/biz/ - Business & Finance

[Anonymous No.4327903]

You have 30 seconds to tell your 2007 (you) anything you want. Go.

[Anonymous No.4327911]

MINE BITCOIN IN 2009

[Anonymous No.4327964]

>>4327903
Mine btc and hold til 2017. Stock markets gonna crash, buy as much as you can. Bet bigly on trump. Fuck your gfs 3 sisters, they’re all down.

[Anonymous No.4327970]

>>4327911
Gonna have to go with this.

[Anonymous No.4327977]

BITCOIN BITCOIN BITCOIN
$7000 2017

[Anonymous No.4327995]

>>4327903
30 seconds and I would literally rule the earth. "Buy credit default swaps on subrime housing loans. Don't waste your time on double a only triple loan shorts that pay off 200-1. Then mine bitcoin in 2009. invest in ethereum ico. Hold till 2017 april. Buy ripple in april. Buy antshares in june. Buy Equifax puts in august. Buy amazon, and alphabet calls and shares in October. Monthlies. Have 100 billion dollars. at least.

[Anonymous No.4328000]

>>4327903
>buy THAT pizza place
>receive 10k bitcoins for two pizzas one day
>make sure the pizzas are delicious and add a note stating: "you will face eternal regret, buy antshares to make up for it".

[Anonymous No.4328004]

Short the housing market

[Anonymous No.4328010]

>>4327903
Don't worry about and "crypto" bullshit currency you hear about

Go all in on enron, definetly bury all your money into Lehman brother and bear Stearns

[Anonymous No.4328014]

>>4327903
Then use the money to short mortgage backed securities pronto.
Then use that to buy bitcoin in 09.
Then hold until 2016.
Make a $2m bet that trump wins the presidency.
Retire in 2017.

[Anonymous No.4328015]

You fucking retard don't be stupid and waste your money on BTC not on whores.
Also don't let her go you piece of shit.

[Anonymous No.4328023]

You all would mine so much Bitcoin it would never take off lol its the biz way

[Anonymous No.4328038]

>>4327995
>100 billion dollar
You would crash the crypto market at some point.

[Anonymous No.4328041]

>>4327903
stop masturbating

[Anonymous No.4328056]

Leave computer, quit your bullshit "psychology" study. Work for 6 months then travel the world for 6 months. Take more chances, start lifting weights RIGHT NOW. Women are massively overrated.

[Anonymous No.4328058]

mine and buy bitcoin after the gox crash, all in ethereum, cash out before 2018

[Anonymous No.4328065]

>>4327903

you should of pulled out senpai

[Anonymous No.4328070]

>>4328023
Buy a lotto ticket on January 1st 2016.
08, 27, 34, 04 and 19 powerball 10.
Two weeks later you're a billionaire.

[Anonymous No.4328075]

>>4327903
bitcoin.
bet on trump winning it all asap.
"""predict""" important events for free (You)s.

[Anonymous No.4328086]

Buy BTC the moment you can, buy $2000 worth and hold for literally 7 years

Everyone is gonna say this

[Anonymous No.4328090]

>>4328070
damn forgot about the lottery.

[Anonymous No.4328109]

Don't go to college. It's a waste of time and money.
Your degree means nothing no matter what you get.

[Anonymous No.4328117]

>>4327903
Maximize your bitcoin holdings, and learn about technical analysis.

PS: Jews did 9/11

[Anonymous No.4328137]

Honestly, I probably wouldn't get too much money but enough to live comfortably.

Imagine the negative attention and power 100billion would give you. No thanks. I'm not smart enough or gangster enough to handle that.

I'd make the investments necessary to earn about 100 mil and then become some sort of researcher in red pilled matters that are chastised by the science community.

If I did decide to earn anything exorbitant I'd use all the money to fund research to contribute towards some sort of superior intellectual race for galactic colonialism.

Inb4 this normie/faggot

[Anonymous No.4328140]

Short everything October 9th 2007, full leverage, no stop loss necessary. Short the SP500, Dow, everything, FULL LEVERAGE, ALL IN

[Anonymous No.4328162]

>>4327903
Mine bitcoin in 2009
Build up huge mine
Buy all ETH in ICO
Trump will be 45th president of the US. Hang out with liberals during the election night for top keks.

[Anonymous No.4328164]

>>4327903
This message has arrived to you from November of 2017. I will not know anything about the future after that.
Hannah will leave you. Ignore her.
Buy literally as much Bitcoin as you can the moment you first hear about it. Any time before 2017 is appropriate for buying. Do not sell when Bitcoin crashes in 2013 and 2014 because it will grow even bigger in 2017.

When you meet a woman named Michele in college, run away. She literally drugs you, frames you for a robbery, and convinces a middle aged man to rape you and it's terrifying. She's like the supervillain of a fucking movie and will try to seduce you. Run away.

Don't fucking take those ridiculous PhD courses your sophomore year of college. Listen to your advisors.

In 2017 October, take all your BTC, all of it, and dump it into Ethereum. This will make sense later. Then hold until June 2017 and sell.

Following this advice, assuming you didn't change the future by following it, you will now own a significant portion of the world's money.

Watch out for Jews.

By posting this message I ensure that my younger self receives it and thus this is the end of my life as I know it. Goodbye.

[Anonymous No.4328180]

Buy and mine bitcoin in 2009. Sell in 2017 for 7000 dollars.

End message.

[Anonymous No.4328185]

>>4327903
Don't fuck Margaret without a condom

[Anonymous No.4328191]

>>4328164
FUCK I meant to say "2016 October".

Younger me is going to be confused and fuck it up. FUCK FUCK FUCK.

[Anonymous No.4328197]

pop tbat cyst on your penis before may so it can heal when you fuck that cute girl in june, shes your first. fuck her hard too so she doesnt leave you dry in like a day.
then audit stock classes in college and prepare for bitcoin and stocks. quit music and sell your keyboard, your sloth shitty whiny friend ends up making it.

[Anonymous No.4328208]

>>4328117
>learn about technical analysis.

You'd tell yourself to learn shitty projection models that can guess the future, while you can literally tell him future events yourself?

[Anonymous No.4328213]

>>4327903
Avoid bitcoin it's not worth the headache

[Anonymous No.4328217]

Hi Im from the future lol isn't this cool? Anyways bye!

[Anonymous No.4328218]

>>4328140
>has an opportunity to tell himself from 10 years ago about ANYTHING
>gives him to short, which means the most he can possibly make on his money is double
>That kind of opportunity
>only 100% gain

>With leverage fag so it's more than double
Still shit.

[Anonymous No.4328238]

>>4327903

Just tell her that you love her. Even if she rejects you, your life will go on. It will always hurt, but you can live without her.

Don't be a fool and study some social science nonsense. Get into CS, you'll like it even if you might find that hard to believe right now.

Shave. You may think this is a beard, but it is really not.

USe the money you mae from Online poker and buy Bitcoin as soon as it becomes a thing.

[Anonymous No.4328256]

Holy shit.

I've done it. I've really done it. I received THIS message: >>4328164
with the timestamp included 10 years ago and followed its advice the closest I could.

I have been waiting for this day, the day this thread appears, for the past 10 years.

Oh my god. You people don't understand how much I'm crying tears of joy reading this. I don't know how it worked but I received that post in a letter 10 years ago. Thank you, /biz/. Thank you.

[Anonymous No.4328261]

>>4327903

DONT study humanities you PLEB
FUCK your oneitis' ugly friend
STOP playing killzone

[Anonymous No.4328273]

Was what Hitler did really that wrong?
Who was behind the cake theft?
Also fuck your mother if you want fuck

[Anonymous No.4328278]

The hilarious thing about this is that if everyone had done this, it would have crashed bitcoin because everyone would have just held everything

[Anonymous No.4328285]

>>4328256
you're such a dork

[Anonymous No.4328335]

>>4328164
>>4328256

[Anonymous No.4328383]

>>4328137
Why not make billions and then fund a company like spaceX or NASA?

[Anonymous No.4328480]

Stop fapping. Porn will cuck you. Hitler was right about everything except invading Russia in the fucking winter. Also buy Bitcoin and you will be able to fuck Alexis Texas, no literally. She will fuck you. Because you will be rich. I promise. I said stop fapping you daft cunt!

[Anonymous No.4328497]

>>4328383
Ya. That's what I was getting at. After a certain amount of money you start becoming a threat to world powers. The only way I'd take that risk was if I had some sort of plan to start some sort of entrepreneurship in something I truly believed instead of just holding onto muh wealth.

There's still a decision on if you want the attention 100 bil or whatever brings.

[Anonymous No.4328540]

>>4327903
Mine bitcoin in 2009. In December 2016 convert it to Ethereum. Convert back to Bitcoin in June when it hits $400. Convert to bitcoin cash in early November 2017.

[Anonymous No.4328558]

>>4328480
>Alexis Texas
shit taste

[Anonymous No.4328584]

>>4328558
Yeah, but I was dumb and horny. Also wobbly ass.

[Anonymous No.4328586]

Don't play with firecrackers

[Anonymous No.4328588]

MINE BITCOIN, PUT ALL YOUR MONEY IN BITCOIN, LIFT WEIGHTS

[Anonymous No.4328590]

>>4327903
Don't smoke weed. Buy bitcoin, don't watch porn, don't drink, don't stop playing sports. Don't go to college. This was a message left on my refrigerator 10 years ago. Back then I thought it was a joke. I acquired 100 btc and used half to buy a fucking a vietnamese burrito. So thankful i stoll have 35 btc left. I even had a chance to warn my family about the recession and stopped my siblings from becoming leftist retards.

[Anonymous No.4328631]

>>4328256
We did it reddit!

[Anonymous No.4328634]

>>4328586
what happened senpai

>>4328590
>This was a message left on my refrigerator 10 years ago.
Are you larping

[Anonymous No.4328645]

>>4328285
>>4328335
>>4328631

[Anonymous No.4328658]

don't buy the house, wait, then buy OTM SPY puts

[Anonymous No.4328680]

>>4328191
top kek. There goes several millions most likely.

[Anonymous No.4328704]

>>4327903
Buy 100 gpus and dump bitcoin arcross 30 different cold wallets

[Anonymous No.4328723]

>>4327903
06, 07, 16, 23, 26, 04 - powerball 7/23/2017
08, 27, 34, 04, 19, 10 - powerball 1/16/2016

[Anonymous No.4328732]

the future gets changed.
bitcoin doesnt take off. hillary wins.

[Anonymous No.4328751]

>>4328197
Who was your friend who made it?

[Anonymous No.4329012]

>>4328751
hes mediocre as shit. not even good. but hes just tall and not weird looking. i got so much shit from people in general for playing music.

[Anonymous No.4329094]

>>4327903
just do whatever you want, underlining the "YOU"

[Anonymous No.4329096]

>>4327911

[Anonymous No.4329124]

>>4328634

I damaged my hearing pretty bad fucking around with big firecrackers

[Anonymous No.4329166]

>>4329012
OK but like is he famous or what

[Anonymous No.4329184]

Find out who satoshi nakamoto is and kill him.

Also Trump will win the elections, go all in.

[Anonymous No.4329189]

bet 100$ on brexit and trump

[Anonymous No.4329246]

>>4328015
Lmao cucked faggot

[Anonymous No.4329251]

>>4329189
Only $100?

[Anonymous No.4329300]

>>4327903
Get all the bitcoin you can, it will be worth at least 7K a coin today. And spend some time with grandma, she'll be gone in 2014.

[Anonymous No.4329311]

>>4328056
What is this image

[Anonymous No.4329328]

>>4328208
kek

[Anonymous No.4329330]

>>4327903
Don't mine, buy every BTC in site.

[Anonymous No.4329370]

>>4327903

You are a sex addict, get help.

[Anonymous No.4329847]

>>4328162
>>Hang out with liberals during the election night for top keks.

This guy gets it

[Anonymous No.4329869]

>>4327903
>BUY CHAINLINK

[Anonymous No.4329885]

>>4329166
point is that he gets the spotlight and gets to go around traveling with friends and actually gets a good time. im stuck at home losing money.

[Anonymous No.4329890]

>>4327903
mine btc and prepare for the breakup that's coming next year.

[Anonymous No.4330332]

>>4327903
Buy and mine as much bitcoin before 2010 (also, take loans if you can) then get as much ethereum (ETH) as you can on the ICO and do the following trades in 2017:

Sell Etherium (ETH) on 25th of march of for 0.055 BTC.
Buy as much PIVX (PIVX) as you can as soon as you can.
Sell PIVX (PIVX) on Apr 16th for 170k satoshi.
Buy as much Stellar Lumens (XLM) while it's under 400 satoshi, but be carefull not to trigger a pump (in other words, but it slowly before the second of apr).
Sell Stellar Lumens (XLM) on may 8th for 2900 satoshi.
Buy Ripple (XRP) on may 9th for 9300 satoshi.
Sell Ripple (XRP) on may 17th for 21000 satoshi.
Buy as much Dogecoin (DOGE) as soon as you can and sell for 150 satoshi on may 23th.
Slowly buy as much DigiByte (DGB) for under 600 satoshi.
sell DigiByte (DGB) on june 03 for 2300 satoshi
Buy as much Etherium (ETH) as you can as soon as you can.
Sell Etherium (ETH) on june the 18th for 0.15 BTC.
Buy as much Bitcoin Cash (BCH) under 0.073 BTC on aug 17th.
Sell Bitcoin Cash (BCH) for 0.25 on aug 19th.
Buy OmiseGo (OMG) for less than 22k satoshi if you can.
Sell OmiseGo (OMG) on sep 12th for 290k satoshi.
Buy as much Bitcoin Cash (BCH) as you can for unde 0.095 btc.
Sell Bitcoin Cash (BCH) for 0.3 btc.
Congratulations, you're now at 50-100 billion dollars in bitcoin.
Now convert all that to Tether (USDT) and crash the market.

[Anonymous No.4330416]

>>4330332
Wow you really took the time to write this

[Anonymous No.4330434]

>>4330332
>Now convert all that to Tether (USDT) and crash the market.

lel

[Anonymous No.4330511]

>>4327903
if you could go back one week you could retire based off sports outcomes

[Anonymous No.4330575]

Mine bitcoin, make sure your info is safe and accessible

Make sure he doesnt jump in front of that train

Tell dad to get his heart looked at

[Anonymous No.4330597]

>>4329885
thought you said he was your friend. you dont travel with him?

[Anonymous No.4331054]

All of these are retarded. Give him 2008 season of NFL football scores. Tell him to go to vegas every week and bet 25K on a 12 team parlay. Roughly a 450-1 on each bet. Make over 180 million for the season. Done and done...

[Anonymous No.4331174]

Stop trying to be a thug
And when you hear about bitcoins don't mine them just so you can get quality drugs and impress sluts at school! Fucking hold them you edgy little teenage fuck

[Anonymous No.4331272]

>>4331054
>get kidnapped by casino owners after first couple of wins
Great idea

[Anonymous No.4331294]

>>4327903
you will be given an opportunity to buy bitcoin at $.05, toss $100 at it and you can sell it for over 10m, you should toss $1000 at it.

[Anonymous No.4331466]

>>4327903


>Germany trashed Brazil 7-1 in the WC 2014 and wins the final against Argentina in OT by 1-0.

>By all the Bitcoin you can and sell it all on Nov. 8th 2017.

[Anonymous No.4331497]

Buy LINK, BNT, ETH.

Short BTC.

[Anonymous No.4331564]

Dear 8 year old me:
Spend more time with your grandparents and other family. Eat healthy, get plenty of exercise, and never stop learning. Try to make friends at school even though you’re highly autistic at this point. Don’t worry about college, hopefully the new version of you will be way smarter than I am. Find a career you love.
Save any money you get and invest it all in Apple stock at $13 (around March 2009.) Keep investing until it reaches $175, when you’ll sell it.
Put the profit from doing this into a decent house and some land.
Sincerely, 18 year old you from November 2017

[Anonymous No.4331579]

>>4331054

you really think you can give 12 teams for all 17 weeks in 30 seconds?

[Anonymous No.4331632]

>>4331054

Betting establishments have maximum betting amounts on parlays so they don't get fucking wiped out.

[Anonymous No.4331638]

>>4328723
Aren't lottery balls such a chaotic system that even the tiny change in your behavior from getting this information will change the result? Like air particles acting differently for 9 years

[Anonymous No.4331739]

>>4331564
Scratch the Apple idea, should’ve told myself to dump all of my money in bitcoin when it’s less than a dollar and hold until it reaches $7500. Then alternate me could live a comfy NEET life I can only dream of
>>4331638
I immediately thought of that too, the butterfly effect would change the outcome of that significantly