/cgl/ - Cosplay & EGL

where is this image from?

I've just learned more about how women are taught from young age to view themselves through male gaze, for example judging our own attractiveness. But many of us think we only wear lolita fashion for ourselves and not for men.
Do you still find aspects in lolita that you view through male gaze? Or is lolita fashion just magically excluded?
I personally recognize the toxic male gaze in me when dressed in normie clothing. I wonder if me wanting to be skinny and having a pretty make up in lolita is part of male gaze.

>>10255817
Lolita groups usually don't give a fuck if you're a guy as long you show a serious interest in wearing the fashion while being atleast a half-decent human being.
Maybe you creeped them out somehow?

Or you joined a group that expects you to atleast own a full coord or have basic knowledge on the fashion and you showed you don't know anything.

>tfw cosplay is finally earning me money
>tfw using that money to buy Bodyline costumes for cam because none of them appreciate my lolita

I've only ever had one bf and an element of our relationship I really like is that he isn't into Lolita. He's not hostile or against me doing it; he rolls his eyes everytime he drives me to a tea party. But I like that he's not into it because I've heard so many creepy stories about guys who like it a little too much in the wrong way. My bf will even buy me dresses for birthdays if I literally send him the link. What is "cute" though is over time he has gained a sense of what my Lolita style is. So if I send him a link where there are multiple colorways to choose from, I don't need to tell him which one to get.

Another thing that's funny is he's disinterested in dressing up. Until he notices a fancy dandy or kodona at the tea party drop off / pick up spot. Then he mutters "that guy looked kinda cool maybe i should get a waist coat or something i don't know~"

I actually have a bf that's really indifferent towards Lolita fashion and I love him for it. He doesn't object to me spending money on things that make me happy, he's just not interested. And where this is "great" is that it means I always have a non-bias eye to run potential purchases by. He's picked up on the difference between what is Lolita and what counts as Ita and understands what I'm going for; so I show him stuff I'm considering and he gives me a frank, layman's opinion.
Common Insights include:
>If it were bigger or smaller it would look better.
>That's too dumb. It's just too much and people will notice it's weird.
>For Lolita, that works well. I think.
>It looks like something you would wear.

>>9702883
I don't have a car payment, scholarships and loans pay for my living and school. I lived with my parents for the first two years of my degree and worked through high school so I had 10k in savings when I moved out. I budget out my money and save up slowly, I buy only used brand, usually damaged. I do odd seeing jobs for other students, like repairing rips and sewing on buttons. I won't be able to afford any new releases or prints right now though. At least once I get through school I will make over 100k a year so I have can all the burando I want.

Relationship question + Storytime

>The Question
In the case of partners that don't have strong opinions about Lolita Fashion, does your partner have one favorite dress (favorite might be a strong word; tolerate or think is "kinda nice") or one dress they really dislike out of your current/past collection?

>Storytime
My bf is very "bleh" about Lolita. He thinks the subculture is hilarious though and always enjoys a good dramatic re-telling of seagulls mercilessly ripping reach other apart while shrieking "Mine, Mine!". Out of my dresses, he thinks my preference for classic grandma sofa is fitting to my personality but otherwise has no strong opinions... Until now... I bought candy sparkle. And he hates it. He really, really hates it with a passion. He literally has zero opinions otherwise, but now has become very open about; "This, this isn't you - It's diabetes. It looks like something your friends would wear. Why would you ever buy this?". And somehow I find this... Really funny. Like, going from no interest to "I hate it" is just hysterical.

Old thread >>9475203

Post here for coordinate advice!

I saw deka wanko was posted once in a thread similar to this! The post convinced me watch it (plus it was pretty short already), and I liked it. The main character is pretty cute!

>>9271147
Geez that lace choice. If someone told me this was from milanoo I would actually not question it.

>>9027448
>mfw I love AP skirts to bits but I'm way too fat for them

Old one >>8553612

>had brithday this month
>co-worker shows me awesome bruno banani blazer for 100 bucks
>tell my boyfriend how I might want to buy it later
>"Why don't you use your birthday money? You could need some more office clothes instead of all those special occasion dresses."
>Can't tell him I'm saving up for expensive dream dress
>Say I don't want it that bad

>>8554614
11/?

>Good feel
>Just won an auction for a really pretty brand dress for dirt cheap
>Can't wait to wear it and feel all pretty

>Bad feel
>I keep thinking about this AP dress I have
>Posted about it here before
>girl lent it to me, then cut off all contact when it came time to return it
>no idea why, but her boyfriend dumped her and she deleted all social media and wouldn't return text messages.
>literally no way to return it since I don't know where she lives
>It's been years now
>Still feel like I stole it and don't have the heart to wear or sell it.
>Everytime I get a new dress, I think about this one and it makes me feel like I'm a bad person.

>>8261432
You came to 4chan to get an idea of how a fashion subculture behaves? That's like going to look at a gang to get an idea of how teenagers behave.

>>8209473

>>7976339
If you are of legal age, yet don't know how to properly lurk and adapt to a place, then you probably don't belong here. Sorry.

>Are you posting?
Probably, depends how lazy I am (very)

>Have you posted before?
Nope, I'm a fatty chan so I was thinking of doing a "~look at a plus size lolitas wardrobe~" as I have nice pieces and I'm tired of seeing other girls moaning how they can only wear reps. I'd love to see some other plus size girls wardrobes too!

>How much has your wardrobe grown in the past year?
Quite a lot! I've sold quite a few pieces too but I've brought a lot more than I've sold. I'm making more of a shift towards classic now

>number of main pieces/blouses/shoes/bags/etc
Main pieces: 20+ (all burando or good indie burando)
Blouses/Cutsews: 5
Shoes: 7
Bags: 7+
Outerwear/Knitwear: 6
Accessories: Too many to be healthy

>Is your wardrobe cohesive or a hot mess?
Cohesive. I use the same colours a lot and I feel everything matches well. It's useful because when I buy a new main piece I don't have to get anything else to go with it.

>Estimate how many coordinates can you pull from your wardrobe
Around 60 at least? I have quite a few plain colour items that are really versatile

Met some cool airforce guys in the lobby of my hotel. I think this is going to be a good con.

Even though I can't get into my room because the person whose name it's under is over an hour late.

I'm not going to complain, though. Free hotel room.

(pic related, how the airforce guys felt when I first struck up conversation)

>>7692640
I dunno, really. Events of all kinds just kinda make me nervous, haha. I'll get over it once I'm actually there, though. But I'm also really nervous about my coord... Something really awesome, but not too eyecatching. Last time I went into the city I went all out and got harassed to the point where I missed my bus so many people were trying to grab me/my dress/my hair. I think the reason for that was there was some sort of game? Hockey or something? A lot of the people were either foreigners or drunk guys in jerseys.

>>7692695
pic related, what I was going to post. They're right next to each other so I must have clicked the wrong one, lol.

>>7693065
From what I heard, the store is really small, so I'm honestly not sure...

>>7333974

>>7258720