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/biz/ - Business & Finance

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911376 No.911376 [Reply] [Original]

I have a phone interview tomorrow. I don't want to fuck this up.

Post interview questions and responses.

>> No.911384

Who is your waifu?

How big is your dick?

What's the circumference of your asshole? (In mm)

>> No.911407

>>911384
Where do you keep petty cash?

Can I get paid prior to my start date (if I get the job of course)?

Is your wife as sleazy as they say on craigslist

What relation to the artist was whistlers Mother?

>> No.911412

Good thing to do is lie out your ass and make it seem like you were born to do this job. Tell 'em whatever job you're applying for was your grandpa's hobby, tell 'em your hobbies are things that relate to the job, exaggerate the experience you have or at the very least play it up, and be confident.

>> No.911414

>>911376
If someone came in to interview with me and just said they would show up every day on time and if something came up, they would call before hand ... I would hire them on the spot.

What kind of job are you interviewing for?

>> No.911421
File: 131 KB, 249x250, 1437082949620.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
911421

>>911376
>had first phone interview
>Basic company employer, doing a general reference and skills check
>Everything goes well, I apparently "pass" and she refers me to the HR department about a week and a half later
>HR contacts me and the second phone interview goes smooth as silk. All main points were highlighting, company history, departments, mission statement, and sister companies were all highlighted and referenced. Had a good back-and-forth conversation going throughout it. She complimented me on asking some good questions. Nailed the horrible "How much are you willing to be compensated" question.
>She implies that she'll contact me again for a third, in-person interview
>She sends me a formality e-mail with her contact information in case I had any other questions
>Reply with a "thank you for the interview" kind of response
>>Think 'wow interviews are so easy why is everyone making such a big fuss about them?'

>3 weeks go by
>An bot e-mail by the company was sent to me; didn't even make it to my inbox but was flagged as spam
>Thank you for your interest in [company]. Unfortunately you aren't a candidate fit for this position

Moral of the story, phone interviews are easy on purpose and don't mean jack shit

>> No.911446

>>911414

It's a sales advisor for a solar panel installation company

>> No.911453

>>911376
Tell them, "Hold on a sec.....I'm getting off the phone with Warren Buffett."

>> No.911487

>>911376
Jack Daniels can help you with that.

>> No.911532

>>911407

10/10 lol'd hard

>> No.911542
File: 15 KB, 600x400, 1367416117964.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
911542

>Tell me about yourself

>> No.911571

Bump

>> No.912037

Thought I'd give you faggots an update.

Job seems really easy. Basically calling warm leads asking them if they still want solar panels. Then hand them off to the sales team.

This is exactly how my interview went:

1. Was told story about the company 10 min
2. Asked if I had questions 30 seconds
3. Asked me why I was interested in sales 1 min
4. Asked me 1 question about my resume 1 min
5. Was offered in-person interview 30 sec

I don't really care its a $30,000 base salary + commissions for talking on the phone

>> No.912038

>>911421
wow, you don't say, fuckass. what other riveting tales that no one is familiar with will you share with us.

>> No.912039

>>912037
Good job then! I was going to post some stuff since I recently completed a technical phone interview with a big name software firm, but seems like you're good

>> No.912046

if there a schoolbus full of niggers and you have to suck everyones dick and you take 5 minutes to suck them off, how many dicks have you sucked in 3 hours?

>> No.912056

>>912037
>solar panel sales
Are you the most senior member yet? It's the bottom of the "technical" sales barrel and everyone quits in a week.

>> No.912162

>>912046

How many people in the school bus total?

>> No.912206

I've heard if you take a shit while doing a phone interview it will make you sound more comfortable.

>> No.912279

>>912206

Whoever told you this is retarded

>> No.912291

>>911421
nothing means jack shit. i've had interviews that went really well where i got no callback and ones where i went in sleep-deprived and rambled like a retard but got an offer