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/biz/ - Business & Finance

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3389211 No.3389211 [Reply] [Original]

Hi, I'm Scott. Let's talk business.

>> No.3389222
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3389222

Hello Scott, my name is Riya. It seems the annual perpetuity is down 5% today. Not good news, what do you suggest?

>> No.3389224
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3389224

>>3389211
>>3389222
What coin is this?

>> No.3389236

>>3389222
Yes, this is very bad news Riya. Let me take a look at my portfolio... Hmmm...it says right here the residual exponential growth should resurface at an annual rate of 3.25% in the next 24 hours. Hopefully we can keep in touch. Oh by the way, my name is Darnell.

>> No.3389246
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3389246

>>3389236

>> No.3389261
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3389261

>>3389246
Ni hao Darnell, I am Zhao Zhi. That seems like a solid evaluation of the market fluctuation value. However, I would like to input the Asian transaction influence. It seems the Chinese market has been fluctuating at a perpetual value of 3-5% error resistance value. I suggest that we correct for any market transactional fees and invest into the east asian market. Please let me know, thank you.

>> No.3389268

>>3389224
Oh man, that made me Kek way more than it should have. Thanks, anon.

>> No.3389275

Comfy thread, OP.

>> No.3389292
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3389292

>>3389261
Zhao Zhi, I will have to be quick as I am on my way to a conference call. Based on your east asian evaluation, it seems that any future institutional resistance will entail a drop in 6-7% annual gross mean drop. I find this too unstable for our market climate and suggest we invest instead in the south american market. The average mean statistical value has remained at a constant 2-3% of the annual domestic prediction. What are your thoughts?

>> No.3389304
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3389304

>>3389292
Woof. Woof woof woof. Awooo.

>> No.3389313

Sorry team just got a call from HQ seems we've been hacked by autistic NEETs aaaaand it's gone. Everything the money the prestige the pretending to be white. Sorry squad. Gtfo

>> No.3389324
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3389324

>>3389304
Yes that is a good point. However, I think we should wait and test out the waters of the future market climate. If you could send over those evaluations from last week I would love to double check those annual predictions. Hope to keep in touch in the future, let me know if you have any more questions.

>> No.3389331
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3389331

You've overbusinessed me.

>> No.3389341
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3389341

>>3389324
Derrick, I'm a little concerned by these statisical projections for the next quarter. If your numbers are correct, it is forecasted that we will lose a growth overall profit of over 50%? This is very shocking news, I'm going to have to get my senior analyst to double check and confirm those numbers. This is very concerning, very concerning. Keep in touch.

>> No.3389362

Finance seemed like the dream field for me until I got a job and realized it was filled with normies that have no idea what they're doing and beauracracy up the ass.

>> No.3389364
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3389364

>>3389341
Mr. Hauffman, I've just checked over those evaluations that you've sent me. It seems the projections are indeed correct, and that we will expect a quarterly loss of almost 65%. This is very disconcerting news...What is our course of action going forward?

>> No.3389377
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3389377

>>3389364
Thank you Sarah for finishing the statistical analysis on our future projected earnings. Based on this very troubling news, I am calling an annual board meeting tomorrow afternoon in the conference room. I expect to finalize a solution and create a five point plan to stabilize our financial situation moving forward. Please send out this memo to the rest of the office.

>> No.3389411
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3389411

Mr. Bateman, I've just checked our quarterly statistics and noticed a statistical anomalie indicating that 'doubles' occur significantly more often than was previously expected.

I expect this to have an impact on our performance as many of our end-users will be attempting to check these supposed 'doubled'.

Do you have any input on this matter?

>> No.3389416
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3389416

>>3389411
Fuck you for derailing my thread.

>> No.3389433
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3389433

>>3389416
Sorry about that Mr. Johnson. I will leave the checking of our numbers to other users from now on.

>> No.3389435

>>3389411
check'd

>> No.3389437
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3389437

Team, great news. I'm happy to say we're looking at a total 1% return on today's trades as of closing. Time to bring out the bottles. Riya, on the pole.

>> No.3389439

>>3389433
mother fucker

>> No.3389454

>>3389433
kek and check

>> No.3389463
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3389463

>>3389433

Mr. Blackbeard, it appears that your post number has been found to have repeating digits. I have checked them for you and am now registering it in the kekdatabase.

>> No.3389476
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3389476

>>3389411
Chek'd

>> No.3389477
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3389477

>>3389437
>>3389463
Oh boy, I've been waiting all day for this. The drinks are on me this time, team. Cheers to our success with repeating digits in this novel market!

>> No.3389510

>>3389411
>>3389433
nice

>> No.3389558
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3389558

We've received some good news lately. Due to a significant increase in shareholder interest, our dividends are up 555% year-to-date.

This will enable us to pursue additional future enterprises with the capital gains that we have now realized. We will post a press prelease later today with updated information on how users can inspect these amazing gains.


We will no longer only be able to serve the big guys in the field, and can now mask our enterprise with a more professional vision.

-- Bateman, Patrick, Vice President