sound like an underfucked jealous bitch

>>7417391
> justify the shitty sex
>" virgin nerd"
your relationship sucks, we get it

>>7417391
Are you >>7417086 ?

Does this guy plan on marrying you soon or using you as a warm hole and place to stay?

>>7417245
whoa who are you to judge? you know next to nothing about their relationship and pretend to be oh so superior here, "doe".

>>7417409
No that wasn't me.

>>7417409
maybe, maybe not...
no matter if I said yes or no, you'd only go on believing what you want to believe, wouldn't you?

>>7417116
Whoa there, you piece of shit

>>7417409
Yes, maybe you're right and I should sit him down and have a talk with him.

>>7417409
We never talked about marriage, but we've been together for over a year now.

>>7417245 is right.

Support is normal, one-sided sacrifice isnt.

>>7417391
lolwut/10

I feel that summer is starting early.

All these emotes are driving me mad.
It's not like it's even the emotes that I hate, it's the knowledge that the poster therefore hasn't lurked and learnt board culture.
If they haven't done that, they're probably spewing all sorts of nonsense, and misinformation, too.

>>7417086
>>7417047
>>7417232
Hey well, do whatever works for you until it doesn't, that's what I say.
As long as you're happy.

Break up when you're not.

>>7417445
>just go pursue that woman's degree in woman's study if itll make you happy even though its a waste of thousands of dollars!!!
>bitch and whine that you cant get a job after studying womans studies
>we told you so

>>7417232
I love how vague you are on it. How secure!

>>7417423
>>7417421

Since i'm not sure which is actually >>7417086

Some things to think about from a woman who has been in your shoes and had a few of these things happen before leaving him:

>How will you feel when he's unavailable to go out an evening with you because he's with another woman?

>How will you feel when he uses money to buy other women things?

>How would you feel if one of the women 'accidentally' let themselves get pregnant and he will then be tied to childsupport.

>How will you feel when you grow older and his girlfriends grow younger?

>How will you feel sitting on a cold table in the OBGYN being told your partner lied about their STD history and you have one from his many women?

>How will you feel when he refuses to talk about marriage and would rather spend time with other women who have no current interest in long-term plans (this would be you, right now).

>>7417430
It's not sacrifice when you expect the other person to do something in return.

>>7417454
nice b8 m8

>>7417005
>>7417009
>Super out of touch with trends
>Huh whats that
>Google
>Thats not too bad like not that great but whatever
>Close tab
>Wait how much were those
>Look again
>mfw

>>7417490
Woah, I just... I had no idea either anon. Reminds me of those hats that I make that retail at $170 just because it's a big name.

>Seriously, though, it cost me $7 and three hours to make, and end up selling them for $40

>>7417022
My mom knew after year 2 but us kids were so small and my dad was very manipulative and had the money. She knew that he'd do some shit to get custody and she didn't want that woman to be any kind of mother for us.

>>7417467
It's not easy, as I said it's a sacrifice.

I'm hoping once we get married and have children he will settle down.

>>7417524
>hoping he'll settle down for your sacrifices
Then its not a sacrifice.

>>7417524
Uggggh seriously. Do not reproduce. Don't drag innocent children into your shitty, loveless relationship. My god
>wants to say no one could possibly be this selfish, but so many bitches who are codependent and deluted are.

>>7417524

Holy fucking shit anon, are you deluded? Are you fucking seriously hoping he'll 'settle down' when you have kids? Do you realise how little evidence you have for this assumption? You haven't even discussed kids with him, and you have that expectation?

Holy fucking shit anon, if you're not a troll, please do the right thing. Listen to one of your friends who's against this at least, get some help, get the fuck out of this.

>>7417536
I'm afraid I'll never get a man like him.

>>7417546
There are plenty of guys willing to stop chasing skirts and stay with one heart.

>>7417552
Not the type of guys I like.

>>7416778
>>7416840
http://item.taobao.com/item.htm?id=37688253802
http://item.taobao.com/item.htm?id=37685735990
I don't think there's a skirt replica yet.

>>7417556

>>7417556
You like guys that are interested in multip... wait. Anon are you mormon? No offense. Youre still going to have to live with the fact that he may only be looking for the next best thing. You will never be able to relax when he is constantly looking for new girls. Eventually he may find he likes one of them more. Its just a relationship that cannot work without marriage (the mormon kind).

>>7417569
I mean the sort of man I like tend to be promiscuous.

>>7417556
Then maybe you should be in therapy? I mean if you're truly, genuinely happy and the fears the the anon above listed don't bother you, then go with it. But if they cause you pain then you need to seriously consider why it is that you're leading yourself down this road.

>>7417578
are you with other guys, too? is he okay with you being with other men if you want to?

>>7417594
I'm not with anybody else.

>>7417600
but if you wanted to be, would he be okay w it?

Cmon guys, lets get over the crazy girl that likes mansluts. She got herself into the mess, leave her alone so she can suffer in her own mess.

>>7417602
its pretty clear that she's going to not answer it and say "oh b-but i would never do that! i lurrrve him suuuh much"!

>>7417602
No he wouldn't be ok with that.

>>7417619
And I wouldn't like a man who would be ok with that. Men like that aren't real men for me.

>>7417619
that's really weird. you should ultimately do what you want, but please don't have children with someone like that. my parents were similar (father stepped out all the time, would get angry if my mom was even 20 minutes late from work or went out without telling him where) and I was begging them to divorce since I knew what it was.

>>7417630
The thing is that I'm very submissive and he's very dominant. That's why our relationship is like that.

>>7417637
I'm a sub too, but if you're hoping he'll settle down eventually, that tells me that he doesn't really respect you? like, what if he keeps pushing you and then goes past any limits you have? that could really fuck you up

>>7414524
Its okay anon, you'll find a partner who can handle it.

>>7417641
It sounds stupid but I'm happy as long as he's happy.

>>7417637

I'm a 'sub' and my boyfriend is loyal to me. I still have a say in the relationship. When I have a problem with his actions, I voice it out and he takes consideration. Unless you're doing the 24/7 lifestyle thing, your sexual preferences in the bedroom shouldn't leak into real life.

>>7417712
Well that's my personality even outside the bedroom.

>>7417490
>>7417506
I'd never heard of Lilly Pullitzer before either..
178 dolla dolla bills for this. And it's popular? I guess some weeby buttons can't be all that bad.

>>7417725
To upper-middle class and rich white women, it's "cute" and "quirky". She makes school supplies too, quite a few kids I tutor have these ugly little notebooks and folders.
It's okay though, I think the designer died that year or something.

>>7417736
*this year

>>7417524
They get worse then, never better...because they know it will be even harder for you to walk away if you have to divorce them.

>>7417712
Subs usually have more say though...

>>7417086
Really

I'm a virgin guy and I find it hilarious how you women look down on me while you're sucking the dick of a man who fucks other women who aren't you.

>>7417770
We don't look down on you anon (this isnt the low esteem girl you're replying to fyi). Unless you use the fact that your virginity is --because-- of other women, then yes, we would look down on you. Otherwise, to some girls, you're their fetish <3

>>7417785
Sorry, I meant women like her.

By the other answers it's obvious everyone thinks she has issues.

>>7417434
Me too anon. Worse, peolpe keep defending them.

>>7417123
Not even that anon, but:
Possessive? What the fuck?
Not wanting to be cheated on is now possessive?

You sound French.

Seeing as this has turned into a relationship advice thred, how do you get out of a relationship that you have a long-term lease on?

>>7418245
Tell me you don't mean married anon. If you're not living together, just break it to them like a normal person. Sit down and talk to them about it. If you're not wanting to work things out, tell them that at the beginning.

>>7417758

I guess that's what I was trying to get at? I was the first one who suggested we go BDSM.

>>7417637
>>7417641
>>7417712
>>7417758
>>7418336
Disclaimer: In proper BDSM both partners have immense respect and compassion for the other.
Beyond safe words (which are important, use them until you're positive either can end the scene without one), knowing the other's body language that seeps past the scene is vital. From minor adjustments in severity to realizing your partner is actually having a nervous breakdown.
They'll know how to do proper after care and make sure the sub doesn't actually believe they're a dirty, worthless, cum-stained whore. Because it ISN'T REAL. That sub is getting spit on because she loves it, not because she literally "deserves it."
Any "dom" who tries to sell you bullshit about what a "true sub" looks like is just an abusive fuck. You and you alone decide your limits and you decide if you're okay with them being pushed. Any decent dom who has an ounce of humanity will respect you fully with your decision.
Being a sub is awesome because you choose and control how you give up your control. When you lose that initial control, what you're losing is consent. That's rape and that's abuse.
>Don't let this happen to you!
Safe Sane and Consensual. Never forget that and don't let anyone tell you otherwise.

>>7409048
Cosplay feel:
> Toned Stomach
> cosplaying Neliel from bleach
> Found out pregnant
> Con is 3 Months away
> Already made costume
> Pregnant Bulge

>>7416767
>Looking down on male virgins is fine

Ok

>desperate on finding a boyfriend and having a long lasting relationship
>met this guy
>he is everything I wanted and even more
>have a date at his place in a few days
>romantic dinner

That's some good feels. And to keep it lolita related :
>'anon, I like your dresses a lot, you look so cute in it'
>he genuinly like lolita.