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/cgl/ - Cosplay & EGL


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10165383 No.10165383 [Reply] [Original]

As far as cosplay&lolita stuff goes, what are your sour grapes?

>> No.10165397

>>10165383
I'm completely aware that the only reason I don't like OTT sweet is because I have a very mature face and would look bad in it. Realising why I didn't like it actually changed how I look at it, I can appreciate it on other people now

>> No.10165400

>>10165397
same t b h
;-:

>> No.10165403

>>10165383
I've never cosplayed because I knew I was not in shape enough for it and not good looking enough. I'm aware people do it for fun and more power to them but I could never be okay with being the fat version of a character. Now I just am not impressed or inspired by cosplay and the whole scene.

I did find happiness in lolita though.

>> No.10165453

>>10165403
Similar
I took it upon myself to lose weight so I could still dress up but not be the fat character.
I'm down 20 lbs since January so far

>> No.10170225

I freaking hate when people tag stuff as #cosplaywip when it's a full cosplay done up in a shoot only tagged as such to reach a wider audience.
It's even worse when it's one of those share cosplay pages.

No asshole, you're just looking for an excuse to use as many tags as possible.

>> No.10170240

>>10165383
I really hate it when people tag a brand when they're not wearing any items from that brand.

>> No.10170247
File: 147 KB, 971x617, SmartSelect_20190515-203009_Chrome.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10170247

>>10165397
This anon gets it.

Other people in this thread mistook this to mean pet peeve apparently?

>> No.10172129

>>10170247
Lol this just shut the fucking thread down didn't it.

>> No.10172162

I'll bite. I was a little jealous of people who pump out a lot of cosplay when I was young, even if it was store bought.
I didn't make much and I would push myself to make whole cosplay instead of buying them and just having fun. I am not very good and while I could of got better I didn't have the passion.
To this day I will still look down on people who buy instead of making any part of a cosplay, but in my head I know if they are just doing it for fun I shouldn't care.

>> No.10172165

I hate that sweet lolita is the default style.

>> No.10172195

>>10172165
Same desu, theres much more to the lolita world than just sweet lolita

>> No.10172214

>>10172165
>>10172195
Do you people even know what sour grapes is? It’s not a pet peeve. It’s something that you’re annoyed with/dislike because it’s unattainable for you.

>> No.10172243

>>10172214
So like, what if we didnt have to make a grind our gears board and just use this as both? Clearly it's not a very popular topic without a gear grind element

>> No.10172281

>>10172243
>referring to a thread as a board
No wonder you don't know what sour grapes means

>> No.10172299

Sour grapes for me are teenagers who have parents that will buy them their lolita. My parents hate it and I was a handmade lolita for years until I moved out. I'm just so jealous that they don't have to work that hard for their dresses

>> No.10172312

>>10172214
I already pointed this out
>>10170247
>>10172129

>> No.10172506

People who post about their separate lolita dressing rooms and walk-in wardrobes.

>> No.10172577

>>10165383
>didn't enjoy cosplay when I was younger because I was fat and shy
>don't have much time for cosplay now and even though I work damn hard to keep my weight down despite my binge tendencies, taobao cosplays are still a pretty tight fit

I just want to have fun dressing up, not get reminded how tenuous my current normal state is every time I put on a costume.

>> No.10172579

>>10165383
Preferring classic to sweet, but wearing mostly sweet because I'm too fat for classic brands like MM and VM.

>> No.10172732

>>10172299
Same, but also younger people who get to spend lots of time and money on fashion and travel in general. My parents thought lolita was a waste of money and wouldn’t even let me have a part-time job to pay for it myself, because they wanted me to focus on school. My early twenties were similarly spent focusing entirely on my education and now that I’ve graduated, gotten a real job and finally have money to spend on myself, I don’t have the energy to go out and feel guilty about spending money on niche fashion instead of things I could wear to work or saving up for a house or whatever. My local comm is full of girls whose parents give them money for lolita, buy them brand for Christmas and their birthdays, support them in taking gap years to ‘discover themselves’ and financially support them when they travel to Japan. I wish I’d been able to enjoy my late teens and early-mid twenties like that.

>> No.10172739

>>10165383
I’m jealous of people who are my age (early 20’s) that still have financial support from their parents to pursue cosplay/lolita, whether it’s that their parents still pay all of their bills or that they pay for their hobby.
I don’t expect someone else to pay for my hobbies but it’d be nice if they did.

>>10172312
>people still posting pet peeves instead of sour grapes
>another anon explains what sour grapes is
>bUt I aLrEaDy ExPlAiNeD iT

>> No.10172874

>>10165383
Knowing I have every element to be a daily lolita (extensive wardrobe, job where I can wear lolita to work, supportive bf and friends etc.) but never getting around to it because depresschan and laziness

>> No.10172881

>>10172739
I posted the definition and people were still too stupid to figure it out so yea

>> No.10172883

I have small tits and feel somewhat satisfied when women with big tits complain about what a pain in the ass they are

>> No.10172886

There's a lolita who is more beautiful than me.

>> No.10172890

Sour grapes: I regret not wearing lolita more often in college — I had plenty of nice pieces, since my dad gave me a clothing allowance, but I was too depressed and shy to go out in them much. My college would have made for great photo backdrops, too. Now I wear it often but I’m older and live in a less aesthetic city, and I justify my regret by saying it’s better that I can afford my own clothes now.

>> No.10172959

Huge wardrobes. I'm not jealous of rich normies but I'm jealous of rich lolitas.

>> No.10172962

>>10172881
No the retarded part about your post is that you were annoyed that someone else posted the same thing

>> No.10172967

I'm really jealous of Lolitas I see at cons because I feel like my coords are never good enough and I don't have a lot of pieces or accessories. I'm also really peeved at worbla being so expensive because it would help solve a lot of problems I've had with cosplays in the past really easily...

>> No.10173017

>>10165397
Same but mine was because I've never been a ’cute’ person. Thankfully I've grown out of resenting that. I'm very glad I'm not cute now but I love to look at cute styles on other people who really do suit it so well. And yes cute older ladies too! I believe that sour grapes can be worked on and in many cases, cured by a proper attitude adjustment.

It helps also to realise that Lolita fashion needs all the variety of everyone to even keep it going.
One style alone is not enough to sustain it.

>>10170240
This is not sour grapes but it bugs me too. I just think they are just wishful thinking or worst case, actually an idiot.

I used to have sour grapes about smaller sizes and more restrictive cuts but I got wise and learned more about what styles are easy/hard to alter and found someone who does great alterations. Screw resale value, my choices are wider now (pun intended) and my stuff fits well and is comfy now. That's priceless and makes me relaxed and happy while wearing the fashion much more often now.

Still have a bit of sour grapes over people who look good in pink. I generally don't unless its a more muted shade. There have been a lot of pink things I liked.

>> No.10173189

There's this one girl on twitter I was kinda sorta friends with for a while because we bad the same semi-obscure interests. She has a room ABSOLUTELY FULL of merch and expensive clothes. She travels all the time; has been able to go to a lot of cons and see guests related to the series I like, she's been to Japan and liveshows with actors I want to see, and she's traveled to other states and got to meet one of our mutual friends before me. Every time I see her traveling to see stuff related to my interests I feel wildly jealous, I eventually ended up muting her and she unfollowed me, but my heart still aches when I think about all the liveshows and cons I'll never get to experience that she has. The cherry on top is that I'm pretty sure her family is paying for it all since last I heard she was just a uni student with no job. Kill me, bros.

>> No.10173242

gatekeepers who shit on new oldschoolers for being “edgy”
like who gives a shit they’re not doing any harm

>> No.10173263

>>10172299
Same. Ive had to work for everything i have, and seeing 15 yr olds with no job getting lolita from parents makes me so bitter. I had to wait until i was 19 and stable enough to really invest in the fashion.

On the other hand, i wouldnt have it any other way. I feel it makes me appreciate my wardrobe that much more and really cultivate my taste since i had to be picky on what i spent my money on. I dont think teens can feel that and will likely fall out of the fashion faster.

>> No.10173279

>>10172732
Ah man, this hits close to home. Growing up we were definitely not rich but also just on that edge of not being poor enough to get extra scholarships and stuff like that, so my parents never had the means to support me in travelling and buying clothes or even moving out. I never minded because I like being able to take care of myself independently but damn if I don't feel salty whenever some entitled teenager just takes all the expensive shit their parents pay for them for granted.

>> No.10173290

Juliette et Justine.
Their pieces are lovely but waaaay out of my price range. I do not even understand their pricing for printed dresses, their construction is very simple and similar to IW, which are much cheaper. Also their sizing is somewhat questionable.
I cannot say I do not like them though.

>> No.10173314

All those japanese brands I cannot buy because of 50% custom taxes and retarded customs office hours. I literally tell myself "meah, not really my aesthetic" at this point.

>> No.10173323

>>10173242
Read >>10170247

Also bandwagoning edgy old schoolers can go choke

>> No.10173324

I'm jealous of short girls who can pull off AP's tiny dresses. Some of them just don't look good with an underskirt.

>> No.10176002
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10176002

Sack dresses
Salopettes
Highwaisted skirts

All the things that want to wear but know that I will never look good in because of big ol' cow tiddies. Kill me.

>> No.10176028

>>10165383
I hate sissies and ageplayers but some particular OTT sweet main pieces are kind of cute to me.

>> No.10176041

MM and VM. Their stuff is beautiful, but it's way too small for me.

Also anything without a defined bust tends to look either weird or downright abysmal on me. I wanna wear it but my boobs say no.

>> No.10180376

>>10165383
I hate cats tea party because I missed out on the mto

>> No.10180381

>>10180376
Enough people bought the MTO that it will pop up for a decent used price if you wait. You'll get another chance at it.

>> No.10180383

>>10165383
short lolitas. i wish i didn't have to extend my jsk straps and wear an underskirt.

>> No.10180447

Lolitas having cute faces. I have "manface" and even makeup can't hide it perfectly.

>> No.10180456

>>10165383
underbust anything because i wish i was about 2 cup sizes smaller

>> No.10180527

When I realized how easy it is to look good and get asspats in cosplay solely by having huge tits.

I’ll just be over here feeling slightly consoled by not needing to wear a bra unless I want to conform to beauty standards outside the house and fitting into brand pretty well.

>> No.10180536

Brand is getting popular

>> No.10180539

>>10165383
I'm really jealous of that young French girl who modeled for JetJ and is friends with all the old egl LJ popular lolitas. I wish I had a rich, supportive Mum when I was younger, I was cute when I was 15 too though not quite as skinny. I always think mean thoughts about her but I know it's just because I'm jealous. How has she networked so well too? I don't understand and I hope she appreciates what she has.

>> No.10180551

>>10172732
>>10172299
Saaaaaame I remember watching pixielocks videos when she was still a Lolita just to sit there and seethe in jealousy at the shit her mom would buy her while I had to put most of the money I was making into savings for college and spend my pennies I had leftover on bodyline. I think she's like a year or two younger than me so the fact that we were similar ages but she had so much more than me made it worse I think.

>> No.10180763

>>10165383
A V-shaped torso, square jawline and height

>> No.10180795

Im jealous of people who go to comiket

>> No.10180896

Girls.

Girls can cosplay whatever they want. Gender swapped is applauded and there are tons of people who design gender swaps.

Men on the other hand, if you don't have the,craft skills of a god or look 10/10 no one will notice you. There are no gender swaps for men and the few that are look shit and people question your sexuality.

>> No.10180912

>>10180896
Same, also have sour grapes about how popular the girls I started cosplay with have exploded on Instagram. I'm at 100 or so followers and they managed to get 5k+ followers and became too good to do groups anymore.
Feels like sour grapes because if it could be popular I would, but seeing people I started with and are relatively the same skill get fawned over by thousands of people, while I get maybe a handful of pics at most at any given con is frustrating.

Any mistake a male cosplayer makes gets amplifies to the extreme while people overlook it for girls and transboys, along with the Instagram/facebook game and algorithms being more favorable to them.

>> No.10181049

Not sure if this counts as sour grapes but I first started getting into lolita when I was about 16 and even though they were really supportive, my parents are the kind of people who are really weird about secondhand clothes (like thinking it's all dirty, only poor people wear used stuff kind of bullshit) and back then they were paying for my wardrobe, so going into the fashion I never let myself have the experience of picking a 'dream dress' and searching for it. I would just only look at new stuff, it was so limiting and I got into this mentality that once a piece was gone it was gone and I shouldn't bother looking for it or thinking about it unless it got rereleased.

Eventually I started making my own money and buying secondhand, it felt like a whole new world of stuff had opened itself up to me. But still I feel that I don't get the attachment to specific pieces that other lolitas do. I feel like I'm missing out on the experience of having a dream dress and looking for it and I feel jealous whenever other girls find their dream dresses after years of searching and get super happy about it, because I don't know if I'll ever get to feel that way.

>> No.10181064

>>10180896
I'm a girl, and I fucking hate gender swaps because I like the characters as they are presented. If you're a dude and you put the effort into passing with a crossplay, I respect the shit out of you and want to be your friend. Genderswap is just fucking lazy, on either side, but I also resent that it's the path most girls take in cosplay, and it is so depressing when I want to meet castmates to take photos with.

>> No.10181094

>>10181049
Your parents mindset is far more harmful especially with how many clothes get put in landfills. Maybe take a scroll through lolibrary to find a design to fall in love with.

>> No.10182246

>>10180539
Pretty sure that girl is 14, not 15. But the reason she's friends with all the LJ oldfags is her mom, who is very nice and a social butterfly. The kid is more of a cute, aspirational doll who gets to hang out with her mom's cool lolita friends.

>> No.10184003

The hate on Holy Lantern because i'm literally the only one without one. Even with the multiple re-releases i've always been either tight on money or just narrowly missed the date. all the memes just make me bitter.

>> No.10184010

>>10184003
Why not buy secondhand then? Seems like if it's been redone so many times there should be plenty in resale

>> No.10184317

I used to be incredibly salty about any efamous lolita being discussed or getting attention. It's actually because I tried several times to start a YT channel and blog many years ago and either ran out of steam or just didn't attract any attention or following, so when I see people getting thousands of followers and admirers on instagram because they own the latest AP print and can take a few cutesy filtered photos or wearing some super OTT gothic coord that you absolutely can't wear out of the house outside of a big event, I'd get super buttmad, but really I'm just jealous and I don't wish them any ill will at all.

I'm definitely getting better about it, but I know one or two people in the same situation and it's something you really have to grow out of in your own time.

>> No.10184319

>>10184003
This is exactly me. Every time it was rereleased I had just paid some big bills or was otherwise broke. Some girls in my comm that I'm friends with did a group order for the second release and they were so excited with their dresses and I had to decline because I was fuckin broke.

I also feel weird about paying above retail for a dress that has been released so many times, so I guess I'm just never going to own it unless they release it again because everyone seems to mark it up.

>> No.10184330

>>10165383
>best friend’s mom has been buying figmas, nendoroids, and import merch from eBay and shit since before they were easily accessible in the states for his little siblings
>when I was that age my parents were too afraid of Internet scamming and/or didn’t know how to shop online
>(not that I would have had the balls to ask anyways)
It’s so easy to buy gifts for niche hobbiests these days. It also makes it harder to really surprise your friends at Christmas.

>> No.10184331

Youth. Pretty sure I hit the wall this year and my nanchatte days are numbered.

>> No.10184360
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10184360

>>10184331
Worried about that too. I had a job that paid good money compared to most jobs in the area but i hated it and i was miserable. Now i have a job i like but im not making anywhere near the money i used to. Now i feel so salty about not buying nanchatte and focusing on all the lolita prints i wanted. I feel like instead of investing in lolita i should have invested in nanchatte first. Now i have a bunch of clothes and no proper shoes or pettis but im trying to stay strong and finish my wardrobe instead of jumping ship and buying another style and being salty about my lingering youth and lack of funds. The jealousy is starting to settle in on others and it makes me feel ugly on the inside.

>> No.10184499

... I think I'm actually quite happy with my lolita and cosplay life! Good thread, OP, thanks for making me realize it!

>> No.10184506

>>10172739
I used to feel really shitty living at home and going to college, not being able to make much money. I could kind of afford lolita but not much. I couldn't wait to get out and have a big girl job and not depend on parents.

Now I am a little jealous of those girls whose parents give them all the money and they have no bills, until I remember that I had that life and it didn't make me happy.

>> No.10184561

I am extremely jealous of kids whose parents are supportive of their alt-lifestyles. Mother hates anything to do with cutesy shit so it stings because it's a huge part of who I am... I am going to go in a rant now and I am so sorry, but kinda need to let it out.

>mom leaves me with dad when i turn 6
>somehow expects me to still fully accept her when i turned 11
>gets buttmad when i choose to live with dad even though he's been the only one looking out for me
>abandons me once again after i come out and say her nephew raped me.
>I honestly don't think I'll live past 18 but o well

fast forward to now, I'll be turning 26 and had no idea I'd be alive rn.

>She is VERY verbal about how much she hates me wearing cute things
>funnels all her money into her son who is just letting himself rot for diabetes. he takes her for granted.
>has bought him three cars! two of which he has totaled!
>I have always expressed love for languages, interested in becoming an interpreter or other language careers.
>she has zero interest in helping me even though I'm the daughter with the most potential.

I just want a break gulls. Just wish she loved me enough to help me, but she has actually expressed concern with things like "If you actually had money I fear the garish things you'll wear". I've just accepted it and will put myself through college. I will cut her out of my life and will make sure to send her unaddressed postcards of my paychecks and of me wearing cute shit.Tho the money will be the part that hurts her the most since she's always clung to people with money like a leech.

>> No.10184619

>>10184561
Better that you know now than people who end up funding their shit parents because they played like they cared about them.
It is still bad and I am sorry that you deal with it.

>> No.10189090

My sour grapes is people who have less stressful jobs that still pay well. I can buy the things I want, but work stress has definitely aged me and I don't look as youthful as I think I should for lolita fashion. I'm also exhausted when I get home from work so can only wear it once a fortnight.

>> No.10191415

>>10189090
Anon, are you me?

>> No.10191423

For me, it's being able to host meets.

Throughout my entire life, I've had bad luck at hosting events and people usually don't come to get togethers that I throw. Part of it is because I usually have a smaller, tight-knit friend group, and part of it is because I just don't have experience hosting events and get extremely nervous about making sure everyone has a good time when I do. I've never tried hosting a meet but I just always imagine it'll go poorly.

So I've kinda just written off attempting to host a meet as "well it probably sucks anyway", even though I know deep down I'd love to host something fun and successful at a place I like.

>> No.10191437

>>10184561
Live for the salt you can rub in her future wounds, anon. She deserves it.

I wish you all the cute shit and the best dates and all the fun and money you can get your hands on. I'm rooting for you in place of her, and I believe you can do it! <3

>> No.10192668

Crossplayers who can pass and be cute and feminine.

>> No.10192681

>>10191423
Maybe you just have some annoying quality that no one tells you to your face. There's a coworker who's always inviting me and my friends, but we all try to dodge it because when he talks he goes on and on about boring shit. Nice guy. But boring and annoying. Wish I could tell him to listen more and talk less, but we're not close like that.

>> No.10198627

>>10165403
summer goals so you can join the fun

>> No.10198911
File: 82 KB, 250x333, D4E2F942-9DC2-4BD9-A88A-70BE2FCD55B6.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10198911

Anyways it would come half-dead for like 600 bucks

>> No.10198921

I hate seeing the new gen of cosplayers having all these resources and having amazing skills and thousands of followers at <18 years old. I’ve been at this for over ten years, all I can think of is how far my skills and following would be if I’d had the resources these kids have. It’s not fair that they get to skip the weeby eBay cosplay stage while I fight for recognition.

>> No.10198924

>>10198921
Boohoo grandma. Why not be happy for them rather than envious?

>> No.10198925

>>10165383
I'm envious of my friends' ability to spend super frivolously on brand and have amazing closets. Ive missed out on many conventions because of work and having to save for doctors appts (I'm pretty sickly and don't have good insurance atm). I also envy the fact they can casually go get stuff like perms, pretty nails, and skincare treatments while I'm here trying to stretch out the last of my beauty supplies until a coupon or sale comes along..

I know it's not for forever. I'm gonna start working at a great company, it comes at the price of a year or so of no real social time, but it means I can finally get rid of my student loans and afford those comforts. I guess it's also kinda feelsy but I am sour about having to wait for things to look up while I see other people living it up x.x

>> No.10198929

I have sour grapes over the girls who can afford to buy up and resell burando all the time. I don’t think it makes them mad bank or anything and I know they get called scalpers but I do see that they are wearing so many things and living their best lolita life. I wish I could do it too.

>> No.10198933
File: 470 KB, 537x645, ClassicFary_front.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10198933

I waited too long deciding to buy a dream dress because I was scared I'd spent too much on other stuff. Got sold almost immediately and then I sold some stuff and made my money back. Now I look at this damn dress every day and dream about what could have been. Pic related.

>> No.10198940

>>10198924
this is a sour grapes thread.

>> No.10198975

as happy as i am that i'm going to have a great job, i'm sad that i won't be able to wear lolita much anymore. it's going to be business casual normie wear all week. i guess i can try to cute it up but it's important that i look respectable as a new hire. i'll be jelly of everyone who can look cute at work or wear their clothes whenever they want. i might have to sell stuff because i was a daily lolita with a stupid big wardrobe and i'm a little salty.

>> No.10198979
File: 57 KB, 360x480, 475130f5a2693cdc1c4dc12735d084fa--punk-lolita-gothic-lolita.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10198979

>>10198975
lolita can be pretty dressy, so maybe you could see if dresses with small petticoats are allowed in subdued colors? just a thought

>> No.10198983

>>10198975
It’s ok, don’t sell your best pieces but let go of some things in a big closet cleaning to thin your wardrobe and sell them off. You’ll have a smaller but better closet and your buyers will get some good things! Congrats on your new job!

>> No.10198985

>>10198979
anon, this looks hideous and anyone who showed up like this in a normie workplace would not be looked at favorably

>> No.10198986

>>10198979
That’s not remotely business casual and she will need to make a good impression and not come off as a fashion weirdo, anon. Don’t encourage this kind of stuff!

>> No.10198987

Doesn’t matter how thin:
>no short torso
>no short arms
>no short legs

Fuck you, Angelic Pretty, I never really liked you anyway.

>> No.10198990

>>10198975
Don’t sell everything! I worked in THE most stuffy environment imaginable for years and was able to use a lot of my lolita items. In fact, most days I was able to get away with all brand. Depending on your style, blouses, jackets, purses, accessories and shoes can be used with normie items. Casual-cute jfashion items from places like jane marple or axes femme can fill in gaps. You said you are business casual, so it’s not like you need to be in Brooks Brothers every day. Just tone it down and wear something without a petti.

>> No.10198991

>>10198987
this makes me feel a little bit better about having a short torso bc i look like a fucking fridge with long legs. bless highwaisted cuts even though everyone hates them. you don't want short legs though! long legs are fab!

>> No.10198992

>>10198987
AP does have some longer dresses and if you get a JSK the arms don’t matter. The normal waist will be empire on you, but depending on your body type it can be really cute. But also, same. I say Baby is my preferred brand, but that’s only because they make skirts long enough to look decent in. If AP has long skirts I’d have half a closet of them.

>> No.10198995

>>10198985
depends on the business. if she works in banking/some really serious stuffy place then, yeah, stick to normie stuff. i work in a creative field and i'm a daily lolita, nobody bats an eye. sorry your place is stuck up.

>> No.10198996

>>10198995
>sorry your place is stuck up
>sOrRY yOU'rE a pROfeSSiONaL

>> No.10198997

>>10198995
I’m >>10198990 and I worked in banking, but somehow stuffier. The only no-go wear nothing but grey industry I would say is law, and that depends on your office and industry.

>> No.10198999

>>10198996
> thinking you can't be a professional and wear lolita

i know this is the bitter thread, but damn

>> No.10199000

>>10198979
ayrt, your pic is cute in my opinion but unfortunately ("unfortunately" i sound like such a whiner) i'll be at a multinational big 4 firm and serving some of the biggest clients in the world. i wish i could get away with lolita without a petti but after visiting the office i think that's a no-go!

>>10198983
>>10198990
good points!! i'll look onto axes femme and jane marple. i wear AP and most of my stuff is hella sweet so it looks like i'll need to do some shopping.

>> No.10199002

>>10199000
>Big 4 firm
I’m bank anon, and I would stick to black and suits until you figure things out... who told you corporate casual??

>> No.10199006

>>10199002
>>10199000
Edit, what department/field are you in?

>> No.10199007

>>10198999
Which professional jobs? Pretty much anything that involves talking to clients would be a no-go.

>> No.10199010

>>10199002
my recruiter! everyone was wearing business casual when i was there, only when meeting with clients/traveling do they seem to stick to black and blazer/skirt sets. i shouldn't namedrop the company ofc but for context it's a pretty fresh and young environment despite being so.... big.

>> No.10199012

>>10199006
oop, sorry for samefriending but i'm a cybersecurity consultant.

>> No.10199013

>>10199007
i'm in game & design as a 3D modeler / concept artist (sometimes). that's a good point about front-facing jobs. yeah, that definitely sucks

>> No.10199018

>>10199012
>>10199010
Ah, then yeah you’ll be okay. Especially in cyber security...it will be a lot of guys, which means they’ll likely not know what women are supposed to be wearing anyway (at least that’s how banking was). You should be okay. If you wear sweet, you should look at Emily Temple Cute, Leur Getter, Milk, Ank Rouge (older pieces), Amavel and Kate Spade (western). Stick with solids or simple patterns and florals. Obviously no toy themes or plastic jewelry.

>> No.10199021

>>10199018
Men aren't retarded, they know lolita is not what normal women wear. And (sadly), if you want to be taken seriously in a professional environment, dressing cutesy, feminine, and what normies see as "childlike" will hold you back.

>> No.10199025
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10199025

>>10199021
Mmm, I got promoted two in two years at one of the most prestigious banks in the world, so I’m pretty sure it’s fine. For ref, this is the type of things I wore.

>> No.10199027
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10199027

>>10199025

>> No.10199029

>>10199025
at that point it's basically normie wear with a small (if any) petticoat, which should be fine

>> No.10199030

>>10199027
If you aren’t an idiot, you can wear brand and look professional. Also most of the women’s in the office licked Kate Spade’s dick, so if you lean more into that from sweet you’ll be fine. A brand blouse + a pencil skirt and a blazer is great and probably even too dressy for her office.

>> No.10199032

>>10199029
This is all brand you walnut. I’m not saying show up in Honey Cake. I’m saying don’t launch your daily wardrobe into an inferno when you can make a lot of it work.

>> No.10199035
File: 1.43 MB, 480x270, 1559093178997.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10199035

>>10199030
keeping up with the theme of the thread, even though i like kate spade i can never own any because my ex wore them almost exclusively and now it's ruined for me.

>> No.10199036

>>10199035
If it helps, their quality isn’t amazing or anything. You’re basically paying for the design and label.

>> No.10199037

>>10199036
thanks anon that actually does help. bless you.

>> No.10199038

>>10165383
people with huge followings and talented friends that they can tap to do group cosplays with. i'm aware that i am aggressive and antisocial and would have a bigger friend group if i made an effort to be likeable, but instead i sneer to myself whenever i see an awesome group

>> No.10199039

>>10199037
Np. if you shop second hand you can get similar cute higher end designer for the same price. I mostly use it to blend in amongst the normies.

>> No.10199041

Pushing a dress code at a brand new and great job because of ‘muh fashun hobby’ is not the wise thing to do anons. Please return to reality.

>> No.10199049

>>10199041
Again, if it’s business casual, if you aren’t dressing like an idiot you aren’t pushing anything. Of course, if you use the lolita rules like a safety valve and know jack shit about normie fashion just buy 5 pairs of pants and 10 blouses. I agree it’s best to play it safe, but you CAN do it safely.

>> No.10199051

>>10199032
what the fuck is it with you calling everyone a "walnut"? No one is saying it isn't brand, it just looks extremely passable as normie.

>> No.10199057

>>10199051
Where else did I call someone walnut? What are you talking about? Also, again, use common sense. Of course it’s nearly normie, the point is to wear it to an office. However, they look good with the blouses and shoes etc I own, so I bought them. This isn’t that hard.

>> No.10199059

>>10199025
you have really good taste. what's the red skirt with the crown details called?

>> No.10199060

>>10199051
>missing the point this hard
jesus

>> No.10199063

>>10199057
you call people walnuts all over this fucking board, it's annoying as shit and makes it clear who you are. no one else does that.

what are you even arguing? I said it looks normie. i'm not saying it shouldnt

>> No.10199064

>>10199059
Two of them have red and crowns but both are JM. It’s been a while since I bought them, so I don’t actually remember their names off the top of my head. Oops.

>> No.10199066
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10199066

>>10198986
there's no reason you couldn't wear something like this (minus the head accessories and parasol) and pull it off in a business casual place desu.

>> No.10199067

>>10199063
Walnut is a common board expression of endearment here for ‘dum dum’. I’ve seen it used here for 2+ years. How new are you?

>> No.10199068

>>10199063
I stop in here like once a month. I don’t think I am the person you are talking about. I did use it because I’ve seen other people use it, particularly on twitter.

>> No.10199069

>>10199063
walnut even has its own urban dictionary definition... it's probably some other anon

>> No.10199071

>>10199066
No. Just no. Also I M O is replaced with desu here. Now you know. Lurk more, larp less please you fucking newfag walnut.

>> No.10199074

>>10199071
> calling people larpers for having differing opinions

ok becky, time for your afternoon nap

>> No.10199075

>>10199071
Confession: sometimes I type i m o because I think the desk replacement is amusing. Although, I agree with your sentiment. Don’t wear petticoats in an office.

>> No.10199076

>>10199071
even oldfags know t b h and i m o replace with that, don't be stupid. people just don't care because everyone knows what it's meant to say

>>10199066
i know classicfags love grandma-kei but yikes.

>> No.10199077

>>10199075
i'll wear whatever i please because my bosses aren't stuck up cunts with sticks up their ass :)

>> No.10199079

>>10198924
You must be 18 to be on 4ch, pissbaby. I never said I wasn’t happy for them, just that I was jealous.

>> No.10199080

>>10199076
Oh! I love grandma-kei, but it makes me look awful. So I just pretend it’s ugly...

>> No.10199081

Business casual in a top company is going to be judged by boss, by peers, by clients, etc., so new job anon should be safely close to current on trend styles and not trying to shoehorn in her hobby fashion. It’s as much about the focus and perception as it is about the image people see. Many reasons not to be too showy with any hobby stuff at work including things that affect your image. Especially right at first!

>> No.10199082

>>10199077
You sound insufferable (and this is coming from someone who hangs out with tattoo artists and mechanics).

>> No.10199083

>>10199077
good for you?

>> No.10199085

>>10199081
Alternatively, standing out in a good way will get you noticed. This isn’t terrible advice, but it doesn’t always work out the way you planned. Being invisible is not a great idea. And no, “being seen for your great ideas and work ethic!” is starry-eyed and naive.

>> No.10199086

>>10199077
bosses at a forever21 tend not to give a shit about anything

>> No.10199090

>>10199086
I'm a graphic designer and my clients regularly compliment me on my dresses. My bosses like that I stand out and look friendly and well dressed when we're competing for clients. Imagine that.

>> No.10199092

>>10199090
People cleft graphic designers to look quirky. They don’t expect their lawyer to look quirky. Your boss isn’t fun and understanding. They see your as a tool to add to the experience of working with your team. In an industry where that experience is not what people want, your same bosses would tell you to change. Sorry, sweetie.

>> No.10199093

>>10199092
expect graphic*

>> No.10199095

>>10199090
No customer wants their doctor, lawyer, broker, banker, or consultant looking like that. Of course artists get a free pass. Use common sense before you say stupid shit about "teehee my boss is just better!!111"

>> No.10199097

>>10199092
Knowing how to put together a good team and using their skills and individuality to your advantage isn't mutually exclusive from being fun or understanding. Have you never worked for someone you actually liked?

>> No.10199100

>>10199095
Did you even read the thread? There was a banker in here who posted her wardrobe. You can still be j-fash or lolita in a professional setting. Just don't sperg out and wear your cutesiest ageplay sweet stuff and you'll be fine.

>> No.10199102

>>10199097
If your exact same boss was the manager of a law firm, they wouldn't let you dress that way. It's not about your boss, it's about your job.

>> No.10199103

>>10199097
You implied them letting you wear lolita to work was because they had a good personality, ie, weren’t “stuck up.” It has nothing to do with your boss’s personality and everything to do with your industry. I know plenty of pink-haired quirky designers who have bosses who are dicks. None of them care if they wear cool clothes, because it’s what the industry wants you to do. You aren’t special, you’re a product.

>> No.10199104

>>10199085
Showing you can fit in well in a new job is very important. New job anon has plenty of time to assess the situation and it’s never a bad idea to err on the conservative side when settling in somewhere new. But then I’m one of those people who don’t think you should put too much importance on your unique appearance at work. I stand out because I’m a tall blonde with green eyes. It would be nice to be able to just fit in easier looks-wise and not have that constantly be the first thing people address. And yep, I dress stylishly but conservatively at work and it has served me well.

>> No.10199106

>>10199104
I guess agree to disagree. I’ve had good success at cautiously standing out (within reason) as it makes the c-suite remember you. If that’s not your experience, then that’s fine.

>> No.10199107

>>10199100
When the wardrobe is indistinguishable from normie clothes to normies, why even bother acting like "wearing lolita to work" is some big deal?

>> No.10199108

>>10199107
It’s not, that’s literally the point. Some people like using the clothes they spent money on.

>> No.10199113

>>10199103
Lolita doesn't have to be quirky if you stear clear of sweet or stereotypical goth. It's a pretty conservative style. The only thing I would consider slightly off kilter about lolita are the styling/accessories some people wear, or the prints. Blouses, plain fabric skirts, and normal looking shoes shouldn't be getting you the stink eye. If all else fails just go otome.

>> No.10199114

>>10199107
The whole point was that you don't need to trash your carefully curated wardrobe. You can still use pieces you like and make it look office approved.

>> No.10199119

>>10199108
>>10199114
Entirely depends on what your lolita wardrobe looks like. Mine, aside from a few blouses, 1 pair of shoes, and hosiery, would never pass as normie.

>> No.10199120

I started a jfashion in the workplace thread so we can stop trashing this one >>10199117

>> No.10199125

>>10199106
I guess so. I always try to use things connected to my job or to the company as my ways to stand out. But as a woman in a mostly male office, I am just more comfortable in the work environment that way, removing things that actually call attention to my appearance. Which is funny because I frill it up big time on my own time, or when working remotely and pretty much just wear lolita when I’m not at the office.

>> No.10199143

>>10199090
have fun being poor uwu

>> No.10199146

I'm jealous of people that have huge follower counts and get tons of attention for store bought cosplay. Girls get so much more attention for their cosplays when they're more mediocre, and I think it's unfair. And it's not like I'm ugly or anything, I'm just not a girl. Like, I put in the effort and ground for this shit, I should be rewarded with attention. I've seen girls with shitty AliExpress unironed cosplays get complimented the same as armorbros that have very good work.

I just like sewing cosplays and I do it as a timewaster, but it still kind of stings. I do wish cons were more "self made cosplays", I like talking to other makers.

>> No.10199361

>>10199143
Do you... not know how much demand there is for graphic designers?

>> No.10199364

>>10199143
Have fun hating your livelihood until you croak uwu

>> No.10199482

>>10199012
I would wear IW if I were you, a lot of their new solid OPs are professional but still very cute

>> No.10199551

>>10199361
whocurr about demand, how much are you getting paid

>>10199364
>yfw people with actually respectable jobs can retire early with millions and live the rest of their lives
>yfw you will never know the benefits of having a bougie corporate job that pays for literally all of your expenditures (including spa, food, travel for leisure, etc)

>> No.10199561

>>10199146
I’m the same way, anon. Don’t know how you feel about your skill level but I would enter some craftsmanship contests. I’ve gotten to speak to some great cosmakers backstage about techniques and cosplans, regardless of competition level.

>> No.10199657

Spending money on countless dressup game apps like Love Nikki or Line Play because I always felt like I was too ugly/fat irl for Lolita, and now, years later that I've lost enough weight to fit into unshirred brand, I'm broke from spending my money on virtual frills. I have a small closet now but I'm still salty because i could've been motivating myself years ago by buying real lolita clothing instead of living my frilly fantasies through gambling gacha games.

>> No.10199681

>>10199066
Everytime this thread pops up I feel that cgl doesn't realise just how unusual it is in normie fashion for anyone over 15 to wear light coloured tights.

>> No.10199684

>>10199681
Phrased that badly, meant the topic of wearing lolita/jfashion to work generally

>> No.10199721

>>10199657
>spending money on lineplay
cackling

>> No.10199738

>>10199681
It’s rare but no one actually cares. It’s mostly because it’s not flattering, not because it’s considered immature.

>> No.10199790

>>10199738
Is it a cultural thing? Where are you from anon. I was brought up in Eastern Europe and it's a super uncommon thing to wear there, def associated with children. It's imprinted into me to the extent that I don't feel uncomfortable walking around in a fairly elaborate coord but leaving the house with white/cream tights on makes me feel deeply self conscious and hyper aware of how what I'm wearing reads.

>> No.10199803

>>10199790
Oh yeah that’s definitely cultural. I’m american never heard any of that. Just “it will make your legs look fat.”

>> No.10206911

I love lolita and I just started buying a few pieces a year ago, but I was talking to another lolita I met at a con and I mentioned how expensive the prices looked at the brand booth. (We were both models for their brand at the fashion show).

"But it's really not that expensive if you compare it to Japanese conversion prices."

And then I told her I bought secondhand and I felt the judgement.

I know I'm not in the best-paying career out there, but man, did I feel inferior. I'm sorry I'm excited about them coming locally while you regularly take flights just to see your favorite brands as they travel. Is it wrong for me to feel this salty?

>> No.10206919

>>10206911
Yeah it’s kinda silly of you. She was correct that the prices were cheaper than buying from the brand store online and complaining about brand prices is a big ita mistake.

But you are the one who is inferring the judgement of buying second hand because you know you fucked up

>> No.10206939

>>10206911
Brands only come to events that can successfully pay their way in sales so saying ’oh i don't even directly support the brand’ at such an event is kind of like saying ’yeah, I don't even contribute to them being here AT ALL, in fact I think they are too expensive and I'm not supporting their booth. I'm even uninformed about the general pricing of their stuff. But oh hey, I'm here to model and represent, yeah?’
Big faux pas, you should have kept your mouth shut about your buying habits instead of criticizing the brand you were invited to model for. It's rude plus that info is usually TMI anyway. I wouldn't judge your finances but I'm hardcore judging your lack of basic good manners

>> No.10206949
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10206949

>>10206911
You've been in this fashion a year and you're not even familiar with general brand pricing?
And how tf would you think that exchange would go? "That fashion you enjoy and respect enough to buy nwt is pretty expensive :/ I just buy it second hand." What reaction were you expecting? Lolitas have always had to deal with outsiders judging how much we spend on clothing, and you inadvertently did the same thing to the other lolita.

>> No.10206953

>>10199790
Eastern block ladies where I live don't wear em, they'll do sheer/black for church
So probably cultural

>> No.10207072

>>10206911
>>10206919
>>10206939
>>10206949
Same anon here, I'm familiar with pricing which is why I admit I'm jealous of people like her who didn't even look at the price tag for more than a second and bought multiple dresses on-site. It was definitely poor taste of me on my end, but this is a sour grapes thread after all. I want to still feel proud of the few pieces I have, but because of circumstances it's a difficult process. I'll do better.

>> No.10207085

>>10198979
thats cute af

>> No.10207094

>>10207072
When you vomit out your jealous sour grapes at an event, to a fellow lolita, it just means you are a rude bitch. Yes, you need to do better. You need to keep your jealous cake hole shut. Last time I attended an event, my fave brand gave an actual discount on the shop retail price of several brand new pieces. Stay in your lane, be quiet and go to the swap meet.

>> No.10207103

>>10199551
using my graphics skills as a UI/experience designer bitch, making $80K USD easily a year with 401K matching and generous PTO

you're just a dumbass uwu

>> No.10207257

I try to tell myself that short or average height girls (especially japanese ones) have stumpy legs/bad proportions, but that's only because I hate my tall height so much that I for multiple times contemplated suicide because of it.
I wish I was short, tiny, have a seemingly large head in comparison to a "sm0l" body, I'd do everything to look cute, I even look ridiculous in gothic, there's not way I could ever wear sweet or classic. Even 5-year-old me would look more mature than your average japanese adult lolita.
I'm scared of meeting other lolitas because I'd look hideous next to them, and with how many sissies they are into lolita, I might even get mistaken for a man.

>> No.10207297

>>10207257
>I hate my tall height so much that I for multiple times contemplated suicide because of it.
How tall are we talking ?

>> No.10207304

>>10207257
unless you're like 7 feet tall and built like an ox you're probably overblowing things. being tall isn't the end of the world. If you're too broad, lose some weight. Tall people can be cute too. I don't know if you've ever seen other lolitas in real life but most of them are regular looking people, not little bobblehead dolls.

>> No.10207322

>>10207297
5'10

>>10207304
>being tall isn't the end of the world
There was never anything positive about it, I suffered my whole life because of it. I was both skelly and chubby, but that didn't change how people perceived me. And it's always easy to say it's not that bad if you're normal yourself.
Maybe I wouldn't feel so bad about it if I wasn't a weeb, but that's not something I can change.
>Tall people can be cute too.
Not in my experience. People usually are only lying to be nice (or have some nasty giantess fetish).

>> No.10207339
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10207339

>>10207322
That's not very tall.. I think you need psych help, honestly. You must have some type of body dysphoria. That or you're trolling

>> No.10207359

>>10207257
>>10207322
Why the fuck can't you wear gothic and classic? Those styles are about being elegant, not cutesy. Long dresses and underskirts are your friends. A lot of lolitas are taller than you think. Tyler is 5'8 or 5'9 and she wears AP sweet. Lor's girlfriend is over 6ft. Being 5'10 is no reason to off yourself anon.

>I'm scared of meeting other lolitas because I'd look hideous next to them
You know lolitas are just regular people right? If your only source of the fashion is online posed photos of girls who spend months coordinating the perfect outfits and makeup, hair etc. you need to get a reality check. Even the most cutesy smol girls photoshop their faces to hell and back on top of all the effort to look nice.

>with how many sissies they are into lolita, I might even get mistaken for a man.
If you're a cis woman there is absolutely no reason why this would happen. Even if you have a masculine frame or face, again learn how to dress your body type and apply makeup. Worst case scenario you'll be put at the back in group photos. Honestly it sounds like you're down on yourself for no reason and need help, it also sounds like you're too lazy to learn how to wear lolita in a way that'll look good on you. Either way, life is seriously too short (pun not intended) to be so worried. Just wear what makes you happy.

>> No.10207384

>>10207322
taller = longer legs = more curves
also what
>>10207359
says
but not
>>10207339

>> No.10207393

>>10207257
Wow, i feel bad for you. I'm 5' 5" and I personally think I would look best at 4' 11" - 5' 3", which is actually just the average height of females my ethnicity.
I realize I have it better than you, but I 100% understand your struggle.

>>10207304
>If you're too broad, lose some weight
If you have broad shoulders, no matter how sickly anorexic thin you are, your shoulders stay the same size.

>> No.10207413

>>10165383
that one loltia who
>comes up to you asking if your obviously not self made dress is made by you, goes "ohh sorry" when you respond you bought it online
>that one who doesn't know what BO is
>offended by literally everything
>must be the center of attention talking about their dress even though no one fucking cares
>oversized/body positive one who literally does not understand their dress and wear does not work on them
>Has business cards that goes right to their tumblr and etsy account

>> No.10207450

>>10207413

I think you mistook this as the grinds your gearsthread, unless you're genuinely envious of those people.

>> No.10207457

>>10207257
Im the complete opposite kek. im 5'9 and I wouldn't trade it for the world. I often wear platforms or high heels (to appease the inner voice that whispers You Must Be The Tallest, Destroy Those Who Are Taller)
I love it, ot makes me feel powerful and elegant.

>> No.10207459

>>10165383
fucking high waisted dresses, i’m tall, broad shouldered and have much elongated bodily proportions due to my height (over 6 feet tall as a natural born female, yes, and no, i’m not a tranny)

but i can still make them work but sometimes on certain days i feel like i would be in an ita thread though everything else is fine. I’m a very healthy weight and everything, it’s just my measurements just can’t even compare to most people of the west let alone asia

>> No.10207461

>>10207359
bullshit

because of my tallness matched with everything else(broad shoulders and muscle mass, i have a very athletic body type, but not too skinny either) a lot of people ask if i’m trans or assumed i was when i was around actual trans people and was talking about something that lead to the misunderstanding

or especially at work, they’re like hey boss... o shit sorry hi ma’am lmao or a lot of people just ask if i’m a tranny

>> No.10207495

>>10207461
There are millions of women who are tall and have athletic body types, they don't all look mtf, they actually try and present themselves well. If you're not willing to put in the effort to look more feminine and dress for your body type, that's your funeral.

Outside of 4chan most lolitas are pretty liberal so even if they do mistake you as trans at first it's doubtful anyone would be rude about it, and when you correct them they'd probably feel more embarrassed than you for making the mistake. Some comms accept straight up cis men crossdressing provided they aren't sissies or fetishists. A somewhat masculine looking cis girl who puts effort into dressing nicely and doesn't act like a total autist isn't going to raise one eyebrow. You think everyone in every comm looks like a supermodel or porcelain doll?

Acting like all short lolitas are such uwu beautiful smol princesses and you're just too manly or tall to fit in so might as well die is not going to make you any cuter. These girls spend years perfecting their wardrobes, coordination and makeup skills, posing skills etc. and even they get shit on sometimes despite being ~uguu smol~ because their purples aren't the exact same shade or some shit. I'm telling you, life is too short to let anything hold you back from wearing what you want.
Lolita is alternative fashion, we all look like freaks.

>> No.10207545

>>10207457
I am the same anon. there are times I wish I was tiny and cute, but I like being all and I always wear platforms and heels and people who don't like it can fuck off.

>> No.10207548

>>10207495
trust me i get that but being over six feet is a pain in the ass. everyone appreciates my coords, as i work hard in them, i just wished my measurements weren’t so far away from what most dresses fit. because i’ve literally got to wait for every custom size release otherwise because the high waist will instead sit on my bust...

>> No.10207549

>>10207545
same, i love heels even though people like to perpetuate the myth of “you’ll be too tall” or “your feet will look too big and you’re not dainty because you’re tall”

>> No.10207558

People who have like 10k followers on Instagram when they post nothing but costests and closet cosplays in wigs they couldn’t even be bothered to comb. That shit leaves me bitter to no end

>> No.10207582

>>10207548
That’s fair enough but at least you put in the effort to build a wardrobe that flatters you and gives you joy. Not every single dress is going to fit every body type, it’s just a fact of life. I’m pretty short and skinny and although I’m luckier than most at finding things that I can wear, most brands don’t cater to my body either. There’s one or two that do but anything from current moitie to AP I’m basically swimming in and just don’t buy because they look ridiculous. The shoulders are too broad that they just look baggy and floppy, jsk straps constantly fall off and I have to either sew them smaller or adjust them all day. I look like a little girl wearing my mommy’s clothing sometimes and I’m not even flat chested, brands just have the strangest proportions. Some of my dream dresses just sit in my closet collecting dust for this reason. Any alterations I could do that looked good would require me to take apart and reconstruct some of my pieces entirely. I’d basically be making whole new garments out of the fabric just to get them to not look like shit.

For a while I stopped buying dresses completely in favour of skirts and a few well fitting blouses. It sucks I can’t look good in every dress I like but still I find what works and put effort into my coords and I enjoy the fashion. Anon acting like she’s better off dead for being 5’10 needs to get a grip.

Also, for the record the waistlines are too high on me too and I’m short. They look like shit on the small models wearing them too.I seriously don’t know who they are supposed to fit.

>> No.10207607

>>10207582
>jsk straps fall off
Okay, how tall are you and how heavy are you? If you know, what's your shoulder width?

>> No.10207609

>>10207322

>mfw I have a friend who's 5'10 but wants to be 6' like her brother

Different mileages I guess. She's not into lolita either.

>> No.10207683

>>10207457
>>10207545
>>10207549
We need to start a tall lolita biker gang

>> No.10207700

>>10207339
It is. Even though I live in one of the tallest countries in the world, the average height for men is still shorter than me.

>>10207359
I think you misunderstood. I do wear gothic as it's more forgiven on tall/mature types like me, but I still feel like I'm not quite cute enough for it. Classic or sweet however, would be absolutely impossible. And I'm sorry for saying this, but Tyler and Lor's gf are not exactly positive examples.
I know that other lolitas photopshop, but nevertheless their type simply fits lolita better (and they have a much easier time finding stuff that fits ) than I.

>>10207393
Thanks for being understanding, anon.

>>10207457
I know that many women would love to feeel strong, but I don't. I get that quite often, "tall women are fierce amazonian warriors who can scare away men!". I just want to be liked, I don't want to intimidate people even further.

>>10207495
Nta but
>most lolitas are pretty liberal so even if they do mistake you as trans at first it's doubtful anyone would be rude about it
just because lolitas like or have nothing against trannies and therefore would treat that anon/me nicely doesn't change the fact that getting mistaken for being a man is the most hurtful thing that could ever happen. What kind of logic is that?? Having to say "Uhm, sorry I'm actually a woman" is bound to make everybody feel like absolute shit, so don't act is if this is such a non issue. You really have no idea how lucky and sheltered you are for neither being able to nor having to relate to the problems of somebody like us. According to trannies misgendering is a "crime", so why should we have to take it so lightly?

>> No.10207764

>>10207700
>I just want to be liked, I don't want to intimidate people even further.
This is the root of the problem. You being tall isn't the problem, it's your desperate reliance on the validation of others and their expectations for you to fit in to a specific mould. I can guarantee you, fitting into society's expectations in the way you want to will never make you happy, even if you did achieve it.

>the fact that getting mistaken for being a man is the most hurtful thing that could ever happen
And oh boy, is this a whole other can of worms. To the point where I'm starting to think you're a troll. This is so, so far from healthy or normal.

>> No.10207767

>>10207700
Wow, if someone as fucked up as you can wake up every morning and not kys than I have nothing to complain about in life

>> No.10207778

>>10207764
>>10207767
You know exactly that I didn't mean that there's "literally" nothing worse than that. But in a normal, friendly conversation it's pretty high up on the list.
I really wish that this happens to you, be a woman, dress normally, have long hair, whatever, and then get called (or asked if you're) a man and see how that feels. Then you wouldn't feel so chill about it anymore. It makes you feel like a complete failure. (Even worse when it's children saying it, because children always speak exactly what they're really thinking without sparing your feelings.) This is not even about not fitting society's expectations, it's simply about wanting to be treated like a normal person, about not having to put in an extra mile of effort to "proof" you're really the gender you claim to be.

>> No.10207786

>>10207778
>This is not even about not fitting society's expectations
Yes it is, holy shit are you deluded. What happens if people think you're a guy? Does the world explode? Dose one extra kid die of starvation in the middle east? I'm a tall girl and my hair is cropped short af, of course I get the occasional "you look like a boy" from children, and it's never bothered me in the slightest because there's nothing wrong with it!? I just look at them and say "why do you think that?" And then I explain to them that there are boys with long hair, girls with flat chests, boys with long eyelashes, and that holy cow, we're all the same species! Boys and girls ain't that different.
But I'm from a place in Europe where women can be 5'11+ easy, and we tend to make fun of shorter ethnicities. Where are you from? Why are the people around you so obsessed with what gender you look like?

>> No.10207794

>>10207786
> What happens if people think you're a guy?
I want to die. That's what my op was about, you don't need to get so angry, it's simply how I feel. Good for you that you're so confident, but I'm not like that. And like I mentioned already, I live in a tall country too, but nevertheless the normal women around me are much shorter and I've always been singled out because of that.

>> No.10207797

>>10207786
NAYRT but I’m curious. What do the tall lolitas in your area do to cope with the dresses basically being made for shorties? Any tips, brands, cuts etc?
I’m 170, and though it’s not really what I’d consider “tall”, I have a longer torso too so that combined with my height is enough to give me some fit issues in the bodice length and skirt lengths.

>> No.10207802

>>10207257
Get help. You have an unhealthy focus on this issue that is way out of proportion to its actual importance in the grand scheme of things in life. Your height is your height and it’s one minor physical attribute of everyone’s life but it’s one that they cannot change. You are allowing it to occupy a much more important place. It’s not mentally healthy.

>> No.10207805

>>10207794
Then live in misery or die, I guess.

>> No.10207818

>>10207797
Eh, it's just the run of the mill advice. Bloomers+++, extra long otk socks, stick to a specific dress length+, and (cups hand around mouth) KNOW YOUR MEASUREMENTS REALLY WELL. I can't help too much with bodice fit because my upper body is small, my height's mostly in my legs. My biggest problem is length, which doesn't really bug me at all. Embrace your legs , friendo, I love coords with thighs peeking out. The best advice I can give you is to be confident in yourself.

>> No.10207824

>>10207797
>>10207818
Oh, and avoid high waist/empire cuts at all costs. Everything else is fine.

>> No.10207825

>>10207805
Okay.

>> No.10207827
File: 256 KB, 500x378, 1559720519456.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10207827

>>10207825
Good, problem solved

>> No.10207836

Amazon or thrifted ball room dress that looks like it got minimal cleaning after a rump in the back of a cigarette infested van. Every. Damn. Con.

>> No.10208297

>>10198986
I think it largly depends on the field your work is in and on company culture. If you boss doesnt care and your department manager doesnt mind, why not ? But you should not walz in like that on your first day obviously, read the company climate like you would read a room. I live in a country where >>10198979 could be pulled off in 60% off all companies IF you work in the right field.

>> No.10208486

>>10207582
fucken ell lmao i don’t get it either. i do get high waisted to look pretty plendid on me due to very nuanced adjustments in undergarments—-very certain petticoats and i’m going to just get a full blown corset as well even though i’ve an hour glass figure (though just elongated) but i’ve found that a lot of things look surprisingly nice if it’s a baby doll, have a cute ribbon or belt piece and tie it round waist.

the mystery of burando will persist

i mean it’s not stopping me from buying burando, i’m going to buy my first ap pretty soon, and getting another baby or atp.

>> No.10208488

>>10207683
i’m up for it, but let’s do horseback gang for antiquity’s sake

>> No.10208492

>>10207778
lets just write it down on record that trannies and libtards have ruined literally everything for everyone with their nonsensical retarded garbage politics... and go back to normal please

>> No.10208608

>>10180795
Umm you don't need to? I felt north american cons much better. They have panals and all activities but comiket is all about dojinshi, commercial goods and cosplayers. And its not doesn't even have good air conditioning, too much lineups and goods you wanna buy sold right away. You can't even make friends in there and its kinda like war zone... If you want that way?

>> No.10208624

Sweet coords and cute girls get all the attention. I’m much more classic in my wardrobe, more on the “pretty” side than the “cute” side.

It’s such a small thing to be mad about, and I should be grateful that I’m not a dogface. But I want my photos to get 100s of “likes” in CoF, dammit!

>> No.10208626

>>10208624

I have this feel so hard. I'm not mad, just a tiny bit salty that classic, particularly toned down classic, doesn't get quite as much attention anymore.

The thing is I think I could pull off sweet too but that just isn't me.

Like you said though, it's such a small thing to get salty about.

>> No.10208650

>>10208624
I'm a lonelita, don't post anything online. But I feel this irl too. I usually wear either old school sweet or goth, and I get so many likes and comments on my old school sweet outfits, but I can basically go the whole day wearing an old school goth outfit and no one says a word. It always surprises me, as I typically thing the goth coords look best in general, but I guess they just don't stick out as much.

>> No.10208770

>>10208624
If it helps, in Japan classic is the most popular lolita style. Only western fatty-chans are obsessed with looking like frilly pink bathbombs.

>> No.10208776

>>10208626
I think most of the lolitas who stay in the fashion as they age go more classic though? I’m not into the likes thing and I rarely post selfies and when I do, it’s mostly to instagram, only occasionally to CoF because I never get any good concrit there anyway, just questions on my items so why bother? Most older lolitas who wear classic don’t post (or browse) on CoF and play the likes game. The FB algorithm is not ever showing me CoF stuff in my feed either so that could be affecting things too.i only go there after a larger event and last time I compared CoF to instagram posts and so many more and better photos on insta. FB use in general is pretty much on the downward slide with anyone over 20 but under 50.

>> No.10208839

I want to get into lolita but my chin is too big and it makes me feel like I'm too ugly for it. Maybe I'm blowing it out of proportion because people tell me I'm pretty but I just can't stop hyperfocusing on that, every time I see a girl with a normal sized chin/jaw, I get so jealous. I've always wanted to dress cute and pretty but lately I've been dressing more and more boyish and toned down because I simply feel like my face doesn't work with it, despite me being the perfect height for cute clothes.. what a waste.

>> No.10208844

>>10208839
Chin/jaw surgery can be very aggressive and get you what you want. Don't let your dreams go!

>> No.10208861

I have the exact opposite problem from a lot of girls here, i wish i had an elegant frame and distinguished face, i wish i could pull off classic or even goth looking like a princess, but instead if i tried i'd look like a child larping with her moms clothes. Being 5' with a very small frame and extremely childish face makes it so the only style i can actually pull off is sweet, i envy girls like Fanny and Lor's gf, since they look so elegant and ethereal in the fashion.

>> No.10208863

>>10208861
Lors GF is getting pretty fat though so don’t feel too bad on her account

>> No.10208864

>>10208863
I hope she doesn't gain a shit ton of weight like Lor, she has such a pretty frame.

>> No.10208870

>>10208864
She probably will since both of them have drastically gone up in weight since getting together. It’s sad but I think for the sake of their health they should break up.

>> No.10208874

>>10208870
Lesbians always gain a shit ton of weight when they get together. Is pussy really high in calories or something?

>> No.10208878
File: 82 KB, 750x750, 1552508892711.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10208878

>>10208861
>complaining about having a cute face as somebody who dresses in dolly clothes
>complaining about being the same height like japanese girls as somebody who likes japanese fashion
According to your logic japanese girls can't pull of styles other than sweet too - which we all know is a lie. It's literally made for short and cute girls. Be glad that you fit lolita, anon, be glad...

>> No.10208881

>>10208878
Not all Japanese girls are thin framed with cute faces. In fact the average Japanese girl is, (shocker) average looking!

>> No.10208894

>>10208881
The average height of Japanese women is 5'1 and the average weight is 117 lbs. That's a bmi of 22, which is normal.

Meanwhile in America the average woman is 5'4 and weighs 169 lbs, which is a bmi of 29.0 or almost obese.

They're thin compared to USA hamplanets.

>> No.10208899

>>10208839
If people you trust tell you that you are pretty, then stop obsessing. Post yourself anonymously somewhere to get honest opinions if you are worried about the people around you telling you that you are pretty just to flatter you (it happens). But chances are if you are average to pretty, then just doing your hair and makeup to play up your other features like eyes will remove focus from your chin. Your biggest obstacle seems to just be yourself and your own perceptions though so try to get yourself to snap out of it and stop letting your chin make your decisions.

>> No.10208903

>>10208844
too broke for that and I wanna dress pretty now

>>10208899
you're probably right. just had to get my passport photo taken tho and now I'm close to tears because my face looks like .. that. Doomed to look like an ugly man with nice tits forever (or at least until I save up for surgery, but until then I'll be too old to be cute anyway..).

>> No.10208907

>>10208874

It's a feature of relationships with fat people. If you don't watch yourself you'll start mirroring your partner's eating habits and start getting fat yourself. It's not just a lesbian thing.

>> No.10208911

>>10208903

Everyone has shitty passport photos omg anon look at a really nice picture of yourself. And see a therapist you need someone to talk to about this

>> No.10208921

>>10208907
My friend is a 6'5 dude who started dating a chubby girl. A year later they're now engaged and he's gained close to 50 lbs and she's gained around the same amount. Scary.

>> No.10208991

>>10208907
>went to stay with fat friends for two weeks
>come home 5 pounds heavier

That mirroring shit happens so easily and I didn’t even think about what I was doing until I got home. I love my friends to death but I never want to let myself go like they did. I was even looking at photos of them from just a few years ago and they both used to be so much skinnier. Those two moving in together really fucked up their weight

>> No.10208992

>>10208608
Design Festa on the other hand...

>> No.10209000

>>10199063
I can't believe you haven't been utterly roasted alive for being so obviously new, ya tossin' walnut.

>> No.10209025

>>10208907
I'm thin and a bit outdoorsy and my fat partner has lost about 50lb since we started dating a few years ago. I never pressured them or anything so maybe the mirror goes both ways

>> No.10209132

>>10208907
There are statistics that show that lesbians really are fatter than straight women.

>> No.10209153

>>10209132
Gay men meanwhile are more likely to be attractive and fit or at least maintain themselves. Wonder if it's because women have lower sex drives on average.

>> No.10209185

>>10209153
You obviously haven't seen gay men often.

>> No.10209203

>>10209185
I was just at pride last weekend and I marched for a charity. Most of the gay men there were fashionable, fit, and attractive young dudes. The lesbians? 400 lb dykes that could barely march long enough before they needed to rest in the parade truck. Lmao.

>> No.10209209

>>10209203

This still pales in comparison to the literal planets orbiting each other that are straight couples. Lady lets herself go after pregnancy, dude doesn't give a shit and gets obese off of Bud light. It's depressing.

>> No.10209211

>>10209209
You just described my parents. How I ended up thin I'll never know.

>> No.10209215

>>10209209
Sounds like you live in a poor area

>> No.10209217

>>10209209
>b-but muh straight fatties
No anon, deny it all you want, but lesbos being fat is a fact. http://healthmedicinentral.com/health-news/lesbian-women-are-41-more-likely-to-be-obese/

>> No.10209219

>>10209209
At least straight woman are like this because of the aftereffects of pregnany, what's the excuse of you lesbians?

>> No.10209222

>>10209219
Apparently stress, which they're shit at coping with. Why are women so weak?

>> No.10209227

>>10209222
Could ask the same question about men with that suicide rate. I highly doubt the high obesity levels are purely based on stress, there must be other factors at play.

>> No.10209230

>>10209227
Women attempt suicide more, men just complete them more often because guns.

>> No.10209232

>>10209222
The title is misleading and is one of the conjectures that the researchers had out of many. considering it's a correlation study they would not actually know why lesbians are fatter than straight women on average.

>> No.10209258

Are the men really that much healthier when so many of them have AIDS doh. Plus tons of them use steroids. Source: gay roommate was extremely involved in my gay city’s gay community

>> No.10209276
File: 19 KB, 307x212, 1504830193669.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10209276

So, gay men have aids, lesbians are landwhales and straight men have shit hygenie. lol

>> No.10209293

>>10209230
Men are just much better at killing people, including themselves. That's why almost all murder is committed by men. They're natural psychos.

>> No.10209297

>>10209222
Men become an hero more than women.

>> No.10209303

>>10209297
In the neckbeard thread, there is an auguement about whether of not men should protect women from creeps, so this is debatable. Also men only care about themselves anyways.

>> No.10209310

>>10209303
Fucking newfag, look up what an hero is

>> No.10210198

>>10207607
Don't know my weight but I'm around 158cm tall and shoulder width is around 35cm, I imagine a lot of other asian girls have similar measurements. I think I just have the eternal bra strap problem but with everything.

>>10208486
Babydoll cuts are doable for short girls. I really like the long babydoll cut baby/aatp does if it weren't for the aforementioned strap problem, since I like longer dresses in general. I think it's because it's quite clear where the waistline is supposed to be. It's the really bizarrely short bodices or literal half tit waistline dresses some brands do which are the problem. It's like I can't tell if they're meant to hit the natural waist or be an underbust cut. They always hit at a weird point above my ribcage for me, most models or thin japanese girls look like they are drowning in them, I can't imagine how taller girls can wear them at all. What are the designers and/or patternmakers thinking?

>i mean it’s not stopping me from buying burando, i’m going to buy my first ap pretty soon, and getting another baby or atp.
I've stopped buying AP entirely, and most new baby/aatp pieces besides skirts unless I really like them because of all the fit issues. Hope you have better luck anon, sounds like you know what you are doing to get a decent silhouette. I used to wear a bit of all 3 substyles, but lately I think I've found my home in Grandma's couch classic.

>> No.10210201

>>10165383
Fit, muscular weabs that perfectly pull off characters like Kamina, Captain America, and Beowulf. Ugly, dorky weabs with qt White/Asian GFs, although that's getting a bit off topic.

>> No.10210202

>>10210201
what's wrong with brown girls? i bet you're a self hating brown dude

>> No.10210208

>>10210198
I mean i’ve experimented with it more, and recently i’ve done a lot to learn about the geometry of my shape and the cuts of clothing. aka i’ve gotten a clearer idea.

>> No.10212251

I used to post a shit tonne of coords on my IG but never got the chance to wear them in my busy work like.

I had to stop because some lolitas were using my ideas to accelerate themselves, then when I do get around to wearing my coord it looks like I've copied them. So stopped posting coords unless I'm wearing them on the day.

>> No.10212260
File: 1.05 MB, 886x1400, JoJo&#039;s Bizarre Adventure Part 8 - JoJolion [Official Colored] - Vol.8 Ch.31 - _I am a Rock_ Part 1 - 16.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10212260

The fact that no matter how buff I get/when i achieve my dream body, my face still won't look as good as I wish it was to cosplay hot anime guys.
Not that I'm ugly or anything, but I wanna cosplay fabulous motherfuckers like Josuke

>> No.10212804

>>10207103
80k is nothing im laughing

>> No.10218413

>>10172165
it seemed to me that it was always called 'elegant gothic lolita' and that gothic was the default, and 'lolita' was for brevity, but now....

sour grape uh.. literally just wish i was taller, longer legs specifically, everything looks like shit without long legs..

>> No.10218629
File: 79 KB, 640x850, 66432079_476816913129665_6993200630500163584_n.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10218629

this is more grinds my gears but this popped up in my #lolitafashion feed and I've rather upset about famous cosplayers hashtagging the wrong things to get more likes and visibility and no one says anything

>> No.10218631
File: 58 KB, 640x693, 66861130_660986754379763_3928788786753830912_n.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10218631

>>10218629
these are the hashtags used

>> No.10218672
File: 296 KB, 500x500, 1547586409401.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10218672

have accepted i'm ugly and have to cover my face in any and all pics. no sour grapes here.

>> No.10218723

>>10218629
>>10218631

Damn. This doesn't even look good, it looks like she's stuck in a couple of tyres and her legs are stumpy and fat thanks to the combo of short skirt (shows off her thigh fat), legwarmers (thickens her calves) + platforms (her feet look like stubs). Mostly the tags she really needed is #photoshop #instagramreality #fakeasfuck

Some anon is arguing people like these should be left out of the ita thread. My opinion, if they want the attention, let them have it. I don't think it actually matters to the person who posted it, if they did care they'd stop using the tags, but most of the time they aren't even into the fashion so they won't even see the comments. So why not use them as case study for why certain outfits don't work or don't look lolita.

>> No.10218841

Who needs stupid shoes section on lolibrary

>> No.10218855

>>10208776

I don't go on CoF. I'm mainly an IG user.

While a small part of it is that I noticed that despite not really changing my style, my general engagement has slipped, it makes me sad that in general it's sort of not that popular at the moment and overlooked. Like in order to make your coord get more popular these days you have to put some sort of gimmick on, and only then it will work. It sort of pushes people to do more OTT coordinates (or better photography) leaving more toned down classic in the dust.

(I also realize not changing my style is likely part of the issue, but I don't really want to change that. A lot of anxiety about likes has gone away since I got less interestingly enough, I don't feel a need to post anymore, but I'm still happy about dressing up so I think that's a win-win)

That being said, I'm really happy about the classic revival in Japan. Seeing all the renewed interest in VM makes me so happy.

>> No.10218857

>>10218723

NAYRT, I am not fond anons who do that either. I can only imagine they're probably guilty of it too, hashtagging things like #livingdoll and #hucow in the process to get more likes. We should put the people who misuse tags on blast.

>> No.10218877

>>10218723
Those are normal size thighs on a normal size woman. Nothing fat about them. Jfc, ana-chans.

>> No.10218893

>>10170225
Just report as spam. The more of us do it the better.

>> No.10218988
File: 140 KB, 2047x1153, makeup-before-after.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10218988

>>10208839
>>10208861
Get a professional make-up artist to teach you how to contour and accentuate the features you want to bring out, while minimizing the ones you don't like. It's not as dramatic a change as surgery, but it's also way cheaper (many make-up stores like Sephora and MAC offer "free with minimum purchase" and even a highly experienced professional won't charge more than a few hundred dollars for a detailed lesson). Bring photos of models who are styled the way you'd like to be, otherwise you might get a look that's more normie than lolita-appropriate.

(note that I personally prefer the before look in attached pic, but it is a good example of how make-up can transform a cute face into a more elegant one).

>> No.10219495

>>10218988
her face shape is exactly the same before and after, tho

>> No.10219500

>>10212804
You sound like someone who doesn't work at all. Foh with that role playing