/biz/ - Business & Finance

[Anonymous No.16462546]

People new to /biz/: Yes, Chainlink seems like a promising project. Yes, it seems like the team is full of geniuses. Loads of partnerships. The world is going to run on LINK! Right? No!
Before you buy, let me tell you a story.
I was visiting San Francisco to see one of my friends. We went to a strip club, and while I was there, I saw Sergey, surrounded by women. He was throwing tons of money at them, but not just bills. It was stacks upon stacks of $10,000, sealed up with the white paper bands, like he had just come straight from a bank.
I went up to him and congratulated him on the success of Chainlink as of late (this was about a month ago), and he started laughing. He took a hefty swig from a bottle of Dom Perignon, and said, "Yeah? You think I care, stinky?"
Confused, I asked what he meant, and said that he had obviously put a lot of work into LINK and he should be proud.
"Fundamentally, I don't give two fucks about Chainlink, kid."
He was about to say something else but one of the strippers tapped him on the shoulder. Sergey pulled out from his pocket the biggest ziplock bag full of cocaine I've ever seen in my life. It looked like one of those gallon bags, almost bulging at the seams. The stripper ran off into a back room with it.
He then pulled out a Zippo lighter.
"You wanna know what I think about Chainlink?"
He snapped his fingers and a stripper handed him a bottle of Hennessy. He then pulled about 20 stacks of bills from a duffel bag, threw them on the floor, poured cognac all over them, flicked his Zippo, and dropped it onto the pile. Almost instantly the whole stack caught.
I stared at him, speechless.
"It's called a 'PUMP and DUMP,' kid."
He laughed as he watched the pile burn before losing interest and going into a back room with his entourage of strippers following carrying duffel bags full of what I assume was money and coke.
This is the man you are supporting by buying LINK.

[Anonymous No.16462621]

>>16462546
Dude, I was randomly browsing the chainlink slack a few weeks ago and saw the weirdest thing. Sergey and Rory were having a barbecue. Just a barbecue, nothing else. They were eating sausages. And the chatroom was full of people who were tipping left and right. And suddenly someone donated 200 tokens ($20.99) and says 'show pussy pls'. A minute later he donated 500 tokens ($44.99) and says 'show pussy'. 30 seconds later 1000 tokens ($79.99) and 'pussy'. Then, finally, Sergey stood up and flashed his pussy for a second. Then they banned him. What the fuck?

[Anonymous No.16462965]

I joined the chainlink discord because i thought that there will be talk about the tech. But in the moment i joined some guy named rory messaged me and wanted me to send him pictures. I didnt want first but he didnt give up so i send im a selfie shortly after he sent me a picture and it was my pic printed out and there was some white liquid on it, i dont know what it was but i was weird. Stay away from these guys I think they are dangerous

[Anonymous No.16463313]

Well, anyway, to get back to me, so yeah basically, I just massage mysel- I just massage myself down there and then, uh, and then, uh and then it gets more erect when I think about Sergey and uh, you know, it's still wet but I go back to my bed and uh, lie down, on the bed, and uh like you know I just massage it, I just massage it up and down with, like, you know, one of my hands or both of them at the same time depending on the random moment...? Yeah alright. So yeah anyway, well, pump it down with one or both of my hands at the moment until I feel, until I feel the sensation... where I feel I'm about to lose it, and then it all, it all just the stuff, yeah, yeah, some of my semen comes out. I don't - I don't like to make a mess, so I-... so I-- when I come I have a clean plastic cup by my side and I just make sure to put all of my semen in the cup there.

[Anonymous No.16463402]

I recently met Sergey in LA in the bar next to Hayes hotel. The bar is Jones. He drank beer and watched a girl which was stripping on the dance floor.

[Anonymous No.16463429]

i thought 42 was a schizo, then theres this thread

[Anonymous No.16463831]

>>16463429
shut the fuck up you dont know me

[Anonymous No.16463898]

it'd be cool if sergey went up on stage to an utterly silent crowd and tried to speak but all that came out is a shrill piercing tone that made all the glass in the room vibrate and explode, showering the audience. then when everyone is screaming all covered in cuts and blood he crouches down into the third world squat, and in a dark voice he says "stinky linky poops like pajeet", and proceeds to strain so hard that he bursts all the blood vessels in his eyes and the shit rips thru his beige slacks, slamming into the stage and bounces like a dead cat. because it is. he tuts and says "bad kitty" then rabidly claws through the carcass and digs out something and thrusts it above his head for all to see and it is an immaculate 6" chainlink cube.

the crowd gasps and with a wild grin the red eyed sergey starts to rotate it in his hand and says "meet my friends!". as it spins the cubes sides change to all the different logos of all the different companies chainlink is partnered to. Was that a nike logo? yes it was. adobe? yes. tesla? yes. swift? yes. the bloodied crowd stands and applauds and he spins the cube ever faster. every company you have ever heard of flashes by. general motors? yes. facebook? yes ben and jerry's? yes, fucking sara lee? yes. "we are ALL going to make it!" sergey screams. "ALL OF US!" and the price goes to $1,000,000, sergey is raptured up to alpha centuri, and i'm telling this story to my great great great great grandchild because i am so wealthy i become an immortal cybernigger.

[Anonymous No.16463926]

i thought I was a schizo, then theres this guy >>16463429

[Anonymous No.16464117]

what in the everloving fuck is going on here? 42 get in here and make it even more bizarre pls

[Anonymous No.16464205]

>>16462546
ive known serg for years. hes a standup guy and this is his big tech. we went to nintendo together

[Anonymous No.16464259]

>>16463429
i thought you were a retard and then there's this post that confirms it