/cgl/ - Cosplay & EGL

One day I will actually clean my room

>>10893411
I won't

>>10893410
>another year of no cosplay gf

>>10893420
I know that feel anon-san. I was in the "talking phase" with a potential one but it never went anywhere despite us hitting it off pretty well at the last con we met at and texting for months. So close yet so far once again.

I haven't worn lolita since my cat died in August :( I still like looking at my dresses and don't feel like completely leaving lolita, but I used to dress up in my room or to go out with friends just because and I don't have the urge to do any of that anymore

>>10893420
why do you specifically want a cosplay gf?

I managed to become a nuclear punk rock n roll yippe ki yay cavalier cowboy 1970s-80s Irish thug Western ruffian. But now what? I guess I'll go get that PhD, keep playing rugby, drinking whiskey, hitting the dace floors Friday night, almost getting myself killed on frozen mountains, and cross my fingers somewhere like Los Alamos picks me up so I can take this as far as it goes.

>>10893420
would an online cosplay girlfriend suffice? i'm a ronery spergy girl.

>>10893517
Just want someone that shares my interest, preferably cosplay but as long as they are into anime that's good as well.

>>10893529
post tits or gtfo

convinced a guy to dress up as Toko Fukawa to work for Halloween LOL

>>10893420
Maybe cosplay bf? I'm sure they can dress like Sui

>>10893566
2024 will be the year I get a cosplay bf or I will die trying

been wearing lolita with varying frequency for years and I've always been happy by myself but for the first time I find myself wishing I had a local friend to share the fashion with.
I can dress my best friend up with me when I go out but it's not the same, I want someone who gets the appeal of the subculture.
my local comm's fb page is pretty dead and I have no idea if/ where they migrated...

>>10893420
>>10893567
Every girl past 18 at cons is either in a relationship, ugly, or an actual prostitute with an OnlyFans fucking guys her dad's age in the hotels. Facts.

>>10893591
>ugly, or an actual prostitute with an OnlyFans fucking guys her dad's age in the hotels.
Not dealbreakers.

>month 2 of stronglifts 5x5
>having a good time
>need to work in a cardio routine because my heart feels like shit half the time
>struggling to incorporate couch to 5k without having exercise eclipse all my free time and/or getting burnt out
Wat do

I'm extremely conflicted if I want to drop from my Katsu room. On one hand I haven't really had fun there in years and it kind of feels like I'm just going out of habit. On the other, if I cancel I only have one other con planned for the whole year and it feels silly to put all my eggs into the ACEN basket.

>>10893684
Commute by bicycle

>>10893529
queen you do NOT want the male specimens that post on /cgl/.

I don't even talk to girls at cons anymore since EVERY girl who isn't ugly is either in a realtionship or underage. And yeah, I'm ugly too but I don't like talkibg to ugly people since it reminds me I am ugly. Why do grown women not cosplay anymore

>>10893748
Ugly girls won't even talk to me.

>>10893790
What? Why? Even 9/10 girls try to talk to me when I cosplay and it's annoying. Girls who cosplay seem to like talking to ugly deformed guys idk

>>10893410
No way am I going to Christmas cons when I've had diarrhea since Thanksgiving.... of 2021.

11 years with no weeb gf still. IMy main problem that gets in my way is social skills, and it's hard to engage in a conversation when you find someone attractive at a anime con.

Why are so many lolitas incapable of basic hygiene. I'm constantly shocked when I see a coord pic and it looks like a tornado bodied their bedroom. Or their hair is extremely greasy/burnt from dyes. I don't know if I want to go to cons. What if they smell and it's amplified by the sweaty poly dresses

>>10893410
I'm going to the local con this Saturday with a friend and I know it's going to be shit but I wanted to go because I'll bring my 3ds and I want to play with streetpass before it's too late. It's now a normie event about Asia in general compared to 10 years ago.

>>10893807
Yeah
Every time attractive girls try to hit on me I just think
>wtf why is she so mentally ill why would she be interested in me go away
Then I pretend to be gay

>have chubby cosplay gf
>she loses weight but keeps the boobs
>suddenly gets a lot of attention online
>starts an onlyfans
>ditches me for chad

>>10893832
for me its
>shes probably like this with everyone she meets
and I brush it off

>>10893833
Nice larp.chad isn't a real thing
Take your meds schizo
>>10893836
It's pretty obvious when girls single you out at cons
Usually they send their less pretty friends to try and talk

>try to talk to girls at con
>they come up to me for picture, after taking it they thank me and immediately start walking away
how do i talk to them

>>10893851
if its a custom made cosplay and you know your stuff ask them how they made X they will begin rambling

>>10893854
nta, but ah, the good ole, whamen in general love to be psyopsed and being played mind tricks

>>10893851
>girl asks me for picture
>decide to be nice after we take selfie and tell her she looks cute
>she starts talking to me for 30 minutes, asking me if I'm single etc.
The real hard part is getting girls to fuck off

My local comm has been invaded by cringy tiktok ita zoomers. It’s super embarrassing.
I’ve had the displeasure of interacting with a few of them before in random passing but we have a meet coming up and it is going to be a nightmare.
I hope I wasn’t as insufferable as them when I was that age.

>>10893936
I think there are definitely things about zoomers that tend to be different from older generations (morals, views, general attitude towards things) but if there are other people attending who are closer to your age or older I would just go to the meet and make the best of it.

Furthermore, I don't know how old these zoomers are, but teen weebs (which many teens in the lolita community are) have always had the capacity to be embarrassing and insufferable whether it's 17 in 2023 or 17 in the 2000s. Stuff like glomping, being overly familiar with strangers, breaking out in anime songs, adding random bits of Japanese, etc.

>>10893938
Oh i hope they behave themselves at the meet.
There will be a few in our 30s there but god damn the kids are ridiculous. I think they’re all adults mostly. From what I’ve seen online they seem to delight in ‘breaking the rules’ and then acting like victims/rebels about it even tho nobody gives a fuck. So I am expecting some ~look at meeeee~ behaviour a la danger-chan.

>>10893936
>>10893992
Seeing memebers of the emofag generation seethe about kids these days will never stop being funny to me

>>10893936
>>10893992
>cringy tiktok ita zoomers
>they seem to delight in ‘breaking the rules’ and then acting like victims/rebels about it even tho nobody gives a fuck
My comm has a few of these too. They're easy enough to ignore but I do question if these new 'rule breaker' itas are even interested in lolita at all if it's not their version of it. They get offended when someone tells them to wear a blouse or proper shoes. At least when we were cringey ita weebs we still tried our best to do research and dress properly, even if we didn't always get it right.

>>10893529
contact info?

>>10893529
please be east coast anon-chan

new cosplay contest dramu just dropped. If evelfettcosplay or any of the contestants are seagulls pls post your pov

>>10893529
please be west coast

A couple of weeks ago, I went to a con I expected to be shit, but I actually had a great time, I got into a mood I haven't been in at cons in a really long time, I was doing stuff, talking to people, and I also encountered a big crowd of people singing and dancing to Bumblebee, which was probably the highlight of the con. I remembered that that used to be something really fun that used to happen at cons, but I don't think I'd seen it in a really long time and I'd almost forgotten that those things were something that happened.
I'm glad I went to that con, it really brought back some experiences I hadn't had in a very long time.

Except towards the end, when I saw someone I often see at cons, and we usually exchange a few quick words. Anyway, I was feeling in a much more positive mood than usual, and actually approached him a bit more in hope that we could actually talk more and maybe have a good conversation, but he pulled away, and was just too busy with his friend so I couldn't get in at all. Totally ruined my mood, he really didn't want anything to do with me it felt like. And my mood for the rest of the con was ruined too.
This has gotten me thinking, maybe part of the reason I always have a bad time at cons is that the cons are filled with people I know from elsewhere. There were a few people at this con too, but I actually talked to them quite a bit and didn't feel so rejected. If I went to cons with no one I'd met before, maybe I'd have a slightly better experience? Not focusing on all the people I wish I could have a relationship with? I'm sure it's not the only reason I feel bad being alone, but maybe it contributes.

Anyway, the person who didn't want to talk to me, I've actually had a desire to talk to him and maybe meet with him outside of cons for years now, but with that being our last encounter, and he also doesn't seem that receptive when I message him, it'd probably be a bad idea to try, I don't want to lose what we have either.

I just paid for a dress I thought would just remain a distant dream forever, now it's just waiting for it to be shipped and hoping nothing goes wrong. I'm excited.
The price was quite reasonable too, even though it still hurt my wallet.

>>10894143

I had a similar encounter, saw someone at a local con who used to be a con buddy, hadn't seen him in a few years though. Said hi and was hyped to introduce him to my new cosplay group. He looked me up and down, and went "Okay bye" and walked 10 feet away from me and continued browsing the artist alley. I was dressed as Ishiguro from Kaguya sama, which my group was doing that day, and is barely different from my street clothes, so I couldn't have offended him with my cosplay. It would have ruined my mood too, but I met another old friend right after that, and we cracked each other up reminiscing about the silly shit we used to do, so I wasn't complete shit at being social. Was happy to introduce friend #2 to my group and we all hung out after that.

Sometimes people are just cold or uninterested, and you can't do anything about it. The best thing is to just move on and find people who match your energy and want to talk to you. Forcing it just makes it worse.

>>10894143

I had a similar encounter, saw someone at a local con who used to be a con buddy, hadn't seen him in a few years though. Said hi and was hyped to introduce him to my new cosplay group. He looked me up and down, and went "Okay bye" and walked 10 feet away from me and continued browsing the artist alley. I was dressed as Ishigami from Kaguya sama, which my group was doing that day, and is barely different from my street clothes, so I couldn't have offended him with my cosplay. It would have ruined my mood too, but I met another old friend right after that, and we cracked each other up reminiscing about the silly shit we used to do, so I wasn't complete shit at being social. Was happy to introduce friend #2 to my group and we all hung out after that.

Sometimes people are just cold or uninterested, and you can't do anything about it. The best thing is to just move on and find people who match your energy and want to talk to you. Forcing it just makes it worse.

To receive a cosplay bf/gf
Sign up for Duolicious
(this is probably a lie but it can't hurt)
the dev shills it in his dedicated thread in /soc/
I shill it far and wide so more women will sign up because I have sunk cost fallacy from answering all 2000 questions
It's a dating app/site except your prospects are limited to autistic 4channers
Perfect for cugglers

>>10894307
i tried a bunch of non mainstream dating apps but they are all dead

>>10894309
This one isn't quite dead because he advertises it on 4chan through actual ads (opened up a new browser without adblock one time and saw one on here)
but it's dead-adjacent as the dev will admit, seems to be growing slowly though even with inactive account culls

>>10894309
also tell me which ones I should try, I almost signed up for some mindfulness meme one because I want to seek out other virgins and some article said it might have more, and I almost tried out Hinge but I don't really believe it's different from tinder

>>10894307
I made an account and I'm having more fun doing the Q&A than actually responding to men. What do I do now?

>>10894307
I found my current partner on FB dating, its actually pretty decent at matching autists with other autists. Probably based on mutual groups or something.

>most posts are troll posts or moid tfwnogf posts
>No more enjoyable cgl feels
It's over...

>>10894334
keep answering questions and responding i guess

>>10893591
Nigga just say you're a pedophile.

Why do the mods ban you for criticizing trannies now?

>>10893936
Then... just don't go? Problem solved

I don't where to post this but i'm really disgusted and scared by amount of zoomers getting to j-fashion and are into self harm and have eating disorders.

Since I have been seeing spike of these people in twitter and it goes like
>awww what a j-fashion mag scan for girly or lolita, let see more of their account.
>sees bio:shtwt/edtwt - underaged zoomer
>i retreat

what is causing an uptic of these people getting j-fashion?

what is happening to young adults (18-25) into J-fashion, I don't really see a lot em any more,i really want to find people my range age into fashion, have all went to discord or got into western hypebeast fashion instead.

I'm acquiring new pieces faster than I can wear them and it's actually stressing me out. Every weekend I'm helping someone move or going to the dump or someone cancelled and it's too late to go anywhere alone. I just want a couple free days where I can go out and show off my new clothes dammit!

>>10894562
menhera/yamikawaii and jirai kei got big in the west, and while neither were originally intended to glorify mental illness in their original jp context, they became very popular with the western Glorify Mental Illness crowd.

but lolitas have always been psychos. EDs and BPDchan behaviour have been pretty commonplace since LJ

>>10894562
we still have EDs, we just don't announce them in our bios like retards.

>>10894579
>>10894582
Yeah, I wasn't going to go full old days better since crazies is always a part and parcel being into beauty or fashion communities, I remember fashion tumble blogs and beauty yt channels having constant drama and very interesting to say at least personalities.

But I have been seeing a uptic of more younger (below 18) crazy people in these communities

>>10894591
well if it makes you feel any better, being mentally ill is "hip" now, so it's also possible a good portion of those kids will "grow out of it" so to speak. on the other hand, j-fashion as a whole has always had a bit of an ED problem, probably in part due to the fact japanese "free" sizes can run pretty small depending on the brand. i took a break from j-fashion myself in my younger years because i'd started turning "fitting into (insert notoriously small brand or item here)" into goalposts. j fashion has also maintained a fairly stable anti-fat stance, whereas many western fashions have caved entirely. some anachans also use jfashion coord shots as thinspo or use them as "subtle" body checks. it's an easy community to get away with ED bullshit if you're smart enough about it, so it attracts tons of these types. hell, you could argue jirai kei spawned from the infestation of these types.

tldr i see what you mean, i hope some of it is just teens being teens, but i do kind of think j-fashion and its communities are, unfortunately, kind of bait for craziness. whether it's fetishists, anachans, actual nutjobs, or teenagers pretending to be crazy, a LOT of people get into jfashion for the wrong reasons.

>>10894562
Lolita fashion in particular (I can't speak about other jfashions) has always had a larger % of people with eating disorders than the average female population in the west. Possible reasons are that alternative fashions have always attracted more people with mental health issues, and the fact that generally westerners are taller and less narrowly built compared to the Japanese even if you were only comparing healthy weight individuals. So basically you have a group of girls and young women, with vulnerable mental health, in a fashion hobby where being part of the community and being recognised as such is important to them, trying to fit into a Japanese S or M that is for people considerably shorter and more narrowly built than them. I'm not saying lolita fashion causes eating disorders. But it has certainly been known to help develop it if the seed was already there.
In the past, in the lolita community, if you were open about having an eating disorder or tried to hide it but people found little clues here and there, you would be thoroughly mocked and no-one wanted to associate with you. Today's social climate is quite different. Diet talk in general is NG. And even if it's acceptable you're supposed to say it's for your health even if you're only doing it to be smaller to fit into clothes and don't care about your health.

>>10894618
>whereas many western fashions have caved entirely.
I started seeing more them flock when hollister and victoria's secret started offering more sizes
>hell, you could argue jirai kei spawned from the infestation of these types
It was bit of a shame but it was bound to happen

I like jirai-kei since i'm sucker for pink and black, thanks draculaura....
I feel the least affected style is gyaru strangely but do have to have curves for gyaru
>tldr i see what you mean, i hope some of it is just teens being teens, but i do kind of think j-fashion and its communities are, unfortunately, kind of bait for craziness. whether it's fetishists, anachans, actual nutjobs, or teenagers pretending to be crazy, a LOT of people get into jfashion for the wrong reasons.
this is fashion and beauty (even outside of jfashion) community in fucking general

>>10894622
AYRT you're exactly right and that's what i was getting at, thank you.

>>10894623
i think gyaru probably rings as too close to mainstream western fashion to appeal to kids who want to be Not Like Other Girls. that or the subset of kids that think gyaru is racist because tanning.

another factor might be pricing. younger people used to be kind of priced out of certain j fashion styles and had to default to simpler ones or western fashions that were "j fashion inspired". these days it's easier than ever to get cheap chinese knockoff items, so youths and the unemployed started flooding in.

>>10894622
I know that where you live can influence your opinion on this topic, but I personally think the whole “Lolita fashion increases chance of ed cause westerners are taller and curvier” is complete BS. I live in the us and most woman here are about 155cm - 165cm tall and at healthy weights (at least here in florida), which standard sizing in lolita has always accommodated. Of course, I’m not denying that there is girls that naturally cannot fit into average lolita sizing but if your at a healthy weight you should at least be able to fit into AP. It also doesn’t help that beauty standards here in the us promote curvier bodies, but girls like that probably wouldn’t wanna wear lolita anyway. Also, can we stop this stupid stereotype that “alternative = mental illness” it has always stemmed from misunderstandings from normies no matter how you spin it.

>>10894702
maybe not everyone wants to wear ugly ass AP

>>10893590
Probably Discord. Many comms have moved there.

I hate Instagram now. When they changed everything about the tags a few months back (only top posts come up in tag searches, shadowbanning lolita-related tags, etc), my engagement dropped like a stone. But I don't really want to move to another platform.

>>10894702
>Also, can we stop this stupid stereotype that “alternative = mental illness” it has always stemmed from misunderstandings from normies no matter how you spin it.
Like good chuck of ppl I know how are into Lolita or girly-kei just like cute clothes and dressing up cute and mentally ok or well.
Also, funny how western fashion brands are quickly finding out there's a market for hyper feminine stuff for women.

>>10894702
NAYRT i don't believe lolita causes EDs, i just think it attracts a lot of girls in western communities that already have them because some aspects of the subculture give anachans a lot of plausible deniability

>>10894702
Ayrt, I'm from a European country where my height (167cm) is considered on the short side. And people here are not that dainty/narrowly built (this has nothing to do with body fat and everything to do with shoulder width, hip width, rib cage, etc). Also bigger boobs than the Japanese. Healthy weight people here are generally above a Japanese size M, which means stuff like VM, MM, some older sweet stuff, a lot of gothic lolita stuff, just isn't going to fit them. AP is made for people below 160cm according to wonder tea party. Nearly every jp brand has some pieces that will even fit genuinely fat people, but aside from meta plus size and MAM lovely size those are far and few between. Imo fully shirred pieces aren't made to accommodate western plus size, the shirring isn't supposed to stretch all the way to the max. Plus sized Japanese lolitas are typically shorter and are built like a keg (they don't have a large measurement difference between bust and waist). Very generous full back shirring wasn't always there either. If you have a bust in the upper 90s, which you certainly don't have to be fat for, then a lot of lolita pieces just aren't going to fit. Modern sweet tends to be more accommodating, sure, but what if you're into old school or gothic (and dislike atepie) or classic. Some people will say "just don't wear lolita then, it's not made for you", but that's just the point I'm trying to make. It's not made for some people, even if they have a healthy weight, but that's not something these girls are willing to accept, so they go on a diet even if they don't need to lose weight.

And regarding the mental health comment. It's a stereotype that goths are depressed. It's a fact that alternative fashions (and this includes happy colorful stuff) attract people with mental health issues. There's nothing wrong with that persay.

>>10894143
I just sent him a message suggesting to hang out. I hope it doesn't ruin things. It's okay to be a bit cringe in messages right? And you can still keep going like normal in real life?

>>10894303
I'm so bad at finding people who want to talk to me, I'm almost always alone at cons and I always end up alone elsewhere too
I don't know what I can do, but forcing it may be worth a try. I've often almost leaned the opposite way, trying to subtly signal to people that I don't want to talk to them. Am I really that unlikable or could it be that I haven't applied enough pressure to find people, it may be worth finding out

>>10893410
I'm so tired of teens with no rent or bills to pay getting into lolita and driving the prices up. Old school is all the rage right now so old releases that were ignored and called ita that would go for 50$ now go for 300 or more. I'm very salty about this. I want the TikTok gen Z to fuck off and jump onto another fad already.

>>10893410
>tfw Aliexpress sends you the version of the costume with a bang zipper
At least I can pee wearing it?

any seagulls play wow classic hc or wanna play?? I wanna play a rouge to scratch my mmorpg itch I barely played wow before tho so I dont know much about it. kinda wanna play till I die

>>10895070
You just have to wait it out unfortunately. Take a hiatus from buying stuff for a while until the market goes back to normal once the zoomers get bored and leave (and realize no one else is going to pay $500 for their 30 year old dresses that they spent their mommy and daddy's money to buy)

>>10895185
>4,057 miles away
omw

>>10895070
i feel you, anon.
>be himegyaru
>secondhand market is basically mine
>buy up everything constantly
>gal boom happens
>$70 dresses go for $1000+
>bought up by idiots who don't even wear it correctly or know what himegyaru is
>cry

They should put a BMI cap at cons. All these fat bitches trying to look and act cute are insulting my eyes. They look like satire.

>>10893567
Remember anon, when nothing is left, you still got your oshi to believe in

>>10895341
fuck, meant to reply to>>10893420

>>10895314
The worst is when you see them wearing corsets

>>10895314
Post body

I recently started going to cons this year and it's helped me get more comfortable with talking to people. It's pretty nice, people are usually friendly and I love taking pics with cosplayers.
>>10893500
I'm so sorry to hear that :(

>>10893410
>tfw no femboy bf

>Started thinking about doing commissions, friend was first customer.
>Was excited and completed it in time for deadline. Spent weeks on it.
>Seeing it as a slice of optimism in my bleak neet life
>Ask for payment and can't be paid in full immediately and won't specify when I'll get paid back by.
>sad, broke, can't continue to do commissions as i can't pay for machine repairs until i get paid
> feeling stiffed and reluctant to ever do commissions for people I know again.

>>10895251
>>10895070
I hope it doesn't happen to menhera or girly-kei, any time soon

>>10895406
Always ask for the money upfront. You are delivering a product, not a service. If they complain say that its easier to cover material costs.

I hate Fedex so much, how they insist on delivering on the door so you're just forced to sit at home waiting for them all day, and then they don't deliver after all so you have to wait the next day as well. Why can't they just use pickup points like reasonable shipping services do, that would be so much faster and more convenient.

i got in to crypto to finance my costumes.
And by the looks of it im going to get the newest and greatest ones next con season

I moved recently and still haven't found a good spot at my new place for doing a self-shoot.
Some walls have a darker shade that doesn't provide good contrast and separation, the lighting is not quite as good, and overall I don't have an easy "take the poster off this wall and photograph yourself there" spot anymore. Plus I live on a lower floor now so I'm self-conscious that somebody's gonna walk by and see me dressed like a weirdo if I'm posed near open curtains for natural light.

>>10895473
they do use pickup points. click the tracking number and somewhere on the page there should be some option to choose to have the package held at a location and select a location on a map, including fedex stores, package lockers, and even some outlets like walgreens.

>>10895411
Menhera "fashion" is already cheap mass produced garbage, there's no way it's going to get scalped like that.

>>10895063
I feel you, I'm stuck squarely in the 'forgettable friend' zone pretty much my whole life.
I don't know how to fix it either

>>10893410
My friend is 20 but looks about 12. How do I warn her that her Tiktok fans are all peedophiles?

>>10895513
98% chance she already knows.

>>10895513
Tell me her Tiktok name I will let her know.

>>10895513
My sister posted a Tiktok where her costume was bunched in the crotch and now her comments are full of trap lovers who think she has a dick.

>>10895513
They're fucking everywhere. The baby-faced 20 year old thots who take racy pics dressed as child characters.

Yeah, nice Hololife Gura costume. No, Twitter don't doesn't need pics of your bald little slit or your size 0 "breasts." My bf didn't return your messages because he's not a closet p3d0, slut.

>>10893420
>another year of no any gf
>Closest I ever get to women being interested in me is at cons
>Going to be a few months before I get to go to another con
It hurts

>>10895849
If you get women interested in you in any capacity you have no right to complain.

>>10893420
>to an other year of no cosplay bf

>>10895406
What's going on with your machine? A lot of times it's easy to fix. -Sewing machine repair tec.

>>10895881
It's the closest I get, but it's still not very close.
More like "Not totally ignored every time"

I didn’t get the bidet hyped till I got one installed in my bathroom and that shit is a game changer. especially the ones with heated seating my god im never standing up to pee ever again

>>10895881
I know I'm the problem, thanks.

>>10895513
Who cares. She's an adult. She gets views. It's like with men on OF and how most of their subs are gay. It's not like the models ever meet their subs.

>>10895513
I forgot to say. Wtf friends are you that you can't just talk to her. "Hey, you look underage and you'll attract creeps". You sound more like a creep who sees attention from others as competition. Just talk to her.

>>10893745
I met my spouse in college but we were both 4chan browsers. Big difference was that he had a big family, had a good enough family that they could pay for extracurricular activities and was very social.
Most normal, well adjusted guy I ever dated and now we live a comfortable life together.
4chan was a big website once, you never know the type of person you're talking to.

>get cosplay gf
>interest in cosplay and sewing wanes because new anime doesn't seem interesting and doesn't have anyone I like
>occassionally get an idea for a project (e.g. fleece jacket), buy up materials for it, it doesn't go anywhere
>get 3D printer, which takes up even more hobby time

my last made cosplay was David from Edgerunners, a little over a year ago. Getting mad at myself that I can't motivate myself to finish projects anymore

>>10895518
This. If you actually think grown adults don't realize who they are appealing to then you are delusional. Some just don't care (as is their right)

>>10895513
Every squad got the:
>con mom
>prematurely bald 25 year old man
>slutty college girl who looks 12
>guy who lost 3 toes in the coast guard

>>10893410
i can't find female friends because they all hate me and find themselves in competition with me for whatever reason even when i do nothing but compliment, reassure them and give them my time and resources. at least men will treat me likea human being even if they do wanna fuck me

>>10896217
I rarely meet women who are like the women you describe. You're probably only looking in social circles/environments where this type of woman is more common (might also be cultural).
Back in 2019 I was starting to get to know a woman who turned out to be very competitive. One major way this became apparent was about weight. I had lost a significant amount of weight before I knew her and kept it off. She had been fat for most of her adult life and was starting to get interested in weight loss. She was open to advice so I gave her some helpful and sensible info that made it easier to cook from scratch, ditch the junk food and soda. It worked, she had lost some weight. Of course I cheered her on. She made some comments along the lines of "if this keeps going I'll be slimmer than you" that were obviously intended to make me feel bad or threatened. That surprised me. But I didn't feel bad or threatened and continued to cheer her on. She got angry that I didn't react the way she wanted me to.
That made me think that the main way of pissing off competitive people, and outing themselves as competitive people, is by being very clear you don't consider yourself in competition with them. I ended the budding friendship with this woman, I have no interest at all in being friends with someone like that. All my close friendships are with other women, and they're all great people with similar morals, we build each other up. If competitive and resentful people were my only options for friendships, I would rather have no friends at all.

Also, I'm not saying you can't be real friends with guys, but it helps if they don't want to fuck you because at least then you'll know their niceness is genuine. I was friends with this one guy because he often talked about how much he loved his wife, and posted about her on social media, so I thought this was a real, genuine friendship. But I was wrong because he still wanted to get it on with me. So I ended that friendship.

>>10896217
continued;
another friendship with a guy I thought was genuine and safe, was because the guy was way out of my league. Like an 8 or a 9 compared to a 4. I thought there was no way he'd be into me, so the friendship must be legit. I was wrong again. I'm not writing off all male-female friendships, but I'm currently not close friends with any, and I would feel a lot more like it's genuine if he's gay.

>>10896220
>>10896221
nta but people tend to attract the same kinds of people good and bad. in both anon and your case, it's how you're presenting yourselves. i had similar issues as anon before when i had a more kind and shy demeanor. girls would often seek me out as a kind of lackey and get mad when i didn't adhere to expectations. now that i present myself as more outgoing those girls tend to not interact with me (but for some reason hate me for getting attention) and my current friends are more secure with themselves. as far as men go, you're just presenting yourself in a way that's attractive to them. try altering how you speak to them when you interact with them and see what happens. it sucks, but people do judge you based on demeanor, phenotype, clothing/cosplay and even just the way you speak. i hate not being my real self, even though i'm initially shy, but i realized that initial shyness isn't even that to begin with, and once i started being more selective and critical about my first impressions i stopped interacting with those kinds of people. also a quick aside, gay men often evny their woman friends due to women having a larger dating pool so it's difficult to win with men in general. the few men i am friends with have extremely devoted relationships.

I finally found the perfect woman for me, everything I've ever wanted in a woman. We met coming home from a bar last year and we hit it off from there. I was shy but cocky and she seemed to like that. I was addicted to coke and she was an alchoholic at the time but somehow we made it through together. Its funny cause at first she didn't think I was into her, I didn't notice the advances she was making on me and she thought I was brushing her off but eventually we kissed and made love and ever since then we've been together. It's been a really good year and we've had our ups and downs, even vacationed at Disney World together but today seemed different and I'm afraid she'll leave me. The past week we haven't talked much because of finals at my school and after they were done and it was the weekend we still didn't and she mentioned it to me. Today I woke up to an angry paragraph about her feeling like I don't love her cause this isn't the first time it happened. The earlier tonight she called sobbing. I've never felt so shit and I think she's going to leave me. I know the phrase "there's plenty of fish" but honestly I don't care. She made me feel genuine love that I've never felt and I don't believe any other woman could do that and honestly I don't want one to. My love life ends with her, I love her bros and I'll live a miserable life without her.

>>10896228
Ayrt, I think you're right. But I think the solution is also not easy.
I am quite confident in general and don't go looking for friendships with a scarcity mentality. About friendships with men though, I think I'm missing something about the selection process. I've heard a lot of men say that they don't think a male female friendship is possible. Based on former outcomes I think there's a possibility I'm still too naive about men, but on the other hand I think it's too drastic to never consider friendships with men again. One of my friends called me prime neckbeard bait, and I understand where that is coming from (nerdy interests, younger looking, bubbly personality) and I understand that tends to attract certain men. If I knew how to tell if a man was genuinely interested in being friends with me (and not as a stepping-stone for something else) that would make everything easier. I also don't think it's right to change how I am around men. I'm the same around men and women imo. I would also not know what to change about my behaviour around men.

>>10896230
being married yourself is helpful. i can't remember the last time a man only interacted with me solely to try to fuck me, but i've been married for years now

>>10896244
I imagine people do respect that as a boundary to some extent.

I hate this shithole country and I would rather evade taxes than dress in whatever homeless looking outfits brazilian "fashion" is comprised of
I cannot even imagine the amount of seethe you must be feeling to be so mad people are not buying your ugly ass clothes that you endlessly complain to the government until they force prohibitive taxes that rape anyone who doesn't want to buy local slop

>be me at a con
>hanging out with con friends
>guy comes up, talks to all of us, starts to single me out and be weird
>mildly uncomfortable but it comes with the territory and nobody's really picking up on it so whatever i won't mention it
>don't mention it
>afterwards friend is like woah.... you okay anon...? we all need to take accountability... you guys we all need to be doing better...
>5 minutes of perv discomfort is now extended into the discomfort of kid gloves for the rest of the night by a guy who didn't say anything during the actual interaction
HHHHHHHHHHHHHH

>>10896229
you just werent talking because of finals, just show her that things will be different, you got this bro

>>10896221
>the guy was way out of my league
This isn't how male attraction works. We don't calculate your value and compare it against ours. There are some traits that we find desirable. If a girl has them then we will either be blinded to her flaws or come to find them endearing.

>>10896291
I thought you were argentinian.

>>10896352
That's not how we are told it works though. The way that people often talk about physical attractiveness is by giving someone a number out of ten of where they fall on the scale of societal beauty standards. This idea can be dismissed as shallow and juvenile but then science comes along. There are studies about this topic. For example one saying people generally know very well on where they fall on this scale, and they tend to partner up with people of a similar physical attractiveness level. It doesn't have to be the exact same, it's a range. And men tend to aspire to date women more attractive than them.
Being friends with someone for a long time beforehand can change things, and cause people to fall in love with someone they would not have considered an option before. Attraction is not a conscious thing, people aren't making a conscious decision to be attracted or not. But the outcome is still that they tend to end up with people of a similar physical attractiveness level. And you wouldn't typically see an 8/10 man with a 4/10 woman when it comes to relationships.

But a 8/10 man just looking for sex without a relationship might still consider a 4/10 woman. He might think "it's a hole". Now you can call me cynical, but you cannot deny that some men do talk amongst themselves like this so it's only normal to reason that there's some truth to what they tell their friends.

>>10895063
We ended up hanging out for a day, and it was pretty nice. Walking around stores, looking at things, we even ended up at a restaurant.
I kept feeling uncertain though, because he kept asking if I knew when I'd be going home, so it felt a bit like he just wanted me to leave, but he also said that it was good that I messaged him, and we did end up hanging out until he had a really good reason to end it, so I'll take it optimistically.
He also helped me buy some basic makeup so I can maybe try to get started with that a bit better, which was nice. And he suggested that I could be invited to his friends' hotel room when I said I'd never been at a hotel room at a con before, which is a very interesting thought but realistically it's the type of thing people say without it ever happening so I shouldn't really expect it.

The biggest bummer was that I had a bad stomach that day and also barely slept so I didn't feel in top shape, but oh well.

Overall I am really happy with how it turned out, and I may ask him again later, it's just the matter of finding the right balance because he'll maybe see me at cons in a few months and I don't want it to be too much.
It was a bit awkward though, at cons I'm always in a rush to say as much as possible because he doesn't really have much time for me, but now it was hard to get started talking, it did get better though. I hope I can visit again, and I hope it doesn't have to wait until next December.

>>10893410
I saw my friend's butt hole at HolMat. She was climbing on the bed and her pajamas slid down. No underwear. Wide open. What thef uck do I do now? Merry Christmas

>>10894753
I'm so glad I easily fit into most brand naturally

>>10896677
Was she at least good looking or is that image permaseared into your brain?

Somebody stole my package with a new dress in it. People fucking suck

>>10897359
that sucks. are you able to get the money back through postal insurance at least?

>>10897362
I can see about it but I think probably not

>>10897126
She is "hot" but I not lesbian.

>>10895406
Ask them again in a week or two and explain it's for repairs. Tell them you upheld your end of the bargain and you expect the common decency to have your end upheld.

If they're not gonna do it, they're a shitty friend.

>>10895881
>Bawwwwww feel sad for us lonelies we have it harder than you
Stop being a crab in the bucket before I chuck you into the pot, you miserable fuck

>>10896677
Several of my friends have seen my big juicy cock. One of them even commented that the angle of the dick pic I sent to my gf wasn't flattering because it was straight on into the lens. I said I'd do better next time.

I once walked in on my friend fucking his fiancee and they asked how long I had been there, and I replied "about since missionary" and we all laughed before I excused myself to get drunk at the bar.

Don't be weird about it, the human body isn't anything to be ashamed of.

>>10897508
Crab in a bucket? I hate when people use that analogy. I'm a crab in a glass tank locked shut. You're on the outside of the tank pretending to be trapped in here with me when you could really just walk free at any time. There's no climbing out for people like me.

>>10893410
When I send my mom food pics from the con, I make sure a friend's boobs are visible in the BG. That will stave off her grandkid begging for at least a week.

>tfw wants to start collecting cosplayers signed polaroid like Pokemon cards
>Nobody selling
Anybody here knows anyone selling?

>>10897857
What are you saying? The kid begs for pics of your friend's boobs?

>>10897879
are you retarded?

Now that I can look fully back at the year in retrospect
>Went to at least one convention every month
>Didn't outdo my record from last year but came close
>Introduced to two new scenes
>My main costume is likely gone and irreplaceable
>Highs weren't near as high as 2022
>Lows weren't nearly as low either
I'd call it totally middle of the road, but obviously this would be considered excess for 99%+ of people. I'm taking it a bit slower this time, but there's still a few more major stops left on my checklist. Upwards and onwards

>>10893590
I see this is a common question, that spreadsheet where all comms were listed is outdated. Who could update it and add a Discord column? This could be a useful project for the new year.

>>10897879
I had to reread it like 3 times to get it too anon it’s okay. Anon said that when she takes food pics to send to her mom from the con she makes sure to include her friends booba in it to get her mom to not ask her for grandkids for awhile

>>10898010
But why would boobs stave off grandkid begging?

>>10898011
Maybe it makes the mom think she is a lesbian and can't have kids

I'll never see some nice Helltaker and Murder Drones cosplayers irl.

I've never been into anything as much as lolita, but I have a feeling it's my time to leave the fashion. It's been affecting me negatively for a while now, and neither owning the clothes, even my dream dresses, nor wearing them, brings me joy anymore. I just never feel like my wardrobe is good enough, and I know I'm not good enough to wear what I do own. The obsessive searching for the next wishlist item, the inevitable missed listing or lost auction, the FOMO that forces me to make purchases I regret later on, the pieces I end up not fitting - it all adds up and makes me a depressed, anxious mess.
To be fair, it's not just lolita, nothing makes me happy anymore. But when my only way to cope with the ongoing chaos that has been my life for the past few years went, I knew it was time to throw in the towel. I wish I had the energy to sell my wardrobe, and I'll try to list what I can, but I'll probably leave most of it for my family to deal with after I'm gone.

>>10898115
Please don’t make any rash decisions anon

>>10898115
I wish I could do/say something to cheer you up but I know I'm just a stranger without a face to you.
Still I'd like to say I hope you feel better and hopefully find joy in or outside the fashion.

>>10898115
I left lolita a long time ago for some of those reasons, and it took me many years before I got back to it. I regret it now and see it as lost time. My advice is: don't make any decisions about your lolita wardrobe, just let it sit there for the time being. Go to therapy ASAP, because these problems that you are experiencing with lolita fashion have nothing to do with lolita fashion itself, they are just symptoms of problems you have, and they will pop up again eventually if you get a different hobby. Take a break from lolita fashion whilst you go to therapy. Do not get pressured into selling anything by anyone.

>>10898115
pick up a new hobby and get lost in it. no point in offing yourself since you might miss out on stuff that hasn’t happen yet. personally I’m waiting for the gov to stop being a bitch and hiding the fact that aliens are amongus

>>10898115
oh if you’re still feeling sudoku you should sell your wardrobe to buy gears. then plan out a last ditch raid on Area 51 while live streaming to see how far you can get. those mofos been hiding stuff from us for way too long

>>10898115
I'm sorry to hear about how you're feeling. Pack up all your stuff you "want to sell," put it in plastic bins, put it out of your sight somewhere for a while because this is likely your depression talking. When things inevitably get better, you'll be in the headspace to make those kinds of decisions. It's hard to like even your own hobbies when you're depressed. In the meantime spend more time with friends or family, see a doctor to make sure you're physically well, go outside, pick up a simple productive hobby like cycling or something etc. I know some people are are going to seethe at this part but you should try attending a church and talking to people there. Lots of them offer free counseling, too. Good luck

>>10898275
Nayrt, and I don't think people would seethe at the church suggestion. But they would probably wonder why (if anon isn't religious) you would send her to a church, even if it's just for "free" counselling.
My family is religious and involved in church work/charity/etc. If anyone were to come to church to get counselling, they would firstly assume this person has some interest in religion and perhaps joining the church, and if that wasn't the case they would help you in their own religious way and on top of that also hope you would join the church (which is just more pressure you don't need when you're already struggling with mental health). Now I'm not saying they are wrong for doing that, but church people aren't a good substitute for a real licensed therapist. Church people are no more qualified to give advice on mental health than any random person on the street. And that is assuming you get lucky and don't simply get told that depression doesn't exist and you should just pray.

If the therapy/counselling needs to be free of cost anon should search for programs near her that offer it, and from actual licensed therapists. Or she could just pay for the sort of therapy she's comfortable with.

>>10898115
Please don't do anything rash and go to therapy if you can. Take a break from lolita and put your wardrobe in storage. I felt the same way as you not so long ago, lolita was my whole life but made me feel horrible. I never felt good enough, my wardrobe never felt good enough. I was developing a spending problem and every time I lost an auction or missed a listing the FOMO made me feel like I was going to die. I had spent so much time and money on my wardrobe then all of a sudden my brain decided to tell me I looked like shit in all of it. I hated my life. So I decided to quit the fashion completely. I never got around to selling most of my stuff because I was too lazy.

Eventually I realised I probably had severe depression and some form of untreated OCD that was making me feel this way and If it wasn't lolita it would've been something else. I did some serious work on myself and later found my way back to lolita with a much healthier mindset. Luckily my wardrobe was still there when I felt better. There are still times I struggle with those bad feelings coming back but I'm better equipped to deal with them now and I can find joy in lolita again. You might end up not wanting to wear it again and that's okay too. But that's a decision to make later when you are feeling stronger mentally. Don't do anything crazy. I promise there is more out there to live for.

>>10893590
Message the FB, ask if there's a discord. If it's jsut dead, you can make one.

>>10893807
I met a girl like this off 4chan last year, we're still good friends but unfortunately a relationship probably wouldnt work out

otherwise things are alright, i'm excited for otakon to roll around because some of my online frens are gonna come with me, and I'm planning a resident evil cosplay for it. I might also go to katsucon but idk
>>10893525
holy based

>>10897878
I have a polaroid of myself, I will sign it and sell it to you for 20 dollars

Intrusive thoughts about cutting up my Moitie

>>10898834
do it. you know you want to

>begin to do 'masked men' cosplay aka call of duty stuff and ghostface
>never spoke with so many girls my whole life who are DEFINITELY interested in me, because of the costume but not just because of the costume

why is that

>find dress I've been searching for on mercari for ¥9,999
>SS couldn't get it because seller deleted the listing seconds after I submitted my order
>maybe they made a mistake in the listing and they'll put it back up
>relisted a few hours later for ¥5,555 and sells in less than 2 minutes
>Hmm. I wonder if I'll see it on fril in a few days
3 days pass
>listed on fril for ¥17,999
It's not even a popular dress

>>10899021
It's because you're ugly and wearing a mask made you less self conscious and therefore more genial. not rocket surgery chuddy. Also--pls kill urself

>>10899086
this man gets women talking to him and you tell him to die
c'mon don't be jealous

>>10899090
Who exactly do you think you're responding to right now?

>>10899073
May I ask what dress it is?

>>10899090
>this man gets women talking to him
I mean, it was obviously a fake story anyway.

>>10899113
Lose weight.

>>10893410
>started cosplaying two years ago
>went as an Overwatch character
>had lots of fun, want to keep cosplaying
>the big news announcement about OW2 being a cashgrab comes out
>no longer feel like being associated with Overwatch
>can't think of any other cosplays I want to do, even though I want to keep cosplaying
help

I really want to get into lolita but I hate wearing makeup

>>10899129
cosplay this

>>10893420
I want a normal cosplay girl which seems almost impossible the way how cons are full of gender freaks like the "trans men" and nonbinaries that look exactly like women and dress in feminine cosplays and have long hair but will have a panic attack if you refer to them as a woman

>>10899139
i don't know any lolitas irl that wear any, or if they do, it's so little i can't tell at a glance

tfw no bf who will buy me cosplays in exchange for sexy pics and boyfriend treatment over discord
sigh.

>>10899150
ok who is that I need that

>>10899192
i will buy cosplays to fuck in

>>10893410
>tfw ruined a week's worth of cosplay work in one step
>con next week and zero motivation to bring anything with me now
I hate this hobby.

>>10893410
I thought my brother's gf was wearing skintone tights under her 2B cosplay until I caught a glimpse of her entire pussy. She told me she put tape over it but it fell off. Okay, maybe you should have shaved first?

>>10898011
I think the poster is a guy and wants his parents to stop begging him to get a gf.

>>10899205
Think that's the school uniform from Wonderful Everyday. Google "wonderful everyday kimika" or something for reference images (it's an 18+ visual novel so tread carefully)

I just went back and read some old conversation I had on /cgl/, and I wish this still happened, it seems so distant now. But the threads it happened in no longer happen, and the people who populated the threads are no longer here.

I haven't met my local lolita comm irl yet (been doing the online only thing for years, and wear lolita for special occasions mostly) and will be attending a meetup next month. I was initially just happy to go until something my friend (not a lolita) said a while ago gave me a new anxiety. I know it might sound silly but I'm actually a bit scared that people will meet me and think "wow, she looks so much fatter irl compared to her pictures. I bet she shoops". I personally don't use filters/editing and would hate for people to think I am deceiving them.

My friend (let's call her K) has told me several times I look taller and thinner in my pictures and she made it sound like a neutral comment. I told her I agree I look taller and it's probably because I place the camera 6 feet away and this is the advice I had seen online to avoid "perspective distortion" when taking full body pictures (still don't know much about taking pictures, so it might not even be the right term). Most of my pictures are taken facing the camera head on (no angles that could make me look different), I crop them afterward, and I don't use any filters/editing to make my body and face appear different, that's not personally something I want to do. When I take pictures there are no pictures in the set where I think I look fatter than in the others.

K also only sees me in oversized sweaters/tees (which admittedly make me look like a tube) so she really has no idea about what my body looks like in fitted clothes. The only time she saw me in lolita I was wearing an empire waisted dress. I really don't know if I actually look thinner in my pictures or not, but K seems to think so. I told another friend who knows K, and she told me K is jealous. I'm not convinced it's jealousy. K is slimmer and prettier than me (which has never bothered me, everyone has their strengths and weaknesses) so I don't see why she would be jealous. Anyway, the fear has been planted in me.

>>10899685
cont; I had been thinking about what to do with this. I'm still going to the meet. I have flattering pieces and unflattering pieces, looking big or frumpy isn't something that bothers me. If I wear something flattering K might say/think I chose it because it makes me look my slimmest, if I pick something high waisted K might say/think I chose it to hide my figure. So I might be damned if I do and damned if I don't. It's also a themed meet, it's probably best to pick the pieces that fit the theme best. And try to scrub what K said from my brain. I know people might question if she's a good friend or not, but this is really the only time she has said something that got to me. She usually doesn't comment on my appearance (positively or negatively).

>>10899685
>>10899686
You're letting this girl's offhand comments have way too much power over your self esteem. Either it was a thoughtless comment or she's petty and trying to bring you down, but either way it doesn't really matter. Just wear what feels good to you.

>>10899690
I definitely let it get to me, probably because of my values. The first time she said it she commented on a picture where I wasn't fully facing the camera and she said "oh wow, it's amazing how much slimmer you look when you pose like that and take a picture from a 3/4th angle". The way she said it didn't sound negative, but it sounded like she was trying to tell me (in a polite and indirect way) that the way I photographed myself was deceptive. I personally dislike how fake social media can be, and consider the detrimental effect it can have on people's self esteem so I do think it's important to present myself online in a way that reflects reality.
After that first comment, which I took to heart, almost all of the pictures I took have been from the front, fully facing the camera. I still think I looked great in them. I expected to no longer hear anything from K about it since I thought I fixed it. But afterwards she still said, on two separate occasions, that I looked thinner and taller in my pictures compared to irl. These times there was just nothing she pointed at as the reason why. We've been friends for over a decade so I do tend to value what she says. If the person who said it wasn't a close friend I would have dismissed it and assumed the two last comments came out of jealousy or resentment. K has otherwise been generally supportive so I don't know what else to do since the way I present myself is an accurate reflection of reality ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
If she brings it up again I'll just tell here there's nothing more I can do and that she's free to offer suggestions.

>>10893410
i wanna dress weird like maid outfits in public but i dont have enough different outfits for it work and i dont want to do cosplay or lolita fashion (im a man btw)

>>10899192
I used to do this but then I got bored of her so I stopped

>>10899691
There's really nothing wrong with taking photos that flatter you, it's not like you're shooping yourself. It's as much of a lie as wearing makeup. I'll take your word for it that she's a good friend but honestly those comments are a little iffy even if she doesn't mean them to be. You could try wearing clothes that flatter your form around her more often if you think she just genuinely doesn't know how your body looks.

I want a thermal imaging camera to hunt aliens but they cost so much

i had to return my bidet. it made me feel less manly.

>>10899716
I agree, I don't see what else I could do. I already don't use makeup, filters/editing or posing/angles that improve my appearance in pictures. I wear oversized clothes whenever I'm not wearing lolita (or have to dress formal for an occasion) to hide the fact that I'm not wearing a bra, and I generally find oversized clothes very comfortable and easy to layer because I'm sensitive to the cold. I wear thermal underwear for more than half the year. If she brings it up again I could see if there are any pictures of me in something more fitted, that I haven't taken myself, that I could show her. Or maybe I should just invite her to go do something together when I'm wearing lolita (something that isn't high waisted). Or perhaps some meetup pictures from the coming meetup. And if she keeps saying it afterwards then I'm going to ask her what she recommends I do. It's a little confrontational but if the friendship can't survive that then it was not as strong as I thought.
I told some people close to me what K said, and asked them if she was right but all they said was that they were a bit shocked by her comments and that the pictures were fine, and as mentioned before one friend said she was jealous. None of them literally confirmed or denied it though. Of course they might agree with K but just never tell me because they don't want to hurt my feelings. Thank you for your suggestions, I now have a plan if she ever brings it up again. As for my anxiety about attending the meetup, I'm just hoping it's only K who holds that opinion and if other people think so too then I hope they will at least be polite enough not to bring it up.

>Severe anxiety
>Fight myself over making a phone call to arrange for some important medical exams
>Nervous as hell
>Manage to make the call
>Break down and cry afterwards
This sucks.

>got into lolita a few months ago
>counting whats on the way I now have 15 main pieces
I like everything I got but I feel funny about going so fast

>>10899760
As long as you like everything you bought and you're not getting into financial trouble I don't see the problem. It's pretty normal to buy a lot in the beginning. And if those pieces aren't your taste anymore somewhere down the line you can usually sell them again.
Don't forget to also spend money on blouses, hair accessories, socks and shoes. At some point you're also going to want some outerwear (coats, cardigans, boleros). I'm not saying you're doing this but a lot of beginners get so hyperfocused on buying dresses that they forget about everything else, or try to go for very cheap low quality options for blouses, leg wear, accessories, shoes, etc, treating them as an afterthought instead of something that also deserves attention and money.

>>10898279
If anon is not religious, try a utilitarianism church. It's not for therapy, but for community

does it give you an ick if your partner tried to go to a con in a date and started taking pics of other girls

>>10899837
i have an ntr fetish so no

>>10899766
Thanks for the response anon! Yeah I'm trying to keep balanced with all the needed pieces, I have at least a little of everything you listed and I'm gonna try to expand that over time. I've actually gotten a bunch of hair accessories and had to cut myself off from endlessly accumulating them. For blouses I have a few good ones but it feels somehow harder to find blouses I really like than it is to find dresses. Whenever I see one I like it tends to either be really overpriced or get snapped up so fast, but I see a lot of nice main pieces at decent prices sitting around secondhand for awhile.

>too tall for womens clothing let alone lolita
please just krill me

>>10899843
I bought a rectangle headdress and headbow in every colorway I wanted to have, and I would try to get one with the matching print and colorway after buying a dress with a print. I'm still working on getting bonnets in every colorway and keep an eye out for printed headbows that I'm still missing.

I'm fairly picky about blouses too, luckily btssb has one long sleeved design that I love that they release often so I have a full collection of those but I'm still on the hunt for a short sleeve blouse I love. The ones I have are too classic-sweet. I'm also not happy with my outerwear anymore. And I've been doing this for years. I'll be keeping an eye out for a nice coat.

>>10899848
Do MiA Ozen cosplay.

>>10898279
the church "counselling" also happens to be extremely manipulative too

>>10900014
ayrt and yes I agree

being a midwestlet is suffering

>>10898279
Honestly church counseling is probably better than the majority of therapists who will tell you that you need to change gender or some other modern western bullshit.

>>10900032
this is the laziest bait I've seen in a while. Do better.

>>10900012
i actually really like this idea, thank you. are there any other tall characters I should know? it also double works because my hairs going grey lol

I suck at painting my nails. It keeps chipping, it keeps being lumpy, I smear it everywhere. I feel retarded. I'm doing everything "right" and it still looks like trash.

>>10898011
>>10898022
just go no contact with your parents and you'll never suffer grandkid begging again

>>10900133
aside from the obvious that brand makes a difference, theres a lot you can do to improve technique. you generally want to do 2 coats and then a clear top coat. i leave 10 - 15 minutes between coats. i do pinky in 1 pass, and the other fingers i do the middle then left and right. the IMPORTANT thing is dont go over them again until theyre dry or else it will look like shit.

>>10900137
ella and mila. my technique probably is shit, trying to balance how much polish to have on the brush and I use too many strokes because of that. i bought liquid latex which will help the mess but not the chipping and lumpiness issue. I guess it's a learning curve but I feel so incompetent.

>>10900142
basically i dip the brush, lightly swip one side on the container and then use the opposite side for my nails. mine chip after about a week with a top coat, no avioding that

>>10900145
I'll try that, thanks. I'm chipping at day 4/5 but it might be my fault for banging my hands around too much.

>>10900147
that sounds pretty much normal, unless im unaware of some special technique. i seem to get the same mileage with an undercoat so i dont bother with one. im also cooking a lot and typing 24/7 so im not gentle on them.

actually depends how bad the cippage is, my edges look a bit worn down but its only "chipped" on my fidget nail

>>10900129
Crossbreed Priscilla comes to mind.

Still having dreams about the guy I dated 16 years ago that I still have feelings for. It never ends.

>>10895341
I'm sorry, anon

>>10893995
admitting zoomers are a horrible generation doesn't mean you're saying other generations weren't also bad, but it's impossible not to acknowledge how bad they are. they have so much access to knowledge, yet know the least out of basically any generation. support china despite being heavily woke. have the most information about grooming, yet are the most groomed generation. is the first generation of an era where anyone and everyone will do anything for a slice of efame(i know millenials did this but it is so prominent now) a lot of zoomers trend towards smoking and organized religion, something previous generations tried to move away from. tons of girls are getting OF the day they turn 18. they are the most consumerist, most gullible, most ignorant generation. and i say this as one, i am 22. my entire generation is getting played. one of my friends died on a tiktok video because of a dare, my friend's cousin made CP of herself and almost got kidnapped by people from insta. shit from myspace, even stuff from facebook and insta a decade ago seems so innocent looking at it now. life is a nightmare.

>>10900329
>have the most information about grooming, yet are the most groomed generation
Are you blaming kids for being groomed?

>>10900329
>one of my friends died on a tiktok video because of a dare, my friend's cousin made CP of herself and almost got kidnapped by people from insta
They're both retards.

>>10900329
>tons of girls are getting OF the day they turn 18
What's wrong with that?

>>10900329
>tons of girls are getting OF the day they turn 18
if i was hot id do this (but im not). i dont see any shame in it, apart from not liking porn myself

I saw a group of people wearing jfashion looking clothes, I wish it could have been me. I was already feeling kind of down and this made it worse.

>>10900554
why didn't you strike up a conversation?

>>10900337
I think they're saying their entire generation is retarded. I don't know why you'd pick up on just that part.

>>10900557
It was just three friends doing their thing, it wasn't like it was a huge meetup of a jfashion community. I also didn't recognize it as any specific style, and wouldn't have had anything to talk to them about. At most I'd run up to them and say I like their clothes, then things'd get really awkward and I'd try to disappear.
It's not like their clothes were super weird either though so anyone commenting on them at all may be weird even from a normie point of view.
This is just the tip of the iceberg there are so many reasons why I couldn't talk to them.

>>10900329
Your thread reads like a list of Republican talking points. Anything you just said about boomers is 1000% worse about boomers. It sucks that an 18 year old joins OF, but it's even worse that 30 year olds with Masters in engineering can't get jobs, precisely because of the evil lies of boomers.

It's so fucking funny how jannies on 4chan love to ban you if you complain about Republicans, but will leave this obvious gay Republican propaganda up forever. Fuck off oldfaggot defenders.

>>10900562
No one is talking about boomers you dumbass.

>>10900562
>Your thread reads like a list of Republican talking points.
This is a good thing.

Girls are being pressured into making OF like its the done thing
It seems like every other cosplayer has one
I knopw /cgl/ will slut shame the girls but when you turn 18 and you see all the money others are making its hard to turn down

>>10900568
i think it's less about slut shaming and more about their age. many of these girls are groomed as minors to go into SW when they turn 18 and have little to no life experience to know just what they're getting into. SW is inherently predatory and while it shouldn't be vilified, tactics that make it appealing to very young women should. it's also high investment and low profit most of the time so many girls get into legally grey IRL SW like sugaring which is dangerous for them due to it not being a legal profession in most areas. personally i have nothing against SW but it needs to be legalized for the safety of women involved, especially younger ones. i feel the same way about the weird grooming style marketing of MLMs and the military as well.

>>10900554
I wish I could dress up in techwear without looking like a danger to society. It doesn't help that I'm close to start yelling at people in public.

I mean, people are such assholes when they don't have consequences. Lately multiple drivers won't stop on a red light. I've either been nearly hit or unable to pass because of it. It makes me want to throw rocks at them. And then there's all the tailgaters at the train stations who will come at you either behind you or in front of you sometimes to get past on your dime. I already look a bit atypical. Imagine if I started yelling or shoving dressed as a political extremist urban ninja.

>>10900653
This looks fucking awesome.

>>10900654
this was all the rage in 2013/15 on /fa/. In person wont look as good because that lighting ang photoshop is next level.

>have cosplay I've wanted to do since like 15
>never had the money to go to cons, let alone make a good costume until way, way later
>now too old to do the character unless I do some weird aged up version
>mfw
>also pic related
I guess I could do Kratos instead, I've got the RBF for it...

>>10900565
Complaining about the youths is talking about the olds in abstentia.

>>10900709
No it's not, that's not even what that word means. You don't need to compare age groups to complain about one of them.

>someone finally bought the dress I was debating on even though I shouldn't spend more
I'm sad but relieved

>learning that lolita fashion is clearly inspired by/connected to the lolicon boom in the 80s which started out as a lewis carroll inspired version of girlhood fetishism rather than the pedoshit it is now
knowing japanese really makes this super obvious.

>>10900852
clarisse from lupin was the original "loli" and she certainly doesn't look underage. this tracks.

>>10900568
>being pressured
oh right, all those mafiosas holding guns to their heads making them create an OF, right?
fuck off, "wanting to make a lot of easy money" is not being pressured
it's 2024, women have more rights than men, they can take fucking responsibility for the first time in history

>>10900860
yes exactly. the original defining features of a "loli" were damsel in distress in nature and not being a child. and the term evolved into what is now bishoujo pretty soon afterwards. it was basically the aesthetic of ero-kawa than it was just plain porn. a lot of early lolicon stuff used fairytale characters as well. you can definitely see why lolita would have more than just a named connection to it.

>>10900877
I think most people here don’t want to admit this since there was still a fetishism/eroticism involved even if it wasn’t actually manifesting In porn

>>10900897
well of course, many people in the lolita community are prudish and knee-jerk about lolita being connected to anything erotic at all. it's just stupid how angry people get about it when the connections are all very obvious.

>>10900903
I forget which ones but seen some blogs where people basically talk about this but still play dumb about it for some reason. Like "I don't understand why the way they use the word lolita was different in the 80s?" or "I guess we'll never really know where the name came from!"

>>10900905
yes and you can read in blogs and that the first usage of the name is from an issue of ryuko tsushin in 87 and was "related to the romanticized image of the 'shoujo' during the time period". it's not hard to understand, it came from lolita complex at a time when lolicon meant fetishizing alice and wonderland and not being sexually interested in anime children.

>>10900877
back in 1985 we already had magazines on "loli" and "lolicon" featuring 2d child. I don't know what you're trying to say here by bringing up erokawa, which came much later.

>>10900905
Nayrt, by the time "lolita" started being used for fashion (when it comes to fashion it was initially used as a term for frilly feminine fashion in general) it had no sexual meaning when used to refer to fashion. The term had gone through some changes in meaning and use before then.
>>10900907 is correct

>>10900917
please look up information from japanese sources.

>>10900919
it's not about whether lolita did or didn't have a sexual meaning, it's that the meaning of lolita comes from lolita complex directly which is something the community tends to deny.
>>10900917
erokawa as in the term, not the fashion. lolicon was considered the first instance of eroticized cuteness in japan.

>>10900905
>>10900903
I don't know why anybody cares any more. It maybe mattered 15 years ago when normies didn't know lolita and we didn't want to be seen as perverts, but it's pretty accepted nowadays and most people don't question the name as it clearly has little to do with the fashion today.

>>10900920
You're making the claim, YOU produce the source, nonce.

>>10900921
I agree. It's more like the lolita complex had a more vague and encompassing meaning then which included the aesthetic trappings and abstract ideas of girlhood. Compared to nowadays where it's pretty much solely used to mean pedos

>>10900924
you interjected in someone else's discussion, you should have some knowledge of what you're discussing before you disagree with them. no one is responsible for educating you. it doesn't benefit discussions to spoonfeed.

>>10900929
I'm not even that poster you fucking retard, I'm just calling out your bullshit.

>>10900930
you're disproportionately angry at the suggestion that someone do their own research.

>>10900922
>but it's pretty accepted nowadays and most people don't question the name as it clearly has little to do with the fashion today.
i just thought it was interesting. also some people ITT who are getting pissed off about the discussion clearly care.

>>10900927
exactly. i don't care one way or the other if people acknowledge it, but i think it sucks that some people vilify the acknowledgment of history.

>>10900921
first anon here. iirc the term "lolita" (which has gone through some changes in meaning/usage over time) and "lolita complex" are both based on the novel "lolita". Afaik different uses/meanings of the term "lolita" eventually lead to it being used to refer to frilly feminine fashion, which then lead to it being used to refer solely to 90s lolita fashion. IIRC lolita fashion did indirectly get its name from the book (if you go back in time and look at different usages of the term "lolita" it will eventually lead you back to the book), but isn't based on "lolita complex". More accurately both "lolita fashion" and "lolita complex" have a common ancestor; the novel "lolita".
There's a very thoroughly researched article that you can find on the lolita research fb group that outlines the timeline of different usages of the term "lolita" and illustrates it with scans and translations of different magazines. Also, if I am not mistaken, the usage of the term "lolita" for fashion predates the release of the 90s movie, so this suggests that lolita fashion did not get its name from the movie.

It's been a while since I read the articles so if you need to know for sure please go over to that fb group and look up the articles.

>>10900927
pretty much, yeah-- early "lolicon" was more about the "pure/innocent maiden" trope than anything (interesting considering one of lolitas precursor fashions was otome kei) some perverts obviously existed, but it wasn't universal. a lot of the tropes the more SFW definition celebrated carried over to the later moe boom and bishoujo trope as well. language always evolves, especially when it comes to colloquialisms. i don't think it matters if the fashion is or isn't named after an archaic definition of a now-crude term.

>>10900965
This is actually what's incorrect though, that's the entire point. The term for the fashion came directly from the term lolita complex and was inspired by the term when it was about innocent, cute teenage and preteen girls and not younger children. The book Lolita was translated into Japanese in a more whimsical and less overtly sexual manner than the book is in other languages, this has been discussed previously at length. Research groups of people within the fashion are never going to accurately make connections as much as scholars and people outside the community without a bias. Is it so hard to believe that terms change over time?

>>10901002
I think its more likely that they were picking up on how the narrator in Lolita waxes poetic and romanticizes everything about young girls than "the translation was so whimisical and pure"

>>10901004
You must not know Japanese then, there are tons of resources on the butchered Japanese translation of Lolita. If you don't know I suggest doing a bit of research on the topic so you'll be more informed.

>>10901002
>when it was about innocent, cute teenage and preteen girls and not younger children.

preteens are young children. Modern lolis are prepubescent children (that's just another way of saying pre teen).
I wouldn't be bothered if the term lolita fashion was based on lolita complex, I just don't think it is.

>Research groups of people within the fashion are never going to accurately make connections as much as scholars and people outside the community without a bias.

The person who wrote that timeline is a scholar, and she's working together with an older japanese lolita from the japanese lolita community doing research into lolita history. If that's still too much bias for you so be it.

>Is it so hard to believe that terms change over time?
I said that it had changed though, multiple times in fact. Please read properly.

>>10901007
damn you sound insufferable

>>10901016
nta but preteen generally means 11-14(tweens) and most loli characters are 10 and younger, even in mainstream media(think dragon maid). i kind of doubt a lot of what you're saying also, and i think anons point is that even a scholar working with older japanese lolitas will have a bias, especially japanese lolitas who trend away from anime and lolicon related inspiration. if you read some things about lolicon's origins and how influential it was to shoujo manga and feminist mangas at the time (like urusei yatsura) you'll understand the connection better in my opinion. i feel like a lot of modern lolitas have done a lot to try to scrub the term's origins and meaning to simply being related from the book, but it's much deeper when you look at the bigger picture.

>>10901018
Better than sounding like an ignorant American.

>>10901025
if you actually know japanese you would have replied to that anon in japanese you phony

>>10901028
why didn't you respond in japanese, soup? you gay?

>>10901023
>even a scholar working with older japanese lolitas will have a bias

There's just one minor hurdle though. Where are you going to find a scholar who isn't a lolita themselves, who is interested enough in it to learn enough about it to also do the research into the history of it? Seems to me you have to love a topic to invest that much time and effort into it, this would open the door to bias as well.

The resource I talked about already suggested the term lolita fashion was based on the name of the novel, so they're obviously not afraid to acknowledge ties to the novel. I don't see how protesting and saying "it's not based on the novel, it's based on the term lolita complex" makes it any more or any less gross than believing it's based on the novel and that the term lolita (fashion) and lolita complex have a common ancestor. No matter what you believe the novel is still at the root of it. Anyone who is invested (biased) into proving the novel isn't related at all would give up at that point. Anyone left over, who isn't bothered by the idea that it's all ultimately based on the novel, would highly likely feel no better or worse about it if their research lead to it being based on lolita complex instead.

>>10901038
i aint a weeb but bitches aint shit

>>10895513
I have a friend like this, 33 but her half-Asian genetics somehow make her look like an 11 year old white girl, and I'm pretty sure she actually has some kind of reverse lolicon fetish because she really plays into it. Not only does she dress and style herself really young, she's also gone to extremes to permanently remove any trace of body hair, she's got a history of dating much older guys, and she's made some very questionable comments about the age of consent, age gaps in dating, etc.
I think it's kind of a daddy issues thing, I tend to attract girls who were raised by single dads and I think subconsciously see me as a surrogate, but she's definitely the most extreme case.

>>10901119
>I tend to attract girls
Aaand you lost me.

My gf who I thought loved me just came out as asexual. I am heartbroken.

>>10901140
Not being horny doesn't mean she doesn't love you. Still sucks though.

>>10901140
That means she's not sexually attracted to anyone. It doesn't mean she doesn't love you. It doesn't necessarily mean she won't be willing to do anything sexual with you either. Some asexuals are repulsed by sex whilst others aren't. I recommend you both talk about the details and see if there is a way you can both be happy in the relationship moving forward.

>>10901141
It's not about libido. Asexuality is a lack of sexual attraction towards anyone.

>>10901138
Well I don't necessarily mean relationships or sex (neither is a thing with the girl in question), just them winding up in my life in one way or another.

>>10901141
>>10901150
don't bother, it's some strange troll that posts weird shit about how asexuality is the devil

>>10900933
It's fine to think it's interesting, but some people seem to care a little too much, like it proves something about the fashion or ruins it for them.

>>10901177
Nayrt but yes, the origins of the name of the fashion shouldn't make or break the fashion for anyone. If it makes someone really happy to learn the term came from the book then that's creepy, if someone would leave the fashion behind after learning the term came from the book then that's weak and lame as well.

The origins of the term have no impact on the everyday enjoyment of the fashion. It would be the same if the fashion had another name.

I'm looking forward to the next con where I'll finally have an opportunity to wear lolita again. I've also gotten a new blouse so it'll be a new look, which is also exciting.
Too bad the con experience itself will be horrible, like always, and I'll be completely alone and barely say a word to anyone, and the con doesn't have much interesting to do either. At least last year they had some good food at a decent price, so there's that.

>>10901239
Isn't it easier to just find other places to wear lolita to, like family gatherings, meetups of your local lolita community, etc?
Why force yourself to go to a convention if you don't enjoy the convention experience?

>>10901239
Also confused as to why you're even going there in the first place, if it's always a horrible experience for you. Find somewhere else to wear lolita.

>>10901150
My gf is repulsed by sex unfortunately. I might just kill myself. I’m so hurt that the one I love so much didn’t enjoy making love with my soul this whole time, and even found it repulsive. She’s acting like I hurt her, as if she’s not the one who lied about loving me.

>>10901155
>t. asexual sociopathic bitch who can’t feel love

I wish I had an imouto.

>>10901242
Nayrt but I wouldnt be surprised if the anons family didn’t approve of lolita or something happened at their local comm that made them leave/not want to join. But even I live in a rural area and can still find places to wear lolita.

Why do normalfags think anything thats not jeans/leggings and an ugly t-shirt is fancy, I'm so sick of getting comments about how fancy I'm dressed. I get it for lolita, but just wearing normal casual skirts and tops that look remotely nice is enough to bring out the "why are you so dressed up" comments.

>>10901460
It's outside of what they think the social norm is, and that makes them uncomfortable.

>>10901460
I get this as a guy too. I wear pretty casual stuff, dark straight-cut jeans, casual button-ups with the sleeves rolled up, etc., and I get a hard time from friends all the time about being "overdressed," people telling me I dress too old for my age (I'm 37!) and so on.
One thing I've noticed is that some people seem to take it personally, like by wearing more than just the most basic graphic tee and black jeans you're somehow insinuating that the way they dress isn't good enough, or whatever.

>was gonna ask an Ankha cosplayer to dance at the rave
>as I was walking up another guy appeared and started dancing with her instead

I was too slow

>>10901239
Same here except I'm going to put together some closet cosplay and talk to whoever I can

>>10901483
I hope he was dressed as Char Aznable.

>con next week
>have to pay some stuff
>also blew my money on Onlyfans, again...
>doesn't look like, I get at keast one day free for the con

Only good thing is, I could get back some money...

>>10901334
I have one
It's ok...

>>10901583
never understood why people waste money on OF when they could support a god gamer like k3soju with a twitch sub

>>10901583
Porn is free anon

>>10901716
I do both (more Fansly than OF) but only basic subs and never donations or extra-cost content or anything. I have pretty specific taste and when I find somebody making lewd stuff that's exactly what I'm into it's worth paying $5-10 a month to get a steady feed of it and encourage more.

>>10901716
I like giving girls money.

>>10901725
dare I ask what specific taste that is? you goonmaxxing? i dont keep up with the meta im a teemo first pick no matter is it's s tier or f tier ya smell me gang
>>10901726
it's a better vice than being a nic fiend or alcoholic ig

I will continue to post about con karaoke's with bad setups until something's done about it. Lyrics face the singer, NOT the crowd. This shouldn't be too hard to understand. And then there's also the ones who make the mic too loud and the music so low that I can barely hear it, or the fags who still insist on only allowing awful MIDI instrumentals made over 20 years ago

>>10901741
ideal setup is to have the lyrics perpendicular to the singer and the crowd, so the crowd's view of the singer isn't blocked by a screen, but the singer isn't having to awkwardly turn around to see the lyrics

>try on new dress I ordered
>looks like it fits
>can't zip up the back
pain

>>10901732
>dare I ask what specific taste that is? you goonmaxxing?
Exhibitionism, can't be staged and the girl's gotta seem genuinely into it. Petite slender cute girls. Ideally the two categories combine. Massive bonus points if cosplay is involved.
I don't do the goon thing or even edge intentionally or anything, just a regular fap in the morning so I can get on with my day.

>>10901759
the seam ripper is calling

>>10901778
I think it could probably fit with mild alteration but I know nothing about altering clothes and am scared to try anything

>>10901782
what dress is it and how much do you need added?

>>10901796
Pic related. Its a catherine cottage OP so I did know it there was some risk with sizing, but everything seemed to check out with size except the sleeve cuffs are too tight around my arms. I think the tightness there is keeping the fabric from being able to reach all the way around since I feel it pulling there when I try.
There seems to be a lot of extra fabric inside the seem of the sleeve, so if I knew what I was doing it could possibly be adjusted looser without needing extra fabric? Can't be entirely sure it would fix the overall problem though

>>10901759
Lose weight and it will fit

>>10901804
if there's enough seam allowance and you only need a little added, you should be able to let it out without having to add any fabric.

>>10901831
Good to know, thanks anon. I don't really know how to do that safely for the dress but I'll look into it

If I cosplay as the Weeknd am I gonna be expected to do a dance move?
Should I learn some? Because I'm absolutely awful at it

>>10901840
Take it to a tailor. It'll be relatively cheap for a small adjustment. And if you don't know where to start you will just damage your dress

>>10893420
Probably the same...

>>10900129
>are there any other tall characters I should know
The giantess from Nanatsu no Taizai???
(I forgot her name)

Man I could go for a little girl right now. Just hug her with one hand on her head. Tell her how adorable she is. Maybe pinch her cheek gently. Tickle her. Protect her. Make her smile. I really want to become a dad.

>>10901929
Depends...

Currently at a convention
Doesn't look like, I get a gf this time either...

>>10902409
Convention is over

While I wasn't able to get a gf this time either (surprise, surprise) I was at least able to tell a Yuno Gasai cosplayer that I would be happy to cosplay as Yuki for her
(Too bad, she already had her own "Yuki")

>>10901244
>>10901242
I would be going to the convention even if I wasn't wearing lolita. But it is something I think about, why do I even go to conventions when it's almost always a bad experience.
But it isn't literally bad only all the time, I do have some moments that are good at some conventions, that could be part of it, and it's also not like I have much else, so going to a convention is at least something to do.

And whether I can wear lolita to other places, I'm thinking about if I should try wearing it as regular clothes in my normal life sometime, however for the past months it's been way to cold outside to wear it as clothes, and it's still too cold so I'll need the more "weird clothes" setting of a convention to have an excuse to wear something that really isn't suitable for the weather at all, I feel like.

The con I've been looking forward to is the next weekend, I hope it surprises me even if it may not be likely. I can't even imagine what good could happen, I guess it is that I meet someone that I can spend the con with but is that even possible, it never happens anymore. Or at least that I meet someone that I can have a good conversation with that lasts for a while.

>>10902503
Just get a warm coat and some thermal tights?

I love how much lolita flatters my bust. Western clothes always expect me to be way bigger and usually hide my chest even in the smallest sizes unless I’m wearing tight clingy fabric. But lolita and jfashion clothes actually fit and frame my chest well without being tight or trashy looking and I feel so elegant and feminine

Ko tenda ha’e che inodoro ko’áĝa.