/cgl/ - Cosplay & EGL

>>10089297
Why do they still have the damn size limit!? It's not the 2000's any more, come the fuck on

I just just post my secrets here since behind the bows can’t swallow their pride and get new mods. The excuse of “ it’s not my week, not my problem” is old and obviously flawed. I haven’t made a secret for BtB in maybe a year because of their shitty mods.

>>10089304
It messes with lj formatting newfag

Is it always the same mod 'forgetting' ? Can't they just get rid of that one mod?

>>10089344
The one that forgets the most is the one that owns the page. But all the mods have forgotten it over and over. There’s only one mod that posts semi on time but she’s even lapsed before when it was her turn. Someone was making a new one but nothing came from it. I would make a new one but I don’t know shit from fuck about livejoirnal coding to get it done. Plus it’s easier to simply post here. Faster paced and conversation moves better then the comments of btbs.

>>10089357
The reason I might post to btb over cgl is that a lot of people who don't go on cgl because "it's the asshole of the English-speaking Lolita community" still look at secrets. If you have something you want to increase general public awareness of without being identified, btb is actually a better platform.

>>10089368
Do you really think people look at btb still? Gone are the days were people would jump to check on sat if it posted yet.

>>10089371
Noobs in my community still talk about it, so I guess they do. Idk man, I'm really old and out of touch

>>10089378
Noobs seem to be all that submit now too, probably found it reading outdated blogs about "toxicity in the lolita community" and just couldn't resist the gossip. Y'know, like everyone did back when it regularly got 60+ submissions and hundreds of comments every week, except now if it gets posted at all it has a smattering of dumb shit like "MANA HAS NO NOSE" and "I'm a trans polyamorous cripple fat native american who regularly has KINKY SEX with my DADDY in AP and there's nothing you can do about it, this definitely isn't a troll post so please respond in the comments!!!"

There hasn't been any actual dirt that needed public notice like >>10089368 is thinking of in well over a year, and anything too nitpicky and desperate has a home on KF or LC now.

>>10089371
this one girl in my comm is super paranoid she'll get posted even though all her coords are super basic and she has zero internet presence lol

>>10089399
post her in the ita thread

>>10089416
she's not ita, arguably one of the better dressed girls in the comm just average nothing special coords.

>>10089278
I think we have to admit BTB is on it's deathbed now.
I'm not even talking about the neglecting mods, few and low quality secrets, but rather the comment section. There are no interesting discussions anymore.
Would anyone even bet an eye if they were posted like it used to be? No.

>>10089399
Lol there's one like that in my comm too
>mfw it's me
>mfw i have no face

>>10089535
I do know people using iPhone and iPad have a hard time responding and even submitting posts since it glitches out poorly. Secrets started back when smartphones where still up and comming so it was kinda just a on the computer thing. Now people are using smart phones to internet because they have time to do so like on the toilet or even in their commute to work. I personally use my phone more then my computer and can’t reapond or post secrets from either my iPhone or iPad. My android tablet though, you can defiantly post on. Considering iPhone is the more popular device, perhaps it’s because they can’t comment or submit posts any more after the 11.0 update a year and a half ago. It’s much easier to post here then there from the phone and any one who is in the fashion for more then a few months will come here irregardless if the “salt mine” comments. It’s drama and people love reading it.

>>10089324
Why are people still using lj when it's not 2003 anymore

Just let it die, btb has always been a cancer, pray cgl goes next. No one from any sane hobby or interest can understand why it was made or how it thrived, it's embarrassing to be a part of something that has these childish communities attached to it and flinging shit at eachother. The only people who use btb anymore are itas who don't know any better and people who peaked 10 years ago and are clinging to their jealous toxic youth

>>10089645
>pray cgl goes next
nice bait

>>10089606
*Coming, definitely, regardless
Ftfy

Sage for nitpicking

>>10089707
Thanks for being nitpicky because autocorrect just isn’t behaving today and I don’t care any more.

>>10089645
Then why are you here? Oh wait you’re one of those “ bad” people too.

Sage for bait

>>10089278
The only aspect of it that I miss is making images for it. I used to enjoy making my secrets as cute as possible, even if they were really bitchy sometimes. I know I could do that and post them here, but it just doesn't seem worth the effort somehow. Things vanish from cgl too fast

>>10089645
This theory that other hobbies and interest groups don't have this same amount of nitpicking and shitflinging is hilarious to me. I especially love when it's attributed to cosplay/lolita having a predominantly female presence because hoo lord if you wanna see some whiny petty fuckin drama I invite you to take a look at the fighting game community, largely men, and their ridiculous level of headassery, drama, shittalk, and sneaking around. You're experiencing confirmation bias because you interface with this aspect of this community already (I mean, you're here aren't you? whether you shitpost or gossip doesn't matter because you're aware of it here). I can absolutely, without a doubt guarantee you that any hobby group on the planet has at the very least a group chat outside the regular group where people talk shit about the other members. I remember fucking interpersonal drama, grudges, pettiness, and online idiocy involved in the goddamn Pokemon Go raid community, and all the interaction REQUIRED for that is to go to a place with other people and tap buttons for a few minutes on your phone.

The real childishness is trying to convince yourself that this is a problem inherent or exacerbated in lolitas and not acknowledge that its a human issue and if you dislike that kind of henpecking, sorry to say, people are probably talking shit about you in your underwater basketweaving group too, you just don't involve yourself in it.

WHICH IS FINE. You don't need to enjoy or participate in gossipy aspects of any hobby, but get off your high horse about it.

>>10089754
Well said

>>10089754
Lurker trying to study the male style, maybe aristocrat here.

Honestly the Lolita /cgl/ typical threads seems tame compared to:
Playerworld sandboxes, MMOs, Football teams with a c-college inferior complex, MtG and other sources of high autistic energy.

Most of the banter is fair enough, I can't say the same about some other shitflinging places. There's usually a justification with ita threads with how they might as well be wearing a bedsheet or w/e crappy piece it is / non-stylish mismatches and generally plain bully/vendetta gets immediately squashed.

>>10089762
Confirmed, I once watched people argue in the local MtG group about whether offering to shake hands with your opponent after winning your matches is polite or dickish and condescending and was stunned.

>>10089768
I've actually toyed with the idea of banning MtG from cons due to extremist sjw /pol/icies from their community and how toxic their passive aggressive elitism is.

>>10089392
There’s lolita content on KF?

I've always been tempted to post some of my coords in the ita thread just to get the realest feedback possible.
If I'm ita, they'll say why. If I'm not, they'll say it's fine. I might get some nitpick feedback, too.
I've never done it in case I get reported for being a vendetta-chan.

>>10089968
In the case of KF? Not really. There's a thread for lolitas in general and a thread for /cgl/, neither of which get much attention.
Not even Yumi King's thread is that popular.
Kiwis don't really give a shit.

>>10090272
Some people do this. I’m guilty of it because I wasn’t sure what I was missing in my coord and my comm is too hug boxy to help. Sometimes I even post to CoF then copy paste the image here on the CoF thread just to get some feedback. Anons can be brutal, but if you don’t get upset when people say “ this looks bad” and “I would change this because it’s the wrong color” you won’t be made fun of too much. Don’t put yourself though. That beings in a whole new herd of jokes. Some people do saying “ thanks for the crit, I’m looking into getting what was mentioned now” but most just stay quiet and keep notes. You do see when notes from the ita and CoF threads are taken into consideration when the next post is improved by what was said.

>>10089392
>I'm a trans polyamorous cripple fat native american who regularly has KINKY SEX with my DADDY in AP”
I chocked on my coffee over how much of accurate description this is of one of the girl’s in my comm.

>>10090734
>lolita is a costume because normie fashion is bland and cheap
wat

>>10090737
>lolita is /made/ into a costume by how bland normie fashion is
it means that because of how bland normie fashion is, wearing anything that takes more then five minutes of effort looks like a costume, no matter what you do or say about it

>>10090741
Anon I'm sorry but that logic is retarded, not just in relation to lolita but fashion in general.

>>10090743
So according to you, people who wear vintage fashion everyday are wearing costumes too?

It's fucking Sunday and no secrets again. Fuck this shit, never sending any in again. Confessions threads only from now on.

>>10090746
Misfire?

>>10090748
It’s fucking Monday in most of the world. And almost tuesday in some. I think you slept a whole day.

>>10090751
Shit not again

>>10090751
>I think you slept a whole day.
Shit, not again. Just makes the lack of secrets even worse though.

>>10090746
Nayrt but how is this hard to understand? Nobody here is saying lolita is a costume but the general public will ask anyone dressed up a bit if they're wearing a costume. I wear vintage and retro stuff too and I get the costume comments too.

>>10090743
English isn't my first language, but I don't understand why you would ignore all of the context given and the explanation
It makes you seem to have poor reading comprehension

>>10090741
Well I wear a lot of bright colors, and people often ask me if I'm trying to dress like the 80s. And when I wear anything dressed up a bit, I'm asked if theres an event, instead of like, I'm wearing heels and a glittery shirt because I like it. It's very normie both ways but people are still surprised.

>>10090994
Maybe anon needs to explain themselves better because saying
>if you look like you put an effort into your look, you immediately look like you're wearing a costume
sounds like an insane reach.

>>10091082
Maybe you should stop reaching because that's not at all what anon said

>>10091085
>because of how bland normie fashion is, wearing anything that takes more then five minutes of effort looks like a costume
Is it not?

>>10089324
>>10089297
>>10089278
>>10089304
BTB needs to migrate to somewhere that isn't on its last leg itself.

>>10091092
the use of "made" seems like it's not referring to how lolitas actually look but how it appears to outsiders. >>10090741 didn't write a great explanation but I don't see how you get "lolita is a costume" or effort = costume from the original

>>10091104
this

Does anyone else think that they should move to posting secrets every two weeks or maybe even every month? It would mean more secrets at the same time and they would have to post less often

>>10091100
Like where? Amino?

>>10092359
Only problem with that is secrets would be really old and irrelevant

Any bets on secrets actually getting posted this week?

I also enjoy that this time they didn’t make some dumb ass post full of half assed excuses why it wasn’t posted last week. I guess they used up every excuse they could think of and don’t want to admit they fucked up and are tired of doing it.

>>10092374
Half the secrets posted weekly Are old and irrelevant drama. If you want fresh new drama, threads like this are the best way to view them. Plus conversation moves a lot quicker here.

>>10090734
>>10090741
I find this narrow sighted. Designer fashion is still 'normie' fashion to people like this, but is of much, much higher quality than lolita.. if you look at the materials, patterns and stitching of dresses being released today, they are extremely underwhelming. I would rather pay $600 for a dress that has beautiful lace and a thick matte material with embroidery than $2-300 for cutesy art printed onto chiffon.

Part of what makes it look like a costume, to most people I know (and that includes those into more avant garde fashion) isn't the frills and lace and silhouette, but the cheap plastic accessories, wigs, shiny/thin fabric and poorly thought out placement of bows that are gathered poorly and can't be removed and ironed. To top this off, people try to match everything a little more than is natural, making it look uniform, like a themed character design with only 4 shades of color throughout the whole thing

>>10093057
I think that's a valid point. Wigs especially tend to have a "costume-ifying" effect even on people wearing relatively "normie" clothing.

(Also, major props to the gal in that photo for making that dress not look tacky, as wa lolita so often does.)

>>10093057
You're giving normies a shitload of credit for paying attention to details that they don't
also holy shit, stop hanging out with itas, I wanna throw up just reading what you described

>>10090734
Also I still don't understand how people are misunderstanding that secret, it's basic English clearly written by a non-native speaker, but it's basic English and totally understandable
Lolita fashion looks like a costume because normies dress boring, and that's okay
or
Lolita might as well be a costume because of how normies see it and normies are the majority, and that's okay
It's one or the other and they're pretty similar

>>10093065
Being Asian helps desu, not even trolling I think any chance of wa-lolita looking good on someone goes straight down the drain if they're a greasy white piggu (all other ethnicities are on a case-by-case basis)

>>10093075
>Lolita might as well be a costume because of how normies see it and normies are the majority
>implying normie opinion dictates anything
In case you've never considered this before, it's possible for the majority to be wrong.

>>10093087
>not even trolling
>greasy white piggu
Oh ok

>>10093087
Hispanic lolitas are pretty ugly more then pretty in the fashion. Asians only have it good because the western communities have yellow fever and see Asians as perfect when they are not. Nordic lolitas have a nice bone structure and tend to be more sculpted ( if they are not ham beasts) but even they can have some pretty ugly people on their comms. No one “race” is better then the other but rather the person them selves and how they handle the fashion and wearing to their shape and size.

>>10093065
I disagree about wigs being costumes because so many normies (black women in particular) wear them and they don't look like they are wearing costumes. But then again, a lot of them drop hundreds of dollars in good quality human hair or know how to style a cheaper wig to make it look decent, something that many lolita's can't seem to do very well at all.

>>10093204
It really depends on where you are though. Pretty much no one wears wigs in my country, apart from women going through chemo, and even then it's not exactly a widespread practice.

>>10093204
Yeah, properly styled human hair wigs aren't really comparable to unstyled, pastel colored plastic garbage from China.

>>10093204
This
I guess black people are just used to the concept of fake hair, so black people don't spot a clearly fake wig and wonder why she's wearing it, they might just think, "she should get better at styling that wig"
But also, I'm never gonna say wigs don't belong in lolita because I don't know every single persons life story.
They could have that hair pulling disorder or alopecia or their abusive dad shaved their head or some shit, who knows, none of my business

>>10093213
I don't think that wigs and hair extensions (fake bangs, curls, etc.) are inherently a problem in lolita, they're useful and can be very cute. The problem is that so many girls don't bother investing in good quality wigs and don't style them in a way that's flattering to them, assuming they style their wigs at all. When any aspect of your coord is treated in such a sloppy, careless way, it's bound to look bad.

>>10093215
Well big mood, but I'm not counting them
Itas aren't lolitas imo, we shouldn't call them such

>>10093217
I wasn't talking about itas though, many well dressed lolitas have very bad, clearly fake wigs as well.

>>10093223
Yeah imo bad wig makes you an auto-ita, that's big of a mistake to make

>>10093224
Welp then a lot of Lolitas are actually Ita then cause I see shit wigs in otherwise good coords a LOT.

>>10093226
I mean honestly, yeah
It really isn't as hard to style a wig as people act like, it's just lazy

>>10093166
Sorry its not an opinion you like, thats why I posted it in the secrets thread.
>>10093167
I see where you're coming from but I still think specifically in regards to wa-lolita, seeing a tall thin blonde blue eyed Nord in it would be sort of strange. Not that all Asians are without flaw, but speaking of yellow fever how weeby do you have to be to want to wear wa/qi/etc anyways?

>>10093213
There is the issue of poorly taken care of, ill fitting, low quality wigs that make anyone in any outfit look like they're in a cosplay. That isn't what I was saying. I think that lolita is passable as a street fashion despite what >>10090734 says. The issue is certain OTT elements that turn it from tasteful, into a costume. Cheap wigs and accessories are the most common culprit because most people don't want to spend 100+ on these things, but even a thick, well taken care of strawberry pink wig is going to make people think you're dressed up as some fictional princess and not just casually going into town.

>>10093087
Most casual Asian fast-fashion is more tasteful than what I see in NA. I don't think they automatically look better, I just think they have a better sense of style on average, like.. outside of lolita they would also wear nice outfits, unlike the majority of people I know. The sophistication in >>10093057
could be achieved in any substyle, the fact it is wa-lolita is less important than the fact that it looks elegant and natural, as though she exists this way most of her days and hasn't just forced herself to put on a thick face of makeup, heavy wig, dozen cheap accessories and a dress she wears once a month at most.

>>10093217
>Itas aren't lolitas imo, we shouldn't call them such
The reality is that most lolitas are itas, if you look at enough comm group photos. I think most of us here got into the fashion through weeaboo shit or cosplay, from a life of otherwise only ever wearing graphic tees with bad jokes or anime on them. Liking a fashion doesn't equate to being fashionable, and it takes awhile to learn.

>>10093688
think that picture wouldnt look as good translated to real life because it matches too much. it would probably be better with brown shoes and bag

the matchy-matchy part of lolita looks somehow uncanny sometimes, but mismatched shades look bad too. i think the solution a lot of the time is to use normie bags, shoes, and hats, the stuff brands arent used to making and do a bad job of.. and that lets you have more interesting statement pieces that people can shit talk you for on cof

>>10093814
I agree anon, great image

>>10089754
My partner is big on the fgc and I like lolita. We share gossip about our respective communities and typically the fgc has better drama than cgl will ever have.

>>10090272
Try the coord help thread if you see one pop up more folks willing to give you their two cents without the salt.

>>10093688
>she exists this way most of her days
I think this is really the defining line between what makes someone think "oh, she dresses odd" and "oh, she's wearing a costume".

>>10093909
yes.. something subtle in the way they carry themselves, always reveals the conlita..

>>10093814
>the solution a lot of the time is to use normie bags, shoes, and hats, the stuff brands arent used to making and do a bad job of
Only if said pieces actually work with the coord. You know some gulls read this and their mind immediately translates that to "wear whatever normie bags and shoes you have it's fine you're making a statement~"
If that is what you meant btw then no. Please don't do that. I'm all for mixing it up as long as you take care to make it work aesthetically, otherwise please leave that to people who are actually fashionable and know what they're doing.

>>10093205
Same here. Most of the black women in my country wear religions head coverings, not wigs, and fashion wigs aren’t really a thing. Hairdressers and accessory shops sell extensions but I’ve never seen full wigs sold anywhere but in costume shops and hospitals. If you’re a young woman in unusual clothing wearing a wig then people in my country will always assume you’re wearing some kind of costume. It can be annoying, but even more annoying imo are the girls in my comm who buy a €15 Chinese wig and plop it on their head without really styling it, then cry about the uncultured normies who think they’re wearing a costume. I think they spend too much time at cons and on the internet if they can’t see why they look costumey to the average person.

>>10093909
I think that’s a really good point too.

>>10093065
Wigs are more normie now than ever though, thanks to Kylie Jenner and Instagram thot style, anyone with an amazon prime subscription can get a $40 lace front delivered to their door in a day.

>>10093978
So you're telling me there's a conlita walk/posture?

lolita has always been costumey, has always featured wigs, and if lolitas are concerned about what normies think of them they should adopt a different style, wear it only at home, or wear casual lolita instead.

>>10093997
actually fashionable people would already have bags and shoes that arent normie garbage, obviously

>>10094007
virgin conlita...
>>10094014
>picks one of the few old school coords that happened to make use of wigs

>>10094017
point is they were ued, there really was never an era where lolita looked like normie wear. we really just need to accept that to some people we're going to look ridiculous and thats okay because we dress up for our own enjoyment right?

>>10093997
>You know some gulls read this and their mind immediately translates that to "wear whatever normie bags and shoes you have it's fine you're making a statement~"
of course

>Liking a fashion doesn't equate to being fashionable

I think you can give examples and advice, but if a person isn't able to decide for themselves what looks good or doesn't, they're just going to copy trends and flail about not knowing what they're doing. This is the same as in most hobbies where we are presented what is considered good, and shun what is not. The problem: 'good' is usually a vote of popularity, and

>The reality is that most lolitas are itas

a popular vote is not necessarily an example of the highest form of an art, you see this with the rise and fall of shallow trends. This is (in my opinion, part of) why we see so many popular sweet lolitas. Brighter colours and more OTT grab attention, while more subtle styles fall to the wayside. They become the spokespeople of the fashion, and someone like fannyrosie who has an incredible sense of style (and theoretically should appeal to normies, increasing her follower count) but has a fewer followers than lovelylor, who is by all means a fine person and great content creator, but her outfits are less consistent, and she speaks for lolitas while failing a "wear lolita for 24 hours" challenge which many of us succeed at daily. Not understanding how to dress down to something more casual is part of the issue, buying from brands we deem correct and good but do not fit, is another. I see people complain about sizing all the time, trying to fit into baby/btssb, and when offered alternatives they don't seem to know what the hell to do with themselves. If you're forcing yourself into something ill-fitting, it's probably because you are trying to emulate what you were told was good. When you say "these dozen brands do custom sizing" they are lost, unable to tell what is or is not good, for themselves.

t. pretentious lolita at heart

>>10093057
I think that what makes lolita look like a costume to normies is its level of clear refinement. And by that I mean the action of elevating an aesthetic, a look, a trait, etc. to a full well-thought coord, that shows the effort/idea behind it. In other dimensions of performance of identities through fashion, like wearing high-fashion items, I think the construction of “coolness” comes into play and tones its refinement down. Coolness is always meant to involve some kind of nonchalance, distance from caring, whereas lolita is the complete opposite; a coord is very transparent when it comes to displaying the process of selection, thought, and construction.

>>10093909
>>10093978
Whether you're a daily lolita or not, it's about treating the fashion as just the clothes you wear the same as anyone else who wears alt fashion. Most normies generally have seen some form of alt fashion at least once in their life and can tell the difference between "oh she wears those dresses because she likes them" and "she's wearing a costume and pretending to be a character". If you're acting different or if you sincerely cannot carry yourself for shit only then do people think it's weird (unless they're really closed minded or that one kind of pretentious who will just put down anyone who spends money on nice things). There are some who think wearing even the plainest normie dress on a regular day = trying too hard, who ask 'are you going to a party' even when you wear something plain. They're just not into fashion period. It's just not a thing they understand putting effort into which is fine, but it does fuel many lolita's complexes about "everyone else is a normie slob and I'm the only one who has ever been elegant or cute" that you hear sometimes.

What >>10094068 mentioned is also a thing. Hype culture is huge and a lot of people wear designer just because. Not that they don't care about their clothes, but aside from a few very classic pieces from specific brands, the care and love that goes into searching for, purchasing and coordinating lolita just isn't there. It's meant to look effortless and like that person just has that much money to drop on said item and throws it on nonchalantly. In comparison, lolita is more like "I scavenged the depths of the japanese secondhand market and got in a bidding war at 5am just to get the perfect matching headbow to a dress I have dreamed about for over 10 years" kinda thing. I'm not sure if this sentiment makes it seem like a costume to outsiders, but it definitely does contrast to people who just aren't into fashion. Realistically, it's no different to being dedicated to any other hobby.

>>10094068
>I think that what makes lolita look like a costume to normies is its level of clear refinement.

No, it's 100% about the normies level of experience with fashion. Multiple times (out of hundreds) I've been stopped by ladies who have asked me about my clothes, and they open with "your clothing is really nice - I can tell it's special/has beautiful fabric/expensive/crafted well! could you tell me about what you're wearing?"

If I am wearing a polished, refined coord, from something casual to something intense, no level of refinement or how aloof I'm being is going to convince fratbro "it's not halloween" jake that I'm not wearing a costume. Nothing at all. And his mindset is much more common and will always be. Just cherish the positive, lovely interactions with fellow fashion enthusiast normies and do not bother entertaining the idea of trying to convince the masses you're not wearing a costume. Who gives a FUCK what they think.

>this thread

>caring about what normies consider costumish and what not
>caring about what anybody else thinks when you're wearing what you love
Where the fuck am I? Just rock your shit no matter if it looks like a costume or not.

>>10094166
itas shouldnt cry about what normies think when they go around looking like /that/
lolitas shouldnt cry at all because normies dont matter

>>10093065
I've been struggling not to get a wig and use my real hair, but my real hair is thinning and looks horrible no matter how I style it. I'm dreading having to use one to look semi decent in lolita, but I can't see any way around it short of medical intervention. Ugh I should have posted this as a secret honestly.

>>10094101
Men who tease young women should be culled.

>>10094166
The secret literally says, "I think it's okay to wear a costume every day"
Normies think lolita is a costume, wear your costume happily

>>10093594
I think Wa is pretty? Why should it be limited to one race and why is liking it weeby? Because weebs wear kimono-style and other Japanese clothing and don't know what they're doing? What about all the other aspects of lolita that take from other fashions and cultures? What makes it not Britaboo? Or French? I don't understand this argument at all.

>>10089741
Good thing we still have an archive.

>>10090746
Yes.
Especially rockabillies.

who cares what normies think about what you wear? are you all new or living somewhere dangerous?
dumbasses will always think lolita is a costume, i wore a pink sweater with that AP scalloped short skirt (super casual) and someone yelled "it's not halloween" at me
let's face it, to a lot of normies it doesn't matter how good we look, ita or not, they just think we are freaks. just own it, or pussy out. something tells me everyone here only wears lolita to meets.

>>10094477
I haven't posted in this discussion yet, but this topic always cracks me up a little. Those of us who were goths or punks or whatever throughout our teens and/or 20s (and I am well into my 30s) are largely immune to shouts of "freak!" because it was not only inevitable, it was part of the allure of looking a certain way and standing out. When lolitas are too self-conscious to wear their clothing out of the house, they're effectively lolitas-at-heart who also happen to have lolita clothing collections.

>>10094477
fuck yeah anon. lolita is about rebellion, why has everybody seem to have forgotten?

>>10094494
>>10094497
I can relate to the anxiety of getting stared at, especially if you're a high school student, lets say. Normies hate seeing people who are different and try to force them to conform by getting angry. Not sure if it's something that comes with age, but there's a point when you gotta realise it's your life, not theirs, and they can't dictate what they do. Pretending to be something you're not everyday is depressing and pointless. If you hide who you really are, don't you feel even worse knowing that when the real you comes out the normie friends you have probably won't accept you?
If you're new and ita that's a normal phase. I see a lot of people saying "normies yell at you because you're ita!" but that's not true, they treat you the same. Normies don't have taste for high fashion. they just see us as weirdos. Like you said, lolita is about rebellion. Own your reality.

>>10094477
i dont care what normies think of me specifically; its the secondhand embarassment from other people showing up to meets that wear full brand but still look like theyre playing dress up

>>10094535
so? if you don't care what normies think, why do you experience embarrassment from that?

>>10094446
Not forever though. The day Livejournal closes a big part of lolita will be lost forever.

>>10094547
even if i look strange i know i look good, but hanging around people that look both strange and bad really cramps my style

it isnt about what normies think, /i/ think they look bad enough that it is cringy to be around, and instead of saying FUCK THE SYSTEM WHO CARES WHAT THEY THINK i encourage them to care about what normies think, so that maybe they get better at dressing themselves

normies dont think lolita=bad automatically, unless you+lolita=bad and lolita itself isnt the problem dragging that sum down, YOU ARE

>reeeeeeeeeee

>>10094477
It's wild that the secret that started this discussion was expressing exactly that

>>10094566
It was worded badly though, we wouldn't be having this discussion if the original secret was coherent.

>>10094068
I'm sorry anon but of all the reasons gulls have ever given as to why normies think lolita looks like a costume, this is the most far-fetched one I've ever heard. While I agree that the spirit of not caring/the sense of "coolness" is one of the factors normies like about high fashion, I'm pretty sure they don't look at a lolita and consider how much effort clearly went into her outfit, not even subconsciously.

>>10094477
Nobody here is saying that they CARE what normies think, but just because they don't doesn't mean they can't discuss it.

>>10094579
>I'm pretty sure they don't look at a lolita and consider how much effort clearly went into her outfit, not even subconsciously.
This, unless they ask you, most normies don't even realise the amount that goes into lolita. When answered, some people just don't understand why lolita is worth the money, resources and effort we pour into it and do come off rude and dismissive at times but that doesn't mean it reads as a costume because it's so ~elegant and refined~ It means that person doesn't justify putting effort into fashion. They'd be just as dismissive of someone wearing western luxury brands. Most people have seen a goths or rockabillys or punks etc. and take it as either 'oh it's just alternative fashion' or 'it's not halloween hurdur' based on their own perceptions. If they're into that stuff, they might be honestly interested in hearing about a lolita coord and the thought that went into it, even if they are normies. Some normies are genuinely curious and interesting in hearing about alt fashion, others are just dismissive because they don't care. None of this is even specific to lolita.

The only thing that makes lolita specifically read as a costume is when people treat it as a costume, put on a bullshit persona and automatically start spouting the "It's called lolita but NOT LIKE THE BOOK I SWEAR" shtick whenever some innocent bystander compliments their dress in passing because it has a nice print.

>>10094565
depends on the normie. I actually agree with the sentiment that itas are super cringe to be around. I just don't like that they are attention seeking a lot of the time, so really loud and obnoxious, talk to normies to explain the ~*~fashion~*~ and shit like that. Part of the reason I don't go to meets is because the people in my community are unbearable in that regard.
I think that if someone is ita but reserved and kind, I don't really mind at all. I'll try to help them obviously, but it's not about normies. I know most itas have some subconscious awareness that they don't look great and i want to encourage them to improve and feel better.
Unbearable people, lolita are not, are just always unbearable and horrible to be around.
>>10094566
I wish people could properly word things man

>>10094618
>"It's called lolita but NOT LIKE THE BOOK I SWEAR"
This is my least favorite thing that lolitas do. It happened at a meetup once. If a normie isn't asking you if its a fetish or has something to do with the book, going right off the cuff "ITS A FASHION AND HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH SEX STUFF OR THE BOOK" isn't helping us. it sounds like specific denial.

>>10094655
My community and most within it have a mutual agreement that when it comes to normies asking about the fashion. We call it a Japanese street style. Not lolita. It avoids that whole “ oh like the movie/ book?” Thing all together

>>10094687
honestly sometimes i still just call it lolita out of habit around normies and i can't think of a single time ive gotten "oh like the book/movie/sex thing". at the meetup the only reason i spoke is because a kind normie asked us why we were all dressed up and no one else spoke up for several seconds, they just stared at eachother awkwardly until i was the only one who spoke up.

>>10094166
>>10094166
>>10094362
I agree that we should “not care about normies” think in as much as we should not let anybody’s opinion become an obstacle. However I do think the exercise of analyzing our surroundings should not be mistaken as an act of insecurity. I feel that, if anything, it’s an important part of lolita.
I think that lolita fashion is kinda harmoniously disruptive. What I mean is that it clearly stands out and I think it’s supposed to. BUT it’s never una violent way, it disrupts the urban landscape in a very aesthetically refined and elevated form. The name “normies”, should be indication enough of how place ourselves as not “normal”. We stand out, we clash, and being aware of the context we oppose to can only be nurturing. I think.

>>10089645
I don't agree with all this, but I can confirm that the handful of people still actively using BTB in my comm all

> got old
> got fat
> had kids

Or all three, and are basically irrelevant and well past their peak.

>>10089645
Im ashamed to agree

>>10094562
Wayback machine

>>10094494
Pretty much this. I was western goth before I ever even heard of lolita.

>>10094774
Did you use it? There's only like 5% archived. I'm trying to make it more but it's too much.

>>10094494
I was a mallgoth before I was a lolita... I had an Emily the Strange T-shirt that I wore with a spiked dog collar, DIY bondage pants and black school shoes. Those were the days...

>>10094788
You've just taken me down memory lane anon!

>>10089443
Post her in the basic coord thread, then.

>>10094571
>>10094624
Other people in this very thread had no problem understanding it
That means that the problem isn't the wording
The problem is that two people in this thread passed eighth grade Reading with a D

>>10094788
Tripp pants for poor goths... man I remember saving lunch money just to save up enough to buy a authentic pair of Tripp bondage pants. The ones that had the zip off legs so you could make them shorts. And the straps getting caught on every fucking doorknob and drawer handle you walked past.

>>10094840
Not them, but holy shit same
I had to have the pair with neon green trim

>>10094837
rereading the original post, it is worded pretty badly.

>>10094840
I had a shit ton of demonia boots and tripp corsets at one point.
Ah, such times as a cyber goth.

>>10094788
The mall goth look is my other look when i'm not in Lolita. Still better than causal fursuiters, so i'm cool with whatever looks I get.

anyone want to place bets on when secrets will actually be posted?

I wonder if the reason we didn't have any last week or this week is that literally nobody submitted any

>>10095056
They didn't post the submission post last week though so nobody could have even if they wanted to

>>10094788
Hi, are you me?

I was the one who bought the honeycake jsk k8 was supposed to buy but kept stringing the seller along, inadvertently causing a shitstorm.

>>10095425
>the absolute mad lass

>>10095425
Wear it with pride and if you are ever in the same place as her, make sure she sees you rocking it.

>>10095425
Not all heros wear capes. If that where a gaming achievement, it would be platinum.

I saw a lolita posted to btb and she was being outed for being a 'little' so I sent her a message so that she might change her 'little' account usernames and figure out how to hide better.

>>10095425
wait what happened

>>10096335
some places call that cowtipping, asshole

>>10095350
It depends, did you DIY your bondage pants out of flared cargo pants, cut up dog leashes and a packet of safety pins too?

>>10096404
Skinny belts (black canvas or pleather), not dog leashes, but yes.

I'm pretty well known here, and people would know who I am by just my picture, but I'm trans and no one has ever suspected a thing.

>>10096335
Boo, you whore

>>10093841
My partner and I are the same way!
I think he's more drama hungry than I'll ever be.

>>10095425
Explain pls

I get a kick out of people here that think one person is posting my comms itas when It’s actually about three or four of us in our own discord sharing the images around. It’s like the cgl for our comm in there. The mods have no clue it’s us and don’t suspect a thing.

>>10096335
If she’s too dumb to know that she needed to make a clear separation between her fashion and her kinks from the start she deserves to be dragged through the mud.

>>10096335
This isn’t the first time semi was outed. I don’t think she cares. Could be using it for the attention, too. Who knows.

>>10096393
that doesn't matter here though

>>10096471
Is she that creepy adult hanging out in an all kids cosplay group? Or do I have her mixed up?

>>10096393
nayrt
Cowtipping is bothering someone for a humorous result, isn't it?

>>10096335
Whoever posted her should be ashamed of themselves.

>>10096555
No, it’s what other anon said, tipping the cow off about how people know about their shit, or at least that’s been the meaning for as long as I’ve seen it used.

>>10096597
Not the one who posted her but why have shame in outing someone who rps child fucking, especially when the fashion already has to deal with that stigma already?

>>10096607
Guess I need to lurk more. What's the harm in politely messaging someone?

>>10096614
Reduces the amount of drama they can milk from someone. It’s only really common curtesy on lolcow so it’s fair game everywhere else, but it ruins the “fun” for people that want to watch the spectacle unfold.

>>10096616
Oh, ew. People who perpetuate that lolcow bullshit sicken me. Even cgl dummies who feel the need to drag someone and completely tear them apart sicken me. Negative people breed negativity and bitching about strangers who aren't committing crimes is not funny if you really think about it. Sure, she's being dumb, but she's not flashing her bits or doing anything besides talking about a fetish in... gasp... a forum meant for people with that fetish.

>>10096613
She’s got a lot going on in her life right now and she doesn’t need this too

>>10096620
Besides the point. It could be anyone so why dwell on what she has going on. Main ideas are 1. she's 19 2. she's posting lolita dress pics on a ddlg forum and 3. she's talking about diapers. Her crime is being dumb enough to link the two.
Pic related - a reply from BtB a few months ago about a person who had the same thing happen and realized their mistake. It's a long read so tl;dr:

"DDLG is bad and I should have known but the hate didn't help me quit--therapy did."

>>10096619
From what I’ve heard she does in fact flash her bits...but only for paying “fans”

>>10096626
I can only hope she’s able to get to the same point this person did. Ageplay shit is gross but usually the littles have deep, underlying issues that need to be addressed rather than retraumatizing themselves. I really do hope she’s able to get help if this is the case instead of letting a few loud bitches make her dig her heels in further.

>>10096640
She definitely has some deep seeded issues. I’ve seen her in public and she is very touchy in an almost uncomfortable kind of way. Adding this into the mix has me thinking the worst. I really hope she gets some help.

>>10096651
>deep seeded
It's "deep-seated."

>>10096654
God thank you for being the one to point it out, I hate when people say/type that wrong. It makes everything they were trying to say sound so much less credible and more like what they think smart people talk like. Right next to "irregardless", "diamond dozen" etc

>>10096349
>>10096447
Ooops, I got it backwards. Well, shit....
Let me preface this that I am pretty much an unknown/nobody in every lolita circle. I'm a lone lolita and I'm pretty far removed from the lolita community as a whole. I'm not in any comms irl or otherwise.The most I do is post on /cgl/.
Apparently I bought it FROM k8 and it was goose who I unintentionally sniped it from.
Anywhats. From what I remember/was told, so if anything turns out to be untrue, this is just what happened from my perspective. I was an unwitting third party. k8 was trying to sell it to goose.
Goose wanted a payment plan that was something like $50 a month, but kept delaying the first payment.
K8 got fed up and posted in the BST thread and on LM.
I messaged k8 on LM about it to discuss buying it.
After agreeing to sell it to me, goose once again tried to do the payment plan, with k8 giving her another chance, but defaulted on the time for the first payment, prompting k8 to sell it to me.
Goose was raging in the discord and on the BST thread. But once people saw she wanted some weird ass payment plan vs me who would pay it all up front, people told her to stop crying.
I have a couple PM's on lacemarket from k8 about it, if anyone wants pics or it didn't happen, and I may have spoken to her through discord as well.
Still, my intention was to buy a dress. I wasn't trying to interfere with anyone because I knew who they were/I wanted to make drama... But, this whole debacle was how I came to know who these two were.
But I remember it was a whole being shit storm on /cgl/ because everyone knew who they were.

>>10096680
Don't remember this shitstorm desu.
But dang that Goose sounds terrible.
Didn't she also got banned from her comm recently? Or was that someone else?
What you did wasn't sniping it from her though, she was a non-paying douche that voided the sales agreement.
I can't stand people that flake out when they have to pay, and I can't blame the K8 for eventually selling it to someone else.
If Goose really wanted that dress she should have made her payments on time.
People like that are a waste of time, ughh.

>>10096724
Ayrt- it was july 2017 when it happened.(looked at LM pms)
But I was reading their names together in the influential people thread and I remembered who they were.

>>10095425
I’m in love with you, you are truly doing God’s work. Fuck k8 in her ugly ass

>>10096528
Yeah...the Pittsburgh comm is just problematic.

>>10096680
Listen, K8 and Captain K8 are 2 different ppl. K8 is lace founder and efame whore. The girl you bought from is Asian

>>10096769
Woah I fucked the photo. Anyways this is from lc

>>10096769
I bought it from kittyk8. Are they diff people, then? Man, I'm lost and confused. (Which is a constant for me anyway...)

>>10096770
Also thanks for the caps. I'm honestly surprised someone saved them.

Is it racist to think black girls look cuter in chocolate colors than white girls?

>>10096771
K8 is owls on lm

>>10096777
Well that's vaguely confusing. Thanks for clearing it up, though. All this time I though the k8 I bought one was the same one people kept talking about.
Which, honestly did surprised me because she seemed nice when I talked to her.

>>10096776
its only racist if you're white yourself.

>>10096776
>Understanding that color theory applies to skin color/tone and the clothes you wear is racist.
it's not racist. It's just basic color theory.

>>10096823
Why does it matter what race you are if you think it looks better on one skin tone then another?

>>10096779
K8 is girlyhoot here. She’s always associated with owls just for future references. But the k8 here is girlyhoot

>>10096463
I once posted some of our more obnoxious itas here and an ex-mod from my comm got blamed for it, which didn’t bother me because the ex-mod in question is a snooty rude bitch irl despite acting very uwu lovly~ online. It was funny to see that other people saw through her shit too even if they were wrong in that one instance. It ignited some drama and the ex-mod and her equally rude friend flounced from the comm. I don’t regret it, though it does annoy me that they probably feel like victims in the whole thing because they were falsely accused in this one instance, even though they’ve said way worse things about comm members irl while she was an active mod.

>>10097070
not them, but thanks for explaining
I've periodically taken breaks from /cgl/ over the last five years and there's tons of shit I don't understand but I'm too scared to ask about

I have a few people I’ve WANTED to post...but they ended up in there anyway without me having to get my own hands dirty.

>>10097293
I have a few people I want to post. But our mods are regulars here and I don’t want to get booted from our community for being rude to the newbies.

I don't actually hate bonnets, I just don't wear them because they give me shiba inu face

>>10096528
Wait wait...hold up. Is this for real? I don’t care what two consenting adults do in the bedroom but that sounds concerning given the circumstances.

>>10097303
Be proud of your shibe face, it’s adorable and you shouldn’t be ashamed of it.

>>10096776
Since when is color theory racist?

>>10097771
it's not racist, it's just bullshit

I guess this goes here:last week three sissies chatted me up at the bus stop and wanted to know where I get my clothes. Wanted to ignore them but they were all larger than me and I didn't want to deal with the consequences of enraging them, so I mumbled Lacemarket. They seemed happy that it's online. If you get a prospective buyer who is new, has no feedback, and comes over as aggressive and ignorant of the fashion, just tell them whatever you're selling probably won't fit. They're likely to leave bad feedback for not being able to fit their hulking frames into anything.

>>10098203
You can’t leave feedback if they haven’t bought anything. And if they did you can dispute it. I had to do that to someone when I told them that a listing of mine sold to another buyer and they left me negative feedback because it was “ my dream dress and they sold it to someone before me”.

>>10098236
How did they leave feedback if they didn’t buy it?

>>10098236
so you're basically saying someone bid on and won your listing, and you then told them that 'oh the dress is already sold to someone else'?

I had that happen with a purse, bid and won the auction only to get a message with 'sorry but I had this bag for sale on FB also and I already sold it to someone else' and while I didn't leave bad feedback for it I definitely sent a message back on how its not professional.

>>10098371
>>10098377
The girl that wanted it for “Dream dress” bought another thing from me (a pair of socks) just to leave bad feedback on another item she wanted to try and give me a negative on my feedback. I mean she bought the socks. I sent them to her and didn’t even know she was “eyeing” the dress till after it sold. She then said “ I was watching that dress and was waiting for a check to clear to buy it and you sold it to someone else!!!”. All I told her was that if she wanted it, she should have bought it or talked with me first about holding it till her check cleared. The fault was entirely on her and the mods sided with me. Girl has since removed herself from LM.

>>10098203
I would have told them milanoo and light in the box.

>>10098203
I always assume that men aren't going to fit in much on LM so I send them to custom sizing shops like SurfaceSpell and FanPlusFriend.

>>10098393
Hahahahaha oh my god what a petty stupid idiot.

>>10098377
a lot of people do that and sometimes aren't able to get to their other accounts to change the status. if it had been over a day then yes i understand your frustration but i've had buyers buy something from me 30 min after someone else did on another platform and it was because i was unable to get on my LM at the time

I feel uncomfortable around men and despise a major portion of them and I wish they would stay away from girly fashions like lolita. It doesn't suit them anyway. I'm willing to accept passing tgirls but the real ones are a small percentage,lots of them are sissies or agps in disguise

I wish you could out people who waste your time with holds, dumbass questions, and withholding information when it comes to selling. Like fuck you assholes I’m trying to sell my blouse not have a conversation or be fucked with.

I haven't worn lolita in 5 years because I gained a shit-ton of weight after my mom, dad and sister died within 2 years of each other and I just stopped doing things and binge ate like craze. like "went from healthy weight to morbidly obese" kind of weight gain. I've bought dresses and act like I still wear it with a few of my online friends who don't know how much I've actually gained. I finally started on a sensible diet and exercise program starting with the new year, but I feel like I've wasted years where I could have been wearing clothes I enjoy rather than baggy pants and t-shirts that fit.

>>10099422
If you were close to them, I can see how this could have been traumatic. You needed time to heal and recover. Don’t be so hard on yourself anon, forgive yourself and take your time.

>>10098393
Well that makes it an entirely different situation than what you first described and now I do agree that it was totally uncalled for of that girl. At least she paid for the socks and her bad feedback was rightfully removed!

The bag situation was less than a day but still a span of 14h. I sent the seller a message right after bidding that I'd pay the invoice as soon as I got it and my message was left on read for at least 9h.

>>10099449
Agree. These are getting less funny and extremely obnoxious by the post.

>>10099449
It wasn’t even that funny to begin with.

>>10096597
If anyone should be ashamed, it's you morons who coddle these sick fucks.

Keep ddlg out of the fashion and you won't end up on btb.
Duh.

>>10096619
Oh shut the fuck up, life isn't nice and lolita isn't lovely. If she wants to be a disgusting flashing ddlg whore then she's going to get dragged like one.

>>10099408
I agree. I'm not uncomfortable around men in general, but I don't want them in the fashion. It's a girls club, tgirls excluded. Make lolita penis-free again!

But then again I am a terf-lite.

>>10099408
Men are fucking horrible.
Watching them dress in lolita just makes it 100x worse.

>>10099408
Agree. Men are terrible and men in lolita are worse.
Passing men and acceptable looking t-women are the only exceptions
Other than that, dicks need to stay far away

Nun themed dresses make me so happy. I want them all.

I've started cutting and starving myself again.
I managed to stop for a while, but lately I've had this horrible dread and desire to just disappear.
I hate how I look in my dresses and a few don't fit right, which is causing major anxiety and depression.
I've starved myself all week just so I could fit into a dress tomorrow for my birthday, and to punish myself for even feeling hungry or thinking about food, I cut.
Now I can fit into the dress sort of, but I have ugly cuts and scars on my arms as a result. It makes me want to give up and just sell everything.

I feel fucking pathetic.
I hope that whoever reads this chews me a new one about how stupid I am for this.

>>10099475
Please get help, anon. I hope it all works out for you soon.

>>10099460
Exactly! She deserves to be dragged. I don’t understand how anyone can defend this. SHE IS MARKETING LOLITA IN GROUPS THAT FETISHIZE INCEST AND PEDOPHILIA. How is that not a cause for concern?

>>10099495
Everything gets fetishized so it’s no reason to talk about her like that
Even if she tells other dd/lg members about the shops isn’t that still just free advertising it’s still helping the community

>>10099556
Ageplayer defected

Get the fuck out

>>10099570
de·fect2Dictionary result for defect
/dəˈfekt/Submit
verb
past tense: defected; past participle: defected
abandon one's country or cause in favor of an opposing one.

Kinda the best word to use there.

>>10099495
beatingadeadhorse.jpg

>>10099556
We get it. You like pissing in diapers and saying "daddy give me cummies uwu"
You are gross and should feel gross.
Stop defending this shit.

>>10099556
I'd like to agree with you as I'm a kinkster myself, but there's apples, and then oranges. It's not a good thing to spoonfeed non-lolitas, especially littles and abdls, and invite them to prance around in lolita. More often than not they buy cheap shit and call it lolita fashion, or they do dumb shit in it and tell others they're a lolita.
Unless you're mentoring a kinkster and leading them to appreciate the subculture, and not just the dresses, you're just shooting yourself in the foot.
The best way to keep lolitas safe is to manage how much information kinksters have. Don't wear lolita around them if you're not ready to do some teaching.

Related story; I wore BtSSB to a kinky event a while back, and one of the resident crossdresser/sissies was spouting some nonsense about a local dance group doing a show with 'goth lolita costumes'. He said he wished he had dresses like that because they were so elegant and beautiful (mind you, these were Hot Topic tier trash outfits from the pictures he showed me). As soon as I mentioned wanting to talk to the group about sourcing some higher quality lolita pieces, he asked me if I liked 'goth loli'. I'll remind you I was in head-to-toe Baby.
Sissies have a skewed idea about what lolita fashion is.

>>10099584
There's nothing wrong with having a kink just because it's not yours doesn't make it wrong
Lolita is a style of clothing and the companies are able to stay open because people buy their clothes if she wants to help lead people to lolitacollective shes helping keep them in business and should be applauded for being so sure of herself instead of bashed for not fitting your norms
She has so much going on in her life but she's holding her head up and not deleting any of her content because she knows she's not in the wrong

>>10099475
i bet you're still fat lmao

>>10099408
I'm usually fine with men but not trans women. 90% of the self-proclaimed trans women I've met are sissies or autogynephiles. Most of the brolita men I've met are well dressed and if they can't behave themselves we kick them out, but if we try to boot a trans woman for being a creep they cry transphobia.

>>10099475
>not cutting your thighs so no scars mar your appearance
amateur.

>>10099617
You're 19. Do what you want, but stop dragging the rest of us into it.

How do you ditch ita friends?

>>10099662
Kill them.

>>10099671
Devour them.
They are the impure.

>>10099662
Sacrifice them to the dark lord
You will be cleansed of your sins and will find all of your dream dresses

>>10099661
Nobody is dragging anybody into anything

>>10099556
https://ko-fi.com/semirealbeing

buy her a coffee

>>10099707

>>10099723
I like seeing more oldschool and oldschool-inspired coords, but I still agree with this.

>>10099716
It's faster just to throw my money directly in the trash at home

>>10099732
She’s got a patreon now too

>>10096630
I mean she tried I guess

>>10099631
>autogynephiles

subtle

>>10099475
>>having to starve to fit into a fashion known for fatties

>>10099617
There's acceptable kinks and then there's pedophilia. Don't confuse the two. It's mentally unstable people who give bad reps to the fashion and kinks in general.

>>10099592
I honestly can't understand what the point of this garbage is or why you thought it was a good idea to post it. Are you expecting people to pat you on the head for trying to send random fetish people to brand stores?

>>10099617
Girl, can you be any more obvious? We don’t want your gross daddy fetish being mixed in with lolita. Keep that shit to yourself you dumb bitch.

>>10094369

don't use a whole wig then you walnut, hair extensions and half-wigs exist for a reason

>>10099617
What do you find ok about this?

>>10099652
this is what i used to do, i feel like people who cut their arms are crying for help/attention and the ones that seriously need help are the ones that cut in hidden places. for me it was thighs and the sides of my feet :'c

Are NC and diaper-Chan friends???

>>10099781
>wah wah the way i cut myself is better than the way other people cut themselves

>>10099787
Sorry that you're not just mentally ill but also an attention seeking whore.

>>10099475
stop cutting. its gross. it damages your body and looks horrible. You're better than that. get help

>>10099790
jokes on you, i don't cut myself. get some help, edge-chan

>>10099776
Wtf

>>10099782
makes sense. jenna is into some weird sexual shit herself. ie raceplay. ive seen proof

>>10099772
the point was to keep lolita away from random fetish people??? if your reading comprehension is bad, maybe you shouldn't be on a text-based website.

>>10099758
Or worse, autopedophiles like Stefonknee and Jonathan Yaniv.

>>10099840
We could start calling a freak a freak in community rules without ever mentioning the word trans.

>we are inclusive and welcoming to all but since this is NOT a kink community and we need to keep underage members safe, we ban littles and daddies, autogynephiles, autopedophiles, and sissies.

>>10099830
Details?!

>>10099845
https://kiwifarms.net/threads/paul-stefonknee-wolscht.15002/

>>10099845
https://kiwifarms.net/threads/jonathan-yaniv-jessica-yaniv-trustednerd-trustednerd-com-jy-knows-it-jy-british-columbia.49790/

>>10099617
The problem isn't the kink, the problem is when people bring their kink into a non-sexual space. It's perfectly fine to be a lolita who is also into kinky shit, but the lolita subculture itself is a non-sexual space and people need to acknowledge and respect that.

>>10096620
You mean this? I almost felt bad for her when I saw those comments she really pissed someone off

>>10099855
Well said.

>>10099847
They were talking about Jenna not these clowns

>>10096620
That still doesn’t excuse someone from being into child porn. C’mon anon. Grow some common sense. Hard times Befall everyone. It’s sucks. We all know. But being into something that is widely unacceptable doesn’t mean it goes ignored when you’re “ going through a tough time”.

>>10099861
Oh no! Not the presents. Porch pirates are a thing and have been a thing for quite some time. Either you know when your packages are usually delivered and be there to receive them to prevent pirates, or you have them dropped into a secure location to prevent said theft. Crying about having no presents on Christmas is selfish. The reaching for sympathy with the “ its been x years since x’s death” is kinda pathetic. I lost my father on thanksgiving. But that doesn’t mean every thanksgiving I’ll sit there and cry about not having my father and it being the “ anniversary of his death”. That’s just reaching for something to make others feel sorry for you for something that really isn’t something to feel sorry for.

>>10099626
Well I feel like I look like a whale, so I mean you might be right....

>>10099903
Nah, anon is just projecting. You're cute.

>>10099723
You're gonna have to fight me for that dress in particular

>>10099871
Yeah one of my very close family members died last year and while I'm sad, I don't bring it up constantly for sympathy points when people start talking shit.

>>10099861
I saw all the hooker comments lol I’d been following her and her cosplay group for a while but man did she piss someone off. She’s right, though, still pretty childish.

>>10099617
There’s definitely something wrong with being into ddlg. For your own sake, get therapy.

>>10099782
I want to know too. They look pretty buddied up.

>>10099617
Oh shut up Rachel. Stop dragging your weirdo buddies where they don’t belong. Take shits in diapers and “princess potty” all you want but don’t involve the fashion in your problems. The comm doesn’t need any more issues.

>>10100209
She fuck someone’s “daddy”? Lol

>>10099776
Why dos this make me feel sick?

I wish I could develop an eating disorder to lose weight. I wish I was a skinny teenager again. I wish I didn’t have to wear a waist trainer to look good in my lolita dresses. I’m disgusting.

>>10100304
Probably because it’s super gross. If you can’t have an intimate relationship with a SO without needing to pretend they’re you’re father/son/brother, there’s some serious issues going on. So nasty.

>>10100342
Eating disorder won’t help you in the long run. Starting a healthier routine and trying to find the cause of the weight gain is your best bet.

>>10100342
Do you also wish you could get cancer to lose weight? Don't be an idiot, if you want to lose weight, eat healthily, drink water, and exercise. Wishing for any illness to do it for you is a telltale sign of why you won't lose weight, because you're lazy.

>>10100342
>developing a lifelong mental illness that will ruin your body and result in a myriad of health issues to do something as simple as taking in less calories than you use

>>10100290
Daddy or husband lol

>>10099723
same. I'm so tired of the "oldschool with modern elements" thing. ugh. so ugly.

>>10098129
Two seperate arguments, color theory is not bullshit and black girls look great in chocolate coords (most of the time)

>>10097065
Because it was noticed and deemed worth mentioning I guess

>>10100371
I am lazy, I’m also short so it’ll take a diet of >1000 cals for it to make any different but you’re right. I just need to stop eating so much and I’ll stop being a fatty.

>>10100472
No one told you to starve yourself, losing weight takes time, patience and dedication. Cut junk food out of your diet as much as possible, replace candy with fruit and dark chocolate (if you absolutely must, and again, in small portions), replace soft drinks with water, and just move around more. Stick to it and you'll lose the weight, and you won't have to be sick to do it. I believe in you, anon!

>>10099723
everyone into old school is clout chasing, except me, I'm the real, true, old school lolita and you all are posers!

>>10099723
Jokes on you, I only got into old school within the last 4 months and have been buying up rare dresses and don't post online at all

>>10100472
I’m short too...but you should look into foods that are large portions for less calories or increase physical activity even slightly.

>>10099631
I understand this. Trans "women" on average are a lot more likely to be creepy and inappropriate than a random dude. They don't usually have dysphoria, they're just autistic incels unhealthily obsessed with female bodies.

>>10100477
I only need to lose 20 pounds but sometimes I feel like it’ll never happen. I feel suicidal sometimes because of how ugly my body is :( I’ll try my best anon. Because of my schedule I usually only eat once a day at 9pm, I need to cut back more.

>>10100503
I’m going to start going to the gym soon but I’ve never been so I’m scared. I feel like I’m too gross to even go to a gym.

>>10100506
Source?

>>10100524
I totally understand. I had 50 extra lbs on me after having my baby. But I’ve spent a year and am about 15 lbs from my goal weight: it’s a little difficult at first but if you keep it up for a few weeks it just becomes routine. I’m sure you can do it! :)

>>10100524
I feel you on the gym thing, Anon. I quit after a month because I felt so self-conscious. Try the pool? It's good for your joints and just about everyone has goggles+/a swim cap and we're all too busy trying not to drown so it's not like you're going to be judged lol
Good luck!

Bitch, you’re the most ita of them all!!!

>>10100728
She literally has a replica on her wardrobe post

>>10100717
I actually cannot swim at all, I had some traumatic incidents as a kid nearly drowning so I can't with pools. I think I'll find a gym thats 24 hours a day. If I go late maybe I won't be so self conscious.

>>10100730
*had, bitch fuckin deleted the wiki entry

>>10100731
Aw, sorry to hear that, Anon :(
A 24 hr gym sounds good! Just remember to be safe at weird hours! If you have the discipline, you might wanna check out some YouTube vids for at-home workouts that usually require minimal/no equipment

>>10100733
Oh you mean that Sugary Carnival special set that she tried to pass off as the real thing?
Even if it was real, she makes even brand look as cheap and poorly constructed as bodyline.

>>10100739
My mom is thinking of joining a gym and she wants me to go with her so there would be strength in numbers. I wouldn't go by myself. I tried youtube videos at home but I can't get motivated. Running and walking is boring but atleast I can zone out with a podcast. Doing at home youtube workouts, theres no accountability and its easy for me to just tune out and be lazy and switch to another video. I think at a gym, using equipment with headphones in, I'll be able to really get "in the zone". I actually can get a decent cardio workout playing DDR but I've played my game so much I am bored with it now.

>>10100478
Hardly. I don’t have an online presence in lolita, I’m just cheap and salty I can’t feed my shopping addiction as easily.

>>10100539
https://medium.com/@sue.donym1984/the-elephant-in-the-room-dc822144a81b

>>10092360
There's a couple of people that post lolita confessions on Amino consistently. Decoden Demon reminds me of the golden age of BtB. Then there's Lolita Confessions under llamapalooza that tries to be more positive. Nothing guaranteed but I predict Amino will be the future home of salt to some extent. I still have hope for a no-holds barred Facebook group.

>>10100885
If we did have a Facebook group, it would remove the anonymous option since you can’t post anonymously there. That’s why people like livejournal. You can be a troll or even say what you really feel without the repercussions of people knowing who you are. Many people also have comms that do not like drama being aired out publically and will remove you for venting your communities frustrations.

>>10099782
I want to know

>>10100728
She recently announced how shes “not going to be nice” with giving crit but really shes just being a cunt. All of her coords are nitpicks but her attitude is ita as fuck..she has this wierd need to be the center of attention and wont shut up about stupid shit like her anxiety or ugly rat dogs.

>>10100746
DDR has like 10 games for ps2, 5 for wii, and several more for other platforms as well. Get some new games. I think for some of the newer platforms you can even buy songs. They also have tons of customization for each song interms of speed and special shit.

>>10102003
I don’t have a wii, I have most of the ps2 games, I’ve just played then a ridiculous amount. Plus there’s only so much of a workout you can get on a slidey home pad.

Lame secrets this week at least last week had a little drama.

I love lolita fashion but I haven't worn it in months because I keep thinking of this incident that happened a while back. I was wearing something very casual and a girl I have never met before approached me and started asking me if I was into DDLG. She couldn't seem to comprehend that I just like the color pink and it has nothing to do with anything sexual at all.
I know that I shouldn't let some weird girl with no sense of boundaries affect me like this but it seriously freaked me out. Wearing lolita, I got used to people pointing and staring at me or taking pictures when they think I'm not looking. Of course those things bother me, but they didn't stop me from wearing what I love. But I cannot stand the thought of random strangers having weird sexual thoughts about me. Yeah, as a woman, being sexualized isn't new to me. I've been catcalled or hit on just like every single woman I know. But the idea that random people on the street, especially men, would look at me and assume I have this really specific, disgusting, and degrading fetish just makes me want to puke.
I feel like I'm a weak person for caring too much about what other people think. I really wish I wasn't so weak and I wish I didn't care so much. It's just gotten to the point that if I wear my frilly dresses in a public space, I feel so anxious I can't enjoy myself anymore. I feel like it's not worth it anymore and that makes me really sad.

>>10102677
>But I cannot stand the thought of random strangers having weird sexual thoughts about me
you know that this is going to happen no matter what you're wearing, right? unless you're prepared to become a hermit. you definitely need to work on not caring so much what others are thinking because you can't do anything about it even if they are thinking sexual things about you.

>>10102737
I think it sounds less like she cares about being sexualized in general, but sexualized for that specific kink bothers her.

>>10102737
I love people thinking of me sexually, but not in an incest/pedophilia kink kind of way. That makes me feel a bit gross even though I know there’s nothing I can do about it. It just sucks that this ddlg kinksters try to make people think Lolita and their kink are the same kind of thing.

Help. I'm in love with this precious tartan amputee from Lor's G-anime video.
>tfw no missing doll parts gf

>>10102677
big mood

>>10102737
I like how she did everything she could to specify that she doesn't mean "being sexualized period," and you just flat out ignored it so that you could tell her she's wrong anyway

>>10102652
Yeah this week was lame

>>10100484
>last 4 months
>have been buying up rare dresses
You have no idea what rare means, do you? Just because it's very old doesn't mean it's equally rare.

i am always mindboggled by the fact that people can remember what their dresses are called

i can remember what many of my prints are called because they're thematically named but with nonprint items/basic items it's anyone's guess and it doesn't matter how much i paid for them

Lolita fashion has turned me into a monster. Ive become a narcissistic, attention seeking cunt. I’ve driven most of my friends away, and become addicted to toxic drama related websites. I’ve done so many horrible things and I can’t feel anything anymore. I love wearing my pretty dresses but at this point all I can feel is shame.

>>10107964
At least you've realized that there is a problem, that's the first step to becoming a better person.
My advice, for what it's worth? Continue wearing the fashion you love, but wean yourself off the drama sites, including /cgl, unless you have the willpower to come here and just participate in the non-drama threads. Keep in mind that attitudes and opinions expressed here and on other drama sites does not represent all lolitas as a whole.