/cgl/ - Cosplay & EGL

Growing up I was never pretty. My mother was pretty and my older sister was pretty but I was always sort of plain. They both seemed very glamorous to me growing up, especially my mother. I guess you could say she was a 'kept woman'. My father was much older, and slightly more well off than most. She always had a full face of makeup, got her hair bleached blonde, sun tanned, expensive perfume, the works. So I guess you could say femininity has always sort of intimidated me. I just never thought I could be beautiful so I covered myself up in t shirts three times too big and ripped jeans and just hoped no one would notice me. But I always secretly wanted to be beautiful. It sounds childish but I love fairytales. I love sparkles and magic and frills and pink. I love all of that shit. I just feel like on me it would look...silly. I want to be a swan but to be honest I'm pretty sure there wasn't a mix up and I really am just an ugly duckling. I'm trying to work on it though. I've been practicing makeup and I'm growing out my hair. I just don't have the confidence to buy cute clothes and actually wear them. I'm not really even sure how to build up a wardrobe. Everything I own is frumpy and black, I'm pretty sure I'd have to dump most of it just because it's so old and falling apart. I'm mostly interested in general J fashion, I really like Larme and Mori too. But I'm not sure what to focus on.


Sorry for the rant

How necessary is eye makeup for lolita? I'm so blind that even when I put my face two inches from the mirror I still can't see well enough to apply anything. I've tried doing it with my glasses on too-- it's impossible