Hypothetical Financial Situation

[Anonymous No.52948532]

>Be you
>Wake up tomorrow
>Your consciousness has been shifted into the body of Tyrone Trayvon-Watermelonius Johnson
>Just turned 18
>Only child
>Live in your mama's house in a vibrant and diverse Detroit neighborhood
>You are in your senior year of high school, and have so far managed to squeak by with a 2.0 GPA
>Your current assets are $600 you made from flipping ounces, and a 2001 Saturn S-Series (say it's worth around $2,000)
>Other than that, you have two lightly used $150 pairs of Jordans, a $250 Television, a $500 laptop, and a $200 Hi-Point C9 to your name
>No current job
>Mama is currently working 3 jobs to pay all your living expenses, but is threatening to kick your black ass out soon
>You have a juvenile record of misdemeanor drug and assault-related offenses, but have a clean record since turning 18
>You are not actively involved with a gang, but have plenty of homies who are
>Your homies can hook you up with drugs to flip or stolen goods they lifted from trains passing through Detroit
>You can engage in crimes, but keep it realistic since you can still be arrested and make things harder for yourself with an adult record
>Suicide is not an option
You resolve to get yourself out of this situation. You don't necessarily have to "make it," but at least get yourself (and your mama if you chose) out of your shitty Detroit hood into a safer neighborhood with stable finances. What do?

[Anonymous No.52948550]

>>52948532
get a full ride negroe scholarship to a local college. graduate with a 1.7 GPA in (non-STEM degree.) get a $60k/year diversity hire email job. refrain from KEEPIN IT REAL™.

[Anonymous No.52948592]

>>52948550
$60k sounds racist. Better double that.

[Anonymous No.52948595]

>>52948532
i would probably try to get as many women pregnant as possible before disappearing, then years later i would make contact with any of the kids if they had made it

[Anonymous No.52949554]

>>52948532
Hahaha Tyrone Isekai.
Alright, I'll bite.

>First things first figure out if the conciousness transferred the mother tongue of white english over. Can I speak Ebonics? If not, better start learning fast or my own "mother" is going to be incomprehensible. Can I speak white person talk? If not, better get watching some white person media and reminding myself how english is properly spoken.
>With communication down, the next step is to get out of the ghetto utilising White Guilt™.
>Proceed to write up a document dramatising my "life" "experiences", dripping with the kind of institutionalised racism most college liberals have wet dreams about. Emphasise the plight, nay, the struggle, of an intelligent young black in a world that demands he fail. Send the essay out to universities (diversity and inclusion depts, etc) and maybe polygon as a "my story" type thing. If at least a couple of the universities don't bite, I'd be extremely surprised.
>Sell the TV and one of the sets of jordans, along with the weapon. Use this money to buy a cheap suit, (not polyester, but mixed is fine), and get it fitted (a fitted cheap suit will always look better than an off the rack expensive one.) and wear it to the skype/teams meeting/interview, whatever.
>Get into the best university possible whilst spending the least amount of money. Scholarships are probably available. Talk to any resources at the given university to help me get that scholarship. What's critical is getting a biochem or medical degree pre-grad catchup for a year or two and then barrelling right into being a medical researcher specialised in neurosurgery.
>Don't look for a free ride as far as the actual studying goes. Pour my heart and soul into the work. Really do everything I can to become the best neurosurgeon possible.
>Toil and get to the forefront of the study. Really push the boundaries.
>So that I can get my brain out of this fucking nigger and into a white person body.

[Anonymous No.52949640]

>>52948532
Poison mother to death, inherit house, take out second mortgage for repairs, open Robin Hood brokerage account ,use mortgage money to write SPY calls.

[Anonymous No.52949680]

Mom, pack your shit we are moving to Montana. Yes I know there are very fews niggers there, thats the point.
Its that easy

[Anonymous No.52949699]

>>52948532
Join the Navy or Air Force in a technical rate to learn actual working skills, do your 4 years then use the GI bill to get a degree or just move straight to a technician role with the water company/gas company of a white neighborhood because they NEED to fill their diversity hires. Ezmode.

[Anonymous No.52949723]

>>52948532
>>Just turned 18
>>You have a juvenile record of misdemeanor drug and assault-related offenses, but have a clean record since turning 18

sounds about right

[Anonymous No.52949750]

>>52948532
Simple.
Using my own current brain I'd write a 200-300 page book about my "experiences" as an underprivileged yute. Sprinkle in a couple quotes from Maya Angelou towards the end. Do a TED Talk. Get a $2.1million deal from Netflix. Happy ending. Bonus points if one of my friends or family gets shot by the police while "doing nothing" and I can sell shirts with their name written on it in indecipherable calligraphy and tie dye angel wings.

[Anonymous No.52949757]

>>52948550
1.7 GPA????
With his background, he should could transfer to harvard (or at least brown or Princeton) with that GPA. That gets him a 200k email job