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2023-11: Warosu is now out of extended maintenance.

/biz/ - Business & Finance

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49930696 No.49930696 [Reply] [Original]

and I just want to let all you broke losers(haha imagine investing in imaginary things like crypto) that my zestimate is up another 1.5% today because we bought in the hottest metro in the country. My husband is going to be finishing the crown molding in the basement on his off days(whether he likes it or not) and soon we'll be up 45% on our purchase in just 8 months. We're in a perfect position to HELOC and use our equity to buy a beautiful VRBO in Aspen that will produce never ending income. That is all plebs. The timer for my iced hazelnut latte just rang in the kitchen. Have a good day

>> No.49930742
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49930742

>THE ZESTIMATE IS APPRECIATING MY BASTERD

>> No.49930757
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49930757

>>49930696
>VRBO in Aspern
You're buying a home in Aspern? Very based

>> No.49930846

W...whats a vrbo stacy sama. Teach me your ways

>> No.49930945

>>49930846
its what rich people own that lets poor people get a chance to live like them for a weekend. if they don't clean up like the filthy animals they are then we're gonna charge hefty fees. think of it like an airbnb but a higher echelon. we'll call it the Zestimate Stacy echelon

>> No.49931264
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49931264

>>49930696
>be me
>marry dream qtπ
>buy her family home
>have three kids
>she's a great mom and stay at home wife
>she's frugal so we can save and invest
>she keeps it tight and we frequently have sex
>refinance during pandemic to once in a lifetime low rate of 2.25%
>pay off mortgage and sell family home when kids are grown
>downsize to dream house for two and retire in my 50s
Feels good man

>> No.49931367

>>49931264
Good luck with your fantasy

>> No.49931393

The Zestimate meme is cool but the trad gf Wojak needs to evolve to something different (at least with a dress or hair)

>> No.49931409

>>49930696
I brought my snowboarding club to your house in Aspen and we punched holes in the walls, clogged all the toilets, poured grease down the drain and smoked weed in the bedrooms. You can keep the deposit, cheers.

>> No.49931516

>>49931409
Someone's dog peed on the bed. and we messed with something and the hot tub broke. But great place! Thanks!

>> No.49931754

>>49931516
oof well i'm glad you signed the contract before you were approved. those are going to be costly mistakes. imagine thinking Zestimate Stacy ever takes L's hahaha

>> No.49931816

>>49930696
I want to cum in your mouth while you look up to me

>> No.49931935
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49931935

>>49930742

>> No.49931938

>>49931264
you post on 4chan in your 50s? larp alert

>> No.49931995

>>49931264
she'll divorce you when the kids are old enough and she'll keep the house.

>> No.49932038

>>49931938
How's eighth grade going
>>49931995
It's a little late for that desu. We're pretty much stuck with each other and I couldn't be happier

>> No.49932050

>>49930696
What should I prioritise accumulating for my zestimate folio? Atm I'm ordering
1) Interior design (focus on feature walls)
2) updated worktops
3) a double fridge built in to the other units
4) bathroom refresh
5) exterior remodel (garage, patio, path)
6) idk maybe the boiler?

6 is my main question - should it be on the list? Seems a lot of upfront cost for something in a cupboard

>> No.49932075

>>49932050


>waiting until the market starts to collapse before getting into house flipping

anon... I

>> No.49932190

>>49932038
>she'll never leave me
Keep telling yourself that lol

>> No.49932303

>>49931754
>your claim gets escalated to host relations dept.

You recieve a phone call, 1 week later. "Sorry Stacy, all damages must be repaired by the property owner. It's all in the ToS. Thanks!

>> No.49932323

>>49932075
Sweetie the housing market never collapses. Even the 2008 crash was just a dip, look at prices now compared to then

>> No.49932585

>>49932190
Who hurt you anon

>> No.49934069

>>49930696

>using a HELOC
can't they change the rates on those whenever they want ("at the bank's discretion")

>> No.49934138

>>49930696
I want a Zestimate Stacy to step on my balls, rendering me permanently infertile.

>> No.49934141

>>49930696
Joke's on you: Pitkin County is moving to dunk on STR niggers.