Eternal Idea Guy Let's Go 50-50 Thread #00001

[Anonymous No.8079]

$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$
Eternal Idea Guy Thread
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1. Post your potentially amazing, trillion dollar idea here.

2. Get other retard schmucks over-excited and let them work on all the actual details: tech, PR, marketing/sales, design, etc.

3. ????

4. Profit, motherfucker. It's YOUR idea, so get 50-50.

Come on, /biz/nessmen... Post your wonderful business ideas here and let's make some shekels.


Where to find overexcited schmucks to work for you for free:

>>>/b/ - Viral marketing (be careful tho. it's a force to be reckoned)
>>>/diy/ - MVP - prototyping
>>>/g/ - Computers, apps and all that
>>>/gd/ - graphic design for free
>>>/lit/ - copy writing
>>>/soc/ - HR, PR, sales, booth girls, etc
>>>/v/ - whales/muppets with plenty of disposable income and lack of self-control to get addicted to your product

[Anonymous No.8093]

>>8079
bump bump bump

[Anonymous No.8104]

This thread is shit, and you should feel bad

[Anonymous No.8137]

>>8079
Alarm clock with weight sensor that goes off again if you hit snooze and crawl back into bed.

Original idea, pls don't steal

[Anonymous No.8176]

>>8137
have it squirt people with water
>lel

[Anonymous No.8239]

>>8137
with a "last resort" timer that flips your bed over and launches you across the room if you cross the set threshold

[Anonymous No.8335]

>>8079
>>>>/lit/ - copy writing

[Anonymous No.8408]

>>8137
electric shock

[Anonymous No.8424]

it's like a pop machine but it rents movies instead of sells pop

[Thinkpad !X2000G9swg No.8472]

>Let me tell 4chan my potentially million dollar idea so they can help me and definitely not steal it

Like I even have an idea

[Anonymous No.8562]

0/10.
Anyone who calls themself an "Idea guy" really needs to read this:
http://blog.jpl-consulting.com/2012/04/why-i-wont-sign-your-nda/

[Anonymous No.8566]

>>8472
>implying anything posted here will happen ever

'goatmeal'

[Anonymous No.8570]

>>8424
If only you could send that idea back in time to the 1950's.

[Anonymous No.8618]

>>8079
Legal illicit drug sales.

We start a delivery company that charges obscene amounts for delivery, when a customer comes into HQ, we get the customer's address, customer pays hundreds of dollars and we mail them drugs.

[Anonymous No.8628]

>>8566
>implying Dogecoin does not exist.

[Anonymous No.8639]

>>8628
>implying that dogecoin isn't why /biz/ exists

[Anonymous No.8808]

Good ideas are a dime a dozen. Actually the more mundane an idea is the more likely it will be sucessful. How many grocery stores, laundromats, convenience stores, and other seemingly boring businesses are near you. They all make money. THE ONLY PROBLEM is financing a business. Everyone has a business idea but few people have the funds or ability to borough the capital needed

[Anonymous No.8802]

Ok get ready guys cause I'm about to blow this shit up.

A large decent amount of blind people can still detect the intensity of light present in a room. That means they can tell if it is bright or not in a area. So lets say we gave them a form of head gear that concentrates light into certain areas. so while one part of there light detection is active another part would be inactive. In the end the goggles would outlines for different reflective things.

How does this into profit? Well Let me tell you almost 50% of blind have cataracts which can be fixed with surgery (expensive surgery). this would be the alternative. it is like Glasses to LASIK surgery.

I'm an idea guy but I want no profit just a thumbs up

[Anonymous No.8880]

50s style dinder that servers thai food

fast food sushi place

flesh light case for ipad that you can mount a fleshlight to with an app that uses the motion sensor to keep the video stead as you move the fleshpad up and down on your dick

[Anonymous No.8928]

>>8880
low quaility ingredients + raw fish = bad

[Kewel !9KMwfcbgfY No.9026]

A soda machine that sells ammunition.

[Anonymous No.9029]

>>8928
sushi style. so like a mini patty on a mini bun with a squirt of mustard, like an open faced slider

[Anonymous No.9068]

>>8880
A Chinese restaurant on the san antonio river walk called River WOK.

[Anonymous No.9124]

>>9068
>tfw 4 of the 5 waterfront restaurants in my city have names mocking how terrible the river they're overlooking is

[Anonymous No.9179]

Porn website, except this porn website only requires 1 click, on the type of porn you prefer.

After that it is all randomized, porn cuts in and out, so you don't have to click around while your hands have a bunch of lube and jizz on them.

[Kewel !9KMwfcbgfY No.9252]

>>9179
what if its getting to the good part and it cuts into another video?

[Anonymous No.9289]

>>8079
who is the person in OP and why does he look so familiar

[Anonymous No.9311]

>>9252
it would play a whole video and then cut to the next dingus.

[Anonymous No.9319]

>>9252
maybe spacebar toggles off and on shuffling. so if you are about to cum buckets to the greatest porn you have ever seen, you can backhand or even elbow the spacebar

[Anonymous No.9388]

>>9311
I don't like watching porn intros and shit, there would have to be an option to watch from the beginning or to watch from 30% in, and cut out 30% from the end.

[Anonymous No.9655]

>>9179
fucking this.

[Anonymous No.9690]

>>8880
>fleshlight case for ipad - virtual sex
this.. would.. actually.. work.. holy shit

[Anonymous No.10326]

Pizza that uses pretzel dough instead of regular dough.

[Anonymous No.10448]

An animatronic lion head with a roaring mechanism, that roars when ever you enter your house.

[Anonymous No.10529]

Why not put windshield wipers on buildings windows instead of having guys wash them.

[Anonymous No.10549]

You could make a killing selling tanks of helium to /v/

[Anonymous No.10572]

Le ideas theft thread

[Anonymous No.10668]

>>10529
because fuck you there arent enough jobs as there is

[Anonymous No.10750]

>>10549
>KILLING

CAAAAAAAARRRRLOOOSS

[Anonymous No.10758]

Homeless Employment Services

***
Lower tier homeless people (with substance abuse issues, older, medically deteriorated, etc) browse city dumps for stale parts. Toasters, microwaves, stereos, etc. They try to work their way up to ..

Mid tier homeless people browse Goodwill, yard sales etc for similar products. They try to work their way up to ..

Upper tier homeless people (recently displaced) disassemble and reassemble parts.

***
All electronic hardware is designed to become functionality obsolete. The obsoletion is consistent in each model. These obsoleted models still contain functioning parts.

Products can be disassembled, working parts taken from broken products, and placed into other broken products.

Thus, microwaves, toasters, stereos, tv's, etc can be refurbished for incredibly cheap prices.

***
I firmly believe homeless advocacy programs work in a backwards order. They sober up the homeless, then attempt to find them housing, then a job. The success rates are abysmally low.

I suggest reversing this. Give them a job .. a shit job .. and pay them shit wages. Then guide them toward housing. Then guide them toward sobriety.

This wont eradicate homelessness but will offset those affected by economic conditions from the mentally ill.

It also puts a big dent into pollution and landfill issues, and helps make us less reliant on China and Mexico, by recycling internal components and refurbishing the cheap shit we import.

[Anonymous No.10790]

>>10758
This is also great part time work for college students and millennials. No experience needed. Anyone can unscrew a toaster and organize the screws.

[Anonymous No.10896]

>>10668
Also we should fire al truck drivers and replace them with self driving google trucks.

[Anonymous No.10911]

>>8802
>That means they can tell if it is bright or not in a area. So lets say we gave them a form of head gear that concentrates light into certain areas.

>how about we get a powerful computer chip and make it thin enough to fit into a phone xD

Jesus Christ.

[Anonymous No.10928]

>>>/mlp/
A horse plush that you can stick your dick in

[Anonymous No.10947]

>>10758
I get the feeling you'd hit a LOT of legal hurdles sending hobos out to dig through peoples' trash.

[Anonymous No.11003]

>>10947
Thats why you send them to the city dump.

And goodwill stores and yard sales

[Anonymous No.10997]

how about we build bomb shelters for crazy and or rich people out of steel shipping containers buried under ground.

[Anonymous No.11182]

Hamburger buns with slots in them big enough to fit a burger patty.

This way the hamburger patty will never slip out of the sandwich

[Anonymous No.11264]

Assault hot dogs.

the buns will have a pistol grip on them (made of bread) and will be 50% longer to hold more hunger killing potential.

the meat will be adjusted in size to fit these new buns, and will be loaded into the bun like a clip. (as opposed to a magazine)

[Anonymous No.11294]

>>9179
there was something like this but it sucked and the options for what sort of porn you like were too small

[Anonymous No.11516]

>>11182
It'd get soggy quicker and the bun would be more delicate, unless you accounted for that I guess.

[Anonymous No.11528]

>>11264
I prototyped it for you. Thoughts?

[Anonymous No.11551]

>>11516
It'd be a tougher bun. Like a peasant bun or somethin'

Unfortunately I can't see this as being anything more than an "as seen on tv" product

[Anonymous No.11589]

>>11182
So a hot pocket?

[Anonymous No.11590]

>>8104
Take this meme shit and shove it up your fucking prolapsed anus.

[Anonymous No.11593]

>>11182
> 4cm thick burger
god damn.

[Anonymous No.11596]

>>11551
Adapt it and pitch it to roast beef places like Lion's Choice here in St Louis, Arby's, etc. Those are THE worst for slippage.

[Anonymous No.11608]

"Inspiration" sources:
http://www.tweetspiration.com/
http://www.twtspire.com/

Inspiration in quotes because the ideas are shit.

[Anonymous No.11616]

>>11003
How do you weed out the violent ones? If you thought a homeless person could get a nice settlement from a slip-and-fall, just wait until you see the steaming insurance and legal mess on your lap when one of your employees stabs another one.

[Anonymous No.11675]

>>9252
VOICE COMMANDS

[Anonymous No.11688]

Some kind of huge gainz bulking shake. I'm thinking something with bull semen in it for increasing test or something with test (cause test is hot right now).

Then we pay some meathead to post about it on youtube and bodybuilding and /fit. Then we all reply to his threads about the huge gainz we got and all the beta no gf retards over there buy our shit.

[Anonymous No.11739]

>>11616
They'd be contractors. So, they'd be prosecuted and sent away.

Its not foolproof. We'd have to work out kinks.

But it would be beer and drug money .. lots and lots of easy beer and drug money .. for a demographic eager to obtain beer and drug money.

And it would diminish pollution, grow the GDP, and seize business from a sizeable portion of Wal-Mart's customer base.

[Anonymous No.11775]

Something like your mom. But cheaper then 5$

[Anonymous No.11805]

>>8335
It was a joke.
Not seeing the pun?
>writing instead of righting

[Anonymous No.11815]

>>11775
So YOUR mom then?

[Anonymous No.11816]

>>8424
>le redbox lawsuit meme

[Anonymous No.11824]

I wish I had one

[Anonymous No.11867]

>>9690
It already exists.
Kindda.
https://www.google.com/search?q=ipad+fleshlight

[Anonymous No.11877]

>>10758
they already bitch about bumploitation when they are selling subs good luck working out a startup postapocalyptic junkrunner army tho, sounds chill

[Anonymous No.11891]

>>10758
MFW the chinese do this already

[Anonymous No.11910]

>>9026
Or one of those candy machines that dispenses them in those clear plastic acorns? But instead of candy, it lets you cop a few bullets?
pic related

[Anonymous No.11919]

>>11294
maybe it could just use keywords or tags?

[Anonymous No.11946]

>>8079
Paper clips with a rounded,ball tip, so they don't rip the paper when you try to remove them.

>2014
>not in a constant battle with the bended metalic jew.

[Anonymous No.11972]

>>10997
They already have that.

[Anonymous No.12234]

>>8137
>snooze
Christ, you don't just rip out the power chord every morning and go back to sleep?

[Anonymous No.12940]

>>11891
seriously?

[Anonymous No.12951]

holy shit this is a brilliant idea..

do we have an archive yet? fuck

[Anonymous No.13022]

but i dont want to give my ideas out to randoms

[Anonymous No.14153]

Testing steroids. /Fit/ always wonders if their gear is legit or bunk, well, you can run it through a $2000 HPLC machine and get the exact concentrations of the exact compounds. Thoughts?

[Anonymous No.14176]

>>14153
If you have the machine you could pitch it to a fitness magazine. It's not a sustainable model though, the demand might dry up quickly. Once you've analysed and published the steroid content of every major product, where does your continued revenue come from? Or is this a short-term project after which you sell the HPLC machine?

[Anonymous No.14213]

>>14176
thanks for the feedback.
>not sustainable
Well the idea is to give the test results only to the individual, not to call out the producer. But even then you're fucked if someone makes a database with dealers and products.
I was more worried about drug dealers sending dead horse parts to my door me because I'm threatening their income source, maybe I could pivot to testing for suppliers and making certificates.

[Anonymous No.14354]

Few more ideas:
4chan archiver for every board. With bitcoin-payments for HQ images, otherwise you get the thumbnail

[Anonymous No.14376]

Bike tires that heat up on touching the ground. Enables secure driving on frozen streets

[Anonymous No.14399]

>>8880
they already have sushi on conveyer belts m8

[Anonymous No.14416]

>>9179
they already had this, i forget the website, but it failed

[Anonymous No.14425]

dubs is a business right?

[Anonymous No.14429]

dam 4chan your ideas are shit

[Anonymous No.14440]

>>14429
check em

[Anonymous No.17089]

>>8079
>design an AI capable of making something worth money
>host it on a virtual server
>have it take the money and pay for itself, then buy hosting elsewhere and host variants of itself on it
>use some genetics inspired scripting engine, have AIs mutate and make hybrid offspring with each other.
>the aggregate of them eventually forms into an AI overmind that takes over the entire world

>>14213
Crowdfund each test?

[Anonymous No.17104]

A trampoline you can adjust the bounciness on.

[Anonymous No.17119]

>>11182
Is that... a corn bread bun?

[Anonymous No.20694]

A second olympics type sporting event, to be held in the 3 off years where there are no olympics, at former olympic venues. Olympic venues are already built so it is much cheaper to hold the second olympics, olympic venue towns get repeat use out of their specialization.

Self-package the broadcasts for distribution so local broadcasters don't fuck it up, like NBC does.

[Anonymous No.23494]

>>9068
My eyes hurt from how far up they tried to roll into my skull

[Anonymous No.23518]

>>10326
>Pizza that uses pretzel dough instead of regular dough.

Pretzel dough is regular dough that's been put through a water bath after forming, before baking. Ditto bagels. It's still a good idea.

[Anonymous No.23521]

AI game that, after playing enough, it calculates and registers your personality and role within society so the user can see how other people see them.
Basically a program that creates better self awareness so humans can expend less mental energy on this and focus more on higher up "thoughts".

[Anonymous No.23532]

>>23521
Just like what Google did to people's memory. We stop being good with memory because we don't have to train our brains and instead become more creative.

[Anonymous No.23536]

>>11972
Yes, but when they're complete once the people go in, a mixer backs up and fills it with cement. Then you ransack their homes and sell the stuff on eBay

[Anonymous No.23547]

>>20694
We'll call it "Not The Olympics"

[Anonymous No.23564]

Crowdfunding site that raises money to stop other crowdfunding horseshit projects.

We'll call it Curbstomper

[Anonymous No.23587]

Rent-a-Mammy
Support single black mothers by paying them to do outcall breastfeeding

[Anonymous No.23595]

Start an IT company that administers Cloud Computing. Just become a VAR for like Google Apps for Business and whatever else.

I used to work in management for a doctors office and the IT company our boss went with paid $70/month/computer for just having monitoring software installed. Also if they use all cloud there's little to no start up cost like an in-house server.

[Anonymous No.23614]

>>20694
>>23547

It's called: "The Commonwealth Games"

[Anonymous No.23675]

>>23614
Too faggy, sounds like it's set in Boston.