/cgl/ - Cosplay & EGL

>>10028827
I found a man in a farm once.
>grew up in the country
>walking along the edge of a field in my first lolita dress
>IW, Pietro Angel JSK
>basic af beret coord but jsk looks cute with my boots
>hear a muffled "Hey lady, help! hey lady" from nearby
>look around and don't see anyone
>"in the ground, lady"
>under this plant?
>"yeah here, please pull it up"
>pull plant
>it's really hard
>plant is smooth and slippery
>hard to get grip
>he's moaning
>god this probably hurts him
>tell him I'll get a shovel
>"please lady I don't have much left here just pull"
>pull more
>fucking hell this is hard
>feel like I'm doing battle with mother earth but if there's a guy stuck there I'm going to help
>finally it's like the earth itself moans
>plant gives way
>sticky earth flies everywhere
>moment of happiness, I saved the guy
>he gives me a shit eating grin
>"Thanks lady, you're real good at that"
>realise I wasn't holding a plant after all
>pulled him up by the dick
>scream and let go
>realise there's dirt on my first brand dress
>get really mad
>ask him if he's gonna pay for it
>"Lol you think money grows on trees? ask my mom bitch"
>slaps me with his dick and walks off
And that's how my first brand dress was ruined by a fucking onion. And no, the farmer did not believe me and did not pay for it.