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/biz/ - Business & Finance

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File: 527 KB, 954x665, go_ahead_sell_me_this_pen.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
16535872 No.16535872 [Reply] [Original]

Go ahead, sell me this pen.

>> No.16535893

Do you like to shove things up you ass? If yes, then this is for you.

>> No.16535901
File: 1.66 MB, 640x480, 1522437894556.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
16535901

I'll do you one better.
I'll let you borrow the pen
You lose it you pay.
You're welcome.

>> No.16535917
File: 66 KB, 576x1152, 47449713329282394859.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
16535917

>>16535872
>I know the password to Belle Dolphin's secret nude stash... you want me to write this down?
>here's a cheque with 5 zeros on it... how are you going to turn it into 90,000?

>> No.16535933

Write today's date.
No paper either? That'll be $5.
And guess what the pen has no ink, another $5 anon.

>> No.16535979
File: 163 KB, 723x666, 1574809414293.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
16535979

"No."

>> No.16535985

>>16535872
Go back to youtube dan

>> No.16535988

>>16535979
based

>> No.16535991

>>16535872
you can stick in up your ass for maximum pleasure you faggot

>> No.16535998

>>16535872
Who is Dan Lok? What makes him so successful?

>> No.16536052

>>16535893
fpbp

>> No.16536078

>>16535998
Charging desperate people 50 grand for courses on how to get rich.

It's part of my pretty bleak future that no middle class jobs will exist anymore and the only jobs will be with apple or amazon mega corps that supply your entire lives needs or instagram girls on patreon and 'education/business/the secret/' sellers like dan lok and universities.

>> No.16536095

Some of the greatest ideas in human history have been recorded by the pen..

Also you can draw tits with a pen

>> No.16536325
File: 734 KB, 1000x693, 3543564.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
16536325

>>16535872
How about a magic trick?

>> No.16536357

>>16535998
hes gay

>> No.16536709

>asset and cash flow backed buyout of pen company
Pen sold.

>> No.16536750
File: 465 KB, 1024x919, istockphoto-599900640-1024x1024.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
16536750

>>16535872
This very good pen, decentralized pen with strong team behind it. Constant ink development and several partnerships with well known pet supply company. This pen is an extension of your very being. You need this pen. You know you want this pen. This pen priceless and only one in existence. You can have it though, it's yours. But first, you must buy it from me. This pen an investment, so even though you buying it from me, you still making money.

>> No.16536758

>>16536750
I'm fucking dead..

>> No.16536776

You own a business right?
How long has it been around? 1 year? 2 years?
No?
You're a well established business, right?
You're roots go deep. When clients see your business they think of integrity, quality, professionalism. Right?
All of that get's stripped away when your potential clients come in, and say "why are you still using these cheap pens?"
Best part is, a good pen only costs $1 each.
Your company profits way more than a dollar, but clients see can't help but worry you're going under when they see your employees writing with cheap plastic.
So, I'll put you down for 100 cases. Who should I make the shipment out to?

>> No.16536826

>>16536750
As a marketer, I would never use that pitch.
1. Bragging about your product is pointless, customers will always feel their product is better. What ever you say about your pen, they will say is the same for their's.

2.Client's aren't dumb. Telling them "it's an extension of your well being", is see through. They were doing fine before you showed them your pen, and they will do fine when they don't take your pen. You just shut down your own deal there.

3. "you need this pen, you want this pen" will make the person say "I don't need it, I don't want it" in their head.

4. You don't want to say "Buy it from me", either avoid the price tag, or say the price tag in the smallest dollar amount.

5. Saying something is an investment is not a selling point. You essentially said "this is going to cost you alot of money."

6. That doesn't make any sense. "If you buy it from me, you make money". Sounds like you're bringing me into an MLM.

>> No.16536839

>>16535872
Buy this $5 pen and I'll feature you on my youtube channel and you can explain why you were an idiot and bought a $5 pen

>> No.16536927

>>16536750
Kek. I'll buy 100k!
>>16536826
This faggot has no sense of humour.

>> No.16536937

>>16536927
I do have humor! The people above and below that post were humorous.
He was actually giving it a go.

>> No.16537464
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16537464

>>16535872
>*takes pen*
ok anon write something down on this napkin..oh what's that? you don't have a pen to write anything down? well you can buy this pen and shove it up your arse and then use those napkins to wipe your ass faggot.

>> No.16537851
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16537851

>>16536750

>> No.16538300

>>16535872
I will fucking murder you through the eyehole with this pen unless you buy it in 5,4,3,2...


Welcome to manhood, faggots

>> No.16538322
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16538322

>>16535872
It's not for sale.

>> No.16538785

Stab you in the back with it.
Buy and I will remove it.