/cgl/ - Cosplay & EGL

I'm leaving to a convention today. I've gained 40 pounds since last convention, so I barely fit into my old cosplays. I lost my wig cap, there's no store in town that sells them. Broke my prop last minute, never really finished my wig, accidentally threw away my shoes because they started to smell. I have no money, no food, nothing prepared. I feel ugly as sin unless I'm in cosplay. Friend wants to volunteer and I'm scared out of my end to not be in cosplay while volunteering, scaring everyone with my ugly disease. I feel like there's a part of my head that's saying that something super bad is gonna happen, like someone taking a picture of my half assed cosplay, posting it on /cgl/, and I become the next PT. I hate myself, and I honestly don't want to cosplay, but I put $200 into my cosplay so far and I don't want it to go to waste, so I'll at least wear it to the photo shoot.
Oh yeah, and I'm packed up the ass with panels I have to cart around too because my friend wants to go to them. I feel like it's not going to be fun, and I'm already having anxiety attacks before the convention starts. I'm going to have to pack a whole shit ton of xanax before I leave. Does anyone else have these feels? I feel like I'm the only one who dreads a convention.