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/biz/ - Business & Finance

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5233056 No.5233056 [Reply] [Original]

>known about crypto since sophomore in high school
>put all my birthday money towards building a small GPU mining rig
>parents treat it like video games, show their visible disdain for my hobby
>senior year
>read about Ethereum project coming out
>start mining the coins with my rig
>mine about 700 coins over the course of 6 months
>just hodl them in my wallet, eventually move on to mess around with other coins
>Ethereum starts making mainstream news
>Excited but not scrambling to sell, know the wallet is on one of my old laptops at my parents' house
>parents put the laptop in a safe, won't give it to me because "we paid for it with our hard earned money"
>realize they know the Ethereum is on there and they want to steal it from me
I'm not fucking around, do I have a case here? They can't just argue "he used hardware and electricity that we paid for" and keep the coins from me, can they?

>> No.5233090

>>5233056
just give them half

>> No.5233131

>>5233056
Interesting. I would consider this stealing, tell them you just have something irrelevant to recover like photos or something else. If they don't hand it to you even in this case it's because they know there is ethereum on there and they want to steal from you. IF they DO, fuck them over in one way or another, you can't allow them to take it.

>> No.5233147

>>5233056
Take it back. With violence, if necessary. Or even better, go full friendly, talk with them about crypto, help them, and then sell everything to your wallet. There is like a million ways, op.

Good luck.

>> No.5233200
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5233200

>>5233056
damn, buy low get robbed works too I guess

>> No.5233205

take what is yours or live on your knees for eternity

>> No.5233212

>>5233090
I probably would have insisted they take a portion of the sale if they had supported by budding interests as a kid and didn't literally steal my shit when they realized I was right all along. Not now. Fuck them. I'm not giving them SHIT. I would rather destroy the wallet than give them a single Ether now.

>> No.5233233

>>5233147
This could work too. IF your relationship with your family is shit, convince them that you will give them some part of the cash in return, obviously you wouldn't do it.
The other option is to fake a hack or something like that.

>> No.5233269

>>5233056
Do they know the first single fuckin thing about crypto? You could just outright bamboozle them, say you'll get them in on it then send it all to an exchange and turn it into monero. Even if they lawyer up it's impossible to track.

>> No.5233307

or simply thank them for the loan and the support (through gritted teeth) and say you'll pay them back double their initial USD investment.

>> No.5233315

Just tell them what it's worth now??

>> No.5233320

It's theirs stupid.

>> No.5233324

>>5233056
Kill them. It's the only way.

>> No.5233334
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5233334

buy a gun and threaten them with it

>> No.5233336

>>5233056
Your parents sound like cunts.

>> No.5233341

>>5233056
If your parents were that obtuse about it I would kill them and get new parents.

>> No.5233348

>>5233056
They steal from you, you steal it back from them.

>> No.5233352

>>5233056
Assuming you aren't larping.

Literally steal the safe, a half a million is worth breaking your toxic family bonds.

Try to find a lawyer or something. Throw twice the equivalent money they apparently paid for in their face, if they refuse to give it back, congrats you're parents are trying to steal your 1/2 mill.

>> No.5233367

>>5233131
I'm scared the same thing will happen to me. Why do people try to fuck you just when things are getting good for you?

>> No.5233372

>>5233056
Your parents are shitty fucking people. Tell them you will buy the laptop from them.

They don't know the first fucking thing about Crypto and if they tried to get someone to sell ti for them they would steal it.

>> No.5233374
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5233374

>>5233056

>> No.5233381
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5233381

>>5233056
Become a crafty merchant and outwit them. Think of this like Morrowind where you have to negotiate with the Kajit traders.

>> No.5233386

>>5233056
since you're not mentioning your country I'm going to assume the USA and I can't tell you I'm not an american lawyer. but in belgium (I was told in school) it's impossible for direct family members to steal from each other.
that's heartbreaking anon I'm hoping your parents have been shit all your life so it didn't hit you too hard that they would do that to you
did you mention how much ethereum is on there. do they know how much it is?
maybe you can drop a line like "ok I'll pay for the laptop and the electricity then those few thousand dollars should make up for it and you're right you fed me all my life, gave me a laptop & the electricity. I just didn't want to pay for it at first because you didn't seem to approve or understand of what I was actually doing"

>> No.5233393

You don't have the private key anywhere else? Is the wallet secure where they can't get it unless you tell them the password or private key?

>> No.5233399

>>5233056
What the actual fuck
Do you have money to buy the computer? How much can it be worth nowadays? 200/300bucks?
Your parents are dicks dude, good luck

>> No.5233429

>>5233315
no
no
NO

Fucking hell don't do this.

>> No.5233432

>>5233352
The problem with this is if you get a lawyer they will just destroy the laptop. Based on how shitty they sound.

They are trying to steal your money and they don't even know how it functions. This is really a kill them situation.

>> No.5233438

>>5233056
Steal it and lawyer up.

>> No.5233446

>>5233212
M8, just say you'll give them half. Once you have the laptop, do everything to send them over half, but don't actually do it (this is to check whether they took out your HDD or something fishy like that). Once you see that you have your ether, run out of that house and never look back. And tell them that they can go fuck themselves and their entitled boomer asses, and that you won't visit them when they're in the hospital because they are legitimately shitty human beings.

This is the worst of the worse - when they tell you you'll fail but once you succeed they act like they have any legitimacy to your earnings. Fuck them, man. You don't need them in your life. But you need that ether.

>> No.5233450

>>5233056
You have very shit parents. You probably deserve it

>> No.5233470

>>5233336
I never realized they were this big of cunts. I kind of understood the typical boomer mentality towards their dweeby kid's hobbies that they didn't understand. But never in my life would I have expected they would straight up steal from me, I was the kind of kid who never even fathomed of taking anything from my parents without their permission. I even asked them if it was okay to set up my mining rig in the basement way back when, which they begrudgingly agreed to.

>> No.5233497

>>5233056

>Hey guys the laptop is worth a lotta money but only I can access it

Boom.

>> No.5233508

>>5233381
This. Levels in bartering, speechcraft and illusion is in order, OP.

>> No.5233509

>>5233470
I agree with >>5233446

Say whatever you can to get the laptop from them. Say you don't know how much is on the computer but you think it's like 5 or 10 ETH and you will give them half.

Then fucking book it out of there once you have the laptop. Fuck Boomers. Scum of the goddamned Earth.

>> No.5233513

fake your own kidnapping, call them asking for ransom, and when they say they have no money tell them you take crypto too, then tell them you're not playing and switch the fake voice to your real voice screaming in pain (you can paper cut yourself to make it sound believable).

Just ask them to drop the pc at some bridge inside a bag, be alone, don't call the cops, don't look back. Send them a small gift afterwards, and iphone or something.

>> No.5233551

>>5233056
tell them you got $5,000 on there and that you'll give them have. make the point that they'll never figure out how to open it without you.

>> No.5233597

I'll cut the safe open for you for 5k usd worth of eth

assuming you are in the US someplace

>> No.5233601

lmao why are you still living at home when your net worth is over 500grand, shoulda chipped some off the top and rented a place for a year the moment you had the chance

you have some shitty parents. for reference, I made 1k a few months ago on Monero and used it to pay off a student loan, told my dad about it and he bought me dinner and offered to retroactively pay for half my expenditure. if they seriously won't give it back and you're a grown ass man then call the cops.

>> No.5233626

>>5233386 here
actually yeah, fucken do this >>5233446
can you be cool anon? they must not be able to tell from your face
just go all out for the exits with that fucking laptop
fuck your parents

>> No.5233627

>>5233056

Steal it back OP. Fuck your parents, they sound like they suck. I believe in you.

Good luck brother

>> No.5233633

>>5233601
I don't live at home faggot I just got home from school for the holidays. I hope this Christmas is as miserable as possible for everyone in my family.

>> No.5233654

>>5233446
Do this, but send the ETH to a new wallet.
Tell them the wallet is for them, but just take the lot and fuck off.

>> No.5233667

>>5233601
The biggest problem again is they are likely to destroy the laptop out of spite.

It's valuable to him because he has the ability to access and use it. It's value to them is on the potential to steal it with zero consequences.

Once you get the cops involved they are more likely to simply destroy it or remove the hard drive and hide it than let him have it.

>> No.5233668

>>5233470
Some more details are necessary. Do you know where the safe is? Are your parents idiots? Is it easy to guess wheee the key is? Do they have a combination lock, are they the type to write down combination. Is it a good safe or a shit safe. Are you able to go to their house when there not home? If you are call a locksmith to meet you there just that thing open, get the laptop send the eth and put the laptop back. Seriously some details and we can help u out. Fuck boomers.

>> No.5233675

>>5233432
This is a legal issue, OP is probably a manlet that doesn't lift so he can't resort to violence and probably lacks the emotional intelligence and liquid capital to get thugs to steal it.

He's gonna have to try and do this the white person way.

Honestly I'm more worried that OP's family will torture him for the private keys, 1/2 a mill is a lot to trailer trash.

Alternatively you could try tricking them idk, but the risk level in this ploy goes up exponentially. Just give them a bunch of ethereum classic as compensation and turn your ethereum into monero so they (or someone they hire) can't track you.

But uh.. just a thought. Do you not have the 24 letter pass to recreate your wallet and then transfer your coins to a different one? Kek. Watch the boomers get BTFO.

Oh btw OP, you're supposed to be paying taxes. As a last resort if you don't try theft tip the IRS that your parents not only stole half a mill from you, but also owe the IRS 6 figures in taxes if they claim it. You have to pay your taxes anyway.

>> No.5233687

>>5233056
why would you only store your coins in one place? Sounds like larp or you're dumb

>> No.5233710
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5233710

>>5233212
Just tell them it's worth 1/4 of what it's worth unless you already messed up and told them what it's actually worth. Tell them you'll set them up on coinbase and send them money for supporting you with setting you up with the computer in the first place and keeping a roof over your head and the laptop fed with electricity. Even if you don't mean it, swallow your pride. Thats a lot of money.. they'll likely take the bait and you can send them 2 coins each for good measure and laugh when they lose it all trying to trade.

>> No.5233712

>>5233056
Your parents sound like fuckheads on levels that is unimaginable, I can't imagine your father or mother betraying you and your continued success by doing this.

Try getting in and guessing the code, If you know them well after a couple of tries you should get the password and it is possible its some stupid shit like 1-2-3-4 or a birthday

>> No.5233731

>>5233212
anon I was literally molested and beaten by my family. growing up I had some fucked up childhood I fought myself and my parents and hated the world. I was saved by the books, sport and streets. Only after I reached my 30s I realized that my family hurt me because they failed in life and did not want me to fail like they did. trust your instincts - if you think you will not make it with only half of eth and have nothing to be thankful to them tell that to them, i'm sure they'll give you your laptop and erase you from their life.

>remember anon - everything happens for a reason - everything you have or know came to you by help of people around you

>> No.5233732

>>5233212
What i would give to have half of 700 eth. Make face long enough with them and offer them a portion. Dont try to haggle your parents. Parents dont always support our decisions not out of spite but out of a lack of understanding. Don't get stuck on the 'I hate my family thing' or you'll stay resentful and lost a couple hundred g.

>> No.5233734

Would absolutely stalk them and log their daily routine, and plan a way to steal the safe. It's probably not such a badass safe that it can't be beaten/sawed into.

>> No.5233736

>>5233446
They're mad he didn't do it the way he did

>> No.5233752

>>5233626
wait

I have another idea
you can actually make your parents a wallet and send them half, just make sure you have the private key aswell so you can move it the instant you get out of the house

>> No.5233754

>>5233056
Did you offer to buy the laptop?

>> No.5233759

Okay. Here's a /biz esque plan that may have disastrous consequences.

Hire a local thug to get the safe open for you. Say you're addicted to video games or something and that's why you need it.

>> No.5233762

>>5233056
hire a locksmith, bust it out, never speak to them again

if its a moveable safe take it in your car and just leave

>> No.5233776

>>5233056
Nice larp faggot. What are they going to do without a wallet password?

>> No.5233778

Tell them you “wired” the Ethereum to another computer or some shit. They won’t know any better. Just make sure you don’t let them know that you know that they want the crypto.

>> No.5233797

>>5233776
They can destroy the laptop i guess

>> No.5233802

>>5233056
There's no way your parents could learn what crypto really means unless you told them

>> No.5233808

>>5233675
You don't have to pay taxes until you cash out brainlet

>> No.5233811

>>5233056
I will rob your parents for 50%

>> No.5233820

>>5233056
Either your parents think they're keeping it safe for you, or you have shitty parents. Sorry about that, really.

>> No.5233826

>>5233633
Everyone here who says to send them half if a fucking idiot. Look if you’re larking I don’t give a shit. Otherwise, I’ll help you solve your fucking problem. I hate shitty parents. Give some fucking details.

>> No.5233838

>>5233675
>IRS
That only works if he can prove he had the ETH and the parents destroyed the laptop.

I'm more fond of the create another address he controls the key to and send it all there.

Just bring a USB with the address in a text file and say you need it to access the ETH.

Send it straight to the new wallet and fuck off.

Unless they plan on beating him to death they can' t do anything. The Boomer is an arrogant and stupid creature. It can be tricked.

>> No.5233856

>>5233797
What would that accomplish?

>> No.5233862

>>5233808
Mining is taxed as income you twat. You've never even reported crypto on your taxes.

>> No.5233865

fake story

a person smart enough to mine and hold this early would never consider this a problem
there is like a million dollars in there, blow it out the wall if you have to

>> No.5233906

>>5233668
it's a big steel gun safe in the garage. Probably weighs a ton. literally. Combination, no key. I'm literally living in the house for the next two weeks. My mom is stay-at-home and my dad just took his two weeks for the holidays, I doubt there will be a moment where I'm allowed to be home alone to call a locksmith.
>>5233675
Is proof that they have half a million in untaxed income on the property enough for a search warrant? How do you tip the IRS? I would rather watch them get fucked on tax evasion than give them anything right now.

>> No.5233917

>>5233776
They are boomers. They don't know how Crypto works. They just know he has magic internet money on his computer and it's valuable.

They don't get how to use it. They are at the very least planning on extorting him for money. It's why they said they paid for it with their hard earned money and have it in a safe. They want him to PAY.

>> No.5233947

>>5233734
This. Bring a crowbar and go to town OP

>> No.5233950

>>5233856
Nothing i guess. But they could do that if they wanted to be dicks about it.

>> No.5233954

>>5233731
fag

>> No.5233965

>>5233906
you need to think with a cold head, there's no point in loosing it all just to fuck them over

the goal here is to get the ETH
I'm a newbie when it comes to this but can't you access the eth with the private key?
you do have the private key right?

>> No.5233969

>>5233776
My parents are clueless boomers, they probably think they can get some computer forensics guy to extract the coins even if I straight up tell them it's impossible. My dad used to think I was the one getting viruses on the family computer when I was in elementary even though I was able to fix that shit at 1/10 his age.

>> No.5234003

>>5233969
>My dad used to think I was the one getting viruses on the family computer when I was in elementary even though I was able to fix that shit at 1/10 his age.
classic

>> No.5234016

Fake thread. Op is larp.

>> No.5234017

>>5233862
It was practically worthless when he mined it and you don't have to report under 600$ in self employment taxes

>> No.5234030

>>5233906
Link your wallet address to us, I like your story but I don't want to continue further if you're larping.

I mean, all transactions are on the public block chain. Tip them off that this particular wallet you have has a desktop client on your computer which they keep locked in a fucking safe.

The IRS will likely keep them on some kind of watch list, even if they managed to get your coins (only way for them to do this is to torture you), the moment your eth gets onto an exchange the transaction will get flagged and they'll get fucked.

In the very least they wouldn't be able to cash out your ETH without paying a price and triggering chaos for your family.

This is a last resort kind of thing.

>> No.5234035

>>5233906
It's not income u dumb fuck

>> No.5234059

OP you should feed your parents some bullshit about hard-drive degradation or needing to update the software to keep your crypto, so they think it will be lost if you don't get access to it. Offer to cash it out for them for a 10% fee.

Then just transfer everything to a wallet under your control and tell them to go fuck themselves.

>> No.5234079

>>5233969
do you have the private key in plaintext on your laptop? if they take the laptop to someone who "knows" crypto and that person finds the key, both you and your parents are fucked because he's going to steal them.

>> No.5234125

>>5234079
it's encrypted with a xkcd-style "correct horse battery staple" format password that can't be bruteforced. That's why I said I'm the only one who can actually retrieve the coins.

>> No.5234149

Just give them godamn money for the computer, u have like half a million there idiot.

Go sell your butthole if you are a retard and cant find a job

>> No.5234187

>>5233056
Do they have life insurance policies?

>> No.5234194

So, I have an idea. It's a bit odd.

Remember the Ether delta hacker (or any of the ico phishers)? Just look up that guy's wallet, look for an address that has quite a bit of ETH. And have OP pull off a stunt where he says he got robbed and needs to access his laptop to try and get back the ETH immediately. When OP has a chance to breath, shapeshift everything into monero as fast as fucking possible (would take a while since you have to do it in batch, this will avoid an exchange requiring verification from you and holding your coins hostage) and leave them ETH for them. They can't be too pissed if you leave them like 10 ETH or so.

>> No.5234236

>>5234125
Why don't you have your 24 word pass code?

>> No.5234247

>>5234030
I don't have the address handy, why would I bother to write that down someone and not the private key?
>>5234059
I go to school for Computer Science and my father still thinks he's "forgotten more than I will ever learn" about computers, he won't buy it.
>>5234149
This isn't about the goddamn laptop you brainlet, they probably know some of my wallets are on there. If I could BUY the laptop from them retail price why the fuck wouldn't I?

>> No.5234266

>>5233056
OP, what they are doing is straight up illegal.You could get the cops involved, or you could just get a gun and threaten them to open safe and cut off all contact. Any parent who does this to a child who has put their hard earned money (presumably from part time jobs and summer jobs) towards a hobby that has now payed off is a straight up cunt and they deserve to get shot in the head.

>> No.5234282

>>5233906
Shit, electronic combination or analog rotating dial type? The analog ones can be cracked with a laser pointer and about ten minutes. The electronic ones might be easy depending on the brand

>> No.5234295

I'll repeat
if you give them half and send it to a wallet from which you have the private keys
optionall set the number of nodes to 0 so their balance remains
you have 100%

>> No.5234311

>>5233056
say you are okay with it. get the trust of them.
than say there was a hack or some shit, some wallet got raided.
tell them you have to check if the coins are still on the wallet.
Than either note the private key oder send the ETH to another wallet

>> No.5234321

>>5233056
OP, here’s what you do. Play it totally cool, like you’re on the same team. Thank them for having the good idea to put it in a safe etc. Explain that it’s time to sell ETH before a crash that you know is coming so the laptop needs to come out. Agree to send them whatever amount they ask for - only negotiate to the extent that not doing so would be suspicious. Give them laminated pieces of paper with the public key of a new wallet and a fake private key. Obviously have the real private key stashed securely elsewhere. Open the laptop in front of them and send the ETH they requested to the new wallet. Use Etherscan to confirm in front of them that it’s in THEIR wallet now, and act as if that proves they have it. Transfer your portion to a different new wallet. And then keep acting cool and try not to be there when they figure out what happened.

>> No.5234322

>>5233056
wtf kind of family is this?

>> No.5234356

>>5233056
Tell those retarded thieves that they can't get the etherum without your password anyway and that if they give it to you'll give them some since you used their electricity and hardware. If they fall for that transfer it all and cut contact. Otherwise try legal action or just take gun and force those faggots to hand it over. Your parents are the scum of the earth.

>> No.5234358

>>5234321
perfect

>> No.5234368

>>5234282
Analog I think, it's pretty old. You can crack those with just a laser pointer?

>> No.5234377

>>5233056
play it cool and then shit on them, fuck them

>> No.5234396

tell them you transferred most of your coins to your mobile wallet already. There is only a few left on your laptop, you will give them 60% of the few remaining if they give the laptop back. Say you are the only one with access to the address and they can't cash out without you etc.

>> No.5234408

>>5233954
ok

>> No.5234420

>>5234368
Good news is gun safes are objective dog shit. Your parents are an idiot. Find the brand and I’m pretty sure I can get u it out easy.

>> No.5234422

Greatest LARP ever

>> No.5234438

>>5234295
Kek

>> No.5234446

>>5233731
your parents molested you so you wouldn't fail in life?

>> No.5234449

>>5234368
If it has a handle that you open the safe with separate from the combination spinner, then you're set

>> No.5234457

>>5234125
Seriously just make up some technical shit, tell them you’ve got to update something, or even tell them you’re going to send them half. Set up a wallet for “them”, make sure that it’s able to be backed up from another computer, keep the secret key, show them you’re sending half to “their” wallet, and half to yours. Then go and fucking recover their wallet as soon as you leave, drain it, send it to yours. And send a text message to them saying you never want to see them again, cos that’s what you’ll be doing.
Maybe even make it more believable by buying a ledger, as an act of “goodwill”, you want their eth to be safe. Ledger would actually be perfect for this.

>> No.5234464

>>5233969
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8G9QIIvSpzE

>> No.5234494
File: 20 KB, 300x250, 1508978301734.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
5234494

>people are still replying seriously

>> No.5234508

>>5234449
Ya literally easy as pie. Anon what brand and we can wrap this up in the next half hour.

>> No.5234518

>>5233056
Actually, I have another idea. If the laptop is a shitty old one, you can take it apart, pull the harddrive out, put that to the side and give them the RAM and tell them to take it to a computer scientist to """extract""" the ethereum from it. If they believe it, remember to thank them lots for keeping it in a safe for you all these years, then move away and cut all contact.

>> No.5234520

>>5234321
Dude, he needs a 3rd party mediator / lawyer / blood brother to pull this off.

>OP tries to play smart
>Turns out OPs dad goes on 4chan too and is now an expert on shit coins
>Threatens to bludgeon his son to death if he pulls any funny business

>> No.5234561

>>5234494
look, he's likely larping but its a fun thread. if op got us, good for him. just let us have fun brainstorming killjoy

>> No.5234590

I think we need more context DESU. maybe you're paranoid? How do you figure that it's about the ether and not the laptop itself? They are probably senile boomer retards and don't even remember what ether is.

>> No.5234597

>>5234520
Honestly, if they had any idea about ethereum or cryptos in general, they would have cashed out by now.

>> No.5234617

>>5234561
maybe he's trying to steal for his parents and he made up the crypto stuff so we'll help him?
maybe not even his parents?

>> No.5234639

>>5233906
Get a fucking grinder 40$ and cut it.

Are you braindead?

>> No.5234643

Hire a locksmith to open the safe when they are not home

>> No.5234648

>>5234590
They put it in a fucking safe for fucks sake

>> No.5234651

>>5233906
>>5234125
Okay, if this is the case, then you can't use force to obtain it. You need to persuade them.
1.- Telling them that you need to recover something that you lost there (photos, texts, games or some other bs)
2.- Actually buying the Laptop (it's probably very cheap now)
3.- Telling them you will gift them a part of the money, and then DON'T do it. Set up an online wallet or something which only you can access.
>>5234295
(A wallet which has 2FA, like google authenticator or a email message to log-in, so they can't access it and immediately sell the ethereum).
4.- Threaten to sue them if they don't return your laptop.

>> No.5234675

>>5234651
>being this retarded

>> No.5234679

>he doesn't have a back up usb with wallet info
lmao

>> No.5234712

>>5233056
kill them, not joking

Your parents are fucking scumbags.

>> No.5234714
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5234714

>>5234639
If OP is serious this is all you need.

>> No.5234737

>>5234714
Surely there are easier methods to kill OP's parents...

>> No.5234740

OP, set up a gym in your garage so you have an excuse to be there 24/7

Use this as an opportunity to break into the safe, replace your old laptop with a new one, and pretend nothing happened.

Cut off all contact with your family after you leave, change your name, hair color, style of clothing, lift, get a tan.

>> No.5234757

>>5234737
No. This is what they deserve

>> No.5234760

You didn't buy BZC yet anon? Kek

>> No.5234770

>>5234737
Yeah but the brainlets with no life experience in this thread are legitimately retarded basement dwellers.

>> No.5234786
File: 756 KB, 552x1120, IMG_0032.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
5234786

>>5234420
Not at home right this sec but I do have an old photo on my from in my parents' garage. Tried to enhance on the safe but I see no branding.

>> No.5234806

>>5233056

not even joking you should beat the shit out of them

>> No.5234814

OP, update us on the type of safe, there's probably a lock smith / thief fag who can help you

>> No.5234825

You're not giving enough info here, OP. Do they know that there is ethereum on the laptop? Do they even know how much you have?

Seems like an angle grinder would solve all of your problems, or even just a few youtube videos on lockpicking

>> No.5234835
File: 491 KB, 895x507, CryptoAnonsMom.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
5234835

You got fucked up parents man.

>> No.5234845

>>5233056
Tell me when your family is on vacation. I'll get the laptop. You give me 20% and we call it good.

>> No.5234854

>>5234786
jesus christ delete this photo you fucking idiot. I'm too much a brainlet to know the specifics but you derive GPS coordinates from photos.

>> No.5234883

>>5234825
I'm assuming they just know he has some sort of internet money on the laptop. They might think he has hundreds of Bitcoins on there. They might think it's worth millions.

>> No.5234884

whew thats rough. you have to do everything. ABOLUTELY EVERYTHING to make sure they get zilch.

Its weird reading since I basically forced my Boomer parents to drop 4k on BTC in 2013. I visit them frequently and we dring champagne laughing about our gans. Not even larping.

Dude your parents are trash

>> No.5234885

>>5233056
>"we paid for it with our hard earned money"
was it given to you as present? then it's unjustified enrichment. you can take them to court.

>> No.5234889

>>5234854
4chan scrubs exif data like every other site

>> No.5234904

>>5234845
I'll do it for 10%

>> No.5234917

>>5234854
4chan scrubs geolocation info, and even if they didn't I cropped this with an editing app that exports to a completely different file format, so I know the data isn't there anymore.

>> No.5234929

>>5234889
Since when?
I know 4chan didn't do that before

>> No.5234934

>>5233200
Lmao. Fuckin underrated

>> No.5234937

>>5233056
You get it anyway when they die so why bother

>> No.5234938

>>5234854
4chan strips exif data no worries anon

>> No.5234940

>>5233056
Sure them anon. Contact a lawyer.

Or lie and say that Etherium is worthless now, or you mined some other now-dead shitcoin that had Etherium in it's name.

TELL THEM THAT YOU CAN ONLY ACCESS THE ETHERIUM WITH A PASSWORD YOU KNOW. THIS IS LITERALLY FOOLPROOF ANON.

Fuck your parents.

>> No.5234956

>>5234786
literally took 20 seconds to find the same image on google. Nice larp, but your time is up.

http://nextluxury.com/home-design/garage-storage-ideas-for-men/

scroll bout halfway down

>> No.5234963

>>5234929
>>/g/thread/43073980

for years now, how new are you?

>> No.5234973

Treat them to a vacation on some cruise. Then take the safe, open it and get your computer back.

>> No.5234983

>>5233906
Alright there's only one thing for it
> prepare some butter
> buy another laptop that looks exactly the same as the one in the safe
> have your parents walk in on you whilst you're on the laptop
> they will go mental, 'reee how did you get into the safe?'
> your dad will go to the safe to check it
> now cover yourself in the butter you prepared earlier
> as soon as he opens the safe, shank him with the butter knife
> he'll try to tackle you but will slip off
> take the laptop

>> No.5234996

>>5234956
fugg knew I should've mirrored it, oh well I have to get back to the wagie anyway. Was fun playing guys.

>> No.5235014

>>5234963
>2014
>for literal YEARS now
Idk, how new are you anon? Odl enough that i remember the site not removing exif

>> No.5235022

>>5234996
Fuck you

>> No.5235037

>>5234996
Lol, was fun anon. Have a great day at work!

>> No.5235040

>>5234786
I could open that lock in 6 minutes tops. Not sure if your parents are dirtbags, or doing you a solid. You sound pissed and have you ever thought your parents put the laptop away so you won't go out all nigger rich and piss the money away? Did you faggot? Maybe someday when your balls drop you will realize they are looking out for your future.
Or they are dirtbags and just want what is rightfully theirs, but I'm gonna bet on the latter. Rage hard faggot. Someday when you have kids, you'll understand my post.

>> No.5235048

>>5234996
bleh. was a fun thread anyway.

>> No.5235049

>>5234996
Your IQ is easily below 110...

>> No.5235064

>>5235049
Says the tripfag

>> No.5235066

LARP. No family is this stupid.

>> No.5235068

>>5234996
Send me eth:
0xf9d7C5AD16BcDAD6FF50b80B559EBdF45b919127

>> No.5235092

>>5235049
Yeah. I already know because I didn't actually mine Ethereum in 2015 when I read about it.

>> No.5235100

>>5233597
Pretty much this. Is safe at your parents house or in a bank?

>> No.5235105

>>5234854
lulz first thing I did but it didnt come direct from a phone to here. Was overwritten no meta info. LOL

>> No.5235108

>>5234956
Good find anon
This LARP was too good to be true

>> No.5235120

>>5235068
my jeet detector is off the charts. Reported

>> No.5235121

Say fine and you will give in and sell. Have them name their cut and try and barter with them (knowing you will fuck their feelings by taking it all).
Send it to an exchange that you are in control of. Have a friend you trust somewhere ready to send to a new cold storage.


1 get access to laptop by fooling boomer parents
2 have friend with your login info ready to send the coins from exchange once you put them on exchange.
3 While the ether scan confirms transaction is going to go through....... DESTROY THE LAPTOP IN FRONT OF THEIR EYES AND THROW THEM 300$ IN SINGLES ALL OVER THE DINING ROOM!!!!


Didnt you see the Oceans 11 movies?

>> No.5235129

>>5233200
top kek

>> No.5235151
File: 319 KB, 896x562, HeIsRight.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
5235151

>>5234996
You fucker!!

>> No.5235169

>>5235121

see

4>>5234996

>> No.5235182
File: 180 KB, 1599x999, 1500874127948.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
5235182

>>5233200
Kekked & checked

>> No.5235220

>>5233838
This. They won't have any idea what you're doing

>> No.5235221

>>5233056
Fuh dem mayne saw te barel off that shotgun and go negro niggaa

https://i.makeagif.com/media/8-01-2015/vsbQ2U.gif

>> No.5235226
File: 175 KB, 817x656, 1513112814175.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
5235226

Just don't give them your decryption key for your encrypted drive. Easy.

>> No.5235228

>lol just kill them
Damn ancaps are scary as shit

>> No.5235251

>>5233056
Tell them there's old files or pictures on it that you want and send all ETH to your wallet.

>> No.5235289
File: 31 KB, 403x403, cat1.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
5235289

i hate the way this thread made me feel

money makes people greedy, its disgusting just awful really

>> No.5235314

>>5233056
Kill them.

>> No.5235355

The state of biz

>> No.5235434
File: 21 KB, 448x442, 1513114482794.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
5235434

>>5233200
Fucking keked. Check faggot

>> No.5235509

>>5235289
Good to know my writing can evoke emotion.

>> No.5235595

>>5234996
Never change /biz/

>> No.5235662

>>5235040
ok mr danny ocean

>> No.5235669

>>5234770
You're probably a low-iq nigger which immediately resolves to violence or acting like an idiot, kys.

>> No.5235739

>>5235509
It's funny to think that this is your fantasy of what would've happened if you actually mined eth back in 2015.
How's the relationship with your parents going?

>> No.5235832

>>5233056

Where you at? If you can get me in there, I'll bust that shit open for 10% of the ETH.

>> No.5235852

>>5235739
Oh I love my parents. You guys would probably get along with my dad, right wing guy that made his fortune trading futures on the floor of the CME. Writing fucked up stories that sound real but have no actual basis in reality is just my hobby, super fun on /pol/

>> No.5236004
File: 389 KB, 1280x720, Baby Boomers.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
5236004

>>5233367

Especially your own parents. It's like they made us just to have someone to torment. Stealing, beating, raping someone you have a blood-bond with is arguably worse than doing it to a stranger.

>> No.5236131

>>5234457
d e v i l i s h
oh god OP please do this

>> No.5236333 [DELETED] 

>>5233731
Dude just put benzos in some alcohol your father drinks. He will sleep so hard nothing will wake him up.

Alternatively, put a hidden camera in the garage to catch the combination.

>> No.5236413

>>5233334
if this was quints i'd agree 100%

>> No.5236618

>>5233056
Get a lawyer asap.

>> No.5236639

>>5233446
This but bring pepper spray so you can fuck up their eyes if they try to stop you :^)

>> No.5236750

>>5233056
Get the same make and model Laptop and pull the old switcharoo one night after staying at their place. (just come up with some stupid reason to stay.) You might also need a lockpick set or something to get into the safe.

>> No.5236827
File: 1.97 MB, 188x264, kramer1.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
5236827

>>5233200

>> No.5236913

>>5233200
Top fucking zoz

>> No.5236980

>>5233969
Your dad was probably falling for dodgy links on his porn websites

>> No.5237190

>>5233056
Steal the safe, break it open, transfer the ETH to your own backed up wallets, get a good lawyer, and worst case scenario you get a few months in jail and your ETH is worth 1M+.

Make sure there is no evidence that can point to your wallet in your name. Bury some codes or something.

>> No.5237227

>>5237190
Also do this fast because when your parents hire someone to help them cash out the money is forever gone.

>> No.5237372

>>5233056
they own the rig not the ETH, let them keep the rig but the crypto belong to you, what you are referring to is applied in corporate world (using company A computer, to work on company B business) not in a family dispute, good luck fucker

>> No.5237817

>>5233906
torture your mom to give you the combination

>> No.5238138

>>5234983
THATS REALLY SMART THO FOREAL

>> No.5238155

>>5233056
be a man, balckmail those fuckers