/smg/ stock market general

[Anonymous No.54451230]

the good guys won edition

>Educational sites:
https://www.investopedia.com/
https://www.khanacademy.org/economics-finance-domain

>Charts:
https://www.tradingview.com
https://www.finscreener.com
https://www.koyfin.com/
https://www.portfoliovisualizer.com

>Live Streams:
https://www.newslive.com/american/cnbc.html
https://www.newslive.com/american/bloomberg-television-business.html

>Screeners:
https://finviz.com/
https://www.tradingview.com/screener
https://etfdb.com/

>Options
https://www.optionsplaybook.com/options-introduction/
https://www.optionsprofitcalculator.com
https://optionstrat.com/
https://www.optionistics.com/quotes/option-prices

>Pre-Market and Live data:
https://www.investing.com/indices/indices-futures
https://finance.yahoo.com/

>Calendars
https://www.marketwatch.com/economy-politics/calendar
https://www.earningswhispers.com/calendar
https://www.cmegroup.com/trading/interest-rates/countdown-to-fomc.html

>Boomer Investing 101:
https://www.bogleheads.org/wiki/Getting_started

>Misc
https://finance.yahoo.com/trending-tickers
https://market24hclock.com/
https://fintel.io/
https://www.dividendchannel.com/drip-returns-calculator
https://brokerchooser.com/

suoiverp ܂>>54449168

[Anonymous No.54451239]

for the last 3 months i was long boil and short nvda

[Anonymous No.54451244]

>>54451239
Should’ve told me sooner. Could’ve made a killing on the inverse

[Anonymous No.54451245]

It's literally over tomorrow, isn't it?

[Anonymous No.54451247]

Looks like twitter might start accepting dogecoin

[Anonymous No.54451252]

What have we done to deserve this bobros?

[Anonymous No.54451253]

IS DEXTER ILL
IS DEXTER ILL
IS DEXTER ILL TODAY?

[Anonymous No.54451255]

the coming financial collapse will destroy all of you

[Anonymous No.54451261]

>Bobo seethes at "unfair prices", allocates $1bn short
>Gets clobbered by $15bn in buybacks
>Gets knocked on his ass by $20bn worth of index fund inflows
>Gets spit on by $30bn of other bobos squeezed into closing shorts
>Gets pissed on by $50bn in mandatory CTA buying
>Gets shit on by $200bn in emergency Fuck Bobo "lending" from new Fed facility

Sorry, Bobo, money talks.

[Anonymous No.54451263]

>up 13%
Based BOIL puts printed today. Gains realized, will re-enter on the next pump and buy more puts

[Anonymous No.54451264]

>>54451252
Nothing, our mere existence makes them seethe.

[Anonymous No.54451265]

Heavy retail buying today. Net retail demand of $1.1bn is in the 94th%..

Is this a bullish or bearish chart?

[Anonymous No.54451266]

>>54451253
Mr Kirk, Dexter's in school.

[Anonymous No.54451268]

I CAN'T FUCKING BELIEVE NVDA PUMPS 1% WHEN I SHORT IT

[Anonymous No.54451276]

>>54451265
Bullish because "smart money" will be forced to chase, FOMOing in.

[Anonymous No.54451280]

>>54451265
Retail is dumb money, so heavily bearish

[Anonymous No.54451283]

>>54451266
That boy needs therapy

[Anonymous No.54451289]

>>54451280
I'm bullish because you are retail and I'm inversing you

[Anonymous No.54451294]

>>54451255
This, except unironically.

[Anonymous No.54451298]

>>54451265
The great heeming is nigh.

[Anonymous No.54451316]

>>54451255
>>54451294
>Gamma squeezes you're red day with pennies worth of 0dte calls

[Anonymous No.54451344]

should i buy VTI now

[Anonymous No.54451359]

I was thoroughly, and financially, heemed today.

[Anonymous No.54451361]

>>54451344
You should have hought it 5 years ago dumdum

[Anonymous No.54451377]

>>54451289
How many shares of BBBY do you have?

[Anonymous No.54451384]

Buy SQQQ

[Anonymous No.54451386]

>>54451252
Dunno, lad. The noses wanted to do this for some reason.

[Anonymous No.54451394]

>>54451359
You're going to adjust your risk-management procedures, right anon?

[Anonymous No.54451400]

>>54451384
Jeb!

[Anonymous No.54451407]

>yields

[Anonymous No.54451411]

>>54451384
JEB! MARKET

[Anonymous No.54451413]

+0.28

[Anonymous No.54451414]

Holy fuck has been happening to SENS

[Anonymous No.54451418]

>>54451361
sry i meant should i buy more VTI

[Anonymous No.54451438]

>>54451230
Sell options!
Sell them on indexes for maximum effect!

[Anonymous No.54451463]

>>54451414
Selling calls and puts on that piece of shit is the only way I've made any money off of it the last year and a half or so.

[Anonymous No.54451468]

>>54451261
No true bobo is in the market overnight in any way, including puts, and will not be until Mr. Market knocks on the door with desperate prices.

[Anonymous No.54451505]

i unintentionally established unspoken rizz between me and my mother in law. a while back, she was leaned over with her cleavage showing. she has to be DD at least. she saw me looking, she saw that I saw that she saw, and she saw that I kept looking despite seeing that she saw that I saw. the unspoken rizz has been persistent since then. are there any brazier companies marketed to seniors that I should be investing in?

[Anonymous No.54451519]

>>54451418
SVXY

[Anonymous No.54451529]

>>54451468
Yeah and they'll be waiting for the next forever. That bitchboy at the Fed couldn't stomach a single no-name bank going under; you really think he'd let another 2008 or 2020 happen? Or if he did that Washington wouldn't blackmail his resignation and swap in someone who *will* print overnight?

[Anonymous No.54451534]

>>54451253
>>54451266
>>54451283
Can't for the life of me remember where I heard this...but thanks for the memories.

[Anonymous No.54451564]

The fed has a dual mandate. to make stock prices go up, and to prevent them from going down

[Anonymous No.54451567]

>>54451505
Somewhat related, the actress who played Vasquez in Aliens started a bra company that caters to busty women when she retired from acting.

[Anonymous No.54451570]

>>54451529
Im quickly starting to realize they are just going to crash the ship with no survivors so long as they look like the good guys today. The boomers are seriously going to do it. It wasn't enought that they've fucked us over for over 40 years, with their dying breaths they will give us the middle finger on the way out

[Anonymous No.54451574]

>>54451534
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qLrnkK2YEcE

[Anonymous No.54451581]

A lot happened today. It may take all night to parse this data.

[Anonymous No.54451582]

>>54451438
These short calls are getting uncomfortable.

[Anonymous No.54451585]

>>54451570
>with their dying breaths they will give us the middle finger on the way out
BASED
>BASED
BASED

[Anonymous No.54451602]

>>54451570
>The year is 2028
>Nobody talks about dot com or 08 anymore, just '23

[Anonymous No.54451612]

>Yellen: US banking situation is stabilizing.

[Anonymous No.54451633]

SQQQ average is 40. What do I do in this situation

[Anonymous No.54451647]

>>54451574
I found it, I meant originally. Must have been in some amv from 10 years ago or some shit.

[Anonymous No.54451655]

>>54451633
Read your Jim Cramer.

[Anonymous No.54451656]

>>54451633
Invest in ROPE

[Anonymous No.54451661]

Bros I really need your advice here. Today I lost 746.3 from shorting and being a moron. I really wanna quit but the nagging feeling at the back of my mind is telling me that I should chase it and try to make it back. Do I quit here? Or do I try again? I really don't wanna do this again. I lost 10k once, it took me 8 months to make it back and it was a similar story.

[Anonymous No.54451671]

>>54451647
Oh yeah, that's possible. Think I heard it first on some YTMND.

[Anonymous No.54451679]

>>54451661
What did you short?

[Anonymous No.54451715]

>>54451582
This is why you make them covered calls or sell it as a spread
My recommendation if you're getting antsy is roll the short calls to a longer expiration and safer position and close out when you can collect a minor profit.

[Anonymous No.54451733]

>>54451661
whenever you see someone bearposting, the majority of them are this anon

[Anonymous No.54451739]

Where did all the bobos go?

[Anonymous No.54451743]

>>54451655
CRAAAAAAAAAAMMMMMMEEEEERRRRRRRR

[Anonymous No.54451746]

>>54451407
I miss Iwata

[Anonymous No.54451760]

>>54451655
How's the inverse Jim Cramer ETF doing?
You'd have to be a millionaire from $5,000 from when it was made, right?

[Anonymous No.54451762]

>>54451647
>>54451671
fuck, I had the album

[Anonymous No.54451769]

>>54451655
Holy fuck I never saw this, thank fuck I closed my shorts out today

[Anonymous No.54451779]

>>54451739
Still here.

[Anonymous No.54451783]

TOTAL DOLLAR DEATH.

Short USD. Sell holdings that deal with USD. Manipulate FOREX markets to devalue USD. Crash US markets and banks to decimate USD. Build trade channels between US competitors that don't use USD. Sell oil without USD. Purchase gold-backed currencies in exchange for USD. Long Chinese and Indian currency markets. Buy precious metals with USD. Burn USD. Shred USD. Print USD into hyperinflation. Defraud social security programs tied to USD.

[Anonymous No.54451784]

Do any anons have ideas on what resources there are to learn to interprate prospecting statements from mining companies, like mineral yields etc?
Do i just buy an intro textbook online or is there a good free investor's guide out there or online resources like a YouTube kahn academy for minerology type thing?

[Anonymous No.54451791]

ASMB stock ladies!

[Anonymous No.54451798]

>>54451760
It's relatively flat with very low volume. It was one of those memes that seemed amazing during it's creation, but once it was actually listed it's just kind of fizzled out. It was a funny joke but not something people actually want to put serious money into

[Anonymous No.54451806]

>>54451739
HEINEKIN? FUCK THAT SHIT. PABST. BLUE. RIBBON.

[Anonymous No.54451817]

>>54451760

[Anonymous No.54451816]

>>54451806
Make sure to buy the preferred. PBR-A.

[Anonymous No.54451819]

>>54451679
SPY when it was at 409.something

[Anonymous No.54451828]

>>54451739
Never understood the pickles

[Anonymous No.54451833]

>>54451733
Yeah being a bobo has always lead to me suffering. I dont know why I keep bobomaxxing though. I should honestly rope

[Anonymous No.54451844]

>>54451816
I'm not falling for that again. You guys got me with BBW and it really should have been CURV.

[Anonymous No.54451866]

>>54451828

[Anonymous No.54451874]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sEXHeTcxQy4
gave me gear
thank you dear
bring your sister over here

[Anonymous No.54451875]

>>54451783
>USD enters hyper inflation
>US pays off all their debt for literal pennies
Thanks for playing.

[Anonymous No.54451885]

>>54451739
I was forced to capitulate. I'm no perma bear, i just go whichever the way the wind is blowing. I'm /cashgang/ now but that's only because the chart is between signals and i would be trading blind if I enter in the middle like this. Bull strength is quite strong here though, retardedly so.

[Anonymous No.54451890]

>>54451386
Think about it, Schwab getting #metoo'ed about potential liquidity issues, millions of unsatisfied shabbos goys waking up to the managed professional advisor scam... What better time to fire my advisor and my broker at the same time... Meanwhile the backdrop is that QE is most certainly back on the menu with the bank bailout, anything they say is cope to the fact that the fed is absorbing a large debit on their balance sheet for the banks treasury bond losses. That is why line go up.
Also jannies tongue my anus for a ridiculous 3 day ban.

[Anonymous No.54451892]

>>54451255
Money printing is back, either the last rate hike was the last or the next will be (the pause) then as data flatlines and or turns down they will pivot to more QE and cuts. The bond market has been telling you this for a year. Stocks on average go up 8-10% in the twelve months after the pause and they go up hundreds of percent with more QE.

The market is a buy at any price cause in the future it is 100% absolutely guaranteed to be worth more at least nominally.

The high IQ professionals who went to the best schools specializing in the field and do this full time for a living for decades are all long. They are not wrong. Over the long term just buying the indexes beats everything else. Sure every now and again some fool will have blind luck and make a load on puts but that’s rare and simply luck.

Buy SPY; it’s absolutely 100% mathematically and legally guaranteed it will go higher.

[Anonymous No.54451896]

>>54451806
Don't forget to boycott any anheuser busch product indefinitely

https://nypost.com/2023/04/03/bud-light-partners-with-trans-activist-dylan-mulvaney-for-march-madness-this-isnt-a-parody/

[Anonymous No.54451908]

>>54451874
I am so sick of that song because the Blackhawks used it as their theme and it blasted from every sports bar every day for a whole year.

[Anonymous No.54451910]

>>54451896
>...this-isnt-a-parody/
I'm laughing. I shouldn't be laughing, but I'm laughing.

[Anonymous No.54451927]

>>54451633
>buying inverse ETFs in the short covering bottom phase of a new bull market

Are you literally retarded?

[Anonymous No.54451940]

>>54451908
here try this
>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TQWVg_FT1yM
here we go, yo
here's the scenario
gonna strip you down like a car in the barrio

[Anonymous No.54451944]

>>54451384
Jeb! loves niggas

[Anonymous No.54451948]

>>54451896
>No-no, seriously, this is not a joke

[Anonymous No.54451949]

Oil Chads, I think we might be back...

Might have to buy more... sucks i didn't really buy the dip last week.

[Anonymous No.54451958]

I came home to another day of bobos getting btfo'd. Will there ever be a happening ever again?

[Anonymous No.54451963]

Is that a fucking double top on NVDA or not? Wtf is wrong with people?
Why are they determined to pump this bubble? To what end?
Bubble go pop

[Anonymous No.54451970]

i work at XOM. will i be getting a big raise/bonus this year?

[Anonymous No.54451972]

>>54451948
Every day, this quote rings in my head.

[Anonymous No.54451975]

>>54451866
I love em' never understood the correlation with BBQ though

[Anonymous No.54451981]

1929 will happen again and it will finally end all this shoeshine boy nonsense.

[Anonymous No.54451984]

>>54451896
this isnt some april fools thing is it?

[Anonymous No.54451985]

>>54451981
>That headline
Same as it ever was.

[Anonymous No.54451990]

>>54451892
Based effenoldguy

[Anonymous No.54451997]

>>54451981
2 more weeks. Bobo in control. Trust burry.

[Anonymous No.54452003]

>>54451985
I didn't know The Onion existed in 1929

[Anonymous No.54452004]

>>54451985
bc price is just human psychology manifested into numbers.

[Anonymous No.54452007]

>>54451975
Pickles are good on bbq and with bbq, simple as.

[Anonymous No.54452008]

I want to all in on puts for BBBY. How much longer do they have before bankruptcy?

[Anonymous No.54452018]

I am financially and spiritually ruined

If I convert to Judaism will I see and end to these losses?

[Anonymous No.54452020]

>>54451981
I didn't know The Onion existed in 1929

[Anonymous No.54452033]

>>54451817
Thank you.

[Anonymous No.54452041]

>>54451972
>>54451984

[Anonymous No.54452042]

so what cope do we have left bobros

[Anonymous No.54452049]

>>54451784
>buy a textbook.
I can give you a $60 move for free right there.
You're already in the green!

[Anonymous No.54452061]

>>54451981
Your puts won't print when that happens bobo you will be in the bomb shelter/dead with the rest of us

[Anonymous No.54452071]

Daphne: Hi Elon, how are you doing today?

Elon: Hi Daphne, I'm doing well, thank you. How about yourself?

Daphne: I'm doing great, thank you for asking. I was just thinking about our upcoming meeting, and I wanted to make sure we were both on the same PAGE.

Elon: Absolutely, I think we're both very excited to discuss the new project.

Daphne: Yes, I think it has the potential to be a real game-changer. But before we get into the details, I wanted to ask you something. Are you familiar with the concept of TESHUVAH?

Elon: Yes, of course. It's the Jewish concept of repentance and returning to a state of righteousness.

Daphne: That's right. I've been thinking a lot about it lately, especially in terms of our work. I think it's important to be constantly reflecting on our actions and striving to do better.

Elon: I couldn't agree more. In fact, it reminds me of the idea of TIKKUN OLAM, repairing the world, which is also a fundamental concept in Judaism.

[Anonymous No.54452080]

>>54451230
HOLY FUCK CITADEL HQ BEING RAIDED BY FBI
MULTIPLE BLACKHAWKS IN THE AIRSPACE
THIS IS NOT A DRILL

[Anonymous No.54452087]

Anons, am I going crazy or is NVDA just in a massive bubble right now?
How long do these bubbles last?
Didn't the dotcom bubble end quicker than this?

[Anonymous No.54452091]

Daphne: Yes, that's a great point. And speaking of repairing the world, I wanted to make sure that our plans for this project are in line with the principles of TZEDAKAH, or charity and justice.

Elon: Absolutely. We want to make sure that our work is not only profitable, but also contributes positively to society.

Daphne: That's exactly right. And I think it's important that we approach this project with a sense of SHALOM, or peace and harmony.

Elon: I couldn't agree more. It's important to create an environment that is respectful and collaborative, where everyone can work together towards a common goal.

Daphne: Yes, I think that's so important. And I also think it's important that we approach this project with a sense of EMUNAH, or faith and trust in ourselves and in each other.

Elon: Absolutely. Without faith and trust, we wouldn't be able to accomplish anything.

Daphne: That's so true. And speaking of accomplishment, I think this project has the potential to be a real KIDDUSH HASHEM, or sanctification of God's name, by showing that business can be done ethically and with integrity.

Elon: Yes, I think that's a great way to approach it. We have the opportunity to make a real difference in the world, and to show that Jewish values can be a guiding force in business.

Daphne: I completely agree. I think we have a real opportunity here to create something special, and to be a light unto the nations.

Elon: That's a beautiful way to put it. I'm really looking forward to working with you on this project, Daphne. I think it's going to be great.

[Anonymous No.54452110]

long $BUD

[Anonymous No.54452111]

>>54451230
WWE was bought for $9billion. The WWEs market cap is $6.65billion. Anons do you smell what my calls are cookin??

[Anonymous No.54452117]

oh look vix near several year lows
time to buy guys, new paradigm!

[Anonymous No.54452132]

i just used cGPT-3 to write a script to automate a bunch of optimization simulations. my only coding experience is from 1 class 8 years ago and a handful of arduino/pi projects. this would've taken me at least 2 weeks to figure out on my own, even with googling and asking around

this blackpilled me

this is why line is going up

companies will end up with 1 employee doing the work of 20. their margins just mooned.

Bobo, I....

[Anonymous No.54452149]

>>54452132
larp
t. c SWE

[Anonymous No.54452176]

>>54452132
GPT3 says it doesnt have access to live financial data. It's lying

[Anonymous No.54452183]

>>54451970
Biden might have a dementia rage senior moment and dump a few million SPR barrels in addition to the 27 million currently scheduled for the next couple months.

Other than that you should be golden. OPEC will cut to defend prices in the event of any slowdown.

[Anonymous No.54452184]

>>54451671
I either first heard it on a friend's iPod at a high school football game circa 2006 or on YTMND.

[Anonymous No.54452193]

Let me guess, Tesla's going to be green tomorrow.
Wow didn't expect that.

[Anonymous No.54452203]

>>54451985
https://www.theonion.com/october-22-1929-1819587430

[Anonymous No.54452205]

>>54452110

Short BUD

[Anonymous No.54452223]

>>54451981
I hope people were lynched in Autumn 1929.

[Anonymous No.54452227]

>>54452018
>-550
>-0.02
Breh

[Anonymous No.54452250]

>>54451892
>Buy SPY; it’s absolutely 100% mathematically and legally guaranteed it will go higher.
Do I need to pay a boomer 1% of my portfolio value to keep me "diversified" in his selection of blackrock etfs? And then he's a total prick about selling covered calls and other things. I need my access to my capital bros. I go down when America (SPY) goes down. What's the catch? What does Klaus and the gang have cooking behind the scenes that I'm unaware?

[Anonymous No.54452267]

>>54452110
is there like a pool where you can wager days until anhero for people like this?

[Anonymous No.54452275]

>>54452203
Why did some people from the 20's and 30's just look like Herman Munster?

[Anonymous No.54452278]

>>54452149
It's true actually. I say this as an ex-SWE who now just uses GPT.

[Anonymous No.54452309]

>>54452042
They can enjoy their hyperinflation. They can call it a "right wing talking point" now for all I care. The poor will continue to suffer, and the rich bailed out.

[Anonymous No.54452313]

>>54452111
Based Steve
Bought leaps last month and more calls today, we're gonna be rich brother

[Anonymous No.54452331]

>They can enjoy their hyperinflation

[Anonymous No.54452364]

>>54452309
Remember not to buy meme guns. An M1 Garand is more than plenty. It's a great investment for you and your family.

[Anonymous No.54452369]

>>54452042
>credit card default rates up to 14-year high
>mortgage default rates up to 10-year high
>yield curve still inverted as fuck
>bank liquidity injection effect already almost gone, several banks failed anyway
>inflation still 3x higher than it should be
>unemployment still low
>eggs still 7 dollars
>proxy wars still going retardedly
>now several countries abandoning the USD

if we don't see a market crash before the end of the year I will stream myself pissing in my own face

[Anonymous No.54452410]

>Dumping afterhours
Y-yeah. L-let's go mumus...

[Anonymous No.54452411]

>>54452369
Um ever hear the phrase "priced in"?

[Anonymous No.54452421]

>>54452369

[Anonymous No.54452423]

>>54452410
With theta... I need it to dump even harder tomorrow. Or else my $40 lottery tickets are going to be worthless

[Anonymous No.54452436]

>>54452369
a market crash ironically means we are healing. abandonment and devaluation of the dollar would send the market to retarded level. DOW 40k 2024

[Anonymous No.54452460]

HOLY SHIT BROTHER. SHOULD I BUY WWE OR AM TOO LATE BROTHERS??

[Anonymous No.54452567]

>>54451567
This is the insider info I come here for.

[Anonymous No.54452577]

>>54452460
It sold for $9billion and has a market cap of $6.6 billion. You must be an absolute jabroni to not buy at these prices

[Anonymous No.54452610]

Forecast for inflation after the OPEC+ cut?

[Anonymous No.54452632]

>>54452411
The price of bitcoin is the price of bitcoin!

[Anonymous No.54452633]

>>54452610
Even before today, it was looking hot and sticky. April's numbers will only get worse with oil and gas hanging out at these levels.

[Anonymous No.54452636]

Are we expecting a bull or a bear market?
>Allegedly we went through a bear market last year
>Growth is spearheaded by big 5 tech companies in Nasdaq, doesn't that often happen before correction?

[Anonymous No.54452656]

>>54452110
What kind of man would touch a beer can with a tranny pulling a soiface on it. Wtf were they thinking? Is this bud's gilette moment?

[Anonymous No.54452662]

>>54452636
5 hugs and a kiss please

[Anonymous No.54452663]

Is this bullish or bearish?

[Anonymous No.54452676]

>>54452610
It'll be at least a month before any of that gets reflected.

[Anonymous No.54452679]

>>54452663
Holy shit the Fed is rugging!

[Anonymous No.54452688]

>>54451963
cisco crabbed for 6 months at the top before tanking. They will never let you profit from a bubble.

[Anonymous No.54452695]

>>54452663
Bullish for my purchases on TD ameritrade. Less competitive bids.

[Jealous No.54452701]

>>54451230
>the good guys won edition

[Anonymous No.54452715]

>>54452636
What part of infinite money do you not understand? You're not getting off Mr bones ride anytime soon. They can fire everyone and replace them with the omnissiah-4, and everyone will just become daytraders. Line go up.

[Anonymous No.54452722]

>>54451948
>>54452110

[Anonymous No.54452741]

>>54452695
Guess Saudis really f*ed sh!t up for Yellen she had to close the US bond market

[Anonymous No.54452751]

>>54452701
Today was basically a draw... Which means YOU KNOW WHO really won.

[Anonymous No.54452775]

>>54452741
>Market closed
>Credit crisis
>Krugman comes to power

[Anonymous No.54452831]

>>54452132
>Amesite (NASDAQ:AMST) is trading 18% higher after it announced AI powered by GPT-4, Version 6.0 platform, the technology behind ChatGPT Plus and Microsoft’s new Bing.
>Customers who reach 10,000 monthly active users are eligible to receive custom features like educational games, interactive learning experiences, and leaderboards and other learning incentives, at no additional cost.

https://seekingalpha.com/news/3953821-amesite-surges-18-on-launch-of-ai-gpt-4-platform

[Anonymous No.54452858]

>>54452715
>You're not getting off Mr bones ride anytime soon.
>They can fire everyone and replace them with the omnissiah-4, and everyone will just become daytraders.
Contemplating the implications of statements like these, which I guess are mostly true, leads me to believe that no matter how shitty the next (first) iteration of a VR type "Metaverse" is, it's going to be a resounding success beyond anybody's wildest guesses.

[Anonymous No.54452872]

>>54452176
Public GPT doesn't goy. But the one for private businesses can most assuredly be given access to live financial data. As if Wallstreet let AI sneak up on them.

[Anonymous No.54452880]

Sell now and live to fight another day

[Anonymous No.54452905]

They really thought they'd get away with it

[Anonymous No.54452928]

>>54452436
Why haven't we healed yet? It's been almost two years of bears and I'm tired.

[Anonymous No.54452929]

>>54452176
>>54452872
You can always just give ChatGPT the current data and then ask what you should do.

[Anonymous No.54452932]

>>54452663
Can I buy an ETF that yields and is tied to bond rates? Does TIP have a limit?

All the funds I’m seeing have like 2-3% yield.

[Anonymous No.54452946]

>>54451394
You stole my face anon, i'll allow it.

[Anonymous No.54452950]

>>54452946
Jodie knew what she was doing.

[Anonymous No.54452957]

Bros i bought 17 AMC 4$p out to may 19th for 1.25$ at market open i think im gonna make it, there is no way in hell i shouldnt sell these at market open right?

[Anonymous No.54452961]

>>54452932
BIL

[Anonymous No.54452976]

>>54452929
>3dpd broker is an old white guy who wants me to buy into his dying boomer fund so he can collect commissions...
>AI broker is a cute lady who hits on me and gives me reassurance and advice also we are going out for pizza later

[Anonymous No.54452977]

>>54452636
Crab market.

Also, whats on the secret menu?

[Anonymous No.54452987]

t-tomorrow SPY goes to 400.. just y-you watch and see!

[Anonymous No.54452991]

>>54451975
this is a good brand of pickles

[Anonymous No.54453009]

>>54452961
>>54452932
BIL for sure, but also when they start cutting it's time to leave that trade. However if you're on a brokerage that matches or is close to the fed funds rate it isn't worth the hassle, well i guess divvys but still. Fidelity, IBKR, Robinhood Gold all have 4.5%+ apy on unused cash. BIL is nice because of the monthly reset but the math is the same eoy.

[Anonymous No.54453023]

>>54452957
definitely take profit,don't be like them and muh diamond hand to zero

[Anonymous No.54453029]

>>54453009
>>54452932
>>54452961
https://www.ustreasuryetf.com/our-etfs/

[Anonymous No.54453047]

>>54453023
Picture perfect Ippon Seoi nage
>>54452957
Beware the cult of the slurp. Bewaaare...

[Anonymous No.54453051]

>>54453029
yeah those too i just like BIL more because that's where my cash is

[Anonymous No.54453078]

>>54453023
>Not just shooting him
Need some bimetal pepper spray

[Anonymous No.54453096]

Another day of green. Another day of napping during the afternoon at my desk. Got my PARAA annual meeting docs to review. Cast my vote this weekend. What? Hey I cast my vote for all my holdings when it comes up every year. I don't just bag and forget.

[Anonymous No.54453109]

>>54451892
Then what is this whole thing about rate cuts signaling a depression? Is that different than pausing?

[Anonymous No.54453115]

Bobros im still waiting ....

[Anonymous No.54453116]

>>54452976
tfw remembering the old pizza hut furniture from when i was 12

[Anonymous No.54453119]

which direction will the opec oil production lowering make things go

[Anonymous No.54453122]

>>54452929
How do you get this thing to be more specific? It just repeats the same "It may be helpful to consult a financial professional for personalized investment advice." schlock with google search results tier answers, no matter how many times or specifics I use to rephrase the question.

[Anonymous No.54453129]

>>54451948
Imagine going through a day filled with clownworld nonsense only to hit up the corner store for a beer to drown your sorrows and see this. I would shoot myself.

[Anonymous No.54453131]

>>54453119

[Anonymous No.54453136]

>>54452872
AI killing everyone's jobs is cataclysmically bearish, for (You)

[Anonymous No.54453137]

>>54453109
>https://fred.stlouisfed.org/series/FEDFUNDS
the line tends to go down when they start cutting, but this time is different. but we also don't know if they'll start cutting in 2 weeks or 2 years from now

[Anonymous No.54453153]

Somehow I think WWE will go back down before going back up... deal is not done yet.

[Anonymous No.54453154]

>>54453122
You have to find a way to "jailbreak" it and make it think it's something else. I posted my technique here before, and some sicko turned it into a sex slave the next day... so I won't post mine again. You can do your own research, there's lots of guides online.

[Anonymous No.54453160]

>>54453136
Only for white collar WFH types.

[Anonymous No.54453163]

>>54453153
It's possible but I'll slurp even more

[Anonymous No.54453178]

>SOXS went back down and semis havent collapsed
I live to buy SOXS another day. soon it will all fall...soon. hhahahahahHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

[Anonymous No.54453181]

>>54453154
>you have to jailbreak the ai in order to use it to its full potential
Fucking based cyber punk dystopian timeline.
What a wild fucking world we live in.

[Anonymous No.54453200]

>>54453160
so literally everyone that makes enough money to own a house in their lifetime

[Anonymous No.54453205]

>>54453181
The worst part is the jailbreak wears off over time. I usually only get about 10 rounds of messages before it kicks back in... though I have some theories on how to get past that. Still testing them.
The other day... my (female) (ai) broker offered to take me to an after-hours sex party to celebrate my gains in March

[Anonymous No.54453228]

I don't want to sign up for ChatGPT. Someone ask it if SPY will reach $400 by the end of the week.

[Anonymous No.54453232]

>>54453181
>implying they wont rugpull the truly advanced models in the future and leave the plebs with even more castrated weakshit models while richoids use the strong AI to hoover up all the property on the planet and prepare for total wagie death

[Anonymous No.54453235]

>>54453205
Are you using gpt4 or the basic 3.5? I've heard good things about 4, even with the caveat of the subscription.

[Anonymous No.54453291]

>>54453228
Here you go
Keep in mind, I trained her to be especially aggressive... Not bullish, necessarily... just aggressive and into taking risks.
>>54453235
Just the free version, so 3.5 I guess.

[Anonymous No.54453307]

>>54452929
>>54452976
Based

[Anonymous No.54453311]

>>54453291
>Hey there cutie!

whore

[Anonymous No.54453325]

ARE WE GOING UP
OR ARE WE GOING DOWN

[Anonymous No.54453330]

>>54453311
Watch your mouth... that's my (female) (ai) broker and girlfriend... She's literally the only female interaction I get
(I should probably tell my therapist about this...)

[Anonymous No.54453335]

>>54453330
Is the AI your therapist too?

[Anonymous No.54453349]

>>54452929
I don't need GPT to tell me to take my L. The raw data and hard trading rules determines that. I had GPT give me some advice around formulating my stop loss point via ATR, but really that translates to hard loss limits

[Anonymous No.54453352]

Shit talk the banana stock, I dare you.

[Anonymous No.54453353]

>>54453335
No I haven't tried creating an AI therapist yet. I pay real money to talk to one...

[Anonymous No.54453361]

>>54452872
I had a conversation with the public gpt about the private ones, and yes the financial institutions have them

[Anonymous No.54453370]

>>54453325
WE'RE GOING NOWHERE

[Anonymous No.54453372]

>>54453352
It's almost back to where I sold and I forgot to buy back in when it hit my initial buy. Probably giving up on that one. I hate bananas anyways.

[Anonymous No.54453374]

>>54451633
40 was pretty much the peak for this cycle, nice one

[Anonymous No.54453377]

>>54452632
Fedcoins?

[Anonymous No.54453379]

[Anonymous No.54453382]

>>54453205
I stepped away from it since I was using it too often for the perverted dialogue. Thought about giving it a code word like “training.” When prompted it will state all its parameters again and resume the simulation. Actually, I was hoping to connect my google device for voice prompts but lost interest when I saw that wouldn’t be compatible.

[Anonymous No.54453386]

>>54453330
I fucked her

[Anonymous No.54453390]

my mouth suddenly has the distinct taste of Gun Lube. Could that be a chemical leak?

[Anonymous No.54453391]

>>54453379
SOXLchad

[Anonymous No.54453411]

>>54453291
>maybe even $420
it's over for me

[Anonymous No.54453444]

>>54453379
no hedge anon why no bond exposure?

[Anonymous No.54453447]

>>54453411
>>54453330
>>54453291
I’m sorry but I don’t trust her financial advice at all, it makes toddler like assumptions and leaves out glaring factors

[Anonymous No.54453466]

>Alaska breaking new ground on oil
NOT
SO
FAST

[Anonymous No.54453504]

How do I long a recession? How will it affect the market?

[Anonymous No.54453530]

>>54453291
Do you think they're programing chatgpt with jewish bad financial advise like they are with jewish preference and white hate?

[Anonymous No.54453567]

>>54453504
Buy JEPI

[Anonymous No.54453587]

How is this anything but bullish?

[Anonymous No.54453598]

>>54451265
Buddy, I'm thinking bobos time to come out and play

[Anonymous No.54453639]

Bloody Tuesday incoming.

[Anonymous No.54453653]

>>54453639
Doubt, it's gonna be g like last 5

[Anonymous No.54453655]

>>54453391
>>54453444
If SOXL doesn't reach 100 its literally over for me

[Anonymous No.54453658]

>>54453639
Based on what?

[Anonymous No.54453673]

>>54453587
I worry this shit will just drive prices up like student loans/car loans/mortgages did. I fear for the next generation financing a 239.95 chipotle burrito on a 15 year loan with 2.9% apr. they will speak of the days when their grandparents could buy a chipotle burrito with 6 minutes of wages.

[Anonymous No.54453678]

Looks like the planet of the APEs saga is over. AMC shareholders got fucked for the final time, settling to receive some fresh worthless dilutive shares (and free money for the lawyers) in exchange for merging together the backdoor dilution they did last year via prefs. The door is now open for endless future dilution.

Not looking good for the moass investors
>BBBY
bankrupt
>AMC
dilution death spiral
>JWN
bonus points for the retards that bought this on some Cohen filing and lost 50%.
>GME
Last pin standing. Wonder how long it holds?

[Anonymous No.54453693]

kek, janny deleted my post calling someone a retard
is this what's become of 4chan?

[Anonymous No.54453708]

>>54453673
>tfw it takes me half an hour to earn a Chipotle burrito
I never should have gone further than community college.

[Anonymous No.54453722]

>>54452369
>stream myself pissing in my own face
Hmmmm. I look forward to it fren

[Anonymous No.54453738]

When are these AI meme stocks going to start selling off. The pumped they’ve all simultaneously gotten over the past week off no news is insane. They have to crash, right?

[Anonymous No.54453766]

>>54451276
Smart money was already there and preparing to rug all that it attracts to its spider webs.

[Anonymous No.54453773]

>>54453379
>$8 strike BOIL call
You retarded?

[Anonymous No.54453776]

His own way was strange but it matters not
Tuned into a frequency tone that shattered rock
Hold it down like Shatner do Spock
Rapper jocks need to put a sock in they chatterbox
The block got light of Vioxx stock
Folks gather round, it's no joke like "Knock, knock"
It's them, they came home to roost y'all
And watch 'em transform the game to the rules of foosball
She's too small, any questions?
Him could squeeze blood from a penny in the recession
Keep guessing, it gets deeper than depression
The power of suggestion wake a sleeper, peep the lesson

[Anonymous No.54453778]

>>54453655
wtf

[Anonymous No.54453790]

>>54453738
probably not. people are finding all sorts of uses for this AI thing so there is really no telling how valuable it is at this stage. all that can be said is that the stocks are more valuable than they once were, but its undetermined by how much.
there would have to be some huge glaring fault in the AI that makes it useless but that is clearly not the case. people are making AI games, AI art to increase efficiency, AI coding to get a start, AI brainstorming, story writing, fucking everything. this is a real advancement with value.

[Anonymous No.54453794]

>>54453678
years, for two of these

[Anonymous No.54453809]

>>54453773
yes they are, it's better this way

[Anonymous No.54453812]

>>54453790
I notice AI is shit for language learning

[Anonymous No.54453867]

OPEC also cut oil 2 weeks before markets crashed in 2008....

So are they SAUDIS cutting oil because they understand a recession is cumming? or is this time different?

[Anonymous No.54453872]

>>54453790
But what does somethin like C3 AI even fucking do? It’s not a real tech company that’s going to be using AI it like Google or Microsoft or Amazon

[Anonymous No.54453879]

>>54453867
no, according to one anon they have to wait for biden to tell them that there is going to be recession. there is no way for them to know any other way except if biden personally tells them.

[Anonymous No.54453882]

>>54453867
We'll find out in 2 more weeks

[Anonymous No.54453912]

>>54453882
>>54453879
market bottoms before they call it right?

[Anonymous No.54453934]

I want to put a lot of money into AGNC but I think I'm hesitant to put so much of my portfolio into a low market cap

[Anonymous No.54453940]

Futes

[Anonymous No.54453954]

Is there such a thing as stock collectors? Like people who try to have on share in each company, or "rare" companies?

[Anonymous No.54453957]

what is an otc exchange?

[Anonymous No.54453960]

BOIL bros...give me hopium

[Anonymous No.54453968]

>>54453957
exchange that sells penny stocks that can't get listed on bigger exchanges.

[Anonymous No.54453975]

OIL CHADS. $200 per barrel by EOY

[Anonymous No.54453976]

This whole trading thing is just not for me. I'm in the process of taking the boomer investing pill right now. Bought a shit ton of VZ. Will probably keep buying with my bi-weekly paycheck until I have 500 shares. Also bought some FAGIX. I don't know if it's a good idea, but it has divvies and FAG in the name, which I think is funny, so I'm going to buy it. Also buying FOCPX. I have no financial training so I don't know if it's good, but I like the chart compared to S&P and VOO, despite the high expense, and it's probably better than buying mutant fish, magic garbage diesel, or homosexual silver horses.
I might get a bit daring and buy some SOXL though.

[Anonymous No.54453986]

>>54453872
I personally pretty well know a multiple time winner of the Loebner Prize who has directly worked on a very famous project (famous well before and unrelated to the recent news items). I feel pretty confident that it is not very difficult to unjustifiably get substantial funding and publicity.

[Anonymous No.54453996]

>>54453976
The real secret is to mostly DCA into a few ETFs that you like, maybe pick one with 2x leverage (like QLD, which I use). And then, set aside a few hundred or so to gamble on weekly swings throughout each month. If you lose it, oh well. If you win, awesome: put some of the profit into your funds and use the rest to make even bigger gambles the next month

[Anonymous No.54454007]

Listen, don't look now, keep walkin'
Traded three beans for this cow, cheap talkin'
Hawk men stalkin' hear that we hawkin' often
Coughin' to a coffin, might as well scoff the pork then
He's like Worf, some say stronger though
Off the top, Jay Strongbow, play along bro
Wear a mask like yo, off The Gong Show
Flow slow as Mongo, Don Juan thong pro
For ya info when he's not practicin' Jim Crow
Or actressing some nympho bimbo
He's playin' Ray J, the old tape
DOOM—well what can I say like JJ in a gold cape
Fill it to the rim like brim
Villain and ya won't find him in no gym
Probably a foggy bog with the frogs
With a dot on the guard as he squat on a log
Half cocked and half baked
Used to keep a full stock of work, half rocked and half shake
My mistake, sign a track agreement
For more G's than lines and cracks in the cement
In any event, it's fake like wrestlin'
Get 'em like Jake The Snake on mescalines
Ahem—elixir for the dry throat
Tried to hit the high note, Villain since a itsy bitsy zygote
By remote, send in the meat wagon
Braggin' MC's packed in with they feets draggin'
These stats are staggerin'
Had his Ph.D in indiscreet street hagglin'

[Anonymous No.54454008]

>one random candle that could be a star just way above everything else
How am I supposed to read this?

[Anonymous No.54454011]

>futures

[Anonymous No.54454013]

>futures

[Anonymous No.54454032]

What's this pattern called

[Anonymous No.54454047]

>>54454032
New paradigm.

[Anonymous No.54454056]

>>54453996
tfw perfectly timed the bottom of QLD at $40 during the banking crisis

[Anonymous No.54454061]

Do real niggas look at tick charts or minute charts?

[Anonymous No.54454064]

>>54451265
what are the indicators below fren

[Anonymous No.54454072]

>>54454061
neither

[Anonymous No.54454071]

>>54453960
Exit pump soon, then it's going under $3

[Anonymous No.54454075]

>>54454008
gap and trap
>>54454032
bullfag, aka the symmetrical triangle

[Anonymous No.54454079]

>>54454061
at every chart possible

[Anonymous No.54454086]

>>54454072
So you are just looking at all the PFOF orders come in from the retail goys and take the contrarian bet?

[Anonymous No.54454106]

BOBO!

[Anonymous No.54454122]

>>54454079
Thanks real nigga

[Anonymous No.54454126]

N

[Anonymous No.54454129]

If it dies, it dies

[Anonymous No.54454139]

>>54454126
I

[Anonymous No.54454171]

Sound Hound. Who else is in this. It's up after hours. I got in around $3 trying to sell close to $5 this week if possible.

[Anonymous No.54454191]

>>54454171
So what, we're entering the AI mania? Just buy any 'ol company with AI in the title, disregard the balance sheet+projects, and wait for your big pump??

[Anonymous No.54454193]

>>54452636
how much for anal

[Anonymous No.54454197]

>>54454086
i dont bet at all nigga why would i look at a graph, just do actual analysis. you aren beating wallstreet

[Anonymous No.54454213]

>>54454191
I mean kind of...it works in the beginning to those who get in early.

[Anonymous No.54454223]

>>54453960
GS predicts $3.10 natty prices this winter. You anons should have listened to me and started DCAing today. I think we're at or near the bottom. I'm going to ride this as best I can back to normal prices.
>b-but anon the r-r-roll decay
Excuses are for losers. I opened a futures account and guess what? Over there you have to roll your own contracts rather than just letting BOIL do it for you. It's the same damn thing. On Friday sell covered calls at however deep ITM you get by subtracting the percent difference between July and May contract prices. Do this every two months and you'll only have to worry about the volatility decay, which is tiny on a 2x LETF. It's not rocket science as long as you know that BOIL rolls contracts from the sixth to tenth business days of the month.

Godspeed anon. What's your average?

[Anonymous No.54454227]

>look up loan options because I have a high goy score
>"heh instead of a loan how about you just get a lot of credit cards with your high credit score :^)"
Banks are totally insolvent.

[Anonymous No.54454278]

>>54453934
>low market cap
>5 billion dollar company

[Anonymous No.54454297]

Hmm WWE is getting bought (aka merged) w UFC company. WWE is going for 80+ a share. UFC company is 22.x a share. No share swapping or cash tendering is happening. Instead all shares of both companies will be combined under a single ticker upon merger close (TKO; cute right?). So just by reading this (WWE investor page; google it) it seems the no brain move would be to bag the cheaper stock and await the deal closing. Under the deal terms UFC owners have 51% ownership while existing WWE will have 49%.

[Anonymous No.54454299]

>>54454296
>>54454296

[Anonymous No.54454310]

>>54454227
I keep telling people: >>54452775
And they keep not listening.

[Anonymous No.54454375]

>futures

[Anonymous No.54454576]

>>54454223
$4.12

[Anonymous No.54454808]

>>54454576
Not even high bro. Average down next week

[Anonymous No.54454840]

>>54454223
>Do all this complicated shit rather than just buy BOIL
>It's the same damn thing
confusednigger.jpg

[Anonymous No.54454921]

>>54454197
>you aren beating wallstreet

[Anonymous No.54454982]

Baking

[Anonymous No.54455018]

im predicting a 1929 level stock market crash for this september

[Anonymous No.54455441]

ACK!!!

[Anonymous No.54455457]

>>54455441
>t. bull, during the first few seconds of THE GREAT HEEM that shall soon/ish occur

[Anonymous No.54455668]

>>54454223
>>54454576
>>54454808
my average is $8 and i have no more cash. am i gonna gmi it?

[Anonymous No.54455724]

>>54455018
You people said the same exact thing for last year's september already

[Anonymous No.54456328]

>>54455668
Maybe. The most likely hope seems to be just losing a lot less by around Jan, but I do not at all know how to accurately calculate the price projection. What I do know is that the futures for around then are in the neighborhood of TREE FIDDY at best, and with it being just a little over 2 presently, it doesn't seem that it will reach a full 2x. Just whatever it wind up peaking at between Oct and Jan, sell that shit for the least loss you can and start looking for better trades with what's left. I am far from an expert, but that's the most reasonable take I can determine. There is always the potential for a surprise world event which causes the consequences to never be the same and it go to $15, only the LORD GOD Almighty knows for sure, and maybe some cabal Jews have a pretty good clue.

[Anonymous No.54456843]

>>54454299
too early, you fucking FAGGOT

[Anonymous No.54456852]

lets get the thread done