/biz/ - Business & Finance

[Anonymous No.990085]

I got caught lying on my resume

>be in school for 2 years
>graduate but can't find a job, can't even get an interview
>go unemployed for nearly 7 months, last date of my employment was nearly 3 years ago
>make up some some shit on my resume saying I was a temp. laborer for the past few months to make me seem less pathetic, I didn't think anybody would care enough to check
>finally get a job interview, it goes great
>background check finds my lies
>they call me I try to explain myself while feel like crying
>application terminated

Is suicide the only remaining option?

[Anonymous No.990090]

>>990085
The problem wasn't that you lied. It was that you didn't lie enough. You need to lie to the extent that you can get multiple job interviews. Why half ass it if you're coming over to the dark side?

[Anonymous No.990098]

>>990090
>You need to lie to the extent that you can get multiple job interviews. Why half ass it if you're coming over to the dark side?

This.

You need the lie THE FUCK out of your memesume.

Literally think of such retarded lies that people will think "I doubt this guy is pathetic enough to lie about this, no point checking". That's how you gotta think my man.

Besides how the fuck could they even check you didn't work there? Let me guess, you used an actual company name? Smdh you should have made one up that sounds legit or closed down.

[Anonymous No.990103]

You just need to bark back.

>they call you to call you on your shit
>reply, "Are you kidding me? I don't have time to do your fucking job for you" *click*
>call them back
>say, "Oh yeah, fuck you" *click*

Works every time

[Anonymous No.990122]

>>990085
>>application terminated

ooohhh that's terrible!!

[Anonymous No.990181]

dumb faggot