/biz/ - Business & Finance

[Anonymous No.8995103]

Today is the keynote guys, I am feeling bullish here. Lots of good things to come.

[Anonymous No.8995182]

>>8995103
wheres bedtime story

[Anonymous No.8995195]

Ropsten

[Anonymous No.8995214]

>pluchie_pepe.png

[Anonymous No.8995227]

>>8995182
Here you go fren

[Anonymous No.8995231]

>>8995103
what keynote?

[Anonymous No.8995233]

>>8995103
lol. dumbass. theres no keynote. just a bunch of red in your blockfolio when you wake up.

[Anonymous No.8995429]

>>8995231
Ropsten announcement. Next stop main net.

[Anonymous No.8995597]

Stop posting lies, there is nothing coming today

[Anonymous No.8995652]

what time is keynote

[Anonymous No.8995800]

>>8995652
Came for this

[Anonymous No.8995801]

>>8995227
God damn :,)

[Anonymous No.8996666]

>>8995103
There is no keynote. wtf are you talking about.
Am in all LINK channels.
>all in link hodler

[Anonymous No.8996705]

>>8995195
Porn set

[Anonymous No.8996767]

>>8995182
Once upon a time but not far from our own, Sergey of Nazarov took all the LINK Marines from this forsaken planet on a mission to Lamboland.
Sergey masterfully brought the spacecraft to the moon, near a base called Crypto Marketcap. The LINKers looked out at the surface in amazement. NEO and BTC were there and established a luxurious settlement. Sergey turned off the engine and left the ship.
Many LINKers got off and excitedly began buying things. The women here were 10x as beautiful as those on Earth! The restaurants were all Michelin Star. The cars sparkled like the sun.
A little Linklet with 10,000 LINK had just barely made the cut. He clutched his stack nervously. He can’t afford to sell a single LINK. Is this it? Where did Sergey go?
“Who cares where Sergey went! We’re the richest people on the Moon!”
LINKers speculated Sergey went to find The Corporations. Linklet remained on the ship, waiting before selling his LINK to see if Sergey would return. The majority of the LINKers have left the ship, having made it with their iron hands.
“What are you doing Linklet? Hurry up and sell before the price plummets!” Many LINKers excitedly spent their LINK on luxuries and returned to earth with their treasures.
Linklet felt stupid and left out on the ship. Only the outliers were left - the Linklets like him who have no choice but to hold longer, and those with unspeakable amounts of LINK that can afford to wait. Less than 10% of the LINKers remained on the ship.
Unexpectedly, Sergey returned to the ship one day. The remaining marines were surprised. Sergey seemed just as surprised so many of the people who shared his vision had immediately sold out. The ones left... were the True Marines.
Suddenly, a new crew member boarded the ship. Sminem arrived.

[Anonymous No.8996781]

“I’m done refueling the ship,” Sergey said. Sergey did not say anything more. Sminem took his place as copilot.
Within minutes, the ship took off again.
“Oh shit,” Linklet thought. A second singularity!
Soon, the ship began tearing through space faster than ever. The structure began to rumble. Outside the window, Linklet saw flashes of green light zip past the hull.
“This is your captain speaking, we’re experiencing some Parabolic Growth.”
Linklet gripped the armrest. His breath quickened.
Then... Sergey switched gears - and they entered warp speed.
In a blaze of green arrows, the space outside transformed into a bright green tunnel. Inside the wormhole, Linklet could see all of time pass through his eyes. He felt like he had seen the face of God.
“AAAAAAAAAAA!!!” Linklet screamed. The sheer epicness drew tears from eyes. We’re going where no one has been before!
And then, Sergey landed. Outside was a whole other dimension. It was as if Asgard, Heaven and every single meme in the world had a threesome and given birth to the most indescribably awesome place. One would need to develop an entire new sense organ just to experience it.
Lamboland.

[Anonymous No.8996799]

>>8995182
Linklet could not believe he was even worthy of this place.
“All of this is yours to enjoy.” The women here were as beautiful as every myth conceived. The Lambos here were so cutting edge they did not even exist on the earthly plane. There was enough sex for one man to last a thousand lifetimes. Linklet fell down to his knees.
“ I have prepared for each of you a Mansion of Financial Freedom. Take care of it. But of the tree in the center, you must not eat. It is the Tree of Nigger Rich.”
The marines gathered around the tree and observed the black, squealing fruits of La Cretura.
“I am off now to the corporations. Enjoy this paradise.” And Sergey left.
Linklet could see this was a paradise especially made for the marines, and everyday it expanded bigger and bigger. Some marines frolicked in the garden of NEETs, developing VR. Others pursued infinite wisdom. Still others returned to earth to pursue their careers, but returned to lamboland at night to spank bitches.
Linklet enjoyed moderate things. He had more than enough money, but found pleasure in meditating and reading. Once in a while he found himself meditating under the Nigger Rich tree. Sometimes when he stared off into space, he found himself looking directly at the Nigger Rich tree.
One day, a strange lady was there, staring at him.

[Anonymous No.8996811]

>>8995182
“Why don’t you taste the Nigger Rich tree?” said the lady.
“No thank you, ma’am,” said Linklet.
“Just touch it. Hold it in your hand,” said her.
“Who are you?” said Linklet.
“I am Social Media,” said the lady. “These ladies here in Lamboland are wholesome, but I will introduce you to another breed of women.”
Linklet was inexperienced with women, but it did sound enticing to attract any women.
“Come,” said Social Media, “don’t you remember your high school classmates? And your family? Wouldn’t it feel amazing to have followers worship your riches?”
“I am already very wealthy,” linklet said, “but I do suppose I should enjoy life a LITTLE.”
“What is the point of being rich if other people didn’t know about it?” said the lady. She plucked a fruit from the tree. “Don’t you want to live the life of a rockstar, or a Kardashian?”
She handed the fruit over to him.
“Just spend some time looking at the models on Instagram tonight and hold this fruit in your hand. You don’t have to eat it.”
Linklet knew he did not have the hundreds of thousands of LINK other marines had, but if he just held a little longer, perhaps start a business, he could have all the benefits of the Tree. On the other hand, he had never seen such a large number in his bank account.
That night, Linklet posted a photo of his Lamborghini on his page.

[Anonymous No.8996821]

>>8995182
At first, no one seemed to care. Frustrated, Linklet went out to buy a few designer clothes. It was only a couple hundred, he thought. He asked a friend to take some more photos for his page.
His friend, a Marine, warned him that he may be going down a slippery slope.
“It’s just a few Link’s worth,“ said Linklet, “I have plenty that are growing in price that will make up for it.”
Only a few more people followed or liked his photos. He tried messaging the models he followed, but they ignored him.
“Maybe I’m not handsome enough,” Thought Linklet. Linklet went off to workout and posted healthy foods on his page. He LOST followers!
“It’s these clothes! They’re not nice enough,” Linklet went off to the highest end stores for a new closet.
“I’m sorry sir, we cannot sell these to you,” said the tailor at a store in Lamboland. “It would be irresponsible.”
“But I need to look great!” said Linklet. He felt insecure about having less Link than others, and remembered the time before the singularity when he was poor.
A few Marines took him out the store, and lectured him about financial responsibility. Linklet scoffed and went away.
“They’re not rich anyways.”
Linklet went to the Nigger Rich tree.

[Anonymous No.8996830]

>>8995182
The lady appeared again.
“They’re not as glamorous as you and me,” said Social Media.
“They’re not?”
“Look at them, living modestly. They need to live it up!” said Social Media. “Come, eat this fruit and return to earth, there you will be able to buy anything you want.”
She’s right! Look at these pathetic Marines. They don’t know anything about money. Afterall, Linklet had the foresight to buy LINK! Linklet grabbed the fruit and chomped it down. Its juices splashed on his face like splooge.
“Yes! Yes!” The temptress’ voice contorted demonically. “You are mine now.” Her arms changed into large black claws that encased Linklet.
Higher ranking Marines ran towards the commotion. “What have you done?” They cried.
“I didn’t know! I didn’t know!” Linklet cried out. He watched as the blackness corrupt him. The last thing he remembered was something being shoved in his asshole.

[Anonymous No.8996842]

>>8995182
Earth, 2 years later.
Linklet was a shell of a man. He had been used up by everyone he knew. His profile stagnated having no more to fund it. Even at his ATH he could only meet C list celebrities. All that were available to him now were single mothers.
Linklet was forced to return to wagecucking. He toiled again by the sweat of his brow. Every night he dreamed about lamboland. His girlfriend would go out every night for “girls’ night out ;)” and his children look nothing like him. What meager wages he had were split to support his family and women who had accused him of assault back when he was nigger rich.
One day, as he went to trade in his lambo for a used Nissan, he met another guy trading in his lambo as well, but for one of another color.
“Nice lambo you got there,” said Linklet.
“Took me a while to save up for it,” said the man, “it would’ve been easier if I bought LINK.”
“Yeah, haha, I wish I had bought LINK too,” said Linklet.

[Anonymous No.8996866]

>>8996842
gaddam. I was on the edge of my seat.

[Anonymous No.8996943]

>>8995227
Damn the feels

[Anonymous No.8996993]

>>8996666
checked!

[Anonymous No.8996994]

When has a good (or any) announcement not lead to a good dumping? Literally when?

[Anonymous No.8997022]

>>8996994
You know what to do
>buy rumour sell news

[Anonymous No.8997115]

>>8996767
>>8996781
>>8996799
>>8996811
>>8996821
>>8996830
>>8996842
as a 15k linklet myself i realy liked this anecdote

[Anonymous No.8997306]

>>8995227
Did anyone save the bed time story from three days ago?

[Anonymous No.8997413]

>>8996842
Damn, this ending rang so true. I friend of mine had bought many many antshares when they were in the cents. Don't ask me why or how but believe it or not, he lost his private key but only discovered it when the price was way above 100$. I still remember him calling me in tears and raging because he lost more than a million at the time. I never talked about crypto with him after that, afraid of what he might do.
One day, we were with some other guy and he starts talking about crypto and NEO saying his friend bought it when it was antshares and he made a killing and bought a house. All my friend did was say this with the most complex emotion I ever saw on anyone's face "yeah, wish I also had invested in antshares! ahah".

[Anonymous No.8997474]

>>8997306
The one where linklet is looking for the link whale.

[Anonymous No.8997493]

>>8997474
>>/biz/thread/S8958501

[Anonymous No.8997496]

>>8997413
that really hurt to read. I will make sure my LINKies are safe

[Anonymous No.8997523]

Is this fucking keynote a meme or what? Give me a source for it, please.

[Anonymous No.8997531]

>>8997493

[Anonymous No.8997579]

>>8997496
I know. These stories are a cautionary tale to everyone. The link bedtime stories are amazing. They always make me smile and make me remember to never fail to temptation. Keep them secret, never sell everything you have and be patient. Great things will come to us.

[Anonymous No.8997580]

>>8997531
I will legit commission a LINK nightlight and get covers like those and sleep comfy every fucking night for the rest of my life if it moons.

[Anonymous No.8997743]

>>8997493
Thanks fren. I was getting fomo..

[Anonymous No.8997822]

>>8995227
fuck that was nice

[Anonymous No.8997847]

super stinky 1k eoy

[Anonymous No.8997875]

I don't trust you assholes at all.

I was going to tether up 100% of my other two coins and leave like 10k linkies. But indecided to untether and put it all into link

[Anonymous No.8998188]

>>8996842
for this a story i shall tell my grandchildern when they are being naughty, long live the mythos of LINK

[Anonymous No.8998316]

Aaaaaaaaaand
IT IS DUMPING !
WAKE THE FUCK UP OP !!
IT IS DUMPING !!

[Anonymous No.8998325]

>>8997523
Definitely a meme then. Thought so.

[Anonymous No.8998490]

>>8995227
beutiful