/cgl/ - Cosplay & EGL

>>10324459
Probably more of the usual, but like, what sort of meets do people want these days? I feel like most people are over it. Might as well just hang with friends unless it is ILD...

>>10324459
Made a resolution to just hang with friends more. Meets are getting less fun, more itas, more drama, people getting slack with the rules and dress codes. No thanks.
If I could say what kind of meets, I’d probably say I’d like to return to tea party and cafe meets, with minimum dress code as a full lolita coordinate and any plus ones dressed nicely at least. That would be good enough.

>>10324469
>return to tea party and cafe meets
What has your comm been doing if not that?

>>10324459
Just more of the usual "meet up, go to a restaurant, chat with randoms". We don't really have anything else here.

>>10324562
Best not to ask, all kinds of lol so randumb shit. Edgy activities that are just stupid nerd stuff, no need to dress lolita and call it a meet. I’m a grumpy bitch, I just like my tea and chat.

Girl in my comm is charging $10 for entry to a swap meet at her apartment. 21 people are already marked as going, so I kind of wish I'd thought of this scam first.

>>10324603
Is it for a conference space in the building or something? I've paid to help cover the fees for that before.

>>10324459
>Doing
Tea and photos

>What I would rather they do
Art galleries, museums, pop up events

>>10324607

I checked and the building management requires a refundable deposit, so short of someone trashing the place it's essentially free.

>>10324570
I asked because I want to know.. But i understand if you don't want to out your comm

>>10324570
Same here. I think it’s backlash against all the high tea meets we used to have but it really feels like people are trying way too hard to seem lolrandom and non-lovely. Trampoline parks, paintballing and karaoke in crappy bars without even a private room. Then when someone tries to organize a regular tea meet people whine about how boring it is to just sit down and talk. But according to the pictures nobody even wore full lolita to the trampoline or paintball meets so doesn’t that defeat the purpose of a lolita meetup? By all means have fun playing paintball with your friends but what’s the point of making it a lolita meetup if you don’t wear lolita to it?

>>10324616
It could be that there are other costs that you arent aware of. If she is buying decorations or food or anything really it will need some money.

>>10324617
Basically things like >>10324630 said. With same result, people not even wearing full coords, and if they do, the most boring casual of casual. And bringing plus ones who don’t even dress up much less wear JFashion.
My boyfriend likes my fashion so I’ll just plan more dates, and wear it more just when I feel like it as well. Maybe just go if the comm has a good plan for ILD, but stop expecting something lovely. My comm isn’t very lovely. And yes I’m crabby and disappointed about it but I’m trying to adjust my own expectations, not shit on them directly. And to just plan to do my own thing in lolita.

>>10324603
>>10324616
Please fuck off. Why should this person be responsible for other people possibly damaging the area? Why should she alone pay a deposit?

Also you dont even know what other things she is planning for this, like food, maybe renting extra tables and chairs. I hate when people who clearly dont plan events want to whine about a pathetic charge for something they should be free.

I have charged money for meets in free spaces because I buy food, goodie bags, activities, crafting supplies, etc. Just because you can go to a space for free doesnt mean that putting on an event is absolutely cost less.

>>10324603
What do you mean "scam" poorfag? 10$ to fix drinks and food for everyone; lending your place to a bunch of members from a community that are not your best friends? shameful

I wish the other gothic lolitas in my comm were also actual goths so we could go to synthwave events together. I'm so jealous of the Ontario comm!

>>10324730
I wished I had a Lolita friend (any substyle desu, but goth or old school = best) that would go to Therion concerts or metal festivals with me. Mega jelly of the Ontario comm too anon.

my comm had a vote for a new mod and the mod running it only let it stay open for 24 hours and didnt link it in the page or announce it more. so her best friend is now the other mod, so we have 2 bitchy girls in charge. i want to move.

>>10324760
Yeah that was ridiculous. Should've been up at the very least for a week. My vote went to AJ.

>>10324743
>>10324730
I've seen lolitas from my comm at metal and visual kei concerts but unfortunately I don't want to be friends with them, so I end up going alone but still wearing lolita

What are your experiences with meets in the evening? Any do's and don't's?

>>10324859
Lolitas always need an outfit shot so make sure there is a well lit space for it or bitches get cranky

>>10324859
Here is us take on it: People sometimes bitch if the dinner menu in a nice place is more expensive than for the usual lunch or tea meet, but the people who do come out seem to dress nicer. It’s much easier to ‘meet for drinks, then decide on dinner from there’ if you want a convenient excuse to make the meet 21+.
Evening meets seem to draw fewer itas for some reason too? By location in sure ymmv.

>>10324866
My comm is not like that. The ones who care about efame take their coord pics at home with a tripod

>>10324743
I have a friend like this but she moved several states away. Feels bad.

>>10324866
Same as >>10324869
We might sometimes take a group shot on a nice day if the place seems good for that or on ILD, but who stands about at a meet handing off cameras for coord shots? You really don’t see that.

>>10324760
>>10324767
Mods hardly matter in a comm. Don't worry about it.

>>10324874
Interesting, in my comm its a big thing in meetups on making photos of everyone, but we are a smaller comm.

>>10324874

Not my comm, but I once went to a meetup with several infamous people and they did exactly that. Literally just stood off by themselves and took photos the entire time. It happens, thankfully not that much though, and they're usually people you should be ignoring anyways.

>>10324874
The lolitas in my comm who have a lot of presence on Instagram do it, but the majority doesn't. I don't really get it, seems much more comfortable to take the picture at home if you want to document your coords. It's awkward when the rest of us have to wait for them.

>>10324730
Same anon! There's one or two girls in my comm who wear gothic lolita but they're really just the type to think wearing black, liking Halloween, and listening to metal (????), makes them goth. A lolita friend to hit up the local goth nights with would be great.

>>10324669
She specifically said it's for the room. Buying decorations for a 2 hour swap meet don't really make sense.

>>10324722
It's certainly not for tables. Good job on all that empty speculation, though.

@10324725
You don't get a (you).

>>10324912
Then don’t be a puss, if you are goin to drag her in here for it, at least have the balls to ask her why she’s charging ‘for the venue’ when organizing a meet at her apartment?

>>10324893
>>10324899
This is super rude.

>>10324892
If all of you enjoy it together, that’s different.

>>10324912
Why should she have to cover the security deposit from her own purse? If I hosted a swap meet in a venue, I’d ask everyone to chip in to cover the deposit cost - I’m not paying for someone else to trash the room.

If you don’t like it, don’t go.

>>10324874
My comm easily spends an hour taking each other’s coord shots every single meet. When a host hasn’t taken this into consideration people complain and may leave the meet early to take photos. This happens even if it’s just four of us at a cafe. Hosts of bigger meets are usually expected to have picked out a suitable location in advance.

I rarely take photos of myself so I always end up standing around awkwardly to the side or having other people’s phones shoved in my hands to take their photos.

>>10324925
Those deposits are refunded afterwards, her charges to attendees don’t seem to be.

>>10324927
This does not sound like very much fun at all. I’ve visited 5 comms traveling around and I have not had this happen, maybe I’ve just been lucky.

>>10324909
Maybe they would enjoy goth night if you took the stick out of your ass and decided to ask them to go

>>10324603
>Anonymous
Maybe ask her where the funds are going instead of talking shit behind her back before knowing, super ungrateful, you make the swap meet for your comm next time

>>10324956
I've tried to show them the music and they had no interest in it, only in wearing the label. You sound upset, did I strike a nerve?

>>10324974
In my comm lolitas go to goth night if they’re invited even if they don’t know a lot about it, so I find your whinging very annoying.

The cover fee isn't a scam?
Just because it's being held in the building she lives in, doesn't automatically mean it's in her apartment. It's a venue the building rents out and she has to pay for that out of pocket. She doesn't get the deposit back period.
Also, speaking on behalf of the Christmas meet she organised, she paid for all the food and drinks, as well as commissioning goodie bags for those who attended. Talking to her I found out she lost close to $400 for that meet and you still want to call her a scammer?
How about you try hosting a meet in a venue that charges for the room, while providing for those who attended.
If you don't like the small fee then don't attend. It's not like the other swap meets also haven't asked for an attendance fee.

>>10324987
It's hardly whining and I'm not the only one wanting the same thing, but ok.

>>10325001
You clearly did strike a nerve lol.

>>10324966
>>10324925
There's always a salty bitch from the comm posting in these threads over pretty much nothing. They probably don't even come to any meets, just sit at home all day being angry that other people are having fun, living their life.

>>10324630
all of this sounds so fun to me, but I suppose I haven't been over saturated with it

>>10324874
It seems to vary from meet to meet in my comm. Sometimes people definitely want photos and others don't and then there are groups who don't take any photos, and some that all take photos.

I go to all meets regardless of who is going and whether there will be photos or not. But I'm always sad when we go to a cute place and don't get any photos of people, just food or the place itself.

>>10325016
Nayrt, but goth is an actual subculture and not just a fashion. I’m not surprised a goth wants to hang out with actual goths at a goth event

>>10324459
my comm seems to be planning a lot of events but not really stuff i want to attend. i put a lot of effort into planning meets last year but it felt unappreciated.

>>10324760
>only let it stay open for 24 hours
The comm isn't that big and the voting was online. You're not voting in person at a polling place like a national or state-wide election.
>didnt link it in the page or announce it more
The link was directly on the album with the applicants and their descriptions. The album was up for nearly a week. That's plenty of time to decide who to vote on. Stop trying to start bullshit because the person you and >>10324767
voted for didn't win.
That person has no presence in the community, including meeting up in person or commenting on posts in the group.
>2 bitchy girls in charge
we have 4 mods total now, it's not like the two you're salty about are running the whole comm.
>i want to move.
Nobody is making you stay in the comm. I honestly doubt you're even an active member so you leaving won't affect us whatsoever. You're clearly only there because you want to start drama. Please do the comm a favor and gtfo.

>>10324743
>>10324801
>>10324909
We should all pack up our lives and move to Cardiff or something.

>>10324956
Anon, asking them to go isn't going to automatically make them enjoy the music or the atmosphere. I don't want to force people to go somewhere they won't have fun! Also a lot of the girls in my comm are really sheltered and would probably be uncomfortable around alt fashion that isn't frills and kawaii makeup. I remember seeing a few gasping at a heavily pierced dude we saw downtown once and sparked a whole conversation comparing his bravery with the courage it took to wore Lolita. It was a big yikes.

>>10324730
European comms have way more goth lolitas than the western comms.

>>10325049
Have you considered hanging out with actual goths if you want to spend time with goths? Why do you expect lolitas to fit into the goth box? Lolita already has popular music, lifestyle attributes, and subculture of its' own.

>>10325172
Just let me have my wishful dream for twinning in poofy dresses while dancing to Echo and the Bunnymen.

>>10325166
I am confused by the fact that you don’t include Europe in “western” ahahaha. Guessing it’s a typo?

>>10324885
Nayrt but in tne same comm maybe, but the mod who ran the vote liked to brag that other comms were "inviting her to run successful meets" and that it gave her the "incentive to run a con tea party" etc and acts stuck up about it. I don't disagree with you but because she has connections the other lolitas worship the ground she walks on. It's annoying to watch. I go to just the big meet every year and it's embarasing to see her soaking in the clout

>>10325175
You sound like you'd fit in where I live.
Where are you anon? I love Echo and the Bunnymen, Duran Duran, Depeche Mode, and Oingo Boingo.

>>10325204
Top tier taste, anon. I live in western Canada but plan to move to the U.S. later this year.

>>10325117
My point is if all you do is assume that no one else will wanna hang out and participate rather than just asking then you have no business complaining.

>>10325016
Idk what nerve you are talking about, I don’t have a problem finding lolitas to do goth nights with lol

>>10325214
Last year I proposed we going as a group to local annual goth picnic but there was no interest, so it's not as if my assumption was without precedent! I'm not complaining, just wishing. And I'm glad you have better luck for those sorts of events!

>>10325215
nayrt but you can tell you seem a bit stuck up just from reading the thread. you seem to have a sense of "us and them". make less assumptions and maybe you will make more friends!

>>10325223
There might be an 'us and them' sentiment, but I don't feel above anyone, just smol and alone in my tastes! I have lolita friends, and I have goth friends, but wish I had some that overlapped like I do.

>>10325223
I didn't get that impression from their posts at all? Not every post on this board needs to be read with an undertone of salt and malice.

>>10325175
I'm a gothic Lolita and I would love to go to goth events instead of normie bars but because I don't care about music I don't know where/when they are. I love dancing though. You could introduce people in your comm to those places but you sound like you look down on the gothic lolitas in your comm so I'm not sure they would want to go you.

>>10325240
There are multiple gothposters anon.

>>10325214
>>10325223
Where on Earth did you get that? Anon/s have already said they asked their comm members if they were interested in the music and they weren't, so why would they drag them to a place where that's the focus?
You sound like a nerve was struck because you weren't "so annoyed" until it was mentioned that people wanted to hang out with, for lack of a better phrase, "real goths".

>>10325254
>until it was mentioned that people wanted to hang out with, for lack of a better phrase, "real goths".
>until
You mean in the beginning of the conversation?

>>10325254
>>10325267
No one said gothic lolitas were fake goths.

>>10324730
I like synthwave, but don’t wear goth. Honestly I wish I had friends to go to a synthwave concert with, would be so fun. You should ask your comm friends anyways, since if one of them asked me to go to pretty much any concert I’d say yes.

>tfw I just want to do fun stuff and dress up

>>10324730
>goth
>synthwave

>>10325240
I didn't mean to give that impression! Read >>10325227 and in my first post I used the word "also" because I'm not saying they're fake or anything! Just that there are two similar things, and I would love to have a group that were both.

>>10325295
Was sleepy, meant darkwave. But also have a pretty vast library of synthwave. I listen to a lot of genres!

How much would you pay for a tea party meet without special guests but with alcohol?

>>10325117
Welsh lolita here. Why... Why Cardiff?

>>10324467
>what meets do people want
Refined ones which are followed by a drunken afterparty

>>10324459
Ah, genius, this way you can look through fb for events that match people's replies to this thread and file them away for potential doxxing purposes

>>10325338
"this is going in my girls that post to 4chan folder hehehehehe"

>>10325342

>>10325315
It depends on the reviews,I would probably pay 50-100 euro if I like the place

>>10325338
Spoken like a true larper.

>>10325371
I wish we had more people like you in our comm. €15 for a High tea is already too much in my comm and you cannot find proper ones anywhere near that price.

>>10325392
In my comm I sometimes organise really nice ones and only 1-3 people show up but I don't care

>>10325267
Sure but not until >>10324909 mentioned specifics, which honestly just makes the person who got annoyed fit the description. Why else would it bother them?

>>10325456
meant to put "who got annoyed seem like they fit the description"

>>10325315
I just did a brunch at 45/60 depending on whether you wanted a cocktail. People seemed pretty happy, but the food is really good there.

>>10325338
What, are you going to log all 10+ people that respond to an invite and then... assume all of them are posting? Contact everyone who went to see what happened and how the anons story matches up? This makes no sense. Also most comms are locked groups so you wouldn’t be able to see 90% of these events. Go larp somewhere else

>>10325272
They are, though.

>>10325172
>popular music, lifestyle attributes, and subculture of its' own
No, it really doesn’t

>>10325556
#notallgothiclolitas
You can be goth and be a gothic lolita anon! Just wearing it doesn't make you goth though, I can agree with that.

>>10325567
Shit, I wear sweet and I’m closer to being a goth than a lot of gothic lolitas are. I wouldn’t say I am one, but I hang with a bunch and am very down with the culture and music.

Question for the actual goths in the thread: if a goth invites me to a goth club, should I wear sweet and just be honest about who I am or fake it and wear something gothy. I’m not a fan of being a ~poser~ but I also don’t want to look like I’m antagonizing people when I show up in AP

>>10325570
wear holy lantern or some shit

>>10325571
I honestly want to wear it in pink with that fucking catbat headband but no one would get the meme

>>10325213
>western Canada
hey I'm on the west coast and I've visited western Canada before. Would not mind going back.

pls email if you are interested in meeting up. I'd be into going to Canada again and doing lolita stuff, but also dancing to superior goth music. I've left my throwaway!

>>10325570
I've worn sweet to goth events and people enjoy it.

>>10325573
i've had goths recognize the holy lantern print even though they weren't lolitas themselves, you should do it anon

>>10325570
I'm goth to the max but I love cute shit. I'm sure other goths wouldn't mind seeing you in sweet, and if they do, you can choose to not care or just adjust your attire the next time you go to a similar event

>>10325561
check out this roleplayer

>>10324912
I think $10 entry fee is reasonable to keep any old random from showing up to your house. imo it's not enough.

>>10325175
I don't think people who like goth/nuwave in lolita are that rare, sorry your comm sucks anon.

>>10325181
this is typical burgerland retardation

>>10325213
Good luck anon, lots of us oldfags in the US are into the goth scene

>>10325693
Is it required of you to listen to v-kei bands or knit to be a lolita? No. Now scoot

>>10325633
I’m about to drop $300 on this and I’m pretty excited. It will be a good excuse to get to a club

>>10325693
Subcultures share some sort of values across all its members that apply even during times when they are not wearing the related fashion. This is not true for lolitas, who are all over the place value-wise.

>>10325751
As if goths share the same values, they can't even decide if they're racist or not in 2020.

>>10325751

>worship of burando
>common lingo (jsk, op, kc, petti, ouji, these things have no/different meaning outside lolita)
>lacemarket
>"raschel lace is evil" (unless it's Meta)
>grosgrain ribbon > shiny satin ribbon
> replica debate
>lolita meetups

We have *something*, even if it's not music, lifestyle etc

>>10325868
Grosgrain is uglier than satin, idk what you're on about.

>>10325881

shiny satin, anon. How'd you become a lolita but miss the memo on how evil shiny satin is?

I want to take cute pics of my comm members, but I know it'll just cause problems. I love to take candid photos of people - you can see their beauty and personality so much better. With posed shots, people just tend to look uncomfortable and walled-off. You can't see any spark of the real person.
I know that just having my camera out will make people uncomfortable. With my friends, I've reassured them that they'll always be the first person to see whatever pictures I've taken of them, and that any that they dislike will be immediately deleted, no questions asked. But those are my friends, people who've known me for a long time, and know that I'll keep my word. But I only know my comm members on a surface level, not to the point that they could trust me well enough to let down their guard like that.
So, oh well, I'll dream. And continue to take posed shots of people grimacing while trying to look relaxed.

>>10325896
Satin is utter trash as a fabric but I like it in ribbons. Maybe it's an unpopular opinion but I think grosgrain is ugly and I hate the texture of it. Stupid ridges. I don't want to wear a pastel potato chip. I would take satin ribbons over it any day.

>>10326033
you could always ask people if it's ok to take candid shots and only take pics of people who said yes? i'm sure someone would be willing to participate

>>10326041

lol gurl. It's not about you, or even about the ribbon. It's advice given to newbies when they start sewing. The advice differs on whether or not you can use quilting cotton, but every sew-loli newbie advice out there will always have two things in common: avoid raschel lace, choose grosgrain over shiny satin ribbons.

Neither of these things are about the lolita hivemind. It refers to advice you commonly find in "lolita 101" guides. Surely you've read a few at some point? That's all they're referring to.

>>10326118
nayrt but I've only ever seen grosgrain ribbon used in bodyline shit, most brands use satin, petersham, velvet, organza, etc. seems like weird advice.

>>10325868
Anon, this is like calling my local woodworking club a subculture.

>>10325868
God this reads like a “lol non lolitas wouldn’t understand uwu” post. This isn’t a subculture, this is just a normal list of things you would pick up in a hobby

>tfw no military lolitas friends to attend neofolk gigs together

>>10326405
I don't wear military lolita but one time I got super wasted at a small party and a guitar ended up in my arms. I only barely know how to play and drunkenly played DIJ's Fall Apart for almost 10 minutes because I kept doing the chorus too many times and was just strumming the same thing. I had tears at the end of it because it was an emotional rendition but I wasn't actually sad about anything, lel.

>>10326405
You have to be K.

>>10325570
Honestly I don't think anyone would care. Most people there are already used to people judging them for how they look so they're more likely to be accepting of your alternative way of dressing even if it doesn't match theirs, especially if you're there to celebrate the music, which is the point. One or two people might sneer at you for not fitting in (the irony) but they're not important.

>>10326197
Baby uses grosgrain. Anon cherrypicked images of a bad grosgrain and a nice satin ribbon

>>10326463
What images?

>>10326033
That house side-eyeing gets me every time.

>>10325868
These are not values that are required to be a lolita. Plenty lolitas only wear indie/not burando, plenty are ok with replicas and raschel lace etc.

>>10326463
the OP used images that looked fine, idk what you're on about.

Oh my god can you people have a positive non controversial thread once if your gd lives??

Post fun things, stop arguing with trolls and getting into asinine debates about literally nothing.

We're doing a valentines day meetup soon and I am seriously stoked, I got an entire coord just for this stupid meet. We're passing out valentines and im lovingly creating my own and I'm so psyched even though they're derpy and time consuming but i don't even care I love Valentines day

>>10326848

>>10326894
...you...you know where you are right? Like you didn't get lost and accidentally end up on 4chan?

Probably milling around looking dumpy, like every year

Is there a comm in Las Vegas? The Lolita Community Directory is super outdated, and I'm super missing having lolita friends.

>>10327200
I think there's one called Pretty Princess Club. They're planning a Lolita convention in November.
The group name makes it sound like a DDLG kink so I would be cautious.
If they're cool I hope they work out as a comm for you, Anon!

>>10327605
PPC isn't a comm. It's run by a lolita from Seattle who wants to host a lolita con in Vegas

>>10327613
Thanks for the info, anon.
Why tf would she have it in Vegas instead of Seattle? Especially if there's no comm there?

>>10326894
You need the comfy threads.

>>10327648
There is a comm there, but I don't know how to get into contact. A friend used to live there.

My comm do nothing but go to "Vegan aesthetic restaurants" for meets and I'm tired of it & the sudden increase in their cliquey behavior. Our meets used to be at all sorts of places, now it's just for Instagram photos. It's a fucking joke.

I recently moved comms and was so excited to dress up and meet everyone here. Except there’s never any public meets except for the occasional con. Everyone seems to keep to themselves which makes difficult to make friends. It’s so sad because there’s tons of cute places to go here.

I wouldn't mind a relaxed meet at a tea place, lately i feel like all our meets have been highly themed, centered around a holiday, or focused on shopping and doing things. I just want to hang with some friends at a place with some atmosphere. Maybe I'll have to plan one...

>>10326417
That's not true. When I first started lolita and was at my first con tea party, I didnt know that taking pictures of people without their permission was considered rude; because I was in the midset of you are dressed up for a reason and at a convention so its expected that someone will take a picture or get video of you. I was doing a video just going over everyone at the event/what they were wearing; and someone got angry at me and said that I am not allowed to have her picture and I better delete it and that I was rude and should know better. It was a very yikes moment.

>>10327648
Having it in Vegas will make it more of a "everyone flock here because it's gonna be fucking lit" rather than just your run of the mill convention that only local people will go to probably. I know id make a special trip for a lolita convention in another state just because of the Vegas trip

moving to Atlanta soon, how is the comm there?

Is London still full of self obsessed efame wannabes and itas?

>>10328911
I feel like I've been hearing about them for months, but I haven't heard much about actual events or guests. The Instagram seems like the organizer's personal account. I don't care for her constant selfies

>>10328918
I didn't get that vibe when I visited but ymmv I guess

>>10328936
yeah, I hope we hear more about it as the event gets closer. I really hope it becomes huge, but even so, it would be fun to just hang around in Vegas with a bunch of lolitas anyway

>>10328909
Misfire? I was quoting the anon asking whether it'd be ok to wear sweet to a goth event anon.

>>10328936
they’ve posted a few events in the seattle comm recently but I just joined so no clue what any previous events/meetups might’ve been like or what’s happening at the actual las vegas event

>>10328949
I wouldn't mind hanging out with lolitas for a Vegas getaway. The MGM Grand is nice but seems like an expensive venue. I'd have to see how much tickets are and what guests are attending. This is their first year, so I don't know what to expect. Hope it's worth it if they want lolitas to fly in from other states

>>10328918
The efame gang don’t go to public meets much anymore and the other girl who hosted meets quit the comm because she got a weekend job and old drama.

Things will be better, although I don’t like the trend of pub meets.

>>10329185
I wish my comm had pub meets.

>>10329185
>1 meet at a bar
>2 meal/afternoon tea meets in the next 2 weeks
It's hardly a trend. You have options, why don't you just check the page?

>>10327702
>Vegan aesthetic restaurants
do those places really exist? if so, where? all i can find is ugly minimalist places not suitable for lolita

>>10329185
>>10329959
Any advice for organising a meet at a bar? I feel like there wouldn't be enough space for our petticoats

>>10328917
I haven't been to a ton of meets since I tend to be busy a lot when they have them but whenever I have everyone seems friendly and nice! Meets seem to happen maybe once every other month or so from what I've seen and it looks like people are trying to host more of them recently which is nice.

>>10325117
desu I used to think this way too about more 'out of the box' type meets, but I decided to just go for it and organize something. Everyone that attended told me they liked doing something else other than the usual teaparty or lunch-get together. I think you should give it an honest shot

>>10329214
host one!

>>10329122
Ticket prices are up. $120 for general admission. $175 for VIP

>>10330853
Those prices with no guests announced yet?

>>10329978
why would anyone want to do this? bars are filled with creepy ass men

>>10330873
Guests are going to be Puvithel and FluffyKawaiiJo.

>>10327200

I'm in the Vegas comm, it's set to private as we've had a few *questionable* people that ultimately had to be removed. Other than that, it's a pretty chill comm (usually 15 of us are actively attend meets).

As a Vegas Lolita, I'm a bit skeptical about this PPC but I mean them no offense. $100+ for admission is pretty steep when there hasn't been any *confirmed* guests or brands announced yet. I'm thinking of giving the people in my comm a heads up about this.

>>10330905
Has PCC reached out to your comm? I figured since it was in Vegas you guys would know more about it

>>10330873
they've been boothing at cons to advertise this event for the past 8-9 months. What are they even advertising? There's still time to book guests but no one's going to drop money if they don't know what's going on

>>10326411
Wow that wasn’t actually me but I’d love to meet who it was.

>>10330893
>>10330905
On the one hand I hope they do well and can keep growing, but my friends and I don't know any of the ppl running the event and it could be a disaster.

>>10330853
I'm wary of first year events after that Lolita version of dashcon. Even with some small guests it won't guarantee a worthwhile time. The ticket prices are fairly steep with little info.

>>10330949
Excuse me?? When did this happen?

>>10330954
Cakes & Couture 2017

>>10330960
Oh boy, can’t wait to read up about this

>>10330970
It's full of juicy details and there are videos by fluffykawaiijo and Lor trying to make it look like a good time.

>>10327009
Bless you

I really want to get more involved in my local comm. I'm in the group chat and talk with a lot of them, but cannot bare the idea of going to a meet (I've gone to a couple) because of one annoying woman. She can't spell (as is very evident in the group chat) to the level that I struggle to understand that she's saying. She's constantly buying new sets but always looks like shit. She works in something like Primark and tries to blend in stuff she gets on employee discount to her "looks". I'd love to meet with the rest of them but every time I've gone to the meet, she has to loudly make the conversation about her. I just want to look pretty with tea and embroider with others.

>>10330949
>Cakes and couture
>not a goddamn cake in sight
>Little debbie $1 at walmart tier mini donuts and mini muffins
>literal fucking Halloween candy

How much effort is it to go to a goddamn bakery or caterer and get actual catering? Whose obese white trash mom catered this event

>>10330893
That’s disappointing.

>>10330891
>t. burger
A nice British gastropub is nothing like your local sports bar full of drunk wrestling fanboys

I have no idea how to make actual friends with the girls in my comm. I've been going to meets for a long time, meet up with some of the girls outside of meets but I still never feel like our talk breaks through this absolute surface level of pleasantries. I also feel weird starting a convo with them online because there's no precedent.

>>10327648
Because flights and rooms are way cheaper to Vegas than to Seattle.

Honestly I hope it works out. I’d rather make a trip to Vegas than go to bum fuck nowhere for rufflecon and paradiso. I wouldn’t mind throwing down for tickets but the haven’t announced any guests yet.

>>10330977
Lor is a fucking shill for crap like this

>>10331185
You can't shit talk someone that paid for your room and board. She spends the whole video praising the whale of an organizer that was the furthest thing from organized.

>>10331192
The Lor shouldn't have said anything because now she goes down as a paid shill

>>10331135
Talk about drama with them women love to gossip 12/10 would recommend
t. I have friends now

>>10331192
>>10331087
I like that the food didn't even make an appearance or get mentioned in Lor's video at all.

>>10330926

PCC has not reached out to our comm as I don't think they know of our existence (since we are private). Because the entire thing is questionable, I am not sure if I would feel comfortable being associated with a first-year event. I'm thinking to allow a little time to pass first & perhaps if PPC makes more guest/brand announcements, then perhaps we can choose to talk with them.

>>10331065
host your own meet and block her so she cant see the event page

>>10329978
Get an area to yourselves. The best bar meets we have tables and can sit. The worst one was where we were standing and had been given a tiny table near the entrance. Also every cocktail came with a service charge. Not the fault of the host since she'd been told we would be given a private room.

I'd recommend making sure it's a bar you've been to before.

>>10330891
There are creeps everywhere. I'm not going to hide myself away on the offchance someone tries making me uncomfortable. Go out and live your life.

My comm holds themed meets but I never have clothes that match the theme reeeee

>>10330891
The social skills of a lot of my comm members improve greatly when there's alcohol

>>10331185
Isn't Lor always a shill anyway?
She's a litteral clownlita and a clown herself. Nobody but SJWs and noobs like her

>>10330949
Reason #1 I give my comm-mates weird looks when they tell me they plan to attend this event

I like the people in my comm but every time I go to a meet, I've started to get a feeling of "this was nice, but I'm done." I don't plan to quit lolita fashion, but I think it's time to back off slowly and just hang out with my friends for a while. You don't need a comm to be a lolita or even to participate in the international community.

>>10331774
Off topic but does anyone remember that anon complaining about all the themed meets her comm does and then several angry replies later we found out that all her dresses were cat dresses. All of them

>>10331259
And iirc they blamed the catering on the hotel policy. But the trash they served looks like it was unironically brought in from a Kroger or Walmart run, even the mini scones you can get at Walmart. Literally not even the shittiest hotel caterer would serve mini donuts at a tea. Bad macarons and mini eclairs from the freezer section of Sam's is the normal fare and would've been a big improvement. If the organizer could serve junk food what stopped them from grabbing a few actual bakery cakes other than greed

>>10332194
Here ya go
https://rbt.asia/cgl/thread/10118428/#10122632

>>10332194
Omg that was so funny. How can you complain about a meet theme when you keep excluding your own darn self by being SO specific with your wardrobe? Good times.

>>10331774
Same here. I mostly own solids and the themes usually revolve around whatever new AP print the host and her friends want an excuse to wear so I'm usually shuffled to the back in group photos.

>>10330960
That dress is ugly as fuck

>>10331774
I love themes, they are optional at our meets, but I have some solids that I can accessorize to go with any theme

>>10332296
Which comm? I'd love to see some new group pics of wearing the same print, or just generally matching in general. All group photos I have saved are so old. I wish people still posted meet photos to egl.

>>10331065
I think I’m in your comm. she’s a perms ita and I wouldn’t be surprised if she has some sort of mental disability. She comes to pretty much every meet but doesn’t even wear lolita to most of them, just her work uniform, but when she does wear lolita it’s a mess. She still can’t do eyeliner despite 3+ years in the fashion

>>10331087

>>10330891
You’re either underage and never actually been to a bar, or you frequent some real shitholes, because I’ve never gone to a bar that had a disproportionate amount of creeps around. Most bar people are relatively chill, just drunk.

>>10332366
I'm not sure we're talking about the same person as every meet I've gone to she's been in lolita, but I have missed quite a few (because of her). N. England (I don't want to be more specific)? I know others from the comm are on here as they've talked about our city before.

>>10331065
Hey don't hate on primark it makes up 90% of the finds in the egl bargain find group.

Have you thought about travelling to other comms? It's fairly normal in the UK to attend comms that are based 2 - 3 hours away.

>>10332434
I've just looked through her FB and there are many photos of terrible eyeliner so I now think we might be in the same comm.
>>10332435
There's nothing wrong with the good Primark finds at all. I've looked at travelling, yes, however since it's very north of Eng. the closest is Leeds or Scotland and I have have feeling she herself travels to the Leeds events (at least, she's discussed going).

>>10332434
Yeah, we're definitely talking about the same person

>>10332437
Oh I'm pretty sure I know who you mean now. She makes posts about hosting meets and occasionally makes events but afaik people don't actually attend. She usually creates one event a year so you're fairly safe. FOS is also a nice comm if you're willing to travel up this end.

>>10332438
I guess that's reassuring. I felt bad for finding her extremely annoying - everyone is really nice and polite to her at meets and in the group chat (including me obviously) so assumed nobody felt that way. The rest of the comm seem interesting, I'd love to get to know you all better.

>>10332440
Thanks, I'll check it out!

>>10332441
The only active new England comms are Boston and Rhode Island so now I'm dying to know who this is because I've never seen them in the Boston comm.

>>10331240
There's some girls in my comm who just talk about drama non-stop and it kills any actually interesting conversation. I wish they would leave or grow a personality.

>>10326033
just ask the group at the start of a meet if they mind pictures being taken. I doubt many will, especially if you don't just post them and you ask for permission first.

>>10326197
I have grossgrain ribbons on AP hair combs, cardigans and wristcuffs.

>>10327891
you may be in the containment group

>>10330949
what is this??

>>10333224
Same in my comm, and the most annoying part is that the ones who yell the hardest about hating drama and how they look down on people who talk about drama are the ones who always cause it and won't shut the fuck up about it. Maybe they think people won't notice if they put on this front of being so above it, idk.

>>10333266
>>10330960

>>10332172
This is what my friends and I have done. Honestly, meets just became somewhat unbearable as the topics of discussion were always the same and always awkward and stilted. Definitely having a better time now that I mostly hang out with friends.

>>10333455
Different anon, the only reason I still go to comm events is that there are some social things I want to do in lolita and it can be awkward if you’re the only one in a group in lolita. For example a kawaii cafe pop up. I want to go in lolita but it’s weird to have people ask to take my picture or compliment me and talk to me about my clothes while my friend is just standing there awkwardly being ignored by those people because she’s in jeans

Is there an active comm in MN (Twin Cities area)? I'm going to move there soon and already joined the Facebook group, but it looks to be super dead.

Lonely goth update: Was at a party with one of the most dedicated gothic lolitas I know this weekend. Closet full of Moitie dedicated. While our music tastes came up in conversation before, she's developed a new hunger for 80's goodness and it came up naturally in conversation. She asked for recommendations and I was allowed to hook up my spotify to her bluetooth. A whole bunch of new life was breathed into the winding down party. It sparked random conversations by dudes into retro music in general, people who didn't realise certain songs were goth, and familiar tracks that almost everyone knew the words to. There was some light dancing, and I invited them to join me at a big dark eighties night later this month. It's finally gonna happen, anons.

>>10333458
Oh I guess I'm lucky as my friends also wear lolita so we don't have that problem

>>10333709
>she ?

>>10333458
Same. Also my normie friends don't want to spend 50 euro on an Alice-themed lunch.

>>10333709
Fuck yeah, I'm happy for you Anony

>>10333709
>Lonely goth update
No1currr

>>10333760
Ayrt, I’ve only been in my comm for about a year, so I’m working on building actual friendships with some of the other girls but it will take a while. I think I’m getting there

Serious question: why do people bring their boyfriends or animals to meets? These people who bring +1 often don't engage with other lolitas when they go anyways. The animals I've seen at meets are ill-behaved or the owner won't watch over them. Why do you attend comm events with all this extra baggage in tow?

>>10334244
>often don't engage with other lolitas when they go anyways
they can't handle interaction with other creatures, so they stick to what they know

>The animals I've seen at meets are ill-behaved or the owner won't watch over them
they can't handle interaction with other creatures

>>10334244
Social awkwardness I guess. Usually I don’t really mind boyfriends because they mostly stay quiet and only talk to their gf/other boyfriends. Obvious exceptions are ticketed meets where they take up a space that could have gone to a lolita.
Though one time a girl brought her normie boyfriend and ignored him to talk to her friends, so he sat around the entire meet making stupid comments and thinking he was a comedic genius. Imagine those guys who think it’s hilarious to call you Bo Peep and ask about your sheep, except instead of driving by he’s sitting across from you for hours.

Pets are more annoying because they’re usually little yappy dogs that haven’t been trained to behave because their owner mistakenly believes that they’re too small and cute to be a nuisance. Fortunately a few girls in my comm are allergic so we have a very good reason to tell people to gtfo with their dogs immediately. Owners of obnoxious pets will always deny that their pets are obnoxious but even assholes generally acknowledge that allergies are a thing.

>>10333709
I'm happy for you that you made some goth friends anonette

>>10334244
I've brought non-lolitas before to very casual or short gatherings (like impromptu, let's-get-together-for-macarons kind of meet) either because I plan on doing something with them after, or I'm feeling particularly socially anxious and having them there is grounding. Usually it's because I know I won't be there for long and we're going out after

Is EGL UK just London meets that didn't make the cut to the comm page? I get confused when I see the cross-posting, I initially thought the hosts must have been banned from the comm but the cross posting means they're not. Other comms don't usually add their meets to EGL UK and it's not even big meets that get posted too, it's small meets as well. Are they trying to make EGL UK the London comm?

>>10334537
I’m not sure what your exact situation is, but in some big metro areas there’s a comm page that’s for actual local lolitas and then there’s a comm page for the city that non-resident lolitas will find meets on for when they’re visiting town.

>>10334541
It may very well be. We get the same people coming to the same meets, however. I know visitors are allowed into the comm though, I have friends who don't live in London but they're part of the london comm. It just seems split for no reason and like the London egl UK girls want to take over EGL UK and make it London part 2, electric boogaloo.

>>10333692
Lady Slppers are in northern MN, Rufflebutts are southern MN i've heard. Never seen either of them outside of the Como Obon festival or conventions/Paradisio.

>>10334664

>>10334666
replied to the wrong post, please ignore

I recently moved to Washington and was interested in the Seattle lolita comm, but when I look up on fb there’s two different comms showing? why is that (is one inactive)?

>>10334440
This would be a good exception of a space where SOs/non lolita friends to go to. Bonus points if they're familiar with the fashion.

>>10334537
No. There's no "cut", anyone can post any meets they want. The ones on the UK page are either K's brand tea parties which many girls travel in for or this one girl who doesn't post her meets to the London comm because she had a mild argument with one of the mods ages ago and holds meets in Greenwich which is "totally not London" and wants to feel like a big fish posting to the UK group.

>>10334549
EGL UK is an older facebook page and is more general, EGL London was made ages later because after the TPC died there wasn't an active London comm on facebook any more. "London girls" aren't trying to invade EGL UK, it is that one girl who is posting things there that don't belong and that's it. It is so annoying too, her meets are proper nice but I am not in EGL UK so I only know about her meets when she crossposts.

>>10334664
I joined lady slippers on facebook, but I'm scared to go to a meet up because I think there's a sissy in the community? Looks like an old man and dresses ita.

What are your community rules like when it comes to banning members?
>girl in my comm is a weirdo and slightly creepy but hasn't done anything against the rules so we can't ban her
>hope she'd leave on her own after seeing no one likes her but it's been over a year with no hope of her leaving

>>10335502
I don't know anon. I've been hoping some people would stop coming to meets because they had drama with other comm members and it was uncomfortable but they keep accepting and attending every single meet and it's been really off putting. I'm afraid a lot of the people I want to see have stopped going to meets and i have too and I think this is a part of the reason why. I wish they would at least take a break. They are not terrible at meets it's just uncomfortable which isn't really a banning offence I guess. But online they snipe at each other and it's embarrassing.

>>10334722
My advice is to join them and find out. Could just be two different cliques, or one could be a containment group

>>10335502
Can you just talk to her, specifically about how she's making people uncomfortable, then let a few trusted people in the comm know you're working on it? Because yeah, you can't solve everything by making a rule.

>>10335517
Can you talk to them as well? Like, let them know their online behavior is affecting the real life comm. It's fine to not get along, but keep it private and out of the comm.

>>10335517
I've had to do this with my comm, only the drama person is awful irl too. They come to every single meet. They're best friends with the mod and the only person that hosts meets. I wish I could come to meets again but I really can't stand being around someone so mean and rude.

So WTF is going on in Argentina?

>>10335502
what did she do? It seems mean to think someone should be kicked out who doesn't anything wrong because you don't like them

>>10335575
>trying to pass off replicas as the real thing
>bringing her yappy dog to a meet unannounced
>bringing her toddler nephew to meets while she was babysitting (again, unannounced)
>bugging people in DMs for opinions on what she should buy
>If she sees that a comm member marks themselves as attending an event on facebook she'll mark herself as going as well

Mods have talked to her about bringing pets/outside people to meets but she whined about it being an emergency and there being no one else to watch her nephew. They agreed that the rest was weird but nothing much can be done about it.

>>10335584
>>trying to pass off replicas as the real thing
Scanning is not against the rules?

>>10334722
The Washington one is basically inactive or has little activity. There are actually multiple comma and I advise you joining multiple. We are not competing or anything. The Emerald City is the active one and then there is North Seattle and Tacoma for meets closer to where you live but they frequently overlap.

>>10335603
I'm guessing she wasn't trying to sell, just telling people the dress she was wearing was the real thing

>>10335570
I'm from there but lonelita, it would be great if someone from the comm spills the tea. He was a member for years, surely something suspicious or offputting has happen before this.

>>10335522
Probably should talk to them about it I guess.Those convos are hard . I know other people in the comm have pulled them aside and talked to them about their behaviour IRL so that's improved but now the issues has been moved online.
Which if it were private would be whatever don't bring it to meets, however since its within the online community it's really cringy and embarrassing for our comm. There has been some bullying started/involving these people more recently but its hard to prove its by them. But it looks bad for our comm as they are a member/s.

>>10335663
Most likely, but probably nobody was willing to talk about it for fear of looking like the bad guy. My comm had a sissy who was flashing his underwear at girls but it took us over a year to find out about it because none of the girls wanted to be the one to bring it up, in case it was an accident or people would call them the creepy one. It was only when he targeted the same girl twice that she started talking about it and we found out it was a pattern with him.

>>10335823
I would start by thanking them for improving their irl behavior, then talk about how their online behavior, by being public, still makes people uncomfortable. Encourage them to bitch to friends, but to do it privately.

If you need an analogy, just use politics. It's not something everyone wants to talk about. And if your FB is nothing but politics, people might be wary of irl interactions with you.

>>10334995
ILD is in Greenwich though? Held by a mod.

>>10334995
>>10335000
>>10334537
well thanks to you salty cunts that girl just quit lolita so well done now now your precious egl uk wont be full of her meets any more

>>10336982
And nothing of value was lost

When you see the isle of reject itas make their own comm

>>10337161
OC?

>>10337169
> cackles in LA
that’s what you get for being mean to people

>>10336982
If she quit an entire clothing style because some anonymous posters mentioned being annoyed with her posts to a FB group, she must not have been that much into it in the first place.

>>10337173
Who was mean?

>>10334333
Was that a murder mystery meet or is there more idiotic partners out there?

>>10337169
Why is oc so full of annoying itas?

>>10334244
I’m surprised I see comments so often complaining about people bringing their SOs. Why is it a big deal? The socially awkward ones that bring their SOs tend to cling to them and mostly keep to themselves. Any of the rad people in my comm often have equally rad SOs that can be fun to chat with and are always down to take our coord photos.

As for the animals, this is the first time I’ve ever heard of someone wanting to bring a non-service animal to a meet? It must be the area I live in, because unless it’s a pet store businesses don’t allow pets anyways.

>>10337623
It’s honestly just never a net positive for anyone to bring your SO unless they are actually into the fashion. Either they’re a slob and miserable at the event or they look decent but I don’t want to talk to them cause I don’t want to be interpreted as some chick trying to get your SOs attention. It’s just kind of awkward unless we are all friends already.

>>10337628
>cause I don’t want to be interpreted as some chick trying to get your SOs attention.
Wtf.. why would anyone think like this? Are you projecting jealousy issues?

>>10337613
Because one of the old mods would let anyone in

>>10337613
Because the mods are best friends with the mean girl of the comm and refuse to do anything about her so the only people left who will put up with her are annoying newbies who don't know any better.

>>10324570
Fucking this. I would much rather just go to someone's home and have tea in their dining room or backyard rather than go do stupid nerd shit.

>>10337714
Sorry you got kicked out of the comm

>>10337714
Didn’t they just kick out all the itas and isn’t that why they made their own comm?

>>10337757
No, the creator of the group was removed a long time ago. The new comm is full of people who have never been in the comm.

>>10337714
You sound mad. Go have a snickers.

>>10337718
>>10337791
Welcome to the thread O and A! I know you don't have anything better to do since you're not doing any damage control with this new comm.

>>10337793
Why should they, they don't acknowledge anyone in their comm that isn't in their friend group anyhow.
Stop self-posting O. We all know you do it to stir up more drama. No one cares about the comm anymore. The new comm should be a sign that yours is dying out because of inability to keep members.

>>10337807
NYART
But comms don’t need to have a constant flux of people to be a successful comm?

>>10337807
Honestly, just stop mentioning them. They love stirring the pot, perpetuating drama, and attention-whoring. If that wasn’t the case, they wouldn’t jump on literally every fucking tread known to man that barely mentions “the mean girls in OC”, so obviously exposing themselves.

>>10337815
To an extent, yes. It's important to have new members to fill in for older members who leave or become inactive. That being said, the OC comm has become such a mess in the last year that they're bleeding old time members to neighboring comms. Now there's an ita comm trying to take its place because they didn't do enough to support newbies, going so far as to post them in ita threads, and didn't communicate with people who were banned about why they were banned, see gothnorma.