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/biz/ - Business & Finance

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626635 No.626635 [Reply] [Original]

Post your best closing lines or pitch

>> No.626659

>>626635
"Buy the shit or don't, I don't give a fuck"

>> No.626690
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626690

Give me your money and I promise not to kill you.

>> No.626708

>>626635
I usually tell them I had a crush on them from first sight, i love their hair or I've havent felt the way they make me feel in a very long time

>> No.626955

>>626635

One of the lines I use a lot is, "there's no reason not to buy this"

but i back that up with facts and figures.

>> No.626956

>>626955
>there's no reason not to buy this
It costs money.

>> No.627058

Truthfully sir, I am going to cry in my very public sales cubicle in front of all my bosses and co-workers. But sir not tears of regret, tears for the long term survivability of your business given that they rely on short sighted clowns like yourself to make purchasing decisions. Whats your name? Micheal? ok Micheal make sure your desk is clean because when I go over your head to your boss he is going to be pissed that you would let this slip away..

>> No.627065

>>626708
Tits or gtfo?

>> No.627108

>>626956

not if it saves you money. 95% of my clients save money in their business by buying my product.

They are literally losing money by not buying my product.

So, that's why I say it.

>> No.627112

>Pitch
Selling is not pitching.

>> No.627144

"It was like that when I got here"

>> No.627150

I'm in car sales, so all pitches are pretty standard.
"Alright Mr. Jones, I can see that you're drooling with excitement over this new Genesis that you just drove. Now, if I can get the payments to work in your favor, in any way, shape or form.... can I earn your business today?"

>> No.627155

>>627058
OP here. This is awesome

>> No.627156

>>627150

if you said that to me i'd straight up headbutt you

>> No.627162

90% of these cars underperform the market.

>> No.627180

You want to shop around? Hmm so if u "shoped" around and saw this 3k product for fifty buck, would you buy it? OK so it's a price thing, it's a little more than u wanted to spend no? OK, let me get on the phone with my supervisor and see if he can give u the deal of a lifetime.
>chessy phone t.o. closes customer

>> No.627192

>>627150
No, I still need to shop around, this is my first stop, can I have your card?

>> No.627194
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627194

>>627065
>>627108

>> No.627200

Listen I certainly don't want to waste your time any longer and to be honest, I hope you're not wasting mine. By the end of the day I'm going to be out of *insert product here* whether you buy one or not, so what are your thoughts?

>> No.627202

>>627>>627192
Sir, I appreciate the fact that you want to gather all of the information possible before you act. I've never seen anybody make the wrong decision with the right information.
But, before you go, I just have to ask. The entire time, you've been ranting and raving about this vehicle, and the research you've done in regards to it. You test drove the car, said you live the feel, color, and the options. All of these things are what you picked out. You obviously love this car. So, what's stopping you from leaving with it today?

>> No.627203

>>627150

> asking for permission

a great salesman never has to ask. It's really hard to do, but it can be done, and is done by the best.

A great salesman treats his product like it is solid gold and the customer would be a fucking fool not to buy it.

>> No.627212

>>627200
Nice way to boost up the sense of urgency without sounding desperate. It's like u don't even need thier business, and your doing THEM a favor

>> No.627214

>>627202
Um um um to be honest it's a little more than I wanted to spend.

>> No.627216

>>627203
Yeah this works on some customers, they need to be told to buy, but some people just need to feel important and better than u, which is why they buy if they're asked rather than told.

>> No.627221

>>627203
Still, very good point sir

>> No.627234

>>627216

yeah, it's a fine line.

>> No.627251

>>627214
Well sir, it's not about where you start, it's about where you finish! You love this car, you obviously want to take it home. Let's see what we can do in order to make this dream come true.

>> No.627252

>>626708
I would put the moves on you really hard and make you feel extremely uncomfortable.

>> No.627256

>>627251
>closes me
Good job Anon. U came of as a consultant trying to help me find the best solution. Not to pushy, not to desperate.

>> No.627258

>>627256
Thank you.

>> No.627265

>>627258
Out of curiosity, if you had to price drop, what would u say to make it credible.

>> No.627273

>>627265
Good news! I was able to find a little bit more wiggle room. Hyundai actually just released a new incentive this week, with it being the end of the month, in the form of Dealercash only available for this model of Genesis.

>> No.627324

I use this speech all the time in legal settlements, but it works for cash negotiations as well:

"In a good settlement, both sides leave a bit unhappy, but glad it wasn't worse. I'm a bit unhappy with this deal. If you're a bit unhappy too, then its probably time to shake hands and make this happen."

90% of the time it works on half the people.

>> No.627330

>>627200
That's the moment where I kick most of the guys out who come to my office.

This is a shitty line.

>> No.627331

>>627150

Based car sales. "If I can get the numbers to work out in your favor can we make a deal today?"

>> No.627334

>>627324
>90% of the time ot works on half the people.

So, it works 45% of the time?

>> No.627335

>>626635
"and that, sir, is why you should give me your credit card details if you ever want to see your family again"

>> No.627337

>>627331
>So you already have a better option and tried to fish me with a higher price. I can't trust you.

>> No.627349

>>627337
Well, sir I understand how you feel but Dodge is really proud of the dart so we are offering incentives and rebates to put more on the road. I can really get aggressive with the pricing on this vehicle to the point where I can make this number start with a 1.

>> No.627364

>>627349
Sure kid, you couldn't do this from the beginning and tried to fool me. I bet you're trying to fool me again. I can't trust you kid.

>> No.627369

>>627334
Alternatively, half the time it only works on 5% of the people.

>> No.627373

>>627330
That's good to hear probably, since I've literally never sold anything in my life.

>> No.627381

>>627364

You got me, ultimately the name of the game is to make money. The dealership has to make a little profit for the inventory that we move. I sell a lot of Darts, and work with a lot of different income levels. I do have a little wiggle room and I'm promise that I'll put my best foot forward in getting you good deal. So have a seat for a moment and I'll work my magic in the sales tower. Also what would you like to drink while you wait?

>> No.627408
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627408

'so, whats the next step?'

I work as a logistics salesman, so usually I've done enough qualifying and trial closing that I just have to ask for the close.

>> No.627429

>>627065
>>627252


I am male

currently slept with 3 new chicks since NYE. All quality and educated ( my favorite out of all 3 has full ride to best engineering school in the region)

>> No.627466

>>627408

That's a good one. puts the ball in their court in a very action oriented way.

>> No.627470

>>627466
Yeah, the point of it is that I've basically already closed, and I am asking for business. Then I approach the rest of their objections.

'I need to talk to the ceo' lets get them in here then

'I need to think first' what did you need to think about, etc etc

>> No.628375

>>627331
Out of curiosity, suppose I were to tell you that I have a trade-in and am interested in a new car. I will be getting offers from several dealers in the area for the same trim level dart with the same features and accessories. I wont tell you the offers the other dealers make and I am only giving each dealer the chance to make one offer. The best combined deal for my trade and the new car gets my business. What do you do?

>> No.628459

>>628375
Id just burn it. Give u the lowest possible price i can get, make some volume and get some word of mouth advertising and referrals from u

>> No.628546

>>628375
Pretty much this >>628459


Not really worth losing your business over a couple grand when we sell 300 cars a month. I just wouldn't make as much. The next customer could come in and make me 2k so I would definitely be willing to cut a few deals.

>> No.629232

I have a question for the other car sales people here.
What does your commission structure look like?
Mines 13% total gross for the deal, front and back. If you hit 10 cars it goes up to 14% and 15% for 15+.

>> No.629246

>>629232
25% gross profit and 35% after 10 cars. Plus full list bonuses(getting the sticker price) and spins from Dodge, Chrysler, Jeep, Ram and Fiat.

>> No.629283

>>629246
25% front and back? Fuck I need to move back to a real metro area.

>> No.629286

>>627112
This. Why don't people get this?

>> No.629428

>>629283

All on the front end man. I wish man.

>> No.629452

>>629286

Uh.

The critical point in the sale is "the pitch" however you want to phrase it, it is the key aspect.

>> No.629736

>>627381
a blowjob

>> No.629738

"let me pick up the tab, you can get me next time"

>> No.630778

>>629452
This

>> No.630910

>>627251
>brings out the square of death
>loads up cart to 145LTV
>gets fucked on back end
>bank laughs for days

I work at a subprime auto finance company, all people with bad credit who buy used cars get fucked hardcore

>> No.630989

I'm doing really bad at my alumni calling job.
What are some things I can do to build rapport on the phone quickly. I ask about jobs and try to talk about the school and what they liked, what I can't miss out on etc.
then how do I navigate through "no's"? I usually just say "I understand that's a lot to ask for and its actually the leadership ammt" then on second ask something like "we aren't actually able to operate a university without alumni gifts it helps with ___(back to script)"
Then on fourth I go into desperate participation "right before you go I have to stress participation, I'd be remisct if I didn't"

It's an Ag/Tech school btw if that changes anything.

>> No.631280

>>627202
Your pentrative nature.

>> No.631841

>>627108
what kind of gay ass product do you sell?

>> No.631843

>>627369
so it works 40% of the time 100% of the time, right?

>> No.631857

"So, in closing.... AYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY LMAOOOOOOOOOO"

>> No.631862

>>627251
>Implying I am not practically a jew (a paki lololol) and will let you compete with other dealers

>> No.631908

>>630910

The only reason why they get fucked is because they didn't take the time to learn how finances work. It's not difficult to acquire decent credit.

>> No.631958

"I gave to wrap this up quickly my daughters first chemo session is this afternoon"

>> No.632171

>>629246
>>629283
so like if I buy a 10k car please explain how much

>> No.632199

>>627150
Sell me a mk 3 supra

>> No.632502

>>632171

If the invoice is 10k but I sell it for 14k I get 25% of the 4k difference. If you have a trade in, it's based off of how much profit we make on the trade(how much we give as opposed to how much it's worth) + how much we sell the car for. So if you have a trade that's worth 8k but you only want 3k AND the 10k car goes for 14k, we get 25% of the 9k.

>> No.632506

>>627429
Awesome story bro.

>> No.632601

>>631958
This

>> No.632617
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632617

>>631958

>> No.632643

"So are you going to buy it?"

>> No.632876

>>626635

I was once on a phone with a DBA during a production rollout of some code.

"Can we wrap this up later. I have to be in probate court at 2."

>> No.632884

>>631841

payroll service.

If your company has over 5 employees you SHOULD have it. There is no reason not to. And my brand is usually 30% - 50% lower than competitors. And if it isn't I'll just be straight up and tell the client.

So if we can save them money, I'll say something like, "there's really no reason not to use our service"

>> No.632887

>>626635
I'll give you some time to talk it over. When I come back, let me know if you want the money in your pocket or the memories with your children.

Frontline timeshare sales are brutal.

>> No.633091

>>629738
Does this shit really fool people?

I feel like I'm immune to most standard sales techniques, but I could just be fooling myself.

Besides if I walked onto a lot, I'm not there to shoot the shit, I'm there looking to buy.

>> No.633117

Why do people hate salesman? Buyers lie more than us! Half the time they're trying to take money out of our pockets.

>> No.633169

>>627058
I had a friend with a pretty much similar approach and closed sales when he knew the prospect wanted to buy but made fake excuses as to why.

>> No.633179

>>626635

Fuck her right in the pussy

>> No.633271

>>627324
>>627324
That's a good one. I usually use:

"This isn't a legal decision; it's a business decision. Is it better business to bleed to make a point or is it best that we put this behind us and get back to making money?"

>> No.633490

>>631958
10/10. Made me laugh.