/cgl/ - Cosplay & EGL

I truly feel that there is no one worth knowing in these types of hobbies. Cosplay, lolita, cons, these are all havens for socially maladjusted losers who turn out to be more bitter and caustic than average ""normalfags"".
On the other hand, engaging in other creative hobbies like art, music, and woodworking has led to meeting so many amazing people, including my current girlfriend.

>>10910764
Go away moid

One of my biggest fantasies is going to an anime convention with a girl and letting her use me as her personal human ATM.

>I will pay for her travel costs
>I will pay for her hotel room
>I will pay for her entry fee
>I will pay for her cosplay if she chooses to dress up
>I will pay for all her meals
>I will pay for anything she wants to buy from the merch booths
>I will perform any additional favors or tasks she desires. Carrying her things, saving her place in long lines, taking pictures of her, etc

The most important part is that even though I will be there with her, I will make sure to keep a respectable distance between us. Close enough that she can call me over to borrow my wallet when she wants to buy something, and give me her bags to carry for her, but far enough away that nobody will look at us and think we are a couple. This way she will be free to flirt with any guys she meets there and get hit on. If I'm lucky, she'll let me wait outside of her hotel room while she hooks up with them.

>dressed up as Miku for Miku Concert
>no one came up to me to say my outfit looked nice
>go up to several cosplayers and compliment them
>"Thanks, your miku outfit is cute too!"
>feels nothin', man, say "thank you" and move on

The only person that took my pic is a mexican girl who took a pic of me and her friend together. that was nice

When I go to cons, I really need to stop focusing on quantity by trying to take pics of so many cosplayers. It makes me miss chances for social opportunities and making friends with people who'd be interested in talking to me.
>>10910760
where's that pic from?
>>10910770
sajj

>>10910764
All of these hobby spaces have wonderful people in them and unfriendly people in them. I do hear about drama in far away communities but I've never personally experienced that in the communities I've been in (cosplay, lolita, art, other creative hobbies). I don't think I got unusually lucky, I think the drama is the exception not the rule.

>>10910776
Anime North

On one hand, I want to cosplay something I'm passionate about because that's the entire point.
On the other hand, I want to cosplay something popular because I experienced the unfathomable dopamine hit of someone asking to take a picture with me and that memory will stay with me for the rest of my life as it is quite possibly the only time anyone I don't already know has been that interested in me.
Conundrum.

>>10910770
When I went to Miku Expo in NYC, I saw a girl at the bar dressed as Miku. It was so cute.

Let the threadly con karaoke posts, commence! I can sweep the floor with 90% of singers on a bad day. I'm now so self-assured, I'm gonna sign up for a contest the next time I see one. Feels good already man

>>10910760
>>10910784
Is it bad that I knew she had to be Canadian because I recognized her underwear as being from La Senza?

>watching IkeNotMike videos while drinking
>see his AWA experience
>recognize one of the Air Force guys I do work for (I do air base supply) cosplaying Nanami
>almost certain it's him
>want to ask him to confirm since he visits my office constantly but don't want to be creepy/reveal powerlevel
Wat do

>>10911214
Maybe you could put up like a mainstream shonen anime poster in your office? And perhaps just see what happens from there - at least, I think this would be like a more passive / relatively innocuous way of approaching things.

(I just mention shonen in particular since that's mainstream and a relatively "normie" thing now, not like having a Boku no Pico poster or something crazy like that)

Maybe even something like a small anime-related figure or plushie - I guess something more on the inconspicuous side - this would allow him to engage / initiate rather than you (since you mentioned he visits your office a lot - he's bound to see it eventually)

My dream dress is on LM for a great price in perfect condition but the auction’s gonna end at 3 in the morning. God help me

>>10911260
if it's really your dream dress then set an alarm, wake up on time and place your final bid, and then don't complain about the sleep you miss out on.

>>10911263
It is a dream dress but my sleep is heavier than normal due to medication I’m on. I’m gonna set an alarm and try to stay awake anyways.

>>10910760
For some reason, my friend was worried that I might be after his sister, so he made me scroll through all of her "spicy" cosplay without getting a boner. He gave me a B- because "it moved a little" but I still wonder if things will be weird between the three of us now.

>>10911269
Set 20 alarms if you need to. Godspeed, nona!!! Share the dress with us after you win it

>>10911283
Stop posting these stupid little stories. No one gives a shit.

>>10911214
Damn. I've been to every con this guy featured sans DragonCon. Maybe I oughta keep an eye out for him at Colossal. But it does raise the question, are there any REALLY successful "convention lifestyle" channels? Cause I've never found any

>>10910808
ime though far fewer people recognize a niche cosplay the people that do are WAY more excited. I mean there's always the fear of the "literally nobody recognized me" nightmare scenario... but people are more likely to react strongly to the only person they've ever seen cosplay a character versus the tenth Yor they've seen that day.

>>10911283
is this real??? m

>>10911345
no, it's a troll posting made up stories.

>>10911332
I think con life people are just tiktokers trying to get a foot up by pandering to anime people

being a lifestyler is hard, i have no normie clothes (work from home) so i have no alternatives. been doing this for a decade. sometimes i don't have the energy to dress up but i hype myself up for it anyway. i just always want to be cute!

>>10911548
Got any comfy cutsew ops?

>>10911548
cutsews, cutsew dresses, room wear.

There's also a lot of lolita adjacent cute comfy casual wear to hang out at home in.

>>10910760
>tfw I tell my wife some vendor was "a Godzilla nerd," and my daughter starts screaming in the middle of the con, "Mom! Dad said the N word! Dad said the N word!"

I'm not either, but I'm asking because I keep seeing this pattern.
I wonder if christian men actually prefer atheist women, woo them under the pretense of atheism, and keep their true beliefs a secret until they want to get rid of the atheist partner guilt-free.
Then they deliberately overact their lunatic tendencies to get their partner to leave them.
If they dated christian women, they would have no premarital or wild sex (well, except that an anonymous survey revealed that many christian men don't see buttsex as sinful), and would have to actually make it work.
They can just lament that their "conversion attempt" failed, and so, are unequally yolked or something, and thus, free to ditch them.
Thoughts?

>>10911672

christian men want a christian women in the streets and an OF woman behind closed doors, but they can’t handle what it takes to be in a relationship with an OF woman and everything that comes with

>still haven't found a dragoncon room
I don't wanna stay offsite, bros...

>>10911672
There's some muslim guys in my college who talked about doing something similar. They're allowed to date non muslim girls as long as they don't marry them. They date and fuck around a lot (hiding their religion, not introducing the gf to their parents) and dump their girlfriends guilt free when it suits them. Their parents are fine with it. If the girl isn't muslim they don't consider it serious anyway. A few of these guys said they were absolutely dreading the moment their parents would force them to marry muslim women, they see it as an end of their life.

>>10911672
>>10911707
Men just lie to sleep with women. It's not any deeper than that.

>>10910760
Well, my sister officially kicked the big titty girl out of her cosplay crew. I'm really going to miss them.

>>10912262
Was she jealous

>>10912275
Idk, something about how tits girl kept trying to make her cry for fun. It sounded bad. God she's hot though.

>>10911672
Wtf am I reading?

>>10911694
No. Men just want you to only turn your whore on for them and nobody else when you're in a relationship.

I love seeing all the fat whores that bullied me struggle to pay their roach motel rent and getting even fatter while I get skinnier and richer. Seethe and burn, hogs.

>>10911641
>and my daughter starts screaming in the middle of the con, "Mom! Dad said the N word! Dad said the N word!"
cute

>>10912414
How old are they and how are you getting richer?

>>10912317
This hoe cope has been around since forever, replace OF with strippers/sluts/whatever
Hoe sleeps with male hoes forming a hoe circlejerk, and then thinks everyone a hoe or closet hoe but everyone else sees them as a walking red flag
>>10912317
Pretty much

>>10912512
Late 20s early 30s. I’m just autistically good with money.

I'm unironically considering paying a cosplay girl to be my girlfriend for a day. No sex or intimacy but cuddling and hanging together without worries or being judged sounds nice...

I just like seeing women in dresses or skirts. I simply do not like seeing women wear pants. If I could live somewhere where women aren't allowed to wear pants I would move there. I have always been this way. It annoys me when my wife wears pants.

>>10910769
You should be beaten until you no longer are physically capable of posting on the internet.

>>10911694
What is an OF woman behind closed doors? That is an idiosyncratic concept.

>>10912590
Not "idiosyncratic". I mean "paradoxical". I am tired.

>>10911672
idk what this has to do with cosplay but wow what a shocker that religious men are assholes

>>10911291
And out herself on cgl? Nice try, retard

>>10911694
I want to fuck a hot slut.

After dwelling on it, I can say, yes, complacence is part of why I'm not enjoying cons as much. Stuff that seems normal today would have been insane when I first started attending, and stuff that seemed insane at the time would be "Eh" at best now. Will that improve my experiences going forward? Dunno. But at least I feel more grateful, and plan to be on the look out for new ways of spicing things up

I need a redheaded weeb gf that is obsessed with Evangelion. Not for cosplay purposes, it's just that I had enough with dating normies.

>>10912317
>No. Men just want you to only turn your whore on for them and nobody else when you're in a relationship.
So men want a faithful, monogamous relationship with lots of sex?

>>10912700
Yes. It's disgusting.

>>10912700
Men want you to be faithful. I don't want to be faithful to you. I'm thinking of your sister, your mom, or your best friends after the 30th time I blow a load in one of your holes. Every time I go out of town I'm getting a hooker or going to a massage parlour. Sorry, just a fact.

>>10912777
and that's why women don't bother

>>10912588
Why do you not discipline your wife?

>>10910770
Anon, I'd do the same thing. I've never been into Miku or any Vokaloid shit, but I know who she is and I've seen tons of cosplays of her online already. So I'd compliment you but not take your picture unless I was taking one out of politeness since you took mine.

>>10911214
Anime and cosplay are practically mainstream now. At least, you're probably not gonna get fired for it anymore. Just ask the guy if he's into anime since you saw someone who looked liked him in a costume. Best workplace of my life was when I finally dropped my shields and let my coworkers know I was a mega anime nerd, turns out several coworkers who didn't seem like the anime type at all were into the same niche series as me.

>>10911338
Even if it used to be a super popular cosplay, if it's rare now you still get that huge nostalgia hit when you see them. I wish I could go to a con just full of 80s and 90s anime cosplayers. I wanna be surrounded by Lains, Shinjis, Spikes and Ranmas.

>>10912588
>If I could live somewhere where women aren't allowed to wear pants I would move there.
Saudi Arabia beckons you

>>10912792
>Lains, Shinjis
popular on tiktok
>Spikes and Ranmas
still oldfag material

>>10910760
Thinking about the time my comm was taking selfies in the bathroom, some lady in the stall farted really loud, and the autistic girl told her "Hey! Stop that."

>>10912822
I'm in my 30s, visiting TikTok would end in someone's untimely death. Plus, oh yeah, it's not real life.

An organizer from our con may go to jail.

>>10912976
just stop, no-one thinks these are fun

These kids said they liked my costume at the con I went to.
The character was really obscure, and there's no earthly way they recognized him

>>10913256
They just thought you looked cool

>>10910764
you are the problem. anywhere you go there is at least one person worth knowing, either for their personality, character or simply because they are a good human being. you probably suck in so many ways it'd take years of therapy to unpack so don't even bother replying.

>>10913249
What did they do?

>>10913260
Based and true

>>10911672
I dated a woman for 2 years without any sexual activity due to shared moral convictions, but she left me to follow her career. I guess that makes me the chump. I don't know if I want the alternative, though. C'est la vie.

>>10910764
Yeah, I'm a fucked up freak. Do what you must.

I really, really, really miss being in college and going to the college anime club 2x a week; now I know no one and am alone.

>>10912317
Jokes on you, I want to turn my current gf into a whore for other women and men

>>10913438
OP is absolutely correct , people who have gone to cons for 10+ years know that the environment is toxic and friend groups keep to themselves to avoid drama.

These friends you make in the cosplay scene will sell you out in a moments notice for a crumb of clout

>>10913249
How many people actually cosplay in diapers?

>>10913471
He's only correct about clout chasing cosplayers. The people who don't care about e-fame aren't a problem.

I enjoy subscribing and being part of discords and groups about cosplayers but there's always a thought in the back of my mind that it will never come to anything. I won't make lasting friends and the cosplayers I support will move one day. I plan to meet them and take some photos and that will be a good memory, and I love the cosplay they do. It's just this impending sense that nothing matters and I don't matter that annoys me.

>>10913469
Stop ruining other women, shitcunt.

>>10913683
It’s not ruining if she wants it, retard. Consent is king. Don’t be mad that no one wants your faggot ass.

>Going up to somebody's room to have drinks with them
>mfw there's a guy or three in the corner glued to their gaming laptops not saying a word to anyone
Did you ever see anything so kudaranai?

>>10913722
They sound based

>>10913469
Wha? You're a cuck! A literal cuck!

I wonder how I would go about making a leather jacket for myself.

>>10910760
>tfw my home town anime con died
>like losing an old friend I met 15 years ago and we only see each other once a year
>decide to hang up my cosplaying, I’m getting too old anyway
>new con pops up in the city, not interested
>two cosplay buddies im close with are very interested, both years younger than I
>guess I’m cosplaying again
>make my costume, do my crafts, spend a lot of money getting good materials
>wife wants to join in, but completely separate series
>make her shit too
>see friends this week to talk about the con
>oh we just bought everything

>>10913750
>Work hard to make a cosplay as amazing as I can
>Congoers are impressed
>They keep asking where I bought it from
This hurts me as a craftsman and a poorfag.

>>10910760
A girl from my comm who's 22 but looks 12 keeps joking that she should start a LonelyHands account and "make bank off pedos." She jokes about it so much, I'm pretty sure it's no longer a joke.

>>10913831
>looks 12
I strongly doubt that unless she has a medical condition. 12yos are all awkward in their proportions and body language. Almost every chick I've seen who claims to look like a child is just a womanlet with an ectomorph body type.

>>10913831
>>10913846
I have a close friend who's 33 but very petite and slender and with a pretty youthful face for her age, and yeah, she can look quite young at first glance and even wears a lot of clothes made for 10-12 year olds (she's broke and they're cheap) but when you really look at her body in detail she's definitely not the same as an actual kid.

Honestly if the girl from you comm wants to do stuff like that it doesn't even have to be targeted at actual pedos, there are a lot of guys who are into petite flat adults and a relatively small number of girls making content for them.

>>10913831
>>10913846
>>10913860
some women get off by pretending to be children and getting "molested" by pedophiles. absolutely sickening. some even buy used japanese clothing from mercari from actual children brands like mezzopiano, etc.

I just hate e-thots in general. "Pedo" or not they have this annoying attitude where it's not their fault that they are taking people's money.
If a normal person sees that a guy can't make rent because he is throwing his money away they would go "Wow buddy stop. Intervention time". When a thot sees that she goes "It's not my fault he is giving me his money". Same with gambling establishments and drug dealers.
Don't get me wrong, the paypigs deserve it all. But bitch, you're supplying the market and even converting underage teens into simps and "pedos" because you're advertising in their spaces. Own up to taking advantage of them.

>>10913901
supply isn't to blame for demand, anon. there's no victim in the scenario you described other than the paypig being a victim of his own bad habits. it's no one's responsibility to look after others.

>>10913892
My friend's sister did a Tiktok where her cosplay was bunched up in the crotch, and it was her most viewed by far because of all the femboy accounts drooling over the "hot twink."

I think she needs to embrace this demographic. Sock in the pants for every video, become a femboy icon.

>>10913901
I would guess the majority of guys spending on OF aren't literally bankrupting themselves with spending addiction. Most people have dumb shit they waste money on without destroying their lives for it. You're acting like some thot charging money to show her tits is the same as heroin

I wore a new JSK for the first time today. It was pretty nice, I looked surprisingly good in reflections.
I should get new shoes, because my current ones limit the amount of happiness I can get from wearing lolita with how they make my feet hurt.
But I'm not feeling excitement right now.

I need social interaction. I went out yesterday with some people I know, I should be happy, but I've been longing to meet friends all day, and I want to meet someone tomorrow. But I don't know who to ask, I feel like I have a reason to not ask any of the people I feel it's acceptable to ask. I wish I could meet people whenever I wanted. And I'm thinking about summer, it'll be so bad, even easter was a bad experience and summer will be many times longer, so alone and with nothing to do.

>>10913966
sounds hot, post pic or link

>>10913975
reeeeeeee I want to meet someone but literally, LITERALLY who can I meet
I'm the biggest loser in the world, not having people I can hang out with when I want to
I'm losing my group at university as well
could I at least talk to someone on messages, but the person I've been talking the most to lately I'm supposed to have a limited range of topics with and I shouldn't bother them by talking too much. I wish I could just meet up with them, we only talk when we're forced to be together and we never get anywhere in our conversations before we separate, and I never feel like I get to say everything I want to.

There's also a major holiday next week and I'll probably be all alone, as usual, maybe I'll try to distract myself with anime, as usual. One person in my classes mentioned maybe meeting up though so I got some hope.

>>10913970
Yeah, personally I just have basic $5-15 subs to a few girls and never really go beyond that. I have pretty specific taste and corporate porn where the girls are obviously only doing stuff for a paycheck turns me off, so when I find somebody who fits my taste AND seems to be doing stuff because she's actually into it it's worth a few bucks for an ongoing supply of fap material instead of having to spend ages trying to find something good in the mountain of unappealing stuff I can find for free.

>>10913970
>You're acting like some thot charging money to show her tits is the same as heroin
it can be, depending on the thot and the simp, if both factors match, there you go, full heroine

I guess I'm autistic but I don't understand why people feel lonely when they are alone.

Hey I don't know if this is the right place for this but I need some help.
I'm going to my first major convention soon and I'm worried that I'm going to be embarrassed and cringing the whole time. I went to a small local con once before and that's what it was like.
I don't want to be that way, but ideas like "hiding your power level" have been drilled into me from too early and I can't get rid of them. I know that these conventions are celebrations of my own hobbies, but I can't help but feel some sort of shame when seeing them in real life like that.

Any tips on getting rid of those feelings?

>>10914023
I start the day buzzed and end up smashed. I don't care anymore and can be free to be myself.

>>10914000
>Yeah, personally I just have basic $5-15 subs to a few girls
You're still part of the problem and why foids are so entitled these days with skyhigh standards. I will never understand simp retards like you who can't even rizz up 1 bitch to send him nudes for free.

>>10913975
>>10913980
Extroverts be like "I haven't had social contact in five minutes. I'm meltiiing! What a world...!"
I guess you could watch Murder Drones on youtube and join the threads on /trash/. They're active during american hours. They used to be buzzing with activity all around the clock back on /co/ but the mods are sods and banished it.
What anime are you planning on watching anyway.

>>10914003
It is an instict meant to keep us together because individually we are predator chow. It becomes stronger as you grow up and as the people around you resemble you less and less. You'll come to feel it even if you're an antisocial lone wolf. It'll just take years.

I hate drinking. Why do I keep doing it? I never feel good the next morning but everyone insists we go out. I’ll just sit in my room next time.

>>10914061
Go out with them but don't consume alcohol. Ask for the bartender's tallest glass of milk

>>10910760
looking in the mirror trying on cosplays I've been working on and seeing how ugly I am is doing alot of mental damage and I hate myself

>>10914055
>You'll come to feel it even if you're an antisocial lone wolf
Nah

>>10914070
I know that feel. I exclusively go for masked/helmeted characters so I don't embarrass my girlfriend when we go to cons.

>>10914069
Haha I asked for his finest tap water last night after I got tired of drinking and he got a good chuckle out of it.

>>10914003
once in a blue moon I get a certain burst of loneliness out of nowhere but I enjoy being alone most of the time. I do envy people that are sociable though it looks like they’re having tons of fun.

>>10914054
I can and have, even my female best friend has given me nudes and been effectively naked in front of me before. I just have some stuff I'm into that no girl I've been able to find IRL is into.

>All my acquaintances from 90s anime and convention scene are starting to disappear or die in their 40s.
>Dealers hall/artist alley has almost 60%-80% merch I don't recognize. Hardly anyone carries vintage anime goods.
>Starting to get the age where it's really not fine to go to an anime con alone. I should have a wife and kids by now, or a gf again at least so I don't look like weird old dude at con.

I'm not just getting old, I'm literally watching my era disappear from history. Feels bad man.

>>10914147
>Starting to get the age where it's really not fine to go to an anime con alone. I should have a wife and kids by now, or a gf again at least so I don't look like weird old dude at con.
Stop living your life by other people's made up standards.

>>10914160
Those things became standards for a good reason.

>>10914161
What is that reason?

>>10914163
1. healthy society
2. somebody needs to pay the pensions

>>10914164
Anon never said he was unemployed

>have always done cosplays of no specific named characters, more just outfits that belong to certain settings like a pokemom Team Magma member for example
>friend convinces me to do a duo cosplay of characters from a show
>can't stop comparing myself to the character, even if the cosplay fits my body perfectly I just feel like a horrible representation of who the character is supposed to be and look like
I hate this feeling so much I shouldn't have agreed

>>10914055
>What anime are you planning on watching anyway.
Nothing in particular, I've barely watched any anime in the past year anyway. Maybe it doesn't end up being anime.
I have been wanting to do a real rewatch of Princess Tutu for a while though, I have started a few times in the past but never gotten past the first few episodes. But I have this fantasy of forcing people I know to marathon it with me, it'll never happen though so I should just watch it if I want to. I've been listening a lot to the soundtrack lately, which is nice, and maybe it'd be better to watch it a day that's more quiet so I can enjoy the soundtrack more anyway.

I think I've lost the final few people I was able to sit with at lectures, the few people who were still coming have found different groups to be with, so I got no one left, I'm back to where I began, always being alone.

Not looking forward to summer at all, it'll be so lonely and boring, and I'll lose all motivation for everything, but it probably won't be much better when summer is over either, I lost my lecture people which will remain true, and I'll probably lose three of my favorite people from classes too, when they move or advance to higher levels while I remain.

My family was shitty and malfunctional. My mom got pregnant with my older brother to force my dad into a marriage so she could use him as a meal ticket. Now I just learned that initially they wanted to give my brother away to be raised by a childless aunt and uncle and break up because my dad didn't want to get married and my mother wanted someone richer. Why can't these assholes be at least a bit normal.

>>10914194
What you just described is normal. Normal and boring. Being a kind, good, and supportive partner is and always has been rare. If you don't like that fact, you can get a trusy old tack hammer and smash your skull plate in until you are dead.

>>10914199
nayrt, but I think this is a strange and not common situation. Maybe this is normal in your culture, I don't know.

>>10914208
I'm a white American Christian Republican man and tons of my family and friends have had messy divorces. Very common in my church. Not sure what shit hole brown country you're from.

>>10914212
>white American Christian Republican man
>messy divorces
>church
>shit hole brown country

thanks for the bait

>>10914142
Fair enough, but why not pay an escort for it? You get to fuck/cum at least and she's paid to fulfill your fetish.

>>10914231
Escorts are expensive and illegal where I live, and the stuff I'm into doesn't really work with them (exhibitionism, and it's all about the girl having that fetish and getting super turned on leading to amazing sex afterwards), plus I honestly just don't really enjoy having sex with strangers, it's so much better when it's somebody you're comfortable and familiar with and when there's an emotional connection there.

>>10914142
>my female best friend has given me nudes
The anime I watch teaches me that this means she wants to be more than friends

>>10914258
Part of her definitely does, she's even admitted it on a few occasions while really drunk or whatever, but she feels that if we get together it HAS to be a serious LTR and she's going through some shit right now and isn't ready for one. I'm moving away in a couple of months and personally I'd be willing to take her with me and think that getting out of our current shithole would be the best thing for her but she's got a bunch of unresolved shit here that she's determined to settle and is really scared of being in a situation where she's dependent on me and doesn't have a fallback if the relationship goes bad because a similar situation really fucked her over in her last relationship.

At the last con I went to I bought something from the artists alley. I never buy anything from the artists alley, but this artist was so nice and they also offered me a discount.

As soon as a cosplayer starts posting photos with her boyfriend I lose interest in her. It's not like I fantasize about becoming her boyfriend, but it happens on its own. It's worse if she does lewd content, if she does lewd content and as a boyfriend I cannot bring myself to renew my subscription. I guess I see them as cosplayer idols.

>>10914292
Just tell her she'll never do better than you and if she doesn't at least try it, she'll regret it for the rest of her life. Then when she's isolated from her friends you can start up an OF for her and really make bank. IT's what a did with a few of my gfs. The dumb whore is already giving you nudes, it would be so easy to make some buckaroos off her while you blow her back out.

>>10914668
She's actually already done some OF-type stuff, when she was with her ex-husband and they were desperate for money during the pandemic, the nudes she gave me were actually from that. She has a rare and, to some guys, desirable body type (basically a legal loli) and I'm a former pro photographer so I've talked to her about doing more of that sort of stuff at a higher quality level than what she had before, and we've moved a bit toward more risque stuff in shoots we've done together, but she doesn't want to do full nudity again.

>Just tell her she'll never do better than you and if she doesn't at least try it, she'll regret it for the rest of her life.
This conversation has already been had and she actually agrees with it herself, tells me a lot how much better I am than other guys she's been close to in her life and stuff too, but she's really traumatized from bad past experiences and abusive relationships, and is really fixated on the idea of getting closure for some of those things and becoming independent and self-sufficient before getting into another relationship, and also has pretty fucked self-esteem and is convinced that she ruins the life of every guy she gets with and will do the same to me if we get together. (Thing is I actually know the details of her last couple of relationships and the guys in question were already fucked up loser manchildren with drug problems etc. and in reality she's just beating herself up over not being able to fix dudes who were already lost causes and horrifically inappropriate partners for her.)

>>10914692
Ah, gotcha, one of those. The next time she's opening up to you when she says "Oh, I could never be with you even though I want to" just give her a solid smack. Nothing too hard, but hard enough to sting and leave a red mark. It will activate her to be submissive to you. Then see my previous suggestion.

>>10913980
The holiday is getting close and it's going to suck as usual. I should have fled to a different country.
I won't do anything with my classmates. I did sign up for hot dogs though, but it's an open event for people who study the same as me, so going there means nothing and I'm not close with any of the people I study with either, there's a real, great risk that I just end up being alone, not included with any of the smaller groups talking.
The worst day of the year.
And it's not just this year either, I have never spent the days with friends, and I have been alive for many years.
It really shows where I actually am socially. The people in my class were talking about their plans, and I think everyone had something with people who actually want to be with them. And if anyone didn't, I'm sure this year is an exception and they usually do.
I may actually never have met anyone who's less liked than me, and this day illustrates it so well.
I was kind of considering asking a jfashion community in a different country for a last minute meetup, but I'm not really a part of any communities anyway and no one would have wanted to, and it's not that fun to spend the whole day traveling either.

Got accepted to a PhD program on the other side of the country and invited to Los Alamos National Lab for a month to get up to speed with research. My lifts are up; my weight is back down. I'm also doing the cornball heritage trip to Ireland with family in at the end of the month.

I still got it. I'm still a colonial cavalier yeehaw punk rock n roll Irish nuclear cowboy '80s tough guy.

>>10914802
it's dangerous to go alone, take this:
"the celtic heroic age"

Trying to think of a character to cosplay sends my mind on strange and depressing tangents.
>why don't I finish shows anymore?
>why can't my favorite franchises stay good?
>have I really not played a single game made this year? or last year?
>what am I even doing with my free time these days?

Received a 2006 Baby OP in the mail and I'm appalled by the quality. It wasn't one of their cheaper releases or a lucky pack dress. In fact, it's a relatively expensive OTT release, yet the construction, sewing job and some design choices are honestly on par with Taobao. I'm so disappointed, I never expected it from old/mid-school Baby. I was excited to put together a coord with it, but I know I'll never be able to wear a dress of this quality, so on LM it goes. What a bummer.

>>10914802
Hell yeah brother!

>>10914921
>why can't my favorite franchises stay good?
>have I really not played a single game made this year? or last year?
"You have to force behaviours".

I found the sex videos of a 10/10 cosplayer and now when I see her cosplaying I can't help but imagine her sucking cock and stroking it really hard. God I want to fuck her

In my mid-20's and I'm tired of being single. I had one relationship last year and although it barely lasted a month, I loved every single moment (when things didn't go to shit of course), so a relationship is something I'd like to pursue again.

Although I genuinely think I'm a pretty handsome dude, I get no matches on dating apps, so I have to go outside, touch grass and talk to women.

I'm a college graduate and I work from home. My hobbies are just video games and the occasional anime/tv show so literally the only place I can organically meet people with a shared interest are anime conventions.

I went to a few conventions but I've only really had success this year where I actively tried to talk to more women, I went one day and conversated with around 8-10 girls, I grabbed their insta's but I only managed to meet up with 2 of them outside of the convention, and those meetups didn't result in anything meaningful. I think the main problem is that I only approached cosplayers exclusively.

I'm going to another one soon and I think this time I'll try to reach out to more people who aren't in cosplay, as I think the cosplayers are already getting stopped for photos and hounded for their instas all the time anyway, so it's pretty stiff competition if I just only approach the cosplayers.

I just wanna stress that i'm not a creep or anything, the moment I get a whiff they're not interested, I tell them to have a nice day and I walk away asap.

I just want my shy NEET gf bros. Pic related

Now more than ever am I grateful to not be a MIDwest fag

>>10916072
>conversated

>>10910764
>I tried to turn my autism convention into a dating event and it didn't go well
>how could this have happened to me

>>10916908
To be fair that's basically what cons started out as, and what they were until about 2010; not exclusively dating specifically but socializing and meeting new people in general and dating and hookups were definitely part of that. The idea of cons as these things where people just go to see commercial booths and panels with their existing friends and to get photographed in cosplay (that they didn't even make!) but not to socialize with anybody new would have been unthinkable 20 years ago.

>>10916911
I don't go to cons to make friends, and I have zero social media, which is anathema to normalfags and normalfag-adjacents. I go to cons to cosplay, see other people's cosplays, and participate in the real-life 4chan threads that take place at the panels because I find them fucking hilarious to witness. I don't chase pussy either, I'm just there for fun. At most I'll chat with people I think are cool or have cool cosplays and then peace out.

I'm unironically in love with a cosplayer I follow on Instagram, fuck. She's so gorgeous and funny

>>10916958
You don't actually know her + she's never heard of you + you're a broke fat neckbeard with a tiny dick + she has chads in her social circle that mog you in every way + you have nothing in common with her other than this hobby + if you tried to cold approach her she'd laugh
Hope I saved you an embarrassment. Go for your chubby, schlubby looksmatch instead.

>>10916966
yep, parasocial relationships are unhealthy.

>>10916958
You sound like my friend

>>10916966
>I'm an active member of her community and saviorpost when she's sad.
>i'm not fat at all, I think I'm a bit handsome but I could use a flat firm belly. Pls tell me hacks.
>It's true she has either chads or paypigs orbiting like any other woman that spends some time on the internet.
>We have similar interests in outdoors activities, sports, and things to do in the city. She's a ponyfag though but that isn't a dealbreaker more like a quirk of hers
>I wouldn't cold approach her, only if she was ok with meeting me
Now I want to wife her just coz you called me fat without any idea

>>10916958
I understand. I have/had this massive crush on this adorable cosplayer in her late 20's.
It started when I stumbled across her profile, I'm a content creator and saw she was in my area so I figured fuck it why not shoot my shot and ask for a collab, I even asked her on a date and she very politely turned me down.

We quickly became friends though, I shared her my pictures and she called me handsome, she even made me a custom fumo doll which I still sleep next to every day. Hell, I'm even on her private account.
Although I genuinely enjoyed talking to her, after a while, it became very clear to me that I would never be anything more than just a casual fan/friend of hers. I'm not in her close circle of friends, I'm not an active member in her community/chat, she would take hours or days to respond, she'd stonewall me when I wanted to ask for more personal details about her life etc.

I'm just one of the 50+ guys in her DM's (no seriously, she posted a story about how she got 50 dm's and will try to get back to all of them, lmao)

if I tried hard enough I could get into her close circle, but I'd rather not compete with like 5 other people for scraps of her attention, instead of obsessing/simping over her, my energy is just better spent on someone who can make more time for me.
I'm still friends with her, and I'll reach out to her when it's relevant, but I'm trying to just stop fawning over her, there was a period where I didn't talk/message her for over 3 months until she reached out, I'm proud of that.

My advice to you is that it's okay to be a fan and a part of her community if you enjoy that, but you should eventually move on from being in love with her, like with any female cosplayer/streamer online, you're basically competing with her mods, donators, the several dozen people in her inbox's AND her actual IRL social circle.

YES it is possible that as a fan you can eventually wife her, it does happen, but man, It's stiff fucking competition.

>>10917495
>saviorpost when she's sad
The kids call this "simping", I call this "being an emotional tampon free therapist".
>not fat at all... but "could use" a flat firm belly
So you're fat AND deluded, got it.
>she has either chads or paypigs orbiting
And you're her emotional tampon orbiter who's neither. You literally just whiteknight for her on the internet for free (and I bet you listen to her bitch about all her problems too, but she doesn't seem too interested in yours) thinking you're going to get pussy in return like a thousand other losers following her.
>we both like to drink water and breathe air, we were made for each other... oh her actual interests? Yeah I find those unpleasant and would ridicule her for them if she didn't have a pussy, but since she does they're... le quirky!
Jesus.
>I wouldn't dare approach milady without her consent
You're too far gone to save, now I'm just looking forward to the whiny woe-is-me greentext 5 years from now about how the mean Stacy used you like an ATM and you never saw it coming. This is beyond pathetic.
>>10917586
At least this one was man enough to actually ask the bitch out, he just made the mistake of sticking around after a no. Move on bro, begging for attention between 50+ other guys is just demeaning.

>be out drinking with a couple guys i met at a con
>one of them asks me if im single
>ofcourse.jpg
>introduces me to a chick he knows, (shes super cute) says "you're both weebs haha"
>little later, be a little drunk
>she comes back over
>hey anon so you watch anime :) ?
>for some reason (combination of alcohol and spaghetti) just say "nah never", take a drink and walk away
im actually going to kms myself

>>10917864
>just say "nah never", take a drink and walk away

>>10917864
Is it too late to call her up and ask if the offer's still open? If this was recent and you have her contact info, she might say yes.

>try to diet for 2 months
>lose 0 lbs
>try to increase exercise
>go on walk
>get assaulted by junkie
i ordered an exercise bike. i hate everyone

>>10918096
>go on walk
>get assaulted by junkie
where I live it's 50% chance of this and 50% chance of getting stopped every two houses to have an awkward long conversation with my endless elderly neighbors.

>>10911704
I feel ya. Usually stay at the Sheraton/Courtland Grand, but they fucked over their legacies this year. Had to settle on the Aloft. First year in nearly a decade that I'm not at a host hotel, but I'm grateful to have a hotel at all I guess.
Have you tried asking if anyone has space in the DragonCon rooms fb group?

>>10918104
I would heavily prefer being stopped by elderly people that want to talk over junkie bums that want to stab me (the "walkable cities" crowd completely ignores you can't have walkable cities if there's homeless tents everywhere)

>>10918215
maybe y'all should move out of commiefornia and get a cottage in Colorado i reckon

>>10913756
It's a different time old man, just take pride in the hard work you've put in for your outfit and your wife's

>>10914168
Gotta do your character dive, study the character and put on the mask and become them

Follow up to my post in the last thread, which was
>I've made a few posts both here and the other thread about how my con-going has stagnated. Not discouraged, just a lot of the same experiences or I'm less easily impressed anymore. After thinking about it, the answer's come to me, which is to host a party at an upcoming convention. I can't be sure I'll be the only one, but there definitely won't be many. It's time to step up the game.
Not only did it happen way sooner than expected (this last weekend) but I was right on the mark. Sometimes everything really does fall into place perfectly: everyone I thought I'd be rooming with bailed, got two other party people in last minute, a bunch of others I knew were down to join. And outside of somebody I didn't recognize passing out on my bed, we had no major issues. No undesirables made it in, noise complaints or alcohol poisoning. Feels good man. I should do this again some time

>>10918776
Yeah, hosting parties for the sake of the party and having fun is a lot better than trying have ulterior motives

I bought both the Himiko Toga basic cosplay bundle AND the more expensive accessories bundle off of Amazon, and wore them at a con recently.

I kept telling people that assumed I made the props by hand that it was all off Amazon and felt like such an imposter. Feels bad man, thanked em for the compliments but I feel like I don't deserve em

>>10918816
Hey, at least you got out there and if you want variation, you can start hand making stuff too.

>>10916072
Update: I guess I was too much of a sperg/autist/ugly and was unsuccessful in forming anything meaningful despite going all 3 days. I even cried after coming home on the friday/saturday days because I genuinely felt unwanted. Sunday was a lot better but I overslept and could only go for 2 hours before the convention ended|. Even the taxi driver back home was like "There's so many girls here, why can't you get a girlfriend?"

>Tfw thought I looked handsome in the mirror but I look like a hideous troll gremlin in photos and videos

At the end of the day it's 100% my fault, I take full responsibility for everything. Sorry to all the girls I had small talk with.

>>10918845
I think you should start cosplaying, that way people can talk about your cosplay too

>meet girl at a con
>click super well, get along great, we share stuff we like and comment on how similar we are
>she starts playfully touching me and I reciprocate
>eventually we're in a panel together literally lying on each other, holding hands, me reading my arm on her leg and rubbing it gently, both of us making innuendos and talking about more lewd stuff
>finally leave the panel, thought she wanted me to come with her back up to her hotel room, but for some inexplicable reason she splits off
>wait around for a bit in confusion and text her because I thought she wanted to be discreet or something but no response
>go back inside to a different panel, later on she texts back and comes over saying she wasn't even looking at her phone
>whatever, buy her a shot like I promised I would in the panel earlier and we both go in the dance
>hands on each other, pretty fun, but she seems a little avoident
>she seemed pretty drunk like me so whatever, keep asking if she's okay when it looks like she might not be sure on her feet or something
>she splits off again, I decide to dick around with another friend of mine in the dance
>come back later and see her hanging all over a bunch of other guys
>wat.jpg
>spend more time with my friend instead, dance still fun but whatever
>going back to her room again with another friend of hers she met like a day ago, another girl, she basically tells me to fuck off and doesn't even let me come up to chill in the room
>night over
I know this board is populated by women, so explain yourselves, what the fuck is this shit? Seriously? Why are you like this?
I essentially met with this girl and went on a date with her basically the whole day at the con, while she was sober mind you, I met her at the dance the previous night and we linked up again talking about literally everything and her and me just showing each other shit we both liked
And then it went nowhere, and I don't even understand what the fuck happened

>>10918849
also, for the record, I just texted her the next day saying I enjoyed spending time with her and I hope she gets home safe since she was leaving the next day, and I never even got a response
What the hell is the deal
What am I supposed to learn from this, that someone who's showing you their husbando the whole day and you showing her your waifu and you're both gushing over it is just a lying whore and every positive interaction I ever have with someone is not actually real? Why?

>>10918788
Well depending on what you mean by "ulterior motives", there may have been some of that too
>>10918837
The fastest fix viewing it as a compliment about how you pulled it off well. Cause on the flipside, if you didn't look good, they wouldn't have said anything

>>10918848
I did cosplay on two of the days, I actually got stopped for photos a few times on the last day which I was pretty happy about. It wasn't all bad.

>>10918849
>>10918850
I remember a year ago, I met this woman at a con and holy shit it was the most natural flowing conversation I had with someone IRL in a long time, we talked for about an hour straight non-stop with no awkward pauses or gaps in the conversation, it wasn't one sided at all and I felt like we clicked really well and the more our conversation kept flowing the more attractive she looked to me.

The same day though when I asked if she wanted to hang out later she just basically said that while she likes meeting and talking to people at conventions she prefers to leave it that way cause she's so busy and can't even make time for her own friends. Maybe I just wasn't interesting enough for her but oh well.

So yeah, as a man, my best guest is that some women like to meet and talk to new people at a convention but they only wanna leave it at the convention for whatever reason.

Don't take it personally, she found you attractive enough to touch you etc, that's a fat fucking W in my book.

>>10918980
I mean, I'll be honest, that's the first time I ever did anything like that with a girl
We are both literally autistic, I felt like I had found a unicorn, I just don't understand letting that go and not even saying anything
I'm really not one to judge because I'm far from some chaste gentleman but it did irk me how once we got to the dance she was breaking away so much, I suddenly felt out of place again and like the literal day we had spent together hadn't meant anything
I was really looking forward to just dancing with her the whole night but I also think I was making her other (probably dyke) friend buttmad since she had been all over me that day and she wanted to be possessive, cunt
maybe I just gotta bite the bullet and spend the dollars on my own hotel room so that I can push the issue instead of relying on someone else to hope they let me chill with them, but it's not like I'm going to a con just to try and woo girls
I really just hate it that I have so few opportunities, a con is like the only place I could find shut in autists like me but I guess my life isn't allowed to ever change or become good for more than a fleeting moment

I was WFH so during the coof I just focused on personal health and whatnot. I look way better now than I did when it started and get some attention from people now instead of just being ignored by everyone. I'm not much better at not being socially anxious though and am constantly afraid of saying something stupid or autistic or just generally annoying people that I still struggle to open conversations at cons or to maintain relationships even if I go get people who I met's contact info.

>>10916072
>I think the cosplayers are already getting stopped for photos and hounded for their instas all the time anyway, so it's pretty stiff competition if I just only approach the cosplayers.
When you have a DSLR they let you do it

>>10918849
>thought she wanted me to come with her back to her hotel room

You thought wrong. You can't assume she wants that unless she literally says she wants you to come up to her hotel room, or she tries to physically drag you there.

>why are you like this?

Women aren't a hivemind, I know that makes it more complicated. We also aren't responsible for the behaviour of other women. (This works both ways)
My best guess is she was interested in you and liked talking and flirting with you but she noticed you assumed you were going to do the vertical tango and she didn't like that.

It's also possible she chickened out, it's one thing to flirt with someone, it's quite another thing to sleep with a near stranger. It's risky behaviour. Even if she came there with the intention to get laid at the con she could have very well thought "wtf am I doing?" last minute.

Her being avoidant at the dance could fit within both scenarios.
At the very least we can assume she likes flirting with and talking to guys but we can't assume she wants it to go further.

>>10919006
>I also think I was making her other (probably dyke) friend buttmad

Yeah, she realized you were an asshole. Something in your behaviour put her off. Then she dances with you because she feels socially obligated to do so (very typical of autistic girls and women).

>>10919082
>she realized you were an asshole
okay retard

>>10919080
>You can't assume she wants that unless she literally says she wants you to come up to her hotel room
we both were making blatant innuendos the whole time while constantly touching each other, it could not have been more heavy of an implication
I really don't know how to emphasize that further
Plus this was after basically a whole day of us hanging out and clicking better than I've clicked with anyone before

And like I said, I saw her being all over literally everyone else once we got to the dance, like literally other guys and girls she hadn't even looked at before, meanwhile we had both told each other toward the end of the day we really liked each other and I had been trying to look out for her the whole day, like she had problems with loud noises and covered her ears a lot in the panel we went to and I constantly asked her if she was okay and if she wanted to leave but she kept saying she was fine and that I was great
It really feels like the whole afternoon was us both winding up a pitch but then she just let the ball fall to the ground at the last minute, I don't see how anyone could have assumed differently if they had gone through the same situation

>>10919089
>>10919080
also for the record, dead honest, I would've been fine with no sex if she wasn't comfortable, I honestly just wanted to snuggle up with her and spend time away from the con with her especially since she had the problems with noises, but she just didn't want me up in the room even to chill out with her, seemingly completely opposite to everything else she had said and done throughout the day

>>10919089
honestly the fact you seem to feel so entitled to her is probably it. you were probably too pushy or made her feel disrespected. next time a girl breaks off like that, don't chase.

>>10919093
>spend the entire day on a date
>said she was leaving the next day
>she initiated all the physical touching and blatant innuendos and literally saying I was her type
>constantly telling me I was great and that she really liked me when I kept asking her basically the whole day if she was okay whenever she looked even a little uncomfortable
I think I deserve to feel slighted when we end up going to the dance together after all that and she ends up just acting like a whore with other random people, and even then I didn't try to hardcore keep myself on her because at that point it seemed like she had really showed her hand and deflated my enthusiasm
this is legit a girl I would've asked out on a real date after the con, I'm not just trying to get in her pants, she's the one who gave me that impression and I don't know maybe she really is just a slut and was leading me on knowingly or not
I'm not one to judge or have expectations of purity at a fuckin anime con but effectively she did lead me on the whole day and I honestly feel like I did nothing wrong, I was accommodating and nice to her the whole day and if she had been upfront I would've been fine with whatever she was comfortable with
I don't know if I mentioned it but both me and this girl are literally autistic, I feel like I had found a unicorn honestly, I've never felt so comfortable talking to someone before

>>10919087
Nice comeback from an autist. The way you talked about her friend it's obvious you're an asshole. You also treat women as a hivemind, demanding we explain ourselves for the actions of another woman. You're not as nice and as good of a person as you think you are. Stop being a stubborn entitled fuckwad who asks for an explanation and then doesn't like when someone gives you an honest explanation.

Your biggest problem isn't your autism and all of the hurdles that come along with that, it's the fact that you don't even seem to like women, you're an asshole, you feel entitled to come to her room with her just because you think it was implied, and worst of all you do not want to listen when someone tells you you cannot assume things like this.
If you don't change you're going to get into trouble one day.

>>10919089
unless she actually said she wanted to go there or dragged you to her hotel room you cannot make assumptions. People misread the intentions of others very often, especially people with autism. You cannot rely on cues, suggestions, signs and implications even if they you think they are blatant. Just because she said she liked you doesn't mean she wants you to go to her room with her. You just met and barely know each other.
She literally told you to fuck off, that's as clear as it gets.

>I don't see how anyone could have assumed differently if they had gone through the same situation

older, wiser men than you know you can't just assume it will end with you going to her room.

>>10919094
>I think I deserve to feel slighted
no you don't, nothing was promised. She didn't owe you anything. You're just entitled.

>acting like a whore
yeah but you didn't think that when she was doing that with you. You're supposed to be rational, correct? Don't be surprised when someone who was willing to get handsy with someone they barely know at a con won't be willing to do it with other people. Do you really think you're so special that you can change someone who isn't willing to do that into someone who does?

>>10919095
her "friend" was also someone else she had just met, it's not like she was any more or less special than me, she was just jealous of me seemingly and she was really aggressively possessive of her but I guess it's okay to you because of what's between her legs? give me a break
>just because you think it was implied
we were blatantly talking about sexual stuff for hours while she kept letting me rub the inside of her leg, touching parts of it and her talking about how some it is tense or fat, her stretching suggestively and adjusting her bra right next to me with half my body on her and just letting me look, saying she wanted to go back to her room and "charge her phone" then I take mine out and go "you know, maybe I should do that myself" and she's like "yeah, you should"
or her literally bringing up shit like how her biggest fantasy is to just constantly pump out a guy's kids, unprompted, multiple times, and me having the same kink and basically approving her and she's just like "you're great, you're so great, I wouldn't be in this panel if I didn't like you a lot, this was really fun"
If you don't think it's not leading someone on to do all this crap and then cut them off and be a whore with random people in the dance then YOU are the asshole, and also even somehow more oblivious than a literal autistic like me

>>10919099
>but you didn't think that when she was doing that with you
because she was sober, and it was literal hours of lead up to it with her only initiating with really light touches after we had started to click and share stuff with each other, not just hanging off some random people's arms simultaneously that she just ran into when she got out of the bathroom and she's not walking super well after who knows how many drinks
like I said, I would've been fine with no sex, I just genuinely wanted to spend time with her alone and she hardcore gave the implication she wanted me to come up
like, it could not have been more blatant than all this shit and this wasn't even all of it
>>10919100

I'm not trying to change shit, she gave me both her number and discord and I just wanted to spend more time with her after she leaves, she even lives in the same city I do and told me that herself for Christ's sake
some of you people really have a fucking chip on your shoulder, you're getting on me for questioning "women" yet turning around and treating me like I'm just some random douchebag trying to pick up chicks at a con and not a terminal shut in who used this opportunity over the weekend to really try harder than I ever have in my life to be outgoing, nice, and make connections with people when I've never had the confidence to do it before and it's just made me miserable and lonely
This is why I only want to talk to other autistic people like her, you just don't fucking get it and think I'm lying or not being genuine because that's all normal people do, it's a bunch of stupid verbal games just hiding what you really mean and I'm so sick of trying to deal with it and getting treated like an alien by neurotypicals just because I want clear and honest communication. If I'm doing something you don't like? Just fucking tell me and I'll stop, I'm not a goddamn mind reader and you're not going to hurt my feelings if you're just blunt about whatever

>>10919101
just to add, what DOES hurt my feelings is being manipulated or ghosted, that shit is more fucked up than anything but it's all normal people seem to fucking do yet I'm treated like some kind of social pariah for telling someone I don't like or that's doing something shit that I don't like them or that they're doing something shit and I want them to stop or fuck off instead of playing this retarded social game that you're just "supposed" to understand

An anime convention used to be a place for people like me to find people like her, or at least what I thought she was, weirdos who like weird stuff and don't get out much but if we run into someone else like us by some miracle we end up clicking immediately. It's not just a girl thing either, it's the same with guys I've met at cons, they are some of the coolest dudes I've ever run into and they're weird in the same way I am and we never would have even met if it wasn't for the con.

Yet here I am, getting treated like some regular pickup douchebag because I dared to be upset that this girl I was genuinely into ended up leading me on and then just ghosting me
And again, dead ass serious, if she was more clear that she just wanted to maybe cuddle and whatnot but she really didn't want anything after the con I would've been totally cool with that as long as she told me straight up, the only thing she said to that effect was after we had spent literal hours all over each other and at that point I can't logically think anything except that she's trying to be coy
I was just happy to spend time with her and I wasn't even really mad in the moment I noticed she was breaking off or didn't invite me up to her room, I'm just depressed that I felt like I had found the perfect girl and maybe my life could've started to become a little more happy but I ended up just getting played

So no, in fact YOU are being the asshole here, hence my initial statement, women, why? Or maybe I should just say normal people. You suck

>>10919101
It's fine to feel hurt but her flirting with you and having a good time with you was not in any way a promise of sex or even continued connection, there is no reason that this would be assumed. You felt hurt because you are probably a lonely person, so making a connection like this is probably like having a hope dangled in front of you and then taken away. But to her and probably a lot of other people the interaction you had is actually very casual and would not have to mean anything beyond a nice experience that doesn't need to go further.

>>10919107
>But to her and probably a lot of other people the interaction you had is actually very casual and would not have to mean anything beyond a nice experience that doesn't need to go further
You see, I think this is kind of fucked up, but if it was clearly communicated to me from the start I would've been more accepting.
I don't know how to emphasize more that it wasn't like we just hooked up and were touching each other drunk and shit, we met the previous night, clicked real nice and actually exchanged multiple forms of contact, met up the next day both sober and clear headed, spent the majority of the day together on a literal date, and slowly escalating affection with HER initiating basically all of it and me reciprocating because I'm deathly afraid from overstepping boundaries like that in general, it's a huge source of my anxiety that makes it hard for me to connect with people and them not clearly communicating their wants is what I really struggle with dealing with and I think it's fucked up that the world works this way.

Like I already said, cons were supposed to be a place for people like me to meet other weirdos and make friends, there's countless stories I've heard from other less than normal people who got real relationships from going to cons and even some that have gotten married to people they met there

Honest to God, I feel like I did nothing wrong, and if I did and if this is just how the world works, where I can be the most accommodating and kind and outgoing version of myself I feel like I've ever been in my life and really try in a way I've always been too scared to do and it STILL leads to nothing and I end up even getting shunned for expecting something that's reasonable, why the fuck should I ever even care about leaving my house, trying to improve my life, trying to be nice and open with others, trying to do anything at all but exist because dying is too much of a hassle? Everything is just fucked, I'd rather keep to myself

>>10919107
Anyway that makes sense and I kind of already realized it, I just think it's really fucked up that's how the world works and that you're just expected to be okay with this
Like I said, I just want clear and consistent communication, hell her saying she was actually autistic (not just some faggot online getting attention oh I'm so quirky teehee) and me talking with her was honestly really eye opening for myself, I was relating to and agreeing with so much of what she was saying and how she thinks. I always thought I was probably some degree of autistic but I hate being a self diagnosing attention whore and because of abuse I've been gaslit my whole life into thinking I'm just lazy, or just weird, or "just an introvert" when in actuality I really enjoy talking with and being around people, I just struggle really fucking hard with someone who doesn't think like I do which is like 99% of people and I fucking hate it.
Talking with her and realizing yes, I am almost certainly in fact almost autistic is honestly a really big moment for me personally and it just makes me all the more upset that I ended up effectively being used, even if it was nice in the moment and I'm glad anything happened at all and proud of myself for trying so hard when normally I would be too scared to ever speak up like that.

It also makes me even more upset because where the hell am I supposed to find other autistic girls? Conventions, right? Well no, apparently everyone there is a normalfag who doesn't care and aren't looking for real connections either, I hate it. I hate it I hate it I hate it

>>10916072
Try getting into stuff other than vidya. Even pretty basic stuff like having a backyard garden or whatever gives you something interesting to talk about and a lot of people see any kind of DIY as magic

where can i find more women like them?

>>10919120
my bedroom

>>10919094
you literally just called her a whore and threw a tantrum because she didn't end up sleeping with you. yeah, i see why she backed out, and she honestly dodged a bullet.

>>10919118
I see your point and it's not a bad idea, but I'd rather not get into new hobbies just for the sake of making it a talking point/getting women, if I want to get into a hobby It should be because it's something I genuinely want to get into. Hence why vidya is one of my only hobbies.

I CAN actually talk to them, as a matter of fact there were 3 instances at this convention were I talked to women for a bit over 2+ hours, and tons of instances of making small talk etc, my problem is that I can't get it to transition into anything beyond that (for the most part anyway, like I said a few months ago I did end up meeting 2 people outside the con).

I can get their instagrams and even their discords or Wechat no problem, but anything beyond sending a "Hey it was nice meeting you!!" text is hard for me. Again I think my problem is that I almost approach exclusively cosplayers and I presume they already have TONS of guys in their dm's etc, I want to talk to the non-cosplayers more, which I did on Sunday but again cause I overslept I could only do it for so long before the con ended.

I suppose it's just a skill I need to keep working on.

>>10919182
>conveniently ignores the part where she's hanging off multiple guys she just met coming out of the bathroom
yep, it's a femoid post

>>10919186
girls can sniff that out btw, if you're genuinely interested in joining a female-dominated hobby vs if you're just there to try to date

>>10919186
>Wechat
yo wtf you're going to cons in China?

>>10919199
Oh yeah I also agree with that which is another reason why I won't get into new hobbies for the sake of socialization/women. One person even suggested I go back to college for it which I obviously strongly am against. Not saying I'm a saint when it comes to this stuff but I gotta at least TRY to be honest and joining a new hobby JUST for the sake of women seems a bit too far

>>10919200
A long time ago a Chinese woman I used to talk to a lot helped me set one up. I still miss her...

>>10916072
women are kinda retarded, don't worry too much over it

>>10919094
You'd save yourself time, money, and heartache if you just took the money you spent on a con that you failed to hookup at on an escort instead.

Do moids really?

>>10919114
>>10919006
Don't let it discourage you, like I said she at least found you decent looking enough to lay down with you and touch you etc. This was just ONE girl out of many that you could form a potential connection with at a convention. The key takeaway from this is that now you know you at least have potential. There could've been a billion reasons why she brushed you off, just assume it's not personal. It's fine to be bummed out by the while thing, I know I certainly would feel slighted if the same thing happened to me, you're allowed to be sad about it for a while but just don't let it change your entire mindset about women or conventions etc.

Sometimes the woman you talk to all day will brush you off the following day, sometimes the woman you talk to for 10 minutes becomes your friend for the next 3 months. No one on this earth can possibly know what each road with a person will eventually lead to.

Basically just instead of thinking "Ahh man she totally brushed me off what a bitch/whore I'm never going to a convention again" (just exaggerating here) just think "Well now I know I got potential and even if this didn't lead to anything I still had fun hanging out with her". Basically it's fine to be bummed out for a bit but if you don't' change your outlook in these situations it's not gonna help in the future.

>>10919237
Us guys do not want hookups, we want relationships, there's a big difference, although if hooking up on day one is part of that relationship, then it's fine. Hence why he said he was fine he didn't end up hooking up with her cause it's not his intention at the start. But there's no point in sex if it's just a purely transactional thing, like a hooker. It's like using a cheat code to beat a level, there's no point. Although I am a virgin so take that what you will.

>>10919114
it can be a catch 22 if you are lonely and desperate for connection, but genuine connections form more easily when your wellbeing isn't relying on that one connection forming. I'm sure you had a great and meaningful time with that girl but you were placing heavy expectations on someone you just met to turn your whole life around. That's almost always going to lead to disappointment

>>10919242
I'm upset because that con is literally the only 3 days out of the year I've had for the past decade to leave my fucking house and go to a place where women even are and attempt to talk to them, and on top of that it's con girls, aka other shut ins and weirdos that I can actually figure out how to approach because God forbid a woman ever approach a man in this "patriarchal" society
I'm upset because I really got along with her in a way I haven't with literally anyone else I ever met before, and that was just in one day, and she even said she lived close to where I did
but then just *poof* and back to my fucking shithole home with my abusive parents that I'm trapped in because I have no one to help me and I'm incapable of doing anything productive in this fucking hellhole and I can't even enjoy the post con day home and reflect and talk about things because they're fucking yelling at each other as soon as I open the door and there's cat shit all over the house because they're too good to clean the litterbox while I'm away
I am not into being treated like something that gets thrown away, it pisses me off really, really bad

>>10919245
literally all I was expecting was for her to message me after the con sometime
even just an acknowledgement, I mean why the fuck did she give me both her number and discord at all in that case? It makes literally no logical or illogical sense

>>10919270
I understand it hurts but that's part of the deal, at the end of the day it's ultimately your responsibility to buSild these connections.

I went to a con recently and unfortunately, I didn't get much success in being able to talk to people. It felt more transient this time compared to previous cons I've been to.

It really bums me out because in the previous cons that I went to, I did encounter people who seemed to be willing to chat, but I sorta dodged the opportunity because I was looking for as many photos of/with cosplayers as I could. Tbf though, I definitely should start cosplaying, I think.

>>10916917
>real life 4chan threads
so that's the appeal of panels?

>https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=6IJCFc_qkHw

>>10919375
yeah exactly which is why panels are lame af if the host is an sjw

>>10919270
Stop hinging your happiness on a (potential) relationship. It's never a good idea.
Maintain a good social life with multiple close friends so you don't put all of your social needs onto 1 person.
If you don't have a social circle like that then that's what you should be working on first. Trying to get a relationship when you're unable to make and keep friendships is a recipe for disaster. You will be putting all of your social and emotional needs on 1 person and that's just too much. Then there's also the reasons why you don't have friends, I don't know what those reasons are but those same reasons might be the downfall of any relationship you even get into. Dating before you even have friends is like moving from level one straight to level 5 and missing vital information from level 2 to 4.

Also don't just be nice to people only when you get something out of it. That would make you the Nice Guy stereotype.
Being miserable is not an excuse.

If you don't like people you're not going to like your partner if she doesn't agree with you on something. Don't expect that a relationship will be your ticket out of your parent's house. You should go live on your own. If you don't have an income because your mental illness(es) prevent you from having a job then get treatment, and also look into disability assistance. It might be enough money for you to live alone somewhere. If it's not enough for that then it might still be enough to live with a friend.

>>10919386
Good advice right here desu. How do I make a social circle though?

>>10919389
After college? Not a sausagefest? No drugs? Yeah, it's the blind leading the blind out there.

>>10919389
Depends on your age and if you're studying, working or a NEET.

>>10919401
speak for yourself. I'm in my 30s and I have 3 really close friends I talk to and see on a regular basis. I met one of them online in 2015. The other 2 I met in HS. I have other (not as close) friendships I could invest more time into if I wanted those connections to be closer but I simply do not have the time.

>>10919401
>Not a sausagefest

there's nothing wrong with a guy who only has guy friends. You don't need a female friend. And I don't recommend getting into a friendship with a girl/woman if you even have a tiny bit of hope it might grow into something else. Only be friends with a girl/woman if you actually want to for the sake of friendship (no ulterior motives) and you're sure you're not into each other.

>>10919386
The whole point for me is that I don't leave the house and even get the chance to talk to people except literally a few days out of the year so that's my only opportunity to try and make friends or meet people in general
Even if I could get out more I don't know where else I would go, I guarantee there's no way I could find anyone I would be able to approach or click with like at a con

>>10919415
What's keeping you inside the house if I may ask?
If you're waiting to make friends at the con (is that like once a year?) then it might not happen for a few years. I have talked to people at the con who I really clicked with, who gave me their contact info, we then started chatting online but it never eventually grew into an irl friendship.

Even if you made a friend at the con you would have to be willing to get out of the house to see that friend at least some of the time.

It's true that you don't typically become friends with random people you meet outside. If you click with the people at the con you can also try to find people (hopefully near you) who have the same interests outside of the con. Go visit a local comic book store/manga store. My local comic book store hosts monthly events such as card tournaments. This may sound weird but there are some people who just hang out at the store for most of the day if they have free time, even if they don't buy anything. These people usually form some kind of group and they go to the movies together or start playing D&D.

Some cities have manga/anime associations. Sometimes those are tied to universities but all the ones I have seen so far were also open to outsiders and had no maximum age requirements. There are probably fewer of these around than there used to be because anime is easily available now, but there are some that still active.

Nerds are everywhere these days. Just last night I went to an acquaintance's home for the first time to help her fix a dress. I knew she was married, but I had never seen the guy and she never mentioned his interests. I saw anime posters and game merch (he had a huge zelda sword) everywhere in their living room and home office. I said "an anime fan lives here" and her husband shouts "that would be me" from the living room. She said "I'm not interested in that kind of stuff" and shrugged.

>>10919415
same anon as >>10919422
You can also go the online route. Go visit websites/forums/groups about the topics you're interested in. Most forums are dead these days but you might be able to find an active one. Do not use CGL to find friends, it's full of mentally ill assholes like us.

Then just talk to people there about your topics. Word of warning; do not share too much about your private life, do not share info about your problems. Keep it light and positive. Once you make an irl friend you're safe to share that kind of stuff.

Establish yourself in that group, then once most people have seen you around online and you're no longer a complete stranger you can offer to host a hangout in your city. That's when you find out if there are locals. You would need to find some kind of activity to do, or just keep it simple and have some drinks and some snacks at a cafe or bar. Warning; these things cost money.

I hope you don't live in buttfuck kansas with nothing but wheat fields as far as the eye can see.

>>10919422
>>10919424
>I hope you don't live in buttfuck kansas with nothing but wheat fields as far as the eye can see
I would prefer that, I live in a gay suburb and I don't drive, so I basically cannot go anywhere or do anything
only reason I even get out to a con every year is because it's close to me and I know people who go every year that I can catch a ride with
I feel extremely isolated and my home life is anything but good so it just makes it all even worse, I feel trapped

>>10919425
how far is the nearest city center?

>>10919425
>live in a gay suburb and I don't drive
This is America. Get a car.

>>10919427
I've been trying for over 10 years but the mental hurdle of being judged by a stranger in a car for something teenagers know how to do is too much for me to handle, and I don't have any kind of emotional support to help ease me into it
In fact much the opposite, living here is so terrible I can barely get myself to do anything at all
>>10919426
I don't even know, multiple miles? Only way I can get around is biking (which is a death wish around here, and I also get yelled at when I say I'm going to do that) or Uber which gets really expensive fast

>>10919429
>for something teenagers know how to do is too much for me to handle

the longer you put this off the worse it will get.
You can't really do anything without a car if you live in suburbia and there's no city center close enough to walk/safely bike. I'm going to assume there is also no public transportation within walking distance.

>>10919432
you would be correct on all those
I've basically been a hikikomori for almost 10 years
I just don't have an environment I can be productive in or any help to make me comfortable so I don't know what to do
And I mean like, how am I supposed to get a license and car without a job? how am I supposed to get a job without a license or car? I fucking hate it here

>>10919429
You're unemployed and lives with your parents, aren't you?

>>10919434

>>10919435
A place where people work in tech and inflate their $80k gross to $120k

>>10919433
Apply for disability assistance, depending on where you are it might be enough to live independently in a (shoebox) apartment in the city. They're probably going to require that you get treatment if you do get disability assistance, and they might also fund that.

>>10919434
wasn't that obvious? If he had an income he would have moved out ages ago.

>lock my bike with 2 chains and a u-lock at the event building
>come back to it after the event
>chains covered in scratches/cuts but still holding
>wheel spokes are all smashed and cut
...

>>10919439
I think I'm considered too "high functioning" to get any disability
doesn't that also depend on how much money you have saved up?

>>10919443
>I think

meaning you haven't even tried yet. If you don't have a diagnosis that's what you should get first, that tends to open a lot of doors. Can't get disability assistance without a diagnosis.

And how do you have any savings if you haven't worked for 10 years?
Did you ever have a job?

https://www.aarp.org/retirement/social-security/questions-answers/savings-account-impact-on-ssi-or-ssdi.html

https://protectedtomorrows.com/services/family-community/expert-q-a/questions-answers/will-the-money-in-my-savings-account-prevent-me-from-qualifying-for-government-benefits/

https://www.jeffreyfreedman.com/savings-limits-and-social-security-disability/

short answer; it depends

I also saw a wait list of 5 months, so if you want to get out you better do something soon.

I didn’t do the cosplay I brought because I realized its really very half-assed. I need to take cosplay accuracy more seriously or I’m no different from any of the other tiktok zoomers. This probably also means working out until twunkmode and learning how to do makeup, both of which are fucking hard for me but I have to do it. I only get a few more years where I can still cosplay.

>mfw I turn 27 this year and majority of people at cons are like 16-17 years old

They are cool, but the 10 years age difference makes me feel weird. Especially since I started all this con shit only last year.

>>10919376
This shit makes it feel terrible to buy anything at cons these days. Ordered a VN for $45, including shipping, and saw it a week later at a con for $90.

>>10919458
>>10919461
yeah I get the feeling of feeling like you're too old for this shit, it really sucks honestly. if i could i would instantly turn the clock back 10-15 years and redo my teenage years all over again. and I'm considering going full goth to my next con because I need to learn makeup too, what male characters are there that fit that?
>>10919462
never buy anything at cons it's all sold at scalper prices, buying shit straight from Japan is always way cheaper

>>10919478
It's a fun excuse to take photos, day drink, and talk to strangers about nerd stuff. Often get in some RPG sessions too.

Fuck the overpriced Etsy shit, however.

Any type of cosplay group is entirely trash, the real thing is to be 100% alone. Take pics and etc but arrive and leave alone, always.

>>10919553
t. no friends

>>10919574
and? what's the problem?

>>10919575
Having no friends has been proven to be very bad for your mental health. You're basically isolating yourself. Humans aren't meant to be lone wolves. It's not cool like in the movies, irl it's pathetic.

>>10919478
>never buy anything at cons it's all sold at scalper prices, buying shit straight from Japan is always way cheaper
Depends, some distribution companies like discotek sell around what their own website price+shipping is, some manga sellers still do bulk deals that are competitive, figures it is always fucked with tiny exceptions unless it is gunpla where the prices match most retailer prices(whick is like 10%-15% higher than online retailers for model kits) and occasionally there are places with niche items barely anyone carries. Things are only slightly worse than what I saw around 6 years ago, figures and anime are grossly overpriced now.
Artist alleys any more also are boardeline scam too now, I have seen way too much stolen and AI art going for more than $20 for poster paper.

>>10913892
I love how mezzo piano has become the punching bag on cgl when it’s relatively unpopular compared to most fetishes. The only people who wear mezzo piano for fetish purposes are Japanese women who are porn stars and a small demographic on TikTok (usually ages 15 - 20). I’m not denying that people are into that stuff and I have seen it in person, but the worst fetishists are grown men who can’t wear those sizes.

>>10919649
setting up an artist booth seems so easy when you can just sell stolen art and pride merch and make money off dumb people

>>10919186
Speaking of insta

>Meet two qt cosplayers at a con, had a nice conversation with them, one of them gives me candy
>Get both of their instagrams and message them that it was nice meeting them
>One of them actually messages back (the one who gave me candy)
>Her responses are lengthy and not dry at all
>She responds decently fast as well
>We're get to know each other a bit more and even make small plans about meeting each other again at the next con
>We end up talking for 2 hours before she goes to sleep
>Next day comes
>No response

Well damn, it was fun while it lasted, no hate towards her or anything, I'm just disappointed cause we both really did seem to enjoy talking to each other

>>10919478
I mean it kinda depends on what you're getting. I don't feel bad paying $15 for a Touhou doujin CD cause even with the markup it's not that expensive. Same with artist alley, a lot of the better artists will actually market themselves on Twitter with their booth number.
Shout-out to the chick selling Fate stickers, didn't expect to see characters from stuff that wasn't translated into English yet so that was cool.

>>10919461
Try being 38 like me. I've been doing the con thing since I was 15 though.

>>10919727
do you mean that she left you on read?

>>10919461
>majority of people at cons are like 16-17 years old
I'm gonna go on a limb here and say this is EXTREMELY unlikely unless you're either going to little local cons only or in a country where that's the norm

>>10919739
Nah, she hasn't read my last message yet, so I guess she left me on delivered, not read.

>>10918816
At least you were honest

>>10913831
She should do it
I don't think it will prevent child-rape either (at least not to 100%), but still better they goon of to her, than to a real child, or worser...

>>10919553
Not finding your group during the convention?

>be me
>make plans to go to a con with a friend a month away
>we hang out a week after making plans and I ask him to choose a theme for my coord
>we hang out again a week later to watch anime
>before he leaves he says he's excited to see what I'd wear for the con next week
I love this man so much

>>10920214
you two should date already

>>10918980
as a woman i'm exactly like this. i enjoy meeting and talking to new people and making spontaneous connections at cons, but i tend to not keep up those connections because A. my social battery dies quickly and abruptly and B. due to my assburgers i am scared shitless of genuine deep connection and long term friendships.

of course there's also C.: many male autists (and men in general) consider close personal friendships with women to be a waste of time if they don't end in romantic and/or sexual relations. and it's really fucking off putting to me when it's made blatantly obvious during a conversation. though it seems like a different situation re: >>10918849. sorry that happened anon.

>>10920305
I'm conflicted on this, obviously you are free to talk to whoever you want at a con and you don't owe them anything, but it does feel like a waste to hear you basically throw all those connections away.

I imagine there were tons of people who were excited to talk to you after the con only for you to brush them off and leave them feeling sad.

>>10920323
Nayrt, but if she did not give her contact info then why would anyone have the expectation to interact post con?
And if she did give her contact info people should still not expect this to be more than casual/surface level interaction post con. The disappointment is due to unrealistic expectations in these scenarios.

I met a guy at a con workshop, we had a great time and exchanged contact info. We looked each other up on fb and became fb friends. He hasn't said more than 4 sentences to me in 5 years, so I just assumed he wasn't interested beyond extremely sparse and casual interaction. This didn't make me sad or disappointed because I never had any expectations anyway. I matched his level of interaction. If he wanted more than that he would have made that clear by interacting more. He had all the opportunity and time in the world to do so. When I cleaned up my friends list last year I also unfriended his account.

>>10920325
Oh don't worry I meant in the context of exchanging contact info, obviously if she didn't exchange contacts with anyone then there's no problem

>>10920323
ayrt, i do give out my instagram if asked for it with a verbal caveat that i am terrible at answering DMs and may not respond. i don't give out my discord or my number or any form of social media designed solely for messaging. also, as i attend a lot of local cons and make a point to attend the same cons year after year, i often run into the same people i've met before and catch up with them then. i find DMs and online messaging to be very stale in comparison to real life interactions. trying to keep a convo going via text makes me want to off myself, but it flows much smoother in person.

you're right that i probably shouldn't give out contact info at all, and i likely need to be more up front that i have little intention of keeping regular communication post con. i typically just go with my "i don't answer DMs" schtick, but i'm not sure everyone gets the message. it's really just that i don't want to hurt anyone's feelings or give the impression that i didn't find them interesting, when i really did have a great time talking to them. i'm the problem, not them, and i want them to know that; refusing to give out social media can seem like a blatant rejection, and i'm happy to rekindle those connections at future events. but i'm probably overthinking it.

>>10919080
You assumed too much brother. If she was autistic, which anime con... real possibility, believe me when I say what you think is heavy innuendo isn't. It's just bullshitting. You're reading into it far too much because an autistic person doesn't read into any of those actions at all. All of those actions and words are presented at face value for them. I know it's hard to wrap your head around but it's true. I know positive consent is clunky and has the potential to kill the mood but it's literally the only way to actually know if there is real intention or consent. I unfortunately know this from experience. I got to the point of literally making out with a girl before it clicked in her head my intentions were romantic. I thought everything said before that point was clear but it wasn't on her end. Her autism didn't connect the dots of all the lewd talk we were having until literally that point. So especially with anime con my policy is to be more blunt then I would be in everyday life because of the high degree of mental illness at cons. You kind of have the match of wave length of your fellow attendees here.

>>10919461
For starters that's cap. I don't know why people keep on trying to pretend like cons are overrun with children on school trips. You're just feeling internally self conscious for engaging in what is admittedly childish behavior. (Kill the cringe in your heart)

Secondly it's perfectly fine to interact with younger people on the con floor as long as it is in an appropriate way. They are still people. Just don't be weird. And yes getting panicked that you're talking to a minor in any capacity is weird. You shouldn't feel weird for just shooting the shit with someone on the con floor if you have no intentions beyond that. Don't invite them to your room party but there is no good reason to just flat out avoid talk anyone younger than you. That's weird.

>>10920341
>>10920325
>>10920305
Like I said, we literally both said we liked each other a lot, she gave me multiple forms of contact (number and discord) and she was the one who started making innuendos and initiating all the physical contact
I really don't know what else I'm supposed to think

>>10920343
she changed her mind. simple as.

>>10920347
>changes mind on a dime
>doesn't communicate at all
why even talk to anyone ever

>>10920343
okay, she led you on. that's shitty and i'm sorry that happened. you've sent your 10-odd vent messages out to anons on 4chan for catharsis - now it's time to recuperate and move on. dropped connections and disappointment happen in social situations, and all you can do is pick your head up, go to the next con, and try again.

it sounds like this girl just got cold feet. it doesn't really matter what the reason was, but no, not everyone will be like that. as >>10918980 said, take it as a win that she hung out and flirted with you for hours. that means that you're attractive and interesting and sociable enough for women to want to spend time with you; this one interaction ending poorly doesn't negate that. put yourself out there, and try not to overreact to rejection or disappointment. i know it's hard to grasp this for us autists after a lifetime of social exclusion, but forming relationships is often one of those "journey not destination" things. when you finally find the one, you'll be able to look back at all the cool people you met and fun times you had over the years, even if those connections were just a brief whirlwind of a night.

>>10920350
The thing is I'm fine with flings or whatever, as long as its clearly established or communicated to me
I think ghosting or leading people on is genuinely evil, and at a con I'm looking for actual friends since it's one of the very few times I'm out of the house, and even fewer times I feel like I have a chance to actually interact with people I might be able to make real friendships with

>>10920351
>I think ghosting or leading people on is genuinely evil
again, sorry that happened. it's frustrating to be ghosted, but you aren't entitled to anyone's time, and lack of communication is shitty but is not a crime. besides, think about how much time you've wasted seething over this girl. if she acts like this, is she really worth your attention? would you really have wanted an ongoing relationship with someone who can't communicate?

i know this sounds like hippie bullshit but there really is truth to the idea that you get back the energy you put out into the world. the more you internalize these situations, the more negative you will feel about socializing in general, and that doomer mindset unfortunately tends to seep into interactions. again, not everyone is like this. take a breath, hype yourself up, and remember that if you made it all the way to the end of the night with her before she ghosted, that means you're good company! take it in stride and move onto the next one.

>>10920352
My problem is I really don't have anything else
Hell the night I got home from the con my parents were screaming at each other as soon as I walked in the door and there was cat shit all over the floor because no one had cleaned the litter box while I was gone and it was such a whiplash from a great weekend where I thought maybe I could've turned things around back into my hellhole routine that I just spent all night crying in my room
That con is literally one of my only opportunities to escape

>>10920353
i understand, anon. i really do. i've been there too - in fact, i'm in a similar living situation to you as well.

i know exactly how it feels to have no one and crave that connection. but it's dangerous to put all your desires for escape onto one stranger. friendship is wonderful, but setting your expectations so high right off the bat is exactly why you felt the weekend was ruined. you had fun. you talked to people. you got to sperg out over anime. all of these little moments will make it worth it in time. the more you learn to take the good with the bad, the better you will feel about life, even when things get really fucking dark.

did you talk to the girl about your home life or mental health struggles? if so, it's possible that she too was looking for an escape from negativity that weekend, and didn't feel well equipped to take on the emotional weight of your problems. she also may have seen that you're struggling, and assumed it would hurt you less to leave without outright rejection to your face, as it seems like you face a lot of rejection and strife in your life and she didn't want to do that to you too. just speculating here, and i agree that she should have communicated directly. but i don't think she necessarily had bad intentions. regardless, it still hurts, and i get that. it sucks, but you're both human, and these things happen.

>>10920355
No I never talk about that kind of stuff with anyone, like I said my problem is just the lack of clear communication
Which is really what I'm hung up over, because she was autistic too, and we talked about that sort of thing and I felt like she actually understood me and my problems with that sort of thing
Then it turns out she was just slutty and getting touchy feely with random people regardless
I don't know where else I'm even supposed to find other opportunities to try communicating with people like me, and even if I did I'm pretty much trapped where I live regardless so I can't even get myself out there
I've basically been abandoned without a word by everyone I ever considered a real "friend" so at this point I'm really fucking over it

>>10920357
>we talked about that sort of thing and I felt like she actually understood me and my problems
i'm sorry anon but this is exactly what i'm getting at. i had to unlearn the behavior of bringing up "wahhhh muh autism" every time i got into a conversation with a potential new friend, and it seriously did wonders for my ability to make lasting connections, even with fellow autists.

consider that she may have related to your struggles, but not wanted to talk about how shitty it is to go through life with autism and being unable to keep friends. as i said, she may not have felt well equipped to take on that emotional weight, and wanted an escape from that negativity herself. autism and its struggles are overwhelmingly negative. for me, even when i can relate, there is nothing that kills a fun and positive vibe faster than "boohoo i'm a friendless sperg".

it's also possible that you may have been unconsciously projecting your desires for escape onto her, and she couldn't handle that pressure. if she picked up on your feelings re: wanting this con and a new connection to turn your entire life around and fix your hellhole routine, that's probably why she thought it would be better to duck out rather than to loudly reject you to your face.

i'll leave it at this because i don't think i'm really breaking through here, but seriously, you attract the energy you put out. if you go to cons moping over how you can't make friends, you will struggle to make friends. i know it's hard, but keep your mindset as positive as possible. again, have confidence. she clearly enjoyed your company and other people will too. i wish you luck and all the best.

>>10920360
You're misunderstanding, she's the one who brought up being autistic and then I used that as an opportunity to talk with her about it and such, just how she and I think, not anything about how much I'm suffering
You're projecting all this shit onto me that I literally did not do, I just reciprocated what she was saying and doing and spent a day connecting with her and then she leaves me out to dry for no logical reason
It's honestly really fucking irritating that just because I'm male I'm assumed to either be some creepy rapist or moping sperg when I am exhaustively explaining that's not what I was doing at fucking all, if anything it's all the women I ever talked to that literally cannot shut up about their mental illness or whatever bullshit that they base their whole personality around because I guess airing your dirty laundry to someone you just met (which is laughable compared to what I put up with 90% of the time) is what every stupid ass person does these days

>go to con
>meet girl there by herself
>hit it off, get along alright and get a contact
>talk to her a decent amount after the con, we both end up liking a lot of the same stuff
>out of nowhere weeks later she says oh I was just visiting my BF today :))))
I'm never talking to a woman again

>>10920361
okay. i misunderstood. apologies - i didn't realize she brought it up. i was just speculating to try to help get to the source of the issue, as the nature of autism is that we don't always realize how we come off.

i'll direct you back to >>10920352 then. it happened. you can seethe over some random girl, or you can realize that you deserve better than her and she wasn't worth it anyways. the best thing you can do is shake it off and try not to base your enjoyment of the entire weekend on one person you just met. keep at it, build confidence, and you will meet other friends who will value you and your time.

>>10920363
I'm not even angry about it, I'm just flabbergasted that you can do basically everything right and still nothing happens
I did the whole shebang, left my house, had a great time, talked with more people and was more social than I think I've ever been in my entire life
and all I got was a fleeting few days and then I'm back into hell with nothing different and I might as well have done nothing at all
that's how every good thing in my life is: temporary
no matter how I much I try in anything nothing ever changes and I'm just back to being miserable
I can't wait until my parents finally die and something will actually change, but of course it'll just be the government evicting me from the home I've lived in my entire life instead of my parents abusing me and dragging me down
I'm just so tired of trying for nothing

>>10920348
You've been acting like a psycho and spamming the board for days now, so I'm not convinced she didn't pick up on this and decide you were too crazy to keep up with. You should get treatment for BPD.

>>10920338
AYRT and honestly as someone who's been on the other end it's comforting to know that it's most likely not something I did wrong. Honestly you don't need to change much I think something like "I don't answer DM's" sends a clear enough message anyways.

>>10920390
you should stop being a retarded woman

>>10920338
>>10920391
if you're not willing to actually message someone there's no reason to give your contact info
just be direct and tell them that, if you give someone a way to talk to you they're going to assume you'll want to talk

>>10920362
>I'm not even angry about it, I'm just flabbergasted that you can do basically everything right and still nothing happens
That's how life works lol, you can do everything right and still get fucked, but eventually you gotta pick yourself up and move on

>>10920401
I think women are scared of confrontation/retaliation if they refuse to give contract info so I kinda understand giving it

>super excited to try on a new cosplay I've been waiting for and its finally here
>get deflated so fast seeing how terrible it looks on me

being ugly really fucking sucks

>>10920403
>I think women are scared of confrontation/retaliation if they refuse to give contract info so I kinda understand giving it
that's fucking dumb, don't play games with people if you don't want to talk to them
if you're that scared of telling someone no you shouldn't be leaving the house in the first place, or you should be carrying a gun

>>10920403
meant for
>>10920364
lmao

>>10920406
Don't you think your hostile reaction is exactly why they would prefer to let a guy down easy instead of being direct?

>>10920404
Have this be the inspiration for you to lose weight

>>10920409
>why are you being hostile about me lying to your face and playing retarded games with you because I'm too much of a pussy to just say "no thanks"
gee I don't know
why are you actively contributing to men thinking all women are fucking retarded and not worth interacting with?

>>10920409
anon is unhinged, there's no way that girl didn't notice. All his friends abandoned him which means he's the common denominator.

>>10920421
women were a mistake

>>10920413
Its not a weight issue, its a body structure thing. I'm like 122 lbs

>>10920423
once again proving my point. Well done. You make it too easy.

>>10920426
>I don't want to talk to this person
>oh I know, I'll give him my phone number and hope he'll take the hint when I ghost him, that makes sense

>>10920425
Nayrt, get fit and healthy then.

>>10910764
Yeah bro, sportsball yesterday was great! The Rockville Raptors totally kicked the Ogden Peacocks' ass! That pigskin got slammed so hard onto the goal bro!

>>10920362
she probably didn't have one at the time and got one in between you meeting her and getting that text, normie women go like 2 weeks max without being in a relationship. that or she's just making that up so you don't get any ideas

>>10920489
he lives 2 hours away from her
I don't know what to think

Ok so I went to a convention for the first time ever (by myself because I have nobody to go with), and I had so much fun and talked to dozens of people (from a few words to hanging out with them for a few hours), asked for photos, got my photo taken a few times, got invited and went to an afterparty, here's the thing. actually messaging the people I met feels like I'm talking to an AI bot or some shit, it's like they actively don't want to talk to me (and I've been left on read by a lot of them), it doesn't help literally nobody I met is anywhere near where I live. what the fuck do normies even talk about with each other then, or do they even talk at all?

>>10920490
she's probably an edater and that's her Discord boyfriend. I feel all women should have some form of TAKEN/their boyfriend's @ in their bios so nobody gets any false hope or tries to flirt with them

>>10920491
I completely forgot to include my main point with this, this isn't a new phenomenon, It's been like this my entire life where I'm the one holding up one sided conversations, I'm the one organizing stuff, I'm the one getting myself invited to stuff because nobody texted me first, if I stop talking to someone they never message me how I'm doing and the "friendship" just dies. again, I can talk and act mostly fine in person (I'm just kind of autistic and awkward) it's just through text where everything turns one sided as hell

>>10920442
Oh man, Jim, I tell you what. Did you hear about that crazy weather we're suppose to be having this weekend? The wife even promised to let me go out fishing. It better not put a...*lightly pokes shoulder with fist* DAMPER on my plans! *Hearty guffaws all around*

>>10920442
>>10920498
whatever problems I have with the cosplay community vanish whenever I think about how this is what the average person is like

>>10920413
not them but in a similar position. not fat, even have abs and a round ass. just ugly. considering getting plastic surgery but its so fucking expensive and risky

>>10920362
>Go to con and attend a photoshoot
>See a cute cosplayer by herself
>Briefly talk to her and get her contact
>Say it was nice meeting her, think nothing of it
>She gives a decently lengthened reply
>Might as well keep chatting with her tomorrow
>Talk to her for a bit the next day
>"Thank you, I'll see if I can ask my husband to help me with that"
>I simply heart react to the message and stop talking to her

It happens man, don't worry, again I'm gonna echo what I said before, she thought you were decent enough to want to hang out with her so just take that from it.

But yeah I do know how you feel, I wish women who are married or in relationships would go to the conventions with their partner. Personally if I see a cosplay couple, I'm complimenting the dude only and making the woman take the photo for me with him, cause I have bro-code.

>>10920511
I just like don't wanna talk to her anymore
what's the point of trying to make connections anywhere

>>10920513
If you want a girlfriend, then it's worth it to make connections with women, even the ones that are not single, because they can refer you to their single friends. Kinda like how having connections can make landing a job a lot easier. Come to think of it, finding a girlfriend is a lot like finding a job, lmao.

If you don't want one, then just stick with having guy friends, personally I have never been left on read by my fellow men and I can always depend on them. As a man it is genuinely so much better and easier to make connections with guys, I feel like if I wanted to I could easily form long term connections with them in a single day no problem if my friendship capacity wasn't damn near at its limit already.

>>10920516
>I have never been left on read by my fellow men
I have been, the only men who actually bother to talk to me and message me are my online friends ...

>>10920518
Ah don't worry about it, i'm introverted and I work from home, 95% of my friends are online too, nothing wrong with having close online friends, you can even arrange to meet up with them eventually if you're close enough, bonus points if they're actually in the same area as you cause then you can just transition into an IRL friends from there.

>>10920520
how do I turn people I met at cons into friends? most of my online friends I met literally years ago and things just happened naturally, it feels completely different when I'm basically trying to force it and the person already knows what I look like and saw me in person (I haven't had any luck in meeting people at cons who are from my city and it's literally in the top 20 US cities by population. most of my online friends are either on the opposite sides of America or in other countries

>>10920521
In my experience guys at cons are WAAAAAAAY more open to being talked to, they don't have their guard up like women do (not blaming women, I understand why they do what they do).

Basically just find someone who's by themselves and looks cool to you (And believe me, finding men who cosplay but are alone at a con isn't a hard thing to do), if they're in cosplay then you can very easily start a conversation by asking them about their cosplay such as what it's from, if they like the show/video game they're cosplaying etc etc. If they're not in cosplay you can still approach them by asking them about something such as their merch they bought or their t-shirt, etc and then asking things like "So how are you enjoying the convention so far" and going from there.

1/2

>>10920523
>>10920521
The key is to get their contact, If they play any games see if you both have a game in common, then you can just hit them with the ol "Oh wow I'm playing that right now as well, mind if I add you so we can play together later?". Or if you got a picture of them just say something like "You got a instagram or discord I can send this to?" before you both leave.

Again, don't be afraid of asking for contact info, guys are waaay more open to sharing this stuff then women are. I literally got this guys discord after running into him 4 times because he mentioned he played monster hunter and I was like "Oh shit I need help beating that game, mind if I add you?"

Really it's a lot like trying to make connections with women except the guy is like 50x more likely to actually want to follow through. It's fair to say that I haven't reaaaly tried to make connections with men at a con because I do want a girlfriend, but I'm 99% certain that it's far easier to make friends with men at cons then women, as this is the general vibe I got from my brief conversations with men. This guy I got a picture of literally gave me his phone number to send him a pic because his phone battery died, I literally only met him for 5 minutes, a woman would NEVER do that.

Basically just approach and try to have a conversation, see if you vibe with each other, then try to get their contact info and then you're all set, of course you may also tag along with them for the rest of the con if they're open to that as well.

>>10920427
She left you and so did anyone else. You're the common denominator. Probably because you're insufferable and you couldn't keep up the pretense of not being unhinged.

>>10920489
I have normie friends who have also had periods of being single that lasted more than a year. Completely normal.

>>10920491
If they don't respond with enthusiasm they're not interested. I'm sorry.

>>10920342
> why people keep on trying to pretend like cons are overrun with children on school trips

Major cons are not overrun with children, but smaller local cons (which could also be called meetups) often are.

> You're just feeling internally self conscious for engaging in what is admittedly childish behavior. (Kill the cringe in your heart)
> Secondly it's perfectly fine to interact with younger people on the con floor as long as it is in an appropriate way.

It’s not that I feel self-conscious or cringe when talking to younger people. Zoomers are cool, and I don’t hesitate to engage with them. However, occasionally they share experiences that are so unrelatable to me that it feels strange. For instance, they might not be able to attend a con because they don't have money or their parents won’t allow it. Issues like that haven’t been a thing for me in such a long time that I find it difficult to empathize, and it makes me feel awkward.

>>10920496
If you're the one who is always organising your hangouts and taking the initiative you should stop doing that. It's possible they like you but think you're going way too fast and not letting the friendship develop organically. It can be off putting for them to be placed in that position to the point where they never want to see you anymore. I've been on the receiving end of such a person (we're both autistic) and it feels suffocating. She also said "I'm happy to finally have a friend" before the friendship was mutual. That puts way too much pressure and responsibility on someone. They're putting all of their hopes, dreams and mental wellbeing on one person. I do not want to be in a position where I am the only one giving someone emotional support.

Instead of thinking "I have to message them and offer to organise something and then they might like me" you should think "we're just getting to know each other, I'm making sure they know I'm interested but I'm not going to go full speed ahead. I'll gage if they're also interested in me by leaving the ball in their court".
This is not "playing games", this is normal healthy behaviour. Relationships (all kinds) are not like video games where you pick the right dialogue and you can level up. There is no set of skills or some sort of tactic that guarantees that people want to be friends with you.

Stop putting all your eggs in one basket.

>>10920492
Women would love to do that. But then guys would complain "she's just saying that to ward off bad people, she's secretly keeping an eye out for Chad".
There should be a standard line of text women could use in their bio that says "don't approach me with the intent to start a relationship, I'm not interested ". But then bitter guys would message them and say "you're full of yourself, you're too ugly to need that banner. I'm not being mean, I'm just letting you know so you won't be disappointed later on".

>>10920511
Some partners aren't interested in anime, video games and manga. Or not to the extent they would want to spend time and money on a convention. Women are allowed to go to these things without their partners. She was clear and friendly enough to let you know in that way. She didn't assume you were interested in more than friendship.

>>10920516
Very healthy mindset. Good for you anon.

>>10920215
I have asked but he's not looking for a relationship currently. He had asked previously, many years ago, but at that time, I was the one who was not looking for a relationship. Our timings just never lined up.

>>10920543
Don't get me wrong, of course I agree they're allowed to do that. As a matter of fact my greentext was just nothing more than a funny little story to tell, absolutely no shade towards the woman in the story, of course.

HOWEVER it is potentially shitty of their partner to leave them high and dry at an anime convention by themselves, hell if I had a partner but I wasn't into anime or video games or manga I would STILL go with my partner cause I love her, you know? That's why it's very strange to me that a woman who's taken would attend an anime convention by herself, yes she's allowed to, 100%, but it does raise an eyebrow.

>>10920400
this is why no one wants to fuck you. you will die alone.

>>10920421
she almost certainly picked up on the freakazoid vibes and ghosted so she wouldn't end up found in his fridge 6 months later. this guys a mass shooter waiting to happen.

>>10920516
this exactly. being a man with female friends is like being peer reviewed.

>>10920536
hole post

>>10920551
I've had sex with multiple men and it has fulfilled me more than any interaction I've had with women in my life combined

>>10920499
It's surreal to realize some people talk about this mundane crap because they're actually passionate about it. At the same time though, it's a good reminder to not take con weebs for granted, especially the "normalfags" who don't cosplay. Do they know all the deepest lore and ancient memes? No, but they cared enough to come, which already means they're gonna be more interesting than someone on the street

>>10920360
>>10920540
>>10920524
i personally think your advice was really helpful -nayrt
>>10920548
yeah i do agree, aren't couples supposed to engage in each other's interests and support each other?

>>10920423
if you hate women this much, why are you so upset you got ghosted kek

>>10920574
Just more proof why she ditched you.

>>10920578
>>10920588
>getting baited this easily
women lol

>>10920605
>waaah they're laughing at me, I'll just pretend I wasn't serious.

>>10910760
Jesus fucking Christ that pikman is top shelf gold. I would absolutely spend an entire day following that guy around ignoring all the sexy people and just take pictures of him doing mundane things. >>10910760

>>10913722
This was me and two friends at a work conference we were at. Two of us were in one room and the third was rooming with another coworker who was much cooler than all of us put together. While we were on lunch, he hit a pawn shop and bought a PlayStation 2 with Star Wars battlefront 2 and four controllers thinking we’d all play together. After dinner the three of us gathered around the hotel TV and played Star Wars battlefront, and at around 2130 the fourth guy came back with a girl. They fucked on the bed while we played, and he literally said “don’t mind those guys, they’re cool and won’t do anything” and she said “I’d have been fine with one more.” Thinking it was a joke I snorted loudly and said “we already have a threesome here.” I don’t think she was joking. It was very, very uncomfortable for us and sometime around when they started round two we moved into the other room.

>>10913860
As one of those men I want to say I wholeheartedly support the second sentence here. I just like tiny girls, but I want them to look like women and not slobbery fucking Petri dish children.

>>10914069
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=RsYA8Gr5NTY

Do it.

>>10920666
nayrt, but yeah kids are gross. Thank goodness my friend's kids are past the "sticky hands will grab anything and snort snot on you" phase. I was not able to fully hide my revulsion. My friend wasn't offended, she thought it was super funny.
I like a variety of types of women. Including short, slim, young looking, flat chested women. But they need to be well into adulthood (25+) and not look like an actual kid.

Found out that my estranged father is a sissy.

We're facebook friends but he has a very restricted view of my profile but he makes alt instagram accounts and whenever I block them a new one pops up. He's in hospital severely ill and i've been tasked with cleaning out his hoarder house. I found a dress that looks very similar to an AP jsk I own. It's just a gingham dress in the same colour so hopefully it's just a coincidence...

The day I discovered this I had the urge to sell all of my lolita but I've clamed down a little since.

I feel physically sick but I can't talk to anyone about this because of the shame.

>>10920748
Why does it matter if other people know he is a sissy? I would say just ask for help clearing his house if you need to.

>con this weekend
>trying on old cosplay
>mask snaps in half
even if I manage to fix it it's gonna look ass

>tfw no online boyfriend to buy me cosplay
anyone want a cute cosplay gf?

>>10920548
I befriended a group of guys who literally only go to cons to play DDR and some of them were their with their gfs who were wandering around the convention somewhere else, I think it's honestly pretty assholy to NOT go to something like this with your partner, lord knows how many concerts of mid artists I've been to with girls lol but I still went because they wanted me to

>>10920829
are you female? how old are you, what region are you from, what's your bodytype and height, and would you ever want to meetup to go to cons together, and then have s*x (ideally in the cosplay I bought you). also drop a list of characters you've cosplayed before

>>10910760
Praise be to the inventors of Sensodyne and and spray deodorant. Sensodyne helps with my aching teeth and deodorant does what it says on the can. Cream and ball deodorants are a scam. I'd like all the ladies who tell people (online) to use a goddamn deodorant to specifically say "use a goddamn spray deodorant". This sounds like I'm throwing shade but I'm not. I wish I'd been told earlier. And for fuck's sake, people should wash. So many fucking pakis walking around thinking cologne is a substitute for a bath.

>>10920835
ya i am, i'd love to tell you more, got an email?

>>10920829
tits or gtfo

>>10918096
>>try to diet for 2 months
>>lose 0 lbs
>>try to increase exercise
>>go on walk
Holy fucking shit you're hilarious.
>t. /fit/izen

>>10919375
100%

>>10920865
stfu faggot

>>10920857
My favourite product is a roll on type deodorant antiperspirant combo. I also once bought a Korean spray that temporarily deactivates your sweat glands. That worked pretty well but I'm out of it and trying to track it down again.

>>10920752
Cleaning the house isn't the problem. It's feeling violated that he's stalking my social media and seeing photos of my friends in jfashion. We've all seen those weird flickr and pinterest albums. Sissies can do fucked up things with lolita photos.

Also the fact that he owns a dress that looks like a jsk I own.

>>10920952
if you don't want people to see pictures of you don't upload pictures of yourself to the internet ya cunt

>>10920908
That cannot be good for you.

>online friend/fwb tells me about going to cons, cosplaying, and banging guys
>realize it really probably is that easy you just have to not have the tism
>she offers to go with me and do it
>too scared to even though we’ve been online fwbs for ages
I wish I weren’t fucking schizoid but I cant fucking do it /cgl/. It literally isn’t even hard and I still can’t get over the internal barriers.
I barely even talked to strangers at the con I just went to, I didn’t wanna ask for pics of characters I really liked just cause I didn’t wanna annoy the people even though I know from cosplaying that that’s like the whole point. AaaaAAAAAAA

It just feels like I’ve massively regressed into myself: it’s very hard for me to open up or put on an act to convince myself its okay to talk to people.

>>10921114
Last emo bitching reply here but I really hate the dichotomy of these things. It’s very much not about the sex. I get there are plenty of guys motivated by that, I know one. But I don’t even want the sex. I’ve been propositioned a half dozen times over the years and I never accept. I want to make a spontaneous connection with someone I would have otherwise never met and I want to be allowed to be attracted to them. I’m around so few people that share my passions at work and though I interact with a lot of people when teaching it’s completely the wrong feeling. I want to talk to someone about their passions and be treated as an equal and mystery. And treat them as an equal and mystery. All my other relationships have such structural boss-worker/teacher-student fundamentals that I can never open up about things and feel passion. I’m just a slave in a necktie walking year after year to the gallows.