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/biz/ - Business & Finance

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17408204 No.17408204 [Reply] [Original]

>Lie on resume about being currently employed
>Go through interviews and received job offer
>HR now wants background check to verify employment
mfw Im fucked now

>> No.17408221

>>17408204
I'd kill myself if I was that ugly

>> No.17408228

>>17408204
Have your friend lie or something
Or ur just fucked idk

>> No.17408240

>>17408204
face like that = disability pension
Get amongst it elephantmanbro

>> No.17408243

>>17408204
>background check to verify employment
Literally not a thing.
Stop lying.

>> No.17408258

>>17408243
This. Reads like a retarded LARP

>> No.17408266

>>17408204
FUUUUUUUCK WHAT DO YOU MEAN BAD TREES CANNOT BEAR GOOD FRUIT?

>> No.17408271

Tell a stupid, easily verifiable lie.
Get caught.
"How could I have possibly prevented this?"

Funny thing is, the lie probably didn't help your chances at all anyway, so it was just a stupid, unnecessary risk that could only ever end with them finding out and not hiring you.
That's messed up, man.
Tell me, Anon, do you have a history of self-sabotage when things are going well? Do you struggle to accept success, and when you do begin to succeed, do you tend to cause your own failure through poor judgment and self-defeating choices?

>> No.17408277

>>17408204
just lie and give phone number of a well-spoken friend or relative.

i just did this to get my last job, had to give 3 reference numbers, gave my dad, brother, and best friend. they just answered basic scripted questions, name of company, my previous job duty/description, then the HR person asked about my reliability, attitude, punctuality, etc. and my family/friend just gave very positive answers, "he was great", "very reliable", the HR person asked "would you hire him again given the opportunity?", "oh absolutely! of course" they all said.

I got the job, no problems. Making $10k more per year at this company than I was at previous job.

Just use this strategy every time, works for pretty much any position in a company upto middle management. If you get above that into executive positions then obviously you're (likely) going to need more substantive references but for most jobs you can lie and get away with it.

Also lie about your work history, make sure you don't have any major gaps, just stretch the times out, if you worked at a company from 2015 to 2017 and then had a year gap between 2017-2018, just lie, and stretch the job from 2015-2018 instead. Downplay work gaps, don't say you took 16 months off, say you took 2 months off or some such.

>> No.17408284

>>17408204
give them my #

>> No.17408338

>>17408277
kek the state of drooling retards employed in hr

>> No.17408387

>>17408271
Holy shit. Get out of my head. Everything you say is true about me.
But my thinking was that the HR would not want to verify a current employer only past employers.

>> No.17408527

>>17408221
That’s Medicated Pete, used to be an intern for Howard Stern Show. He He’a naturally funny as fuck. Look up his interactions with his friend “Asian Pete” its the best