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/biz/ - Business & Finance

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54021833 No.54021833 [Reply] [Original] [archived.moe]

New edition

>Educational sites:

>Financial TV Streams:




>Pre-Market and Live data:


>Boomer Investing 101:


Previous >>54019143

>> No.54021881

im not a player, i throw up a lot

>> No.54021900 [DELETED] 
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>> No.54021930

Are long term bond ETFs the most undervalued thing to buy? Zoom out, it looks juicy

>> No.54021932

Is jews going out of business?

>> No.54021934 [DELETED] 

i'm sorry you want to kill yourself, glowie.

>> No.54021937 [DELETED] 
File: 153 KB, 889x1200, miko83.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

Hey buncun, how's your bunny wife?

>> No.54021951
File: 3.48 MB, 1920x1080, Back to us.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

Only the unluckiest ones.

>> No.54021955
File: 34 KB, 500x500, Peter Schiff.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

he's live

>> No.54021962
File: 62 KB, 1080x1080, abigail-shapiro.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

annihilate them with my cock u mean

>> No.54021969

No, I am quite successful.
All who've tried yet have perished. Do your worst.

>> No.54021981
File: 52 KB, 768x512, AugustinCarstens.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

Your money is save with my balance sheet

>> No.54022006

>your uninsured deposits over 250k will be eaten cash raw

>> No.54022010
File: 47 KB, 400x460, Laughter in Spanish stops.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

You're lending Joe Biden, Kamala Harris, Chuck Schumer, and Kevin McCarthy money? For up to 30 years?

>> No.54022049

why would i ever put so much money into the bank? use that money for stocks, fonds, your home or something else. or use a different bank until you hit the insurance limit again and again and again

>> No.54022076

I'm specifically referring to TLT/TMF

>> No.54022095
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>> No.54022099
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>> No.54022118

wtf does the red mean?
why is capital one marked with red text? does that mean it’s going under?

>> No.54022132

Yes, and what's the profile of the underlying loans for those?

Subprime mortgage backed securities were looking like *juicy* high yield, sure winners in 2006.

>> No.54022155

>chief of diversity
KEK this shit will never not be funny

>> No.54022163
File: 94 KB, 1920x1080, 1672969547274850.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>It's a long way down.

>> No.54022175
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>> No.54022176
File: 132 KB, 1126x720, CEO of Prosperity.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]


>> No.54022191

This will not be over until the market dumps on a lower-than-expected rate hike; rather than pumps.

>> No.54022196
File: 489 KB, 1804x1140, Fq4xWtJakAAQT6c.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

next week is going to be a bloodbath

>> No.54022213

>he just pays taxes and doesnt want the feds to pay him back instead
Joe not forgiving student loans means he can pay my bonds now.

>> No.54022215

Well look at you, Mr. Optimist, assuming the markets will be kept open.

>> No.54022216
File: 2.67 MB, 4000x3000, IMG_20230310_154049655.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

It's definitely nice living next to a Mediterranean restaurant. What is /smg/ having for dinner?

>> No.54022230
File: 113 KB, 622x616, Screenshot_20230310_162425.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

imagine trying to make money is a loser market when you can get 5% guaranteed

>> No.54022232

Kek @ JPM tard pumping

>> No.54022234

>remove reserve requirements so banks go full degen and have no cash on hand.
>have everyone pull out of the stock market and go cash gang due to "recession inc"
>Banks fail
>Money disappears

>> No.54022245
File: 1.89 MB, 360x640, seagull time.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

How do I find women-run companies to short? I keep EVFM in my portfolio at a 99.5% loss as a reminder to never trust girlbosses.

>> No.54022256

just eat your meds anon

>> No.54022258

>kept open

kek you mean like 'system freezes' and other suspicious shit?

>> No.54022265
File: 38 KB, 680x663, suffer2.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

Yeah it's gonna be something. I remember back in March 2020 everytime the markets closed down on Friday you fucking knew shit was going to be double fucked come Monday morning
>it always was

>> No.54022266

you could start with amd and oxy

>> No.54022269

A bag of bell peppers given to me by an anime girl in front of Kroger.

>> No.54022277


>> No.54022281

Jesus anon clean up your kitchen.
I had a salmon salad with a piece of homemade bread

>> No.54022282
File: 84 KB, 680x963, Qui gf.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

INTC coming up green like a festering boil ready to be popped.
Quit noticing.

>> No.54022284

>bought ATM 0dte put options today
>all trades went in the right direction
>none of them went up in any significant value

How do people make money off this shit? Just buy way the fuck OTM? ATM/ITM on 0dte doesnt do jack shit for any serious profit, considering the risk you're taking on buying these on the day of expiration. What am I doing wrong? No they were not IV crushed either.

>> No.54022285

I wish I had nice teeth

>> No.54022298
File: 3 KB, 409x74, Nononononono.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

Official freezes, unofficial freezes, tomato potahto.

>> No.54022300
File: 300 KB, 870x902, 16718504230753242.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

reminder that you can always sell yourself to come back from bankruptcy

>> No.54022309

no bond ETF, leveraged or not, is going to triple. think about what that would entail--the bond ETF holds a whole bunch of treasuries. for a 3x ETF to triple, the underlying security would have to go up 100%. there is no way 20+ year treasury securities double in less than a decade.

>> No.54022313
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God I hope so.

>> No.54022319

someone's getting Mossad'd tonight

>> No.54022323

Me in the bottom right

>> No.54022328

Thot status: patrolled
Yeah I know. I've been doing a lot of cooking lately and have made a mess

>> No.54022334
File: 766 KB, 600x2644, chiding_lecture.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

What did kek mean by these digits? Is it time to short the SHE and NACP ponzis to the ground?

>> No.54022336

Im a baggie :(

>> No.54022337

fuck I forget my vpn.
remember me bros.

>> No.54022344

many such cases

>> No.54022350
File: 29 KB, 699x515, Untitled.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

what the fuck went wrong?

>> No.54022356

Fractional reserve lending should be considered fraud

>> No.54022363

You did this to yourself. We warned you for an entire year.

>> No.54022376

Looks like ordinary shitstock p&d to me

>> No.54022383

Stop buying options exposing yourself to vega and simply short the shares directly instead. If you're scared and need a pacifier, I mean hedge, buy some OTM calls

>> No.54022384
File: 1006 KB, 720x408, China bus.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>Chink vaporware but now an EV

>> No.54022399

>Chinese ADR
well there's that for starters

>> No.54022407
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>> No.54022426
File: 16 KB, 474x248, 1662167502685089.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>>bought ATM 0dte put options today
You guys never learn

>> No.54022429
File: 432 KB, 860x779, 345-3451910_moe-cute-anime-anime-girl-sitting-png-transparent.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

ASMB stock ladies!

>> No.54022432

Scraping options order flow, we have lots of sell pressure on short VIX and short long-dated treasury positions. Lots of sell pressure on LVS KMX, and NCLH to close out the day. COST is one of the few with a lot of buying pressure. Long-dated options volumes this week are eerily low. Expect VIX to rise on Monday, and the yield inversion to get deeper. Signs point to a market dip and an already-in-progress recession.

>> No.54022434
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Dude shut the fuck up.

>> No.54022437

Apparently I count towards DEI initiatives in office environments as an Indian male. In an office that is already 60% indian.

>> No.54022438

Puts on JPM

>> No.54022441
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Chinks. That's what happened.

>> No.54022453
File: 179 KB, 366x383, Zen thumbs up Powell.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]


>> No.54022465

Makes me want to re-read The Masque of the Red Death
don't know why...

>> No.54022467

Well yeah...diversity is just a euphemism for not white

>> No.54022475

How's that news to you lmao

>> No.54022485


I didnt lose any money and the trades went in my direction, but I see all these stories on the internet of people who turn like $200 into $20,000 on 0dte options. What are they doing exactly? My 0dtes printed exactly the same p/l's intraday as options that I've bought before for swing trades 60+ days out until expiration.

>> No.54022490

Way too late for that. Should have bought them last week

>> No.54022491
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Fucks sake

>> No.54022493
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Why bother actually running the bank and safeguarding investors' money when there are so much more important things to worry about like the exact ratio of vagina to melanin in the building at all times

>> No.54022508

Hi, thanks for your cash, don't worry, we'll take it to a casino and bet it all on black, and give you 05% if it wins!
Can't lose.

>> No.54022512

Chink tech firms had to go thru SVB since JPM and others wouldn’t service them... Chinks got a chink style rug pull

>> No.54022513

>my calls have 100+ days remaining

Sup fucking idiots, decay wont even impact me for months. I can take a crab or two.

>> No.54022517
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Any casino that lets someone make arbitrarily high bets is at risk of going bankrupt because they wouldn't be exercising proper risk sizing. Le ebin beat the casino guy stories are a form of casino shilling, because if any of it worked someone with any sort of mathematical competence can simply modify or obfuscate the successful function to walk home rich. Meanwhile, casinos are playing the exact same fucking games they have for decades with strangers on an open door basis. What actually happens:
>some dumbass with a lot of money goes into casino
>tries to hike up stakes arbitrarily high to cover his exponential loss
>"Sir, our establishment does not allow you to bet N*2^12 dollars on a single game of roulette, please lower your wager if you want to keep playing with us."
>"I've done it, I've beaten Vegas!"

>> No.54022519
File: 1.67 MB, 1474x900, 1629380110742.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

like poetry

>> No.54022534

>What are they doing exactly?
Getting lucky

>> No.54022563
File: 1.15 MB, 1023x1022, chicken.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

How do I withdraw my money from the bank? Do I literally just walk up and say "give me $20k in cash"?

>> No.54022571

Holy shit
First Y-combinator shill was on talking about a national security threat and now the fucking anchors in other segments in CNBC are talking about a potential hacking danger/opportunity that this opens up.

What the fuck are these shills up to?

>> No.54022574

The engineering team at my company is 90% indian and the sales team is 90% white. maybe they should do a trade off so we get some of those big burly whites in the office to make some banter with us SQL virgins

>> No.54022577

>Inclusion Ignites Innovation
Only thing they managed to ignite was a garbage fire lmao get smoked DEIgenerates

>> No.54022599
File: 1.57 MB, 994x888, Screen Shot 2023-03-10 at 2.43.59 PM.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>NYPD reportedly were called to Silicon Valley Bank branch as depositors attempt to pull cash, per NYP.

>> No.54022605

Checking? Yes that's basically it. Savings? You tell them you'd like to close your account and they get like 3 days or so to get you the money I believe.

>> No.54022619

Fuck i have 500 shares of this shit

>> No.54022621
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>> No.54022622

Just trying to gaslight the government into bailling them out since national security is a big boogieman for spooks

>> No.54022634

Sell short the option depending on the direction, dont buy.

>> No.54022636

You fill out a withdrawal slip, you fucking looney toon. If you ask like your post indicates, you’ll experience a “wait” while the teller presses the panic button.

Fill out a form for your account and say that you are withdrawing that amount of money from (insert account that you own that has said money)

Don’t be autistic at the bank, you might get shot. And then you’ll be a story in CNN amongst all this fucking wildness going on…probably causing more panic and conspiracy theories about the state of the economy and liquidity issues.
>if they shot an autistic man for trying to pull money out that means the sky is falling! Panic!!

>> No.54022638

I always thought I was smart because I was in advanced classes in middle school and I DCA into mutual funds. But I got my results back from an IQ test and it said I’m only 105IQ. I feel like my personality is gone. I thought I was the “smart” guy.

>> No.54022646

How bad would things have to get for Fidelity to implode

>> No.54022649

You do realize that you might vega exposure when you're BUYING options? Right? I know what youre trying to say but you're saying it all backwards.

Vega exposure is great for convex payouts.

When rvol beats ivol, you say, damn, I wish i had vega exposure

When ivol beats rvol, you say, damn, I wish I didn't have as much vega exposure

>> No.54022659
File: 212 KB, 613x713, Selection_201.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

Which one of you lying dishonest cheaters is responsible for this?

>> No.54022677

And lose their 90% diversity score in your department? I think not. Instead they'll be firing the sales team to make space for more indians. Yay, diversity!

>> No.54022690

I wonder what a modern version of this will be like

>> No.54022712

This has literally always been the case in tech companies, my school shooter friend. Sales team = white, engineering team = indian/asian

My sister was the only Indian sales / biz dev at her old tech co, but the whole entire engineering floor was desi.

>> No.54022713

You won't have to ponder for too long :^)

>> No.54022714 [DELETED] 
File: 422 KB, 973x849, frog.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

C-can I at least do it from the drive through so that I don't need face to face contact?

>> No.54022740

Is this what zoom zoom poo in loos actually believe? Hilarious.

>> No.54022749

I once got a full scholarship offered for "People of color" just because my last name is generically Spanish.

>> No.54022754
File: 58 KB, 907x236, HMMMM.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

funny how some people have a great sense of timing, isn't it?

>> No.54022759

Well... whose fault is that?

>> No.54022772

I don't really consider shitty all-white Midwestern CRUD firms as real tech companies doing anything cutting edge so that doesn't count. I had an offer at an all-white Midwestern CRUD firm in Madison, Wisconsin and I figured I would want to hang myself after 6 months at a place like that. Just fucking white people with zero ambition to do anything cutting edge in the space.

>> No.54022773

You are. By the standards of modern, diversity riddled America, 105 IQ makes you a fucking von Neumann.

>> No.54022775
File: 24 KB, 589x132, Screenshot 2023-03-10 224525.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>No, my irrelevant VC Bank is in danger. Biden do something!

I hate pseudolibertarian Sillicon schnozzes, who think taking risk means the goverment should bail them out.

>> No.54022790


>> No.54022791
File: 1 KB, 295x33, mm.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

Worked some jewish maths and now it isn't as bad.

>> No.54022799
File: 361 KB, 750x608, Animal pet economic spectrum billboard.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

In terms of this chart, "eating cats and dogs" level. They don't take the same risks as banks but have similar safeguards as the FDIC for normie accounts.

>> No.54022803

Legit thought /ourguy/ Sacks was better than that
>I know I know

>> No.54022807

banks dont have 20k in cash on hand. They'll have to order it and have it delivered.

>> No.54022812

Lol what kind of dogshit startups has this guy got exposure to?

>> No.54022816

I will never make it because I will never be this “lucky”.

>> No.54022825
File: 279 KB, 622x383, cramer2.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

so many typos getting out over the air

>> No.54022828

When I got the bankers check for my down payment it was through the drivethrough and that was way more than 20k
So yeah probably

>> No.54022834
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>> No.54022848

This whole image is just a word salad of bullshit virtua signaling

>> No.54022852
File: 94 KB, 640x360, AKPLT9rZCjzdLEsgdUkWn_8RlTwTourQbswgxh3We8Y.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

jcomm man


>> No.54022855

>2020: “Cash is trash”
>2023: “Cash is gone”

>> No.54022856

Im bored and I dont know what to do. Tired of playing against the storm / bloons td

>> No.54022860
File: 735 KB, 980x1192, 45y345y.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

tech trannies begging for bailout

>> No.54022864

>the exact ratio of vagina to melanin

stealing this for the next woke "culture" meeting at work

>> No.54022876

Hello fellow Lexington anon

>> No.54022883

I didn't even read it. Anything from such a corporate looking image isn't going to be worth entering my thought space.

>> No.54022890

2008 was a fucking mistake

>> No.54022897
File: 288 KB, 821x1791, 1631249056887.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

Hey CRBP pajeet. Any plans this weekend? Gonna try and date a 70 year old white woman this time?

>> No.54022908
File: 145 KB, 870x565, KR.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

Very based
Too bad KR banks at SVB so they ran out of bell peppers irl

>> No.54022911


Tech cannot die fast enough.

>> No.54022914

the value of an option is based on a.) how far an option can go in the money and b.) how likely it is for that option to go into the money. making lots of money on speculative options means you have to follow the rule of buy low sell high.

buy low: you need to pick options that are cheap. the major factors that play into this are time to expiration (lower is cheaper), distance OTM/ITM (more OTM is cheaper), and volatility (lower is cheaper).

sell high: you need to pick options that you can sell for a profit. that means the option has the opposite of above--it needs to either be further dated (which can be done with calendar spreads), more ITM, or more volatile.

your problem is you hopped on the train too late. there's no such thing as a free lunch, making 100x trades doesn't happen on a whim. 0DTE options can be 100x profitable if a company makes a large, unexpected major move on a Friday during market hours. it truly has to be unexpected, which makes those sorts of trades hard, if not impossible, to find. those 0DTE winners are all just lucky lotto winners; very few replicate their success more than once.

the best way to get ahead of the game is to scout out companies that might make sudden, unexpected moves. if you can buy a LEAP on a company while there's very little IV, you can make tons of money on your prediction if things turn out the way you expected. The leddit guy who made all the money in GameStop was sitting on later 2020/early 2021 LEAPS purchased in 2019.

>> No.54022925

you dont eat rabbits regurlarly? they're fucken tasty

>> No.54022927
File: 2.51 MB, 286x258, 1635727175411.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

I love how people are scrambling saying "The Fed won't let the 15th largest bank collapse and die! Pivot now!" when in 08 the Fed let the 4th largest bank collapse and die. The Fear has only just begun.

>> No.54022943
File: 148 KB, 815x1373, Fq4yCsUWAAE9ID2.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

bros i am fucking dying from laughter. a bunch of biotech shitcos (like SAVA, etc) came out and ensured their retarded shareholder base that they do not have SVB exposure. picrel
I talked to this woman again yesterday. She's so strange. Like I don't even understand how the fuck someone as strange as her has kids.

>> No.54022954

It might be possible for TLT to hit 200. TLT is a mixed range of yields so it's not a 1:1 and bond prices in duration wouldn't have to double. May take negative rates, though, but in a mania like that TLT could triple or more. We have seen the power of meme pumps, and all the other scams are drying up so the classic boomer play may be next on the menu. TLT's price at that point would be largely unrelated to the magnitude of actual bond prices though.
TLT/TMF is a solid play. Old tricks are the best tricks don't count out the treasury bond yet.

>> No.54022959
File: 348 KB, 2090x1319, file.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

SJIM bros we're at all time high! How we feeling right now?

>> No.54022963

Meant to write "wondered", but yeah we're fucked lol

>> No.54022965

Thanks anon. Noted. I just won't scalp 0dte options then, it's not worth the risk.

>> No.54022973

if she has a real actual vagina it would be stranger for her to not have kids.

>> No.54022974

picrelated were all filings from today i think. it really makes me laugh that these mega bioturds who obviously have minimal exposure to SVB because it's mainly small private cos with exposure to SVB are trying to reassure shareholders

it hits my funny bone in one of the best kinds of ways

>> No.54022979

Americans do not, no. Like horses they're strictly pets.

Well, for now anyway.

>> No.54022983
File: 9 KB, 246x205, 4567u5467u.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>Do not worry sirs, we do not hold the SIVB coin sirs, all is well.

>> No.54022986
File: 198 KB, 1575x1154, 1678386742077748.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

Why is Adobe in "Software infrastructure" and not just "Software"?

>> No.54022988
File: 51 KB, 660x382, dividends-monopoly-man.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]


so much better collecting divies during a downturn than selling the underlying asset

>> No.54022996

When is this "recession" gonna fucking start already?

>> No.54023007

We didn't have sticky inflation either. Even if the FED wanted to save SVB, it is currently failing at another job that stands in the way. They can't risk a second wave of inflation to do that.

>> No.54023011

ok libtard i'm american and i shoot the rabbits in my yard every month or so and they're literally more tastier than store bought meat

>> No.54023016

>(what a shame)
lmao what the fuck did SAVA mean by that?

>> No.54023021

doubling of course, is possible with strong market forces. tripling is out of the realm of possibility.

>> No.54023024
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>> No.54023040

I nearly spit my fucking drink out when i read that because im sleep deprived rn and didnt really understand what was going on but it's actually the twitter account's own analysis, not the language DIRECTLY from the filing.

i laughed my ass off when i read that too

the guy who made that picture is a SAVA bear

>> No.54023052
File: 1.34 MB, 608x1080, 1644384497538.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

Have you asked her if she wants to try some of you cookie cookie?


>> No.54023053

>"Sorry no student loan forgiveness"
>"We need to bail out these millionaires!!!!"
This isn't gonna go down well in commiefornia

>> No.54023054

li'l shitposting got through apparently

>> No.54023059

notice the quote ends before that part

>> No.54023060

so what do they do in a financial crisis when they're already in money print mode?

>> No.54023067

SIGA bagholder here, are they exposed to SVB? Do you think I should sell SIGA at a loss or hold it?

>> No.54023069


>> No.54023075


>> No.54023076

if there will be one, it's likely already happening. "recession" is a backwards-looking indicator.

>> No.54023085

Wrong take. 50% of publicly traded tech companies with VC backing were with SVB. Those same people say would cry about it are actually the ones demanding the bailout/in.

>> No.54023088

Hey I remember this guy

>> No.54023102

Typically when the yield curve uninverts.

>> No.54023113

Between the two the latter is better but both are jewish nonsense built off of broken systems

>> No.54023118

I really hope they deny student loans and then bail out the banks. The chimpouts would be legendary

>> No.54023119

I remember when I was in Middle School / High School I loved watching the Office but now when I watch it (usually because of a woman) I physically cringe because its so unfunny

>> No.54023127

Well squirrels is also good eating too, Cletus. But the average American is not chomping down on Mr. Fluffers at the moment.

>> No.54023128

the average commifornian thinks that whatever the goverment does is the epitome of righteous morality as long as they have the (D)

>> No.54023129

It makes more sense, but for a second I thought they just went off the fucking rails

>> No.54023132
File: 133 KB, 591x720, 4e77a1bd2bbe48dbc664cd2770490c5f--the-wave-cola.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

Yep and EVEN IF THEY PIVOT. It will cause a worsening inflation crisis to get worse as it will cause MORE inflation and pressure the already battered consumer more. Here you want a funny little nugget.

I work for a distributor of Coca Cola, I talk with the Pepsi reps. Pepsi wants to increase sales by 13%, Coke wants a similar increase. It won't happen the stores are all pushing back at them and saying only as much as you need. The big Grocery stores are all preparing for a recession so they are blitzing people with Sales. The constant sales are unsustainable.

This is one tiny piece. This is Pop I am talking about not Oil, Wheat or something that matters. Shit is fucked. KO will endure don't worry we keep raising prices and people groan and buy it anyway it's like gas.

>> No.54023133
File: 10 KB, 240x240, 1664480116483412.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

nah it could triple. retard pumps are the new norm and it's coming back with the boomer classic of bonds. TLT and bonds aren't the same thing stop equating them as the same. but as for bond prices go fuck around with a bond calculator your self to see how different bond price action is, particularly when being translated into a basket owned by an ETF that probably also has hedge trades running to blur it even more. buy TLT. TMF if you want to gamble and probably lose your money, but you could hit it big.

>> No.54023135
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>> No.54023148
File: 1.59 MB, 1409x1125, file.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

Story's now official, no longer merely twitter threads.

>> No.54023152

Yes the office is dated humor. It's the same as will Ferrell for me. Used to find everything the guy did hilarious, now I can't even watch one of his movies.

>> No.54023153
File: 411 KB, 3168x3080, happypepe.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>jerome is pumping rates hard enough that I can afford the rural trailer home to attract wagie aspie gf to have sexoo with

This decade is looking up we are gonna make it my fellow autistic white bois.

>> No.54023159

>It makes more sense, but for a second I thought they just went off the fucking rails
Wait another few months and I'm sure you'll see SAVA go off the rails. I am getting real fucking lazy with my typing but im willing to vocaroo out a litany of insane shit that the CEO and SVP (husband and wife couple) of SAVA have been doing, besides the scientific fraud we all know about

>> No.54023161

No joke, they probably *should* have been indexing that FDIC limit to inflation. When was that $250k number even set?

>> No.54023179

>wagie aspie gf
where to find?? i want one

>> No.54023189

>Go to your bank
>ask for your money
>we don't have it
>you go to jail
Man the Jews really have made the perfect system for themselves haven't they?

>> No.54023190

Why the fuck do you (still?) have money in SIGA? There's not an mpox case in sight. Every smallpox vial is accounted for. There are a thousand better things you could be doing with your money.

>> No.54023193

They only have $128B in insurance. Literally half of SIVB's balance sheet that's supposed to cover the entire country.

>> No.54023197

Jesuuuus yeah for sure. Will Ferrell aged like milk as we grew up. His "i am a giant retard with no self-awareness" schtick is funny the first few times but it's just paitful to watch as an adult

Step Bros and The Other Guys were honestly pretty good Will Ferrell movies but I tried watching Anchorman earlier this year and I couldn't make it past 20 mins

>> No.54023203
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>> No.54023206

To turn 200 into 20,000 you start with 100,000 and try 50 times, and publish a video about the one that worked.

>> No.54023211

I got 10% of my portfolio in JPM. This is the most Jewish bank in the world. Don't bet against it.

>> No.54023213

wtf you talking about recession started last year

>> No.54023231

I remember being in college and constantly quoting anchorman. It was so cringe. I was such a little faggot back then.

>> No.54023233

that's what the NBER said in Dec. 2008 as well lol

>> No.54023235

He's most likely tugging on your dick (making a joke in the gay community)

>> No.54023249

well because I'm a bagholder and thought I could hold it for many years if I had to

>> No.54023252

Fuck these faggy tech startups

>> No.54023256
File: 1.33 MB, 740x761, 1635546778352.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>Go to bank
>no monee for you

>set up auto deposits on credit card before the bank can even process the money
>Hey Credit Card I need monee
>Sure thing pal!

Sorry guys I haven't kept money in a bank account for years now it all goes to my card or my stocks. I heard that guy over there keeps $250,001 in his account though.

>> No.54023258
File: 2.89 MB, 4032x3024, C6D4B694-5355-4B29-8495-7529D15F48E7.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>Sara was giving her banker a blowjob before going on air to get her money out
>It’s over!

>> No.54023259

Why are there suddenly so many capital S Socialists running around in Silicon Valley VC circles today. I could have sworn not just a week ago it wasn't like this

>> No.54023265

Sure, but it's an insurance program, right? They'd (again, ideal world) have been hiking premiums to go alongside that kind of thing.

Also I'll laugh my ass off if they do a pseudo bail-in with a modern twist. Gamify those startups' accounts so they only get 0.5% of their money unlocked every month as SVB's MBS's get paid off.

>> No.54023278

I love that tech trannies get nervous. They got so cocky since 2020. It's truly a blessing.

>> No.54023281

The fuck are you talking about? Where do you think socialists come from anon? (It's all SV, always has been).

>> No.54023282

Lehamn Bros was literally named after two Jews tho

>> No.54023298
File: 380 KB, 583x420, miko64.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>reach out to your congressman
Pppfffffffttttt hahahahahahahaha!!!!!
Who the fuck do these faggots think the congressman work for?

>> No.54023306

it was bumped from 100k to 250k around the last crisis, but the whole thing itself is a joke, it can only cover a small bank collapse. it's more of a comfort blanket, economic meltdown your fucked and a complete distribution would be less than $1000 per American.

>> No.54023307

Based Thiel just told his guys to GTFO like yesterday or this morning. All these whining baggies are ZIRP diversity hires.

>> No.54023325
File: 2.93 MB, 4032x3024, BC3EAF94-F1F3-4D2B-A07B-62C13F82CB07.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

Oops here’s the better angle

>> No.54023327

>$1000 per American.

A more equitable future for us all.

>> No.54023342

We went from “How will Generative AI transform your business?” to “Will you be able to make payroll on March 15th?” real quick

>> No.54023343

buy the close sell the open

>> No.54023346

Tech trannies with SVB are 100% getting bailed out.

>> No.54023352

Isn't it just an HPV wart?

>> No.54023355

They were not JPM tho. Not all Jews are equal

>> No.54023361
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>> No.54023374

I haven't used my debit card in years. I just use my credit card and pay off the balance as soon as its posted. There is no benefit to paying with cash or debit anymore. Credit card companies give you rewards so why use cash?

>> No.54023375

you're not retard pumping the highest volume securities in the world that much.

TLT isn't literally a bond, but it's a passively managed basket of treasury bonds that might as well be the same. you can see the ETF holdings here: https://www.ishares.com/us/products/239454/ishares-20-year-treasury-bond-etf. 20+ year treasury bonds are not going to double in the next several years unless yields go deeply negative, which is unlikely to happen because high international stockpiles of US treasury bonds.

>> No.54023376
File: 2.17 MB, 2508x3541, 104977249_p2.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

I'm a little bit disappointed over no circuits breakers BUT I also know these kind of events, if they have to worsen, do so over weekends. Let's see Monday, but if nothing, I'll be disappointed.

>> No.54023379

the wokies literally already did the work for you.
the ticker is called “SHE”

>> No.54023380
File: 97 KB, 942x728, mott_bear_vs_SIVB.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

> if only they listened

>> No.54023397

>white people with zero ambition to do anything cutting edge in the space.
Hate to be the one to break it to you, but the true reason your department is 90% street shitters is that indians are inherently racist as fuck.
Most real tech innovation is done by the whites and east asians. Then a few token jeets eventually get hired because someone needs to serve as the link to that trashy outsourcing company out in Mumbai. Eventually this role expand into a whole division because cost-cutting wins out. More shitskins get brought in. Then a few get promoted to real roles. They prioritize hiring other poo in loos. It's all downhill from there.

It's not that all whites are inherently more intelligent or capable, I'm sure you're well aware of the stats that show the top 1% of Indians migrating to the US financially outperform the bottom 50% of obese trash living in flyover states here, but it's a false comparison. If you look at the top 1% universally, it's always been whites leading across the board. Some jews too, since they like to pretend they're a separate race.
The real problem with the asian races is that you all can't understand creativity. It's just not in the culture. Most of you were born to be slaves, to follow directions. The few that made it into the US were among the best at following directions, but that's all you'll ever be able to do.

>> No.54023411

JPM is known as the status quo of banks, should i be worried?

>> No.54023412

oh my fucking god, its real. and look at the chart... holy shit, puts on monday.

quick anon, give me some more ESG/diversity scam bullshit ETFs to short...

>> No.54023413

I'm not saying it won't go up, but it'll only go up a solid 20-30%. You can't expect 2x and 3x fast with any retail bond product.

>> No.54023429

filthy black indian dog

>> No.54023433

Fair enough
The initial AI hype was the top signal apperantly

>> No.54023435
File: 281 KB, 828x1792, CB878837-A8EA-447D-9FFE-DA32FAF51AB8.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

anybody that uses Rippling for handling their payroll might have issues with the payroll going out

>> No.54023437

I very much doubt that. There is no more money to bail anyone out. I'm sure the fed will bail out the people, but they'll let the bank die and any companies associated with them. The US is genuinely in a pinch at this point

>> No.54023452

Like pottery

>> No.54023459

>I'm sure the fed will bail out the people
When did this ever happen?

>> No.54023460

hard to do with the debt ceiling circus all the treasury can do is issue more debt as debt matures. maybe with tax revenue. if it happens I would consider selling my bond ETF, something to watch out for. Treasury is sitting on about 330B$, but the psychological effect could send yields back up in a hurry. And also spell disaster for the government's ability to finance itself without a lifting of the debt ceiling.

>> No.54023461

>just some delays

>> No.54023466
File: 300 KB, 765x485, 166673466341931.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>their money is not going anywhere
It's not going anywhere all right

>> No.54023467
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>> No.54023470


>> No.54023473

Monday is usually Crash day. On Friday people are more willing to say "I'll wait to make a move on Monday if things get worse."

Here have a comfy Peter Lynch video where he covers this exact situation.

>> No.54023480

I accidentally sold to open a $90 SBNY put to open for 3/17. I’m going to be sick

>> No.54023485

Thanks, I was wondering why I saw someone from my company mention there was an issue with them today on Slack. Luckily I get paid on Thursdays instead of Fridays.

>> No.54023489
File: 137 KB, 1167x567, TGA.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

Forgot pic

>> No.54023494

People literally never get bailed, only the banks and big corps do.

>> No.54023495

As a person who works in IT software agency all I can say this year will be awful for SaaS platforms. They will lose lots of business from the lack of new startups. Companies like Snowflake have basically 0 chance of becoming profitable now.
We already seen huge reduction in signed contracts last year. On top of that it took much longer to sign a contract (on average 300% longer). IT dream in USA is literally dead and I'm most likely to lose my well paying job soon.

>> No.54023506

can i still use my credit cards if there is a run on the banks

>> No.54023509

The plan is to get one of the big banks to buy out SVB's asset and give a federally backed garantee on those asset to that bank.

>> No.54023514

It's that or chimpout. The government and the fed don't realize the monster they've created.

>> No.54023518

You just can't pay your bill

>> No.54023521

yeah words failed me. I can't think on as many levels of hypocrisy as they can

>> No.54023523
File: 99 KB, 555x1200, Fq36L1kWwAkLPPa.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

Put your money in Starbucks cards! Starbucks is an empire.

>> No.54023556

The chimpout will be usefully redirected against the kulaks (whiteness).

>> No.54023558

Damn sorry anon, I’m super paranoid with ThinkorSwim since it’s always default sell puts when you want to buy

>> No.54023559

holy fuck lol

>> No.54023561

kek i've been waiting for the right crisis to max out my credit cards and not pay them back

>> No.54023566

ok, so how will people eat if money stops flowing?

>> No.54023569

Are you white? They probably docked you a dozen points for "equity" or something

>> No.54023583

This can't be real
Nope, Kanye woke up the blacks to the JQ.

>> No.54023584

kek everyone just wants a backed currency.

>> No.54023588

>Walmart brand shredded cheese purple packaging
Based, fuck local dairy, I WILL PROUDLY continue to support one of America's largest employers. You do get extra sharp cheddar, right..?

>> No.54023595

lol im glad i didnt take a SOC analyst position at newer tech company this year. my current company "asked" if i wanted to work more on the retail side managing the store and doing IT on the side. I said for 30% more and 100k in optoins, why the fuck not, considering my other option was to get laid off. They just didnt want to tell me yet.

>> No.54023601

only basedbeanmilk drinkers bank with svb
they wont do shit

>> No.54023606

I was closing my put, went to change the price. Didn’t realize it had filled so it auto selected but to open the same put. They trading desk wouldn’t help me lol, goodbye $9000

>> No.54023610

Anyone got the graph of FDIC coffers going into 2023? How much can they potentially cover?

>> No.54023614

niggers will eat each other
mormons and preppers will eat their stockpiles
homesteaders will eat what they have in the garden and can hunt

>> No.54023618

Wow good eye anon. It was shredded pepper jack though.

>> No.54023623

$128B in their insurance fund + $100B in loans. So basically nothing.

>> No.54023628

they aren't just going to let million starve to death.

>> No.54023635

>had a couple of hundred million in SVB

Hey man they are covered for the first 250k no worries

>> No.54023647
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Capital finds a way

>> No.54023668

Jesus this is way worse than 08 Fuuuuuuu

>> No.54023677

food stamps nigger

>> No.54023693

I'd rather use fucking paypal.

>> No.54023696

this is the info i was looking for last 30 minutes of close
i thought i was smart getting the idea to short cloudflare this morning but i was way too late there, too

>> No.54023700

They’re hoping to find a buyer who will match deposits 1:1 over the weekend but it will be hard to find another bank large enough to absorb them and all the banks are just waiting around for the asset sell and bid for the good parts. Goldman couldn’t even find them a buyer this morning.

>> No.54023702

Underrated as fuck.

>> No.54023751

Not sure if retarded or merely pretending.jpg

>> No.54023753

the US has a lot of runway left. Argentina defaulted on their debt in 2001, which is one of the most recent occurrences at that scale that was purely economic. At the time, their debt service ratio was 66.3% and they were paying 184.7% *real* interest. The US is at uh, 43% and around 2% real rates... huh

>> No.54023761

Reminds me of the /v/ anon who used gamestop as a bank
Can't find the screencap though

>> No.54023764

Why not? Makes more space for cheap labor.

>> No.54023800

The problem is the US just won't stop spending. Nobody wants to be the party known for cutting entitlements but that's what must be done.

>> No.54023805
File: 330 KB, 996x993, 1649055470535860.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>Fed Blackout period starting
I hope you closed your puts or at least hedged with some calls bobo. kek.

>> No.54023820


>> No.54023837
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Fuck, I forgot about FOMC

>> No.54023845
File: 66 KB, 636x286, 161014417.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

Found it

>> No.54023854
File: 2.53 MB, 498x371, serial-experiments-lain-lain.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

based nasdump down another 2% my hedge shorts were not for nothing!


>> No.54023859
File: 1.20 MB, 1521x2028, keeprollinrollinrollin.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

get this shit to 300

>> No.54023863

I know it's going to be a bloodbath because I took my profit from this week and sold 75%. It'll pump when I jump back in.

>> No.54023865

why short cloudflare? what is the source that they bank with svb?

>> No.54023879

Every government in the world routinely talks about "cutting waste" except ours. Just cut gibs to the rich faggots that don't even need SS, tell Ukraine the gibs were actually loans and cut defense too

>> No.54023894

cut welfare before cutting mildef

>> No.54023899


>> No.54023907


>> No.54023912


>> No.54023918

I'm in

>> No.54023924
File: 21 KB, 1314x97, Capture.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

INTChuds, did you listen to me last friday? Did you realize the market was going to go to extraordinary lengths to try to screw my covered calls? Did you know the stock was going to swing a whole goddamn 7% in three fucking days? I am enjoying some fried chicken with the money I saved by not capitulating, but holy shit.

Also I learned this week that apparently you can't buyback calls while they are worthless because the liquidity isn't there. The more you know.

>> No.54023932
File: 3.67 MB, 1920x1080, capitalism.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]


>> No.54023937

That's because we are consoomer the country. No matter what happens, we need to be consuming more and more each year or our entire house of cards economy comes crashing down.

>> No.54023938

what will happen in my opinion is that real interest rate rises will expose how indebted the US really is. debt can be ignored if it's 0%. if interest rates double, that's an extra 1 TRILLION dollars of mandatory spending every year.

i'm uneasy because we CAN borrow all this money. we're not in danger of imminent default, but some day or later, we're going to have to pay it down, right? we've borrowed 30 trillion dollars--that's $92,545.27 per individual in the US. you ask people to save up $92,545.27, it's going to take most of them over ten years living paycheck to paycheck.

>> No.54023939


>> No.54023943

Why would you put money somewhere without knowing how to get it back?

>> No.54023974

You are delusional.
>The two most important markets for commercially produced rabbit are retail grocery stores in metropolitan markets and high-end restaurants. Increasing imports of frozen rabbit from China are competing for grocery store and restaurant markets, and winning shelf space because of their comparatively lower price.
>Today, the interest in lower fat diets and healthy eating combined with an ongoing pursuit by chefs and foodies of novel and locally produced foods has led to a domestic resurgence in the use of rabbits for meat.

>> No.54023979
File: 1.99 MB, 298x300, axe.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]


>> No.54024014

It's as simple as, if the US doesn't pay the debt, the nation collapses. It's just a matter of when. They are playing a game of hot potato and are hoping they can dump it off to the other party right before the music stops

>> No.54024017

You're probably right, debt based economics is so shit

>> No.54024021
File: 497 KB, 1563x2048, 1665587029920043.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

what a weird way to think...
There it is.

>> No.54024074
File: 130 KB, 1032x1267, Screenshot 2022-04-15 121533.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>$92,545.27 per individual in the US
...you mean you dont pay that every year?

>> No.54024113

So many good ones, roll

>> No.54024124
File: 112 KB, 2255x1150, 1660596148096970.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]


>> No.54024131

this anon CAGs

>> No.54024138

but the thing is, they physically can pay so much more than they are now. debt service is 3% of the US GDP. they could borrow ten times as much as they are now before the nation collapses. if it took 10 years to spend 15 trillion, we have quite a bit of time before we hit ten times that--180 years at current spending levels, or 50 if we're being generous. the thought of 300 trillion dollars of debt makes me very queasy, though.

>> No.54024150
File: 35 KB, 600x482, donald_duck.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]


JPM collar bro are you in here?

>> No.54024243

>$200 into $20,000 on 0dte options

There needs to be massive intraday price movements on the underlying. These rarely happen.

>> No.54024302
File: 2.23 MB, 3360x4982, pass_it_on.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

no way a gap up of .5% and a close of -.5% is 1% top to bottom, buying an out of the money 0dte put even .2 delta on a 1% move on spx is 200-20k if you can repeat it twice a week

>> No.54024313


>> No.54024363

because what type of business has contracts with them? and what kind of businesses just lost access to all their funds?

>> No.54024783

so does roku and it's didn't even get -1% today

>> No.54025285

>average American
>chefs and foodies of novel and locally produced foods

>> No.54025718
File: 61 KB, 1200x630, ilaughatyouandyours.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>back then

>> No.54026765

i fucking hate bobos

/pol/tier hapooner brain retards. Fuck all of them.

>> No.54027290
File: 136 KB, 448x398, 1636717726448.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

Kek AMZN baggies trying to keep price above $90 for as long as possible. Sorry guys, its gonna dump to $70~ by the end of March;



>> No.54027343
File: 352 KB, 1232x868, FoO2BDKWIAIfK7k.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>America's 4 top banks - JPMorgan, $JPM, Bank of America, $BAC, Wells Fargo, $WFC, and Morgan Stanley, $MS - had $55 billion wiped off their market value in a single day on Thursday, per BI


>> No.54027344

What's your argument then genius?


>> No.54027399

>no way a gap up of .5% and a close of -.5% is 1% top to bottom, buying an out of the money 0dte put even .2 delta on a 1% move on spx is 200-20k if you can repeat it twice a week

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