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2023-11: Warosu is now out of extended maintenance.

/biz/ - Business & Finance

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8716537 No.8716537 [Reply] [Original]

FREEZE!

YOU HAVE 10 SECONDS TO HAND ME OVER YOUR TRADES HISTORY ALONG WITH YOUR COST BASIS ANALYSIS OR I WILL SHOOT YOU!

What do?

>> No.8716550

>>8716537
here are my penis

>> No.8716585

>>8716537
Here, take these 3000 pages of trades that my bot made.

>> No.8716594

>>8716585
rip all ur gains sir

>> No.8716598

Lost them in a boating accident

>> No.8716619

Give you the best effort I made in calculating my 2017 gains using cointracking.info plus my income from forked coins and losses from shitcoin scams

>> No.8716629

>>8716537
if an irs agent shows up at my house I will unironically shoot them dead

>> No.8716653

>>8716585

mm you like micro transactions sir do you?

That's a shame that every one of them is a taxable event... I just calculated that you owe us 10 times what you have in crypto. Better start selling what's left...

>> No.8716663

>>8716537

Fire back, because the IRS would never do that.

>> No.8716666

>>8716629
Choked laughing at this because you'd be doing god's work. That shouldn't even be a crime.

>> No.8716695

>>8716585
i actually think it's awesome that there are people in this position. Not because they have to pay taxes, but fuck the IRS. They deserve a shit ton of paperwork.

>> No.8716703

>>8716653
I can always say my bot lost more money than it made and ask for a return.

>> No.8716775

>>8716537
Sorry sir, I bought some XMR a while back and lost them all :(

>> No.8716843
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8716843

>>8716695
If the IRS gets an insane amount of work they'll just raise taxes and hire more people.

The government never loses.

>> No.8716847

i'm doing exactly this right now and sending it to a cpa shortly afterwards. fucking sucks

>> No.8717015

>>8716537
Sir please leave my property, this isn't the United States. Are you lost?

>> No.8717036

>>8717015

Pajeet Tax Service will come too