I need your help /biz/

[Anonymous No.53105755]

>be stinky neet
>decide to finally get a job
>lie through my teeth and get decent office job
>am fortunate to not have social anxiety so I manage to get hired
>instantly realize people in office jobs are all degenerates
>most of them are fucking furries
>people start to get laid off or quit on their own
>get promoted to a junior analyst position without asking
>Manager and supervisor constantly takes days off or is WFH
>get tasked to manage office
>everyone is a lazy nigger
>they're constantly going off on break, looking at Facebook, or gossiping
>have to constantly be monitoring everyone else and keep them busy
>some of them are defiant and will argue with you
>have to pretend to be their friend and let them know of some upcoming evaluation and that I'm just looking out for them
>Realize I'm literally babysitting these full grown men

How do I keep this up? Any advice in keeping the wagey cattle in check?

[Anonymous No.53105784]

>is a wagey
>thinks of others as wagey cattle
you're worse than them. At least they're trying to skip work while you're doing your job + your boss's for free lol. Lmao even.

[Anonymous No.53105799]

>>53105784
I'd agree with you but I'm just trying to gather the experience so I can start my own company

[Anonymous No.53105834]

>>53105755
You either:
>get along with them and mind your business
>become lazy like them
>start a war over their lazy faggot ass

[Anonymous No.53105868]

>>53105755
>Any advice in keeping the wagey cattle in check?
Are you retarded? From what your wrote they are handing you control - take control and run the business. Promote up, get rid of the losers, hire winners, build the company, get rich, rule the world. Stop feeling sorry for yourself and take advantage of the opportunity.

[Anonymous No.53105919]

>>53105755
I just realised these office jobs are kinda like kindergarten for grown ups. I work as tech supp (cloud services), my managers have asked me questions that I am like questioning if this is a joke or for real. Stuff that seems basic to me is something highly complex for others, like I am about to be promoted but I see how much shit this is. The only way out is to either become devops, which means working and studying 2 more months or making an SMMA business. I thought an office job will be the answer to my humble few years in bed factory, car washes, furniture delivery and hotel staff. Like this matrix shit is for real, if you are not an NPC then you are doomed. I think I will be promoted to some position that I initially thought will be cool but later realised it will be shit.

[Anonymous No.53105921]

>>53105868
I have zero control. I tried getting one of the wageys fired but the manager just jerked me around.

[Anonymous No.53105923]

>>53105755
Work scrum, let them report daily if they finished their work or not (stand-up). Do sessions with the team where you evaluate performance as a team. Let them come with ideas how to perform better. Are people talking shit plan a meting with your supervisor and them. Give your super visor a heads-up so that he will side with you. You always need to be better then them. Work harder, know more, be better connected within the company. No one will like you, you will be on your own, you have to see it as a personal battle with a mask of a friendly face.


>>53105784
OP is being groomed for a leadership position. They trow you in the fire (for free) if he get out they will put him in some leadership traineeship.

[Anonymous No.53105924]

>>53105755
>be stinky neet
>decide to finally get a job
>get promoted to a junior analyst position without asking
How tf u do that? I fail on step no.1
Regarding your question, The art of war (with commentaries) and you should also visit your local library for managment books.

[Anonymous No.53106035]

>>53105923
My current approach is actually similar to this but because I'm lower ranking I'm kinda blending with them by pretending to be their friend and trying to look out for them. The problem is that they've become too comfortable so they don't have to worry about doing anything. I introduced some fake upcoming "evaluation" and spoke to them individually how they've already fired people before for their lack of numbers. There's only one nigger on here who legit still fights me against everything and I suspect he actually wants to get fired especially by his constant tardiness. I noticed appealing to his ego helps him work more

[Anonymous No.53106040]

>>53105755
how well would a business function if it only hired INTJ's and non-npcs?

I'm hiring a ton of people for an IT company - I only hire autists that are redpilled. I've been given shit for not hiring trannies and niggers but I still have time before I have to give in.

[Anonymous No.53106045]

>>53105755
Hahahahaha fucking wagie

[Anonymous No.53106054]

>>53105924
I just spammed applications until I got a few calls. Before this I was working at some shitty warehouse getting nearly killed everyday.

[Anonymous No.53106086]

>>53106040
You still need extroverts for sales to normie companies.

[Anonymous No.53106131]

>>53106040
Shit larp

[Anonymous No.53106248]

> nonsense jew demoralization logic
this is a board of happiness and success. kindly fuck off thanks

[Anonymous No.53106360]

>>53106035
Corporate sociopath anon here. I unironically respect your effort so far. You have climbed high enough to be offered supervisory roles already. Just keep at it and your pay will match your responsibility soon (I assume they don’t currently based on what you have said already).
Just remember that you need to think view every interaction you have as transactional. Ask yourself “what benefit am I getting from this conversation and/or relationship”. Like another anon already mentioned, you should be trying to fire the losers so talking with suspects is tolerable if you think it is going to give you ammunition to get them fired. Never fall for sob stories as humans are conditioned to lie and appease ro sympathy when they get called out. Likewise people that show potential should be managed accordingly.
A good idea is to make a cheat sheet for how to manage your role and the office based on everything you have learned so far and then take it your managers for review. This is a good way to demonstrate your commitment but also make their lives easier as they know they can promote you with the understanding you have the skills and document to help train someone to fill your role below. Always drop buzzzwords like “productivity” and “efficiency” when talking to your superiors about ideas for improvements as it promotes a sense that your idea (even firing plebs) will genuinely improve the workplace and hopefully increase profits. Also it goes without saying you shouldn’t shit where you eat, so having a work waifu is tolerable, it should stay at flirty banter but nothing further as even if you are flying high in your position, one bad HR complaint from a jilted lover will mean you flew to close to the sun.
Best of luck anon, you have achieved more than 90% of the neet anons that post on this Cambodian jellyfish needling board

[Anonymous No.53106525]

>>53105755

Now you understand why America is crumbling. The corrupt, psychopathic, retarded politicians are just a representation of the average American. Degenerate, lazy and stupid.

[Anonymous No.53106654]

Wagie office life is literal hell. Look at these midwits scheming to backstab and manipulate coworkers to get thrown a couple more peanuts each month. And the end result is still a company with 90% dead weight.

[Anonymous No.53106875]

>>53106054
Were you just blatantly making the shit up or exaggerating and bluffing on job applications?
Just reminded me of my job in warehouse I was doing as studnent and now neeting cuz it killed my back. It was actually similar setting like your scenario: cool boss, meme job, can actually be on phone whole day while working, chat with other retards, take breaks whenever. Only about 20% or less people did the most work there, I guess this happens when people don't have a sense of duty or the work they do isn't personal or has no valur to them. Maybe you should try to discipline them and make them respect you so they look out *for you* instead of you babysitting them. Maybe the job is actually a meme so making up some project that has value or actually means something to them would benefit. This is similar like the rebellion of Ceasar's 10th legion: idle soldiers rebel because they lost their duty and source of their pride.

[Anonymous No.53106915]

>>53105755
Take your paycheck and go home. Praise Jesus. Glorify God.

[Anonymous No.53107046]

>>53105755
>these are the lazy low intellect degenerates who hate on based NEETs
The post modern world was a big mistake and everyone who has been pushing this retardation and is still alive needs to swallow the beheading pill.

[Anonymous No.53107533]

>>53106360
I appreciate this anon as it was an informative post. I will create a cheat sheet and look at what works. I have one trouble maker who constantly calls off, does zero work, and literally sleeps at his desk. I've tried getting him fired but the supervisor seems to have a soft spot for him for whatever reason even though others have complained about him too

[Anonymous No.53107571]

>>53106875
Yes, I but I will say it was luck because I managed to enter the zone for that particular job interview. I also had a gf who worked in a similar job who helped me know specific keywords to attract the employers. All in all it was a mix between sounding confident, using the right terminology, and overall luck

[Anonymous No.53107587]

>>53107046
Why do you insist I hate you? I don't think or care about your poverty ridden life at all.