/cgl/ - Cosplay & EGL

oh i posted this in a dead thread

I was into lolita pretty briefly, though I still hang around here to keep up with the community. I dropped out a few years ago, and all the friends I've made in the community have been worried sick or even angry.

I've been taking care of my elderly mother. The stress has been driving me crazy, and I don't even have the time between two jobs and college to dress up anymore. I don't really want to tell them what's been keeping me out of there because I don't want to pity play.

Having to dust cobwebs off of my dresses has been the worst hell, and I feel like I can't do anything I want to or get my life moving while I'm stuck out here taking care of her. But I can't just walk away, either; I don't have a lot of savings(her medical bills and addictions take most of our money) and no real connections to land me a place to go, on top of her guaranteeing me she'd commit suicide the moment I left. I don't even know if I'd fit in those dresses anymore either, I've put on a few pounds.

I've made so many attempts to get her set up nicely with a caregiver and myself out of here, but it always explodes due to horrible circumstance. Just a few days ago my roommate-to-be vanished, leaving a suicide note, and I haven't heard from him at all. I don't want to be stuck out here another year.


Thanks for letting me rant, /cgl/. I'm going to go get smashed.