Interview thread

[Anonymous No.53973209]

ITT: discuss interview techniques, share tips and stories.

Tell us, Mr. Anon, where do you see this thread in 5 years? And I see you've applied for a janitor position, what would you like your starting salary to be?

[Anonymous No.53973260]

>>53973209
job interviews are like a dance, you never answer what is being asked of you as if it were at face value. if you're not able to identify how the interviewer is leading you and how you should respond to show you are switched on and aware of the dance, you're done.

once aware, and once you start to see the interviewer is aware, you can lay down some line which will leave your impression. something like "i hope you can see by my resume that I make the most of opportunities which pass my way, and I plan to do the same in this position"

then rape the interviewer on the desk

[Anonymous No.53973401]

>>53973260
More pls. (I'm going to wagecuck this year.)

[Anonymous No.53973403]

What was your worst interview, brehs? And did you get the job

[Anonymous No.53973477]

>>53973403
never failed an interview in a formal setting (casual coffee interviews are shit, put me in a suit and lets sit somewhere fucking quiet thanks)
>>53973401
appear relaxed even if you aren't. accept water when offered water/coffee, make sure you're caffeinated before the interview so you dont want another coffee.

research the company and the interviewers a shit load. use an incognito browser and look at their linkedin so they cant see you've been looking. look up the size of the firm, date it was created, what they do.

make sure you know as much of what the role will entail before the interview and come prepared. if you have work similar to what you're expecting the job to require, bring it along and show them there.

be humble. dont talk about pay until after the interview unless they bring it up, then give only a ballpark

[Anonymous No.53973508]

>>53973209
i checked the interviewing process from mckikey because I got to do the SOLVE game. i purchased a cheat excel and solved the game. didn't got to the next level though.

next level would be:
learn 12 stories (lies) about situations in your resume and tell the lies.

next level after this:
do shitty excel math in your brain and solve a case in a high pressure situation.

in the process of preparing for the next 2 steps I lost interest in joining them because of the lies and mental math stupidity. I hold a fucking masters of science and they want me to jump through a burning hoop.

[Anonymous No.53973536]

>>53973260
>then rape the interviewer on the desk
Mr. Anon, this is highly, uh... inappropriate! Mr. Anon, you must stop!

[Anonymous No.53973539]

>>53973508
>the SOLVE game
the what now?

[Anonymous No.53973543]

>>53973508
you have an ego problem that is completely unwarranted. masters of science... not exactly a phd is it? if you're not even willing to do mental math to earn your job (sounds like you couldnt even manage that KEK) then you're not going to do any work at your job are you.

you sound like an incel and a fake. you will always be weeded out. newsflash: 4 years of study after highschool is nothing, all of your interviewers and bosses will have done twice that if not more over their career. you are not special

[Anonymous No.53973544]

>>53973477
Thank you. By ballpark you mean "I'm ready for the baseline/minimum pay for the job"?

[Anonymous No.53973547]

>>53973539
https://mconsultingprep.com/mckinsey-problem-solving-game-digital-assessment

[Anonymous No.53973569]

>>53973508
>>53973539
they have a shitty game which should judge if you have problem solving and linear thinking abilities.

btw was happy after seeing picrel a couple of days after the rejection. funny part is they will block you 12-18 months after 1 rejection.

[Anonymous No.53973572]

>>53973544
wait until they come back to you after the interview and ask for the average salary for that position (research the exact figure) if you really want your foot in the door. they have a number they're expecting you to ask for

[Anonymous No.53973587]

>>53973569
HAhahahhah you thought a masters of science somehow guaranteed you a position at Mckinsey. you really are a sad faggot

[Anonymous No.53973607]

>>53973543
kek, I have 0 ego since my early 20 / PUA days in uni. I don't know where you study 4 years for a masters but in Germany you do 3 years for a bachelor and 2 years for a masters. good thing that I'm self-employed since I went to university. just wanted to widen my horizon and work in a real company. but I must've striked a nerve from you, are you a kike by any chance?

[Anonymous No.53973630]

>>53973587
>HAhahahhah you thought a masters of science somehow guaranteed you a position at Mckinsey
you post 2x the face about the masters. now I get it, YOU have the ego problem here. kekd, checked and get rekt.

[Anonymous No.53973671]

>>53973403
This happened almost 2 decades ago:

>be 16
>mom has been pestering me to get a part time job
>friend tells me about an upcoming interview he's got with a sales company, asks me if I want to come with him to the interview because they encourage you to bring friends
>since I have no idea how the real world works and what employment at a real job entails, I'm ecstatic and of course accept
>tell my mom I'm interviewing for a sales position, get all excited, wear the suit my parents bought for me for a wedding 2 years ago, a bit small now but whatever, gotta look good for my interview
>day of the interview comes, I go to pick up my friend and we drive there; it's a gigantic office building, holy shit im so nervous, it's fucking happening you guys
>get inside and it's a big conference auditorium with seating for a hundred people
>there's a shit load of people here, most of them are young, pimply faced teenagers like me, I recognize a bunch of people from school
>me and my friend are literally the only people who dressed up, everyone else is wearing street clothes; one guy is wearing a dirty wife beater with a bunch of disgusting stains
>instead of this being a huge red flag for us, we turn to each other and say "holy shit look at this dogshit competition, we got this easy"
>sit through a 5 hour long presentation with various rotating speakers, turns out the job is selling cutco knives door to door

[Anonymous No.53973689]

>>53973671
>after the presentation, there's individual 1 on 1 interviews, fuck yeah now's my time to shine
>the fat boomer who interviews me acts super serious, his office is tiny and his desk is way too small for him and all his stupid knickknacks and framed pictures of his ugly family
>asks me about my pervious experience, "where do you see yourself in 10 years", "what's a tough challenge you've had to overcome in your life", like actual interview questions.
>uh dude I'm a 16 year old living in one of the most affluent suburbs in America; I don't have any experience or challenges in my life, in fact my mom wanted me to get a job so I could have some experience
>he makes a big show out of offering me a "job" (hmmm idk if you're the right fit, hmmm we've got a lot of other qualified candidates, hmmm idk if you've got enough experience, but ok kid I like your style you're hired!)
>exit the interview back into the auditorium and the room is still virtually full; looks like everyone who showed up "got the job", including stained wife beater guy
>now that interviews are over and we're all hired, it's time for more presentations; apparently there's like 6 more hours of this
>look to my friend and he looks back at me, yeah this shit ain't happening, we get up and leave
>get a bunch of calls from cutco the next day admonishing me for walking out: "this will go on your permanent record!" and a bunch of other shit
>"but uh, when can we schedule you in so you can finish part 2 of the seminar? You need to have that done before we move on to the next part"
>hang up on him and block the number

[Anonymous No.53973890]

>>53973689
>he makes a big show out of offering me a "job" (hmmm idk if you're the right fit, hmmm we've got a lot of other qualified candidates, hmmm idk if you've got enough experience, but ok kid I like your style you're hired!)
the bitch said something similar to me and I thought why the fuck would you tell me that if I got the job anyways

once they gave me all the info in a book of printouts I saw it was a pyramid scheme and tossed the printouts

[Anonymous No.53975960]

I'm a recruiter and will give you serious advice if you ask serious questions.
I probably filter 100 of you retards per day, so don't waste my time off as well as my time on the clock.
I'll be back in approx 1 hour. If the thread is up I will deep dive into any questions you have.

[Anonymous No.53976568]

>>53975960
I work for a massive globohomo company. Everyone of u recruiter retards is either a shitskin 2nd generation american pajeet with a faggot tiktok haircut, or a retarded post wall roastie. Youre probably the shitskin breed, in which case no one gives a fuck what u have to say. Go back to posting about how much you live hybrid work on linkedin faggot

[Anonymous No.53976680]

>>53975960
I hope you get laid off

[Anonymous No.53976718]

>>53973403
and interview at a University, I walk in the door like 5 or 6 people are on the other side of the table. These people must have absolutely nothing to do is what I was thinking. You need that many people just to interview a fucking graphic designer? It took forever, it was awful, I lost my voice answering all their bullshit questions and there was no water. By the end of it I didn't give a shit anymore.

[Anonymous No.53976827]

I remember interviewing for a job at a place once and there were three fucking HR roasties hosting the inteview. They were wearing what basically amounted to pajamas in the work place and had that really smug, smarmy entitlement that only came with being the confirmed, unrivalled henmothers of their particular dens. I recall the stench immediately when I was welcomed into the small side-room that they took my interview in. Like stale fish oil supplements. They were a little younger than me, and if I'm honest quite attractive, although each had clearly allowed herself to fall lax in her body in some manner, since they were established at work and it was evident by their mannerisms and some of the small talk that they were all single.

I could not fucking focus a single bit during the interview. I hardly answered any questions like a normal person might, and I maintained eye contact way too long as an attempt to eye-rape these women like a disarming tactic. All I could think about was locking that shitty door behind me and taking my right as a conqueror out on all three of them. The chubbier redhead might've been able to throw a punch, I could tell from her accent she was from a rougher strata than the brunette or bottle blonde, but ultimately I was the predator in that room. My mind was nothing but a hot mess of pornographic violence, culminating in a tyrannosaur-like screaming that would come from my gullet as my engorged member exploded deep inside each of them.

I never heard back from them and whenever I smell fish oil I get an erection.

[Anonymous No.53976844]

>>53973403

>be me
>interview for position
>had interviews before so i thought i was prepared and comfortable
>did research on company, and the person interviewing me
>its a large office, its one on one
>Notice a second seat next to the guy who is interviewing me, didn't really think about it much
>interview is going fucking amazing
>almost near the end, the dude seems really excited to have me in the room
>Door swings open, and slams shut (like, in a pissed off way)
>Some fucking late 30s roastie comes walking in
>Takes a seat
>She is fucking late to this interview
>Despite my research i have no idea who this bitch is
>Giving off bitchy attitude the entire time
>Blames the other guy for not telling her the time for the candidate interview
>Dude tried saving me by going "Oh i'm already done he's...."
>Bitch wants to interview me
>Hits me with curve ball retard questions
>Like, emotional level women astrology kinda level bullshit
>all feely bullshit kinda women questions
>What if what what if
>fumble her questions which were extremely irrelevant
>"You're not the right fit for this team, sorry"
>Leaves the room
>The other guy leaves the room to talk with her
>Hear yelling for about 5 minutes
>Something about bitch roastie and its "Not her team or department" even though their teams work with eachother sometimes
>Comes back
>The other guy cucks out and im not considered

was shitty day.

[Anonymous No.53978156]

>>53973539
They make you jump through a series of shitty hoops

[Anonymous No.53978600]

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[Anonymous No.53979086]

>>53973689
>>53973671
>Medstar

[Anonymous No.53979119]

>>53978156
which would be fine for an early 20 year old willing to do anything but I'm in my early 30s now. surprised the thread is still open.

[Anonymous No.53979195]

>>53973403
Years ago, I had a phone interview for a salesman position. It would have been fine, but at that time I was working at clubs until 2 in the morning most days, and I had gotten used to that sleep schedule. For some reason, this interview was at 7 in the morning, and so when I did it, I was like a zombie and had like no energy. Failed it and didn't get the job obviously, but I went back to bed and slept more afterwards

[Anonymous No.53979253]

>be me
>have great job
>have amazing skillet
>put out some feelers because why not
>get a couple phone calls immediately
>go to interview
>asks for me to tell them about my experience
>tell them what I do at my current job, and am obviously way more experienced than they ever thought was imaginable (I work in a weird field)
>"anon, tell us why you would be a good fit here"
>lol bitch, I already have a great job...you tell ME why I should consider working here
>proceed to grill them
>obviously uncomfortable and grossly unprepared for this scenario
>tell them thanks for their time, but I don't think this is a good fit for me
>they are visibly confused as to what just happened
The company called me once a week for three months after about this fucking job