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/biz/ - Business & Finance

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806883 No.806883 [Reply] [Original]

I owe my friend $500 which I need to pay back in a week's time. I currently have $50. How do I get the other $450 to pay him back using the $50 which I currently have?

Thanks.

>> No.806888

>>806883
Suck 450 dicks, charge $1 each duck.

>> No.806895

Why are you in debt in the first place?

>> No.806900

>>806888
I have no intention of sucking some penises.

Couldn't I just invest into penny stocks?? If so what stocks would you recommend?

>>806895
Because I borrowed money that I thought I could pay back which I now realize I can't in the time required.

>> No.806903

>>806900
>Couldn't I just invest into penny stocks??
Great way to turn your $50 into 0, or -$500.

>> No.806912

>>806888
How do I squire the ducks?

>> No.806921

>>806903
> -500
I'm not an expert in penny stocks, but I'm pretty sure if the stock sucks they won't go into negative prices per share

>> No.806927

>>806921
Your only real option is betting, find a horse which will give you 10 times your money and hope for the best

>> No.806939

Ask your mom to give you $450.

>> No.806947

>>806883


Go on freelancer, donate plasma, blood, and/or sperm, hop on craigslist and see if there's any gigs. Worst case you get a loan for this

>> No.806950

>>806947
Sperm donation sounds interesting.


One question though I have inferior genes and I can only masturbate to very very hardcore porn.. assuming these two variables how much will my sperm cost if they allow me to proceed with the donation? I can masturbate up to 3-4 times per day.

>> No.806960

>>806883
If you suck my dick 4500 times I'll give you 10 cents per bj

>> No.806962

>>806960

OP this seems like a good offer here

>> No.806966

>>806950
It's a joke answer

>> No.806975

buy packs of coca cola and sell each can for a dollar

or suck sum dik at 10 dollars a suk

>> No.808386
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808386

>>806883
Go happy merchant with any product.

>> No.808410

A. Suck dicks for money
B. Sell dicksucking derivatives and beat the market

>> No.808414

>>806883
Just tell your friend that you're holding a populist referendum and the current vote is no on paying him back.

>> No.808417

The obvious answer that no one has brought up is the fact that if he really is your friend, he should trust you to give you his money back and will give you a little more time if you need it. And if you couldn't get it to him within a weeks time he would just have to deal with that regardless. Get a mcjob?

>> No.808448

>>808414
I lole'd

>> No.808525

>>806883

Nope, they are all correct. Start learning how to suck penises for big ca$h.

>> No.808779

>>806883
Honestly if you could just turn $50 to $500 why would anyone ever do any work?

>> No.808816

gotta hit a big accumulator in betting

>> No.808854

>>806960
>>806962

I'm seconding this - 10cents a suck is a good deal, considering you sound like someone who already sucks dicks for free

>> No.808861

You could suck 45,000 dicks and charge .01 cents per dick sucked.

>> No.808884

Buy a 24 pack of water bottles and a small pully/cart thing people use to lug boxes around.

Go to somewhere very hot and sell your water for 1$ each

If you live near a beach or somewhere hot, you could make 500$ profit in time.

>> No.808887

>>808884
If you buy a 24 pack for 10$ and sell at 1$ per bottle, you need to sell....

cost: $0.42 per bottle
proift: $0.68 per bottle

just sell 736 bottles of water and you're good m8

>> No.808949

Do what Greece did and hold a referendum.

Or buy greek bonds.