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22005025 No.22005025 [Reply] [Original]

Why haven't we talked about Aris jewels yet?

>> No.22005041

>>22005025
((()))

>> No.22005043

he's packin, you can just TELL

>> No.22005054
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22005054

>> No.22005213
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22005213

> be Ari Juels
> Tell weird philosophy student about an oracle problem and introduce him to your number cult
> "Remember the 42 and 216 goy"
> Tell him that muh tech can solve this problem
> "You can even put your name on this white paper I wrote, Sergey, I get enough credit"
> "You're a smart man Ari"
> Ask Sergey to put together a team of saps
> he meets Adelyn crying over some spelling contest at a local community college and Steve at the bus stop
> Thomas was a neet whose mom forced him to apply for part time work at the nail salon in front of Chainlink HQ
> Everyone else was (((recruited online organically through JIDF channels)))
> Jonny used to post exclusively on anonymous horse and stable coin forums
> "Here, Sergey, Chainlink will solve all the problems of the oracle"
> "Gee thanks Ari you're the best"
> 32 million solved Ari's oracle problem... at least for awhile
> Ari exploits backdoor in Chainlink code
> Tell Sergey
> Sergey is devastated
> Sergey spams "it's over" threads on /biz/
> "It's okay I have an idea"
> Sell Town Crier solution to Sergey "hey I was just working on this and thought you might like it :^)"
> A few more million solved Ari's oracle problem.... At least for awhile
> Ari exploits TC code through backdoor and informs Sergey
> Sergey is suicidal
> He begins spamming tranny porn on /biz/ in revenge
> "It's okay Sergey I've got a new solution to your oracle problem but we have to include my student in this scam I mean company"
> A few more million solves Ari's and Zhang's oracle problem"
Hook, Line, and Stinker

>> No.22005238
File: 376 KB, 781x786, 1583897073228.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
22005238

>>22005025
>ari's jewels

>> No.22005307

>>22005025
is it true he lives in a stone castle?

>> No.22005313

>>22005213
Is it over for LINK? Ari doesn't have any more projects left to sell.

>> No.22005390

>>22005307
That's where he sacrifices children to Demeter.

>> No.22005659

>>22005307
>hold in ID
Yes, and he clearly performs rituals to Kek there.

>> No.22005675

>>22005025

is he the man behind the curtain like Cheney and Bush except Ari and Sergey?

>> No.22005698

How many smart contracts will he setup for girls once they're legal?

>> No.22005726

Alice is 18. Ari can prove it.