/biz/ - Business & Finance

[Anonymous No.18918676]

>Well, Anon let's hear your idea, speak up will you...?

[Anonymous No.18918717]

A brothel where only nolinkers work to serve all the desires of link marines

[Anonymous No.18918740]

>*Unsheathes rifle*
Give me all your money

[Anonymous No.18918745]

Well uhm...its a good pen. It's a really nice pen... uhhhm

[Anonymous No.18918749]

I call it, the world's deadliest game. It is a game show you see.
You get random Americans to pick a retired Navy Seal/Green Beret, you sleep deprive them for a few days (no food too) then dump them on the Sentinelese Island and they must kill as many natives as they can for a day and they get points for how many they kill. If they die, the contestant gets no points.
Will eventually have to replace the natives with nearby Stone Age natives from India and Southeast Asia but we can talk about that later.

[Anonymous No.18918758]

>>18918676
Man Kevin O'leary is such a cunt.

[Anonymous No.18918764]

>>18918676
I'm going to buy Ghost with your money and then pump it to the sky and never dump it.

[Anonymous No.18918771]

>>18918676
It’s a mechanized penis. What?

[Anonymous No.18918795]

interesting that the women are smiling while the men are not.

[Anonymous No.18918846]

a paper towel holder that has a hook for windex so when you walk around and clean windows you can spray, put it back on the hook, and use the paper towels

[Anonymous No.18918867]

>>18918795
Yeah but they’re obviously fake, practiced smiles. If it’s not a smile that also involves the eyes it’s more like a shark. Fitting I suppose

[Anonymous No.18918895]

>>18918676
A musical instrument for your penis - The Penis Flute™

[Anonymous No.18918926]

>>18918795
Smiling is a sign of weakness

[Anonymous No.18918937]

>>18918740
based

[Anonymous No.18918948]

>>18918676
its like tinder but for pets

I'm looking for $15,000,000 at a 2% stake in the company, we have $0 in sales

[Anonymous No.18919090]

>>18918676
Not giving away my best idea but this is my second best: So you have a dog right? And you have to take your dog out to go to the bathroom, what’s the worst part about that ? Reaching down and feeling the warmth of your dogs freshly shitted shit through the thin plastic of the bag you are grabbing it with. How do you deal with that? Well basically you have a tool that looks like those nets that they scoop fish out of tanks with except instead it’s a plastic bag on the end - you stick it right by your dogs ass while they are shitting and it catches the poop and then there’s a button that releases the bag when you want to take it out and throw it away. The dog poop net

[Anonymous No.18919112]

>>18918676
literally 4chan with anonymous crypto tipping. One board would be a market place where you can spend all your earned good boy points (but you'd have to KYC to spend)

[Anonymous No.18919114]

>>18918676
Left to right top row:
>The token black guy. His wealth probably comes from a plantation owner that died with no heirs and everything was passed to a bastard son he had with his slave

>The american psycho. He hasn't felt emotions since being hazed in his Yale frat. He destroyed the futures of 2,000 employees in one day when flipping a company he bought from his friend, and went to celebrate by taking his ferrari downtown, buying a new suit and dropping $1000 clubbing, but didn't get laid.

>The faggot
Probably from europe, he thinks him being gay makes his artsy fashion empire ethical. Goes golfing in a pink sweater on the weekends and beats his mexican maid.

Left to right bottom row
>The karen. No words can describe the depravity of this bitch. She made her money from a dead ex-husband and blogs about empowering women to be ruthless capitalists.

>The american alan sugar
a jew and an italian got drunk in new york and made this mutt, and both neglected him. He wears tacky expensive things to look powerful. Probably too nice, he'll get betrayed and bought out by the actual alan sugar.

>The bimbo
After she discovered she was the most cunning person in her midwestern small town, she quickly rose to power leaving a trail of suicidal employees and STDs. But she never left behind her basic small town fashion taste.

Oh, my idea? Well you see, we take a diverse bunch of business leaders, hype up how powerful and mighty they are, and let them roast the ideas of deluded fagpreneurs live on TV...

[Anonymous No.18919157]

>>18918676
An open source, easy to repair, cheap bulk ink compatible printer

[Anonymous No.18919159]

Teleportation machine using quantum vacuum fluctuations. Will put airlines, Amazon, and cars out of business. Now sharks who wants to go from point a to point b in under 10 seconds? Giving 25% equity for 300 million it's a big discount considering it'll be worth over a trillion.

[Anonymous No.18919179]

>>18918676
>I propose that we KILL all bats!

[Anonymous No.18919207]

>>18919090
If that's your second best idea then you're never going to make it.

[Anonymous No.18919210]

I'm seeking funds to purchase a mixed-use apartment building and renovating it to be live/work offices and studios. Too common-place? Not interested yet? Here's the scheme. 5% of our residents will do sales in multi-level marketing. These salesmen will be able to live in the apartment at a discounted rate, sponsored by their parent company, such as Amway or Mary Kay. By living in a live/work environment they will have the networking opportunities to bring on their neighbors as clients to grow their own business. MLMs will be salivating at the opportunity to grow their marketplace and will partner with us to bring their best up-and-coming salesmen into our community. You as an investor will receive profits on two fronts: from each individual renter, and from each sponsorship from a flagship MLM.
So Sharks, who's ready to make a deal!

[Anonymous No.18919235]

>>18918676
Why are some of them photoshopped to look like bogs?

[Anonymous No.18919299]

>>18919090
diagram? If its like a moisture-proof matt that you lay on the floor where your dog wants to poop thats not a bad idea, and you can probably train the mutt to associate the matt with pooping. Would be nice if it came with air refresher not the shit doesn't smell so bad.

>>18919235
The bogdabots are in everyone

[Anonymous No.18919485]

a gas station that pumps chocolate milk instead of gasoline

[Anonymous No.18919509]

a slaughterhouse....but for jannies and trannies

[Anonymous No.18919521]

>>18918740
I'm out

[Anonymous No.18919559]

>>18918758
No he isn't he's actually a real warm and personable guy IRL. He channels his aggression wisely when it comes time to do business though. It's as it should be.

[Anonymous No.18919584]

>>18918740
I don't negotiate with terrorists, and for that reason, I'm out.

[Anonymous No.18919635]

>>18919559
he just ran over an old lady with his yacht like a month ago lmao

[Anonymous No.18919641]

>>18919485
>user was banned for this post

[Anonymous No.18919658]

>>18919485
Milk stations are unironically not a bad idea. It would cut down on waste from plastic containers. Just bring your own. Now tell me, how much equity do you have in the business and how much profit do you expect the first year?

[Anonymous No.18919678]

>>18919210
i smell a 50 billion dollar valuation

[Anonymous No.18919846]

>>18918676
Need Lori to sit on muh face brehs

[Anonymous No.18919881]

>>18919559
I've met him, he's a cunt.

[Anonymous No.18920422]

>>18918676
Prostate massager with a UV light that sits on the perineum to kill of bacteria that make that smell under your sack and in your leg cracks.