/biz/ - Business & Finance

[Anonymous No.50981135]

>software engineer
>work from home since corona 2020
>barely do anything, most of my time is spent in zoom meetings pretending to participate
>get yearly salary increase anyway
>manager and team is happy with me, even though i do the bare minimum and barely write actual code because i have autistic leetcode teammates who do all the work
>my 40 hour workweek is more like 2 hour workweek
Literally stealing in broad daylight. Is there no end in sight?

[Anonymous No.50981243]

>>50981135
>wake up
>run script
>change file permissions
>restart service
>70k/yr

[Anonymous No.50981431]

>SWE
>Intentionally create bugs
>Bug gets discussed in meeting eventually
>Know what the bug is and how to solve it
>Solve bug
>Get banana stickers and praise from boss
>Haven't done anything productive

I'm in the window breaking industry running a racket at this point.

[Anonymous No.50981912]

>>50981431
That's ingenious

[Anonymous No.50981998]

>>50981135
managers dont give a shit unless it makes them look bad

[Anonymous No.50982102]

>we need to fire 1 guy

[Anonymous No.50982584]

>>50981135
I'm having trouble getting an entry level SWE job... no internship, degree is on hold for a time until my university drops covid restrictions, still got two semester left. Any recommendations how I can get that first job?

[Anonymous No.50982653]

>>50982584
Also, is it bad if I lie and say I have my degree? Like if it's a small company are they really gonna check?

[Anonymous No.50982671]

I'm in a similar situation here...and I'm more miserable than I've ever been.

[Anonymous No.50983004]

>>50982584
literally just get a (paid) internship and finish your degree, don’t lie

[Anonymous No.50983040]

yes yes we know the lyrics
you are paid 500K per year and you don't do anything
you forgot to say that you were remote and working from Pattaya, Thailand
bluh bluh bluh

IT incels don't know how to lie

[Anonymous No.50983569]

do I need a degree to have a software job

[Anonymous No.50983613]

>>50983569
my degree always get me shortlisted, failed all my interviews though kek

[Anonymous No.50983625]

>>50983613
should I go get a degree at community college if I can barely program as a hobby or is there another way to become proficient that I can actually show

[Anonymous No.50983633]

>>50981135
my job is similar. what do you do in your spare time?

[Anonymous No.50983650]

>>50983040
holy seethe

[Anonymous No.50983802]

>>50983625
hr will filter your application if you don't have a degree, maybe you can apply for a small company but you will need be needing a portfolio (full stack projects to showcase you skill), I graduated at a prominent school in my country but its basically worthless since my portfolio is shit.

[Anonymous No.50985175]

>>50983569
>>50982584
bros, if you actually know how to code, just get a software engineering or computer science degree from wgu. like $3,500 for 6 months, and you can finish within that time since you can just go straight to the test and move on to the next class. no more hr filter.

[Anonymous No.50985196]

>>50981135
>Software Engineer
>50 hours a week minimum
>20+ hours of meetings a week
>Deadlines I can’t meeting without having no life

I envy you.

[Anonymous No.50985216]

>>50985175
i code java as a hobby
like i know im perfectly capable of learning any language to any extent, but i need to make a portfolio while also obtaining enough working knowledge to at least fake competency while i google my way out of every problem
so i basically cant code and have zero experience professionally speaking

[Anonymous No.50985258]

>>50981135
>work from dawn till dusk in engineering consulting with very occasional all-nighter
>let go by the associate director for “not showing the drive, energy and motivation”
How to into SWE?

[Anonymous No.50985485]

>>50985196
you do it to yourself
find another job

[Anonymous No.50985550]

>>50983040
This could literally have been me if I hadn't decided to go into healthcare 10 years ago. I really fucked up.

[Anonymous No.50986127]

>>50981431
>SWE
>Write shitty code, leaving bugs
>Bugs get discussed in meeting eventually
>Know where the bug is and google solution
>Solve bug
>Get banana stickers and praise from boss
>Haven't done anything productive

I'm in the breaking bad industry running a chopshop at this point.

[Anonymous No.50987707]

I want to learn to code unironically
where to start?

[Anonymous No.50987729]

Why is there a trend lately where people claim to be doing 0 work but being highly paid?

Is this the new "Im 6'5 and have a 8 inch penis" type of thing?

[Anonymous No.50987739]

>>50981431
Work smarter, not harder
It's so simple

[Anonymous No.50987789]

>>50981431
Where I work people would be able to see that you created the issue

[Anonymous No.50987907]

>>50987729
>Is this the new "Im 6'5 and have a 8 inch penis" type of thing?
It is in that a few people actually do have this lifestyle. It's a combination of multiple rare factors, at least for me

It takes a certain level of intelligence, craftiness, while also engaging in the risk of not giving a fuck.

In certain jobs, they just assume that someone of a certain intelligence and set of accomplishments is trying to improve themselves, have a long career and do so by trying.

We break the assumptions. Basically, we test just how little accountablility there is. The minimum effort required to simply exist in one of the easier FAGMAN's allows you to truly be a degenerate while collecting high pay.

Then there's the whole caste of VCs and entrepreneurs/old money. It's hard to truly grasp the scale of some of that lifestyle.

[Anonymous No.50987935]

>>50981135
You're on God mode. Don't fuck it up faggot

[Anonymous No.50987940]

>>50982653
yes

>>50982584
connections

[Anonymous No.50987955]

>>50985196
apply elsewhere and ask for 40 hours max workweek in interview for new job

[Anonymous No.50987974]

>>50981431
>Project architect checks commit
>Sees merged PR under your username
>Calls you a retard next meeting

Yeah good job

[Anonymous No.50988063]

>>50987789
>>50987974
Of course he doesnt literally write a PR with the bug you autist retards, you can introduce a bug in a feature implementation or whatnot without it being obvious (same as any unknown bug)

This happening multiple times and everytime the same person introducing and fixing the bug may raise some flags depending on the team/project, but if hes the sole developer of course he will introduce the bug and also fix it

[Anonymous No.50988101]

>>50987729
Its a mix of lots of things but really just a effect from SWEs bring overpaid and the whole fagman being overvalued as fuck, they hire so much people and throw money around, being productive doesnt even matter anymore

See metaverse, 10billion and it looks like a nintendo game

[Anonymous No.50988147]

All work I have done last week and this week
>respond to emails: about 90 minutes in all
>help somebody find a document they needed: 10 minutes
>dialed into a pointless meeting but didn't participate or pay attention: 30 minutes, which I spent muted while shitposting
>"watched" the yearly mandatory half hour HR training video about how you shouldn't grope and rape your female coworkers, not sure why that's still required now that I'm permanently remote but I just let it run on mute while I fucked around the whole time
>tomorrow I doubt I'll have to do anything besides login to my work computer, no meetings planned and the person I usually get email questions from will be out of the office
>I finally bought a mouse jiggler because even moving my mouse every few minutes when I routinely go entire workdays without having to do anything was getting to be too much, it should arrive on Monday and enable new heights of laziness
All this for my salary of 170K, which puts me in the top 0.5% of my flyover Midwestern small town zip code. I see it as reparations for the years I was worked like a fucking dog doing manual labor and food service and retail for $10-15/hr.

[Anonymous No.50988149]

>>50987907
Well said. Very fortunate to be in the group you described.

[Anonymous No.50988273]

>>50988147
>I finally bought a mouse jiggler
>bought
Why can't you just use xdotool?

[Anonymous No.50988307]

>>50988273
Paranoid about IT being able to detect anything I install or plug into my work computer. The jiggler I bought plugs directly into an electrical outlet.

[Anonymous No.50988405]

>>50988101
Retard you do realize they didn’t spend $10B on horizons, right? So tired of these dumb fuck takes from idiots who don’t even know what a quest 2 is. Horizons looks garbage and has from the start. But it’s not where the 10B went

[Anonymous No.50988616]

>>50981243
kek, this is basically my role except someone else does most of it

>chill waiting for devs to complain about something
>a dev wakes up
>a dev runs a script from us he customized
>a dev says it doesnt work
>tell them to change file permissions and try again
>200k/y wfh

[Anonymous No.50988688]

>>50981431
I would put glass dust in your food, you piece of shit.

[Anonymous No.50990492]

>>50988147
If there's one thing I hate doing it's emails. Regularly ignore them for a week+ and upon review they are never that important. If it's important it comes in Slack.
Work remote about 3 hours a day for $150k in small midwestern town. I can definitely earn more, but the question is whether I'd also have to work a full 40/wk in an office (probably)

[Anonymous No.50992703]

>>50988273
any competent workplace will see anything you do on your work computer

[Anonymous No.50992777]

>>50988616
Oooooo compsci bros I’m liking how this is looking

[Anonymous No.50992888]

>>50983040
None of them does any work yet they have team mates that do all the work. Yeah I'd say they indeed suck at lying lol.

[Anonymous No.50992917]

WFH bros, my fucking boss is making me go to the office 2 times a week. It used to be 1 and it was bearable. I HATE talking to normies and the whole office culture. I literally don't have to be in the office at all, yet he made it super clear that now I need to show up twice. What do I do? Quitting isn't an option. I told him earlier that I had an issue with my knee and thats why I could only go once a week but now that excuse isn't working anymore.

[Anonymous No.50992946]

>>50992888
over achieving bugmen who do all the work aren't on 4chan because they're good goys.

[Anonymous No.50992951]

It's so draining to work with many people with so little comprehension of your field. Even people who has been in the same position as I for 10 years use 10 minutes to explain basic shit to me. There is 30 resources allocated to each project, when 5 competent people would be sufficient.
So much time spent making checklists for thousands of objects that someone mindlessly have to check after things are built, contractors doing whatever because there's no one home.

[Anonymous No.50992980]

>>50981135
I literally just quit a FAANG job after three months after spending two years trying to get one. If I told you the shit I went through you'd be surprised I stayed so long.

[Anonymous No.50993043]

>>50988063
>you can introduce a bug in a feature implementation or whatnot without it being obvious
how would you do that?

[Anonymous No.50993046]

>>50987729
Yes, it's one of those things that you hear about online but doesn't really happen in the real world. What actually happens is that they have maybe one day per month where they have to do barely any work (mostly because they worked so hard they completed all their tasks even before deadline) and then they go online and they pretend that one day is their normal day.

[Anonymous No.50993107]

>software engineer
>make $492858371954928358939201 per minute
>do negative work like pouring my hod liquid shit down my work computer's ports and frying them
>also scream NIGGER exactly every 14.88 seconds
>coworkers (all female and hot) all ovulate over my antics want to suck my dick while still giving me new computers to fry with my shit

Sigh... I can't believe I'm getting away with this...

[Anonymous No.50993135]

>>50993107
literally me

[Anonymous No.50993217]

>>50992946
People in CS/math degrees are some of the most overachieving tryhards I've ever seen in my entire life. For some reason there's this online myth that they're lazy or something but my irl experience is the exact opposite.

t. CS major, math minor

[Anonymous No.50993220]

>>50988147
>I finally bought a mouse jiggler because even moving my mouse every few minutes when I routinely go entire workdays without having to do anything was getting to be too much, it should arrive on Monday and enable new heights of laziness
What I do is just run some "educational" youtube videos in the background, so my computer doesn't switch off. This is my go-to video

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X48VuDVv0do&ab_channel=TechWorldwithNana

[Anonymous No.50993248]

>>50992980
Story time?

[Anonymous No.50994325]

>>50987907
>set of accomplishments
>We break the assumptions

And how did you get those accomplishments? Really it's about people who have been overachievers their whole life pretending they're some kind of rebels when they've been living exactly the type of live society told them to live. The literal opposite of breaking assumptions. It certainly has nothing to do with intelligence considering how much these people usually struggle with basic logic, constantly making contradictory arguments.

[Anonymous No.50994745]

>>50987729
>get project
>estimate the required hours to complete the project and add a slight buffer of 10x more hours just to be on the safe side
>complete project project in fraction of the stated hours but still charge all the hours
>free time to shitpost

[Anonymous No.50995039]

>>50992703
>>50988307
Just say it's to inhibit power saving so your monitor stays on when you get up and walk around. It's your monitor and your electricity bill.

[Anonymous No.50995345]

>>50992980
>>50993248
>Story time?
My thoughts exactly; please elaborate.

[Anonymous No.50995406]

>>50993217
they only appear like that because they are just higher performing than you
they actually spend less effort than you do because they actually think before they type and do not need to iterate 12 times

[Anonymous No.50995562]

>>50995406
>delusional cope post

Funny part is that most of them wouldn't even agree with you. Like I said, this is mostly an online delusion in my experience.

[Anonymous No.50995759]

>>50988063
> your senior devs who have been around for 20+ years using the language aren’t going to know the pitfalls that cause bugs due to UB in C++
Yeah, doesn’t fly at my company. If you pushed the code, they’ll call you out for it. They’ll make sure you know why it’s UB, and then they expect you to not do it again. Repeating it would signal your stagnation in your current position. Have to sprinkle in times of real effort to prove you know what you’re doing.

[Anonymous No.50995842]

>>50981998
>managers dont give a shit unless it makes them look bad
This is what I've learned. Hit your deadlines and don't fuck up horribly and your managers will be happy. All the bullshit about increasing performance and climbing the corporate ladder is just a trick carrot to get lower-paid employees to do more work for the promise of future rewards. If you want a raise or promotion, look for a new job. No need to do anything but the minimum at wherever you're at now. Use your excess effort to do things that are beneficial for YOU, not your Jew-owned company.
t. coasting since 2015, currently sitting at 122k a year salary with a bachelor of arts in bullshit

[Anonymous No.50995857]

>>50981135
>investor
>parents play golf with black rock board
>casually get tips
>last year made 1.5 million

[Anonymous No.50995879]

>>50982584
Find an internship on Craigslist if companies aren't actively recruiting you on campus.

If you're not from a prestigious university, no amount of studies or academic research will convince someone to hire you without some relevant industry experience or connections.

[Anonymous No.50995931]

>>50983802
>in my country

[Anonymous No.50996056]

>>50994325
>spend a few years making meaningful contributions to build credibility
>find hard-to-replace niche in company to secure position
>proceed to live off of reputation and reputation alone

So basically, starting off as an overachiever and turning into a parasite when "secure." Almost like a microcosm of a successful business.

[Anonymous No.50996109]

>>50996056

Most intelligent comment because it's the most compressed without loss. Lossless compression is intelligence = Brevity is the Soul of Wit.

[Anonymous No.50996137]

>>50988147
>mouse jiggler
Just run a program to automatically type letters in the team chat software so it doesn't go to "away." Though my manager is never online to begin with either so maybe it doesn't matter.

[Anonymous No.50996147]

>>50996109
>Brevity is the Soul of Wit.
Using quotes to prove your point is low IQ.

[Anonymous No.50996165]

>>50988307
>not working for a linux-friendly company where you can install your own OS

[Anonymous No.50996477]

>>50992917
Stop walking entirely, show up with a walker, mobility scooter, leg brace, wheelchair, etc. No doctors note needed, and pretty soon people will be looking at your boss like “why are you torturing this poor boy??”

[Anonymous No.50996528]

>>50996056
I would like to add:
>occasionally put in heroic effects by working late to fix a critical issue
You can go full parasite, but if you actually put in a shed of effort occasionally, you have something to bring up to performance reviews

[Anonymous No.50996546]

In Q3 2022, Syscon will implement Phase 3: Vilidium. This world's first mature blockchain solution will be the greatest leap for blockchain scalability since zkrollups.

[Anonymous No.50997646]

>>50996528
This too. I sometimes check in late night fixes when I feel especially bad about how useless I was on a given day.

[Anonymous No.50998134]

>>50987729
At first the college grad gets a desk job and they try hard to do things.

As time wears on they find that everything they need to do is either trivially easy or requires knowledge/permissions they don't actually have.

Most of them just get bored and start playing cookie clicker on the clock because nothing they seem to do matters and anything interesting they do is simply not valued by their employer.

Ironically, the cookie clicker game is an accurate simulation of their job.

[Anonymous No.50999311]

>>50996056
The Peter principle in action.

[Anonymous No.50999992]

>>50995406
not most of them but you are probably one of the ones you described i know what you're trying to say
anyway
there's no reason to try the entire industry is a joke

[Anonymous No.51000040]

>>50987729
i work for a swedish software dev company and probably do 4 hours per week. decent pay. no one cares as long as the work gets done. i can imagine people doing even less..
in fact now i am in thailand working remote and no one cares because i do the things i have told i will do, and you know it's hard to fire people here too
a lot of the time in the office is spent on trivial bullshit that is basically eliminated when you work at home.

[Anonymous No.51000058]

>>51000040
4 hours per day*

[Anonymous No.51000195]

How do you guys do it? Home office is boring as shit.

[Anonymous No.51000217]

>>50999311
It's more enabled laziness and lack of passion than general incompetence though.

Since I'm WFH I do other work remotely as well, using my main job to generously subsidize the development of my education, skills, and career trajectory. I've stumbled on some very promising and interested prospects and might actually quit to double or triple my salary in a few months.

[Anonymous No.51000252]

>>51000195
for me it's the traveling honestly, when i am back in sweden i actually like to go to office few times a week but the best thing is that i can easily travel and stay in different airbnb's
when i get tired of traveling, i just go back to sweden for some time

[Blndmos No.51001599]

I just finished grade 12 iand i live in iraq and its a new thing out here alot of companies seek software devs and i want to become one whats your advice and how long does it takes to master it and have a good salary im 18 now, what languages to learn, Thanks.

[Anonymous No.51002504]

>>50988688
This wagie's seething.

[Anonymous No.51002641]

[Anonymous No.51002690]

>>50981243
same lol but it's 70k CAD for me which is poverty tier

[Anonymous No.51003452]

>>50983802
I have a masters degree from Germany and get those messages all the time. I'm at that stage where I'm 100% sure that you will only get jobs from friends and family.

[Anonymous No.51005246]

>>50981135
You are doing more work than management. Stealing from thieves is fine.

[Anonymous No.51005672]

>>51003452
It’s nearly 100% networking for most software jobs unless you really can prove you have the chops. That’s how I got my start in software and how I got my second job. Make friends with those that you can sense are successful and maintain them by talking with them periodically.

[Anonymous No.51005709]

>>50981135
>mechanical engineer
>work my ass off
>40k a year

[Anonymous No.51005758]

I'm 28 and I fuxked up by studying biology at uni. Is it too late for me to learn to code and get a job? I feel stupid every day for not doing CS or SE

[Anonymous No.51005759]

>>51000195
You go out and socialize when you need to. Also, use your work computer for only work. It’s hard to stay in my office after hours, sadly. For me, I play sports to get myself out, meet people, and stay relatively healthy considering a desk job is sitting 8+ hours of the day guaranteed.

[Anonymous No.51005803]

>>51001599
If you want real work, C-based languages. C++ if you can wrap your head around memory management and avoiding undefined behavior. Java is another good option as most companies have large Java repositories. Webshit and Python are prevalent, but you’re fighting against the plethora of mediocre retards that went to boot camps for jobs. Fortran if you really want to hate yourself, but there’s plenty of legacy code bases and few youth who have the capabilities to maintain and modernize them. Though most Fortran repositories I know are government related and you’re definitely going to find it hard to get government related work considering your geographic location.

[Anonymous No.51005895]

>>50981135

>get assigned to a new project
>need all kinds or permissions (VPN, Azure, database, etc)
>request the permissions
>company doing some restructuring in the IT department
>IT department overloaded with stuff to do because of all the changes going on
>haven't done shit in like 2 weeks now because they still haven't given me the permissions

All I have to do really is make some excuse about what I did the day before during the daily standup. No one cares anyway and manager is aware that it's not my fault.

[Anonymous No.51005918]

>>51005803
>. Fortran
Do you live in DC or something? I have never seen any job requiring fortran and I learned fortran in school.

[Anonymous No.51007104]

>>51005918
There’s plenty of Fortran work, but like I said, most of what I’ve seen is government DoD work. I’m sure there’s more, but those are heavily scientific and engineering based seeing as Fortran was used for things like simulation.

[Anonymous No.51007134]

>>50983802
>I graduated at a prominent school in my country
Nizamabad Polytechnic isn't a prominent school

[Anonymous No.51007540]

>>51007134
Nizamabad is better than mine

[Anonymous No.51007951]

>>50981135
When a pathetic faggot has nothing to complain about, he complains about nothing and acts like it’s something. Get a real job

[Anonymous No.51008053]

>>51005759
>>51005803
How old are you if you don't mind me asking?
Also how should I go about learning how to code? Purchase courses and go through them?

[Anonymous No.51008168]

>>50982584
I just wrote a script that spammed my resume to 5000 job openings

[Anonymous No.51008425]

>>50981135
Use this time in a valuable way. QANpaltform just launched their QVM where you can build smart contracts and dapps in any programming language you wish. So it makes more sense to use your valuable time and effort where you are inclined to get royalties as well once the mainnet is live Chad.

[Anonymous No.51008436]

>>51008168
Keke. .. watch out anon

[Anonymous No.51009896]

>>51008436
All we have to watchout for is tye quantum threats but in sometime we will have the quantum resistant blockchain mainnet live.

[Anonymous No.51009956]

>>51009896
Don't rekt the quantum computers are not even in here

[Anonymous No.51009970]

>>51009956
>>51009896 this anon is a moron and he believes in something that doesn't even exist in the 1st place

[Anonymous No.51009997]

how do you get these cushy jobs what the fuck compsci bros nobody wants me

[Anonymous No.51010004]

>>50981135
Secret is doing great when it comes to development and when it comes to developers they are paying well.

[Anonymous No.51010147]

>>51005758
no, because then you will have both skills and i think there is demand for people who are good in biology and coding, as usually it's either or

[Anonymous No.51010255]

Any cyber security or Network admin fags in here? I dropped out of uni and landed a help desk job and got my A+ degree.. But that's it. Currently studying for Sec+ and Net+. Will the trifecta land me an intro networking job or should I go back to Uni for it? I'm also ancient - 30 years old with wife and kids. Help me bros

[Anonymous No.51010267]

>>50981431
>>Intentionally create bugs
how does it get past code review?

[Anonymous No.51010427]

>>50981135

Most of these are larps, don't be demoralized anons, this doesn't really happen.

[Anonymous No.51010582]

>>50981431
>WEF
>Intentionally farm bugs
>Know what the bug is and who will eat them
>Feed bug
>Receive WEF award from Klaus
>Haven't penetrated a single cabinet

I'm in the fourth industrial revolution running a delicatessen at this point

[Anonymous No.51011470]

>>51005758
Try taking a bioinformatics master. It's what I'm doing and I have no interest in the actual field of study I just want to be a remote web dev and make bank

[Anonymous No.51011517]

>>50987729
better than normies bragging about how much they actually work

[Anonymous No.51011539]

>>50982653
No company had ever checked for my degree, granted it probably depends on the employer but I famed my whole resume for two different jobs and everything went fine.