/cgl/ - Cosplay & EGL

Time for a fatty greentext story
>Be me at con, going back to my hotel room to change out of my cosplay and into my rave gear
>don't want to walk, know I'll be too drunk to drive so I bring my longboard with me
>in the lobby with longboard, about to head out the door when I see a group of girls about to leave also
>2 qt's and a landwhale
>they come up to me and say they saw me at the con earlier in the day and compliment my board
>ask if they can ride it
>I say sure why not (assumed Moocow didn't want to)
>qt #1 rides my board with no problem at all (she owned her own)
>qt has a little trouble but I hold her hand and walk her along through the parking lot
>Moocow asks to ride
>not wanting to jeopardize my chances with the qt's i reluctantly let her ride
>moocow literally jumps on my board, says she's got this
>doesn't use correct riding stance at all, literally puts both feet together in the dead middle of my board
>I can see the wood bending and hear creaks
>fatty starts to go down a mild hill in the parking lot
>falls off my board and straight on her ass and makes a thud sound but almost hear the sound of her fat
>no seriously, drop a pile of ground beef onto an asphalt road and that's what it sounded like
>Moocow lets out a shriek
>suddenly gets pissy about how I let her go on her own when I helped her friend out
>"you said you had this"
>"bet if I was a skinny brunette like my friend you wouldn't have a problem running along side me just in case"
>her friends scorn her for being vindictive and leave
>see them at the rave, and the next day
>try to get them away from fatty so I can make a move but fatty wouldn't budge the whole weekend
>mfw

Fucking landwhales, ruining everybody's good time